So fierce...
Why u so fierce...pout...........
Cry...
Wednesday, December 29, 2004
Tuesday, December 28, 2004
Shoppin day
Today went shoppin~
My poor poor legs.....haha........at first is meet raymond to go shop one.......but we were at bugis...then my mum and sis went bugis too~!~!~!
Cuz my sis called me ma......so no choice lor..........me and raymond went to sakae to eat becuz to avoid being seen...and also cuz raymond he hungry.......then i was so worried i cried.......then raymond v nice...........hugs~......He make me laugh...haha.....wif all his lame-o jokes...haha...real lame.....we are the laming couple~....haha...oh ya hor.......he fractured his foot...my foot also not good...haha...ya...lame...
Anywae...so in the end he went home...and i go meet my mum and sis...later me and my sis keep quarrellin badly..haha...but all for the sake of my mum la...we teng her...haha....ah well....but being sisters...we quarrelled bad....but we patch up fast too...Then my mum bought a top...v nice..pink pink.....$43...then got a very nice bottom...a skirt to match..........it's black base wif pink/black/white flowers to match...and a black lace at the waistline.........VERY nice....but it's $69......then my mum refused to buy......even when we offered to buy for her....then she and my sis had an argument...haha....ah well.......in the end....we went to Plaze Sing...cuz my sis wanna see phone and my mum wanna buy this top from Samuel and Kelvin......it's $9........-_-" it's nice la...but ah well.......not v v v nice....
Then we went to Double Index.. then i bought a regular deep green...bright one la...and a bright yellow sleeveless top...haha..my mum choose one...not bad...and she chose this nice short black skirt..haha..very sweet one...so i'm wearin a bright yellow top and a black skirt for new yr...........so like a BumbleBee~...............And a black top like wat my sis had...she hav a grey one....haha...........then we both realised tt we were wearin Double Index tops to buy MORE Double Index stuff....
Then got this Black dress....it's a black tube attached to a skirt which is got foldings and slightly big big one............as in...........aiyoh.........like those cute skool gurl skirt.....wif fold...............big folds.........
it's very cute and nice~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
But it's $59.90...and my mum and sis say i regular time cannot wear........then wear to new yr also cannot...pluz so ex......................i was SO SO SO SO upset i nearly cry.......the eyes wet wet one.................then the rest of the day i feel like a rebellious kid who want to yell and complain........SERIOUS~..........
But ah well.......i comforted myself by decidin tt i shall let u all see can liao..........yup.........
Monday, December 27, 2004
My new blogskins
Yippee dooo..... Tada~ My VERY own created blogskin...haha.....
Of cuz...i aint no regular or expert...me still rookie...so i merely copied other pple's work and adapt and edit them..
Promise tt next time...i will make my very very own................yup........
By the way...chose this background becuz of special reason....
*wink*
Raymond if u dun find it familiar.....*eyes narrow...* Somethin.........is....wrong.......somewhere......
Sian
Now in a super sian mode.....dun realli wanna talk....maybe cry too much the eyes very tired....
P.S....cuz me was watchin Naruto~.........So sad~~~~~~~~~
Tinkin of goin out today......but then becum super sian......dunno if shld go out........so hot........lost the mood.........
My mood and facial expression now is -_-
Sunday, December 26, 2004
I'm damn angry
No...i'm not sad over the results....i'm so damn angry....
At who or wat i'm not sure....
Just damn angry.........
Dammit....I REFUSED to believe i'm not good at studies......I REFUSED TO ACCEPT IT...
Argh~.....Next sem i will prove it.......i'll show the world....(as if they care in the first place...)
I'll show them that i'm not good for nothing..............i'll show them that when you think of Tan Yun Xian...you'll NOT think of remedials......extra lessons......fails.........just pass..........struggling with work..........the one where ppl will NOT turn to when they have things they dunno....etc......
I'll show them the Yun Xian who scores and the Yun Xian who used to be top ten....The one who get As.....
Dammit.............I'll show them....
Sad sia....My lit~~
Module Code Module Title Grade
CL1101E INTRODUCTION TO CHINESE LANGUAGE B-
EN1101E AN INTRODUCTION TO LITERARY STUDIES C
GEK1503 CHEMISTRY IN SPACE C+
SW1101E INTRODUCTION TO SOCIAL WORK B
TS1101E INTRODUCTION TO THEATRE AND DRAMA B-
CAP: 2.8
Results Day..
Today is the day i'll noe my results for my first uni exams.....
Kao....i juz wish i can pass....at least a B....if C i'll gek but ah well.......A i'll go crazy.......D i'll cry like crazy.....the rest pls dun say anymore...
Ya...haha..anywae...wateva it is....i planned to study harder next sem....
Sian...recently realised everybody very happenin this hol...i seems to be the only one slacking at home besides the army guys....who also seems to be having fun anywae....i mean.............i'm stayin at home on Christmas Eve....eatin the orange side of the roof of my gingerbread hse....
Which is simply delicious....do put M n M's and less icing sugar (too sweet for me) nxt time...it's a great go-together...
Anywae...and where's my siblings? Out enjoyin wif their frens and bf at orchard and who noes where....until 1am still not home yet.....
Why i noe? becuz i was half playin gunbound wif raymond...half doin the swaps webby....until 12mn.....then i realised i entered Christmas with my work~!~!
Anywae...the Christmas is spent eatin one of the window of the gingerbread hse.....the one wif two red gummy bears.....delicious....but i juz simply cannot eat more than one piece..........too sweet....and i also spent the day playin games.............
As well as doin the webby....haha...ah well....currently no progress except for the main page...
-_-" Lazy me...haha....
Anywae...today is results day....and my mum suddenly burst into my room at 8.30am and exclaimed...."Earthquake~!" then i groggily got up to see her makin frantic phonecalls......and my bro sittin on the chair lookin amused....
I stared at the fishtank (By the way...my dad juz bought fishes....haha..5 goldfishes~!~! 4 gold and 1 black...) where the water is shakin to and fro vigorously....
Then i hav a debate wif my mum and bro who insist tt they feel it badly......
i cant feel much sia.........the other times was worse....ah well....still...i msged raymond cuz seein the fish tank shake by itself is creepy...
Then i made a quick SOS prayer to God to guide and protect whoeva and whicheva country is undergoin earthquake.......
Ya....in one more hour....i'll noe my results...Dammit....
Oh ya....currently watchin Naruto~~~~~~~~~~~
It's so nice and funny.....bout Ninjas la.....twelve yrs olds ninjas...haha..........very shiok...saw the toys at the toy shop at plaza singapore the other time when went to watch Phantom.......haha.....
Kage Bunshin no Jutsu~~
Tt's one of the ninja spell...not realli spell la...the skill...
Friday, December 24, 2004
Thursday, December 23, 2004
Phantom of Opera
Today went to xm's hse and made my very own gingerbread hse!!~!~
Ok la....i merely decorated.......her mum baked the gingerbread...and raymond fixed the hse for me.......
Then i Ap-ed raymond when he tryin to help me wrap the hse.....Sorry~~ *take a bow*.......me was tired and hungry and hence easily irritated.....then somemore i was tryin to be "funny" and trying to look more annoyed than i actually was......if i was in the first place...
Sorry...
Then later me raymond and dajie took a cab down to PS to meet XueZhen and Pandora to watch THE PHANTOM OF THE OPERA......then later me and raymond went Mos Burger to eat.....Cuz i simply cannot resist the corn soup...........cuz raymond wanna draw money ma......the atm beside the mos burger.....
Anywae...then we met JinHui there....yup...anywae...the other 3 ladies was at mac.........then later the 5 of us walked ard lookin at toys/clothes/sunglasses and bikinis....and since raymond and i not interested in bikinis...haha...we stood outside the store chattin....
Anywae...then we went to watch the movie....and met Itchy and i think Jean.....haha...scandalous.......
Then the Movie is nice wor...................very sad.....the ending..........cry like siao..........then the part where Christine and Raoul singin tt "All I ask of You"......then i hugged raymond....^_^.....Even tho tt position will make me cant realli see the movie........i decided juz hear can liao.......
Then later tt position is givin me backaches...so we resume our normal seatings.....
Then after movie........the 3 ladies dunno go where......then me and raymond took mrt home.....then i kept singin songs to him......
A desperate Attempt (note the capital "A") to prove tt I can sing that too~~~~
Hahaha.......anywae....had fun........but i'm so darn tired.........
Phantom of the Opera
http://vnichellemc.tripod.com/phantomoftheopera.html
The whole script i think...real cool.....................
Billy Boyd
Once again~....I have to drag his name out..........
Ah~~~~ he's too shuai le.......so cute~~~~ and his voice....oh my goodness....but i guess i like Pippin more la....haha......it's so so so so so so so DAMN cute~~~~~~~
Ah well....he's cool....a strong tenor and light baritone.....got a Diploma in Dramatic Arts...
Ah well....i like his accent...
And...pls go to the billyboyd webbie.. http://www.billyboyd.net/ and inside there...under the link "Update"....u scroll all the way down......got a link called "That Swing Thing!!"....there is a link there where u can see a short clip of Billy's performance of "Beyond the Sea" (the one Robbie Williams sang for Finding Nemo) with big band for the Children's Classic Concerts.........
Very nice~~~~
Sunday, December 19, 2004
My way to Bethlehem Part 2
Anywae...the dad's way reminded me of mine...
You see...i came from Christian schools...My nursery was spent in a Buddhist school..Pu Hui Kindergarden...doesnt remember much...except that i fell down while playin on a tyre swing and got sand in my eyes....and also i did a dance for my graduation performance...it was taped down...u guys wan can come my hse watch..i was cute....and danced everythin wrongly...and when i was dancin correctly...everyone was dancin wrongly....so i looked as if i was terribly wrong...
Anywae..nxt i went to a Christian school...Tung Ling Kindergarden...there..i cant remember much.......except my finger got pricked by a very beautiful flower...cant remember wat is called...u noe..the one u put inside a red colour dye...and the flower will turned tt colour??......ah well....ya......my finger was hooked by the thorn...i cant pull it out.....haha....
It was here that i learnt the english word for blood.....cuz my fren's lips got blood...i was tryin to tell her....end up i was tellin her.....red red....then she was like..."wat?"..then she touched her lips...then she went "Oh....Blood la..".....ya...
It was here also tt i cried becuz i forgot to say my prayers before eating my cup of tou hua shui.....cuz i love tou hua shui...so i began eatin....then my whole row of classmates looked at me in horror and said "hor~~~~~~~~~~~~~" in the accusing way...and i cried.....then the teachers have to comfort me....
And i remember my first time on a proper stage....of Victoria Theatre...not the concert hall hor~.....i was acting as Mary...the first one to found Jesus' body gone.....and go off (i'm supposed to run in a big circle....grabbed these two other gals at the side of the stage...and run out to the centre of the stage again....)
Anywae...in primary and secondary school...i was in a Methodist school....and one day when i was Pri 4....i prayed one day tt "If you are real..then show yourself to me.." it was one of those afterthought after my grandfather died suddenly that yr......and of cuz...God didnt exactly poof in front of me....
But the next day....during assembly...we have those sessions where a teacher or pastor etc comes to preach to us la....then the topic was...."Why dun we see God in person.." Honestly...i was very shocked.....cuz they were sayin like...why issit we cannot see God.....then the explanation was somethin like it's cuz we are imperfect and God is perfect.....
Or somethin like tt la....
Cant realli remember...but i remember the explanations were very satisfactory to me...vey convincin.....and i immediately gave myself to Him....honestly.......i was shocked......in a..."Oh my goodness way..."
Then of cuz...in subsequent yrs...there are many a times where God answered my prayers in the sense tt He granted most of my prayers..........until recently dun have la....
And bout last yr or somethin...i read somewhere tt initially...
we are BABY christians...and so to help us strengthen our faith......God granted all our petty wishes.......
then when we grew older spiritually.....He began to train us like a doting father.....
Wincin each time we fall...and get hurt and cry.......and hugged us whenever we run to Him crying......Rejoicing each time we stood up and grew stronger....puttin more and more difficult obstacles infront of us.....and yet givin us the strength and wisdom to overcome them etc....
After all....isnt there a phrase tt highlight to us that God WILL NOT put anythin on our shoulders heavier than we can bear......
IE......wateva tests He put in our lives.......He know we can handle it......as long as we try........even when we despair and see no solution....He'll always be there to point out the road for us..........
After all...He's in the past present and future.........He KNEW and KNOW wat will happen....
Again and again remindin us that we aint God...we aint perfect....we aint all-wonder......and so we cant do all things by ourselves....
Unlike what many atheists i know tt said tt "In life...you depend on no one but urself..."
Realli?.......Who are you in the first place...You are but a small lil creation....How did u come about in the first place...Everythin has beginnin...and honestly i believed in the Big Bang theory....
It is tt Universe was realli tiny and small...and one day it expanded....and by Enstein's theory of E=MC sq and Wein's Law....Matter began to form...these includes our lil proton and neutron......and becuz the universe is expandin....the temp begans to drop (Wein's Law) and intense radiation began to decrease until now......
But impt is tt all these took place within mins...and the diff stars and planets began to form....everythin is a cycle...one leadin to another....one star die...becom dust....and the dust compile and became another star.......
So honestly...i believed tt he did created us....why not? no scientist can explain how the universe exist in the first place~.......
Anywae......honestly...there are pple who fear gettin punished by their Gods becuz they forget to offer a pleasin offerin.....or becuz they ate beef on the God's bdae.....(can u believe it...God's bdae??) And there are those who worship other stuff like the rocks or sky or somethin.......i mean..........come on la......u are all worshippin the Creations and not the Creator....(this comes from dajie's bible studies...)
Honestly...i pray and thank God for being with me...He is different....He focus on our growth...and our relationship wif him...not our offerins....or the first joss-sticks placed in the urn on the bdae....He wan us to grow....and not focuz in punishin.....why not? why not punish when we do wrong??
Becuz Christ died for our sins.....and hence God forgave and forgives still......
Read this in the Daily Bread article....
that a tribe leader was faced with a lot of problems esp regardin the stealin of food from the store (or somethin..)
hence he threatened wif many strokes...and keep increasin the number of strokes when the culprit continues and does not get scared by the threat...all the way til the number of strokes declared is so much tt it wll definitely results in death...
.Finally....the culprit was caught.....it was his mother.....and being the Tribe leader....he cannot take back his words...the punishments still have to be carried out...
But the difference is...He declared...as a tribe leader...he gave the order for the whippin to be carried out....but as the son.....he stood infront of the mother...and took all the whippin...
In the similar but much greater way...God...being all perfect...has to punish us for our sins.....and yes.....we ALL have sins......and yet.....bein our father...........He cannot bear to see us like this....and hence.....he sent Jesus down to us...and die in our place............
Point to note...Jesus is God and God is Jesus and they are the Holy Spirit as well...
Trinity sia...........it's like water can be ice, water, and water vapour....
Hence...he gave the verdict tt the punishment is Death...Hell....for eternally not be able to be united with God..........and u noe wat..........he took the punishment in our place......He died for us.......a painful and horrible death........
Okay...which so-called God in the entire world of religions do this for you?
I've read the story...the fulfilment of the prophesy dating all the way back in history....the prophecy tt the savior will come......
I've seen God's miracles....juz see the risin of the morn sun...how issit it can bring such joy to ur heart sometimes?....
I've FELT Him..............i feel Him...and i feel his love...and his embraces.........i hear his voice..........
i saw how He have a hand in all the things in my life..........the things and ppl He have arranged in my life....secretly puttin them in place......
.for God is a proud God....for He have every reason to be!! He is the creation of all things....And yet He is a humble God as well...He doesnt go...."Tada.......look~ I made it......lalala...u cant do it..i made it....lalala.."
It will be quite idiotic if He eva do tt....and of cuz....He doesnt........and He doesnt need to...
God is always there...openin His arms...waitin for us.......
He is the Architect, the designer...the creator...the poet...the artist...the engineer...the historian...the prophet...the musician...the singer...the scientist....the creator...the God.....
and we are created to be like Him..........tat's why there are so many of us with these talents tt God have.........We creates things too...though it's blessed by His wisdom...
and there are many of us.....who WAN to be GOD as well.......that's why ppl wan power....be it those zip zip zoom power.....the superhero power.......the political power..........the power as a king........the power of money.........the power of controllin our own lives.............
We desires to be like Him........in many ways tt we dun noe................I wonder if God feels how silly we are........for it is written.........."Ask and it shall be given.......Seek and you shall find....."
In other words........God is sayin........"Eh.................so..........wat's the problem here? Juz ask me la..."
So let's just ask.......for God answer prayer......the answer may be a Yes or a No...........it may be long term and short term..........all we have to do is ask.........somethin like..."God...i believe...and i wan u to be in my life...and help me....and walk wif me....amen..."
After...no standard request la.....God is Creative.....juz add in a couple of you......things tt onli you say....haha............think he will like........^_^....He's quite funny one u noe...God wif humour......think onli He laugh at my lames jokes....Daddy hor? *nudge nudge....*....wat.........wat u mean they are very lame.....haha....ah well...shrugs....
My way to Bethlehem..
Read this article in ChristianityToday.Com....it's talkin bout the famous story of Christmas....
And no...it's not the Santa Claus and Rudolph....wonder where it comes from....Just like how is the Easter Bunny and Easter Egg has to do wif the cruxifiction of Christ?
Anywae..here is the article...i took the liberty to cut and paste....pls do go to the webby to read...it answers lotsa qns for Christians and non-Christians..
The Way to Bethlehem
The figurines in my nativity set were drawn to the Christ child for different reasons, but God called them all.
By Elesha Coffman
While I unpacked Christmas decorations last year, I found a stranger in a terra cotta nativity set. Tucked away with the familiar characters and tiny animals was a figure of a little girl, kneeling. How did she get here? I wondered.
I laid the little girl aside as I began to arrange the other characters. The question stayed with me, though. Because I knew the Christmas story inside and out, it always seemed inevitable, but in some ways it's just strange. How did such an odd assemblage of people get to Bethlehem that night so long ago? And what do their stories tell us about the way God works?
The family way
Luke 2 tells us that Mary and Joseph went to Bethlehem because Caesar Augustus told them to. Caesar wanted to know how many taxpayers and potential soldiers he had at his command, and the best way to count them all was to herd them into their ancestral hometowns. It was easier than sending census-takers to every corner of the empire.
Even though Luke doesn't tell us if Mary rode a donkey, or if it was cold, or if the couple traveled alone, Luke's account says a lot about Mary and Joseph. They headed to Bethlehem because they belonged to the line of David—the royal line. All Israelites knew about David's great kingdom and God's promise to restore it one day. Oppressed by the Romans and gossiped about by their neighbors, Mary and Joseph still could hold their heads high. They carried the honor of their family.
Luke also tells us that the couple completed their trip. They obeyed an order, even though it came at a terrible time for them. They planned ahead and spent whatever it took to get the very pregnant Mary to Bethlehem safe and sound. Their parents must have trained them up to be godly and responsible.
My parents trained me up that way, too. I've never been to Bethlehem, but I know about Bethlehem and why it's so important because they told me. As a very young child, in 1979, I prayed to become a Christian. I was blessed to be part of a family of faith.
My story of coming to Christ doesn't take long to tell and doesn't have any exciting details. I appreciate the fact that Mary and Joseph's story of getting to Bethlehem, at least the way Luke tells it, doesn't have any exciting details, either. God doesn't shock everyone on the road like He did Saul. Some of His children get an early nudge in the right direction.
Open invitation
Shepherds were the next people to arrive at the stable in Bethlehem. They had been out in the field, minding their business, when creatures like none they'd seen before delivered a crazy message. The Lord wanted them—a bunch of no-name shepherds—to know that there was a baby in a manger somewhere who was going to save Israel? This they had to see.
We can assume that the shepherds were locals, steady enough to hold a job but of no particular property or status. We don't know how many there were or what happened to their sheep when they ran off in the night. But, again, Luke tells us more than immediately meets the eye.
First, these shepherds had open hearts and minds. Israel had been waiting for the Messiah for so long that some Israelites had given up hope. These people couldn't bring themselves to believe even after Jesus told them who He was and performed miracles before their eyes. The shepherds, by contrast, followed their optimistic curiosity to a barn and apparently accepted the unusual sight they found there. They lost no time in spreading the word to others.
Second, the shepherds had their priorities straight. They dropped everything to check out the angels' story. They could lose their livelihoods or, if they worked for an especially harsh master, their very lives for such an impulsive act, but as far as we know they didn't even hesitate. Finding out the truth about the Christ mattered more than anything.
An angel has never visited my mother, but she did hear about Jesus from friends. Her parents, both alcoholics, didn't go to church or offer any spiritual guidance. She might never have become a Christian if it weren't for the minister who led the youth group she stumbled into as a middle-schooler.
Curiosity and courage led my mother to a commitment that would, in some ways, permanently distance her from the rest of her family.
In Mom's case, God worked through intermediaries—the person who invited her to youth group, the students who helped her feel welcome, and the pastor who shared the gospel. God doesn't always send angels, but He always blesses the proclamation of His message.
Head trip
Magi were the last to arrive in Bethlehem. According to Matthew's account, they might have shown up as late as two years after Jesus' birth. And that's about all the information Matthew gives us.
Were the Magi kings or wise men? Did they travel as a trio? Where did they come from? Did they take the religion of Christ back with them? Nobody knows. Whoever they were, though, they possessed a few important character traits.
As "Wise Men Still Seek Him" bumper stickers remind us, the Magi were archetypal seekers. They used their intellects and the best information available to discover the truth about the universe. They dedicated their lives to the quest for knowledge.
The Magi didn't just conduct research in a laboratory, however. They displayed none of the academic detachment so highly prized today. When all the signs pointed toward something momentous in Bethlehem, they made the long trek to investigate. And when they got there, they didn't take notes, stroke their beards, and rush back to publish their findings. They worshiped. Their hearts followed their heads.
My father also found Jesus at the end of an intellectual journey. As a college student in the early 1970s, he was surrounded by competing life philosophies. But he wasn't the type to dabble or go with the flow. He decided to read up on various religions and evaluate their claims before choosing one to follow.
Eventually he came to a chasm his mind couldn't cross by itself. Christianity made a lot of sense, but no book could tell him if God really existed. So Dad asked. Alone in his room one night, he prayed, "God, if You're real, show me now." God came through, bright and clear as a star in the sky.
Echoes of grace
The figures in my nativity set were drawn to Bethlehem for different reasons, but God compelled them all. He guided David's family for hundreds of years, finally entrusting the promised king to the care of Mary and Joseph. He spoke to shepherds in the song of angels. He captured the imaginations of Magi with celestial pyrotechnics.
God guided my family, too. Our testimonies display different aspects of His work, but they echo each other. They also echo the story that started it all, the story of Christmas.
I ultimately decided to let the little girl in my nativity set stay. The sculptor who crafted her to match the other characters might have been trying to tell me something. How does a stranger get to Bethlehem? However God leads.
Elesha Coffman is a senior editor of Christian History & Biography and a doctoral student at Duke University
Saturday, December 18, 2004
A jerkass story...
When You Divorce Me, Carry Me Out in Your Arms
On my wedding day, I carried my wife in my arms. The bridal car stopped in front of our one-room flat. My buddies insisted that I carry her out of the car in my arms. So I carried her into our home. She was then plump and shy. I was a strong and happy bridegroom.
This was the scene of ten years ago.
The following days were as simple as a cup of pure water: we had a kid, I went into business and tried to make more money. When the assets were steadily increasing, the affections between us seemed to ebb. She was a civil servant. Every morning we left home together and got home almost at the same time. Our kid was studying in a boarding school.
Our marriage life seemed to be enviably happy. But the calm life was more likely to be affected by unpredictable changes.
Dew came into my life.
It was a sunny day. I stood on a spacious balcony. Dew hugged me from behind. My heart once again was immersed in her stream of love. This was the apartment I bought for her.
Dew said, "You are the kind of man who draws girls' attention." Her words suddenly reminded me of my wife. When we just married, my wife said, "Men like you, once successful, will be very attractive to girls." Thinking of this, I became somewhat hesitant. I knew I had betrayed my wife. But I couldn t help doing so.
I moved Dew's hands aside and said, "You go select some furniture, O.K.? I've got something to do in the company." Obviously she was unhappy, because I had promised her to go with her. At the moment, the idea of divorce became clearer in my mind although it used to be something impossible to me.
However, I found it rather difficult to tell my wife about it. No matter how mildly I mentioned it to her, she would be deeply hurt. Honestly, she was a good wife. Every evening she was busy preparing dinner. I was sitting in front of the TV. The dinner was ready soon. Then we watched TV together. Or, I was lounging before the computer, visualizing Dew's body. This was the means of my entertainment.
One day I said to her in a slight joking way, "Suppose we divorce, what will you do?" She stared at me for a few seconds without a word. Apparently she believed that divorce was something too far away from her. I couldn't imagine how she would react once she got to know I was serious.
When my wife went to my office, Dew had just stepped out. Almost all the staff looked at my wife with a sympathetic eye and tried to hide something while talking with her. She seemed to have got some hint. She gently smiled at my subordinates. But I read some hurt in her eyes.
Once again, Dew said to me, "Divorce her, O.K.? Then we live together." I nodded. I knew I could not hesitate any more.
When my wife served the last dish, I held her hand. "I've got something to tell you," I said.
She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes. Suddenly I didnt know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want to divorce. I raised the serious topic calmly.
She didn t seem to be much annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, "why?"
"I'm serious." I avoided her question. This so-called answer turned her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, "you are not a man!"
At that night, we didn't talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer, because my heart had gone to Dew.
With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company. She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. I felt a pain in my heart. The woman who had been living ten years with me would become a stranger one day. But I could not take back what I had said.
Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer.
A late night, I came back home after entertaining my clients. I saw her writing something at the table. I fell asleep fast. When I woke up, I found she was still there. I turned over and was asleep again.
She brought up her divorce conditions: she didn't want anything from me, but I was supposed to give her one month time before divorce, and in the month time we must live as normal life as possible. Her reason was simple: our son would finish his summer vacation a month later and she didn't want him to see our marriage was broken.
She passed me the agreement she drafted, and then asked me,"Do you still remember how I entered our bridal room on the wedding day?"
This question suddenly brought back all those wonderful memories to me. I nodded and said, "I remember." "You carried me in your arms" , she continued, "so, I have a requirement, that is, you carry me out in your arms on the day when we divorce. From now to the end of this month, you must carry me out from the bedroom to the door every morning."
I accepted with a smile. I knew she missed those sweet days and wished to end her marriage with a romantic form.
I told Dew about my wife s divorce conditions. She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she does, she has to face the result of divorce, she said scornfully. Her words more or less made me feel uncomfortable.
My wife and I hadn t had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. We even treated each other as a stranger. So when I carried her out for the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mummy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly, "Let us start from today, don't tell our son." I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for bus, I drove to office.
On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. We were so close that I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadnt looked at this intimate woman carefully for a long time. I found she was not young any more. There were some fine wrinkles on her face.
On the third day, she whispered to me, The outside garden is being demolished. Be careful when you pass there.
On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I seemed to feel that we were still an intimate couple and I was holding my sweetheart in my arms. The visualization of Dew became vaguer.
On the fifth and sixth day, she kept reminding me something, such as, where she put the ironed shirts, I should be careful while cooking, etc. I nodded. The sense of intimacy was even stronger.
I didn t tell Dew about this.
I felt it was easier to carry her. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger. I said to her, It seems not difficult to carry you now.
She was picking her dresses. I was waiting to carry her out. She tried quite a few but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, All my dresses have grown fatter." I smiled. But I suddenly realized that it was because she was thinner that I could carry her more easily, not because I was stronger. I knew she had buried all the bitterness in her heart. Again, I felt a sense of pain. Subconsciously I reached out a hand to touch her head.
Our son came in at the moment. "Dad, it s time to carry mum out." He said. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had been an essential part of his life. She gestured our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face because I was afraid I would change my mind at the last minute. I held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly, as if we came back to our wedding day. But her much lighter weight made me sad.
On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. She said, "Actually I hope you will hold me in your arms until we are old."
I held her tightly and said, "both you and I didn't notice that our life was lack of such intimacy."
I jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my decision. I walked upstairs. Dew opened the door. I said to her, "Sorry, Dew, I won't divorce. I'm serious.
She looked at me, astonished. The she touched my forehead. "You got no fever." She said. I moved her hand off my head. "Sorry, Dew," I said, "I can only say sorry to you, I won't divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn t value the details of life, not because we didn't love each other any more. Now I understand that since I carried her into the home, she gave birth to our child, I am supposed to hold her until I am old. So I have to say sorry to you."
Dew seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into cry. I walked downstairs and drove to the office.
When I passed the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet for my wife which was her favorite. The salesgirl asked me to write the greeting words on the card. I smiled and wrote, "I'll carry you out every morning until we are old."
You noe wat?...get rid of this guy....he onli wan the intimacy..honest.......
Another one of the borin quiz..
1. I can't live without______
* God...Air...And water...And food....nxt is my family and frens...nxt is pc...nxt is internet..nxt is aircon..
2. If only I could________
* Turn back time and do well for my As...and accept raymond..haha...then we'll be celebratin 3 yrs instead of 5 mths...
3. I don't want to be________
* a whore...a loser...an abuser...a stalker...a bitch...and a bimbo...
4. I want to see________
* my grandfathers...i miss them...i also want to see all As in my As...
5. I want to be____
* Smart...and less innocent...
6. I want to eat_____
* Everythin...haha...
7. I miss _________
* People. Many people. and those days when my brains are very good...Honest...my brains used to be very good....catch things v fast...understd v fast............think jc dull my senses....i take mths to understd a concept when others take days..
9. I want to get________
* married...hahaha....i wanna be hsewife~~~
10. I'm planning to have________
* a baby~!!...hahaha...no la...a wardrobe/hairdo change...but first muz have money....
11. I want to change my________
* gender~!!!..........hahahaha...ok ok...stop it...
12. I want to quit________
* bein a bimbo.....argh~.......a gal wif boobs and no brains.....
13. I love _________
* God/family/raymond/frens/me
14. I hate _________
* Me.
15. I'm proud to be________
* Singaporean???......haha...proud to be part of the Ohana....
16. I'm NOT regretting________
* goin to TPJC....
17. Tomorrow I'm going to_________
* sleep...haha..and play games......
18. I'm excited about ________
* gettin married...hahaha...and also celebratin Christmas....and gettin my uni results...
19. I'm happy because_________
* now? i'm not happy...i'm happy cuz i'm bloggin in peace....not realli in terms of volume..but more of no one buggin me for the pc...
20. I'm sad because________
* i cant realli shop today...and raymond and i not realli communicatin v well...
21. I'm into ______
* fantasy books and vampires........k........it's bad.........but ya.........i'm into music...i'm into a better life...i'm into a life in the countryside....
22. I'm thinking of _____
* sleepin............i'm like Liu Chuan Feng of Slamdunk...always slpin...
23. I'm going to ______
* sleep soon...
How you should treat your girlfriend...
Let's see if Raymond fulfil...hahahahahaha....EVIL~
Hey guys, this is how you shld treat your girlfriend..
Ladies, if your boyfriend doesn't treat you like this,
Then send it to them or print it out and show them. And if you're still looking for one, make sure he's one who will treat you like this.
This is really sweet! Aww! and GUYS remember to always be HONEST to ur GIRL and NEVER EVER, EVER... PLAY HER OKIES!?
1) Put your arms around her waist and whisper in her ears.. (Rayray got...)
2) Shower her with unconditional love and always be there for them.. (Eh...this is pretty general...)
3) Hold her close when she's cold and she can hold you too.. (Oh....he went even further..haha..he dun let me hold the ice cold cup....)
4) When you are alone hold her close and kiss her.. (Got......)
5) Accept her for who she is, and be frank with her.. (Eh.........guess so...except he gets a bit TOO frank sometime....ah well.........shrugs....doesnt bother..)
6) While in the movies, put your arm around her and then she will automatically put her head on your shoulder, then lean in and tilt her chin and kiss her lightly.. (Got.........*blush..*...i think a guy who gently tilt ur chin or touch ur face etc is VERY SWEET~~~*blush*)
7) When she complains that her neck/shoulders hurts massage it for her.. (haha...ok la..i dun realli complain my neck/shoulders hurt...i complain my hand hurt...and he will sayang for me....but more of try to prevent me from carryin heavy stuff...)
8) When people diss her, stand up for her.. (so far......No one DARE to diss me yet...hahaha...pluz..i not v easy to angry la....except wif raymond...but more of the pout pout jealous angry...not the WTH-u-doin angry....)
9) Look deep into her eyes and whisper into her ears, telling her you love her, make sure you really mean it.. (ok...i dun understd this...how to look deep and whisper at the same time............???? u noe...body restrictions??.....ok la....sometimes onli la...)
10) Lay down under the stars and out her head on your chest, so she can listen to the steady beat of your heart,Link your fingers together while you whisper to her as she rests her eyes and listens to you.. (hahaha...never got to try....but the lay down under stars and rest head on chest to hear heartbeat one got la.........but tt's dage....and tell u....dage's tummy v soft....but his elbow darn hard............cuz he elbowed my head when he was tryin to get up...forgettin i was there...)
11) Kiss her in the drizzle *just like in the movies*.. (eh....no...and i hope he wun...cuz...eh....let's get OUT of the rain will ya?)
12) Surprise her with her most favourite stuffs.. (haha....last time got la...nowadays dun have le........pout...last time he will buy dark choc suddenly...or buy the Fruit Basket vcd....Shocked sia....even wif the dark choc thingy..)
13) Always telling her how special she is to you cuz girls need reassurance once in a while.. (no he doesnt..................-_-"....unless i pout and get angry and paranoid and say tt he dun like me anymore..............guys.......so stingy wif their praises...at least lie to me la....)
14) Humming and singing her favourite song till she falls asleep in your arms,have some pillow talk.. (haha....nope....but i remember once he wanted to pat me to slp on the bus/taxi...haha...^_^.................ah well....usualli is I sing songs to him...pillow talk...got la...but i insisted one............pout.........)
15) Pamper her like she's your little princess and nvr hurt her.. (got....but sometimes he forget sia...........pout........i wan to be a little princess.......but all he says is...how old liao....still play like kids...and dun play wif ur food.........pout...talk bout romantic guys...)
Quiz again..
1. My desktop shows:
- Blackness...cuz me and my bro used to argue betw puttin Brad Pitt and tt Aerosmith daughter.......sorry..forgot her name......
2. Book I'm reading:
- Michael A. Stackpole..The Grand Crusade...very disappointed wif the endin.....darn it......they have to make my fav char die....
3. On my mouse pad:
- MRC...some dismantled car wheel..with the words "The World's leader in aeroengine bearings.." Wateva tt is....
4. Favorite board game:
- CLUEDO~~~!!!
5. Favorite magazine:
- the Channel U....but cuz of the tv serial summaries behind...Reader Digest...
6. Favorite smell:
- Famous Amos!!~~! Though i dun realli like eatin them...too sweet....i also like the smell of new plastic bags.....and shoppin centre's aircon.....hahahaha....
7. Least favorite smell:
- Bloody fish....as in...fish and their blood....
8. Worst feeling in the world:
- To betray someone....as in betray their trust in u.......hate it when i break promise.....another horrible feelin is when everyone who are my loved ones but aint Christians....
9. Favorite sound:
- the bubble poppin sound tt we all like to make.....esp durin KKK's math tutorial...
10. First thing I think of when I wake up in the
morning:
- Mornin?? i dun wake up in the mornin......i stay in bed as long as possible...until it's too hot to stay in bed...or when i'm too hungry...which in both cases.....is usualli near noon...
11. Rings before I answer the phone:
- twice.....haha...or rather after i check the caller id...
12.Favorite color:
- Blue...black...haha....the rest changes accordingly...currently it's green...
13. Do I like my name?:
- Okay lah..dun like the Yun..cuz i cant realli write the capital letter "Y" properly....always write it the mirror image way...
14. I was named after:
- a cow...haha...or rather the famous hardworkin virtue of the cow....(note....it's the "Yun"...i'm not named after the cloud....)
15. Favorite food:
- French Fries....fried rice...and bee hoon...and hor fun~!!! (ask all in NUS....i used to eat horfun everyday...).....
16. Do I drive fast?:
- No license...but i guess i'll drive fairly slow....i a bit scare-dy cat....so i'm not goin to drive....save me the heart problems...
17. Chocolate or vanilla?:
- Chocolate!!!...haha...but vanilla is nice too....too much choc v sickenin.....
18. Worst disaster I fear:
- War......and the end of world........cuz ppl i noe are not entirely Christians....i scared for them........as much as i scare for myself....
19. Storms, cool or scary?:
- Cool...........and scary...........cool in the day.........scary at nite............
20. My first car:
- silverish blue~...muz be as cool as sports car..and as comfortable as any family cars......ah well...most prob is my hubby's preference la.....i'm not drivin......
21. Dead or alive, I would like to meet:
- My loved ones.....
22. Zodiac sign:
- Scorpio.
23. Favorite drink:
- Ice lemon tea.......and kopi~....ie...hot coffee wif milk and sugar.....hey...those who drink coffee..let's go Ah Kun....the kopi not bad wor~....one of the highclass kopitiam at bugis also v good....thick enuf...
24. Favorite vegetable:
- CABBAGE~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ and potato...if the latter is veggie...
25. If I could have any job, it would be:
- Wild biologist..it's my dream since sec skool........but ah well........this is juz a questionaire....in reality....forget it man.........let's juz stick to Discovery Channel....
26. Hair, long or short:
- Long....
27. Times I've been in love:
- 2...3? Sorry...a bit confused there....
28. Glass, half-empty or half-full:
- Half full
29. Do I type with my fingers over the right
keys?:
- ??? there is a left key?
30. Favorite movie:
- LOTR~
31. What's under my bed?:
- HAHAHAHAHA.................my junks...........collection from kiddy times...and i cant bear to throw...for eg my collection of erasers...
32. Lucky number:
- 38...haha...ok.....no choice...but everytime i have exams...either results will have this number...(PSLE:238)...or my register number lor~....
33. Favorite sport to watch:
- Gymnastics.....spin spin spin........very nice...
34. PC or Mac:
- PC...haha...
35. On my nightstand:
- Hahahaha....junks...my phone...my watch...my specs...my accessories...and any junks tt i happen to throw there and forget about it.......to those who went to dage's hse...and saw his table top...ya....mine is like tt....excludin the dust...i cannot std dust..they make me itchy...
36. Pillows on my bed:
- 1...used to have two......one for me.....one for my bolster......
37. In case of fire, I'll take:
- Everything i can grab...money...id...certs...photos...
38. I admire:
- no one in particular...
39. Best thing ever invented:
- Light!..though they destroyed night sky....hmm...COMPUTER GAMES~!!!
40. Most influential person:
- Eh?? as in? in my life?....Dajie and dage....their words always get stuck in my head...hahaha...dunno why....
41. Favorite place(s):
- Whereva my frens are...haha...but i love the beach...and the bed....
42. Do I say my prayers?:
- yup....anytime possible....esp before lucky dips...(That's why u get ur wireles keyboard Raymond....)
43. Minutes I spend in the shower:
- Eh...rangin from half and hr to one hr....cuz i like the bring a book in......
44. Most prized possession:
- Many....phone...specs...books...wallet...money..my OLD result books...not the recent ones...burn them for all i care...
45. My best asset:
- Hahaha....my eyes?...except tt they are spoilt...cant see wifout glasses...
46. Jewelry I wear:
- ring.....one big AP ring...
47. Coke or Pepsi:
- Coke...
48. What I had for breakfast:
- Bread and plain water...
49. Favorite time of the year:
- HOLIDAY~~~
50. If I were a cartoon character, I would be..
- DUMBO~~~ I LOVE DUMBO~
Went out today..
Went out wif raymond today...went to ps to sign up for his starhub cable...yup...then we went for the lucky dip...and he got a Logitech wireless keyboard and mouse!!!!! Damn lucky..
Hai~...then we went to EBase and i bought a top...my mum find the gapin hole behind rather apalling and she initally insisted that i bought too big a size...then i have to assure her tt it's like tt.........i shall show u guys nxt time..it's GREEN~ i finally bought somethin tt is green...so happy...haha....
Anywae..then we went to eat Yoshinoya...cuz raymond throat not gd...better dun eat oily fried stuff....then we went to Bugis Sim Lim to buy his broadband router.......it was rainin.........and in the end we have a lot of stuff to carry~!~!
Not tt it's me who carry la....Raymond happen to have very strong arms u noe...ya...i responsible for carryin umbrella...haha...
then later we took bus home....then i alight at bedok interchange then he continue his way home...
then i went to walk ard interchange..nothin to buy...so went to the cafe at bedok lib...grab a Woman's Weekly and ordered a Cocoa-Mocha Ice Blend and a plate of onion rings...sit there and eat and read til they make an announcement tt the library closin in 15 mins...so i packed up and left for home....
Then go home...bathe...slept a lil...as in drift in and out...then eat dinner...and here i am...bloggin..while my aunt and my sis and my mum chit chattin in the same room...hai~.....
Listenin to "Hey Sexy Lady" by shaggy...whoeva wan come ask me....
Friday, December 17, 2004
Me and my writing career.
Juz suddenly remembered that i love to write.....When have i abandoned writing and when hav i abandoned good el?
Haha........dunno la..........suddenly fell in love wif writin again after reading Meg Cabot's "Boy Meets Girl"........i like the way she write.........it's so like the way i write.....haha...then reading the writers of the HOOKED mag.....suddenly wanna write an article or two as well...but ah well...
Then again......nah........lazy...........big fat lazy bumbum here aint no gonna spend her time tryin to fight thru writer's blocks which she often have except when comes to bloggin......
Haha........one day la.......if i eva write and publish anythin............guess it will be those reali small articles or those GAME REVIEWS~
Dammit.........it's too good to be true...........to earn a living by playing games and writin reviews..........
My bio teacher says she used to noe a fren who graduated a major in Biology....and is doin a job like this.....a gal.......spendin her time playin games and writin reviews............
Hahaha........sounds cool........tt's my ambition.......beside bein a good wife and a good hsewife......
I'm tryin to learn to overcome the fear of oil.......................eeeeeeeeew............and bloody fish......
As in literally bloody......
And also......if i wanna write......i gotta learn proper el and grammer and go build those vocab pool sia.......
K..........pool of vocabs......
Pool of vocabs words....
Pool of words which are vocabulary?
Hahaha......wat eva......
Thursday, December 16, 2004
From my school's Hooked magazine
Oh i love this mag sia......anywae...got a couple of snippets to share...they are v funny....
Top 10 Reasons Why Watching a Horror Movie is BETTER Than Sex
10. It’s easier to catch a horror movie.
9. You can pay for a movie without feeling bad about it.
8. You can give it a bad review without hurting the other party. (haha...)
7. You don’t have to do much work in a horror movie.
6. The fear only lasts in 2 hours and not 9 months on.
5. You can do it with ALL your friends. (haha..)
4. You can even do it ALONE. (HAHA......haha...)
3. You’ll always get a sequel no matter how bad it was.
2. There’s no mess once the movie is over.
1. A movie will never end prematurely.
An article about the Uni students who dun wear properly:
"Read the Sunday Times on 29th August 2004, page 41, and you might just find some pictures of yourself. The reporter took pictures of 9 students, pixelated their faces and ‘commented’ on their attire.
Now I wonder, what does this reporter wear for work? What is her dress code? Then I realized: they get paid to work; they get paid to dress presentably; and they get paid to criticize. *ah-hah!*
NTU actually has a dress code in place. Whether it’s in their constitution or pseudo-subsidiary legislation, we have no idea. It seems NTU students don’t have any idea either. Applause for the non-conformists though!
Possible reasons as to why do university students need a dress code?
2 of the 9 comments Ms. Reporter made:
Comment #1
Reporter: no difference between campus clothes and hawker stall.
Journalist: What are campus clothes? Do people actually have a dress code for hawker clothes? Are you discriminatory of people who cannot afford campus clothes (if there were any in the first place)?
Comment #2
Reporter: Is it right for school to wear midriff baring top, mini-skirt, and heels?
Journalist: What is right? How would you describe the exact problem with the top? Too short or too tight? So should the dress code now be, width should be 3” more than your body width, length should be 3” below belly-button? No skirts allowed? Or skirts cannot be more than 1” above the knee? Heels are disallowed so that there would be less casualties at UHWC when ladies in heels trip and roll down the 3 million flights of steps in school."
Honestly..i agree...come on la....these reporters have nothin better to do...or maybe..they are juz tryin to find somethin to report...i mean..come on lor..u wear skool uni for the past 12 yrs of ur lives...provided u're from jc la...then if u are goin to work for the rest of ur life...there is a certain dress-code u have to obey for the rest of ur lives.........AND they have to restrict us durin uni...i mean............ok.........some pple wear slippers to skool....i alternate bet normal jeans to anyhow-berms to sometimes too-short skirts...dajie alternate bet dressin very nicely and very anyhow-ly......justina goes to skool in standard tshirts and berms and slippers for the whole sem........the onli time i see her in jeans is durin exams period........becuz of the aircon.......
So wat?...wat's the prob? no prob wat...even tho i do feel amazed at how some gurls can tahan the cold in tube tops and mini skirts and such high heels!~!! Gosh...how do they survive walkin ard the skool and up and down the stairs???
Ok...there is always the internal shuttle buses and newly installed lifts (actualli meant for the disabled...hmm..see any links there?).......
And of cuz...all the walkin ard shoppin for new heels....in heels....help train those ankles and leg muscles....
Haha...do i sound like i'm discriminatin those who wear heels? I'm not la....i'm juz amazed...and point to note..i cant walk in heels...tt explains the amazement..no offense..realli...
BTW...some pple live in hostels....u wan them to dress nicely in jeans everyday??? hey....they wash their own clothes wor.....and jeans is definitely not easy to wash....i've got exp......ok fine..there's always the washin machine..and fine..i washed wif my bare hands~!!
Ah well....hail to all reporters........u guys got nothin much to do..........ps.........the skools and students doesnt seems to care sia.....it's my aunts and parents who bombard me wif qns like " u all uni wear until like tt one ar.....skool like not skool like tt...."
Hey ello.....at least we dun make out in public or somethin la.......we are decent pple.....
Tuesday, December 14, 2004
Me and my nerve
Shall tok bout my Ulnar nerve next time....still pain~
Yeah...different form of pain.........
Haha.....i miss raymond.....................he say i'm gettin paranoid and be careful dun be too obsessive and clingy....
Pout~
Like this song....called "Rise and Fall"..by Craig David and Sting...
I need a life pple~
I need a book and a good game and a good day out shoppin.............
Went to eat Thai Express
Yesterday went to meet raymond in the afternn...cuz he havin checkup at NUH...so i took the train to buona vista....
And i dun hav a book...and my mp3 player is now sort of my sis's......so i ACTUALLY day-dreamed my way there....
So cool sia..then when we met....we realised tt...we were both wearin light blue polo tshirt....so paiseh...haha.....cuz later we goin city hall ma...so quite weird to wear couple colour...
Anywae...we went to walk ard...from marina sq to esplanade then back to raffles city to find dajie at starbucks....
Then when we saw tt she's wif her sis and uncle...we thot it aint nice to hang ard..haha...so we went inside to get a seat....and raymond hav to pick a seat by the window...so tt he can "spy" on dajie they all...hopin tt one of them can see us............hahahaha....i say tt's VERY stalkish of him...
Then i went to buy a VERY EXPENSIVE slice of WARM CHOC CAKE....it's nice la....but u need bout 4 pple to eat...cuz it's TOO choc...i've nv been so sick of choc.....but it's nice...it;s $5.50 lor!!!
Anywae...then dajie they all takin photos and raymond was like tryin to be xtra in the bg...haha..from our seats la...haha...he was doin the "twist" thingy...and dajie's sis saw tt gesture...haha...and ya.... everybody saw everybody..
Then later raymond gotta buy a table fan for his chief clerk...so we cheong to suntec and back to raffles city....i've nv been so dizzy and tired....................ARGH~~~~~~~
then later raymond go back camp..then dajie and i went to meet XinMei....some senior we got to noe at our aerobics class....she's goin hawaii for her exchange program...so cool rite?...ya....so we went to eat at Thai Express at Esplanade...
I ate curried soft-shell crabs wif eggs and onions and steamed rice~............it's nice...haha...not bad la....costs $8.90...then dajie ate beef noodles...xinmei ate tom yam soup wif fish..
Then later we went to sit beside the river...infront of esplanade...and chitchat for a v long time...had a great time..haha....i was sittin very comfortably crosslegged wifout shoes on the platform..haha....while bein tranced by the rhythmic movement of the waves and their sounds.....hahaha....
Then later we went toilet and i nearly entered the guys toilet...not my fault...there's a gals toilet sign nearby...haha....anywae...thank goodness dajie stopped me...
If not there will be some high-pitched squeal comin from the toilet sia....
And definitely not from me...haha...
Then later we meet up wif dajie's sis and her bf and head home lor~...
Then reached home and joined my sis, bro and dad wif a v mind-engagin viewin of "The Dreamcatcher"...haha...nice show...
Ah well....juz now played Cronous.....then tryin to train level to play wif dage la...then there's this guy called "RAYMONDHO"...dun mind the caps..tt's exactly his nick...then he was the same cahr as me ma....so he was like...hi....wat's ur lvl?...then i was like...25?....then he suddenly wanted to trade and gave me these three somewhat rare items....then i was v shocked and said tt i dun hav anythin in return la..........then he was like...."give u la".......then i accepted and was like "realli? ok....thx"....then he juz say "bye" and left the game....
Then my sis was like....aiyah...,maybe his inventory too fulll then too rich then juz give me lor~....
Ah well....haha....stress....the other time this guy wanted to buy some very good weapon from me...i was so stressed i mass msged dage.....i finally sold it at a rather cheap price...haha....then dage msged "I seriously dun understd wat's so stress bout...but never mind.."...ah well...
Then he say he leavin for camp le..then i was like...have u eaten dinner?....then he was like..."Dinner? Haha....bye.."
Ok.........i guess u guys all noe wat he mean.........
-_-"
Thursday, December 09, 2004
Tuesday, December 07, 2004
Party at TokTok's hse...
Kk...in the afternn....me and raymond went to watch "Alexander"...it was quite nice at first...then it got a bit confusin and draggy at the end.....haha....a bit too chim...
I ate two cheesy hotdogs (as usual..)...and raymond ate one jumbo hotdog set....i think....(as usual wif chilli and custard and extra cheese...yum...i prefer wif ketchup instd of chilli though...cuz custard is hot itself..)...and a large cup of coke which he forgot to change to ice lemon tea.........
And~....he v sweet...he noe my hands v cold le then he helped me hold the cup....and tilted the cup and pressed the straw so tt it is delivered into my mouth....
All with one hand wor~
I mean it may sounds very 'duh' when i re-account.....but then hor~ at tt time he is realli v seriously sayin..."dun touch the cup"
Then later we went to buy drinks.........or rather..........a big bottle of Heaven and Earth's Honey Greentea....cuz wendy wanna drink......come to think bout it....got one flavour is raymond wan one...then i didnt let him buy cuz i say it's such a big bottle and maybe onli he himself wan to drink~!
Oh.
Hahaha....sorry.....
Anywae, i'm gettin sick of re-tellin...........so summarised:
Went there....onli me and raymond and wendy and justina.....so we sat ard a laptop....while justina and wendy watchin some flash love story series online....raymond and i gettin conversational about cupcakes and broadband router~ (oh my goodness...am i still a gurl?)
then toktok appeared wif his cheesecake! he juz baked it himself.....then we were all commentin about it etc....its v nice wor~...the crust v nice...cuz he added icing sugar....but the cake itself...a bit too loose...it disintegrate easy...and rather sour...haha...not enuf sugar perhaps?
then we helped his sis decided which earrings go wif her dress....then we watched how his bro played Sol _______ ...........hahaha....
Then later we ate alotof stuff...and guo tiao...and etc...then pinky and collin came...and we watched the video tt toktok recorded....also got the last day of our school and also the prom....and saw a lot of DAGE~~~!!!!!!!!
He's so shuai last time...before he cut and dyed his hair remember?....ya.............then got my bdae cake............then got the prezzie tt dage gave us.....remember those big paper bags of stuff?.....ya~...and dajie's sea-shells curtain?
Ya...then got prom also.....haha....
Ah well....then later dajie came...then we watched New Police Story 2 (the jackie chan one)....but before tt me, raymond and dajie was playin wif the swing outside toktok hse...........haha....so fun....then later we go in...then toktok took out two mattress and put in fron of tv wif pillows and bolsters and cuishions...............so we were like lyin on the mattress watchin movie wif the aircon on and orange lights........it's like slumber party!!~
And then at nite v late le...so we all went home le lor......yup............
Monday, November 29, 2004
BBQ at Costa Sands
Ok...meet raymond in the morn to go see the it fair at expo...it's called SiteX...my sister workin there...so we went to find her as well....then he is so sweet...he was like...if got crowds....he'll go first...then pull me along behind me....
^_^....cuz he scared i got taken advantage of....pluz scared i lousy dunno how to move the crowd....then scared i got swept away by the crowd...haha...
Then the IT part of cuz interest me onli to a certain extent...he also la...he come to buy the stuff he need onli....then there is also a game and anime fair included too....so we went to see la..after all....we are both gamers as well as anime-ers....haha...i mean...he not realli la...he more for books....he buy books as crazily as i buy comics....
Then got games wor~...This Caucasian gal...she is so pro....one of the best female gamer in the world i think.....the way she play Quake 3 (i think tt's the game) is so pro......raymond says she super accurate..haha...i was tryin to get him to go up..haha...then got gunbound and cronous as well.....also got a lot of other games like Siah or somethin la....Korean games is rather popular sia....
Then the whole place machiam like arcade..haha...i was like tellin raymond we shld plop down and game the whole day....
Anywae...then got Cosplay~!....but my sis says it is a bit gross cuz got this real plump gal actin as Yuna....i think dage will faint sia....then we saw someone dressed up as Gundam wor~......haha....
Then raymond spent $68 buyin a 3rd party FM transmittor or somethin.....nope...not FM receiver.....Transmitter....
Then later we went to tampines to eat beef noodles (correction....he ate beef set meal wif rice..)...then we were stuck in the Sans bookshop...cuz the books we want will come probably one yr later............sobsob............*wail~* Anywae...he bought a set of books for bout $60+? cant remember.....v ex la....hardcover ma.......
Then later we took 31 back to bedok...where he left for home...and i meet up wif mao mao, justina, siling, maureen, toktok, huangwei, wendy and pinky...and we took a shuttle bus there....
Upon arrivin...a bit paiseh...cuz it turns out tt juana and her bf AND her bf's frens are there....then cuz the bf's frens all in the room...so we all crowded OUTSIDE the room....it was VERY awkward.....poor juana....everybody juz stood at loss...while juana keep callin us to go in...............
Honestly...the room is damn small lor..u wan 9 of us to squeeze in a tiny room where the entire bed took up the whole space wif the bf's frens?? Who i muz add are lookin v dao and v sian and are so much older than all of us...ie....are we to squeeze together on the same bed ma?
Then so we decided to hang ard outside.....however becuz it was rainin beforehand...the flr and all the sit-able area are wet la....then it's still drizzling a lil...but we all stood outdoor lor...then siling and wendy got a lil bit too.....well....enthu in their discussion bout how to get the pple inside out....i mean....a bit too loud and obvious la....i mean...if they are ppl we dunno can la....but the bf is outside wif us too lor..........how embarrassin rite?...
But no...they go on tokin bout how we go in and kick them out etc...or if we come in the morn then they will be the one outside etc.....
Then i was quietly commentin wif huangwei and maomao at the corner and they agreed that perhaps we shld hav kept those comments to ourselves.....
Anywae....end up we are sittin on newspapers outside la....then the worse thing happen......
U see....bbq hav fires....fires have smoke............
So u can imagine we are a grp of smoked pple outdoors where everybody's eyes are stung wif smoke........................argh..................i was like squintin whereva i walk....while siling and maureen disappeared....
But ya....we were taking turns to fan the charcoal etc....distributin beehoon brought by toktok....try-and-taste the orange syrup + water mixture....haha.......
While the grp of pple sit inside and drink tiger beer and sit in the aircon on the bed watchin tv...........
Sorry...dun realli like them...
Then later we start to bbq food...while mass takin weird photos....while mass chitchattin about everythin under the sun....
Haha...the best thing is when u hav toktok and pinky and wendy.......u'll nv hav a silent party....
Haiyoh...we were discussin bout scandalous things...haha....and everythin la....
Then later the grp within came out to bbq...while we moved in to watch tv....channel 8...i think it's cool watchin tv as a grp....esp love movies.....cuz there are heated discussions bout how gross tt guy is to the gal etc....how sweet is his actions etc.........WHILE playin majong on the bed....come on la....u got justina, toktok, juana and me.........u'll always have majong...
I muz say tt out of 4 rounds....i won 2 (nearly 3) while juana won 1.....as for the last one...it goes like this...i shld hav won......but cuz toktok very luckily got 8 out of the 13 tiles of a (shi san yao~....) at the beginnin of the game.....then he v swiftly gotten 11 out of 13 wor....then we decided not to win the game so as to let him make his shi san yao...haha....
Anywae....later toktok, wendy and i took a scandalous photo...an attempt to make it look like a three-some....WAHAHAHA........the three of us on the bed...huggin a white pillow to our chest...haha...
Anywae...later at bout 10.30pm...we left (toktok,siling and maureen left first)....then huangwei and maomao v nice....it is v v v v dark and ulu to go home............but they make it a pt to look out for us....esp maomao....he took the initiative to take the front while huangwei take the back...................cuz me pinky wendy a bit high at nite....or maybe cuz we scared of the dark la...we chat and chat and crap and crap NON-STOP for the next half an hr.....and we v excitedly wanderin at the front.....(note....we dunno the way....) .......so we hav huangwei at the back...researchin in the bus guide....for the last bus timings...he even asked justina for a map of this area (cuz she brought)......wah.......Commando trainin sia.....haha....
Then maomao is tailin behind the three of us...in fear tt we meet anyone insane or get lost of somethin....he's v nice wor...he didnt complain cuz honestly...............the 3 of us not in the right mind...wif wendy screamin at all the snails tt pinky point out to her.....and i screamin everytime she scream.........and there was this suspected-drunk lorry driver who suddenly swerved infront of us at a carpark...........and i let out a REALLI high pitched scream at the lorry while leapin to the side...haha......
Then we were walkin along this realli dark long long long path beside a v big drain filled wif water(the most snails and white mushrooms...)
....before tt was a v v v dark and long overhead bridge (where we scared of ghosts.......this is where we cling to maomao the most....).
.........and before tt was a v v v big detour ard the grass patch to the stairs of the overhead bridge (cuz wendy afraid of snakes...and i'm afraid of mud....hmmmm...?...)
and before tt was a rekee (dunno how to spelll....but it meant scoutin)...Done by ME~......yesh...i volunteered to go before them to look for any openin in the metal fence.....\/ ^_^.........then i found wor...still got stairs somemore.....then the first step was too low...so i stepped....Screamed....stumbled.....followed by pinky and wendy who did the same thing.....and followed by a very amused maomao....and justina and huangwei...
And no.....the 3 of them didnt scream....
Then later huangwei took the bus and left...while we went to a diff busstop and witnessed the two buses that we can take leave us as we walked to the busstop.........then we sat at the busstop and have fun swingin our legs while askin maomao bout everythin in army.....
Then later we took the bus 31 to bedok interchange.......supposedly is justina and wendy take to tampines interchange.....but then i think justina reluctant......then when it's at bedok there...wendy suddenly went ok bye bye guys.........i can take the bus myself......and etc....
Then we were like half dragged her....then for me rite...i went to the door...so as to make it as if i wanna alight........so tt the bus driver wun close the door too soon ma....then maomao was like..."Mother...pls...get off..." While justina and pinky makin a v big racket.....hahaha...........end up........we pulled her off...............
Come to think of it.........why do we do tt leh? It's becuz maomao want to send ALL of us home....so he suggested (actualli he suggested long time ago.............but to justina la..........so the rest of us didnt noe....) tt all 5 of us squeezed taxi............which we did...........and so i alighted first and etc lor.........
Then when i reached home....Huangwei msged if i've reached home le.....yup...
These are v nice guys tt we have.......
Oh oh oh.........and i muz say...........i half hugged toktok~!!! Haha.....^_^....so happy...cuz i was restin my arm on his shouldars........then i couldnt resist it.........so i hugged him from his left side...........hahaha...he juz gave a v nice laugh....think he's amused pluz paiseh la.....Anywae....at the resort.....he wanted to lie down and watch tv at the same time.............he sa jiao la...haha
So cute....then so i suggested tt he put a white fluffy pillow on wendy's legs....since she's sittin crosslegged in the middle of the bed...and then he lie down lor....so end up toktok lie on her legs thru the pillow...while his legs are crossed at the same time to avoid kickin maureen and siling...
Hahaha....scandalous sia...haha.
Who's perfect for u?
A sweet guy..who will take you everywhere...(ok...i edited...cuz the owner of the quiz gave a bit "Duh" comments..)
Who's Perfect For You??? (Cute Anime Pics)
brought to you by Quizilla
Where Does Your Beauty Lies?
Your Beauty lies
in Plain Sight.
Plain, simple and the girl next
door.
People tend overlook you as you are the
"normal girl", but you're actually
very beautiful.
And you have plenty about you to
set you apart, but more that
lets you blend.
People love the stability you have
because as others may come
and go, you will always be there and you may always
be the same.
You like simple
things and that's what people like about you.
You
most likely enjoy things most
consider normal, like movies, shopping, that sort
of thing and are very friendly
and probably have many friends.
You are sweet and
kind and that shows on you,
but you're also strong and not very naive.
You're a
rather well-rounded
individual.
Even though some people pass you off as
just another girl, shrug it
off because they don't know what they're
missing.
Some Things
That Represent You:
Element:
Earth, Light
Animal: Cat
Color:
Pinks, Blues, Browns
Song:
Girl Next Door by Pilot
Expression: Simple
Smile
Gemstone:
Alexandrite
Mythological Creature: Fox
Demon, Hobbit
Planet: Jupiter
Hair
Color: Light Brown
Eye Color:
Brown
Quote:
"To the world you may be one person, but to
one person you may be the world."
Where Does Your Beauty Lie?
brought to you by Quizilla
How Romantic are You?
A strong breeze could blow a fluffy girl like you
right over, emotionally speaking. While its
cool to be in tune with ur feelings, you tend to
get carried away before you think things thru.
This leads to muddled priorities----like the time
you sobbed so hard wathing A WALK TO REMEMBER
on HBO that you completely forgot you had to do
your homework. Remember, sappy movies are an
escape from real life, not models for one.
how romantic are you?
brought to you by Quizilla
Wednesday, November 24, 2004
UJOURNAL
Ok........ujournal is up........yup...........and to prevent others from readin the bloggies tt i put "For Frens onli".....i decided to keep it tt way...and cuz i wanna let rayray read..............................i decided to cut and paste~!!~!~!~!
Haha...no la....not all.......onli specific selected ones......haha.......
This is machiam like best collections sia....
okok....^_^
Haha..i'm not done wif it yet la..........gotta study.......boy i'm in my hol mood liao........
My Murder
2004-03-06 11:22:00
I had a dream this morn
i was murdered
it's scary
it was slow
no blood seen
stab stomach
i bled to death
painful
i felt everythin
by someone i dunno in reality
then i suddenly can std up n walk ard.....
then realised nobody can see me..
i was dead..
but tt ws at the end of the dream
it's so vivid........i felt the knife
the funny thing is
the whole long dream is very very very real n izarre....but apparently...i'm tryin to stab this guy ....middle-aged guy....while he tries to stab me.......thruout the whole dream..
we were enemies
but we never dare
until suddenly we both agreed wor.....
it's not a funny dream leh
we stabbed each other...
suddenly
very fast
stomach
then dunno why.........we hav this small machine attached to us
no....not violent...it's like...cold-blooded...like get very close...then suddenly stabb
haha...it's to count heart rate one
very small...like my wallet size
then he died first
then i realised mine is droppin.......then stomach wet wet,,,..then i keep holdin to my back n front.....then very painful...then i died.....
then i remember i keep askin a guy i'm very close to...why u never come n help me? if help comes fast enuf...i would hav live....
It's a a totally feelin bein a ghost....
thurout the dream...i'm rather no emotions one...no fear...no panic...juz slowly slowly...it's a very emotionless dream...the beginnin part also got a lot of excitin parts..but i cannot remember...the murder is too vivid...i still remember how the knife felt...
A level results
Ok...yesterday too chaotic le...
My results are
GP A2
Math B
Bio C
Chem D
Which is like...ABCD...wat the.........ah well...i had a hard time explainin tt "D" is NOT a fail....haha...
Honestly..dage juz poke me yesterday...as in...mentally poke...cuz i was sayin i also dunno why i reacted like this...i took my results...hugged the whole chunks of books to my chest...then struggled thru the crowd to dage who is lookin at me...tryin to catch any signs of....well...would-be-break-down..
Then i dun wanna look at him...cuz i haven register the results yet...so i stagger stagger...then reached dage then say..."Eh...where's the rest?".....Then he say "How issit?" Then i show him....then i cry.....
Oh my goodness...then the followin events becum simply chaotic....n simply too fast....too many pple...i noe pinky n dajie keep goin on bout their "ABC" like Saimese twins....so cute...
Then toktok look very disappointed...his subjects all straight "c"s........but his GP got C5...which is simply impossible cuz toktok's GP is always very good....aiyoh...so poor thing...
Then dage look non-chalent...got CDD i tink...issit?..cant remember....but i noe he passed his bio...which he is so happy...haha....he cheong bio ar.....
Then xm look red...(pardon me.. ^_^)..as in..the emotions ragin within...n ready to burst...like she gek gek...then gek til the poor face becum totally red....It's ok dear....dun get too upset....*hugs*
ok..fine...i sux at consolin pple....but i dunno la...i had made the worst preparations....i went thru all the poly courses....even chose one tt i wan.....my expected grade was:
GP C5
Math E
Bio D
Chem O/F
And if u realli keep track to all my results rite....i'm not exaggeratin...i hav the Capability to get this grade....so i was totally xtreme not worried at all...wasnt even thinkin bout A level AT ALL....
UNTIL tt stupid principal announced the 3 As students..Wendy ar....Raymond ar.....ok...i'm not sayin i'm jealous...i juz felt a bit sad tt my name will never be called...But not tt bad wor...
THEN the 4 As students......which is gyan n lijuan....n i felt so............so.....bleah.......cuz we all same class in sec skool...of cuz dajie said tt different study environment different.....but.......i cant help feelin so upset cuz......it's the "why issit they can do tt....but i cant?? It's not tt im stupid...."
I'm not jealous of their grades u noe...i'm juz disappointed wif myself once again.....it's those....u-can-do-it-and-u-dun-go-n-do....
Tt's why i cry...a mixture of both happy n upset.....i dunno...i keep cryin as i tok....my voice went horribly distorted,..n i think i muz hav look hideous....haha...
Aniwae...the mental poke thing...ya....dage juz say tt i cry cuz i expected bad....n i got better than expected...i'm happy....then i get upset cuz it's not good enuf....
Hai......i used to be very competitive last time la....compare ranks n grades for almost every subjects with the whole class....aiyoh.....
But when dage said tt rite...though he said it in a matter of fact way...but i sort of feel so embarrased of myself...i mean....how greedy can u get?......hai~....
I learnt my lesson...haha...
But i'm glad...n i thank God last nite...in my bathroom....i knelt down n wept into my hands....i dunno why...suddenly i juz felt so upset...cuz the mental psycho-in myself tt i will not be able to go U.......n actualli succeeded in psycho-in myself...n tt i didnt realli go n kill myself or cry everynite....
i mean...wifout God....wifout u guys....i dunno how...dunno how i went thru those times....Thank u...
Pluz...note...the 4 of us went out to play...haha..sounds like 3 lil piggies went out to play.....ok aniwae..note tt we didnt realli tok bout results n future n etc.....
We had a mutual agreement to put everythin aside...n hav fun...like lil children...at the playground...i told dage how nice will it be if lives is like a playgrd...stressfree..n heck wateva everybody says...
Dage smiled....haha....so sweet....hugs.
Boycott Parkway Poh Heng!!!
2004-03-01 18:56:00
Some freaky idiotic B***H called Annie n a whole bunch of staff pple FORCED my sister to give a treat at KTV juz becuz she gotten her pay....think pay rise or somethin......
Note the bloody word wif a capital F!!!.............
(tt's Force....not F**K...mind u.....iim a civilised old hag...)
I mean...my sister is sick lor........sick pple cannot drink champange or wat...alcohol....
I woke up at 1.30++ AM today..........WHY??........cuz i heard my sister's desperate pukin into the toilet bowl.......she's not drunk..........
It's juz tt when u are sick....ur stomach aint good..........not even good enuf to stomach alcohol lor.....
My mum is furious...n of cuz say my sis is an idiot who dunno how to fight back.....n my bro is pissed cuz he felt he shld had gone rite up n punch those idiots......(cuz my bro n sis both work at parkway...) N my sis's bf....who is workin at another branch of Poh Heng was boilin away liao.......
And as for me.........MAKE DARN SURE THEY DUN APPEAR INFRONT OF ME!!...
Freakin pple............USE UR ALL BLOODY MONEY N PAY FOR UR OWN BLOODY MEALS!!.....DUN BE SUCH A PAIN IN UR BLOODY ASSES N JOLLY WELL GO KISS UR OWN DANGLIN FLESH FULL OF CONCENTRATED FAT DROOPIN BEHIND UR HIPS........IE......KISS UR ASS!!!
And after kissin ur dirty bloody ass....stay away from my family....i dun wanna them be stenched wif ur stinky mouth........
*breathe....breathe......*
ok...i'm cool......juz to let it out.......
ok......i realised i'm startin to pms-in again......bad choice....i'm in the pluckin heads off mood....the next person who come n tok to me n pissed me off...
YOU DIE!!!!.......u'll die the most bloodiest death eva.........
wahahahaha............okie....i noe......i shall restrict this to "Friends"..........
or else.....i'll be pluckin favian's head off..................
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