Private party

Why does every song I can relate to turn out to be so negative. I used to be such a positive person but seems my life is slowly turning more and more negative. I used to love the holidays.....I used to love time off work........I used to love to be around people. Now I feel so alone during the holidays (maybe cause you are alone genius). Now I feel when I am not at work I really have nothing to do(maybe cause you have nothing to do it with ?) I now nearly despise having to deal with people in stores (maybe some drugs are needed here)

Sometimes I wonder if my "one" hasnt already died or maybe she decided I wasnt coming around so she made other plans? I am not one to believe in "the one" for everyone though. I honestly sometimes feel like throwing caution to the wind and just not even looking for "the one" and settle on " the several" like so many guys do ......This "search" is definitely not working out. Maybe it is time to start anew.