Only fools and horses: Dappy takes a tumble

I'm sure all our thoughts and prayers are with Dappy, who cannot ride a horse:

Dappy's representative, Terry Mills, says, “I can confirm that my client was involved in a horse riding accident at home where he fell from his horse and was subsequently kicked in the face.

“Dappy was rushed to hospital where he received medical treatment and is now recovering.”

It does appear that, although Mills doesn't make it clear, Dappy's face-kicking came from the horse; it's not like someone saw him fall off the horse and thought 'well, that's an open goal'.

No word on how the horse is.

It's unclear if this is going to cause Dappy to have to cancel any work he has coming up. Actually, it's unclear what Dappy is actually doing these days when he hasn't been kicked in the face by a horse.

Madonna facts straightened a little

Despite Madonna's team's claims that the Adopt-o-matic had fallen off her horse when evil photographers startled her horse, the official police report somehow makes no mention of any third party being involved.

And the police seem convinced there was no boogerman-snapper, either:

And now local police Sgt Herbert Johnson reveals there was no mention of a photographer in the police report Madonna filed.
He tells TMZ.com, "There is no mention of photographers. It's a matter of spin control that went out of control. If they felt there was something else, they would have written 'paparazzi' in the form."

The paparazzi are odious enough; you don't need to make things up about them. And there's no shame in falling off a horse.

Another horse rejects Madonna

The last time Madonna was thrown from a horse, you'll recall, The Sun insisted that it doomed her marriage. Who knows what horrific new era, then, will be ushered in by another horse deciding it doesn't want her on his back.

The blame, of course, is being put on the press:

According to her spokeswoman, the 50-year-old singer fell when her horse was "startled by paparazzi who jumped out of the bushes" to photograph her.

Which is disgusting if true, although does sound a little like Liz Rosenberg might have added a dramatic element to the storyline.