" ? ???'? ??? ?? "

I Don't get it.

I so strongly believe that everything happens for a reason. Weather you may be a Christian or just a believer in a higher power, I know that both sides tend to believe this as well.

But then there are also those that believe in randomness. This is all fine with me. 

I am a Christian. I believe that God has a purpose and a plan for me. I also have learned that I can't always figure out where or why he is guiding me. Most of the time I try not to figure this out as I just prefer to leave my troubles to him.

Then there are the other times that I try to analyze every little thing that I am going through and why God is sending me down a particular path. This I know is futile but none the less I find myself doing so.

Case in point: Today.

I am supposed to be resting, per doctors orders. I feel good but I am, for the most part, feeling exhausted. So I rest. I do a little and I rest.

My pug hasn't been feeling well. She has Doggy IBS. So first thing this morning I had a few messes to clean up. 

I had planned on just resting until my doctors appointment at 3:30 this afternoon. 

You do know never to use the word "Plan" if you are a Christian. That word makes God laugh. He has a wonderful sense of humor. Did you know that?

The phone calls started in the late morning. There were tax problems at the Church. I made a few calls, got things straightened out, then had to go to Church to do the actual physical straightening. The computer work.

It's all good as this isn't physically taxing.

Get it? Physically taxing. Your supposed to laugh there. Anyway the bookkeeper, treasurer and I got it all straightened out, I think.

I was there almost two hours then had to leave for my doctors appointment. Another follow up visit. 

I guess I'll start with the waiting room. Please don't judge me here people. I'm tired. Thanks. 

My appointment was for 3:30. I arrived at 3:20. As I sat reading a year old issue of

" Good Housekeeping ", which by the way, is my favorite magazine of all time, the people started to roll in.

I observed many different characters to be sure but the one that really struck, bewildered and annoyed me was a very old man who I assumed was accompanied by his daughter who had a good ten years on me. I guesstimated his age to be around 90.

I love old people. I always wanted to be a geriatric nurse. It was my dream. But I tell you, this man irritated me to no end.

He had the most annoying ticks. He constantly smacked his lips, over and over. In between which he would be moaning and sighing.

I texted to my husband, as I waited two hours just to get into the exam room, that I was sitting next to a very annoying old man. Did I mention that he smelled badly as well?

Now remember I said, please don't judge me. I thought about all of the things that he may have went through in his life. Upon close examination, I supposed that he was probably quite handsome in his day. And he must have been a nice man at one time, even though he complained to his companion the whole time about the wait.

I was irritated with the wait and I was there longer than he was. 

I no longer could focus on my "Good Housekeeping " so I texted to my husband that I was still waiting (1.5 hours now) and was sitting next to a very irritating old man.

He texted me back. " Get up and go to the bathroom and then change seats.".

I don't know what happened next. I guess I was slap happy. I was all alone waiting and one of my biggest nightmares happened.

I was overcome by one of my infamous, hysterical laughing fits! Right there in the waiting room while approximetly 15 other people were waiting.

I'm talking roll on the floor, shoulders shaking, tears flowing, laughing fit.

How embarrassing. 

I fought mightily to control myself. I kept looking at my phone as if someone had texted something really funny. Damn funny.

I truly hope that I didn't offend anyone. I am thinking that God was playing a joke on me for my thoughts. You don't want to know my thoughts.

I felt badly for my unladylike outburst.

It wasn't much longer after I gained control before I was called into the exam room. I do believe that I moved rather quickly to get in there.

After about another 30 minutes of waiting, I finally got to see the surgeon. As usual, she was very caring and patient. 

I am doing well but there is some scar tissue in my neck. I have to go for another doppler test tomorrow. I'm still not allowed to exercise or do strenuous housework for at least a month. 

I can do a little but am supposed to keep resting...

Sitting on my butt for another MONTH !!!!!

Good Lord. 

I guess the jokes on me.  

" Monday, Monday "

" Monday Monday... can't trust that day. "

Does anyone remember that song by The MaMa's and PaPa's ?

I always loved that song even though I actually like Monday's.

Everyone leaves, which is a bit sad but I usually throw myself into housework and we all know how much I love housework. I do really. I'm not being sarcastic here. There are some of us who just enjoy it.

I have been mostly sitting per my doctors orders. Although I did do quite a bit yesterday. I made a pot of beef, vegetable and pasta soup. Also washed some lettuce for a salad. I'm still pretty tired most of the day which I was warned about but for the most part, I'm feeling much better.

According to our local weatherman, it's supposed to be sixty degrees today. Weird but nice. Our winter has been very mild so far this year and that's just fine with me.

I have another follow up visit with my surgeon tomorrow and I am hoping for an o.k. to do more. Maybe start riding my bike again. I'd also like to clean the inside of my car since it's supposed to be so mild this week.

I will be going to church today. There are some things that need to be done in the office. I'll have to go back again later in the week but that's fine. It's a good excuse to get out.

I made my Daughter-in-Law a pair of fingerless gloves last week in a soft gray yarn. They fit her tiny hands perfectly. Two of her friends saw them and want a pair as well. I whipped up a black pair for one of her friends over the weekend. I'm charging $ 15.00 a pair. I've seen similar pairs online selling for up to $ 45.00 so I think $15.00 is a bargain. I took a photo of one of the gloves below. I could only get one hand as I needed the other for the camera!!

Now I know what your thinking. I should sell them online. It's a great idea but I wouldn't be able to keep up with orders due to Carpel Tunnel and Arthritis in my hands. I can only do so much and then I have to quit for a few days. Katie's friend came over last week and said there are boys at school that want them too. I told her that I'd need to be paid up front for their orders.

So I doubt that will happen!! But it has given me something to do while sitting here. I want to make a pair for my daughter Ginny next. I know that she would love them.

My lamp that I use to crochet has bit the dust. So I will use the profit to buy a new one. I have borrowed Kate's lamp for the time being. Working with black yarn is especially hard on the eyes!

I've been wanting to post all weekend but really haven't had much to post about. Just trying to heal so that I can get back to my life again.

I hope that everyone had a good weekend and a good Monday!!

" I'm Stuck ! "

I am stuck. I have been playing Angry Birds during my recovery. I played it after my knee surgery as well. Those sleepless nights. There were quite a few of those then.

So here I sit once again playing this game which I think I enjoy. Although at times it can get frustrating. But it helps keep ones mind off of other stuff.

I've also been crocheting a lot this past week. I've made myself a pair of fingerless gloves to wear around the house. My hands and feet are always cold. So I made something for myself, which is rare.

Katie didn't want a pair but when her BF, Natasha saw them, well I had to make another pair. She has this Gray and Black sweater that she likes to wear so I made her a Gray and Black pair.

I think she likes them !

I have been a very good girl during my recovery. Today was the first day that I woke feeling good and not so tired. I went for my follow up visit today also. Things are going well and I have to go back next week.

The doctor said that I could work at church as long as I didn't feel too tired. As for house cleaning, not for a few weeks.

I couldn't decide weather or not to post this photo. And believe it or not, I look way better than I did a few days ago. My whole neck was swollen then and dark purple and red. Pretty colors!

But it's much better now. If I put a scarf around my neck, no one can tell. So there I am folks in all of my beautiful glory!!

The real me. Well at least for now. I'm sure it will look better everyday. 

Now, back to that Angry Birds game....

" Hi Folks, I'm Home "

I made it home yesterday, gosh I don't even remember what time it was now. I know it was in the afternoon and I know that every noise was really getting on my nerves!

I went up to bed very early and angry. Katie's friends were over as they were all going to church last night, and the noise was just too much for me.

I am very swollen and bruised. Not much pain though but a bit of soreness. I was finally able to get some sleep last night. Didn't get but maybe three hours in the hospital.

The surgeon got the plaque filled section of artery from my neck. So once healed things should be better.

For now I am really tired as she said I would be so I intend on just taking it easy for the rest of the week. I have a follow up appointment for Tuesday next week.

I'm not sure when I'll be back here, just wanted to let everyone know that I'm home and alright just tired and sore.

Thank you to everyone for your prayers and well wishes.

Have a great weekend!

Love Di ♥

its been a long day

       It started with the hospital running behind.

so are 10:00 am start time ended up being a 2:00 pm start time.

Then the 2 hour surgery took 3 hours so that is why im posting this so late. Oh I forgot you guys wanted to know how my wife is doing.

Tune in tomorrow just kidding.

Everything thing went just fine she will be home tomorrow afternoon.

A little sore but just as good as new.So if i didn't mess this up you will all know how she is and if I did mess up you'll have to wait till tomorrow.

Thanks for all the love and friendship you have given to Di 

Jake

" Pre-op Jitters "

Hi folks, this is somewhat of a test post. I am showing my husband how to post on my blog so that he can let you know how the surgery goes tomorrow.

Was I surprised to see that when you use Google Chrome, posting is completely different so this is an experiment for me as well!

I am feeling a bit anxious today, understandably. I went for my pre-op visit today and I guess that's when the nerves settled in.

But for now I am doing fine and hope to be back visiting all of my friends soon.

Be nice to my husband please. He's never done this before!!

Love To all of you.

Love Di ♥

" Change "

We all know that " Change " is inevitable. Or at least we should. 

I believe that once we accept " Change " as a part of life things often go smoother.

There is a saying that I have always tried to remember during times of "Change". I don't know who said it but I have always felt that it was very true and it goes something like this, 

" The only constant in life is change."

I may not have that word for word but it's close enough for you to get it. I have always prided myself in the way that I deal with "Change". Probably better than others do but in reality I often times find myself kicking and screaming over certain changes.

Things today seem to change at lightening speed. Or could it be that the older we get, things seem to change at lightening speed? That is a question that I cannot answer with full knowledge.

Anyone over Fifty can tell you that the world has changed drastically since we were children. I think that we Baby boomers have adapted quite well. And most of my friends sincerely seem to try to keep up with these changes.

I have noticed that women seem to deal better with change. I'm not trying to offend my male friends here but if you study how women and men react to change, I think you'll notice that men seem to go off on tirades when there are changes in their lives.

I wonder why that is? The ability to adapt to change may not be easy or pleasurable but it is certainly a necessity if we are to survive and function with confidence in the days ahead.

Adapting to change can be frustrating to say the least. Example: I had to change to Google Chrome from Firefox because I wasn't able to comment on some other Blogs.

I have tried Google Chrome twice and didn't care for it except for the fact that it enabled me to play Angry Birds.  I am by NO means a game player but while recovering from knee surgery in August, I found this game to be a pleasant distraction.  

This was a change that I did not want to make but sometimes, like it or not, we must except change.

Change can be a good thing and a bad thing. If things aren't going your way, you can almost be sure that they will change for the better eventually. Likewise, when things are going well, you can also be sure that something will eventually happen that may not be so happy.

So I guess the best thing to do is to learn to except change, maybe not necessarily willingly but most definitely with the understanding that it is inevitable and perhaps with a bit of grace.  

" In a Nutshell "

Alrighty, I went to see the surgeon Thursday. She will be doing the procedure that will unblock my left Carotid Artery. The procedure is called an Endarterectomy. I am so happy that I don't have to say it as I can't, I've tried.

 

 

I will be at the hospital on Tuesday morning at 10:00 a.m. And of coarse no food or drink after midnight previous. This should make for a cranky Diana. I don't deal well with fasting but this will be when I will call on our Lord to help me through. And to help Jake as I will most likely be pretty cranky by then! 

The following is what the procedure will look like only they don't show the shunt in this diagram. The shunt will bypass the clamps to allow continual blood flow to the brain. The artery itself will be clamped off at both ends and then the inner layer of the artery that contains the plaque will then be removed. Once removed the surgeon will stitch it up.

 

 

 

I have to say that I was very impressed by this surgeon. She was very articulate and seemed to answer ALL of my questions BEFORE I even asked them. She has done this many times and said that I wouldn't notice any scar after. When I told her that scars didn't really bother me, she said " They bother me!". 

She also told me that after this surgery, I should never have to worry about a stroke again. I will have to go for an annual Cartorid Doppler to keep an eye on both arteries. Right now the right side is 30 percent blocked but supposedly that isn't bad enough to warrant surgery.

When I asked her why this happened to me, she had a great answer. I told her that I had abused my body in the seventies, always ate whatever I wanted, drank and smoked until the past few years.

She said that there isn't any one answer to that question. Some people are just predisposed to this. It can also be hereditary. That could explain my grandmothers strokes. She was very healthy , never smoked and ate a healthy diet. We never did understand back then why she had them.

I have to say that I was very impressed, in a short period of time, with this doctor. It seemed as though she has done this many times. She was very young. As I told my friend Jackie yesterday on the phone, it makes me feel older when the doctor doesn't look old enough to be one!! But I walked out of her office feeling very confident and relieved. I will take that as a good sign.

I will have to spend the night in the hospital. Since I was there just five months ago, I wasn't too happy about that but it is only overnight. The doctor said that most of her patients complain of very little pain, mostly numbness and swelling. As soon as I can turn my head from side to side, I can drive again. She said I will be very tired for awhile. A week or two, especially since I just had major surgery five months ago.

I wish this hadn't have happened but I am glad that I know now and something can be done about it. The doctor said she would get me back to riding my bike in no time. So this is all good news.

My husband won't be coming home this weekend. He should be home on Monday so he can be with me. My son and Daughter-in-law will be here too. I asked my DIL if she would make me some of that soup she makes with the corn in it for when I come home. She said "What the heck are you talking about?" I said "You know, the soup with the corn and the hamburger or whatever you put in there. I love that stuff." She said "Oh, the succotash soup!". I told her "Whatever it's called, that's what I want!". So I will have something good to heat up after I get home. I've been eating a lot of soups lately.

Which reminds me. I am going to make some Ham and Beans today. I have a lot to do around here before Tuesday. So I bess get busy!!

We'll talk soon O.K.? 

" Bright and Cheerful "

I really wanted to start my second post of the New Year with a "Bright and Cheerful " note. But unfortunately this won't be in the cards for me at this time so I will do my best to make it sound 

"Bright and Cheerful".

Please indulge me.

A week before Christmas I had a TIA or mini stroke. On Christmas Eve I had another one. I am still very happy to be alive and not a vegetable and I am even more excited about having to take more medications.

A week after my visit to the E.R. on Christmas Eve, which really wasn't that bad, The staff was very friendly and helpful, I had an appointment to go and visit my doctor.

I love doctors visits don't you? Really who doesn't? I was so looking forward to telling my doctor about the mini strokes. After all I almost made it two years since the first stroke. I wasn't worried at all!!

At this time, after an examination, my doctor informed me that I was to have a doppler test of my carotid artery as my left one was forty percent blocked two years ago. But the exciting news was that my cholesterol dropped!! What more can a gal ask for?

So I went to the hospital on the 9th, absolutely filled with excitement about my doppler. After about twenty minutes of having a wonderful neck massage, I was able to sit up and leave. It took me about five minutes to get my bearings after sitting up as I was feeling very dizzy. Isn't feeling dizzy fun?

Having heard my doctor tell me that they would call if anything was wrong, imagine my excitement when my phone rang the very next day with my doctors office number showing up on my phone!!

I'll bet they are calling to tell me what a wonderful patient I am!! 

Well not quite. It was my doctors nurse telling me that there was a significant blockage of my left Carotid Artery. Between 80 or 90 percent.  And they were nice enough to make an appointment for me at the surgeons office for tomorrow. 

Wow, this year is starting out bright and cheery. It only took me a few hours to get over the news. That's not bad. And I only have to wait until late tomorrow afternoon to find out what my options are.

Although visiting the SURGEON sort of gives me a clue.

I have been eating like a rabbit but have stopped riding my bike for now. I'm thinking that it may make my head explode. So I will wait and ask the surgeon about that tomorrow.

Am I freaked out or scared? 

Well maybe a little, but I am trying very hard to remain

"Bright and Cheerful"!!! 

I will be back soon to let you know what is going to happen next.

" Facing The Inevitable "

Here it is 2012 already and I still don't feel like Blogging. My mind is just not into it and rightfully so. The end of 2011 brought some scary surprises for me.

 

The week before Christmas I had a TIA ( Transient Ischemic Attack ). In other words another mini stroke. This one was different from the one that I had in 2009. I was talking to Katie's friends and all of a sudden my words didn't sound right. I really didn't know what was going on so I stopped talking and it sort of passed.

 

As the next week went by my arm kept feeling numb on and off. Again, I just ignored it. Then on Christmas Eve at my son's house, just before we were to open the gifts, my talking got all jumbled up again.

You know what you want to say but it just doesn't come out right. Long story short, my husband and son insisted I go to the hospital.

 

Oh joy of joy. I'm being nice here. That wasn't exactly what I was thinking. I was so mad and embarrassed. Yes embarrassed. Everyone was there and I didn't want to leave. I really wasn't in my right mind at the time. Fortunately after having a CT scan seeing that there wasn't any damage, they let me go home with the promise that I would go back on my Plavix. I had stopped taking it some time ago because of the expense but I guess I'm taking it again.

 

So that is how I spent my Christmas. The Kids came over the next day with our gifts that we had brought to there house. This way we at least didn't miss out on some of the gift giving with the grandkids.

I did manage to finish my sons afghan and I think he really did like it.

 

 

 

Here's what it looks like finished.

 

 

My son Frank getting the noisy car working that we bought for Jack!!

Don't get me wrong, I am very grateful that everything turned out alright. But it's a very scary thing to go through. This is the fourth time in three years. The doctors all say that I have thick blood. So it's blood thinners and aspirin for me.

Christmas Day 2011.

I wasn't able to get any other pictures of Christmas. We were all eating loads of wonderful food at my son's house. And then I had to leave but Katie was able to stay. My daughter-in-law brought her home later.

So hopefully you can understand why I haven't wanted to be around much. I have been rearranging my house and my life. I am feeling better now that the Plavix has had time to get through my system. 

My knees are doing great. I've been riding my bike 15 to 20 minutes each day. My goal is 30 minutes a day five to six days a week. By summer I'd like to make it up to an hour.

I go to see my family doctor tomorrow and I'm dreading it. He  doesn't know what happened yet. But I must face the inevitable!!

I sure did miss all of my blog friends and am glad to be back visiting again. I guess the Holidays were just a bit too busy and stressful for me.

I am looking forward to the New Year. I would like a year of good health. Yes, that would be my wish for us all.