i'll sing this summer seranade,

and for a moment, for a moment, i am happy

Sunday, August 30

For all the girl talks, to reminiscing our childhood days, to the beautiful sunset we witnessed but dint manage to capture it on film. It’s amazing how much we’ve grown so much after all these years and we’d still be so close. ♥ From Barbie dolls, imaginary tea parties, playing doctor/lawyer/car dealer/and all the imaginary play characters we used to play as. From fighting over toys and password-protected notebooks, from the failed planning of a Christmas party as kids, from the silly girl-member clubs. To boys, to getting our hearts broken over and over again, to the bitchfights, to the crazy situations happening in our families, to weird situations, to shopping, to everything we share now, i’m happy i’ve got people like you to count on. and i love you so. ♥ ♥

Thanks for the awesome weekend, xoxo.

P.S : kim, i love you and we’ll always be there supporting whatever decisions you make. We’d be your soldiers love.

i missed your ginger hair and the way you liked to dress

Friday, August 28

I’m completely burnt ttm now, 3 consecutive days of swimming made me so tired. Met justin bobby just now at the pool and headed for lunch together. Awesome, been having a couple of sleepovers lately, loveee it cant wait to have more of these after O’s. Prelims are the killer i dont know if im even gonna pass my exams now with the current situation, k whatever. losermuch. Going to haji tomorrow for the flea event and lunch and watching the opening of blogshop’s, hopefully i’ll get my cam from the khloee site, been seriously waiting forever. And afterwhich May’s gonna meet her panda, so jealous i need one of him for my birthday. Then we’re gonna stay over at daphne’s house and try to catch the sunrise at some random place along Andrew’s road, my mom dint allowed me at first cuz she dint like py, haha, really silly. miss the buffalo wings at buckaroo’s i hope we order takeouts from there tomorrow night and not sucky Mcdonalds again. >:(

P.S. MayK I know it’s hard living there just press on, gotta live with it, it’ll be over soon, hope your mom stays strong and not die from the dowager. And you’ve still got awesome people in the fam like me and daph love, i’ll shower you with all the love i have heehee ;) wait i did that already in the pool yesterday, so ghey. D:

P.P.S. ALEXIS I MISS YOU, OKAY FOREAL! Come back, i’ve got no one to spend long hours on the shisha and talking like idiots :( cuz only someone as crazy as you would do that. xoxo.

dying

Monday, August 24

this morning when i woke up i had a reaallyy husky voice.

and then this evening when i woke up from my nap i could barely talk.

okay maybe i can but its super soft.

it just occurred to me that my O level english orals are like, tomorrow.

shit.

you tell me your blue sky's painted grey

Why did the weekends end so fast, i was spending the best time i’ve ever had in a very long while with the bestest friends i could ever wish for. I wished everyday was just like that, spending time with the people you love, watching random movies and youtube videos, playing/camwhoring with lomocams, making stuff like a super heavy earrings, go silly, talk a bunch of nonsense, laugh and laugh all over again, singing the stupid duck song and attempting to bedazzle my polariodcam when i know i suck at it. Well now that i’m back to reality, this sucks, i dread facing all the stuff that comes along and can only hope time passes faster so Saturday or Sunday comes again. So i screwed up my papers today. After all the studying and despite everyone telling me to just concentrate on my work and ignore everything else, the situation i was in just now got the better of me and i screwed up. I couldn’t even let myself complete the entire paper, i was struggling the entire time while i was doing the first question. So went to the usual getaway-hiding spot after my exams, made me feel a lil bit better, however i ate a pint of icecream by myself so i’m feeling more guilty now, i got chased out for eating there so i went home. Back to hit the books, for now that is.

it started with a kiss, how did it end up like this?

Saturday, August 22

My daddy used to tell me that the first time you fall in love, it changes your life forever, and no matter how hard you try, the feeling never goes away.
-The Notebook.

So, Sally can wait She knows it's too late as we're walking on by.

Wednesday, August 19

Today, I saw the girl i had started dating changed her Facebook relationship status to “In a relationship”. Naturally, i changed mine too. The next time I logged on, she had commented, “Really?! Who?!” She was serious. –FML

My chinese results were out today, i’ve gotten myself a fabulous nine. V got B3 soo happy for her. ♥ so got home straight after school and i tried studying but after 2 hours of work i fell asleep and when i woke up i got myself soo indulged in sprees. ogayy well maybe i’ll finish up my english homework later in the night. going to smu on Saturday to collect my buys from leia’s site. ohh there’s a flea market going on there too hopefully i’ll find some more cute cool lomo cams. Text me if youre free to pop down with me cuz i dont mind someone else to walk around with me! ;)

this make-believe will get me through another lonely night

Tuesday, August 18

watched forgetting sarah marshall this morning cuz i woke up really late and still felt hung.

soo nice it made me feel like cuddling up and watching it again. Amg & Rachel is so hot.

okay off to school for my chemistry and physics asp now! (:

“When life gives you lemons, just say 'Fuck the lemons,' and bail. ”

a girl will never forget the first boy she likes

Monday, August 17

Girls are taught a lot of stuff growing up.
If a guy punches you he likes you.
Never try to trim your own bangs and someday you will meet a wonderful guy and get your very own happy ending.
Every movie we see, every story we're told implores us to wait for it, the third act twist, the unexpected declaration of love, the exception to the rule.
But sometimes we're so focused on finding our happy ending we don't learn how to read the signs.
How to tell from the ones who want us and the ones who don’t. The ones who will stay and the ones who will leave.
And maybe a happy ending doesn't include a guy, maybe... it's you, on your own, picking up the pieces and starting over, freeing yourself up for something better in the future.
Maybe the happy ending is... just... moving on.
Or maybe the happy ending is this, knowing after all the unreturned phone calls, broken-hearts, through the blunders and misread signals, through all the pain and embarrassment you never gave up hope.
-he's just not that into you-

Got this from tessa’s. argh i wanna watch the whole movie again. Made me tear :’(

the tragedy starts from the very first spark

Sunday, August 16

HELP.

Dominic made V into all the camera spree stuff it influenced me today too. okay first things first, I need to bedazzle my Fujifilm cuz mine looks seriously boring and i’m so sick of how it looks. but i have no idea / or any experience of bedazzling things soooo i need help. Period. Okay then i need to decide between these 3 cams which are totally cute. I wished i had all of them but my mom would prolly kill me for buying so many at once. I’m thinking of getting the waterproof one first cuz i can bring it when i swim now but the jellycam and the sparkly-pink cam that V has is sooo pretty. Gaah oggayy helpp D:

Okay today was kinda awesome. Though i woke up late for youth, i popped by his place to return him all the stuff he left at my place (but dint had time to come over to collect it since we stopped talking ages ago). Though it was kinda stupid cuz he wasn’t even appreciative at all, i was kinda happy all this shit is so over. Okay happy post. So i rushed over for lunch with kim and V at paradise inn and we had a long talk together while waiting for lunch which took forever to come. Tess came over and we went to kim’s place to attempt to study and cleaned a lil of her room together. Well see we spilled 2 drinks and made a hugee mess out of her room so we spent like almost an hour of mopping, wiping, washing and changing of sheets. The rooms smells a tad bit like vodka now. Cleaning was fun though, good practice for our future girlhouse together. :D

Okay right now i’m stuck at macdonald’s sipping latte cuz it’s raining heavily and i’m trying to save on cab fare so i’m wasting time here waiting for the rain to stop so i can walk back home or wait for dad to return my calls and pick me up. Not really in the mood for school tomorrow, V has no school for 2 dayss! >:(

Tomorrow is always a new battle.

Saturday, August 15

So i went for my “last appointment” with the dentist today for my filling, scaling and polishing. The whole experience was so excruciating, cant even think about how having braces would suck more than this appointment i had today. I hate the dentist’s though he was really nice to me just now, i freaked out like maad and embarassed myself the whole entire time this afternoon. :( OH YES AND, my next appointment had to be next month so i dragged it till like, after my birthday. So i wouldn’t feel so irritated and traumatized like i was today. damn am i soo fucked. Not looking forward to the next appointment >:(

Well I was quite bothered with the metallic taste on my mouth so i dint go to haji in the end. Instead i stayed home for 3hours of what seemed like studying to me, alot of movie marathons, and random googling of pretty tatts. I feel soo wasted. Well i hope i get to study properly with the girls tomorrow though. Prelims are on Friday and i doubt i’m even gonna make it cuz i’ve been procrastinating to do well for like my entire life.

PS. whatever happened to that moment we had? dont tell me it meant nothing, cuz it was the best day of my life. A painful blow to the heart no doubt.

xoxo, me

Friday, August 14

how does it feel to take everything away from someone? it should have been awesome i guess.

cuz you seem to look really happy.

(btw you, it's impossible to study with so much in your head, thanks for helping though)

keep your hand in my hand, your heart on your sleeve

Wednesday, August 12

Love is not a maybe thing; you know when you love someone. – LC

Kill me cuz i have a massive amount of F&N coursework undone and the deadline’s like, uhg, tomorrow. I hate it cuz we aren’t allowed to bring it home to complete it. D: My preliminary exams are up next week too, and i’m soo fucked cuz’ i’m nowhere near prepared. This is driving me a lil crazy, trying to study. I did 3 hardcore hours of math just now and i nearly died out of it. I’ve got so much to do. :/ crazy school day tmr! >:(

i swore i'll never fall again, but this dont even feel like falling

Tuesday, August 11

All the situations that i’ve gone through the past weeks had made me so much stronger, and it wouldn’t have happened if not for people like kim, jc, seri, alexis and the others who really genuinely cared with all the text messages and stuff like that. While i’ve been learning life’s most valuable lessons i’m really glad there were people like them who were there to listen to me. Yes even if i was whining non-stop. :)

Kim though you’re a huge bimbo you’re a really nice friend and not too-mean (just violent though), thank you dearie for talking to me when i was shaking so much on sun. It’s so good to have people like you, tess and v as friends and to be able to like just go crazy every Sunday (even if i dont come sometimes heehee).

Jc, my agony aunt, omgosh has been the bestest dude-best-friend i’ve ever had, from buying me waffles when i dint want to eat during recess, for enduring all the whining, for being my swimming-bud, for letting me complain so much and all the mini-talks we had outside and in school. Well no thanks for making me have subway and an upsized macs meal right after swimming laps though. >:(

Seri thanks the littlest things you do to make me happy when i was down; i’m so glad that i could relate so much to you. Though it’s been aeons since we last hung out, i’m just really really glad we talked and you could see part of me in you when we talked about the stuff that happened. Thanks for being someone whom i can trust, and someone who lifts me up from where i was from and for the encouragements that made me feel soo much stronger. Also, for helping me to find closure.

Alexis and shisha was always fun cuz we would have crazy girl-talks and we would do crazy shit like running around kissing people. It kinda makes me sad now to realise that you’re moving and we’re gonna have less together time (as if the time we’re free together aren’t less enough already). Come back to sg soon or i’ll come over. >:( really glad to have known you last year even though we hardly knew each other before, if not for that night at Delmar we couldn’t have been this close. <3>you darling.

Okay nuff’ said, I guess picking yourself up from all the mess and facing all the shit once and for all is so much better than running away & waiting for that moment for someone to take the initiative to make things better. Well, for me to take the initiative this time was a huge step, i hardly took initiative to resolve things, thats why i never solved most of my problems in the past. But this time, it really really helped me alot and made me feel so good to voice out how i feel. To those whom i’ve possibly hurt, i’m really sorry for the stupid things i’ve did. I never want to be in such a situation again and besides, i have O levels to worry for. (80days-or less, ammagash) okay happy post sooo i’m not gonna talk about the agony of school and O levels.

Oh and my birthday’s coming! (i know everyone’s been hearing this and getting sick of it) i want a mac so badly D: oh the best of all mark’s coming back this year to celebrate since he missed my sweet 16 last year (well thats if he reaches before the 4^th though). The sunflowers from last year was awesome already so it dint matter if he’s here this year, lol. I’ll just settle for the gift heehee :D

i've heard myself cry, never again!

Sunday, August 9

'' In the first of the second season heidi is just starting to date a guy named spencer, lauren and spencer dont get along at the start, so when heidi keeps picking spencer over lauren it makes their friendship rocky. In season 3, heidi moves out of her and laurens apartment to move in with spencer. so then lauren comes to find out that terrible rumors were spread about her, and Spencer spread this rumor. Heidi always wanted to be friends with Lauren. But Lauren knew what Spencer did. So in that episode when Heidi came over to Lauren's place to try and be friends with Lauren again, Lauren basically said I really do I want to forgive you, and I want to forget you. ''

today i found out that i'm half a bimbo.

I MADE A WALLET OUT OF A JUICE CARTON BY MYSELF WITHOUT USING THE TEMPLATE YAYYY I'M SO NOT DUMB, KIM IS A GANGSTA-BIMBO! :)

and we're leavin' never looking back again

Friday, August 7

school sucked ttm today! :( first i was in school early but i got detained for my tie and i had to go through the shit with my discipline master. then, there was no dumb performance, no massive parade(which i kinda miss from school), no skit, no shit at all. all we had was a dumb speech, dumb prize giving ceremony, teachers going up to the stage speaking impromptu trying to use up some time so the program runs on, and then my stupid principal talking about globalization and the impacts of singapore's foreign policies. he talked about those 2 topics for almost an hour. OH-MY-GOSH i totally wasted my time there, it was more of a massive social studies class in the hall rather than national day celebrations. i bet my friends from the other schools sure did had wayyy much more fun than me. the school seriously really changed for the worst since sec2, the whole dumb planning of the celebrations made me so cranky today. jeez.

carry the weight of the world on my shoulders

Thursday, August 6

i hate to be compared. period.

and you dont shut me off or diss me when i'm talking nicely.

my mom's making me crazy. fuck that.

the quiet scares me cause' it screams the truth

Lazing on my bed now, i’m soo tired but i cant sleep either cuz my head hurts really badly everytime i cough or sneeze. :( Anyway i just got back from school, skipped half a day of it. Thank goodness i dint stay till the end cuz lessons on Thursdays are always really really boring, dry and energy-zapping. D: gotta wait for my kakak to bring me to the doctor’s later. I hope i get to go school tomorrow. No idea why, though it’s gonna be another half-day of school i feel like going to look at random people marching and slapping on artificial tattoos on my face just to embrace myself with the festivities, it’s gonna be my last year in school anyway. I’ll try to have as much as i could possibly get. I miss swimming, and the stupid waterpolo game. :/ ( not that crazy dbag though :( ) hopefully all goes well and i get to go in the weekends or on Monday. ( and hopefully i wont see that idiot >:( ). Happy post, happy post. I want to watch fireworks, i missed out the one on new year’s sooooooo, bring me ;) i’m dying in my room, guitar hero’s my new best friend, though it’s kinda getting old and boring. Maybe i should do some math and physics later :/

Tuesday, August 4

we brought the worst out of each other i dont even know how is it even possible to go back now. it’s so ugly, how our situation was handled. i wished there was a proper conversation that day though, hate the shit you talk about. (raandomm haha.) school was soo tiring and weird today, jeez. and i think i misplaced my ipod again :( i want to go paintball and bungee soo much someone promise to take me please? :) tutor got fired yesterday, kinda happy cuz i seriously do not like him at all. He was kinda handsome, though he’s damn bad to me. Whatever, glad he’s gone. xoxo.

Monday, August 3

vintage vanessafayewong!

vintage kim and tessa. hahahahaha

i found that in my super old thumbdrive. Fop 2007. Two years ago. How ugly.

(dont kill me for this but it’s soo funny! haha)

STOP LOOKING AT MY SITE YOU MORON. :)

Sunday, August 2

I need an ipod, new camera, a cat & more money to buy like 8packs of films (i’m finishing the ones i have left at home). >:( i’m almost broke from spending waayyy too much last month :/ thank god it’s August already. My birthday’s in a month! sooo yayyy. (though it’s gonna be really like shit this year) i dont care anymore. whatever, i cant wait to ditch Secondary school. craaazzyyy shit. slacking at starbucks now, leaving in 20minutes to find Gabriella for some random bbq with his friend-thing, dont even know why i decided to tag along. oh, cuz someone decided to ditch me alone at vivo for extra sleeping-time. Bitch, D: Oh my gosh, green tea latte is damn nice Vanessa got me hooked on it. omgeee i’m so bored D: xoxoxoxo.

BTW, I HATE MY HAIR SO IF IT SUCKS DONT TELL ME. I KNOW, & I DONT NEED TO BE REMINDED CUZ IT BRINGS MORE TRAUMA TO MYSELF. XOXO.

(and i just realised it's offficially sunday, so school's kinda like tmr, yikes.)

Went over to my nana’s today cuz my mom said we haven’t been there for really long. :/ When we got there there wasn’t anyone home at all. Lucas and i got so bored there we decided to cycle around and get ice popsicles. I found out today that he could finally learn how to ride a bicycle without training wheels. Wtf. I think i was still in training wheels when i was his age. So that stupid May Kwok Siew Peng was still all out having fun over at her friend’s. I was hoping she chanced upon my twitter there and rush home to entertain me cuz it’s seriously, seriously boring there. (But when she got home her boyf came by and stayed over so they were like upstairs, sooo i was left downstairs listening to my crappy brother’s talkings D: ) When i got back to the house to grab a drink my grandma started talking to me. As usual it was really hard understanding her cuz it’s all Cantonese and i know no shit about that weird language-thing. Usually i’d just nod my head and pretend i understand what she’s saying but there was this thing she asked me about school just now and then she found out i dint understand her at all cuz i was giving all the wrong signs and looking lost. So their new maid came over to correct me and be my translator. Okay wtf much since when and where in the world did they got such a maid like that. I was humiliated, like enough that my family are mocking me because of my mother tongue now even the maid is more clever than me. Ah shit. Having a durian party over at my place now it’s kinda gross cuz my lil brother keeps farting, jeez. I watched Bruno this morning it was soooo nice. Haha. Borat’s kinda cute.

I'm hating the fact that tomorrow’s Sunday, cuz that means i’ll be having school the next day (which obviously sucks). The weekends are always so faast :(