Tuesday, November 06, 2007
Wednesday, October 31, 2007
Monday, October 22, 2007
Friday
Went Tony Romans @ Suntec to have dinner as his younger sister having birthday there.
Just a normal dinner...treated by his dad. Total number of ppl who went was ard 17 including all the uncles, aunties,siblings, and what you call family members.
It's quite a record, considering we didnt meet from Monday to Thursday, and for Friday, we actually met up for that pathetic few hours, not alone, but with people around...even when driving me home. Don't get me wrong. I am not against being with his family members or friends.Maybe it's just that out of 5 working days, i only wanted 1 day, but he can't even give me.Total bill came up to around 770++ bucks. Still alright, considered that it's 17 people's share.
Saturday
Ended up in quarreling again.Coz he sms me promised to meet ard 2:30. but he called me up at 3:30, stating he's still at home and he will come over soon. Was disappointed. I asked him, "u dun feel guilty at all?". He's not. When ask me where i want to go, i already told him, i got no place to go the previous day, but he still ask me when i ans him this ans again.
When hang up, I was so disappointed and dulan that i sms him , think dun meet le lah.u say meet 230 now already 330, u not guilty at all plus i no place to go. He didnt sms back till a while later...asking if i want go dinner with him and boy later at msia.Ha..
Quarrel and quarrel.Sianx...Night time spent 3 hrs plus to east side to find him.But he's outside with his friend drinking.I need to ask him to meet me to settle our stuffs.I dun understand really.
Sunday
Took cab down. Another disappointing day.My hunger doesnt seems to affect him.Though I am hungry, he can say let him lie down a while and rest a while.
I got to meet my dearest brother, WXB aka NOOB at downtown east today too.haha... but while we were goin off, he walk next to him, leaving mi behind.so disappointing.but he duno.
Went Tony Romans @ Suntec to have dinner as his younger sister having birthday there.
Just a normal dinner...treated by his dad. Total number of ppl who went was ard 17 including all the uncles, aunties,siblings, and what you call family members.
It's quite a record, considering we didnt meet from Monday to Thursday, and for Friday, we actually met up for that pathetic few hours, not alone, but with people around...even when driving me home. Don't get me wrong. I am not against being with his family members or friends.Maybe it's just that out of 5 working days, i only wanted 1 day, but he can't even give me.Total bill came up to around 770++ bucks. Still alright, considered that it's 17 people's share.
Saturday
Ended up in quarreling again.Coz he sms me promised to meet ard 2:30. but he called me up at 3:30, stating he's still at home and he will come over soon. Was disappointed. I asked him, "u dun feel guilty at all?". He's not. When ask me where i want to go, i already told him, i got no place to go the previous day, but he still ask me when i ans him this ans again.
When hang up, I was so disappointed and dulan that i sms him , think dun meet le lah.u say meet 230 now already 330, u not guilty at all plus i no place to go. He didnt sms back till a while later...asking if i want go dinner with him and boy later at msia.Ha..
Quarrel and quarrel.Sianx...Night time spent 3 hrs plus to east side to find him.But he's outside with his friend drinking.I need to ask him to meet me to settle our stuffs.I dun understand really.
Sunday
Took cab down. Another disappointing day.My hunger doesnt seems to affect him.Though I am hungry, he can say let him lie down a while and rest a while.
I got to meet my dearest brother, WXB aka NOOB at downtown east today too.haha... but while we were goin off, he walk next to him, leaving mi behind.so disappointing.but he duno.
Tuesday, October 09, 2007
Halox world...back to blog a bit..
Yesterday just had a gd chat with my bro (game bro)...
Been so long really, since i updated with his news...Remember last time when we are still both gaming in WMO, we shared stuffs together..i mean problems...and as a bro, he realli took care of me when ppl bully me in game ><
Other than that, we also got chat on phone.The only thing is , ya i didnt see him b4...
And if not for him, i wunt meet "him" also ba.
He actualli chatted with me til ard 4:41am...coz i cant slp aso...n he givin mi advice..
We talked abt karma...yah...came to this conclusion...shld be karma...
i dunno how 2 cont blog...i woke up, with some hope of he fetchin mi to work today coz he told mi tat yesterday.called him.
"I no fetch u go work.i not goin work today coz yest nite after dinner i sprain my leg..my legiment there..swollen"
i was awake til 4:41am +++ n i duno anythin abt it.
"sry no tell u"
Yesterday just had a gd chat with my bro (game bro)...
Been so long really, since i updated with his news...Remember last time when we are still both gaming in WMO, we shared stuffs together..i mean problems...and as a bro, he realli took care of me when ppl bully me in game ><
Other than that, we also got chat on phone.The only thing is , ya i didnt see him b4...
And if not for him, i wunt meet "him" also ba.
He actualli chatted with me til ard 4:41am...coz i cant slp aso...n he givin mi advice..
We talked abt karma...yah...came to this conclusion...shld be karma...
i dunno how 2 cont blog...i woke up, with some hope of he fetchin mi to work today coz he told mi tat yesterday.called him.
"I no fetch u go work.i not goin work today coz yest nite after dinner i sprain my leg..my legiment there..swollen"
i was awake til 4:41am +++ n i duno anythin abt it.
"sry no tell u"
Wednesday, September 12, 2007
Mood : A bit disappointed...a bit sad...a bit of everything...
Currently now in office, suppose to get the stupid abstract/proposal submission form to work...but alex still not yet back ...probably still at arcade playing that san guo zhi 2 card game...Anyway, just feel like blogging thus here's the post...
For a start, i really wanted to blog this post happili, but guess i can't coz just few mins/hr ago, someone gave me a last minute "surprise" again.haix..nvm abt tat...i'll juz cont...
On 30th August 2007, went IMM with him.For wad..i no longer remember...maybe juz walk walk coz once again, I was being asked the same question "Where you want to go?", and also, maybe i was finding somewhere near so that he wunt be so tired...but well...these are stuffs that he'll nvr understd and know..or appreciate..
He bought this RO figurine for me at comic connections...cute and i like coz its RO mah...den wanted to find the display case for it...so went Diaso...but unfortunately i bought the wrong one with steps...the figurine too big to go in...haix...but well...i saw my colleague, yin jie there with her husband to be...small world..
Halfway through the shopping or walk walk..he went outside to find seat and i was there shoppin by myself when i meet yj..
I duno, all of the sudden i felt so alone.Wads the point of fetchin me and driving me here to shop by myself?my brain are filled with all these stuffs while shoppin alone...but well again, he nvr know.
He come find me when he cant find a seat outside .Then brought mi to the spects there and start trying them on and take photo =.= .Anyway after which went home i think...
Saturday 1st September 2007
Went celebrate jason birthday with the usual university gang which includes big and small alvin, zen, jason,wai wai, alfred, mingli, xin min, justina, me and dap.not sure who i missed out but roughly these ppl bah...
went steamboat @ seah st @ bugis den went shenton ktv.
Currently now in office, suppose to get the stupid abstract/proposal submission form to work...but alex still not yet back ...probably still at arcade playing that san guo zhi 2 card game...Anyway, just feel like blogging thus here's the post...
For a start, i really wanted to blog this post happili, but guess i can't coz just few mins/hr ago, someone gave me a last minute "surprise" again.haix..nvm abt tat...i'll juz cont...
On 30th August 2007, went IMM with him.For wad..i no longer remember...maybe juz walk walk coz once again, I was being asked the same question "Where you want to go?", and also, maybe i was finding somewhere near so that he wunt be so tired...but well...these are stuffs that he'll nvr understd and know..or appreciate..
He bought this RO figurine for me at comic connections...cute and i like coz its RO mah...den wanted to find the display case for it...so went Diaso...but unfortunately i bought the wrong one with steps...the figurine too big to go in...haix...but well...i saw my colleague, yin jie there with her husband to be...small world..
Halfway through the shopping or walk walk..he went outside to find seat and i was there shoppin by myself when i meet yj..
I duno, all of the sudden i felt so alone.Wads the point of fetchin me and driving me here to shop by myself?my brain are filled with all these stuffs while shoppin alone...but well again, he nvr know.
He come find me when he cant find a seat outside .Then brought mi to the spects there and start trying them on and take photo =.= .Anyway after which went home i think...
Saturday 1st September 2007
Went celebrate jason birthday with the usual university gang which includes big and small alvin, zen, jason,wai wai, alfred, mingli, xin min, justina, me and dap.not sure who i missed out but roughly these ppl bah...
went steamboat @ seah st @ bugis den went shenton ktv.
Sunday 9th September 2007
Didnt meet him today coz he wake up no car come find mi and ledi so late, which is ard 4pm?Went to have hair cut at westmall and perm by myself.Day before went out with alfred, jason, xm and dap to bt timah to have supper.He didnt meet mi coz he was having those company "jia to" at loyang.
He did call me up, but after like few sentences, he got nth else to say and we hang up.He didnt even bother abt what happen to me the whole day, which area of bt timah i go to etc.He didnt slp earli coz he went to fetch his dad from airport.I duno if he sms me at 2 plus is coz he haven slp (coz fetch dad) or he specialli waited for me home.I choose to believe the 1st reason, reason being:Hope too high will disappointment higher.But well, i didnt ask him and he duno abt all these too.
Sunday nite we have a quarrel...ya..no hear wrong...he quarrelled again.This time really made me feel so dam sad and disappointed with him.I smsed ah boy a msg askin him to take care of him..coz i feel that i m onli giving him stress , letting him very stress.I duno if ah boy received it coz there was no replies but this goes to show how helpless and how sad i am.I am realli ready to let go anytime.
Monday he woke up by himself.Coz he goin for reservice.A thought just pop into my mind.I feel so useless as a GF.A ns reservice can make him auto wake, but not a gf.Instead a gf had to wake up earli to wake him up to fetch her.This goes to show how important i am to him.After work he came to fetch me.It is only then that he knew i perm n cut my hair.and he's my bf.
Anyway he proceeded to ask mi the same question, "Where you wan to go".It always end up with the same answer.I m so tired of thinkin.So pek check of hearing this qn.So sick n tired of all these.But he nvr knew.
Ended up going Harbourfront coz he meeting his dad to buy tv for his sis.First time in my life i saw how his dad care for him.Was quite stunt.And for the 1st time, I felt tat his dad is a very gd man.He treated us eat at a nonya restaurant at Vivocity with the bill coming up to ard 140 for 3 pax...and while ordering the list of food, he's always asking me what i want to eat den he order.And while eating, he keep put food on my plate.
After having our dinner, we went to have ice cream.Decided to go haagen daaz coz i got 10 voucher and his dad likes the ice cream there(he say 1).Upon siting, the waiter came and gave us the menu.Then he continue place a phamplet in front of mi, telling me about the mooncake they selling now and the prices etc.After the waiter introduce finish and walked away, his dad asked what was it about.Thus i told him briefly they saying abt their mooncake.The next sentence stunted me.His dad then ask me "you wan a not?I buy for u".still recovering from the shock, i quickly reply say no nid uncle, very expensive.
Tuesday 11 Septemeber 2007
Woke him up coz scared he cant wake up.Den went working as usual.He came fetch me after that.As usual those qns again.I told him i got no where to go + dun feel like eating.He told me the same.After which then he say go IMM lor.Seeing him so tired + IMM so big later he shop more tired, so i suggested go Liang court.Since there got audio house can see tv...and also new place mah.Halfway there, seeing the jam, out of concern i told him why not we dun go liang court le...we go ur hse lor.I was being said by him for being ren xin.How shld i feel i duno.Felt like the biggest fool, but once again I kept silence.And throughout the car trip, we were both like silent.He dun give or make an effort to even tok to me.I tok to him when i was on car, for like 5 to 10mins, like tokin to a wall.without much replies and much concern from him.den i kept silence.
Wednesday today
he told mi yesterday he will fetch me to Ritz Carlton for jason grad.But after i confirm with alfred he nid not come pick me up, he said he on mc cannot leave house so no fetch me.
Wednesday, August 22, 2007
Hello world...
Been sometime since i came to update on my happenings and rants..
Life is still going on as usual...it always is...never stopping for anyone...
Went hospital with my mom and dad on Monday..it is only then i came to realise..mount elizabeth really charge dam high for the ward and treatment...and the ward isnt all as peaceful as it seems..services too..wasnt as excellent as it claimed.
We can actually spend more than 10minutes waiting for a pillow and when we ask the nurse wheres the pillow..., she can took it out from a cupboard nearby...
The person still tell us he will get for us a pillow.and he disappeared.
It is aso only then that i realised how much pain there is for the treatment..and how much courage is required.
thanx to him..for fetchin me n jie fu n jie n lucky back home after a full day @ hospital with my dad.I know he's tired...
Yesterday, Tuesday, he was down with throat pain and tiredness i think...went home ard in the afternoon..he even offered to let me drive his car...but too bad i m still unconfident of myself plus i duno how to park...thus didnt take the car from him.
Went to find him after work...took the transport to tampines..after which mrt to pasir ris and bus to his hse..bought ju hua cha and barley for him coz he's quite heaty...and bought ard 7 doughnuts..with the thought of giving his family eat...but all ended up in his fridge.
n 2 with me
proceed home ard 1045 with his mom...coz she wanted to take disc from her parents in law there..after which we went to selegie there to have teochew porridge...one fish tail..one vege...one pork..one lala...one salted egg..2 rice n 1 porridge and 1 coke...total up ard 25.50...and its not that big plate aso.....her mom treat..den after which walk over to buy douhua..but douhua was out of stock le..too late + sell finish ..thus settle for a grass jelly drink..
On the car, her mom was telling him when her operation is and askin him to fetch her...after which..she continues...call her elder sis out together aso..when we go shopping or watch movie blah...coz scared she will anyhow think and her fren like 2 only.wellx...not that i dun wan ask her out or wad...but ...we dun even have sometime for ourselves.....but again...wad can i say..i can onli keep quiet.
it's like askin elder sister out for shoppin, watch movie...askin younger sister out ktv coz she aso very cham...very tied down...den fetchin elder bro back coz area that area...fetchin mom back from work...helpin auntie with groceries...wellx...so where's our own time?
noone say that i very cham also?
I know..his family are all gd...all of them gd to me too...i m not complaining abt helping them or wad...wad i m askin for, probably, is just some free time to ourselves...not a single day i can go out with him full for 1 day..alone me n him..happili..its either there's errands to run, or his face will be so tired and his face will be so sianx and we'll be walkin without talkin.
i duno how long will this continue..
21st Aug, 22nd Aug or anywhere near these dates...are the days where i feel dam insecure...bcos its his ex birthday.I've been wondering if he will be meeting his ex or sending her sms or even callin her...I duno..i'm afraid to ask.I'm scared its true and i will end up hurting myself.
So now i can only think and think.
Sighx.so tired.feel like slpin...
Update next time..
-wishin-
Been sometime since i came to update on my happenings and rants..
Life is still going on as usual...it always is...never stopping for anyone...
Went hospital with my mom and dad on Monday..it is only then i came to realise..mount elizabeth really charge dam high for the ward and treatment...and the ward isnt all as peaceful as it seems..services too..wasnt as excellent as it claimed.
We can actually spend more than 10minutes waiting for a pillow and when we ask the nurse wheres the pillow..., she can took it out from a cupboard nearby...
The person still tell us he will get for us a pillow.and he disappeared.
It is aso only then that i realised how much pain there is for the treatment..and how much courage is required.
thanx to him..for fetchin me n jie fu n jie n lucky back home after a full day @ hospital with my dad.I know he's tired...
Yesterday, Tuesday, he was down with throat pain and tiredness i think...went home ard in the afternoon..he even offered to let me drive his car...but too bad i m still unconfident of myself plus i duno how to park...thus didnt take the car from him.
Went to find him after work...took the transport to tampines..after which mrt to pasir ris and bus to his hse..bought ju hua cha and barley for him coz he's quite heaty...and bought ard 7 doughnuts..with the thought of giving his family eat...but all ended up in his fridge.
n 2 with me
proceed home ard 1045 with his mom...coz she wanted to take disc from her parents in law there..after which we went to selegie there to have teochew porridge...one fish tail..one vege...one pork..one lala...one salted egg..2 rice n 1 porridge and 1 coke...total up ard 25.50...and its not that big plate aso.....her mom treat..den after which walk over to buy douhua..but douhua was out of stock le..too late + sell finish ..thus settle for a grass jelly drink..
On the car, her mom was telling him when her operation is and askin him to fetch her...after which..she continues...call her elder sis out together aso..when we go shopping or watch movie blah...coz scared she will anyhow think and her fren like 2 only.wellx...not that i dun wan ask her out or wad...but ...we dun even have sometime for ourselves.....but again...wad can i say..i can onli keep quiet.
it's like askin elder sister out for shoppin, watch movie...askin younger sister out ktv coz she aso very cham...very tied down...den fetchin elder bro back coz area that area...fetchin mom back from work...helpin auntie with groceries...wellx...so where's our own time?
noone say that i very cham also?
I know..his family are all gd...all of them gd to me too...i m not complaining abt helping them or wad...wad i m askin for, probably, is just some free time to ourselves...not a single day i can go out with him full for 1 day..alone me n him..happili..its either there's errands to run, or his face will be so tired and his face will be so sianx and we'll be walkin without talkin.
i duno how long will this continue..
21st Aug, 22nd Aug or anywhere near these dates...are the days where i feel dam insecure...bcos its his ex birthday.I've been wondering if he will be meeting his ex or sending her sms or even callin her...I duno..i'm afraid to ask.I'm scared its true and i will end up hurting myself.
So now i can only think and think.
Sighx.so tired.feel like slpin...
Update next time..
-wishin-
Friday, August 03, 2007
Been quite a long time since i come to do any updates on my life...happenings and etc...
A lot of stuffs actually happened these few weeks and months...
Let me recall...Jason have been back from Australia and we all met up to have a simple dinner @ cathay ...people present were :Dap,Mingli,Wai wai,Justina, me, Alfred, Jason.
The feeling is so nice...as though everyone is back to chat...catching up with each other after we parted off at Australia after our studies...Jason hasnt change much , still himself..As for me n him...things are gettin from bad to worst...we can be quarrelin at a frequency of like 2 days once or worst, 1 day once..
However for now, things are somehow getting better...I do hope it's not temporary like last time again..but I also dun dare to hope too much too..Daddy's condition wasnt getting on well after the chemo that time...another cell ard 2cm + was found and thin thin cells are found too.Hopefully the medicine will help out with it and control it..Felt quite depressed yesterday...
The last weekend went sim lim square...before going out of my house, i actually asked my mom wad she wanna buy.She replied with 50 cdrs...Knowing that she's doin the so call "GOOD STUFFS" again..i just say her back..."for your those so call shi xiong again?duno why u everytime help them buy and not they burn themself...100 pieces all that..."And then guess wad..?I am being accused of "zhao nie" if u all know wad it means...according to her so call BUDDHISM.But wad happen in the end?I still buy for her.It is SO CLEAR that her shi xiong all that is just using her to burn all stuffs...even my sister and brother are lazy to help her.and halo...my mom is not that power in computer?all her questions will come to me and end up i help?
but also..end up i get all this SHIT...nvm abt that...passed her the CDS and the next mornin..she wan quarrel again with me.This time i just in kitchen eating my medi...wad she tell me?Those cds are those chanting for 7th month etc..u like that say will add to the sins..then all those gd karmas will all gone.HALO...that's only ur thinkin and i think we do have our thinkin too?she's only makin mi more n more disappointed in her so call BUDDHISM.still...nvm abt tat...when i come home?wad did i get u knoe...another round...now sayin i always late home..when i was at home after work on mon..tue i aso reach home b4 11pm which is earlier than usual...just a dinner and movie at westmall.den the blaming starts say i dun care my father.WTH is tat?
I asked my sister hows my father...wad ans did i get..?like this lor
I asked my mother hows my father...wad ans did i get?aiya..dun ask already la.very fan la
I did tok to my dad and ask abt hows he's feeling.I did tried to stay at home to accompany him but he's at the horse racing there...so end up i m just an idiot helpin them look after their dog while they go out happili.And know wad?not i dun wan care...am i given a chance to?i wunt even know when my dad is staying in hospital for chemo and such..noone bother to inform mi.
everyone just blame stuffs on me..BUDDHISM?dam selfish teachings?onli living in their own life...tinkin that they are the only 1 with the correct views and everyone shld accept them.haha...For wad i wan treat them gd when everytime i m just a vent anger pot to them!?Noone listen to me tok at all..noone...no matter if it's advices from real life cases or wad..there r more to say..but i'm juz tired of typin it..
Work is getting more n more busier and stressful..
Everything is just getting more n more stressful...Even my colleagues say i look like ghost=.="
I just duno when all these will make mi collapse...
am realli dam tired..
A lot of stuffs actually happened these few weeks and months...
Let me recall...Jason have been back from Australia and we all met up to have a simple dinner @ cathay ...people present were :Dap,Mingli,Wai wai,Justina, me, Alfred, Jason.
The feeling is so nice...as though everyone is back to chat...catching up with each other after we parted off at Australia after our studies...Jason hasnt change much , still himself..As for me n him...things are gettin from bad to worst...we can be quarrelin at a frequency of like 2 days once or worst, 1 day once..
However for now, things are somehow getting better...I do hope it's not temporary like last time again..but I also dun dare to hope too much too..Daddy's condition wasnt getting on well after the chemo that time...another cell ard 2cm + was found and thin thin cells are found too.Hopefully the medicine will help out with it and control it..Felt quite depressed yesterday...
The last weekend went sim lim square...before going out of my house, i actually asked my mom wad she wanna buy.She replied with 50 cdrs...Knowing that she's doin the so call "GOOD STUFFS" again..i just say her back..."for your those so call shi xiong again?duno why u everytime help them buy and not they burn themself...100 pieces all that..."And then guess wad..?I am being accused of "zhao nie" if u all know wad it means...according to her so call BUDDHISM.But wad happen in the end?I still buy for her.It is SO CLEAR that her shi xiong all that is just using her to burn all stuffs...even my sister and brother are lazy to help her.and halo...my mom is not that power in computer?all her questions will come to me and end up i help?
but also..end up i get all this SHIT...nvm abt that...passed her the CDS and the next mornin..she wan quarrel again with me.This time i just in kitchen eating my medi...wad she tell me?Those cds are those chanting for 7th month etc..u like that say will add to the sins..then all those gd karmas will all gone.HALO...that's only ur thinkin and i think we do have our thinkin too?she's only makin mi more n more disappointed in her so call BUDDHISM.still...nvm abt tat...when i come home?wad did i get u knoe...another round...now sayin i always late home..when i was at home after work on mon..tue i aso reach home b4 11pm which is earlier than usual...just a dinner and movie at westmall.den the blaming starts say i dun care my father.WTH is tat?
I asked my sister hows my father...wad ans did i get..?like this lor
I asked my mother hows my father...wad ans did i get?aiya..dun ask already la.very fan la
I did tok to my dad and ask abt hows he's feeling.I did tried to stay at home to accompany him but he's at the horse racing there...so end up i m just an idiot helpin them look after their dog while they go out happili.And know wad?not i dun wan care...am i given a chance to?i wunt even know when my dad is staying in hospital for chemo and such..noone bother to inform mi.
everyone just blame stuffs on me..BUDDHISM?dam selfish teachings?onli living in their own life...tinkin that they are the only 1 with the correct views and everyone shld accept them.haha...For wad i wan treat them gd when everytime i m just a vent anger pot to them!?Noone listen to me tok at all..noone...no matter if it's advices from real life cases or wad..there r more to say..but i'm juz tired of typin it..
Work is getting more n more busier and stressful..
Everything is just getting more n more stressful...Even my colleagues say i look like ghost=.="
I just duno when all these will make mi collapse...
am realli dam tired..
New Lancer 2.0L
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