Trust In the Lord
Saturday, August 26, 2006
IN GOD'S EYES
by Candace Carteen, Portland, Oregon
By the time I was ten, I was totally ashamed of my father. All my friends called him names: Quasi-Moto, hunchback, monster, little Frankenstein, the crooked little man with the crooked little cane. At first it hurt when they called him those things, but soon I found myself agreeing with them. He was ugly, and I knew it!
My father was born with something called parastremmatic dwarfism. The disease made him stop growing when he was about thirteen and caused his body to twist and turn into a grotesque shape.
It wasn't too bad when he was a kid. I saw pictures of him when he was about my age. He was a little short but quite good-looking. Even when he met my mother and married her when he was nineteen, he still looked pretty normal. He was still short and walked with a slight limp, but he was able to do just about anything. Mother said, "He even used to be a great dancer."
Soon after my birth, things started getting worse. Another genetic disorder took over, and his left foot started turning out, almost backward. His head and neck shifted over to the right; his neck became rigid and he had to look over his left shoulder a bit. His right arm curled in and up, and his index finger almost touched his elbow. His spine warped to look something like a big, old roller coaster and it caused his torso to lie sideways instead of straight up and down like a normal person. His walk became slow, awkward, and deliberate. He had to almost drag his left foot as he used his deformed right arm to balance his gait.
I hated to be seen with him. Everyone stared. They seemed to pity me. I knew he must have done something really bad to have God hate him that much.
By the time I was seventeen, I was blaming all my problems on my father. I didn't have the right boyfriends because of him. I didn't drive the right car because of him. I wasn't pretty enough because of him. I didn't have the right jobs because of him. I wasn't happy because of him.
Anything that was wrong with me, or my life, was because of him. If my father had been good-looking like Jane's father, or successful like Paul's father, or worldly like Terry's father, I would be perfect! I knew that for sure.
The night of my senior prom came, and Father had to place one more nail in my coffin; he had volunteered to be one of the chaperones at the dance. My heart just sank when he told me.
I stormed into my room, slammed the door, threw myself on the bed, and cried. "Three more weeks and I'll be out of here!" I screamed into my pillow. "Three more weeks and I will have graduated and be moving away to college.”
I sat up and took a deep breath. "God, please make my father go away and leave me alone. He keeps sticking his big nose in everything I do. Just make him disappear, so that I can have a good time at the dance."
I got dressed, my date picked me up, and we went to the prom. Father followed in his car behind us. When we arrived, Father seemed to vanish into the pink chiffon drapes that hung everywhere in the auditorium. I thanked God that He had heard my prayer. At least now I could have some fun.
Midway through the dance, Father came out from behind the drapes and decided to embarrass me again. He started dancing with my girlfriends. One by one, he took their hand and led them to the dance floor. He then clumsily moved them in circles as the band played. Now I tried to vanish into the drapes.
After Jane had danced with him, she headed my way. Oh, no! I thought. She's going to tell me he stomped on her foot or something.
"Grace," she called, "you have the greatest father."
My face fell. "What?"
She smiled at me and grabbed my shoulders. "Your father's just the best. He's funny, kind, and always finds the time to be where you need him. I wish my father was more like that."
For one of the first times in my life, I couldn't talk. Her words confused me.
"What do you mean?" I asked her.
Jane looked at me really strangely. "What do you mean, what do I mean? Your father's wonderful. I remember when we were kids, and I'd sleep over at your house. He'd always come into your room, sit down in the chair between the twin beds, and read us a book. I'm not sure my father can even read," she sighed, and then smiled. "Thanks for sharing him."
Then, Jane ran off to dance with her boyfriend.
I stood there in silence.
A few minutes later, Paul came to stand beside me.
"He's sure having a lot of fun."
"What? Who? Who is having a lot of fun?" I asked.
"Your father. He's having a ball."
"Yeah. I guess." I didn't know what else to say.
"You know, he's always been there," Paul said. "I remember when you and I were on the mixed-doubles soccer team. He tried out as the coach, but he couldn't run up and down the field, remember? So they picked Jackie's father instead. That didn't stop him. He showed up for every game and did whatever needed to be done. He was the team's biggest fan. I think he's the reason we won so many games. Without him, it just would have been Jackie's father running up and down the field yelling at us. Your father made it fun. I wish my father had been able to show up to at least one of our games. He was always too busy."
Paul's girlfriend came out of the restroom, and he went to her side, leaving me once again speechless.
My boyfriend came back with two glasses of punch and handed me one.
"Well, what do you think of my father?" I asked out of the blue.
Terry looked surprised. "I like him. I always have."
"Then why did you call him names when we were kids?"
"I don't know. Because he was different, and I was a dumb kid."
"When did you stop calling him names?" I asked, trying to search my own memory.
Terry didn't even have to think about the answer. "The day he sat down with me outside by the pool and held me while I cried about my mother and father's divorce. No one else would let me talk about it. I was hurting inside, and he could feel it. He cried with me that day. I thought you knew."
I looked at Terry and a tear rolled down my cheek as long-forgotten memories started cascading into my consciousness.
When I was three, my puppy got killed by another dog, and my father was there to hold me and teach me what happens when the pets we love die. When I was five, my father took me to my first day of school. I was so scared. So was he. We cried and held each other that first day. The next day he became teacher's helper.
When I was eight, I just couldn't do math. Father sat down with me night after night, and we worked on math problems until math became easy for me.
When I was ten, my father bought me a brand-new bike. When it was stolen, because I didn't lock it up like I was taught to do, my father gave me jobs to do around the house so I could make enough money to purchase another one.
When I was thirteen and my first love broke up with me, my father was there to yell at, to blame, and to cry with.
When I was fifteen and I got to be in the honor society, my father was there to see me get the accolade.
Now, when I was seventeen, he put up with me no matter how nasty I became or how high my hormones raged.
As I looked at my father dancing gaily with my friends, a big toothy grin on his face, I suddenly saw him differently. The handicaps weren't his, they were mine!
I had spent a great deal of my life hating the man who loved me. I had hated the exterior that I saw, and I had ignored the interior that contained his God-given heart. I suddenly felt very ashamed.
I asked Terry to take me home, too overcome with feelings to remain.
On graduation day, at my Christian high school, my name was called, and I stood behind the podium as the valedictorian of my class. As I looked out over the people in the audience, my gaze rested on my father in the front row sitting next to my mother. He sat there, in his one and only, specially made suit, holding my mother's hand and smiling.
Overcome with emotions, my prepared speech was to become a landmark in my life.
"Today I stand here as an honor student, able to graduate with a 4.0 average. Yes, I was in the honor society for three years and was elected class president for the last two years. I led our school to championship in the debate club, and yes, I even won a full scholarship to Kenton State University so that I can continue to study physics and someday become a college professor.
"What I'm here to tell you today, fellow graduates, is that I didn't do it alone. God was there, and I had a whole bunch of friends, teachers, and counselors who helped.
Up until three weeks ago, I thought they were the only ones I would be thanking this evening. If I had thanked just them, I would have been leaving out the most important person in my life - my father."
I looked down at my father and at the look of complete shock that covered his face. I stepped out from behind the podium and motioned for my father to join me onstage.
He made his way slowly, awkwardly, and deliberately. He had to drag his left foot up the stairs as he used his deformed right arm to balance his gait. As he stood next to me at the podium, I took his small, crippled hand in mine and held it tight.
"Sometimes we only see the silhouette of the people around us," I said. "For years I was as shallow as the silhouettes I saw. For almost my entire life, I saw my father as someone to make fun of, someone to blame, and someone to be ashamed of. He wasn't perfect, like the fathers my friends had.
"Well, fellow graduates, what I found out three weeks’ ago was that while I was envying my friends' fathers, my friends were envying mine. That realization hit me hard and made me look at who I was and what I had become. I was brought up to pray to God and hold high principles for others and myself. What I've done most of my life is read between the lines of the Good Book so I could justify my hatred."
Then, I turned to look my father in the face. "Father, I owe you a big apology. I based my love for you on what I saw and not what I felt. I forgot to look at the one part of you that meant the most, the big, big heart God gave you. As I move out of high school and into life, I want you to know I could not have had a better father. You were always there for me, and no matter how badly I hurt you, you still showed up. Thank you!"
I took off my mortar board and placed it on his head, moving the tassel just so.
"You are the reason I am standing here today. You deserve this honor, not me."
And as the audience applauded and cried with us, I felt God's light shining down upon me as I embraced my father more warmly than I ever had before, tears unashamedly falling down both our faces.
For the first time, I saw my father through God's eyes, and I felt honored to be seen with him.
God bless
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
This story reminded me of myself when i was in sec sch..for certain years in my life had been like this gal..had been ashamed to be seen with my parents (though parents were not handicapped in anyway but just thought that it's really uncool to be seen with them), had been taking them for granted..chose to forget what they had done for me.. n chose to focus on what they had not done..
But now, really thank God for blessing me with such great parents..=) remembering all that they had done for me..worrying and caring for a sickly baby ,waking up early every morning to prepare my breakfast, sending me to/ fetching me from sch thru the years , from primary school to JC, though it means that they have to give up their time to rest..working so hard without complaints to give me the best in life...so loving and tolerating towards me though I threw tantrums, gave them cold shoulders at times,face the computer, notes more than facing them.. though.. I may not be the best daughter..
by Candace Carteen, Portland, Oregon
By the time I was ten, I was totally ashamed of my father. All my friends called him names: Quasi-Moto, hunchback, monster, little Frankenstein, the crooked little man with the crooked little cane. At first it hurt when they called him those things, but soon I found myself agreeing with them. He was ugly, and I knew it!
My father was born with something called parastremmatic dwarfism. The disease made him stop growing when he was about thirteen and caused his body to twist and turn into a grotesque shape.
It wasn't too bad when he was a kid. I saw pictures of him when he was about my age. He was a little short but quite good-looking. Even when he met my mother and married her when he was nineteen, he still looked pretty normal. He was still short and walked with a slight limp, but he was able to do just about anything. Mother said, "He even used to be a great dancer."
Soon after my birth, things started getting worse. Another genetic disorder took over, and his left foot started turning out, almost backward. His head and neck shifted over to the right; his neck became rigid and he had to look over his left shoulder a bit. His right arm curled in and up, and his index finger almost touched his elbow. His spine warped to look something like a big, old roller coaster and it caused his torso to lie sideways instead of straight up and down like a normal person. His walk became slow, awkward, and deliberate. He had to almost drag his left foot as he used his deformed right arm to balance his gait.
I hated to be seen with him. Everyone stared. They seemed to pity me. I knew he must have done something really bad to have God hate him that much.
By the time I was seventeen, I was blaming all my problems on my father. I didn't have the right boyfriends because of him. I didn't drive the right car because of him. I wasn't pretty enough because of him. I didn't have the right jobs because of him. I wasn't happy because of him.
Anything that was wrong with me, or my life, was because of him. If my father had been good-looking like Jane's father, or successful like Paul's father, or worldly like Terry's father, I would be perfect! I knew that for sure.
The night of my senior prom came, and Father had to place one more nail in my coffin; he had volunteered to be one of the chaperones at the dance. My heart just sank when he told me.
I stormed into my room, slammed the door, threw myself on the bed, and cried. "Three more weeks and I'll be out of here!" I screamed into my pillow. "Three more weeks and I will have graduated and be moving away to college.”
I sat up and took a deep breath. "God, please make my father go away and leave me alone. He keeps sticking his big nose in everything I do. Just make him disappear, so that I can have a good time at the dance."
I got dressed, my date picked me up, and we went to the prom. Father followed in his car behind us. When we arrived, Father seemed to vanish into the pink chiffon drapes that hung everywhere in the auditorium. I thanked God that He had heard my prayer. At least now I could have some fun.
Midway through the dance, Father came out from behind the drapes and decided to embarrass me again. He started dancing with my girlfriends. One by one, he took their hand and led them to the dance floor. He then clumsily moved them in circles as the band played. Now I tried to vanish into the drapes.
After Jane had danced with him, she headed my way. Oh, no! I thought. She's going to tell me he stomped on her foot or something.
"Grace," she called, "you have the greatest father."
My face fell. "What?"
She smiled at me and grabbed my shoulders. "Your father's just the best. He's funny, kind, and always finds the time to be where you need him. I wish my father was more like that."
For one of the first times in my life, I couldn't talk. Her words confused me.
"What do you mean?" I asked her.
Jane looked at me really strangely. "What do you mean, what do I mean? Your father's wonderful. I remember when we were kids, and I'd sleep over at your house. He'd always come into your room, sit down in the chair between the twin beds, and read us a book. I'm not sure my father can even read," she sighed, and then smiled. "Thanks for sharing him."
Then, Jane ran off to dance with her boyfriend.
I stood there in silence.
A few minutes later, Paul came to stand beside me.
"He's sure having a lot of fun."
"What? Who? Who is having a lot of fun?" I asked.
"Your father. He's having a ball."
"Yeah. I guess." I didn't know what else to say.
"You know, he's always been there," Paul said. "I remember when you and I were on the mixed-doubles soccer team. He tried out as the coach, but he couldn't run up and down the field, remember? So they picked Jackie's father instead. That didn't stop him. He showed up for every game and did whatever needed to be done. He was the team's biggest fan. I think he's the reason we won so many games. Without him, it just would have been Jackie's father running up and down the field yelling at us. Your father made it fun. I wish my father had been able to show up to at least one of our games. He was always too busy."
Paul's girlfriend came out of the restroom, and he went to her side, leaving me once again speechless.
My boyfriend came back with two glasses of punch and handed me one.
"Well, what do you think of my father?" I asked out of the blue.
Terry looked surprised. "I like him. I always have."
"Then why did you call him names when we were kids?"
"I don't know. Because he was different, and I was a dumb kid."
"When did you stop calling him names?" I asked, trying to search my own memory.
Terry didn't even have to think about the answer. "The day he sat down with me outside by the pool and held me while I cried about my mother and father's divorce. No one else would let me talk about it. I was hurting inside, and he could feel it. He cried with me that day. I thought you knew."
I looked at Terry and a tear rolled down my cheek as long-forgotten memories started cascading into my consciousness.
When I was three, my puppy got killed by another dog, and my father was there to hold me and teach me what happens when the pets we love die. When I was five, my father took me to my first day of school. I was so scared. So was he. We cried and held each other that first day. The next day he became teacher's helper.
When I was eight, I just couldn't do math. Father sat down with me night after night, and we worked on math problems until math became easy for me.
When I was ten, my father bought me a brand-new bike. When it was stolen, because I didn't lock it up like I was taught to do, my father gave me jobs to do around the house so I could make enough money to purchase another one.
When I was thirteen and my first love broke up with me, my father was there to yell at, to blame, and to cry with.
When I was fifteen and I got to be in the honor society, my father was there to see me get the accolade.
Now, when I was seventeen, he put up with me no matter how nasty I became or how high my hormones raged.
As I looked at my father dancing gaily with my friends, a big toothy grin on his face, I suddenly saw him differently. The handicaps weren't his, they were mine!
I had spent a great deal of my life hating the man who loved me. I had hated the exterior that I saw, and I had ignored the interior that contained his God-given heart. I suddenly felt very ashamed.
I asked Terry to take me home, too overcome with feelings to remain.
On graduation day, at my Christian high school, my name was called, and I stood behind the podium as the valedictorian of my class. As I looked out over the people in the audience, my gaze rested on my father in the front row sitting next to my mother. He sat there, in his one and only, specially made suit, holding my mother's hand and smiling.
Overcome with emotions, my prepared speech was to become a landmark in my life.
"Today I stand here as an honor student, able to graduate with a 4.0 average. Yes, I was in the honor society for three years and was elected class president for the last two years. I led our school to championship in the debate club, and yes, I even won a full scholarship to Kenton State University so that I can continue to study physics and someday become a college professor.
"What I'm here to tell you today, fellow graduates, is that I didn't do it alone. God was there, and I had a whole bunch of friends, teachers, and counselors who helped.
Up until three weeks ago, I thought they were the only ones I would be thanking this evening. If I had thanked just them, I would have been leaving out the most important person in my life - my father."
I looked down at my father and at the look of complete shock that covered his face. I stepped out from behind the podium and motioned for my father to join me onstage.
He made his way slowly, awkwardly, and deliberately. He had to drag his left foot up the stairs as he used his deformed right arm to balance his gait. As he stood next to me at the podium, I took his small, crippled hand in mine and held it tight.
"Sometimes we only see the silhouette of the people around us," I said. "For years I was as shallow as the silhouettes I saw. For almost my entire life, I saw my father as someone to make fun of, someone to blame, and someone to be ashamed of. He wasn't perfect, like the fathers my friends had.
"Well, fellow graduates, what I found out three weeks’ ago was that while I was envying my friends' fathers, my friends were envying mine. That realization hit me hard and made me look at who I was and what I had become. I was brought up to pray to God and hold high principles for others and myself. What I've done most of my life is read between the lines of the Good Book so I could justify my hatred."
Then, I turned to look my father in the face. "Father, I owe you a big apology. I based my love for you on what I saw and not what I felt. I forgot to look at the one part of you that meant the most, the big, big heart God gave you. As I move out of high school and into life, I want you to know I could not have had a better father. You were always there for me, and no matter how badly I hurt you, you still showed up. Thank you!"
I took off my mortar board and placed it on his head, moving the tassel just so.
"You are the reason I am standing here today. You deserve this honor, not me."
And as the audience applauded and cried with us, I felt God's light shining down upon me as I embraced my father more warmly than I ever had before, tears unashamedly falling down both our faces.
For the first time, I saw my father through God's eyes, and I felt honored to be seen with him.
God bless
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
This story reminded me of myself when i was in sec sch..for certain years in my life had been like this gal..had been ashamed to be seen with my parents (though parents were not handicapped in anyway but just thought that it's really uncool to be seen with them), had been taking them for granted..chose to forget what they had done for me.. n chose to focus on what they had not done..
But now, really thank God for blessing me with such great parents..=) remembering all that they had done for me..worrying and caring for a sickly baby ,waking up early every morning to prepare my breakfast, sending me to/ fetching me from sch thru the years , from primary school to JC, though it means that they have to give up their time to rest..working so hard without complaints to give me the best in life...so loving and tolerating towards me though I threw tantrums, gave them cold shoulders at times,face the computer, notes more than facing them.. though.. I may not be the best daughter..
Friday, August 18, 2006
Phew!! Finished the first week of school unscathed.. ha yup, sch started le.. This sem got 3 modules,sounds slack ya, haha but it's just the contrary, all thanks to the honours project which keeps me occupied..=P This semester taking 1)Pharmacogenetics and Drug response.. hmm think that this module will be a tough nut to crack.. sounds complicated.. the key is variability in drug responses, factors causing it..2)Protein Engineering.. not very interested in this module, but it will really help me in my project i guess..oh the best thing about this project is can take it together with mich!! =) then also see some familiar faces..ppl whom I have not talked to for very long,glad to catch up with them.. find out how are they doing..3) Dynamics of Interpersonal Effectiveness.. Yeah!!! This is the module that excites me the most haha cos it's really my 'dream' module.. hmm haha ya I have been wanting to take this mod since year 1, but always got outbidded,ha this time i dumped in 1200 pts..*chuckle* and managed to get it!! Yeah!! Hope to learn how to relate with people more, understand my existing relationship with people more through this module, of course, hope to know more friends too..=)
Yup.. so first week of school was packed..but fruitful, think really glad to be able to see all my dear friends again, missed them alot! Did not really have time to catch up with them.. Sirong, Selly, Siva, Weiling.. had wanted to meet up during the holidays, but the amount of time we have is really a constraint..every year 4 student now is spending main bulk of their time in lab.. ha 'talking' to bacteria or viruses, mammalian cells, if not running gels..=P Yup.. i'm one of them, doing that too..
Speaking of project, it's really draining, first week of school and I felt the effect-juggling project, modules, ministry... But I really thank God for His moulding during the holidays..which sorta prepare me a bit for this new semester, helped me foresee some of the pitfalls which I may fall into during the semester..Though the fears and worries still exist now, but I pray for God to remove them and through them, I hope to become stronger in Him! =)
Dear God,
I'll surrender all my anxiety onto You, I know You care for me.. Father i pray that You'll give me peace and joy in my heart, do not let my heart be troubled nor fearful. I pray that You'll give me strength and increase my power for I am weak but You are strong.Help me focus on You!
In Jesus Name, Amen! =)
Psalm 138:3
When I called, you answered me; you made me bold and stouthearted.
Yup.. so first week of school was packed..but fruitful, think really glad to be able to see all my dear friends again, missed them alot! Did not really have time to catch up with them.. Sirong, Selly, Siva, Weiling.. had wanted to meet up during the holidays, but the amount of time we have is really a constraint..every year 4 student now is spending main bulk of their time in lab.. ha 'talking' to bacteria or viruses, mammalian cells, if not running gels..=P Yup.. i'm one of them, doing that too..
Speaking of project, it's really draining, first week of school and I felt the effect-juggling project, modules, ministry... But I really thank God for His moulding during the holidays..which sorta prepare me a bit for this new semester, helped me foresee some of the pitfalls which I may fall into during the semester..Though the fears and worries still exist now, but I pray for God to remove them and through them, I hope to become stronger in Him! =)
Dear God,
I'll surrender all my anxiety onto You, I know You care for me.. Father i pray that You'll give me peace and joy in my heart, do not let my heart be troubled nor fearful. I pray that You'll give me strength and increase my power for I am weak but You are strong.Help me focus on You!
In Jesus Name, Amen! =)
Psalm 138:3
When I called, you answered me; you made me bold and stouthearted.
Friday, July 14, 2006
Back from Alpha camp!! The camp is really a great success!! Thank God for that and thank God for Alpha com as well, all the sweat n toil poured in by the com!
Think went to the camp with a heavy heart.. just don't feel right going,a bit discouraged and worried by the results obtained for my project,a bit of guilt too, seeing that after wrking for two months, did not really obtain much results in lab n keep going for camps...think also feeling some fatigue which accumulated over this period..
Then during camp, got stung by a bee on my leg.. initial thought is oh my.. what is happening? why must it particularly land on me and sting me? God, are You kidding me, I already don't feel very good about going for the camp le, this feeling has to be intensified by the pain of the sting..
My heart was really weary,doubtful, questioning then.. but despite my joyless spirit, i thank God for His grace that He had shown me..Looking back, can see His way of encouraging me, His way of telling me that He cares for me..
1 thing is that during alpha, dunno how,our group manage to be the top-scorer which really turned out to be quite a shock for all of us , cos our group is made up of people who are not very 'ra-ra' by nature.. always the quieter one.. not very competitive I'll say.. ha but seeing that we score so well helped boost the morale of the group, gelling the group.. was telling jia, reminded me of orientation last year.. ,memories of what we went thru tog relying on God.. =P
Besides that, what is even more joyous and encouraging is to see 2 new bros n 1 new sis in our big family!! =) Praise the Lord!!Personally know the new sister and was there when she decided to take a step of faith.. because know what she is going thru in her life now, therefore it is especially encouraging and touched to see her take this step of faith. Pray that she will experience God's love for her more n more in her new found journey with God! =)
Though went with a troubled heart.. but came back with a renewed assurance from God that He will see me through all seasons!
Think went to the camp with a heavy heart.. just don't feel right going,a bit discouraged and worried by the results obtained for my project,a bit of guilt too, seeing that after wrking for two months, did not really obtain much results in lab n keep going for camps...think also feeling some fatigue which accumulated over this period..
Then during camp, got stung by a bee on my leg.. initial thought is oh my.. what is happening? why must it particularly land on me and sting me? God, are You kidding me, I already don't feel very good about going for the camp le, this feeling has to be intensified by the pain of the sting..
My heart was really weary,doubtful, questioning then.. but despite my joyless spirit, i thank God for His grace that He had shown me..Looking back, can see His way of encouraging me, His way of telling me that He cares for me..
1 thing is that during alpha, dunno how,our group manage to be the top-scorer which really turned out to be quite a shock for all of us , cos our group is made up of people who are not very 'ra-ra' by nature.. always the quieter one.. not very competitive I'll say.. ha but seeing that we score so well helped boost the morale of the group, gelling the group.. was telling jia, reminded me of orientation last year.. ,memories of what we went thru tog relying on God.. =P
Besides that, what is even more joyous and encouraging is to see 2 new bros n 1 new sis in our big family!! =) Praise the Lord!!Personally know the new sister and was there when she decided to take a step of faith.. because know what she is going thru in her life now, therefore it is especially encouraging and touched to see her take this step of faith. Pray that she will experience God's love for her more n more in her new found journey with God! =)
Though went with a troubled heart.. but came back with a renewed assurance from God that He will see me through all seasons!
'By the waters still my soul, my heart will trust in You, my heart will trust in You! '
Friday, July 07, 2006
Time
Indefatigable, indomitable in its passage;
Perpetually marching to an unknown end;
Dauntless in the pursuit of its aspiration
An exemplification of undefeated courage.
Steadfast and tenacious it glides
From moment to moment without hesitation;
With an almost reverent conviction
Resolutely it governs the tides.
Never stopping to wait or wonder;
Never in doubt of its destiny;
Never questioning its very existence,
And tearing it asunder.
Perseverance, dedication and fortitude,
Humility, resolution and confidence;
With multitudinous virtues, each esteemed
Is every moment in time imbued.
Shalini Nag
Nice poem isn't it? =) Hee written by Shalini, this phd student in my lab..who thought that her poem is crappy.. ha,but i seriously don't think so wor..=P
Like the last stanza...
Believe the timepoint in life which one displays the virtues such as perseverance,dedication etc,often hold deep memories and unforgettable experiences..(at least for me =P), creating moments in life.. moment.. a point when time meets eternity..
alot of thoughts going thru my mind now..recollections of different moments in my life..cldn't really bring out what's on my mind now as well..mixture of feelings,from joy to fears and worries..
The rate at which time flies is scary..Just feel there is too little time with too many things to be accomplished.Have to 'invest' my time wisely.
Eph 2:15-16 ~
Be very careful, then, how you live—not as unwise but as wise,making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil.
Indefatigable, indomitable in its passage;
Perpetually marching to an unknown end;
Dauntless in the pursuit of its aspiration
An exemplification of undefeated courage.
Steadfast and tenacious it glides
From moment to moment without hesitation;
With an almost reverent conviction
Resolutely it governs the tides.
Never stopping to wait or wonder;
Never in doubt of its destiny;
Never questioning its very existence,
And tearing it asunder.
Perseverance, dedication and fortitude,
Humility, resolution and confidence;
With multitudinous virtues, each esteemed
Is every moment in time imbued.
Shalini Nag
Nice poem isn't it? =) Hee written by Shalini, this phd student in my lab..who thought that her poem is crappy.. ha,but i seriously don't think so wor..=P
Like the last stanza...
'Perseverance, dedication and fortitude,
Humility, resolution and confidence;
With multitudinous virtues, each esteemed
Is every moment in time imbued.'
Believe the timepoint in life which one displays the virtues such as perseverance,dedication etc,often hold deep memories and unforgettable experiences..(at least for me =P), creating moments in life.. moment.. a point when time meets eternity..
alot of thoughts going thru my mind now..recollections of different moments in my life..cldn't really bring out what's on my mind now as well..mixture of feelings,from joy to fears and worries..
The rate at which time flies is scary..Just feel there is too little time with too many things to be accomplished.Have to 'invest' my time wisely.
Eph 2:15-16 ~
Be very careful, then, how you live—not as unwise but as wise,making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil.
Thursday, June 29, 2006
Hei Yu Fen, how can anyone ever forget you?
Wow, been 3 years...seem so recent...you are the one and only temp who still keep in touch.
All us are fine here.---Selin
Hee today received this email from the secretary i worked with back in NHG 3 years ago, the second job of my life.. =P Yeah!! We said that we will keep in touch and for the past three years, they've been forwarding me mails and I'll find out hw they are once in a blue moon.. glad tt they still remember me!! =) Will try to keep in touch with the rest of my friends whom I seldom see as well..including freshmen i've got to knoe when they first enter uni.. glad to be able to call them as frens =)
"If you are going to gain anything in life, gain a friend, they will always be there, and that makes all the difference in the world." =)
Wow, been 3 years...seem so recent...you are the one and only temp who still keep in touch.
All us are fine here.---Selin
Hee today received this email from the secretary i worked with back in NHG 3 years ago, the second job of my life.. =P Yeah!! We said that we will keep in touch and for the past three years, they've been forwarding me mails and I'll find out hw they are once in a blue moon.. glad tt they still remember me!! =) Will try to keep in touch with the rest of my friends whom I seldom see as well..including freshmen i've got to knoe when they first enter uni.. glad to be able to call them as frens =)
"If you are going to gain anything in life, gain a friend, they will always be there, and that makes all the difference in the world." =)
Sunday, June 04, 2006
OUR VERY FIRST UNI DISTRICT CAMP!!!
Venue: Changi aloha! Great spacious rooms, hee almost all got a bed, wat a luxury! =)
Opening night event: DA CHANG JIN style competition, the theme of fish!!Hee fishermen must know how to cook fishes ya.. =P Different cgs came up with really brilliant dishes, which not only taste good, look good, but with significance too!Hee the sole judge is pastor jeff,a food gourmet, tough job..
A night walk from changi aloha to a road which seems never ending near changi airport.. enjoyed the long, but meaningful walk..
My wonderful, wonderful CG! With an addition of a pretty sister, Joyce from NUS T =)
The NUS family =)
This entire uni district cmp ended 11 days ago.. the entire camp was a learning experience for me..from planning to executing.. difficulties in planning and hiccups during the camp were very much 'soothe' by the support and help by wj, claramae, shir..also learnt alot from bros n sis whom i've never served with b4(from other sub d).. their spirit of commitment, excellence.. as each of them put in their best to make this camp possible.. =)Thank God for all of them!
Venue: Changi aloha! Great spacious rooms, hee almost all got a bed, wat a luxury! =)
Opening night event: DA CHANG JIN style competition, the theme of fish!!Hee fishermen must know how to cook fishes ya.. =P Different cgs came up with really brilliant dishes, which not only taste good, look good, but with significance too!Hee the sole judge is pastor jeff,a food gourmet, tough job..
A night walk from changi aloha to a road which seems never ending near changi airport.. enjoyed the long, but meaningful walk..
My wonderful, wonderful CG! With an addition of a pretty sister, Joyce from NUS T =)
The NUS family =)
This entire uni district cmp ended 11 days ago.. the entire camp was a learning experience for me..from planning to executing.. difficulties in planning and hiccups during the camp were very much 'soothe' by the support and help by wj, claramae, shir..also learnt alot from bros n sis whom i've never served with b4(from other sub d).. their spirit of commitment, excellence.. as each of them put in their best to make this camp possible.. =)Thank God for all of them!
Friday, May 12, 2006
Been such a long time since i last blogged..ended my exams.. hw have i been?
20th April - 3rd May: busy preparing for exams.. Not sure this time round how will i do, cannot really gauge, but really think that I have done my best, will leave the rest to God. =)
3rd- 8th May: Thinking abt some stuff, watched 'eight below' ( great film!!! =) haha not only because there are lotsa dogs inside..but the bond between the guide n the dogs n dogs n dogs r really touching)
went for the farewell chalet for the graduates..mixture of feelings during the chalet..haha thought that i can 'save' my tears..trying hard to control le =P haiz.. but eventually failed to do so.. the thought of how God brought us through the experiences for one year, then becoming grwing this frenship is really amazing! From the time when the new nusb1 was formed, not knowing how to support jia, till nw, taking care of e cg.. Then it's also with the thought that given time, our frenship could have grown deeper.. so it's with a bit of regret here.. e same for other bro n sis, haven really got to knoe them well n they moving on le..hmm, but guess this is not the end..hope to stay in touch n serve together in future!
9th May : Started my final year project.. initially just thought that will be meeting the prof to discuss then can go home.. but b4 i know it, ended up in the lab.. ha din even bring my pen wor.. then have been gg bck to sch for it since then..
hmm, maybe bcos i'm new.. find it hard to settle into the lab.. pray tt i can break the ice there fast n get familiarise with the place..to know the ppl there think the feeling there in the lab is similar to the one when i was wrking in stand chart.. nt a pleasant one n one which if i can will want to avoid .. but hope to grow more socially mature.. =)
Oh, thru the project, may have a chance work in IMCB lab in Biopolis! Cool!! Will be gg for a safety training there on Monday, if all goes well, may get an access card to the lab soon!!
10th May: met up with the gals!! yun, clara n xinyi.. v v v long never c them le.. went to a jap restaurant for dinner.. woah the desserts there r beautiful n looks yummy.. hmm but after eating a tempura bento, no room for desserts le..shall go again when i have money to spare..=P
20th April - 3rd May: busy preparing for exams.. Not sure this time round how will i do, cannot really gauge, but really think that I have done my best, will leave the rest to God. =)
3rd- 8th May: Thinking abt some stuff, watched 'eight below' ( great film!!! =) haha not only because there are lotsa dogs inside..but the bond between the guide n the dogs n dogs n dogs r really touching)
went for the farewell chalet for the graduates..mixture of feelings during the chalet..haha thought that i can 'save' my tears..trying hard to control le =P haiz.. but eventually failed to do so.. the thought of how God brought us through the experiences for one year, then becoming grwing this frenship is really amazing! From the time when the new nusb1 was formed, not knowing how to support jia, till nw, taking care of e cg.. Then it's also with the thought that given time, our frenship could have grown deeper.. so it's with a bit of regret here.. e same for other bro n sis, haven really got to knoe them well n they moving on le..hmm, but guess this is not the end..hope to stay in touch n serve together in future!
9th May : Started my final year project.. initially just thought that will be meeting the prof to discuss then can go home.. but b4 i know it, ended up in the lab.. ha din even bring my pen wor.. then have been gg bck to sch for it since then..
hmm, maybe bcos i'm new.. find it hard to settle into the lab.. pray tt i can break the ice there fast n get familiarise with the place..to know the ppl there think the feeling there in the lab is similar to the one when i was wrking in stand chart.. nt a pleasant one n one which if i can will want to avoid .. but hope to grow more socially mature.. =)
Oh, thru the project, may have a chance work in IMCB lab in Biopolis! Cool!! Will be gg for a safety training there on Monday, if all goes well, may get an access card to the lab soon!!
10th May: met up with the gals!! yun, clara n xinyi.. v v v long never c them le.. went to a jap restaurant for dinner.. woah the desserts there r beautiful n looks yummy.. hmm but after eating a tempura bento, no room for desserts le..shall go again when i have money to spare..=P
Thursday, April 20, 2006
Just as I am busying studying, saw an exciting email about Duke-NUS Graduate medical school,w hich will kick off next year wor!! =)This is a graduate-entry four-year medical programme which will lead to a Doctor of Medicine (M.D.) degree =P
Requirements!
remarkable academic records with clear evidence of leadership, scholarship, and motivation for a career in medicine.
Academic requirements
Candidates must submit official transcripts showing the following:
Completion of at least the equivalent of an American bachelor’s degree by the time of admission to the GMS.
Demonstrated evidence of competence in core areas of general chemistry, physics, biology, and organic chemistry. Successful completion of university courses in biochemistry and cell biology is also recommended.
Students with advanced degrees in scientific fields are encouraged to apply.
MCAT requirements
All applicants must have taken the Medical College Admission Test, administered by the Association of American Medical Colleges. The MCAT is a standardized test that demonstrates students’ understanding of verbal reasoning, physical sciences (chemistry and physics), biological sciences (biology, chemistry, organic chemistry), and writing skills.
While there is no definitive score requirement for applicants, most entering medical students at Duke have MCAT scores of 30+ and the average score is 35.
Additional requirements
Two letters of recommendation from teachers/supervisors
Formal letter of intent demonstrating evidence of interest in creative thought, research, and innovation.
Interview on the GMS campus in Singapore (If selected for an interview, applicants may apply for travel awards to partially offset travel expenses.)
On-the-spot essay during interview process
Proof of meeting health requirements, including negative Hepatitis B status and Hepatitis B immunity. Applicants testing positive for Hepatitis B surface antigen are not eligible for medical school in Singapore, regardless of Hepatitis B e-antigen status, in accordance with Ministry of Health regulations
Woah!! What a long list of requirements??!! They will only be taking in 25 ppl.. hmmm if i can get in.. it'll be a dream come true.. =P hee dreaming amidst the busyness n aiming for the stars..=)
Requirements!
remarkable academic records with clear evidence of leadership, scholarship, and motivation for a career in medicine.
Academic requirements
Candidates must submit official transcripts showing the following:
Completion of at least the equivalent of an American bachelor’s degree by the time of admission to the GMS.
Demonstrated evidence of competence in core areas of general chemistry, physics, biology, and organic chemistry. Successful completion of university courses in biochemistry and cell biology is also recommended.
Students with advanced degrees in scientific fields are encouraged to apply.
MCAT requirements
All applicants must have taken the Medical College Admission Test, administered by the Association of American Medical Colleges. The MCAT is a standardized test that demonstrates students’ understanding of verbal reasoning, physical sciences (chemistry and physics), biological sciences (biology, chemistry, organic chemistry), and writing skills.
While there is no definitive score requirement for applicants, most entering medical students at Duke have MCAT scores of 30+ and the average score is 35.
Additional requirements
Two letters of recommendation from teachers/supervisors
Formal letter of intent demonstrating evidence of interest in creative thought, research, and innovation.
Interview on the GMS campus in Singapore (If selected for an interview, applicants may apply for travel awards to partially offset travel expenses.)
On-the-spot essay during interview process
Proof of meeting health requirements, including negative Hepatitis B status and Hepatitis B immunity. Applicants testing positive for Hepatitis B surface antigen are not eligible for medical school in Singapore, regardless of Hepatitis B e-antigen status, in accordance with Ministry of Health regulations
Woah!! What a long list of requirements??!! They will only be taking in 25 ppl.. hmmm if i can get in.. it'll be a dream come true.. =P hee dreaming amidst the busyness n aiming for the stars..=)
Tuesday, March 28, 2006
Presentation
Long n tiring day,yesterday.. n there's a much dreaded presentation first thing in the morning..Only managed to finish preparing and practising the presentation at 2am mon morning, so was feeling a little jittery about it..but this morn, decided to commit my fears to God, kept praying for peace..Finally.. it's my turn haha.. think i speak quite fast, so as to keep it within the time limit.. think my presentation wasn't that spectacular as some, but i thank God for the peace that He has given me, when presenting, din feel nervous and my voice din tremble (ha norm when i spk in a crowd, my voice will tremble, esp if loudness is required..=P) Then, the qn posted by the e lecturer was manageable also..=) whew!! just so glad that it's over.. 2 presentations, 1 project down.. so left with 1 project, 1 presentation, 1 test and 1 journal critic assignment.. Have to jia you!!!
learnt abt prayer at dcltp.. one thing that was shared was on persistent prayer.. persistent prayer is more than just keep repeating our requests to God, it is through the prayer to seek God , to know more about God's heartbeat..
Was just thinking, sometimes i'm quite 'persistent' in my prayer..in the sense, if my prayer was unanswered, i keep praying for the same thing.. like nagging at God..but forgetting to ask God about His opinion about my request, forgetting to spend time to listen to Him...
learnt that God desire to answer our prayer much more than we do..we dun have to nag at Him,He just wants us to know His heart..
2Cor1:19bbut in him it has always been "Yes." 20For no matter how many promises God has made, they are "Yes" in Christ. And so through him the "Amen" is spoken by us to the glory of God..=)
learnt abt prayer at dcltp.. one thing that was shared was on persistent prayer.. persistent prayer is more than just keep repeating our requests to God, it is through the prayer to seek God , to know more about God's heartbeat..
Was just thinking, sometimes i'm quite 'persistent' in my prayer..in the sense, if my prayer was unanswered, i keep praying for the same thing.. like nagging at God..but forgetting to ask God about His opinion about my request, forgetting to spend time to listen to Him...
learnt that God desire to answer our prayer much more than we do..we dun have to nag at Him,He just wants us to know His heart..
2Cor1:19bbut in him it has always been "Yes." 20For no matter how many promises God has made, they are "Yes" in Christ. And so through him the "Amen" is spoken by us to the glory of God..=)
Sunday, March 19, 2006
Saya baru menonton cartoon, Mcdull.. ha film itu sederhana,benar benar sederhana, saya berpikir..
kalau satu orang mudah puas, mungkin dia tidak akan ada banyak masalah,
kalau satu orang tidak terlalu penuli apa yang dipikir untuk orang-orang yang lain, mungkin dia akan lebih senang..Seperti dalam dunia anak anak? Tidak tahu.. karena anak anak di jaman modern tidak seperti anak anak yang lalu..dunia akan berubar..masyarakat juga akan berubar..
ha hanya satu cartoon,istirahat dalam mimpi... =P
kalau satu orang mudah puas, mungkin dia tidak akan ada banyak masalah,
kalau satu orang tidak terlalu penuli apa yang dipikir untuk orang-orang yang lain, mungkin dia akan lebih senang..Seperti dalam dunia anak anak? Tidak tahu.. karena anak anak di jaman modern tidak seperti anak anak yang lalu..dunia akan berubar..masyarakat juga akan berubar..
ha hanya satu cartoon,istirahat dalam mimpi... =P
Wednesday, February 22, 2006
Lunch at Pak Chomot, ayam bakar, achar,sup, nasi putih
Interviewing a reporter at Batam Pos
DJ Ginta in action at Batam FM
Went Batam yesterday with my bahasa indo classmates.. it's a tiring but enriching experience..=) It did not turn out as bad as i thought that it will be..b4 going was quite apprehensive..then also a bit 'complainy' cos was thinking one day of the mid term will already be taken away.. which means lesser time to do the stuff tt i am suppose to do..In addition, the thought of interviewing the natives with my 'half-bucket' indo n when i come bck, hav to do up a report n presentation doesn't help me look at the situation any better..But thank God the trip went well..managed to interview quite a no. of ppl, a pekerja rumah tangga (think like housekeeper like tt) and DJ from batam FM, a reporter, a photographer and a printing worker from Batam Pos.. we really had a tough time catching wat they say cos they talk quite fast.. if not is we have limited vocab.. the words that they used are too 'chim' for us to understand.. ha but think the feeling is mutual.. they had a hard time figuring out wat we want to say also.. think it's an interesting experience cos seldom has the chance to c a DJ in actn n be able to talk n interview them up-close..
So went radio station there, newspaper press then got to shop a bit too.. our group v cute.. most ppl are shopping for clothes, doing manicures(oh manicures n pedicures there are v cheap only 7 bucks wor.) but our group spent the most time shopping in the supermarket for food to bring home..two grp members even lug a heavy bag of buah salat (snake skin fruit) bck.. think we all quite family-oriented.. i bought kueh lapis at the request of my dad hee too xiao4 jin4 him..Thank God for him! had to reach habour front by 7.30am on tt day n he fetched me there.. in addition, he fetched me bck home also..if he din fetch me, in the mornign think will hv to leave home by 6am le.. then when i come bck quite tired n got a little seasick..so glad tt he came to fetch me home.. =)
Yeah.. jadi, pengalaman di Batam akan tak terlupakan..=)
Wednesday, February 01, 2006
Been quite a while since i last updated this blog le.. cos actually not much time since school starts.. Modules that i take just 'zoomed into action' since the first week..so the past few weeks have been quite busy too..though it's like it's just the starting of the sem..(hmm reminiscing the times when i was in year one..haha)..
So the CNY hols is really a good time of break and rest for me..=) It has been such a long time since i do not have to set alarm clock and can sleep to my heart's content.. hahaha =P Then, think really ate a lot over the past few days, so much so that i don't know what meal i'm eating..haha it's like i'm eating for the whole day.. though i'm full le but will still eat a little..cos thinking that they took all the trouble to cook and it's not very nice if i don't eat..behind every meal which is prepared really involves alot of hard work and the person's heart to want to bless others..thought of this because really touched by my grandma.. On the first day of CNY, she woke up at 5am to start preparing the spread of food for us.. i was like whoa.. 5am.. all the way till like 12pm, she is still busy in the kitchen, drenched with sweat..while we are donning new clothes..then she will ensure that we are well-fed, taken care of before she eats..so blessed by her..then this also helps me to really think twice before i complain about my mum's cooking in future, at times tend to take her efforts for granted..=P
ya.. then besides the usual house visitation.. went to watch movies too.. watched 'fearless' with my family and 'memoirs of geisha' with the sisters..Hmm..'fearless' haha , if not for my dad who is a kung fu movie buff, i don't think i will want to watch this movie at all..=P kung fu movies just doesn't seem very appealing to me.. but in the end, find that the show turns out to be quite good..the fighting scenes are quite engaging..hmm..then like it cos at least it's not senseless fighting but there's a lesson to learn from the show.. like the part when it's mentioned that the enemy is normally ourself.. think quite true.. many times, it's ourself or our own thoughts that are hard to overcome..though the plot is predictable, showing hw Jet Li was initially a very prideful and self centered person, but a series of setbacks caused him to realise the importance of humility..watching it in a movie may find it quite cliche but think it's also the case for reality ba..there is bound to be some blindspots in our lives which we are unaware of until something happens to illuminate it..=)hee think God showed me alot of my character flaws as well using circumstances..though struggled a lot at times, but thank God for tt too.. so that i can see clearer what am i like actually..
hmm as for 'memoirs of geisha'.. i wanted to watch this film for v v v long.. yest finally watched it.. though previously already received comments that it's not a very nice show..but still want to see it for myself..Hmm.. find the show ok.. did not leave a v deep impression..then find the movie seems to be focusing a lot on the mizuage part..and little on the skills which a geisha has..ya..oh think gong li really acted quite well in the show.. then i find the little girl who acts as chiyo very pretty and cute..=)
hmm.. nxt show i want to watch is.. i not stupid too..but maybe will wait for vcd..=)
So the CNY hols is really a good time of break and rest for me..=) It has been such a long time since i do not have to set alarm clock and can sleep to my heart's content.. hahaha =P Then, think really ate a lot over the past few days, so much so that i don't know what meal i'm eating..haha it's like i'm eating for the whole day.. though i'm full le but will still eat a little..cos thinking that they took all the trouble to cook and it's not very nice if i don't eat..behind every meal which is prepared really involves alot of hard work and the person's heart to want to bless others..thought of this because really touched by my grandma.. On the first day of CNY, she woke up at 5am to start preparing the spread of food for us.. i was like whoa.. 5am.. all the way till like 12pm, she is still busy in the kitchen, drenched with sweat..while we are donning new clothes..then she will ensure that we are well-fed, taken care of before she eats..so blessed by her..then this also helps me to really think twice before i complain about my mum's cooking in future, at times tend to take her efforts for granted..=P
ya.. then besides the usual house visitation.. went to watch movies too.. watched 'fearless' with my family and 'memoirs of geisha' with the sisters..Hmm..'fearless' haha , if not for my dad who is a kung fu movie buff, i don't think i will want to watch this movie at all..=P kung fu movies just doesn't seem very appealing to me.. but in the end, find that the show turns out to be quite good..the fighting scenes are quite engaging..hmm..then like it cos at least it's not senseless fighting but there's a lesson to learn from the show.. like the part when it's mentioned that the enemy is normally ourself.. think quite true.. many times, it's ourself or our own thoughts that are hard to overcome..though the plot is predictable, showing hw Jet Li was initially a very prideful and self centered person, but a series of setbacks caused him to realise the importance of humility..watching it in a movie may find it quite cliche but think it's also the case for reality ba..there is bound to be some blindspots in our lives which we are unaware of until something happens to illuminate it..=)hee think God showed me alot of my character flaws as well using circumstances..though struggled a lot at times, but thank God for tt too.. so that i can see clearer what am i like actually..
hmm as for 'memoirs of geisha'.. i wanted to watch this film for v v v long.. yest finally watched it.. though previously already received comments that it's not a very nice show..but still want to see it for myself..Hmm.. find the show ok.. did not leave a v deep impression..then find the movie seems to be focusing a lot on the mizuage part..and little on the skills which a geisha has..ya..oh think gong li really acted quite well in the show.. then i find the little girl who acts as chiyo very pretty and cute..=)
hmm.. nxt show i want to watch is.. i not stupid too..but maybe will wait for vcd..=)
Sunday, January 01, 2006
Happy New Year!! Welcome year 2006!!
It's the end of year 2005...
Went back to my blog archive to have a look on my resolutions'05..
1)will finish reading old t by January.. then remember more verses and when reading bible.. think have to spend more time meditating.. cos now i often just scan through the whole thing without understanding or thinking..oops..=P
2)to be able to becum a sheppy
3)to exercise more.. ha.. din keep to my schedule..
4)to improve/maintain my results in study
5)to build deeper r/s with my family n be a salt n light at home, to be able to share to them boldly..
Think out of the 5, managed to sorta fulfill 2..Thank God for tt.. I'ts really by His grace..haha cos by myself hard to fulfill any..=P
1) Finished reading the whole bible once think sometime around the early part of the year.. though is really skimming thru.. but towards the later half of the year.. started reading old t n new t concurrently again.. to better understand and for application..Then, wanted to remember more verses, God just put me in M n M com.. which provided me with an opportunity and motivation to really think thru some verses in the bible and see how they can be applied in my life, in my bro n sis lives..
2)Year 2005.. on 8th Aug, witness a fren crossed the line and be reconciled with God..First time witnessing the salvation of a fren.. n the joy is really hard to describe!!Remembered that on that nite just cannot stop smiling.. =) Been taking care of this dear fren for 3mths le.. Glad to see her heart to want to experience God..
3) Exercise.. hmm din keep to it.. as usual..=P but did quite some unusual stuff this year.. eg: First time running outside my house.. from my house to Marsiling MRT Station haha n the last time in 2005 as well..=P
Then, first time walking >11km .. went Macritchie Tree top trail.. think covered the whole reservoir,walked for ard 5+ hrs..
4) Studies wise.. year 2005 modules were harder.. caps dropped but thank God it's still quite good..
5) Family wise.. think there is still room for improvements.. some struggles are still there.. but one breakthru is the assurance of my love for my parents thru a letter..
Year 2005.. can only remember the later part of the year starting from Jun..really cannot rmb much abt the earlier part.. maybe what happened after Jun is too much tt it overshadowed what happened earlier..=)Later part of the year holds many 'first times' for me.. first time leading worship, first time taking care of ppl etc.. different experiences , different memories..=)
It's the end of year 2005...
Went back to my blog archive to have a look on my resolutions'05..
1)will finish reading old t by January.. then remember more verses and when reading bible.. think have to spend more time meditating.. cos now i often just scan through the whole thing without understanding or thinking..oops..=P
2)to be able to becum a sheppy
3)to exercise more.. ha.. din keep to my schedule..
4)to improve/maintain my results in study
5)to build deeper r/s with my family n be a salt n light at home, to be able to share to them boldly..
Think out of the 5, managed to sorta fulfill 2..Thank God for tt.. I'ts really by His grace..haha cos by myself hard to fulfill any..=P
1) Finished reading the whole bible once think sometime around the early part of the year.. though is really skimming thru.. but towards the later half of the year.. started reading old t n new t concurrently again.. to better understand and for application..Then, wanted to remember more verses, God just put me in M n M com.. which provided me with an opportunity and motivation to really think thru some verses in the bible and see how they can be applied in my life, in my bro n sis lives..
2)Year 2005.. on 8th Aug, witness a fren crossed the line and be reconciled with God..First time witnessing the salvation of a fren.. n the joy is really hard to describe!!Remembered that on that nite just cannot stop smiling.. =) Been taking care of this dear fren for 3mths le.. Glad to see her heart to want to experience God..
3) Exercise.. hmm din keep to it.. as usual..=P but did quite some unusual stuff this year.. eg: First time running outside my house.. from my house to Marsiling MRT Station haha n the last time in 2005 as well..=P
Then, first time walking >11km .. went Macritchie Tree top trail.. think covered the whole reservoir,walked for ard 5+ hrs..
4) Studies wise.. year 2005 modules were harder.. caps dropped but thank God it's still quite good..
5) Family wise.. think there is still room for improvements.. some struggles are still there.. but one breakthru is the assurance of my love for my parents thru a letter..
Year 2005.. can only remember the later part of the year starting from Jun..really cannot rmb much abt the earlier part.. maybe what happened after Jun is too much tt it overshadowed what happened earlier..=)Later part of the year holds many 'first times' for me.. first time leading worship, first time taking care of ppl etc.. different experiences , different memories..=)
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