"Radio 2, come up and get me"

Life imitates throwaway lines: In order to plug the gap caused by Jonathan Ross being re-educated, Danny Baker is joining Radio 2. For a month, but perhaps someone might spot that it might make sense for him to be there permanently.

He's being paired with Zoe Ball - if we've learned one thing from Brand and Ross's adventures, it's that you don't need to worry, providing you have two presenters on a programme. This actually sounds quite promising; Baker works well with a partner and Zoe's best work comes when she's talking with, rather than to. It almost makes you hope that the Mail On Sunday gets Ross suspended for another six months.

Darkness at 3AM: Facing up to Norman Cook

They really do have trouble making 3AM work online, don't they? They've had a bit of a shuffle around again this morning, but it still doesn't quite work - some of the stories now have teasers, but others are still just a linked headline - Linds Lured, anyone?

The column marks the 25th anniversary of Mixmag with, erm, an anecdote:

Fatboy Slim certainly won't forget the day his head was on the front cover - superimposed on another man's buff body. An insider said: "His missus Zoe's gay mates all thought he was gay... He looked so fit!"

What sort of quote is that? It implies that Zoe Ball has gay friends but Norman Cook doesn't, for a start. Or perhaps it just means that only Zoe's gay friends are incapable of spotting a playful bit of photoshopping. And why would a gay man assume a person is gay because he's had his face photoshopped onto someone else's body? Do the 3AM Girls really think there are gay men who are that dim?

DJobit: Kevin Greening

The former Radio One breakfast show presenter Kevin Greening has died.

The manager of the 44 year-old said Greening died "peacefully" in his sleep, but gave no further details.

Greening would claim that his start in broadcasting came editing tapes for Checkpoint and Roger Cook, but his route to Radio One was more traditional - after a stint on BBC Radio Solent, he joined GLR at a time when the London station was at its sharpest. A brief stint at the start-up Virgin Radio was followed by the move to Radio One in 1993.

Something of an acquired taste - Greening's show was one of the last to employ comedy voices and characters (Raymond Sinclair, Major Hold-ups), making him like an erudite Steve Wright - his career highpoint came when Matthew Bannister was rushing to correct the fall-out from the Radcliffe and Lard breakfast experiment. He was thrown into a double act with Zoe Ball on breakfast, providing the radio experience to partner with Ball's high profile. The partnership lasted only until Ball started to gain in confidence, then Greening was cut free and floated about the schedules until his contract expired in early New Year, 2000.

There followed a long period where Greening struggled to find a permanent niche - a year at Five Live; some time at London Live (the renamed GLR) where he found himself playing the same role with Amanda Hussein as he did with Zoe Ball at Radio One; Jazz FM, Heart; a surprisingly successful stint at Xfm before winding up at Smooth in London. Greening's trouble was he was a man who had a unique style at a time when commercial radio is obsessed with smoothing out any sign of individuality; he was, effectively, out of the time when he would have flourished.

Kylie tries to move in; house prices rocket; whole area could blow sky-high

Kylie Minogue is, apparently, thinking of following in Julie Burchill's shoes. No, no, not Tony Parsons. Moving to Brighton, along the seafront. Shoreham, actually. Quite near Zoe Ball and Norman Cook, in fact, and the recently vacated home of Heather Mills.

Sadly, it's also near a proposed store for chemical fertilizers, like the ones they were going to use to blow all symbols of the louche Western sin-society up with the other year.

Kirstie and Phil would suggest this an excellent bargaining chip to get some movement on the price. If you don't mind the risk of dock worker body parts raining down on your exclusive sun terrace at some point in the future.

Having been born in Brighton, I still can't quite get used to the idea of Shoreham being talked about as a cool, groovy, property hotspot. Good for second hand car parts and chips, yes, but home to genuine pop royalty? Isn't that Kemp Town's job?

X-Factor: How many judges does it take to replace Louis Walsh?

Quite a few, it seems. The People is confident that Dannii Minogue is going to take the role. While sister paper >the Daily Record says it'll be David Gest. Although he'll have to sit on Leona Lewis' lap, if the Daily Star is to believed. Unless you prefer to believe it'll be Jessica Simpson, tipped by, erm the Daily Star. Or it might be Zoe Ball or Cat Deeley, if you listen to the Daily Star. But at least we know it won't be Cheryl Tweedy, as she's turned down the offer - leaving the way open for EntertainmentWise's favoured candidate, Mel B. Assuming they can fit her and Chris Moyles on the table, as Metro says he'll be on the panel.

We're sure it'll wind up being Robson and Jerome, to be honest.

Our faith in love is diminished. Slightly

We're sad to hear that Zoe and Norman are on a break - presumably the dressing up as an elephant for Reeves and Mortimer was the final straw - and we wouldn't normally mention it (unless it was a really slow news day) except for the curious grasp of fact Ananova are showing here, reporting that the couple are apart, but both apparently in the same house. Except Zoe, who's living simultaneously in Brighton AND London. That really is the sort of complication that can cause trouble in a marriage.

We hope you guys can sort it out.