Sunday, September 03, 2017

Celia's Birth: Part 3 of 3 . . . Induction, Labor, Birth and Baby!

Wednesday, September 23, 2015 – I was ready to have a baby! Xan came over after Stella went to school and picked up the boys even though I wasn't going to need help until much, much later. I'm grateful she did though, because it gave me a chance to wind down and relax and take care of some last minute baby things. I was really supposed to take a nap, and I really had good intentions, but that didn't happen. If I would have known what was coming, I would have definitely forced that nap.

Kat, who was with me for both Malcolm's and Quentin's births, arrived just after 4:00 and was helping arrange supplies where they needed to be while we chatted before Alison came. I called Elliot, who was just sitting down to dinner with some clients that were in from out of town, and asked him to come home because Mama was ready to have a baby and I knew he wanted to be there for the entire process. Elliot got home around 5:00 and we finished some clean up and furniture moving upstairs in the loft where we were planning on setting up the pool. I had already put out the tarps and had my bins of birth supplies ready as well as all of my stuff I wanted near me after the birth. The pool we used was borrowed from the birth center and I'm sure it's the same one I used for Malcolm and Quentin (we always use a liner, of course, so don't get grossed out). I filled it with as much air as I could with the pump and then Elliot helped with the rest.

Alison texted me around 5:00 to say that she was in traffic from Phoenix, but that she was close. I guess I was expecting another assistant, as we'd had with the other births, but when Alison showed up, she told me it'd just be them. I'm so good at this that I could really do it myself, but having my Alison and Kat and ESPECIALLY my Elliot here was all I needed.

We went right upstairs to my room to check Baby vitals and position first and then break my bag of waters at 5:30. All was good with the fluid and easy contractions continued as they had been normally for the last several weeks. Not much, but still something. I got up and walked around, up and down the stairs, and continued to prepare things. Elliot and I started watching Castle and I leaned over the ball and ottoman and continued to walk around. I had a few good contractions as I walked, but nothing that lasted. What we should have done was eat dinner. Neither of us had eaten (because I called him away from his dinner), and I was so excited to get started that I just forgot. After a few episodes, we decided to take a walk around 9:00ish because that's what threw me into active labor last time with Quentin. We walked over on Orchard still on our side of the neighborhood and almost all the way down Summerfield to Elliot, but then I felt like I had to pee, so we turned around and came back home. I should have peed and gone back out for more walking, but it was still kind of hot outside.

We continued to watch a show. Either Kat or Alison checked baby's heartbeat every 30 minutes and my blood pressure every hour. Other than that, they completely left us alone. In fact, Alison sprawled on the couch in the front room asleep and was snoring. She'd already had a full day at the birth center as well as her conference in Phoenix, so I couldn't blame her. She came into the kitchen only once when I stopped to lean over the counter and sway my hips during a good contraction. This tells me that she was listening to me even though she was asleep.
She's amazing. Then I told her that I wanted to go to bed. I hadn't taken a nap that day and it really didn't look like much was happening after 6 hours, so I thought we'd go sleep. She mentioned that it was a great idea and that sometimes getting that rest can speed things along.

Elliot and I went upstairs, brushed our teeth, said our prayers, and I hopped up on the bed laying with my head at the foot of the bed to be closer to the ceiling fan. Elliot climbed into the recliner. It was midnight. Thirty seconds later, I had to groan through a contraction. It was a good one. Maybe two minutes later another one hit and I decided that I wasn't going to lay down through those. I got up and leaned over the bed to sway my hips and after a couple more in just a few minutes, I decided that Elliot needed to start filling the pool because I needed to get in!

It's not exactly a small pool. It takes time to get it filled with a tiny hose. I continued to breathe through the contractions and changed into my swimming suit top to be ready for the water. By 1:00, I was able to step in and find some relief. I was vocalizing through the contractions and allowing myself to focus all of my energy on relaxing every muscle in my body to allow the softening I needed for that baby to come out. Once again, I tried to get into different positions in the water, but I naturally wanted to be sitting down. This is an incredibly difficult position for Elliot to be helpful. I'm leaned so far back and into the water that he can't access my shoulders or lower back to rub. He just has my head. Plus, I'm not sure why neither of us thought to get him a more comfortable chair to sit on besides the stool! He was on that thing for a long time!

We had rearranged the couches up in the loft to open the room and allow space for the pool. One of the couches was right behind me and that's where Alison put herself. She fell asleep almost immediately and was lightly snoring. However, her light snoring was distracting, so I continued to vocalize even after my contractions were done because my moaning was a more relaxing sound than someone snoring behind me.

Time goes away when I'm laboring. I really have no clue what time it is and I really have no desire to know. After a while, Elliot had to get up and I saw him standing on the stairs still within eyesight. I knew he was tired too and I honestly didn't know how long anything had been happening besides the fact that I knew it was definitely taking longer than our other births had.

Finally, my body started pushing. For a lot of women, this is remembered as the hardest and most painful part of birth, but I truly love this sensation! It's the shortest part of birth and means that the baby will be in my arms very, very soon! It's a definite difference from just contracting and even my vocalization changes. And that's when Alison wakes up. I truly do love that woman. Yes, she was sleeping and yes, she was snoring, but she was aware of me the entire time as well. She knows when it's time to jump in, but also knows how far to jump in with me.

Suddenly, Elliot's fitbit beeped with his regular 5:00 morning alarm right in my ear. NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!  Now I knew what time it was! I didn't want to know! Take it back! Elliot started to say something, but I cut him off (at the time, I thought I said it nicely) and said, "Don't say it! Don't say it!" Whatever he was or was not going to say, I didn't want him to acknowledge that it was now 5:00 in the morning or else I would get distracted with figuring out how long it was taking. They obliged. No one said anything.

The next thing I did hear, however, was Alison who I now noticed was in front of me outside the pool just right next to Kat. She said very quietly, "Elliot, do you have any duct tape?"

Ok, I don't know about you, but we're hoping things will OPEN here, not get taped shut! Am I right? Anyway, I'm not even sure Elliot and I have used any duct tape at this house, so he didn't know. He left my side to go into the garage to find it, which he did, and came back to give it to Alison and Kat who were desperately trying to hold the pool together so the air wouldn't come out. All I heard was the screech of duct tape being stretched out and my 3 helpers fruitlessly mending the hissing pool. Hummm, was I slowly leaning further backwards?

Next thing I heard was Alison, who said, "Whitney, you're going to have to get out of the pool."

I'm in the midst of pushing my baby out, mind you. In my head, I said absolutely not. She said it again and explained quickly that the air was not going to stay in the pool and that we needed to move to the bathroom into my bathtub that she was already filling with fresh, warm water. That sounded nice, but it was just . . . so . . . far . . . away! I moved to my hands and knees to ready myself to get out of the pool . . . while my body is actively pushing. My contractions were lasting a 30 seconds every minute and they were good ones, which means that I had barely 30 seconds of rest before the next one started. I stood to get out of the pool, but I had waited too long to stand before the next one started. I finished that contraction and stood and stepped out of the pool just as the next one started again.

I leaned against Alison and hugged her as she held me up. She said, "Just as this one starts to end, we are going to book it over to the bathroom." I was so irritated with myself as the only thing I could think to say was, "I can't!" What? That's dumb! Of course, I can! I was mad at myself in that very moment for saying such a ridiculous thing, but Alison beat me to it by saying, "Yes, you can and you will!" And she was right. Right as soon as that contraction started to end, she pulled me through my room and into the bathroom with such purpose that I'm still surprised at how quickly I got there. I stepped into the bathtub with relief and resumed my position as the next contraction hit with a vengeance.

Kat moved all of the necessary items into the bathroom for the birth, but Alison and Elliot were no where to be found . . . not that I was looking for them. They were actually feverishly emptying the pool of water with the pump before all of the air came out of it and all of the water flooded our entire house. Yes, I hadn't given birth yet, but still . . . you don't want that or any water all over the house.

I kind of sing while I'm pushing. I've never done a video of me in labor, but I do wish I could hear it while I'm not in the moment. Singing helps me not hold my breath (holding your breath makes you tense) and it's kind of fun to have a little vibrato after doing something hard. I was still doing my thing when I finally heard Alison and Elliot come into our tiny bathroom. Alison told Kat to turn off the fan (What? Really? It's stifling in here!) because she didn't want it to blow on baby when she came out. She also told Elliot to grab the camera. I thought that was funny that she asked that because I was just preparing myself to go for another length of time in labor. Just as I thought that, Baby's head popped out. I was shocked and SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO happy!

I really and truly had no idea how long this was taking and even though I knew I was pushing, I really wasn't expecting her to come out right then! I was so excited that it gave me an added strength to continue pushing and I had really decided that I was going to help this time! I wanted that baby in my arms STAT now that I knew it was so close! Alison got all down in my business and told me to push with the next contraction, which I did with a lame attempt. Kat told me to put my chin down to my chest and somehow that really did make me push better.

The next second, Baby came out and Alison and I grabbed her to pull her to my chest. I saw that beautiful face and I started crying with abandon, saying, "She's beautiful! She is so beautiful! I love her! Elliot, she's so beautiful!" And then I couldn't stop crying. Really, I couldn't stop. I'd look at her, I'd cry. I'd think of what just happened to get her into my arms, and I'd cry. I'd think of the fact that I was actually looking at her and holding her, and I'd cry. I couldn't stop. She truly was beautiful!

Celia Kent Dibble was born at 5:38 a.m. on Thursday, September 24, 2015, almost 6 hours after active labor started . . . 12 hours after induction (just a bit longer than the boys births). The sun was up and we were ready for some sleep, but had a gorgeous little baby to snuggle instead.

I do love the first moments of holding my brand new baby and this was no different. She was precious and I just snuggled and looked at her and kissed her . . . and cried. Her umbilical cord finally stopped pulsing after about 30-ish minutes (which seemed long), so they clamped it and Elliot cut it. We rewrapped her in a new warm towel and I handed her over for Elliot to snuggle for a bit. I still had some work to do. I had been having more contractions while I was holding Baby Celia and hoped the placenta would come out right after I handed her over, but it was stubborn. Policy is that if the placenta isn't delivered within one hour after baby is delivered, that mommy needs to go to the hospital to deliver it. I was NOT going to do that. No way! About 45 minutes after Celia was born, I gave Alison permission to give me a shot of pitocin to increase the intensity of the contractions to see if we could get that thing out. I changed positions (still in the bathtub) and did a bit of pushing, but it wasn't coming out. Alison suggested that I go get on the bed to see if movement and a new position would do anything. Time was nearly up on our hour, but she could also tell it was super close, so I wasn't going anywhere. I know the dangers of traction (pulling on the cord) and I'm usually totally against it, but Alison said she was going to use some gentle traction since she knew it was seconds away from coming out. And there you go, it came right out with zero minutes to spare. Phew! I cried again.


I went back to the shower to get clean and then was back in bed reaching for my baby in no time! I am not sure when we started calling or texting people, but I was expecting Stella at any moment. She spent the night at the Pratt's and it was picture day at school, so I'm grateful that she was with someone who knows how to do cute hair! When she did finally show up, she was the 3rd person (as promised) to hold her baby sister and she was in love. Stella has always been so tender and emotional when her siblings have been born and it is a blessing to witness her love for them as she has prayed for each one to be in our home.
Alison had forgotten her scale, so she did the newborn screening without the weight, but we were guessing around 8 pounds. Celia was healthy and chubby and perfect! Alison and Kat left us (promising to return later that day with the scale), and Stella left for school. I fed Baby Celia and we all closed our eyes for a few hours before we started receiving visitors. Xan brought Malcolm and Quentin over while I was still sleeping, so Elliot showed Baby Celia to them while I continued sleeping for a bit. My parents came, several friends, Adam and the kids, and even our bishop and his wife came to visit. I felt good and energetic even after just a few hours of sleep! I know Elliot was super tired though, so we were happy for some rest that evening.

When Alison came back later with the scale, we learned that Miss Celia weighed 8 pounds 9 ounces (that's how much I weighed when I was born)! Perfect little thing! I also learned that she was born with her left hand up by her face (nuchal hand), which is why it took a little bit longer for her to be born. I mean, if you think about it, even a little arm takes up space in what isn't very much space in the first place!   No wonder she took her time!

Oh, each birth is different and for me, it seems to get just a little bit longer each time, but the result is a perfect little person, a miracle for our family that we adore and cherish each time! We are so blessed and we are grateful for the opportunity to be in the midst of such miracles!

Celia's Birth: Part 2 of 3 . . . Pregnancy, Midwife, and Scheduling Birthday!

This pregnancy was different.  I'm sure it's because of my lack of being in shape to begin with, but this one really smacked me in the face.  Pregnancy is amazing and a miracle, but if you can avoid it in the scorching hot middle of the summer, I would advise this.  I pretty much sat in front of a fan, napped, and went to the chiropractor during the last 3 months of pregnancy.  I certainly wasn't sleeping during the night and my usual peppy attitude was missing for most of the summer.  I do love being pregnant and I am willing to be pregnant for as long as the baby needs, but I had a glimpse into what other women feel in the last days of pregnancy irrational thinking of not being able to make it another day!  I was definitely ready for her to be not in my belly.

My midwife, Alison Haasch, started a beautiful new birth center in Gilbert called Birth Haven back in 2013 (after I had Quentin).  She hired several other midwives as well as a naturopathic doctor and handed over the home birth responsibilities to one of them while she took care of most of the birth center births.  However, since I was a "frequent flyer" (she was with me for Malcolm and Quentin), she decided that she wanted to be at my next birth as well.  I was perfectly prepared to go to 42 weeks (actually 41 weeks, 6 days . . . stupid policies), but as I passed 40 weeks, I found myself asking what her favorite day was to help women give birth and that we should schedule an induction during the 41st week.

I was remembering my experiences with Malcolm's and Quentin's pregnancies and had already decided not to repeat the frustration and fear everyone tries to throw at me during the last days/weeks of my pregnancies.  I had my weekly visits with Alison and baby girl was doing great.  I can say that I never get checked for dilation because I don't need to.  Some people like to know the progress, I don't.  When my midwife tells me by feeling my belly that my baby is not engaged in my pelvis, there's no use in dropping my drawers, so its not going to happen.  She always gives me the option and I always refuse.  I like to think that I'm making progress whether I know it or not.  Besides, whether I'm 1 cm dilated or 5 cm when she checks me, I could still be that for weeks without another change or the baby could be born in 30 minutes.  You never know, so I'd rather not assume what might happen.

Her official due date was September 14th, but I knew we'd be safe at least a week later.  I didn't want to be sitting around doing nothing and waiting impatiently for Baby to be born, so I scheduled things into my calendar like it was any normal week.  In fact, I probably scheduled more things so I'd be up and about.

Friday, September 18, 2015 – With my last two pregnancies, I scheduled my reflexology appointments on the day I was induced, so I tried to get that one in earlier to see if I could get some good progress with that, since my reflexologist is known for helping the labor start/progress.  I adore people who will rub my feet.  It is so relaxing and I never want it to end.  I'm sure I fell asleep because it went too fast and I also caught myself snoring.  Even though I was relaxing the entire time, Lenor had me sit still for a few more minutes before I got up.  Right as soon as I moved to get out of the chair, I had an awesome contraction that had me leaning over the ottoman and demanding concentration.  She's a miracle worker.  However, it ended with a few more contractions and with the return of my sweet kids after school.  I also had my 40 week appointment (kind of late, but that's all I could do that week) and everything was perfect.

Monday, September 21, 2015 – Today ended up being a busy day.  I had a chiropractor appointment, my 41 week appointment with Alison, dentist appointments for all of the kids after school, and a phone meeting with my Advisor from BYU-I scheduled throughout the day.  Chiropractor and Midwife were back-to-back.  My chiropractor had been doing some acupuncture on me trying to induce labor since 38 weeks, but to no avail.  Oh well, I knew I'd have a baby before next Monday, so I wasn't worried about not being in labor.  Uncomfortable and ready, but not worried.  At my midwife visit, Alison's assistant had a harder time finding Baby's heartbeat and when she finally did, she said it was just barely under her perfect range.  She had me change positions and Alison did an ultrasound with her ancient machine and found her heartbeat just fine and plenty of movement.  Then she checked with the doppler again and it was within range.  She attributed it to position and the fact that I had just gone to the chiropractor and had been laying down for a while, but (and I understand she has to cover her rear), she referred me to get a Biophysical Profile and Stress Test done.  UGH! That's exactly what I didn't want!  I knew everything was fine.  I did.  The only stress I was feeling was that she had to refer me!

So I went home and cried.  I usually try to be in a constant state of hypnosis and relaxation, especially during the last weeks, but this damaged my calm.  I called Elliot and cried at him and voiced my frustrations.  I prayed.  I felt fine.  I knew my baby was fine.  She was kicking and all was normal.  So Elliot said to make the appointment if I wanted and see how we felt in the morning.  I made the appointment at Phoenix Perinatal Associates, but the next appointment they had wasn't for a couple of days.  Fine with me.

Phoenix Perinatal Associates called later in the afternoon and said my insurance wouldn't cover the visit.  Well, that was easy!  I definitely wasn't going to get a test I knew I didn't need AND pay for it myself!  So, of course, I cancelled the appointment.  I texted Alison and told her what happened and she asked me to check with Valley Perinatal.  I called and made an appointment for the next day and asked Alison to send the referral.  I also not jokingly said, ". . . or I could just have her tonight."

Her text response was, "After low-ish heart tones, I'd like reassurance of her safety before stressing her with labor.  If labor starts on its own, we'll roll with it, but I don't want to intentionally cause anything."

I asked what the biophysical profile would tell us.  She said, "It looks at placenta function, fluid levels, if the baby is moving/practice breathing/has strong muscle tone.  All things that correlate with fetal health."

I said, "She's been rolling from side to side all day and she's kicking right now.  Maybe she's like her mother and she's just not a morning person."

Alison likes me.  She said, "Lol, could be!"

I added, "So what would they tell you that would change our course of action for induction?"

She said, "If she is not showing good signs of health, we would have to look at what risks present themselves.  In all likelihood, it was positional and won't repeat itself, but I don't gamble with babies."

I just wanted to be sure because I needed to know how futile my objection was, so I asked, "Just wondering . . . would you still induce me if I don't go get the ultrasound?"

She said, "If her kick counts stay good, yes I will."

Well, hip-hip-hooray!  I said, "What's a good kick count? I guess I should have counted to see what was normal for her."

Alison said, "Yeah, that would be helpful.  We want 10 movements in under 30 minutes during her active times."

Baby happened to be active at that time as if she was reading my texts with me, so I started charting her movements right then.  It was ridiculous to continue charting each movement because she moved 10 times within minutes and continued to move like that for hours.  I continued to count at least 10 movements throughout the night even though that wasn't necessarily her active time, but this baby was doing a jig and I knew for sure she was telling me that everything was fine and not to worry anymore.  I knew her and I knew my body.  We're good.

Tuesday, September 22, 2015 – The next morning I had forgotten that I already had Malcolm's pre-school screening scheduled and had to change the ultrasound appointment.  I can't even remember what I changed it to because it was several days away and I knew I wasn't going to be pregnant then anyway.  I took Malcolm to his pre-school screening over at Mesquite Elementary School.  No one knows what to say when I tell them (after they ask, of course) that I was due last Monday.  Funny to watch reactions though.

Since Mesquite Elementary School is just about 3 miles away from Alison's office, I texted and asked if I could come back in to hear Baby's heartbeat again.  Of course, she said yes.  And of course, Baby's heartbeat was perfectly normal today.  With the charted movements and perfect heartbeat, we made the plan to induce me on Wednesday late afternoon because Alison had a lecture at a conference somewhere in Phoenix earlier that afternoon.

I made arrangements for the little boys to stay at Adam and Xan's and Stella would be able to stay at the Pratt's since they were in the neighborhood and could take her to school and fix her hair for picture day on Thursday morning if labor went through the night . . . and Stella desperately wanted to be the first to hold her baby sister.  I was fine with her being 3rd on the list.  So all I had to do now was wait a little bit longer.  Easy.

Elliot had figured out that the ancestor (Celia Kent Dibble) that we were naming our baby after was born 212 years ago on September 24th.  He kept saying how awesome it would be if she was born on that same day.  I was being induced on the 23rd and I thought that was close enough . . .

Celia's Birth: Part 1 of 3 . . . It's positive, it's a GIRL, and she has a name!

It was back to the regular routine after a fun Christmas break, Elliot off to work and Stella back to school in the brand new year of 2015.  My internal pregnancy sensor had been activated a few days before when I noticed I wanted to take naps right after I woke up in the morning.  I wasn't sleeping well, my legs were jumpy, and the bathroom frequency had increased suspiciously.  I had had a few "I think I might be" days in the previous months, so I had a stock of Dollar store tests just waiting to be used.  So I did it.  I took the test.  Then I started laughing when the 2 pink lines showed up immediately.  I love those pink lines.  They cause such an array of emotions.  Almost immediately I dread finishing up on the potty, just knowing that for the next several weeks/months I will be afraid to go to the bathroom because of the possibility of miscarriage, but also a feeling of joy as I immediately plan for the future and seeing that sweet baby for the first time!
I put the boys in the car and headed to Elliot's work to give him the good news.  When I got to his work, I called him and told him that we were in the area if he wanted to come out and see us.  When he go to the car, I asked him if he forgot something this morning and when he said he didn't, I picked up the pregnancy test and showed him.  Elliot gave me a big kiss and was so excited (probably because it hadn't sunk in yet)!  He also said he had his suspicions when I showed up at his work 20 minutes after he did that something like this was going on!

So I got right on the phone with my midwife to get a prescription for progesterone which is the hormone that sustains a pregnancy, at least my pregnancies.  Of course, my next step was to take a selfie with my positive pregnancy test. And then the rest of the day was just me walking around aimlessly smiling and figuring out a due date and how we'll tell everyone.

I'm not sure what kind of perception people have of us until I tell them that we're having another baby.  Some are super excited and some give me a look like Elliot's just been called as bishop again and don't know how we'll ever be able to handle another child.  Whatever the response, Elliot and I and definitely the kids were super excited to be welcoming a new baby into our family!

I had an ultrasound scheduled at the beginning of April, but postponed it due to a business trip that Elliot had scheduled.  I really wanted him there, so I decided that I could wait another 2 weeks for the next appointment.  Stella joined us at the ultrasound (as she had for the boys), and had so many questions and we were all anxious to find out if it was a boy or a girl (I already knew).  I'm going to venture to say that our ultrasound technician was having a rotten day because she was super short with Stella and non-communicative.  Unless you're a technician, you really don't know what you're looking at, so I would also suggest that if you've even glanced at my chart, you'd better just go straight to the sweet little thing's heart and tell me that it's beating.  Ok? Ok then.  Long story short, at least about the ultrasound, the last bit of information she gave us was that we were having a GIRL!
By the beginning of June, we had agreed on a name for our Baby Girl, almost exactly as we had figured out Stella's name before we were even pregnant with her.  I had been visiting family in Idaho and Utah, when we stopped in to visit Uncle Cleve and Aunt Barbara at the Dibble Farm in Layton.  They have a bunch of family history photos on display on their walls, and I look at them every single time.  My eye kept catching the name Celia, which was captioned under one of the photos.  I didn't say anything, but we headed over to the airport to pick up Elliot who would drive us all back home to Arizona and  on the way, miraculously, Elliot said, "What about Celia?"  WHAT?!  That is the craziest and most providential thing!  So I suggested, since the ancestor's name was actually Celia Kent Dibble, that that was exactly what we should name her . . . after her female ancestor and after her grandpa Kent.  Baby named, check!

Saturday, February 04, 2017

Abilities vs. Tasks

"Do not pray for tasks equal to your abilities,
but pray for abilities equal to your tasks.
Then the performance of your tasks
will be no miracle,
but you will be the miracle."
Thomas S. Monson
September 29, 2007