Noel Gallagher is worse than his brother at fashion

To be honest, we'd assumed that Pretty Green set the bar so high for 'terrible Oasis related fashion activity' that it was a record which would never be beaten. Like Seb Coe's 800 metres in 1981, it looked like we'd found a marker in human endeavour that would endure.

But like Seb Coe's record, nothing lasts forever.

There's something worse just round the corner:

Noel Gallagher has partnered with Adidas for a new signature shoe.

The former Oasis guitarist has designed his version of the Garwen SPZL trainers as part of Adidas’ 2017 spring SPEZIAL range.

Hang on a moment, though. It's not just Noel Gallagher Has Designed A Plimsole. Because that would be worthy of being terrible in its own right. But it's the design he's come up with that really lifts this to 'world-beatingly godawful':

The shoe comes in indigo leather and is said to be 70s-inspired, featuring a picture of Noel on the shoe’s tongue and his date of birth inside.

Ninety Nine Pounds. For a shoe that only really functions as a way that Liam can remember when he's meant to send Noel a birthday card.

Some of the Adidas celeb tie-ups now are so bad, I suspect they're just an elaborate trolling activity on the part of a company which has frankly grown bored of fiddling with the sleeve length on football jerseys.

Gordon in the morning: Noel Gallagher, shoegazing

The news that Noel Gallagher has "designed" a pair of plimsols for Adidas is neither here nor there:

The former Oasis star is releasing 120 pairs of limited edition Adidas trainers in a couple of weeks' time.

If you are lucky enough to beat the queue at the only shop they are going on sale, Adidas on Newburgh St, London, they will set you back £80.

It's all a contractual arrangement, part of the deal which got Noel to shill from the shoe company last year, but the few they're making, coupled with the bargain basement price gives this the air of "the least I could do."

But the caption on the photo doesn't even have that much engagement:

Ex-shoe-lent ... Noel Gallagher

Ex shoe lent? Ex shoe lent? Are they implying that someone has borrowed Gallagher's old shoes?