Every now and then we do feel emotional breakdown, but the feeling i felt now is Lost, alone in this world, there's nobody i can turn to talk or chat with, nobody understand me really. I just a shadow in everybody life, Comes and go I wanted to chat with you guys but its just seem yea budying with your stuff or just finding me annoying. The main reason of me annoying/texting you non stop, Cause i don't to be alone, the lonelyness really gets in my head like now. Maybe thats the fate that i need accept. Lonelyness.. Sign..

Why can't Human just make a decision and just carry on with it in life. What the point in saying when nobody else listen, man i tried and already given up, no point carry on trying to said anything, i'll just shut up and carry own making mine decision not your in my life.

Westlife - Hard To Say I'm Sorry. Everybody needs a little time away I heard her say From each other Even lovers need a holiday Far away From each other Hold me now It's hard for me to say I'm sorry I just want you to stay After all that we've been through I will make it up to you I promise to And after all that's been said and done You're just the part of me I can't let go Couldn't stand to be kept away Just for a day From your body Wouldn't want to be swept away Far away from the one that I love Hold me now It's hard for me to say I'm sorry I just want you to know Hold me now I really want to tell you I'm sorry I could never let you go After all that we've been through I will make it up to you I promise to And after all that's been said and done You're just a part of me I can't let go After all that we've been through I will make it up to you I promise to And after all that's been said and done You're just a part of me I can't let go You're gonna be the lucky one Everybody needs a little time away I heard her say This song really nice , touches my heart. Hope yea guys out there love it.

Sign , why does it seem like we're drifing apart, Or imma just think too much , maybe its just a one sided thinking. Thats what been going on through my mind this pass few days , gotta sort my emotion and feeling.

Sometime we may whether life is like a picture but to me its like a picture thats sometime alway linger in the deeper most part of our memory, sometime even the slightest thing or movement can trigger it and lets our remember it, sometimes we gotta place all the different kind of photo inorder to get the big picture that already being lay or shown to us just that we always ignore it and push it aside. Life is like a picture, a puzzle that i alway wanna solve, please guide me the way. sign...

A few words is all its take to hurt someone. It can make a person think real deep or even think what he done to derserve whatever you said , words are like a charging swords , once you used it wrongly, it will impact a person life deeply without you knowing it. And may even scarred for life, Gotta change the way i speak and does things, sorry man i said that stuff which i should'nt even said to anybody, imma really sorry cause i, myself personally had that feeling before. It can change a person mindset totally. Sorry man, if time really in our hand man i will change it all around and not have said those. All my mind fill now is really Sorry.. Had a long day at school and finally happy to get my bursary, but examing is coming near for me and thats means stress is building itself up real quick. After school heading back straight home to watch some show and accompany my dad awhile, beens a long time since we went out and talk to each other, really treasure the time with him. Had a movie with Ray, Eugenie, Rovson, Eric, Alvin at causeway point and all i can said is the show, lighting theif* is just a laming show which i don't really what to introduces my friends to watch its like a waste of time. Man untill now its already 1.40 am and i know i tomorrow gonna be super late for school which i normally does, Not gonna keep this up. LONG PLEASE WAKE UP YOUR FREAKING IDEA MAN!!!! Man gonna start changing myself. My thought, My emotion, My Idea, My everything thats been hindering in my life ...

Sometime we may think life is always the hard way but why don't we look on the other side and start think why is it hard ? Can we change it better? Or have we even try to accept the hardship and change? Woke up in the morning around 6 to be prepared for mine exam and texted a few peps but none of them receive it.... Reached school first time so early and went straight to class as test is starting soon and realise the astmosphere* is totally different from the rest of the lesson, finally felt really wanted to study but its already test period so kinda shagg abit but when the test paper arrived , after a period of time and finished the paper its seen quite okay for me and so on and so on and okay enough already school finish. Went for PM and so on and so on and ray receive a call shortly and realise man imma really suck at making a pep feel better/ or to said give an advice, felt man what good do i have in me, and gave up thinking maybe its just God will.. sigh...

Miss School today , was like man i can't get my ass out of the stupid bed ..duhh. Woke up saw Yonghe text , lazy reply him then went back to sleep after a couple of hour texted eric and asked him whether got go gym or not then he said no and shortly tested rov and ask where's he and wea surprise that they ( Rov,Alvin & Yonghe ) went Pool centre at Ten in the morning till around 3 pm , wow they are sure rich. Met them shortly and played "Lucky" before go and had our lunch at mac before eric came, ate finish and eric reached and we went to Rov house to play Mahjong, went to his room straight after we reach his house and look for whether there's BS classes later and YES guys there is, and a super colourfull insect came pass by and Rov was like all shock and yonghe said its was poisionous* LOL? And we proceed to our mahjong game and yes i lose again and went to BS class, Man the lesson was damn Good, really impacted on me and really do lots of self revising after hearing what the preaching said. Gonna try hard to overcome the challenges thats coming my way. Sleeping timie!! Amazing day !!

Yeah Multiply-ed during yesterday night , After hearing the news , its was kinda mix feeling for me, like man why all the young kiddy came over here , and hey i gonna get this straight i ain't kiddy sitter, but what gonna happen in the future lets leave it to God. After hearing the news my mind was , arrgh imma friggid tired its time for a good rest and hopefully can forget about everything. But thats all dreaming , man its the birth of E506 and the new start of N410 , lets make a great impact in everybody life as we keep looking forward and trusting God. Gonna serve ministry soon, its gonna be tough but i will work hard to acheive what God planned for me. Man the only thing i can't get over is WHY REALLY ALL THE KIDS COME TO MY SIDE !!!! Sign maybe its some challenge and imma sure its gonna be hard... dammit no mood write liao after thinking about that .. shitass...

Man today service was totally great man , really totally felt that i'm not alone and God really stand by me no matter what happen , AWESOME service!!! , had the interview with the security senior and awaiting for wednesday to depend on the outcome whether imma in or out , went SSC shortly after service and went back to pool , lose again , sign.. after that went back home and start viewing peps blog and now writing on my own. To other* out there , its hard walking alone in a rumbling path and with all the trouble and burden which constantly blocking you but maybe you should try share with us and we'll help you clear alway the blockage for you :DDDD Man thats so not me saying all that. ( Sleeping mode ).....

Today early in the morning got a very meaningfull text that somebody send me , man after looking at it repeated times , its really reflect on me , making me see/do thing in a different ways , thanks man .. Had a boring day at school but was kinda happy cause when imma late for class the teacher was going to scold me but after i done his "Work" in less then 5 minute he PRAISE me for being so clever le , never attend class also got full mark :DDDD .. hah the rest of the days was boring and slept throughout my CA lesson and pon so after and went to gym :D , tough day gonna sleep soon seeya guys , rest well..

There's so much WHY* in the world, and may this why* been hunting me the moment i start thinking lots of stuff. Why imma not the popular one? Why imma also felt left out? Why does this always happen to me? Why can't i just get you peps to smile? Why am i living in this world? Man so much things i think of within one second , Why? Maybe my life is just a wastage to this earth , a hurt to the others.. Sign negative thought been invading my brain .. sign...

heyya i know that nobody read my blog so now imma just typing what i felt, man its been a long time since that* feeling came back to me , imma just felt like cutting myself , scolding vulgarites and really bash somebody up right now , that feeling. I really wanna throw that feeling behind and carry on with my life but a song thats random shuffle brought it all back in an within a sec , man what really happen wanna ask that fucking feeling to get the hella outta my bloody damn life , man feeling so fuck up right now , fuck man , fuck everyone , fuck the bloody world , fuck myself for bloody fucking upp with my mind .. Man imma speechless ... forget it...

Mans its been a long while since i last posted the blog , had fun , busy & stress days , YEA ended my one month contact work and i felt so relive man , about to sleep long hours and buy the stuff which i longing for :DD , hah yesterday finally went back to gym after long period of time missing in action but man its tiring after going back , focusing on gym now :D , gotta slim down real fast & not be fabby long!!! Man imma sooo tired gotta go sleep seeya guys :DDDD

Heys guys its been a long time since i ever update or post , Man its been a tough week for me , been working non-stop from tuesday to sat =.= , had a little bit of accident during friday work , got cutted by a metal blade and one of my hand flesh gonna come off, but God place me in a good working enviroment and stuff , they brought me to the nearest clinic and go for 6 stitches , In the end the bill was $127 and i was shock but tommy the asst manager paid and said i no need to return him the money and i was like YEAH? Hahah sat was tough for me, had to wake up early to work and after that rush to a GRAET service where my spiritually father came back :D , Had a great word of God and a Great fellowship after that :DDDD

Man , today im having a bad day , bad start , bad mood with my bad leg.. Woke up in the morning and went to the toilet straight and BANG, i fell down and that a bad start and the moment im down i could'nt even shout and i just laying down there burying myself with pain... Had lunch shortly and use the com , watched lots of show to keep myself entertain and chatted with my dearest Wanying in Msn :DD .... Around 5pm went to sleep cause there's just nothing for me to do anymore and woke up a 10pm and writing this short blog with my bad leg... cya ...

Man my blog is so die and now im here updating it... Man its been a fast two week , been busy lately , finally now a chance for me to expression my feeling , MAN I JUST BROKE MY FEET AGAIN !!!. Urgghh Damn pain man , early tomorrow then go visit the doctor , but hoply i can go service tomorrow :D hope so, awww very tired now and nothing to say only pain in my feet :DDDD ...

Man its Monday now and awww imma so bored , gonna post a short , man today monday was the damn bored one i ever encounter , woke up around 10am in the morning and realise OMG why wake up so early and went back to sleep. After a few hour, its already 3pm and just nice i woke up, gone to brush up awhile before start using com and the boredness is starting to kill me bits by bits, but no choice its a part & parcel of life is'nt it? So watch the show Home Alone 2 and eat my lunch at the same time, after a few min , ate finish and start chatting with our dearest WanYing and she too staying at homie bored , and she went for a nap shortly and chatted with reena for awhile while she waiting for her friend to get ready and going to Vivo ( Starting is Reenatown but she scare hot?!?! ). And there she goes leaving me alone again , starting thinking lots of stuff and now imma here writing this crap loads of shit which somehow i don't even know what immma doing ... Man gonna have my quiet time before calling the brother where they are , Man im sooo wanna smoke , but its the fifth day .. Gotta a feeling that im gonna touch back man ...

Gonna post short about today, Man is likeing you means im stalking you? That a question i been thinking for the past few days, yeah i know you dun want to get into any relationship stuff so is ok with me but i just wanna state my view is i like you, and chatting with you everyday means im stalking you ... Man sometime what your say you think it might be a joke but to me .. Maybe i take it tooo seriously. No mood to write anything already , and just wanna said if you think im stalking you , i will stop now and not talk to you ba... You also got many friends , mlm , the peng and many other more so i dun need to worry ba , And come to think of it yeah maybe you're right i stay up all those nights its becos i wanna chat with you knowing the times diff but nbm..awwww man fuck this shit no mood already.....

Just woke up and like usual went to your blog... Already seem what your post for yesterday will be back did'nt know im back here reading again.. Been listening to the Jesse McCartney new song and its kinda good and meanwhile Been thinking about a sentence that you wrote in your blog and i kept staring at it for about 20 min and now here writing about what i felt cause i know you won't read my blog althought i read yours. The " I hope distance won't become a factor to anything hey ?" its been making think so hard , for the both negative and positive ways, and all i can said is , Man whatever i said or done you would just said " we only know for a short while" and i agree with that, but man i dunno why i had this feeling, we might be knowing for a short while but everything about us seem so smiliar and like know for a long time, but in the end there would be a barrier betweem us and thats " know yea for a short time " .... Mans and thats sentence really has set me thinking lots of stuff, stuff like either one of you like each others , and i even think abuot giving my blessing to both of you, Man its really starting to kills me bit by bit and there's nothing i could do to stop , Kinda felt im hopeless and there's nothing i could write anymore , just wanna express my feeling to something since i don't have a pet or someone close to open up my heart with and there's this blog which being visited by no one and somehow im glad , Man im feeling confused & lost inside of me by there's nothing i could do.... Man its really kills me hards....

Man.. Had a bad start of the day today man, the moment i woke up & was getting out of my bed, i sprain my ankle & i was like WTF?? Man really no mood to continue do anything afterall i missed the pm by MJ and now my leg , but went to bath and shortly went to causeway point & meet the rest, reached causeway & eric shouted at me to faster walk & i just shouted him back ( sorry man, bad mood) cause the bus was a hired bus to bring us to Expo for our service.. After the Service totally no mood, had our dinner at Cine & went to Helen to Window Shopping & went back home shortly. Online my msn after i bath & notice that your Online but did'nt want to bother you thinking you're busy ( as alway & after reading your friday post ) & did'nt chat with you after you online your msn and now me here alone writing the post and going to sleep later , hope mine leg will heal man...

Been feeling moody recently and i really did't expect you all for expecting me to write a long post anyway, been a tired day today after helping out with Rovson at the childcare centre and its quite happy seeing the smile that those children had after playing the games and receiving the prizes ,started to felt moody & went and met some of my Brother and Sis before going to had my second meal after the breakfirst which i had with Rovson before the 11 hour of workings and went to had some snooker game and kinda fed up after some stanger disturbing our game by taking our snooke ball and hide while we're not noticing and got over it soon, Dennis & Jing Hui came and we started playing pool untill its closes the shop and went to the same coffee shop and accompany Dennis while his the only one eating, went home afterward and starting seriously about quitting ciq which has been taking half of mine allowance and really need some time to sort it out. Reached homie about 2 plus am and on the com and staring a the screen and wondering " Why i on the com when i feeling damn tired & only slept 2 hour the day before , why im not going to bed straight ?". And i went to her blog straight & read about her blog post on the 1st of october and kinda surprised that she wore a dress, and hey man must wear more cause really looks good on you. Been searching for an songs that can full the empty-ness in my hearts, for the looks of it maybe its never really exist. The moody-ness/moodless seem to have blend to the inside of me....

Hey guys im thinking gonna give a short one too , been having the goddamn flu and cough like for 3 days and i had even and finally when to see the doctor and took some med which cost me $22.70 and i saw my wallet the hole is getting bigger man , time for me to save up, when to pool centre after that a play some match with alvin and soon after i rush back home as i was feeling unwell and ate my "dinner" and chatting with YOU! Note:These are what i felt and you write your answer on my FB, Hahah here the following question: 1)During the time when you keept asking me to sleep early i was wondering why you kept asking non-stop and maybe you had others to chat too ba , 2)I know that you just broke up so i won't say or do anything and let the time prove everything :D and i thinks its really time for me to sleep afterall you the boss who DEMAND me to go ): , anyway stay happy :DD

Gonna post about the happening things today :D ahhaahaha before sleeping i text rovson saiding the moment he wake up remenber to spam call me wake up cause i scared overslept , and really he did'nt call me and i overslept so i woke up at 3.22pm and needed to reach Causeway Point by 4pm and i was like CONFIRMED late after my bath which lasted 20 min and i rush all the way down and lucky me , they also waiting for other people, Bused to Expo for our Church service and just nice as the service is starting.... After the service we sang the birthday song again for our DEAREST Boon as its his birthday today, and shortly after we went to novena* and had our dinner and went to watch the movie "Accident" and i must said its a GREAT show* ( Only those understand the story line and watch it understand its) and Train back to woodland and sent the Sylvia*(Da jie) home then walk back myself and mood started to change and starting to think alot... Hoping can go back faster chat with you* , but when i online i starting thinking you might be busy so i browse the youtube and had the feeling to chat with you and now WE chatting :DDDDDDDDDDDDDD Cheer up Girl :D

Gonna post a short one as normal , woke up around 5 pm and i realise that im gonna be late for me BS and i rush to the toilet and bath and straight alway rush to causeway and firstly i thought im late but the moment i reach there , im the first and i waited for the rest of them for about 30 min and in the meantime i not sure why but i just thinking of you whether you better already or not , sometime really hope that your're in singapore so i could know your whereabout and keep you in contact and not scare you will do any wrong things cause i could find you , rather then now knowing that your're emotional unstable but i just can't do anything to help you ( IM SORRY ) , soon ray came and we went to the back to smoke while waiting , soon after they came and we went off to clark quey and soon after the lesson we went to long john and had our dinner before going back to woodland pool centre , same old usual place and slack around before taking the last bus home and use the com daydreaming and now posting something here.. im bored and moodless , who could ever cure my sickness ?? Nobody i suppose.

Aghhs SHIT , everything seem way bad for me , even my pimple burst and now im scare there a scar after it heal , haiis gonna post a short post ba , hope everything will work itself out ...

Its the early hour of the morning , was feeling kinda down and moodless.. Look through my contact and they is'nt someone that i can chat with except you* but i was thinking you were busy and maybe you were chatting with other people, there alot of things that i wanna tell you but... maybe its not our fate to chat ba, i hope the present i sended you will reach your there safetly and not lost. Hope after you see it, you will change your prospective view of me.. Maybe i'm too tired out that why feeling like this but i just can't explain why i'm still listening the song you send without hesitanting and maybe its starting to blend into my life, Been to your blog everday and kinda happy for you as your swing been finally done, hope you have fun with it...

Had a tough day today, waking up damn early then the usual self but promised Chloe i'm gotta go for the job interview and i confirm going without a doubt.. TIRED!! Having a bad stomach-ache today, can't eat too much chillies already must cut down !!! Haha after that went to Causeway point FoodCourt to makan before Rovson, syliva and Vincent came to my house and we slack awhile before going to Centre to play our Second Try "Lucky" and i was angry for no reason and totally lose the game.. Had our dinner at RasaRasa and went home early.. Online and saw her online but not sure whether wanna chat or not as i'm quite moodless but she nudge me and we started chatting and she helped me change my blogskin YEAH three cheer for her!!! But till half way i made her piss off and i'm really sorry and here I'm saiding again SORRY , did'nt want to make you so angry... After awhile we trashed it out and everything went back to the Prefect Normal Moment and now while i was posting this we were still chatting :DDD Somehow i'm glad that this happen , may this last Forever :DDDD

Haaiis been feeling moodless recently.. Dun want to push you alway but there seem to be distance from me and you did'nt want that distance to be there , mind telling me what i can do to take tat distance always and never let it come back .... Been reading your blog and i sometime really hope to be the penpal you looking but i dunno it will happen or not ... Kinda think of you for no reason.. Been waking up quite early to a job interview but kinda stress at first but everything went well and now rovson, sylvia and vincent at my house :DDDD

Yeah haha , its been a long time since we chatting and i really enjoy it , but kinda guilty that i told you that news , i should'nt have , making you moodless , but you said your fine and i really hope so , GIRL , let the time prove everything and dun have to do anything ok? Today ar.... Erm wake up use com awhile then follow bathing and went to pool centre to relax abit follow by dinner and off home to chat via msn:DDD ( Been hoping this by scare you busy ). Haha pretty much seem like wasting a days, wanna find work real quick, any job please intro me. Its morning and night over there so please get some rest soon , and dun think about all the trouble already.. Remenber, let time prove them wrong :DDD NIGHTS earthing out there.

Just came back from a 12 hour non-stop mahjong session, feeling kinda tired but gonna go out meeting friends soon so just posting this short post.. Somehow i wonder that i could be lost and not be found to escape the reality , the saddness , the tragic and many thing i could get alway from ... And sometime i felt really really tired but life still have to go on.. My life is getting darker & darker without a slightest light shine upon.

Just woke up , did'nt really wannnt wake up but gotta face the reality in the end , went to bath and on the computer and play some music to keep myself "busy" listening to it instead of starting thinkin about all the FUCKIN negative things which i suppossed i can't get forget throughout my life... Untill now i really not sure of who am i , will someone tell me , why is the question i wanna ask everyone and everything , why i'm writing this post with tears in my eye , why i facing all this shit , why i'm not the person you hoping for , why i just make you happy , why i'm such a failure in everythings , why! why! why! .. That the feeling i been feeling recently , guess gotta take this feeling with me and carry on my lonely road..

Hey man , saw your post and knew that something you can't really control but you must really remmenber one thing, you got to face the reality in the end , i know i not a best person to comfort you that why i knew you could find the best talker around and i know you already know its who ... Really wannt change tat thinkin/heart of yours but maybe you and i belong to a totally different world , you and him maybe having the same personallity and that why its easier for you to chat with ba .. Anyway soo long dun think i could have the chance to chat with you already... Take care man.

Haven been feeling great recently , I may be smiling before you but deep inside my heart i hate myself for who i am , wanna cut myself for no reason , wanna get alway from this life , wanna no trouble , wanna no hated but there nothing i could do in reality , recently now i even not clear about who am i , do i even exist in the eye of human? Or i'm just a FUCKIN passing guy... Nothing i say could even make changes in you ... FUCKIN hoping to leave all the trouble...

Chatted with joy and we agreeed to web cam but untill half i went and play game neglacting her , I"M SORRY and i really did'nt meant it ,so sorry man hope i can make up for you to erase the guilt in me ....

Aarrggh man , seeing your post its so moodless its making me feel so helpless(Not saying your fault), wanna cheer you up but i'm such failure/blockhead in doing this, but no matter what i just wanna continue trying making you feel better but i just dun have the brain/thinking to do that.. AArggh just hoping if your got anymore problem just share it with me , dun wanna see you so moodless anymore.

Haha chatted till all the way morning and thanks man intro-ing me 2 song which i kinda like , haha sended you something hope you will receive it soon and it may cheer you up man.. CHEER UP :DDDD

Been feeling kinda moodless and bored recently , saw you on9 and wanna talk to you but on second thought you may be busy or chatting with other people.. Did'nt want to disturb you that much. ARGGHH damn no mood, miss that time we chatted till 6am(sg)12am(france) , but i doubt we'll have the chance again ...

Yesterday is our Dearest Eric birthday and we went down to pool centre and celebrate but soon after that we went RasaRasa to makan and chat awhile before we decided to go Woodland Garden and chat like we always do and we chatt till 12 plus before we took the last bus home. Today is really not a day for me man, had nothing in the morning but having stomach ache the whole day and even now also pain, wanted to go school but the pain is killing me and tearing me apart, haven slept well the whole nights, praying for healing now, hope its came true like always.

Haha hi guys its me back into this blog again, haha went to 304 and had our dinner with eric, alvin and rovson before we went to pool centre and play and we saw LAODA and he asked us to play with him ,After awhile Terrence came and some of us chatted with him but i dunno what to said, haiis today no mood to play even LAODA put water i also cannot goal the ball, then after that went to Rasa Rasa coffee shop and Rovson, Ray, Jerome, Eric and Yonghe had their dinner before we all went home ((:

Hi guys , its me back to this blog and started to update already (: Had Service today and really enjoying the graduation service and Jerome came for our Service and really glad we can be like last time enjoying together,CONGRATS Jasmine finally graduate already. After Service went Bedok for fellowship and Wanying treat us the BIG WATERMELON dessert and THANKS, after that all bused home. The end don't know what to said already.