Money, money, money, it's a rich man's world!

Ok yes, I've found a job on the very day after my last post. And that accounts for my lack of posts until now because I'm so tired and busy after work everyday that I don't have the energy to post. Well sort of. The biggest reason is because I'm too lazy to post, as usual.

I don't know how to break the news to you guys but actually, I'm now working as a...Banker. Direct marketeer. Telemarketeer. Promoter for credit cards and business/personal loans. In fact the stuff I handle daily are personal information and to reveal them here may just get me arrested. So what's the use of finding a job that I can't blog about!!! BECAUSE THERE ARE SO MANY INTERESTING THINGS TO BLOG ABOUT AND IT'S ILLEGAL TO TALK ABOUT THEM DARN IT.

So everyday I look through people's income tax, CPF contributions, company bank statements and would you believe it but I have sold close to a million dollars worth of loans now. This job has got me to so many places and people that I even had to visit a Sex Shop to see my client. Ok that sounds so wrong.

Please just imagine my horror when the place I had to step into had a gigantic condom on it's front doors and the whole place was awashed with sleazy red lights and...Exotic toys, for want of a better description. And it was only for above 21s, and I went "Omg, I can't go in because I'm only 18!!!" Unfortunately, or fortunately for you kinky ones, I still had to step in with my manager (who was an Indian man in his 50s). So an 18 year-old girl and a man in his 50s stepped into a Sex Shop at night. Rather a sordid little scene. But of course with typical Heidi flair I swish into the shop and went expressionless even though I saw things that I've never in my life seen, or imagined.

The man's wife(or at least I assume she is his wife) kept eyeing me, perhaps suspicious of my age and maybe out of curiousity at my reactions (which I might add is close to none, as if I have just stepped into a Toy shop instead, except toys of the innocent variety instead of the sex-ual ones which the whole shop was filled with). At one point the proprietor of the shop leaned close to me and ask if a shop like his would earn much. Judging by the number of men walking into his shop which, true to stereotype, looked rather tiko pek-ish (or maybe it was the influence of the sleazy red lights that made them look like lusty satyrs), I would suppose it was a fair indicator of his shop's success. I forgot what I answered him though, I suspect he did it only to unnerve me, unsuccessfully.

So yes people, I do meet with interesting characters, directors who asked me to call them daddy, men who earn 15k a month. A boss with 8 large arrowanas(and you know how much one costs). Bossy secretaries(we call them guard dogs), nice aunties, bitchy wives, affable foreigners, scheming competitors, impromptu crash courses given by top-level managers of the Bank and best of all Economics plays a large part in my job. Turns out education at A levels does have its uses after all. (Oh and looking at large paychecks gives me a kick..."Wee this guys earns 140k a year!"..."Wow 10 million!!!")

I do get a first-hand look at how ruthless and unethical the world of business can be. Especially bank business. And perceptiveness is a great asset in this game of money. If you're looking for a job you can always contact me, I've had a few offers, from the Bank itself and from directors of SMEs. So come on guys and join in the bandwagon!

My foot lah. It's not all a bed of roses as they make it out to be.

"Anybody wants free credit cards?!"

Cuz we are livin' in a material world...

And I am a material girl.

Folkies, I'm going on a job hunt tomorrow. A job hunt that will hopefully end with me getting a job that pays 5000 pounds a day and all I have to do is sit on a chair, uncrossing and crossing my legs and looking pretty.

My minimum wage will be S$1300 a month though. For that price you'll get an 18-year old ex-student who has an ass that is quite smart. For that price you get all the youthful idealism the world has to offer bottled up into one hard cold heart.
For that price you get me!

Today I went to a bookshop, picked out two books and proceeded with my usual spiel to the lady boss, with why she should give me discounts because I'm doing her a favour by buying two old torn books that no one would probably want. I got $2 off.

Maybe one day people will pay me just to buy things from them.

Brave New World and Girls.

Well yes my A levels are over (though not officially since I haven't collected results yet). Wee yay and all that. So how does the newly released girl feel? A little sad and empty. I AM NO LONGER A GOOFY KID ANYMORE I HAVE LOST MY STUDENTHOOD AND NO MORE UNIFORMS TO WEAR. I feel kind of purposeless now.

So after my last Lit paper (which I think I screwed so help me God if I don't get my A I shall just dieeee) I felt this wave of nostalgia for the school and schoolhood. Even though I was still in school. On the way out I kept yelling "BYE BYE NANYANG!!" and took quite stupid pictures of the school. Even typing about it now makes me feel...sad. And to think that a year and 8 months ago I quite disliked it here...there. I'm not used to it yet though, I still think I have to go to school. ARGH.

It's this period between student and responsible adult that's so awkward, like going through puberty all over again. =( Except my pimples are less than when I was going through puberty and my boobs will probably not grow anymore (unless I drink papaya milk).

The thought of months stretching before me being a jobless kid is quite scary, a little worse than exams even. So I decided that I shall find a job to buy all the games I want (PSP, PS2) and the clothes and the food and the vcds and the everything! Woohoo. I think I want to be a librarian. Or maybe something to do at the zoo? (like muck manure?)

How to go about finding a job that pays reasonably well, does not have very long hours, and nice working environment?? Oh and provides uniforms/working attire. Nurse hah? Playboy bunny? Bartender? The possibilities are endless!

Went out with the Cheese, The Men-ce, The Bing Xue Chong Ming de Xue and some Ling thing, and The Guanyin Ma to celebrate End of Exams and Beginning of Birthdays. Almost every hour I'll be paying for something.
There was this incident where I was waddling along trying to dig coins out of my purse when a boy/man/monkey/alien?? with eyeliner I think, jumped in front of me SUDDENLY and said "Myfrenwansurnarmber" and just as quickly hopped away while I went "Hah?"
He said "Justotellyou...jizztotellyou". And I went "Hah???" again. And then I ran away. To top up my card lah.

But that same guy approached the brown gang and ask for don't know who's number, and then said "Just say no just say no." Maybe we're being taped on an episode of Gotcha or Just for Gags or Singaporeans Are Weird or something.

That's not the highlight of the trip. The hightlight of the trip was when I went to Plaza Sing with the gang and saw the iGallops there. I very much wanted to uh...ride the things. It looks fun mah...COME ON. No pun intended.
So I tugged The Cheese and the Goddess of Mercy's sleezes, pointed to the moving things and said "Wanna try!!!" They of course said no. "People will see lor!"
Cheese also gave her typical jaw-dropping response of "I'm afraid I will moan while riding it" while I stared at her increduously.
"But we're wearing uniform what, not as bad as if we wear home clothes."
"Precisely because we're wearing uniform people will look! It's obscene!"
"But it's fun!"

Hey I know secretly quite a few of you want to try it too ok, only that we're too embarrassed to even come near 10 metres of the galloping machines.
Just then, we saw Dorisa and Colleen and I suggested to them we should try the iGallop. "Want to try want to try!"
Colleen was game enough for it! And The Cheese made the suggestion that we should "massage our *insert word of female mammary glands* while we ride it". Hummm, I feel like I'm typing a scene out of a romance novel -_-
Imagine a bunch of schoolgirls in uniforms riding the iGallop and well...AIYA it's just so lurid and ah-peks-will-love-it-and-just-get-heart-attacks and the fulfillment of any guy's fantasies. So over the top that it becomes ludicrous instead. I burst out laughing so hard that I wheezed.

But we did try to iGallop in the end. Cheese, Collen and me. Cheese and me daintilly placed our bums on the moving machine and we probably look like tomatoes in brown uniforms bobbing along. Colleen, I must take my hat off her, spread her legs wide and rode it cowgirl style. Why do I feel like I'm still typing a scene out of a romance novel. So yes, I did it, I finally rode...uh tried...the thing!

And came away triumphant! Or more like "Oh my gawd I can't believe I just did that."
Anyways The Men-ce said that it wasn't really much, we only sat there for a few seconds and sat so lady-like, not like Colleen. Whom again I shall take my hair off fore *sweeps wig off head and bows*. Brave girl brave girl.

So folkies, you should try the iGallop, if only to delibrately embarrass yourself in public now and then. And to satisfy (again no pun intended) your curiousity while doing it (one more time, no pun intended). Giddy-up girl! Weehee! (If only I had cowboy boots and hat then).

Shakespeare and Sushi.

The thought that the most significant exams of my entire lifetime would end in 2 days can be a little dizzying. "It's over! It's finally over!"
However the fact that I STILL am not studying for my last few papers sort of negates any warm fuzzy feelings I get.
AIYA HEIDI WHY ARE YOU STILL SUCH A LAZY BUTTHOLE!!!

Just a few days ago I talked about Econs being a killer paper and how glad I will be if everybody just fails. Econs to me is what Literature is to many others I think.
Literature is a subject that no matter how much you study, (or don't study like flabby yours truly here) you can still don't get what the hell Shakespeare is about because if Romeo and Juliet were alive in this century,

a) Romeo would never say such poetic lines like "Forswear it sight for I've never seen true beauty till this night!" instead he'll nudge his drinking buddies with his elbow, wink at Juliet and say "Check that hot babe out man!"

b) Juliet would rebuff Romeo by saying "Girls don't want boys, they want cars and money".

c) In the event that they do get it on together, Romeo would be arrested for under-age *ahem* (nevermind he's under-age himself), Juliet would be a teenage mom living in a squalid trailer.

d) If their parents forbid them to be together, they wouldn't drink poison but reunite in extremely corny music videos, crying in the rain or shaking their booty with background dancers slinking about and a rapper going "yeah yeah uh uh! Yeah uh! Girls yeah! Uh! uh! They don't fall in love, they fall in lust yeah! With bling bling guys like us uh uh!"

Why am I posting such ridiculous scenarios? I don't know why too yeah! Yeah! Uh uh! *bobs head* Perhaps what I'm trying to say is if I don't get A for Lit I'm just going to kill myself. And Shakespeare.


On the topic of eating...
Why is it that all those Japanese shows show how delicious sushi is but reality is so different! After watching one particularly tantalising episode where the hosts relaxes in Onsen(hot springs) and eats the most drool-inducing raw stuff "Oiishi ne!!!" I've ever seen, I craved so much for sushi I immediately went to Sakae Sushi. And well...Lets just say I ended up chewing raw stuff chewing chewing and chewing and wondering in my mind if I was ever going to forgive that Japanese show for this. Reality shows are fakes!! I HATE THEM. Don't trust people who go "mmmmmm" in shows because they are going "bleargh" in the minds instead!!

"I want sushi...I want sushi"<--sing to the tune of Aaron Carter's I want Candy.

Talk about lunch!

Well here I am sitting in front of the computer and trying to psyche myself up for studying for the last 3 papers of the A levels. And too lazy to go to Macdonalds to buy my lunch, so as usual I emotionally blackmail my unwilling brother into buying lunch for me.

"Help me buy lunch," the Elder Sister said.

"No, I don't want to go! You're always asking me to buy lunch!" The brother wailed.

"Just help me buy lah!!"

"Don't want. And you can't make me." Petulant pout.

A glint in my left eye. *twinkle twinkle* A look at the clock says it's 2.10pm.
Time for Plan "Guilt Trip".

"My life was never this horrible until you came into it! For how many years I've been doing housework for you while you just sit around and watch TV and I get scolded for every irritating thing you do like when you take Tacky and I shout at you for it and I get shouted back at by the mother! All you can do for me is just to buy lunch and throw the rubbish! I can't even blame you for anything while you mess up my life with your irritating! stupid!...*gestures wildly*...behaviour!" *walks to the window and look out silently as if trying to cool down* "So now you see why I dislike you so much just go down and buy lunch for me and everything will be alright!" *flings money on the table*

A resigned sigh. "What do you want?"

"Macdonalds chicken nuggets meal chilli sauce do not upsize and get two straws."

"Card." I handed over the Macdonalds membership card.
And off he trudges.

So here I am now, 2.20pm, nibbling delicately on my KFC nugget ("I said Macdonalds!!") and sipping my Coke, while a tub of whipped potato lies next to me.
Ahh...such is the life.

For advice on how to complain, but melodically and beautifully, watch the video below. Don't miss it.

Helsinki Complaints Choir

Inwhich Heidi willingly reads blogs and calculates.

I'm so desperate about Econs that I'm using internet search engines and typing "econs" just to read people's blogs about how they felt about Econs. Reading blogs! I am actually resorting to doing that when I never liked reading blogs!

And when everyone else was discussing about other papers and the answers they gave during econs, I was frantically inputing my estimated marks for econs to see what I will get. I even came up with different combinations! There's the pessimistic one where I barely get a C, there's the optimistic one where I can actually get close enough to a B, and there's the Heidi/forget/it/you're/dreaming combination where I get an A.

I am so desperate that I hope most people do not do well so that the bell curve will work in my favour. (In fact I always hope that most people do not do very well because lazy Heidi never study wants to pull people down into the water with her.)

I smile when I read about "how sucky econs is!!!" in people's blogs and frown and tsk-tsk when I read "econs was fine". See that's how horrible I am.

I think I'll get ABC, that's the half optimistic half-pessimistic view. ABB is the optimistic view. AAA is the delusional view. The grounded-in-reality view is BCC.


ARGH ARGH. You know what's one thing that I find myself really regreting? It's that I never turn up for the A maths paper because I knew there was no hope for it, thereby wasting hundreds of dollars. -__-

I never realised how stressful JC actually is, until the A levels. Buahahahahhahaa.

A Day in The After-One-Horrible-Exam Life of Heidi.

Using blogger beta, I discovered that I've already posted 500 posts and not including drafts I think. Am I typertive or what.

Dear Bloggie,

Can I ask you why am I so lazy? Will I be lazy forever? Will I get at least a C for Econs? Can I get to go to a good university? Why am I born in the "Omg-It's-Examinations!!" land of Singapore?

CAAAAAANNNNN IIIIIII JJUUUUUUSSSTTTTT DIEEEEEEE because I seriously screwed up Econs today. AHHHH AHHH AHH!!!

Faith Hill a rhymes-with-witch?

I've read comments from countless of people who are "outraged...feels deceived...disappointed...disgusted..." blah blah blah. From the intensity of their reactions, you would think these are the people who have been paying Faith Hill's fees and bills ever since she was born and are her teachers/parents/bosses.

Oh come on! Why do some people these days get so worked up over things that are really trivial, or none of their business? Take Madonna's decision to adopt a baby for example. Why is it even an issue to begin with?

"Oh my gawd, Maddy adopted an African baby she's so going to ruin his life lets be enraged and tell the media so because that's absolutely unethical and fame-seeking of her."

Lets think with common sense, is baby David going to have a better quality of life both materially and non-materially? Education, life expectancy, health care, freedom of speec/rights. Oh hell yeah.
And oh having to take care of a child for the rest of your natural life versus the fleeting (dubious)fame brought on by adopting?
Adopting is an act of acceptance of someone else's child, I don't think someone would adopt with the express purpose of making that child's life a living hell? These people demean the whole act of adoption by their petty and mean insinuations.

"What! Faith Hill was angered by Carrie's win! What a biatch! How can she do this, Carrie deserves to win and Faith Hill shouldn't be angry at all! Lets tell the media how angry we are at Faith Hill!"

Ridiculous right. If Faith was a Singaporean she'll go "Wat's ur problem lah! My business not yours! People joking you also want to kpkb(vulgar words for being intefering), knn kaypohs(again vulgar words for being interfering idiots)! Don't tell me you also want to tell me how to breast-feed huh huh huh!"
I think Jesus once said something like "let he who hath done no sins cast the first stone"? Even if you're not a Christian, this saying makes an awful lot of sense. ARE WE JESUSES? NO WE AREN'T.

So at the end of the day, lets just be angry at more important things. Like why KFC's chicken don't come serve steaming hot and crispy. And why turtles don't get the recognition they deserve for being the cutest animals on the planet. In fact, I think the media should be alerted about this and the whole should be outraged.

Well, here it is folks...the much anticipated Britney/K-fed split. Most of Britney's fans(including people who aren't her fans) are probably throwing their hands up in celebration for this girl now.

"Good riddance!"
"Well, it was only a matter of time..."
"You go girl!"



I am happy that she is ditching the husband who seems to be making use of her more than being a supportive father. However I couldn't help wishing they'd stay together, that maybe, despite what everyone says about K-Fed making use of her, maybe there was a magic there and she was truly happy with him.

Here's good luck to her and wishing her all the best.

Right now I'm eating KFC from Hougang Point and I would really really love to complain to their management soon. ALWAYS never once have I gotten fries or zinger burger that's still crisp. Today's one is really horrible, the fries have turned soggy and the burger looks and tastes like it has been laying around for hours.
They are barely warm!

I pay so much to eat food like this, it's a bloody big disappointment man.

13 Days.

In another 13 days, my A levels would be over. 18 years of studying (add 9 months for the time I was in the incubator) and it all boils down to 13 days. Lucky 13! I live on the 13th floor too!

So what the hell am I still doing here? Only just to say that despite all my promises and swearings at myself to work hard after going through all the trials and tribulations of having a lazy ass, I'm still doing the same thing for my A levels. The most important exams of the my entire life and all I can think of is what PC games to buy, whether PS2 will be cheaper and how much it would cost to buy some PSP games.

Lets face it Heidi, you're hopeless.

Yesterday I dreamt that I was blind. Didn't they say that dreams are a manifestation of our daily lives?
I think it's so true. By being blind, I need not study for my exams!!!

AIYA if it really works I'll be dreaming about the questions to the exams already. Oh wait, didn't I dream of the GP question before?

Free Hugs

Free Hugs for everyone! And cop a feel of butts while you're at it. Hey it's free!

Women are the noblest creatures on Earth. If you disagree you're a man, even if you're a woman.

I never thought I'd be one to go ga-ga over some famous person. Aside from the times I get excited when seeing a celebrity, and trying to get an autograph to sell off at an exorbitant price.

However when I saw her on TV, and the fact that she's in Singapore, made me go ballistic and enunciate the following words with a fervour that I reserve for Godiva chocolates. "I...Must...See...Her...Some..How...At...ALL...Cost."
She's slim, elegant and an utter inspiration. She walks tall with the determination and the powerful intellect only an ape-lover could have. She is the venerable..Jane Goodall.

AHHHH AHHH !!!!!! Excitement thrums within me again.

But a day later I'm still sitting here on my fat ass, wondering whether comfortable sexy bras are an oxymoron, while typing this entry out. Why am I thinking of bras in the first place?? Because I just watched "What Not To Wear" on Channelnewsasia and apparently a good bra can do wonders for your figure and confidence and damn it I need a bra that doesn't bite.

Especially during my bloody (ohh pun pun!) ovulation cycles that will
a)turn me into person suffering from bi-polarism, smiling at Tacky one second and snapping my brother's head off the next.
b)stomach cramps. Need I say more?
c)make my mammary glands so bloody sensitive I'm brought back to the time of Puberty when everyday was lived in fear of accidently bumping my chest against something.
d)make me get mad at boys for being so utterly smug and free from all female inconveniences and going through Army is NOTHING compared to childbirth, period pains for the rest of your fertile life, breasts/bum insecurities, wrinkles, weight gain and the utter frustrations at the total dumbbutt-behaviour of the male gender at times.

If you can't tell by now I'm having PMS...Well I'm having PMS DAMN IT. GP WAS HORRIBLE. EXAMS ARE HORRIBLE. STUDYING FOR A LEVELS JUST TOTALLY...Ok I believe I'm a bit better now. Oh Look Tacky is sleeping!! SO CUTE. Omg I lub you my turtle-girl!

Why You Should Never Be Reincarnated In Singapore.

I went cold with shock/fear/horror. How in the world am I suppose to choose between the questions "Write engagingly about the experiences you'll have overseas" and another question that was a total blur to me because I knew that I couldn't do it, so my mind decided to blur it away.

Which left "Write engagingly about the experiences you'll have overseas". How in the bloody hell am I supposed to write engagingly, I am not prepared for this question! Should I do this question? I AM NOT A RICH KID I HAVE NEVER REALLY BEEN OVERSEAS!!! Should I do this question????

Before I knew it the time was up and I had to hand in my paper. My blood and ears rang like sirens and alarm bells. I panicked in the middle of the hall "I never do the last question! I. NEVER. DO. THE. LAST. QUESTION!" As my friends crowded around me, I wailed out "I am going not going to get A1 for GP!"

They dragged my wailing body away from the hall and I met Mrs Gan and Ms Victor on the way out of a long passageway. Mrs Gan had a disapproving look on her face. She knew! "I didn't do the last question on the Lit paper Mrs Gan!" And her face turned forbidding.

Questions ran through me, can I still get A for Lit? One question doesn't really hurt much right? Will I be unable to qualify for Law in the university with a B for lit? Am I going to get my A??

I extended my hand to search for the pillow that had gone astray. Ah there...it has fallen to the floor. Pulled it into my safe embrace and went back to sleep again.
This time I am a devotee at a temple in Vietnam, trying to search for peace for my soul during my exams.

After that I was in a horror/thriller/detective situation. Watching through the eyes of a detective who was closing in on the man who murdered his brother. But I knew all the while this detective is a ghost, so he never really is in any danger. And he had a wife and children who were all ghosts too.

I call this phenomenon, the "Mental trauma forced upon Singaporean kids by the Government that wants to produce Elites (Read: a certain minister who wanted graduates to marry graduates)". Called Nightmares for short.

I don't usually have nightmares of exams. I remember the last time it happened was during my O levels and the last last time it happened was during my PSLE. Now I'm sitting through my A levels. I think you get the drift.

I guess this is what you get if the total amount of studying you did for the past few weeks of study break is equal to the amount of information taught in one week during European history lessons. 1 week down, 95 more weeks to go.
And hey, GP paper is tomorrow! HOLA!

When Life Gets In The Way...

Days ago I wanted to post something as cliche as "Life is so unpredictable and can turn completely upside-down in a matter of hours." HAH!
Little did I know that's a major understatement because someone, somewhere who perhaps answers to the name of God, decides to toy with my life further resulting in a Heidi whose life just can't be anything but abnormal.

Events I would love to tell you all about just that I don't have time, need to go pluck some arm hair/kiss Tack/do unproductive things.

Actually it's all the fault of Blogger, which keeps giving me page errors even though I repeatedly pleaded out loud "DON'T DO THIS TO ME!" *echo echo*.
So it spoilt the flow of words in my brain, which then stopped sending signals to my fingers to type.

Instead my fingers decided to click on a link and another and another until I finally came upon this video which you should not miss, especially if you feel like you have a death wish sometimes. And also if you like animals. And also if you're bored. And also if you have exams in 2 days time and have not studied shit and just feel like wasting your life further.

Here's to wasting your life away!

Oh pimp me pimp me.

Here I was sipping porridge and glancing at my myspace account (yes I have myspace) then I saw some guy who added me. With a "Daddy" in his name, I thought he must be one of those guys who are overly friendly.

I click on his face and the music there suddenly blasts out, you know those hentai japanese shows with the music that reminds you of sleazy night clubs? Yeah those kind of music. I was a little shocked by the music at first, because it was so weird, then I scrolled down his page and almost choked on my porridge when I saw the pictures of his friends.

His friends have a few common characteristics. They are girls. They are young. Their pictures border on being blatantly exhibitionistic or already went over that line. They have bambi eyes and kawaii poses. They have long hair and fringes that cover part of their faces. They are from exotic places like Korea, Japan, Sydney, London...They are asian girls.

Oh my gawd lah. I feel like I'm clicking on the page of a professional pimp or something. The pictures were all a bit semi-r(a) types, those jap school girls, nymphets with bedroom eyes and breathy voices that would go "give me a huggg daddyyy". And his profile says "Hurt Me" and "come to daddy gers".

I frantically tried to think of which picture I put on my profile. Ok what, my picture is decent, I am not revealing like a boob or something why the bloody hell he go add one 18 year-old student who doesn't even know who he is.
Then it hit me. It must be because I had some pictures where I am wearing my ny uniform, including one with the tie.

Cheh. Those tiko types like, likes schoolgirls. Authentic school girls who wear ties. Ok I'm looking at his profile again. That music really cracks me up lah. What kind of pimping song is that. Tokyo Drift by Teriyaki Boyz. Hurhur...AHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA. *snort*

Recently I read this post where a man complains about motorcycle drivers who drive at civilian pavements. You know those places, especially underneath HDB blocks where people walk? Yah yah, so I was thinking, "Eh I don't really experience this kinda thing leh."

I think someone heard my thoughts. Fate is one funny thing. I was walking home just now carrying extremely heavy stuff like my 1 litre polka green tea, 2 years of econs notes and fried cake. So there I was perspiring and dying under the weight of such heavy stuff when I came close to dying. I was crossing this corner (you see the nearest HDB block right, they have this corners where you can only see straight ahead) just at the same time a motorcycle was driving across this corner.

I was totally horrified when a second ago I couldn't even see anyone in front of me then suddenly I come face to face with a motorcyle and its driver and it's glaring lights. And it's night time some more. Like WHAT THE KNN KPKB it's bloody illegal to drive here(like driving through a shopping mall like that) and the driver obviously knew he almost killed me, because if he had just stopped seconds later he would have knocked into me. Correction : His freakin motorbike driving at 40km/h would have freakin' knocked me down.

He looked as equally shocked as i did I guess. His eyes widened and he almost fell off his bike and the best thing is, he bloody drove away without saying "Sorry I almost killed you."
I bet he was afraid I was going to take down his vehicle number and complained lor.
I could have sued him for, for uh mental trauma!

I tell you if he did indeed knocked into me, it's one thing to just kill me and be done with it, but if he had injured me so much that I can't write or think when the A levels are just 2 weeks away, I would have hunted him down with my injured hand. I would run after him with a parang, I would lock his HDB door/gate hang a pig's head there and then burn his flat (without anyone inside lah) I would have went to his company and send dead aniamls/severed fingers into a letter. I will...CASTRATE HIM.

Ok here's what I remember, it was a delivery motorcycle, I think it's pizza hut. the time is around 8.10pm at Hougang St 91 there. the block i forgot but I'll go check it up.
I'll make sure I complain to don't know where lah. At least let me have some compensation money leh. Or bribe me not to sue that guy for causing grievous mental harm and causing me to break out in swear words and uh...for wasting 10 min of my precious life typing this out.

Blah. I KNOW if I see the guy again at those criminal line-ups I will recognize him man.
He was quite cute lah.

Oh my gawd Heidi you're such a bimbo. Where got people notice that their almost-murderer is quite cute when they are about to die!! -_- He had nice eyes though.

New Addition to the Family was found after being a New Loss In the Family for 2 days.

Yeap, the title pretty much says it all. That Big Turtle has been found, my predictions were wrong, my brother is saying "SEE IT'S STILL ALIVE" while jumping around with That Big Turtle in his pocket. That Big Turtle by the way looks like it's desperately trying to commit suicide by frantically clawing its way out of my brother's pocket.
Who know, maybe this time it'll manage to succeed in its quest to Escape From The Horrible Torturer Bryan, by jumping to its death from my brother's pocket.

While I shake my head and sigh at that spectacle, Tacky is peacefully slumped beside my keyboard. She looks so peaceful...*affectionate smile*..Uh...too peaceful. Wait a minute while I poke her to check if she's dead.

Right. Sometimes it's better to leave some things untouched.

Today I was surfing through the web, checking up on all sorts of stuff about my beloved Singapore. Airpot, airline, singlish, zoo, currency...Until I smack hy hand against my head and said "WHAT ARE YOU DOING HEIDI A LEVELS IN 2 WEEKS DUMB-BUTT!"

Somehow researching about the French Revolution always leads me to read up about things that are unrelated to my life at present. Like the comments tourists make about Changi Airport.

Ok lah, back to European History. Oh do you know there are four forms of Singapore English? (Singlish that is)

There is the...

Acrolectal: This is the "highest-class" form of speech, used by the well-educated in formal situations. Acrolectal Singaporean English is roughly the same as formal British English, with the exception of some pronunciation differences that occur due to the influence of Singlish pronunciation.

The...

Mesolectal: This is more "middle-class", and is used in formal and semi-formal situations. At this level, features not found in other forms of English begin to emerge.

The...

Basilectal: This is the colloquial speech used by almost everyone, educated or not, in informal settings, and is the speech usually referred to as "Singlish". Here can be found all of the unique phonological, lexical, and grammatical features of Singlish.

And The...

Pidgin: This is the "pidgin" level of Singlish, which is probably a good representative of an earlier stage of Singlish, before creolization took place and solidified Singlish as a fully-formed creole.


Wow. Betcha you didn't know that. And how about this...

The one dollar coin is inscribed with an octagon, which looks like a ba gua, a Chinese lucky charm. Feng Shui masters are believed to have said that the construction of MRT tunnels through downtown Singapore would an adverse effect; they recommended that every household display a bagua to negate this. Bearing in mind that there were many locals who did not adhere to this Chinese belief, this was not possible. Thus the design of the one dollar coin.

Betcha didn't know that either. How amazing right? So utterly ingenious of the Monetary Authority of Singapore to incorporate elements of feng shui a coin so that every household in Singapore will have a feng shui object, and all that without us knowing about it!

Hmm, didn't I mention about studying European history earlier on?

"When the exams of a lifetime are ahead of you, do it the Singaporean way and study like...like a typical Singaporean kiasu/kiasi/kialang student. However if you happen to be Heidi Ng Chinese-name-shall-not-be-mentioned-here, you should just do it the Heidi-way and hug Buddha's leg as well kiss a turtle for good luck. In this case, Tack the cute little turtle is employed for such purposes."

New Loss In The Family.

Blah just days after I posted the post about Flowerpot/Ricebowl, it's lost! And it's not my fault, it's my brother's fault.

If I am the creative brains beihnd turtle-naming in my household, my brother is the "any-pet-I-have-I'll-lose-it-within-a-few-weeks" person. It's not the first turtle he has lost and I doubt it'll be the last. Coincidentally, the first turtle he lost was given to me by a friend, and this turtle he lost was given to him by my mother's friend's husband.

I suspect that this turtle is already 1. wandering outside my house, 2. adopted by another family, 3. dead, 4. gone forever.

Possibly all four. First it would wander out of my house, then someone would see it and exclaim "By golly, what is a turtle doing all the way out here!" Due to the sheer unbelievabilty of a turtle wandering all the way up 13 stories (one wonders how it manages to get into the lift, or even press the 13th storey button), the person would then bring it home and tell his family about it.
The family would then crowd around the turtle trying to see if it's some lucky turtle or turtle-god to have flown up so high, and the turtle being so shocked by all the events of the past 5 min since leaving my house will then expire from fright.
So it's dead. And therefore, it's gone forever.

There, all four possibilities fufilled.

To think my brother would rather watch Tv, scratch his hair, daze around the house than find his turtle. Then when I commented the turtle is gone forever and dead, he'll then say "Don't keep saying that!"

Brothers. Bah.

New addition to the family.

I have a new turtle. Ok it's not mine precisely but my brother's.
It's bigger than Tacky, much more active(actually even a snail is more active than Tacky), and it's a girl.
Being the most creative person in my family when it comes to turtle-naming(I've named at least 6 turtles in my lifetime), I was asked to name that turtle by my brother.

"Har what? Ricebowl lor."

The look of disgust/disdain/dismay on my brother's face and a quickly stifled snort from my mother told me that Ricebowl wasn't a name they liked.

COME ON LAH WHAT'S WRONG WITH RICEBOWL. It's a good name, I think fengshui masters would agree with me. See, that turtle is a living creature, so it will grow. It means that our ricebowls will grow too! So auspicious right. Typical Singaporean mentality.

My brother vehemently opposed the name and he said "I call it Cookie!" and I vehemently opposed.
That's no bloody way you're going to recycle a name from my dead turtle. No way, no how, no why.
"How about Lucky?"
No.
"How about Happy?"
No.
"How about Tacky?"
NO LAH IDIOT.

There's a reason why I'm the most creative person at naming turtles in my family. My brother only thinks about using the names of my late beloved turtles, or of my current turtle.

So I gave him another name to choose from.

"Flowerpot."

It's such a sweet name right. I mean if I were a turtle, I would like being called Flowerpot. Singapore has killer litter and flower pots often fall from high places to land on people's heads, either killing them instantly or maiming them for life. That turtle is rather big and heavy and reminds me of a flowerpot. It's a sweet and yet menacing name at the same time, some more we can stick a flower to its shell and it'll be oh-so-appropriate.
3-in-1 use, like that coffee like that.

Needless to say my brother didn't appreciate this fine name. Also because that turtle is so hyper-active it makes an ant look drugged and Tacky, retarded(again, even a snail makes Tacky look retarded), it gets lost exploring around the house. We have to find or run after it quite often. Within 15 seconds of inattention it can already find its way into the most unlikely of dark places.

So my mother says, and my brother tells me repeatedly, calling it Ricebowl when we have to search for it often, means the same thing in our lives. No a good name in feng shui terms.

Everday my brother will throw out a name or two, sometimes I'll just go "No." othertimes I just have to put on a "it's-lame-lor" look. Equally effective.
Right now that turtle has no name, so it's called "That turtle". Or "That big turtle". Or "That Crazy Turtle."

Actually That Turtle is a rather good name. Alliteration. It sounds rather cool too. Like hip-hop "Yo dat turtle!" *does the hip-hop finger gesture*
Hmmm...

Despite what you read in the Singapore Straits Times about the success of the IMF conference, international media has been lambasting Singapore's strict stance on CSOs. Even our very own Singaporeans have been critisising Singapore's over-management.

Well lets think about it, when it comes down to personal safety, it makes sense to err on the side of caution. If I were a World Bank delegate, I'll feel reassured knowing that all has been done to prevent potential terrorist from planting some bombs near cars or something. Yes perhaps my enjoyment would be marred with the sight of so many policemen, barricades and all that, but I'm not here on a holiday...It's serious business. I can come to Singapore again next time when I'm not part of such a high-profile meeting.

Maybe some people will snort and say "Pfft, yeah right like terrorists will come to Singapore." Then again who would have expected America's World Trade Centre to come to such an end? And please bear in mind that Singapore did have encounters with terrorist even as far back as the 1950s-60s period. Nobody can predict what would happen, publicity for terrorists is still publicity no matter where it happens.

Lets talk about personal freedom for all we want, but for this few weeks of having thousands of important delegates from all over the world, I would rather personal freedom be curtailed for my sake and theirs. And I'm betting if victims of terrorists attacks knew in advance of their misfortunes, they would rather stay barricaded and safe behind steel walls than walk around in the unsafe streets trumpeting protests against the Government's "authoritarian ways".

And speaking of Authoritarian ways, the world bank's president has taken to critisising Singapore's stance. Actually, PR wise it would have been better for him not to say anything. His comments about Singapore breaching IMF's policies, government being authoritarian blah blah blah, speaks too much of self-defense and hypocrisy instead of genuine censure. Even many activists are not buying his words.
Like hello, he should already have known Singapore's strict stance on this, waaaay before the hooplah happened. And it's just not fair of him to say that when Singapore has been trying it's best to ensure his and the safety of all the other delegates.

And speaking of activists, I think they are secretly pleased with the turn of events and are milking the publicity for all it's worth. Simply mention your name, your organisation and your grievances at being banned from Singapore and Voila! You have the publicity you want and the excuse for it. Perhaps even more than what you'll get had you been campaigning in the hallowed hallways of Suntec itself. Well of course maybe not all activists are like that. And even in my opinion some of these activists really shouldn't be banned. But still, compared to the rest of the 700 activists the government allowed and the 22 they banned...there's a huge difference in numbers. The Government wouldn't ban someone for no reason, their records may have not been that clean.

What I'm trying to say here it, perhaps the Government is really quite authoritarian, I am Singaporean after all...But in return we get a safe country, luch and green and not bomb-wrecked. Most people in Singapore do not live below the poverty line, they don't starve, children get mandatory education, we get to choose our own religion, different ethnic groups mix well...

What the heck, we feel safe and secure enough to chafe at the restraints and complaints are as common as air particles in Singapore. The banning of 22 activists whom many would probably not pay much attention to their causes is trivial compared to lives that may be lost and time and effort wasted in case of terrorists attacks/crisis/strikes/riots. Those who have it relativey easy can always complain.

Although I do wish the papers wouldn't gloss over the reports of the IMF. We need to know the truth sometimes for goodness sakes, in this case the truth would probably arouse more loyalty in Singaporeans than protests.

The Beetle and Me.

I've become quite an adept insect-catcher(with the exception of cockroaches), so far I've already caught and released inumerable...beetles. And still I am afraid of them. Blah, familiarity doesn't breed contempt nor fearlessness.

I currently have this active beetle that's trapped underneath a plastic cover, on the table beside me. It's flying around making that freakin scary buzzing noise that insects make(the zzzz-ing noise that will raise all the hairs on my hair when I duck my head or run around screaming). And I can't release it now because it's too late and I just don't feel up to the task of trying to manuevere the plastic sheet beneath the plastic cover to throw the beetle out of the window or outside my house, while trying to keep far away from it.

If only Tacky can catch and eat them. Then again if Tacky doesn't that I don't want her anywhere near me.

I think I shall make a mention of the steamboating I had today with, in alphabetical order, Chiselle, Clemence, Eeeee Wei and Jaslyn. I am waiting for that stomache that'll signal food poisoning to come. Flies everywhere(big big ones), the dead food looks really dead. Stiff, cold, lifeless and eeew slimy. I mean sometimes you can tell whether it's fresh, even though it's dead. The springiness, the colour, the...liveliness is still there. The raw stuff there(with the exception of live crabs and prawns we alas didn't dare to catch nor chop up) were dead, dead.

But it was a fun time. There's still a feeling of pressure from the upcoming A levels but it's been toned down since prelims ended for us. Talking, ouching from oil splatters, hair-y conversations, a little bit nostalgic. Maybe it's just the night that always makes me feel melancholic(which is why I don't like going at night), but I seem to be viewing everyone with shuttered eyes.
Like watching a videotape of events that happened years ago, reminiscising moments that were in the past. I was effectively, living in the present but knowing it wouldn't last. Knowing there's life ahead of us still, obstacles, tragedies, joys and sorrows. And the night of steamboating would be a fond memory among millions of others.

It somehow makes every second more precious. To replay over and over inside my head when there's a need to relive my youth and experiences. Sometimes I think my brain is like a DVD(upgraded from videotape) library, with each memory a dvd and labelled and pack into sections in the library.

Heidi - times when she's a dork(around 80% of the contents in the library)
Friends
Bad episodes
Funny incidents
Lessons to remember
Significant Conversations
Misc.

I particularly like reliving funny stuff. That's why I smile or laugh to myself sometimes, remembering things that happened what, 10 years ago? Or just 10 minutes ago. Alright gotta go now to label some dvds and replay some of them. Ok actually I'm just going to read my downloaded romance novels. Dozens and dozens of them. Dear me, I can't help but laugh gleefully and rub my hands in anticipation when I think of my huge collection. If you want some ROMANCE to pass your time with, drop me a...Dvd. I'll send them to you eagerly.

"Bloody beetle I said I'm sorry already! Can you just stop flitting around and scaring the hair out of me!!!"

Sheryl Crow - Always On Your side

My yesterdays are all boxed up and neatly put away
But every now and then you come to mind
Cause you were always waiting to be picked to play the game
But when your name was called, you found a place to hide
When you knew that I was always on your side

Well everything was easy then, so sweet and innocent
But your demons and your angels reappeared
Leavin' all the traces of the man you thought you'd be
Leavin' me with no place left to go from here
Leavin' me so many questions all these years

But is there someplace far away, someplace where all is clear
Easy to start over with the ones you hold so dear
Or are you left to wonder, all alone, eternally
This isn't how it's really meant to be
No it isn't how it's really meant to be

Well they say that love is in the air, but never is it clear,
How to pull it close and make it stay
Butterflies are free to fly, and so they fly away
And I'm left to carry on and wonder why
Even through it all, I'm always on your side

But is there someplace far away, someplace where all is clear
Easy to start over with the ones you hold so dear
Or are we left to wonder, all alone, eternally
But is this how it's really meant to be
No is it how it's really meant to be

Well if they say that love is in the air, never is it clear
How to pull it close and make it stay
If butterflies are free to fly, why do they fly away
Leavin' me to carry on and wonder why
Was it you that kept me wondering through this life
When you know that I was always on your side

Inwhich the Heart questions the Mind.

If there's one thing to be said for introspection, it's the sheer self-recriminating effect it will induce, so it's good news for self-destructive people(and for therapists and for companies producinf anti-depressents and for the government making all that revenue from taxes in the long run.) Sorry, couldn't resist that bit of economics, considering the paper I'm taking in 14 hours to be exact.

People tend to perceive aloofness as coldness, reservation as snubbery and expressive individuals as being over-the-top.
Ok well here's a tidbit about me, I'm all that and more. I just don't want to bother to explain myself and end up having a snide remark or dismissive attitude thrown my way. Which ironically, seems to gather even more derisiveness. Like a bulldog with a bone, I refuse to give up even that bit of information about myself verbally, so it's here in words...Um...I'm actually very creamy inside. Ok lah besides the cream=fat part. It's also the cream=soft gooey and embarrassingly mawkish part.

I tear up easily at touching movies(I am Sam made me expel half the amount of liquid I had in my body) touching songs, Oprah shows, stupid cheerful flowers, bloody cute babies, mean comments, hurtful gestures, misunderstandings, fluffy white clouds, twinkling little stars, emotional scenes, rain, scenery of mountains...Anymore and I'll cry from embarrassment.

So well, your(as in generally as well as specifically) actions and words do affect me a litt- lot. Sometimes I allow it, sometimes I don't. Sometimes even if I don't allow it, it happens. Sometimes it doesn't even make a dent in my veneer of construction confidence. And sometimes I just wish I have a pillow to hug(or throw at you perhaps). Sometimes Tacky will look at me, do her little nodding thing and try to crawl away from me. So I'll tell Tacky, "Okie, fine! Blah." And sometimes I think I digress so much because it's so hard to get to the point.

Maybe I should be more emotional you think? No one, has ever told me "Oh my gawd you're such an open-book and anymore open your pages are going to fall off." Sometimes I do wish they'll do that. Most of the times I don't. Maybe I've got to stop flinching inwardly and do it outwardly. Or be so stoic about it all.

But I think I've never stopped being the awkward little girl, clumsy and homely, uncertain and insecure, always yearning, never reaching. And I'm afraid to show it. Then again, aren't all us a little like that inside?

Oh well Heidi, you do care. Maybe too damn much.

Traversing the Night Sky...

Transience

Glittering, as you bleed across the obsidian sky.
Sparkling, shimmering,
you start your life in a blaze of liquid gold.
Burning silent and swift,
your traverse awe earthbound mortals of flesh and bones.

A blink,
and you're gone.
A twinge of sadness.
But your trail lingers on in my mind,
and I wish upon that remnant of your magic.
Memories would suffice when the glory's gone.

In the course of this week(and not even half the week has gone by yet) there have been both good and bad news.

Here's the bad news. Steve Irwin, Croc Hunter, died after being stung by a sting ray. I'm sure everybody knows that. And probably 9 out of 10 would mourn his death. The other 1 person is probably a pessimistic loner with sadistic tendencies and existential angst.
I only hope Irwin would be in Croc heaven now. There goes another one of Mother Nature's knight-errant, in a death of a freakish nature. The previous one being Dian Fossey's murder. If Jane Goodall died next I'll be knock my head against the wall.
However, my greatest sympathies, lies not with Steve(who probably died doing what he loved) but with his wife and children instead, especially his wife.

I read somewhere once that she too became involved in what he did because the fear for his life would otherwise be too much for her to bear. If Steve was a police officer, she would also train to be a police officer.

Once this sadness has lessened, I do hope she and her children would carry on Irwin's work of bringing endangered animals into the spotlight and concerns of people. This would bring them closer to Irwin and also provided a much needed exposure for the animals of the wildlife. And I must admit, it's also because I do like seeing animals on TV. There's something about seeing a tiger cub being cuddled that brings on warm, maternal feelings and "SO F******** cute" exclamations.

Now at least the second news is a good one. However it brings along a derisive feeling from me too. Can anyone guess what it is? Yes!(whether you guessed it right or not) it's the birth of a "a long awaited heir" to the throne of Japan. I'm glad for the family, I really am. But it just means Japan will be one step further away from the idea of female empowerment. Tradionalist, conservatives(I bet most of them are males) are opposed to the idea of changing the rule that only male heirs are accepted on the throne. Now with the birth of a male heir, plans to change that plan would be shelved.

That brings on my feminist outrage and Hippolytic tendencies to fight against this clearly sexist ruling. In my extremely humble opinion, this only shows further how some Japanese men(and not women I hope) are a throw-back to the medieval times of "women are inferior to men" and modern Japan actually has some educated people who are outdated, outmoded and sexist. Right I only hope I wouldn't be fined for saying that.

There are very few jobs that actually requires a vagi - female or male sexual organs, including being a figurehead ruler. Look at Queen Elizabeth the Second, or Queen Victoria or the Virgin Queen, I don't think they did their jobs any worse than the mad king George or dissipated prince regent. I should stop before I list down all the female rulers from ancient times till now.



"The test for whether or not you can hold a job should not be the arrangement of your chromosomes." ~Bella Abzug

"The only jobs for which no man is qualified are human incubators and wet nurse. Likewise, the only job for which no woman is or can be qualified is sperm donor." ~Wilma Scott Heide


Sometimes the best man for the job isn't.

Baggage - everyone has them. They come in a variety of size and shape, weight and content. Some people go through life feeling crushed, suffocated and strangled by theirs, some skip through, barely feeling the weight of their own. Some march on until they one day collapse from exhaustion and finally acknowledge the burden they carried all the while. While some manage to walk along normally until one day they keel over and in surprise, realise the existence of their baggage.

How do we deal with these weights? Or do we even deal with them at all? Perhaps they are an inevitable part of life, as we live and experience sorrow and pain. Maybe they are the remnants of childhood, forever there to prick your heart when you least expect it. Most probably, they'll haunt you through life, memories that will replay itself over and over again for years to come.

The passing of time would lighten some of these burdens, as rememberance steadily gets vague and scabs would grow over those old wounds. What happens if they don't go away?

Maybe one day, we'll finally find the courage to stop and put down the hurt and pain we've been carrying. We'll patiently, painstakingly, soothe the individual scars and put band-aids over them. That day could come early in the path of our lives, enabling us to walk on triumphantly and achieve things we otherwise couldn't. Or perhaps that day would come in the twilight of our years, while we're out on the porch drinking a glass of wine, gazing into the unforgotten past. After that, we'll then be able to smile at our children, our grandchildren with genuine joy and without the glimpse of regret reflecting from our eyes.

Until then, we'll have to draw in our breaths, hitch up our burdens, square our shoulders and plod on as gracefully as we can while being weighed down by our past and future hurts.

Baggage - everyone has them.

Hmm, people have asked why am I so materialistic. I am not what!! Ok I admit, I just like being rich. I mean, I'm not rich but I would like to be rich. Will wealth bring me happiness though? I don't know, I'm not looking for it to give me happiness.

I know wealth doesn't necessarily bring happiness, seriously I know. I've seen first-hand what it can mean for a family. Imagine this, in today's paper, Forbes list of the wealthiest people in Singapore? He's in the top 10.

He's veeeeeerrrrryyyyy nice. And generous. And man do I not want to be in his situation. Because of him, so many in my family has been given opportunities. However, if given a choice, I would rather need not depend on his wealth.

But the reality is, I'm probably already living a little off it. That's quite sobering and humbling to know. Therefore, even if he doesn't expect it, I'll be standing on his side if anything should happen. Now and in future.

I'm sorry if this all sounds a little cryptic. It's for security reasons. I think.

When all else fails, hug Buddha's leg.

After many long winded chats with several teachers, I've decided I want to go to an American Uni and take business courses.
But as always, it's easier said than done. And how am I going to fork out the Ks and more Ks needed to pay for my expenses? Well there are several ways, including pledging my body...to the Singapore Government. But they may not even want me anyways. ._.

I think I have a convincing argument in case they want me to state why I should get a loan/scholarship from them.
"Singapore is in need of people who have critical thinking skills. Look at me, I don't study for exams and yet I don't panic when I come face to face with them. Because I think critically. I could either a) hug Buddha's leg b) cheat c)bullsh*t my way through d) study the night before. Instead of doing one of them, I do all! And I'm so successful at it I ended up in JC, when I could have splattered my head against the wall instead. How's that for critical thinking?"

Right. Maybe they'll get me a place at the Institute of Mental Health. Or in a lab as a test subject for curing oddity in human behaviour. Maybe both.

Maybe I should really go hug Buddha's leg.

When idle, pluck a hair.

Sometimes, when I have nothing to do, I go a-plucking. I'm a human, I grow hair on my arms and legs. I am also a female, and females do all they can to remove hair from themselves.

I do it manually, with the appendages that nature has given me. In short, I pluck my own hair. Like how professional people pluck off lint from their Armani jackets, I pluck off hair from my yellow skin.

I am so well-versed in the art of plucking hair(and I don't even need to use a thread) I can pluck of many strands of hair at one go, and I wouldn't even feel a thing! How amazing is that.

I decided to prove my expertise of hair-plucking on my friends. At first they shrieked and say "No, pain pain!"
Then they relented when I said, "No, no pain no pain." I put my fingers on their arms and with a flick of my wrist, the hair(s)'s out! They'll go "Har, it's out already!"

Now the girls want me to do plucking for them. -_- Now, I charge. 10 cents per strand of hair, so that'll be US$1m for all the hair on your body.

Eh... Who's that?

Our school tries to get students to greet teachers whenever they walk pass them. When I was in my sec school, it was common-place. We were expected to bow and greet teachers and may be reprimanded if we do not. In Jc however, it's an entirely diferrent matter.

Eyes would widen and whispers would start if a student is seen bowing respectfully and greeting a teacher. Ok lah, maybe it's not that bad, but it's still weird all the same. I have a theory as to why it's harder for students to open their mouths to say "good morning Mr/Ms/Lim/Tan/Ong/Blah blah". The theory is...the students don't know half the teachers in their school! Since we're divided into arts and science streams, and also because there are so many teachers teaching same subject, we wouldn't really know many teachers unless were acquainted with them.

Like me, I don't even know 1/3 of the teachers in my school, much less their names. I think even teachers would find it weird if I suddenly greet them when they have no idea who I am and I don't think I've even seen them before.
I may even mistakenly greet the school cleaners as teachers!

Today, during the morning assembly(which was going slowly and yawn-inducing as usual) this rather distinguised(ok more distinguished looking if one were to compare him with our "wear same shape in different colours everyday" principal) step out to talk to us. My first thought was, "Who's this teacher? I never see him before eh."

Nadz from the class beside mine said "It's our Vice-Principal dear..."
"Oh...well...I've never seen him before!"
I don't even know how many vice-principals my school has! Much less their names or how they look like. Isn't it quite sad...Not really. If he is the richest man in Singapore though, I'll be devasted that I didn't know him.

Of a bewildered uncle and (almost-ending) school life.

I manage to embarrass myself even in the most unlikely of places. The lift. Ok people can embarrass themselves in the lift, it's quite a common occurence. Farting, burping, you know all that.
But I didn't do any of the above stuff. In fact I was alone in the lift. So being the energetic person that I am, I'll usually sing in the lift. Yesterday however, I decided to strike some poses. Some...not so glamourous poses. Unfortunately, I've forgotten that my lift has two glass panes from which outsiders can look in and insiders can look out as the lift goes up or down.

Oh well, as you can imagine, I was doing a um, chest out, arms at waist, face screwed up in a mock come-hither look pose when I caught a glimpse of this middle-aged man through the glass pane. The lift went up quite fast, however it apparently wasn't fast enough since he could still spare around 1 sec to give an astonished look at my current embarassing position. While I could spare the time to widen my eyes, and say a big loud "Whoops!" to no one in particular.

I ended up giggling, ok cackling, all the way back to my apartment. I think several of my neighbours heard my laughter as well. But they're probably used to it, since whenever I pass by their apartments, I'll make a face in their (closed, but reflective) window panes. "Oh that weird girl again, nothing new then!"

Any wonders why I live near Woodbridge?

Ok embarrassing situations aside, this week or the next would probably be the last week of official school days. I can't belive I'm going to say this but, I'll miss nanyang, I'll miss being a student, I'll miss wearing the uniform, I'll miss pissing the teachers off, miss falling asleep during econs lecture, miss running late(literally) to and for school. The end of JC life for me, would effectively be the end of being a student! University doesn't count. And that's assuming I can get into the U.

Before I forget my school life experiences, I shall post about them here, so I can read them when I'm old and saggy next time. That's assuming if blogger's still around, world wars haven't destroyed us, and most importantly, if I'm still alive and wriggling.

Stay tune for something-ly(could be daily, could be weekly, heck it could even be rarely) installments of Heidi's almost ending school life!

Looney tunes theme: That's all folkies!

Giving in to the inevitable.

Ever since I turned 18 a month ago, my every waking thought has been filled with "Omg I'm 18 I should be doing stomething constructive with my life!!!"
Ok lah, not every waking thought, just every other moment.

I'm an adolescent now, pretty soon I'll be a young adult, then offcially an adult, then a middle-aged adult, then a senior citizen, then deceased.

What do I construe as constructive? Why, getting married of course! I want to get married. Like, now. Like oh gawd, come save me from this life of Alevels-in-2month's-time-and-I-sooo-freaking-haven't-studied-yet.

I asked a classmate of mine today, "don't you want to get married with your boyfriend now?" She looked at me weirdly and said "Noooo, why would I want to get married now??"
Well, for a start, her boyfriend's 28, that's 10 years older than her. Ok that's not much of a reason. Anything to me, can be considered a logical reason to get married.

A dashing, filthy rich, tall dark duke. Come come, come get me.
I should really stop reading Judith Macnaughts, and start reading my John Slomans instead. But the thing is, your mind tends to wander when you're trying hard to make yourself study for the first time ever since you came into this world bawling.
I think why most babies cry when they get born is because they just know the life ahead of them is going consist of maths tests with red slashes over them and then when you finally survive through the stage of homework, it's time to pay bills and taxes.

Does this post belong under the section of teena--no, adolescent, angst? Because I've not many more months left to be immature and kiddish and still be justified because I'm still considered an ungrown-up.

Why am I still wasting my time posting here when I should be...should be doing something else! Like studing for history and carrying the weight of the whole Ng clan's expectations!!!!! Ok , I was just exaggerating about the Ng clan thing. It's just half the Ng clan. Instead, I'm still here playing Neopets and Maplestory and other games.

On a good, or sort-of good note, here's this quote I read from the school's Tv today.
"It is not because things are difficult that we do not dare; it is because we do not dare that they are difficult." It's by this guy Seneca, he's um...Famous and dead. About 2,000 years ago.

I like this quote, it applies to me whenever I knock my head against the wall just thinking about the A maths exam I'm about to take but have made absolutely no preparations for. Whenever I think about A maths now, I'm going to think Seneca. Yes, I shall dare to do it. Uh huh.

Maybe next time.

Pork gravy Not dried up.

The title of this post, is what's written on a piece of paper that's posted to the wall behind my computer. In other words, when I look up from my screen, I can see this piece of paper, and the message, fluttering in its pasted position.

I was amused when I first saw it, rather ingenious for my mother to have thought of that. Judging from the ugly handwriting, my mother should have instructed my brother to write it and to paste it there.
They would know the computer's where I'll be at, so that would be the way for me to notice my task, that is to look after the pork stew cooking in my kitchen right now. They probably thought I'd forget to look after the stew. They'll be wrong, who can forget the cooking stew when the aroma of it, wafts through the house, tempting me to stick a spoon into it and sip it all up.

Which reminds me, I've just about forgotten to look after the stew while I'm typing this post. Toodles.

"Can you smeeell what the pork is cooking!"

Why you should always wear nice bras.

I went for a facial today, at this big big spa that my aunt forced me to go last year.
It was all usual, walk in take off your shoes, absorb the plush surroundings, pay a few hundred. Listen to the people say "Wow you're so young!" I swear, everytime I go there someone will tell me that I'm so young. People stopped saying I'm young ever since I turned 13, five years ago.
But I can probably understand them, after all this is the beauty industry, youth is a virtue and most of their clients are rich tai-tais over 40 years of age.
So I was an anomaly there. This beautician asked me how old I was, "Uh 18?"
"How I wish I could be that young again."
"Gulp."

However today's facial was soooo...not usual.
The facial went on well enough intially. Take off shirt(the beautician had to remind me to do that, when I wore the robe over my shirt instead),
wear a robe(I tied the sash VERY tight around my waist, so as not to let anything show),
grit my teeth,
tense my muscles and prepare for the bloody painful extraction process.
While poking at my delicate skin(buahah), the beautician kept saying I have very thin skin. It's kinda ironic, after all I'm quite thick-skin figuratively, but alas physically it's not true.

I have sensitive, thin skin and that's why you can see the veins on my face so easily. And that's why Hui Ting once told me the veins on my face look like sperms. And that's why it was probably a little more painful for me. And perhaps that's why I can never get a tan, and instead look like, like I have leukemia since I bruise easily. And that's why I teared throughout the extraction because it bloody hurts. WHAT THE HELL LAH.

Anyways, to make the long story short, the beautician did something that totally mortified me. I had these cotton wool over my eyes, so I couldn't see anything, then suddenly, without warning, the beautician pulled back the towel covering me and started to untie the sash at my waist and then pull apart the robe I was wearing, all the way down to my stomach. A couple of thoughts ran through my mind...
"OMG WHAT IS SHE DOING!!!!"
"Thank God, Buddha, Allah I'm wearing my rather nice black sports bra today."
"BUT WHAT THE HELL IS SHE DOING!!!!"
Then she slid the straps off my shoulders and I almost squeaked out like a rabbit(or do rabbits squeak? I don't really want to compare myself to a rat) there and then. Please bear in mind I couldn't see anything at that point. And she said, "Would you like me to massage your shoulders?"
And I promptly gurgled out "No..."
And she slid the straps back.

Ok I shall not get too graphic anymore. But as soon as she was out of the rooms, I pulled the robe tightly around myself again.
I was horrified, mortified and probably blushing like a tomato then. Maybe the rest of the clients are used to this sort of service, and I don't mean it in a lewd way. I do see some bras hanging around on hangers at the changing rooms. The tai-tais are alright with exposing themselves. BUT I'M NOT. I'm still a kid! And despite all my worldly pretense, I'm quite a prude!!! And a bit innocent!! SO NO SLIPPING BRA STRAPS OFF MY SHOULDERS! And for that matter, don't even come anywhere near my chest!
I shuddered at the thought that it may have been a man instead.

Sigh, the thing about going to spas and all that, they always want you to strip and wear comfortable robes. I'd rather keep my shirt on thank-you-very-much. But ALWAYS, always they manage to see through my robe, see the shirt underneath it and say "You must take off your shirt dear..."
While I squeak out meekly "I have to????"
and they'll say "Of course!" and give a small smile.
If they were men, I would have ran out of that spa for my life by then. But they weren't men. I couldn't decide if that made it better or worse. =I am very paranoid about these things, it's a bone-deep fear cultivated from childhood trauma. T_T

The Look of Love
Chris Botti Feat. Chantal Kreviazuk

The look of love is in your eyes
A look your smile can't disguise
The look of love is saying so much more than just words could ever say
And what my heart has heard, well it takes my breath away

I can hardly wait to hold you, feel my arms around you
How long I have waited
Waited just to love you, now that I have found you

You've got the
Look of love, it's on your face
A look that time can't erase
Be mine tonight, let this be just the start of so many nights like this
Let's take a lover's vow and then seal it with a kiss

I can hardly wait to hold you, feel my arms around you
How long I have waited
Waited just to love you, now that I have found you
Don't ever go
Don't ever go

This is the 1/2nd day of my period!
What did I say about my blog being my ovulation cycle?

I don't know why but I have this tendency to be a little more fragile/vulnerable/soft during my bloody days. For example, this time, I have flu, cough and lack of energy. A few days every month is still alright, but this is happening during the week of tests and more tests! Waking up in the mornings never seem more difficult.

Today I thought I lost my textbook, feeling panicked, I clutched the books I was holding to my chest and shook my bag to see if my book was inside. It wasn't! Then I thought back on where I last left my textbook, it was at a coffeeshop, underneath my 8 days magazine...I took the 8 days with me...oh...I was clutching the textbook. -_-

Oh! My Lord!

OhFrom Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
(Redirected from Henry Miles Fitzalan-Howard)
Jump to: navigation, search
Henry Miles Fitzalan-Howard, Earl of Arundel and Surrey (born 3 December 1987) is the eldest son of Edward Fitzalan-Howard, 18th Duke of Norfolk, and his wife, Georgina.

As his father's heir apparent he is styled Earl of Arundel and Surrey by courtesy. The Earldom of Arundel held by his father is the oldest extant Earldom in the Peerage of England, and possibly the oldest extant peerage in England.

As a Howard, he is related to Elizabeth I of England, Anne Boleyn and Catherine Howard. He is also, through the Howards, descended from Edward I of England.

Retrieved from "http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Henry_Fitzalan-Howard%2C_Earl_of_Arundel_and_Surrey"


Make him tall and make him handsome. But most of all, make him mine.

MUAHS GALORE FOR SINGAPORE!

Happy birthday Singapore!
Let me say how much I love this home that has nurtured me for 18 years,
provided me with education, peace and prosperity. It has a special place in my heart and will always remain first and foremost, my home.

Also, I'll have to thank Singapore's founding father, Mr Lee Kuan Yew. Many youngsters these days do not understand the extent of contributions which this man had and still is, given to us and this country. Without him I doubt so many of us would still be so smug and have such fortunate lives compared to other countries.

I LUBBB EU SINGAHPORRRRRRRRR!! MUAHS MUAHS!!!
I'm sorry, only baby-talk is adequate to express my affection for Xin Jia Po!

“?????????????,
?????????????"


????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

Just trying out my chinese.
So I've died for a few weeks already huh. Well I'm back! AT least for this post. All's well. Tacky's fine. Mid-year results fine. At least I didn't get F. GP was horrendous. Lowest english grade in my whole life. But I still passed. Heimo heimo.
Which I should be thankful for.

So yes, end of today's post! Am watching Prince Turn Into Frog now. FINALLY. After like 8months of waiting for it. Yoohoo!
Heidi's fantasies of marrying a rich handsome guy and tall and dark too! fufilled on tv! Though I'm not the girl inside, but it's ok!IAt least if it's shown on TV it means it may happen in reality...to me!
Ok *slap slap* stop daydreaming Heidi.
"Stars shining bright above me...Night breezes seem to whisper "Heidi you're sooo gonna be rich one day..Dream a little dream of $$!"

Love me, love my boobs.

In my entry on the kind of man I want
I put intelligence and depth as one of my criterion.
When I re-read that entry, I realise how tiring it would be if every conversation with him would be on deep deep things and issues. Also, if he only likes my brain and wit, then what would be the point of dressing up to tantalise him! I wouldn't mind if he occass...frequently says, "Hey babe, lookin' good!" Yah lor yah lor, I think so too. HAHAHA.

So yeah, he should love my boobs too. But only because they are mine.



"Don't go lovin' anyone else's boobs or I'll slap the heck out of ya!"

Yesterday, or since it's 12am now, yesterday's yesterday, I watched an episode of OPRAH WINFREY.
It was a very uplifting episode and I mean that literally. For all the women out there, the show was on finding the perfect bra and correct size for your boobs. As well as finding jeans that'll make you look taller, slimmer and sexier.
I so needed to watch that episode then.

The amazing satistic on the show is about 9/10 of American women get their bra size wrong. So all the women who came of the show, they actully had larger boob size than they thought they had. For example, "I used to think I was a 36B but I'm actually a 34 double-d." Even for one like me who knows next to balls(pun) about bra sizes, from a B to a Double-D is one heck of a leap. So I wondered if I was wearing the wrong bra size. Maybe I'm a 72C or something! Then I looked down at my assets, saw my toes and laughed to myself. Maybe not. Even my dad has a bigger chest than I do.

What I've learnt is, short girls(like me) shouldn't wear boot cut jeans. I was so excited about this discovery I went to tell all the short girls I saw the next day. Jaslyn and Clemence. HAHAHA. Ok if you're below 5'4 you're short. 5'4 is around 165 or something. I'm waaay below that so I don't even need to think for a moment if I'm short. I'm a veritable dwarf. No wait, an elf. Yes a pixie. Please don't say gnome or I'll just slap you lah.
The Jeans expert said that we need to wear jeans that'll lengthen our legs and shorten our torsos. Okay, all along I've long legs and a very short torso, if I'm going to wear jeans that'll further lengthen my legs and shorten my torso, wouldn't I look extremely weird? By the way, believe it or not, my legs are around the same length, sometimes even longer, than those of girls who are 10 or more cm taller than me. So it's my body that's wrong! All wrong! Too short! Where people's waists normally are, my hips are there instead. So they'll be measuring my hips instead of waist. -_- So sad lah.

Clemence asked, "What's a boot cut?"
Heidi: "Um..."
Jaslyn: "It's jeans that go straight down...(or something like that)"
Heidi: "Ah yes yes. Well the thing is, we can't wear that because it'll make our legs look like shortened stumps."

I need a new bra, I need a new pair of jeans. I need money.

So my exams are almost over, as usual I did not study. End of story. Also, I have not bought my literature textbooks.
One particularly annoying paper was the history one. We were supposed to do 3 essays, so when I got the question paper, I eagerly turned to the section with the essay questions. The instructions read "Choose 3 questions." Below it were exactly 3 questions. I hoped against hope that it was a printing error. Then I heard the myriad exclamations of "Shit" around me and I knew then. Choose 3 out of 3 questions. WHAT THE BLOODY HELL LAH. I wanted to write, "this is not funny lor" on the question paper. Mr Carrot must have been behind this sardonic attempt at humour. Very well, Bua. Ha. Ha. Each question needed the knowledge of two topics, with 8 chapters in each topic. So those who were unlucky enough to have skip these 3 topics. Too bad har. I myself did not study one of the topics needed. Too bad har.

I think my mid-year results would be B, E and E. Or C, E, O. Both looks good. Busy Bee, Clever Ceo.

Ok good night and good luck everyone.

"Bra la la, bra la la, bra la la, I need a bra la la..."

The birds and the bees.

Isn't it funny how life can change drastically in the matter of days? Your world could be turned upside-down. Your boyfriend could have broken up with you. Your pet could have died.
Fortunately, none of these things had happened to me. My life hasn't changed drastically and everything I've just said above doesn't apply to me.

My beloved WU GUIs(turtles) are not dead - yet. In fact, I've gotten new pets! Rather unconventional ones. One is green and bug-eyed too! No, it's not a turtle.
It's a...Um how should I put this. A praying mantis.

Yes, you've read right. I now have a praying mantis as a pet. All right, not a pet exactly, more like a plant guest.(Can't say it's a house guest cuz it doesn't live in my house. It lives among my plants.) It ended up in my kitchen one day and I have no idea how it got there. Like I live on the 13th floor for goodness sakes, praying mantis do not just fly up 13 stories.
Perhaps a bird brought it up here to snack on it but forgot to bring it back to the nest because it was so enamoured of the dustbin in my kitchen.(Yes, bloody mynahs often snack on the contents of that dustbin, leaving a mess both poop and food.)

So it now roams among my plants, gets poked at, at least 10 times a day by my brother and gets gawked at whenever we feel like voyeurs.
What's its purpose among my plants? Well, my brother has this idea that perhaps the P.M can snack on the caterpillars that are annoying my mom and her plants. My mom even approved of the idea, as long as the P.M doesn't snack on her plants instead. As a precaution, I fed a piece of chicken to the P.M today in case it got hungry. The meat fell onto the P.M's abdomen and I didn't remain long enough to see what happened to the meat.

The second unofficial pet is a hummingbird. This hummingbird has been flying around the plants and sucking nectar from one. If I saw it just once I wouldn't have remarked about it. However I've seen it twice and my brother sees it occasionally. I think the bird comes back almost everyday to see if the flower has refilled with nectar. It's a hummingbird for goodness sakes. Hummingbirds don't just fly up to the 13th floor to suck at some tiny flowers. Perhaps it flitted by one day for fun and found out this amazing store of nectar just there for the picking. It's yellow with black feathers and beak. Quite small, flies very fast, makes a very high-pitch chirping noise(whenever it sees the flowers) and leaves after a minute of sucking.

In case you didn't get the point after reading the whole post...I LIVE ON THE 13TH FLOOR!!! Besides cockroaches, lizards, ants and turtles, why are there such other strange animals in my house?? Well, at least I should be thankful the P.M and H.B aren't cockroaches or big big bees. I get them often too. Height doesn't deter animals nowadays. By feathers or by getting born in the house, they'll get into anyone's house, anytime.

The next piece of news is, I got shown on TV again. At the most inconspicuous moments that I had hoped no one would noticed but apparently everyone does.


"I'm cute, I'm green, and I'm a praying mantis."

Midnight Rainbows.

Another thing to add to the list of what my future husband absolutely must be/have...
HE MUST AT LEAST LIKE MY TURTLE(S). It's ok if he doesn't love them, but he should accept them as part of the family.
Oh yah, must like kids too.

I realise how much I want to do in this lifetime, and I think I should make a list to remember all of them. One way or another, I shall fufill these wanderlust of mine, this yearning for adventure and new experiences. I'm an experience junkie!

So first up on my list of things-to-do/places-to-visit
Seeing the Aurora Borealis. The Northern Lights. The paintings in the sky.
I'm sure many of you would like to experience it for yourself. The stillness of the night. The crisp cold, and ice clouds you make as you breathe out. The utter stillness of the night. The silent awe that overcomes you as you watch the amazing display of brilliant, radiant, coloured hues dancing over the horizon, over you, all around you. The sky awashed with the glow of the celestial, heavenly Aurora Borealis.

YES OH YES I WANT TO EXPERIENCE THAT. Winter is my favourite season for a reason.

Thing(s) that I wish I could tell people sometimes

I'm quite a nice girl really, you might like me if you know me better.

The Secrets of Heidi's Desires.

On a night this when it's quiet and tranquil...Ok maybe not that quiet and tranquil, since I can still hear my dad snoring over the next room and the barking of neighbours' dogs. Anyway, my point is, when everyone else is asleep, I'm awake and typing this blog entry.

What do I want to talk about today? In fact, what do I want to talk about everyday? So much stuff, but perhaps most of all, what I look for in a future husband.
Ha HA Ha. If I had a panda for every time I think of my future husband, pandas would be one of the most populous animal in China...And that says a lot.

Lets see, despite what many might think, wealth and looks isn't one of the most important things I look for. In fact, they are the most important. Just kidding.
Though I really, really, wouldn't mind if he is that. Really really wouldn't mind.

Heidi's man should be a...Man. No, not those Neanderthal, hairy, unhygenic type who would drag his wife about by the hair. Nor a masochistic, chauvinistic male who thinks a woman's place should be at his feet, in a kitchen, or at home nursing one of his endless offspring.

No, what I mean by a Man is that stability, reliability, responsibility, protectiveness, concern, consideration for his family as well as his ability to support one. Whyfor get married if you have to be the one constantly wiping his butt after him, coddling, and providing shelter and food for him. Definately a gigantic, absolute NO from me. I've had enough of that kind of men in my life.

So yes, what else? He has to be strong, strong enough to stand up to me. Ok, despite the fact that I'm generally very easy-going like the famous yellow Smiley Face, I have this little stubborn, opinionated, domineering aspect of myself tucked away somewhere. Also I'm a little bit manipulative, selfish, unreasonable, sulky, pouty. A liiiittle. He has to see past all that of course, and not get run over by me too. BUT he also has to be reasonable enough to listen to me and not just try to force his decisions/opinions on me(which shall bring me to another point later). I really disliked getting pushed into things I have no wish to do. More than dislike, it's when I'll be like a stubborn horse, digging my hooves into dirt and refusing to be dragged away. Over my bloody cute dead body.
Yes, he must be understanding.

Actually, I find intelligence and depth sexy. Don't you just love a man who can say "Your views on Socratic Morals are intriguing blah blah blah..." besides, "Hi babe, great boobs!" He needs to have that depth and intensity, that passion and ambition that...that something! Why do I want that? It's becauuse I'm unfortunately/fortunately a little like that myself. Don't laugh. It's become a bit of the bane of my existence seeing that I seem to scare people away with too much deep talk that goes beyond their borders, when all I really want to do is stop chattering and start discussing. Yeap, respect me like I'd respect him. Give his all, like I'd give all of mine.

I think it is the person who is intense, who'd be equally deep in his relationships. When I talk of love, I don't want a tepid romance. I want a soul-shattering one that leaves me torn, confused, breathless, blind, passionate, exhilarated, joyful and willing to descend to hell and more just for him, that gamut of emotions all rolled into one delightful eternal love affair.

So he mustn't be Christian. HA HAH HAH HA. Christians have to love God more than anything else. It's an impossibility for me. I can't love God more than I love my family. Perhaps more than I love myself, but not more than my beloved. That is, if I even believe in a God. I'm agnostic. Christianity would be a bone of contention, if he wants me to convert, and like the stubborn horse I am, I'd refused. I'm spiritual, but not religious. And yes, there is a difference. No heaven and hell for me. No eternal doom or salvation.

Love of course. Love above all? Maybe. Sure, you can't feed on love, but it has a way for making you happy even with the simplest life, the smallest morsel of bread. It has a way of making you see things with a rose coloured veil over your eyes. Or maybe not. Perhaps love would be the cause of all dissention, resentment, hatred...It could be pretty self-destructive. And Lord knows I have a tendency to be a teensy-bit self-destructive.

Be a possesive guy if he must, but not overbearing, a little jealous but not ridiculously so. I don't live my life for a person, but I could share it with him. Not only with him though, but the bigger part of it would be his.

What am I looking for? A tender, sexy, mature man? Oh yes yes yes. Rich and good-looking, with a tight butt, six-pack? YES YES AND YES. Playful and in love? *Thoughtfully with a secretive smile* Duh. And funny too.
So much I'm looking for in a man eh? Who's this paragon then? My dream lover. HAHA.
He visits me during the darkness, when night breezes stirs the music of my wind chimes, whisper promises and keep them in the future of golden fields and white picket fences. *Sighs dreamily*

He must have his faults too you know. Imperfection is perfection in its way. Perhaps a tortured soul with a broken heart, all my own to mend and kiss it better. A little brash and irascible, my own to tame. *GRINS*

Oh gosh Heidi, you've gone and done it again. Now China has one more panda to contend with.


You ask how many kises...

Lesbia, you ask how many kisses of yours
would be enough and more to satisfy me.
As many as the grains of Libyan sand
that lie between hot Jupiter’s oracle,
at Ammon, in resin-producing Cyrene,
and old Battiades sacred tomb:
or as many as the stars, when night is still,
gazing down on secret human desires:
as many of your kisses kissed
are enough, and more, for mad Catullus,
as can’t be counted by spies
nor an evil tongue bewitch us.

Food Orgy

Yesterday I had two major eating events. One was in the afternoon where I was forced to go with my mom and bro to eat a buffet at a hotel for lunch. Along with her boss.
Two was when I was forced to eat seafood at East Coast for dinner, along with my whole family this time. Along with my other relatives.

Lets talk about number one first. Normally I wouldn't spurn any opportunity to eat at an acclaimed buffet but hey, we're eating with my mom's boss! Potential socially awkward situation here! However, as it was a treat by some manager of a hotel and my mom's kids were invited, I had to go. So before the lunch commenced I was thinking of whether to call the boss, Mrs Something, or Aunty Something. Aunty is too familiar a term, it speaks of a relationship between relatives or close family friends. This is my mom's boss. So how about Mrs Something? That'll be weird, she's not my teacher, neither is she my boos. Moreover, it's sounds a little servile.

So I settled for calling her...Nothing. Just a simple hi and a wave.
Lunch was nubbad though. I ate like I was a pig. As usual.

Number two. Normally I wouldn't spurn any opportunity to eat seafood at an acclaimed seafood restaurant but hey, we've just eaten at a buffet! Potentially fattening situation here! However, as it was to celebrate/commemorate/mourn/I-really-don't-know-what-term-to-use-here my aunt's(my real aunt this time) before her depature to Australia on yesterday itself, and my mom's family was invited, I had to go. So before the dinner, I was thinking if I should eat everything or just a little. I even brought Tacky along as an ingredient in case there wasn't enough food to be eaten. She could be fried with sambal chilli, not bad eh. Hey, she is considered seafood after all. (Oh btw, Tacky is my cute little green turtle.)
My aunt also gave my bro and I some money. Mom told us to go thank her. That was awkward for me, I mean how do you thank some one who gave you money? "Hi, thanks for your money??"

So I settled for just a simple wave and a thank you. My aunt did wave back though.
I also settled for eating everything that was served to us. We even "da pao" the extras home. Black Pepper Crab, expensive garupa or something(I could have sworn that it was the fish I saw swimming in the tank at the restaurant. At that time, I also could have sworn the fish was crying out for help not to be eaten.) Since it was already cooked, I couldn't reject the offering. The fish was extremely fresh.

So there we have it, I should name yesterday, the Eating Day. Today, in dread I weighed myself. Surprisingly, I lost weight. I think I should go eat some more next time.

"Eating after wakihng up, and then before going to sleep, is a good way of losing weight."

Singapore Idols? MY FOO...I mean, oh.

Yesterday, while my mom was in the shower, I was outside watching SINGAPORE IDOL. Amidst my shouts of, "Omg, that's so horrible." My mom could hear the howling of the idol contestants. I mean, they weren't really that bad per se but HARLOW this is national Tv here! This is Singapore Idol!!!! It's not Karaoke Idol held in your school or something.

She too was muttering to herself(yes in the shower, and yes loud enough for it to travel through doors) "This kind of people they also let in..."
Alright so she was meaner in her comments than I was. But I was thinking that too. Some of the performances induced cringes in me.

When she came out of the shower, she said to me, "You should join Singapore Idol."
In case you took it as a compliment..."Those kind of people can also get in, you might get in too."

I was thinking, "Yeah, yeah!" But really, I think I can do better than some of the contestants. HAHAHAHHAH. Ok, I might just be deluding myself.
I think last year's batch was better. Or maybe it's just time that put a rosy, nostalgic glow on things.

Ok, who are my most loyal readers ah? Who are the people who still coming daily even though I've wrote absolutely nothing but nuts??(Besides Maggie, she's been a self-confessed fan since I was a pretty kid in Sec sch.)
Who are the people who know parts of myself that others may not know, even if they don't see me everyday. Or even if they don't even know me?

It's like having Heidi's heart, out of her body, walking around without her. Then having someone catch sight of this naked, pink, cute little heart wandering around. Taking interest in it and proceed to have a conversation with it.
Yes that's what it feels like.

So what's the point of this post? Well, it is to say this. THANK YOU SO MUCH. MUAH MUAH MUAH. For coming to my blog to read the same post 11 thousand times even though there's nothing new. For feeling interested enough to come see what the hell is going on in Heidi's life, and perhaps blackmail her with them someday. Heh.
Well blackmail on!

Clothes Maketh The Man.

Today, my father wore a new shirt. It's a polo tee from Baleno. So what's the big deal? Well, the thing is, he's always wearing the same colours, dark blue, grey or black polo tees. Today's shirt is different. It has 2 colours and that's a miracle! Furthermore, the two colours are green and yellow, just like a sunny island at a beach with a little palm tree. Oh sorry, I meant the colour scheme.

My father asked me if he looked nice. I glanced at him. Besides the spare tire(the shirt was quite tight), he looked different!
"Yes, you look different from the usual kopitiam ah pek." I replied, fixated on my Maplestory.
He walked past me, then ask again "Hao kan ma?" (Does it look nice?)
"Yah, you no longer look like those coffeeshop ah peks."
He put on his socks. "Hao kan ma?"
"Yes."
He stood up and examined his shirt. "Hao kan ma?"
"YES, YAH I SAID YES ALREADY! YOU LOOK DIFFERENT!"

I had to repeat "Yes" several times before he managed to be shooed out of the house.
Man.

Oh Thou Unworthy One.

"If you do not breathe through writing, if you do not cry out in writing, or sing in writing, then don't write, because our culture has no use for it."


I must admit, writing's obviously not a passion of mine, since I fufill none of the criteria above. Thus by Anais Nin's perspective, I shouldn't write at all. I think a part of me knows that, judging by the frequency of my postings. However, if I do not write, my fingers will grow lax and fat. Writing's the reason why they are slim and tapered and...short.

On the basis of keeping my fingers trim and fit, I shall continue to write. So, just to make sure our culture has a use for my writing, I'm going sing through it. Doe a deer, a female deer, ray a drop of golden sun...