Paradoxical World

Unknowingly, I've neglected my blog and let spider webs grow....

These few months, a lot of things have happened. So many that I do not have the time to blog down my thoughts and feelings. (Hopefully I'm able to catch up with some entries soon).

As of now, nothing is more concerning to me than my relocation to Shanghai for a year.

What will happen to me?

I would also like to know the answer.

A lot of mix feelings, while I welcome this new challenge, at the same time I can't help wondering if making this step might be a mistake. Of course, at this point in time, there's no turning back and no time to "regret", so I just have to look forward and go for it.

A lot of preparation work to do, I've been through half of it, which consist of flying to and fro for the past few months to familiarize the place, to restructure my team, to adapt to the living standard and lifestyle there, not forgetting the "technical" part which includes going through the "horrific" health check up in Shanghai, and not to mention more to come "experiences" after I move there!

Time flies, and I'm going to fly there next week. Well, actually I'm suppose to fly there today, however due to the late submission of my passport for visa processing, I did not book my flight for fear that I may not get my passport in time.

Now, I'm in a mess. I've yet to pack my stuff for relocation. On top of that, I've also to pack my stuff to move out of my current residence. And with this tight timing, I seriously wonder how I would manage.

Anyway, for now, I just want to relax a little before I start to plan and do some serious "action" to get things done.

Wish me luck!

My v-day present - card and a mysterious gift

that's the gift - stress cow!

Whose eyes are bigger, mine or his?

Or MBH's? lolx

Can you make out what the message is? :)

What happened to the service industry here?

What kind of service it is when while a customer is browsing at some products from the shelf, the sales assistant actually come in between the customer and the products to start rearranging those products as though the customer is invisible?!
It maybe that the customer is really invisible, but after that customer reaches out to take a product from the shelf to browse and to make her presence known, why can't the SA jolly well step aside?!

What kind of service it is when wherever place the customer goes within the shop, the sales assistant follow her everywhere she goes despite the customer saying politely that she doesn't require any assistance and would certainly ask for it when she wants it?!
By "sticking" to the customer everywhere they go is it really a sign of "good" service?! How would the customer feels if she was constantly being followed and "monitored"?!

What kind of service it is when a customer is walking around to browse at the products, and the sales assistant walk right straight from behind the customer and cut abruptly in front of the customer and make a "tsk" sound after walking pass the customer?!
If the SA is not interested to serve, then why the hell is she in the shop to be a hindrance to the consumers?!

If you don't take pride in your job, or can't even have the basic courtesy to treat customers with the least respect, or have no idea how to serve a customer, then for goodness sake, DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT go into service line. Please save the consumers these agony to have to deal with lousy services. It simply SUCKS!

Yet another year has passed and you turned 5 this year!

Yiyi wish you healthy and happy always!

*gimme a 5!*

As if dealing with work 8 hours a day is not enough, dealing with difficult people in office on top of that is even more challenging (and taxing).

For the past 2 weeks which my manager is not around, I'm the next in-line person to be in charge of the department's daily operations. As it is end of quarter and beginning of a new quarter, people are fighting very hard to meet the target before moving on to the next quarter.

Communication has never been easy, especially when having the need for clear communication and yet at the same time ensuring the intended message is conveyed across to the right audience. Most importantly, the intended message conveyed that the recipient receive and hear have to be the same from the sender, otherwise it will lead to miscommunication and misunderstanding as a result in the end.

The intended message not put across, happened to me twice within these 2 weeks. Actually, it's not my intention to have such situations happened. However, when your higher management did not convey clearly what needs to be done or not, it can result miscommunication and misunderstanding within the subordinates.

I hate to use this cliche, but both situations, I'm really the "victim" here. I'm merely did what I was told (and I analyse that there's nothing wrong with carrying out these instructions from my boss's boss since it's logical to me too), only in return to exchange for "accusation" and "sacarcism" from the senior mgr of that team concern. Although he did not express that openly, I'm not naive as though it's my 1st day at work not knowing what he actually meant in his "personal" emails to me.

To me, being in control and the strong urge to know everything is not the way to manage and lead a team efficiently. Especially when this urge of having the strong urge to be in total control of every tiny bitsy things is certainly making the other team members fearful of offending this control freak manager which lead to the team members always having to be on their toes, and constant watchout for whatever things they do and whatever word they say, just to avoid having any conflict or getting into trouble with him. I certainly would not wish to work in such circumstances.

Being an effective manager or leader, has to be open in the way things are being handled or communicated and not by instilling fear in others just to gain control. Not only he has to be receptive, he also has to have enough E.Q (which this person is totally lacking!!!) to deal with any unforesee circumstances coming his way.

Anyway, I know I will have a "battle" to fight next week when he's back from his sales trip. Though not sure what exactly will happen, I know I have to prepare myself "mentally" to tackle whatever comes my way.

In the meantime, I'm just so "stress" out with the daily handling of ops issues and my workplan overview to be bothered by 这个小人！

Today is our 1st anniversary together, and I'm so touched by 老婆's gesture and surprise!

Little did I expect 老婆 to surprise me with a gift and a personalised card made by him!

Last evening after I just came back to room from shower, he 'tricked' me into going to my bag to find my wallet and instead, I saw a package!

A personalised card and a mysteriously wrapped gift

What could it be?!

Body Shop's mini toiletries set! My favourite - Aqua Lily! ^0^

Card made by 老婆, so cute! I love the cartoons! lolx!

His draft before drawing on the actual card...

I'm so touched when I 1st saw the card that tears of joy actually roll down my cheeks! I'm really at a loss of word as I didn't expect him to do all these for me. Not to mention earlier last evening we even had a small tiff over trivial matters....
"Shamefully", I did not prepare anything for him as my thought is just to spend some quality time with him, watching movie, having a simple dinner etc. Nevertheless, all I wanna say to 老婆 is............

I LUP U!

May our love and bonding last us forever! ^0^

Hmmm, I've not been blogging for close to 2 months. Bad blogger I am....

Well, a lot of things have happened for the past few weeks which left me quite exhausted.

Work, taken a toll in me, require a lot of my time and energy. Not forget to mention that MBH has resigned and his last working day was end of March. Have to get use to not seeing him that often as we used to. A lot of trying time after his resignation, not wishing to go into details at this post.

On top of the above, a little comfort to look forward to, I will be going to Tokyo office for retraining the new COs! Great! Not just on the context of work will I be going to Japan, I will also be going on the context of fulfilling my unfinished trip!

Last year, around this time I should be planning to go Japan for holiday. Blame it on the untimely H1N1 outbreak that cause my Japan trip to postpone. Little did I expect that this year it's really happening!

I strongly believe that everything happen for a reason. Last year, though I didn't manage to go Japan as planned, I ended up being with MBH (unplanned!). This year, because of work, I get to visit my favourite destination under company's expense! Therefore I will be extending another week on personal expense to places (Kyoto and Osaka, on top of Tokyo) I long to visit!

E'nuff said, I better start planning as I've less than a month before I left for Japan!

Now that I'm back in the cold winter of Amsterdam, I really miss my dear more than anything. I must admit that though I'm accustomed to travelling, I'm not like my other peers who always miss local food or stuff, but as far as I'm concern, I'm missing MBH a great deal, especially in the cold winter which would be nice if I could have a warm hugz from him.

Chronicles for the past few days all sum up here below:

18 Feb - Set off for Amsterdam, MBH sending me off at the airport. Almost cried out for not able to see him for the next 8 days.

19 Feb - arrived AMS,had a surprisingly good flight with KLM (bad experience from the past), checked in to my tiniest room that I've stayed of my life (not too bad, apart from the space) in early morning,slept for a couple of hours before taking a walk to Albert Cuyp Market and joining a free walking tour in the city.

Met a new friend, a Taiwanese girl studying in Tokyo but now staying in Lyon as an exchange student. Interesting.

Night tour to the red light district, heavy snow and weather conditions, still managed to survive through the night.

20 Feb - Signed up a guided tour, a day trip to Antwerp and Brussels. Met a Hong Kong girl who is working in Shanghai. Loved the architectures of Belgium though I can't say the same about their fries.

21 Feb - Checked out of my tiny room to move in to hotel arranged by company. Nice big room, though internet is not free in the room and hotel location is out of the way from the city. By this time, I've more or less familiar with AMS and has a way with navigating myself while here. Pretty cool considering the fact that I'm always directionless during our trip in Italy with MBH. LOLX!

Met Des for lunch after his arrival, shopping for awhile and dinner before hitting the sack back to our individual hotel. (he's staying in central area whereas poor me stay in far south of AMS)

22 Feb - Went to office to tie up some loose ends at work. Had a constructive get-together session with some colleagues here. Cool!

Rush off to do some shopping for my mgr before the shops closed (shops close quite early around 1800hrs except for Thurs which most shops open till 2100hrs)

23 Feb - 1st day of training for the workshop, quite heavy for a start as it talked about vision of the company, what we think it should be and how we think we can get there...etc... woah!

Social drinking and networking dinner straight after the training, long day today before heading back to hotel,walking against snow and at the same time trying to keep flying snow out of my mouth and hoodie still intact over my head.

More to come for the next 3 days, I'm certainly open and up for it. At the end of today, I've seen a whole new perspective about myself,my job and how I can fit in and it certainly is useful for me. I realise that I have a lot to learn and keep up in order to stay competence to my current role with the company. Looking forward to more in time to come!

Side note: 23 Feb is my mum's birthday, it's a pity I couldn't get to spend some family time celebrating with her. Hereby wishing her a happy birthday, stay healthy and happy always!

Next to come: more up-to-date entries + few photos of this trip =)

my,my...I've not been a good blogger for the past few weeks (close to a month to be exact) as I've left my blog idle for quite some time.

Well,apart from my hectic schedule at work, I realise that I'm not as motivated to blog as I used to and I wonder why.

Sometimes, it comes down to the part whereby I am blogging for the sake of blogging and taking down details of what happened during the day instead of really wanting to blog and that's kind of...sad.

Hopefully I can get my life right back on track, just like what MBH has asked me: do I want to be "job focus" or "life focus"?

That really set me thinking...hmmm...

... will be a short and hectic month for me!

Not just the fact that it has only 28 days in total, there are also CNY holidays which we have 2 days PH.

1st week, there will be newcomer starting work which means training for them and it will takes up my time off my already busy and hectic schedule.

2nd week, my Ops mgr will be away for business trip to Japan, which also means that I will need to cover part of her job as the "main person" that other colleagues come to for operational issue.

3rd week is CNY which we have 2 days of PH that makes the week even shorter.

On top of that at 4th week, I will be going back to Amsterdam for a week's training and I will reach there 2 days earlier to have a short trip to nearby city (though till now I still have not decided and plan which city to go, and I certainly have not book my ticket yet.@@)

Oh, it is still winter right now till Feb which means I have to dig out my winter wear which I have nicely packed away!

...for this week.

Lack of quality sleep, hectic work schedule, "mis"communication with MBH...everything adds up to a toll in my tiredness.

Lack of quality sleep
- due to hectic work schedule (which brings me to my next point), I can't seem to get into deep sleep. My brain will still be working actively at night despite being in bed early.

Hectic work schedule
- being in the ops team, the nature of the job says it all. Ever-changing, even if a plan has been devised, will only end up having to revise it again. No matter how "change-proof" the plan is, there will bound to be changes. Just when I'm beginning to get the hang of it, there will be new decisions made by the management that will make my work plan topple off and have to replan again.

Communication with MBH
- lately, our communication seems to hitch. It's either I'm too meticulous, or he's just being a guy which communcation is not his forte. Each time I ask a question or make a comment, the least I would expect will be a response from him which he always either stare blank or just no response from him, as though I'm talking to a wall. Is that too much to ask for him to respond or even a short reply?

Maybe it's because we are seeing each other literally everyday, and there's no chance to "absence make the heart goes fonder", that's why our communcation style seems to come to a nought. I do at times feel tired of talking or trying to communicate to him, to the extent that I just want to keep my mouth shut and be a zombie. I didn't realise that communication with a partner can be that tiring and difficult.

Today, MBH is meeting his poly friends for catch up and gathering. Late in the evening, he suddenly dropped me a msg to ask if I want to join, which I told him that since he did mention to me before that he don't feel comfortable having his gf around when he's with friends (cos he can't talk "freely" with his friends) and he also mentioned that I don't know his friends so no point for me to go there as I will be sitting there doing nothing, so I told him that I'm not going.

An hour or 2 later, he called me to ask me again. I asked him why, he said that since I have nothing to do at home and his friends wanted to see me, so he asked me to join.

The moment I hear this, my heart plunge. I see it as just because he want to "grant" his friends the wish to see me, that's why he called me to be there, and I certainly don't like this reason to be there. I feel as though I'm just there as a "product" to be show off to others. If it's because he will be happy if I'm there and he really want me to, then I will be more than willing to travel all the way to central no matter how late it is. So I suppressed my disappointment in him on this, and I told him that I'm not going.

I think that he's surprised by my reply because I'm surprised that he actually ask me why I didn't want to go, since he's not a person to be inquisitive. I just told him briefly that I don't feel like going there to meet his friends just because they requested for it and not because he really want me to be there in the first place. Then I asked him if he's going to meet me later than our agreed time, that's why he wanted me to be there. He admitted that the time we will be meeting will be slightly later than decided as he want to chill out with his friends.

I told him that if that's the case, it's fine for me not to meet him today since he's going out with his friends. I told him so because I don't want him to feel restricted and feel compromised that he has to leave early from his gathering just to meet me. On top of that, I certainly won't want him to think I'm "sticky" and just want to occupy his time. I won't want him to get sick of me or this r/ship as a result.

Oh f***! Sometimes, I wish I can just get away from everything from here!

...to my new role at work!

Though I'm not exactly at the management level, I'm considered in the mid-level management, so as to say, part of my decisions made will affect the rest of my team mates.

At this new level, what's expected of me (especially after my year-end appraisal yesterday with my Ops manager) are as follow:

- to take on a more leading role, i.e to lead by example
- involve more in-depth in training newcomers
- manage a team of coordinators (currently I'm assisting my Ops mgr in managing a team of 12 people which more addition is expected for the next few months!), including doing monthly quality checks on their work, providing support and mentoring them.
- counselling and providing guidance for my team to "grow" within the company (soft skills vs hard skills)
- involve in the company in a more commercial way (in the past, my involvement revoles around operational aspect. However with this new role, I have to brush up on my commercial skills so as to manage and lead my team more efficiently.)
- participating in recruiting process i.e sit in during interviews, accessing and deciding the right candidates to employ (tog.with my Ops mgr of course!)
- liasing with colleagues in head office on communicating and implementing of procedures
- source of support and guide to colleagues from other offices (somehow I got a "reputation" in Australia office that apart from my Ops mgr, I can also be a guidance and advisor to them!)
- occasional travelling for work
- attending training courses (heard that there's 1 training next month in amsterdam, hopefully it doesn't coincide with CNY!)
- and many more yet to come!

At this moment, my momentum at work is in a mess. I can't say it's a HUGE mess, but somehow as compare to my previous role, this time it's really unscheduled. It's also due to the nature of the job (operations) that makes it challenging as operations work is never the same and it's forever changing and non-uniform (and that's what I like about my job). Also, now is also the transition period whereby a lot of things need cleaning up first before I can start to look more in-depth to research and introduce new procedures to improve the operational function of my team. Things like retraining for existing staff, proper training guide to newcomers, training materials that are up-to-date and organised, setting up procedures for certain tasks etc are all in the pipeline and on my to-do list.

As the saying goes, "more haste, less speed" thus I have to constantly remind myself that as much as I would like to get all things done and fixed fast before I can proceed, I have to make sure that I don't speed things up at the expense of giving up quality.

Therefore for now, I have to learn how to prioritise my tasks, manage my time wisely, and to set up an action plan for myself before I end up in a crisis!

Gambatte~~~~!

MBH finally decided to buy the long talked about Nintendo Wii!

After considering for a long period of time (2 or 3 months, at least before we went to our Europe trip), he decided to go for it.

All in all, he spent a total of S$620 for the standard package that is korea set that comes with a cooling fan, hard mob and wii plus board.

Although I welcome the idea of having this new gadget into our life (oh well, what can I expect from guys who simply love gadgets just as we women love bags and shoes!), I do wonder if it will have an impact on our r/ship as I'm pretty sure weekends will surely be revolve around Nintendo Wii from now on, would we even make time for outings like what we used to? Not forgetting the fact that MBH all along is quite budget constraint, will this expenditure means we have to cut down or cut out our outings since going out means having to spend $?

The flu bug has visited me at the start of this new year!

Recently, although I just came back from Europe trip (I don't think I got the H1N1 :x), I'm quite well until today when I step into the office.

It could be the ventilation of the office that is not good as constantly we always have people falling sick easily. As I just shifted to my new work desk which happens to be directly under the air-con duct, I got a strong feeling that it could be due to this very reason.

To make matter worse, today also marks the first day for me to give training to the newcomers as an Operational Team Leader, so you could imagine what a "bad" impression I left to them when I have to sneeze within sentences (or words rather). I have to be interrupted with my own sneeze each time I say a few words, and I could hardly finish my full sentence without having to sneeze a couple of time. Hopefully they are understanding that their trainer is not in the best condition and has to make do with whatever (in)complete information given to them during the training. :x

Tomorrow's training will be on the topic of my specialise area, no coincident that it also happen to be a very "dry" and "technical" subject that requires me to be in tip top condition. Therefore, I could afford to take MC tomorrow, thus I plan to retire early tonight to catch more quality rest after I pop in the flu medicine.

So for now, I just want to stay in bed and rest my poor nose and throat after I've finish my other tasks for tonight.

Ah Choo!

A new start of the year, new challenges expected ahead.

Year 2009 has been a fruitful one despite all the difficulties and challenges encountered. Challenges at work, promotions, handling r/ship with colleagues, rough patches on BGR, new found r/ship with MBH, our new roles at work etc certainly make year 2009 a spicey and eventful year for me. =)

I've certainly learnt a lot in the past year. Though last year has been a roller coaster ride for me especially for matters of the heart, I'm glad that I've survived through! I hope MBH and I have many more good years and enjoyable moments ahead of us and may our r/ship blossom!

What's new year without a new list of new year resolution? (oh well, I don't even dare to review how many resolutions have I cleared from last year list!)

1. Be happy.
2. Stay healthy.
3. Be nice to everyone.
4. Treasure my loved ones and friends around me.
5. Another trip to Japan-Kyoto, Osaka.
6. Master up my Japanese (Yes, I know I've said this umpteenth time!)
7. Happy relationship with MBH
8. Stop procrastinating.
9. Upgrade and update my work skills periodically.
10. Save up for rainy days diligently.
11. Holiday with MBH - Bangkok, Taiwan, HK?
12. Shift house.
13. The list goes on... ....

at close to midnight to Europe!

Time really flies, and before I knew it, it's almost end of the year!

Tonight I'll be catching SQ flight to Amsterdam for my 1 hectic work week which the moment I touch down at 0600am (AMS time), I'll have to go for my hotel check in, wash up a little before going to office for work!

MBH will fly on Tues and reach AMS on Wed (where we will meet at same hotel of course!) which his schedule is less hectic than me.

It will be a full work week for me, or rather, 4 full working days as Mon to Thur will be full day busy with workshops, trainings and meetings which on Thur night will be our annually x'mas party whereby colleagues from all over the world meet together to have fun.

After which on Friday, MBH and I will be free for our personal holiday!

We will stay over 1 night on Fri (18 Dec) at AMS which the next day we will be flying over to Italy for our holiday!

18 Dec - 1 night at AMS
19 Dec - Fly to Rome, overnight 3 nights
22 Dec - Railway train to Florence, overnight 3 nights
25 Dec - Fly back to AMS, overnight 1 night
26 Dec - Fly back to SIN

So looking forward to our holiday right now!!! Yoohoo, here we come! =)

We met at Bugis, and walked over to Shaw building together.

It is also the place which we once had our meal together before we are officially an item, so it's more like reminiscing good old times. =)

So we went to Roma Deli (a vegetarian italian cafe) for our meal:

waiting for our meal

MBH staring at the cake he got for me after our meal....

"hmmm, let me test taste it for MBH first...slurp"

nice little heart-shaped mousse cake from Four Leaves!

making a wish before blowing out the candle

simply delicious!

Thank you my dear, it's certainly memorable! =)

With so many unexpected events occurring and sprouting out, it's no surprise that I've been "living in crisis" for last week and this week.

Last minute notification to arrange trainings for newcomers (on top of my daily operations tasks, also impromptu) left me off-balance from my work schedule that has been planned out for the week. Although I know this is part and parcel of operations, still, I find myself very press for time, especially this period is also the critical period for me to complete my QCs for the coordinators so that I can be in time for their monthly review next week!

I can't imagine if I were to convert to do full time operations stuff, will I still be living in this "crisis" as I know that coming year there will be more challenges and changes awaiting for me.

On top of the above, as of 01 Dec, MBH has been promoted to become a coordinator which means to say we will be working much much closer as compare to before! I can't help wondering if this will gradually affect our personal life given the complexity and "complication" of our already complicated r/ship. Luckily, we have talked about this a few time which MBH assures me that he see it more of a positive challenge which he also treasure our personal r/ship dearly. *touched*

Anyway at this moment, just one word to describe how I feel right now:


TIRED!

Sweet breakfast for today (yet again!)

This time round, it's pancake mixture with milo and quacker oats!
















The product turns out delicious!

We even have the pancake with ice-cream! On top of that, I had it with preserved veg while MBH has it with curry! *weird taste!*

*slurp!*