it all starts from 1

I reckon I stay at home a little too much nowadays. life has been quite the same everyday, just me and the teevee (which I am very much glued to). human contact had been minimal and that is not very good for the talkative me.

you know, when you are very much alone at home, you start to think about things. to be more specific, you start to recall the past and basically sink into that whole reservoir of memories. apart from that, you also think about things that did not happen in reality but what you would have wanted it to be. combining the two kinds just brings ME to a very bad shape emo girl. :(

friends, in general, forms majority of my memories. I just thought that it would have been fun if certain days of my life can be re-lived so that I can taste happiness once again. but 景物依旧, 人事已非 (same setting but with different stories in the making). sometimes it is just not quite easy to backtrack those days where I didn't know any friends and all I had was daddy, mummy and kor kor.

emo elmo! (>.<)

Lovely Bones

this film is indeed special. it portrayed 'the story of a life and everything that came after'. it was about a murder and the way people accepted the lost. most importantly it pointed out that we can only be freed from ourselves when we know how to let go.

but how easy is it to let go?

next

a week since I came back to this hectic city. honestly, life has not been too hard for me (too relaxing in fact). it is just that everyday I wake up facing a whole series of unknown which has no answers to it. it is not the fact that I am not satisfied with the current relaxed life, but the fact that I am just lazy to move on.

one of the reasons I tell myself to live a peaceful life of just attending Japanese class is that I have another one-week trip in November which stalls all the time before that. I wish that life stops at this point in time but it didn't pause at all. so everyday I think of what I can do and just convince myself that the job-searching shall start after I really get ready to work.

this does not seem to calm myself down, but I don't know what's the rush. whatever is the next phase of my life seem to be so interesting but I am just not ready to proceed on.