I was very honest with the nurse (in the picture) that I was super nervous about donating blood, especially the point where they would insert the needle and leave it there for awhile. This is because when I was younger, I was super skinny and my veins could never be seen. The nurses often neglected to see this prior to inserting the needle, so they always had to wriggle it around inside to find my veins. THAT HURT. Worse still, there was once where they couldn't find my veins in my elbows, and had to shift to the back of my hand. When that failed as well, they turned to my wrist. It was bruised for the next few days. As I have grown and gained weight, it has become easier to find my veins. However, it doesn't make the idea of needles being inserted into me any easier. Haha... Well, but I digress. So after I confessed to the nurse that I was very scared of the needle, she took really good care of me. She was soothing, and let me know what was going to happen at each stage of the process. And surprisingly, the insertion of the needle wasn't too painful! I just winced and whimpered once and it was done. I couldn't really feel the needle inside me as I squeezed the stress ball, which was good. I had been expecting to feel the needle inside each time I squeezed, and that added to my fear. So.. you see? My mind was definitely magnifying how scary the whole situation was. Mine hadn't reached a phobic intensity, but already I was so scared. I guess this makes it more clear how courageous people with phobias are to finally confront their fears.
While donating blood, I was also thinking, I, as a healthy person, am able to decide when and how often I want to donate blood. This process is somewhat similar to dialysis, I imagine. But people on dialysis don't have a choice. They need to have a needle stuck in them 3 times a week - well, haemo-dialysis, that is - which is more than I can take. Imagine facing the same pain and possible bruising each time. Just one time for me and I had a bit of difficulty lifting my arm the first night. =S
After this whole event, I feel really good about myself. Not only did I go ahead with my values despite being scared, I also contributed to the community. It is nice to know that I may have helped save the life of someone who desperately needs blood from my blood group. =)
Wan Yu asked me if I would consider bone marrow donation. That gave me pause. I am keen on doing that, knowing that there is a real shortage of bone marrow donors, and those who need it would really really benefit from it. One of my friends from my CCA in uni has been diagnosed with leukaemia, and I'd really like to think I'm helping his cause. But I'm still scared of the pain! This time, instead of taking blood from the arm, spinal fluid is taken out. Just thinking about it gives me the shudders. I might give it more thought over time, but for now, I think I'll just concentrate on giving blood.