argh

Well, I am on vacation. I saw my doctor. No bone chips, but I can't get in to see the physio until November 19th, so I am pretty freaking demoralized about that. :-(

Rocking it like an octogenarian

So last week I was carrying the recycling out and I tripped and fell. I landed on my hip, but put my left arm out (the one not carrying the recycling tub) to help catch me. I was a little sore, but no biggie, right? Except my left shoulder never got better, and has actually gotten worse. So today I broke down and went to the doctor. For x rays and a referral to a physio later, I still don't have any answers, just some good cream and the knowledge that we are working toward getting answers. The x rays are to rule out the possibility of any bone chips. She thinks its probably a torn labrum muscle or tendonitis of the rotator cuff. Who knew you could get tendonitis from a sharp impact? So I will find out. In the meantime, take it easy on the arm and no upper body lifting. UGH.

My Venezia jeans

I wore my size 14 ancient Venezia jeans yesterday and they were very loose. Those jeans are ancient - from the days before they added spandex to jeans, so they have zero stretch. So maybe I'm getting smaller even though I'm not really losing much weight? I dunno.

Here is my weight chart for the last few months:

06/21/19	151.7	-1.7
06/28/19	152.4	0.7
07/05/19	152.5	0.1
07/12/19	151.6	-0.9
07/19/19	149.6	-2.0
07/26/19	151.5	1.9
08/02/19
08/09/19	154.1	2.6
08/16/19	155.2	1.1
08/23/19	153.6	-1.6
08/30/19	153.5	-0.1
09/06/19	153.4	-0.1
09/13/19	151.3	-2.1
09/20/19	152.0	0.7
09/27/19	149.4	-2.6
10/04/19	150.9	1.5
10/11/19	151.0	0.1
10/18/19	150.4	-0.6
10/25/19	149.4	-1.0

So basically 4 months to lose 2 pounds. When I look at it that way, I get really demoralized! Then I think of the stuff that has gone on and the fact that I have maintained my loss - that's pretty good! There are 9 weeks left in the year - I won't get to goal. OTOH, there isn't a finish line, this is my life and I just need to keep making forward progress - including learning how to deal with stress in healthier ways to successfully maintain the weight I have lost.

I'm just feeling 2 minds of the whole thing I guess.

I need to fire my cleaning gal and I hate it but there is also that. :-(  She's the daughter of a friend but it just isn't working out and instead of being a help it's become still yet even another source of stress in my life and frankly I have enough of those without voluntarily taking more on. T says he will do it but realistically he won't so I need to find someone else. Ugh.

Tomorrow I am going to the gym and then just doing stuff around the house. Sunday I am helping make lunch at church - I haven't done that since we re-opened so I am excited about that. Volunteering brings me joy.

Have a good weekend!

I think we skipped fall

I fell like we've moved directly to winter. It was 39 this morning. Thank goodness for fleece pajamas. In other news, T and I have vacation next week - fun is soon to be afoot! :-)

Tonight is kettlebells.

Take care.

Wednesday already???

This week has been pretty busy, but not too bad. Monday I was in the office and went to Anytime Fitness and used the elliptical. Last night I went to Master's and did kettlebells.

It didn't take too long, but it was intense and I used heavier than usual weights, so I felt like I got a good workout. I sent what I had put together for the challenge to Elle, so we'll see what she says. Anyway, I am having fun working on it! I will keep you guys posted.

That's about all I know - just the usual stuff.

Take care.

Oh my gosh!

So I went to the gym yesterday and worked out (which is kinda the point of going to the gym). I spoke with Elle. We are developing a 6 week long class/ challenge that will kick off in January based on the concept of high volume kettlebell swinging. I will come up with each week's workout. Each week we will make a video of me doing the workout and we will do it in the gym as a group 3 times with me helping facilitate.

I am going to be helping teach kettlebells in a real gym y'all!!

Feeling Stuck (again)

This:

07/05/19	152.5	0.1
07/12/19	151.6	-0.9
07/19/19	149.6	-2.0
07/26/19	151.5	1.9
08/02/19
08/09/19	154.1	2.6
08/16/19	155.2	1.1
08/23/19	153.6	-1.6
08/30/19	153.5	-0.1
09/06/19	153.4	-0.1
09/13/19	151.3	-2.1
09/20/19	152.0	0.7
09/27/19	149.4	-2.6
10/04/19	150.9	1.5
10/11/19	151.0	0.1
10/18/19	150.4	-0.6

The 2.6 gained mid August was vacation. The 1.5 early October was prednisone. But still, the reality is I've been hovering around 150 FOREVER. It's time to get it over with already! I need to move to 145. No days off, no cheats, no bullshit excuses until then. Period.

Have a good weekend.

Big accomplishment

When I packed up my house in 2011 to move to Florida, I donated a lot of clothes that didn't fit. I also packed up a bunch in tubs where they have remained. Until today. Today I unpacked the last tub. There are 4 pair of jeans and 1 shirt I think are too small, and 2 shirts I'm not sure I like the fit. Those are all in a single dresser drawer waiting a decision whether I hang onto them or they get donated. But there are no more clothes in tubs waiting for the day I finally lose weight.

Whoops

I didn't mean to drop off the planet - just been busy and focused on other things and hadn't blogged, but everything is fine.

I finished my last class on Saturday, so now I just have to finish my certification package and schedule the exam. My son and his friend are coming up this weekend to help with a few projects around the house - yay! I am looking forward to having a weekend to work on some stuff around here and not think about that work type stuff. :-)

One thing I have managed to do is pull out my fall/ winter clothes:

Saturday I went a bought a couple pair of slacks, so I think I'm okay on the pants front. I could use a pair of navy, but they aren't necessary. I knew I had a lot of tops, I just wasn't sure what fit. So I pulled it all out and tried everything on.  Good times. I have a large pile of stuff to donate - it either doesn't fit or I don't like it. I have enough. Not saying I might not look at tops here and there when I got thrift shopping with mom, but I don't *need* anything. So that's nice. We are moving from our satellite office back to the main office, so I will have to start wearing business casual every day. Sigh.

I am getting together with Elle Saturday after the regular workout to discuss my class she wants me to teach. I will keep you guys posted. I may be making a video!!! If they post it on the facebook page I will let you know.

Have a good day!

Workout

I haven't done as much with the fitness challenge as I would have liked, but last night I finally made it to CrossFit. I did it! Tonight I am going back to the kbell gym, but it was fun to do something different with different people and get out of my comfort zone.

My weight is still a bit up, but I took my last antibiotic and prednisone last night. Hopefully we can turn this bus around.

Overall, feeling better.

Take care.

Things I am doing to take care of myself

The good news is it looks like my boss will be staying through the end of the year! Yay! The (lack of) transition had me worried as this is our busiest time of year. I am still sad and have some concerns, but I feel less stressed about it. He is the best boss I've ever had and I love our team. I have some concerns about how things will be moving forward. I'm working dealing with that uncertainty & stress.

I've watched my eating in spite of being sick and the family stress, and I am thankful of that. Eating won't solve anything, it will just help me ignore it for a little while.

Lastly T and I have been struggling with some issues and after some tough but heartfelt conversations we are taking steps (together and individually) to address them. We deserve to do better for each other, and we are committed to working on it. His mom is home, he seems to be settling in to his job, and we can identify and work on these things now before they become bigger, tougher issues.

I went to the gym last night. As you guys know, I love going to the gym, but before I ever joined I was swinging a kettlebell on my own. I began reading a blog over a decade ago and loved what the author was doing. I read her routines, taught myself by watching videos, copied her routines, made my own routines, and embraced her philosophy. Fast forward and she is now a trainer & author (Tracy Reifkind).

Last night I told Elle how if it hadn't been for having a kettlebell under my desk, these last couple of weeks would have been tough and how awesome it is that I know how with 1 bell, a tiny bit of space, and 20 minutes I can craft a great workout for myself and I wished I could share that. So we are going to do a class at the gym! Can you believe it!? I am going to help develop/ teach a class at a gym!?!? Shut the front door!!! How neat is that?????

Anyway, I am definitely having my ups and downs - on the scale and in my mind, but I'm doing okay.

Take care of yourself.

Carrying on

Two more days of the steroids. My weight is up a pound, but not going any higher. I am not 100%, but am feeling better. I'm tired and am feeling pretty overwhelmed, but I'm doing the best I can right now.

Pseudo gumbo (cooking edition)

Yeah, pretty much. :-)

I was able to get food prep done yesterday, even though I wasn't really feeling it. Since I generally feel like eating, I cook whether I "feel" like it or not! LOL

Menu for this week:

breakfast: overnight oats or "deviled" egg salad toasted on a slice of sprouted grain bread
snack: hummus & veggies
lunch: seafood gumbo & a salad
snack: fruit & plain Greek yogurt

Dinners vary.

The gumbo came out really tasty - I didn't have a recipe and didn't find one I really liked, so I ended up winging it. My husband told me he could sell the heck out of it in a restaurant, so that made me feel good! He came home hungry, so I gave him a cup as an appetizer.

Pseudo gumbo

Saute the trinity (bell pepper, onion, and celery). I used a little olive oil and then sweated it down with a couple tablespoons of white wine. I also added a couple of cloves of garlic. I set that aside. Then I made a roux with ghee and a couple tablespoons of flour. This is where I went off course - I didn't have anything to make fish stock so I used Japanese dashi powder. (Hey, its powdered fish stock!). Cooked my okra and a can of tomatoes in it, added Cajun seasoning blend plus hot sauce and Worcestershire. Once I had seasonings adjusted just to the spicy side I added my shrimp and fish and let them cook in the hot liquid until just done. easy peasy! I'll probably be tired of it by Friday but I was pleased with the result.

Deviled egg salad - This is super easy and I make it "on demand"

1 boiled egg
1/4 avocado
a little bit of shredded cheddar (depends on your calories)
bacon bits (use the real deal)
S&P (I like season salt here)
a squirt of mustard
Just enough mayo to help it hang together (less than a tablespoon)

Mush it all together, put it on bread and toast until cheese is melty. Really good, different, quick, and you can easily adjust your calories and macros.

Ok, have a good day!

Trying to be okay

Ugh, you guys.

My weight is up 1.5 pounds this week. Considering that 1) I am taking prednisone and 2) last night was our eating out night for the week, I am not surprised. But it's still hard to see. Hopefully it will come back off quickly when this is over. In the meantime, I am trying to accept water weight and stay the course with my diet via meal planning.

MIL continues to improve and is ahead of schedule with occupational and physical therapy, so that is good. She will not be able to be left alone for a while, so that will have to get figured out. I am hanging on by my finger nails.

Class 4 of 5 tomorrow. I can't wait for this to be done.

Have a good weekend.

Is this week over yet

My nose is like an old drippy faucet - not gushing, but running just enough to be super annoying. Ugh.

Crazy

I tell ya, the hits just keep coming. Friday I called and got an appointment with my doctor - and I'm glad I did. She told me my ear drum was bulging from the pressure of the yuck. I went to class this weekend - still feeling not good but doing what needed to be done. Sunday I did the grocery shopping, then I took a short nap & had some lunch. My plan was to do food prep after that. T called - my MIL had a stroke and he was on the way home. He came home & had a bite to eat, then we headed to the hospital.

She was doing pretty well, took a turn for the worse Monday, and then woke up yesterday doing better again. So obviously there's a lot that is going to change for my in-laws and my husband is very concerned.

My doctor gave me an antibiotic and prednisone (to dry up the copious drainage).  I am feeling better but I still coughed myself awake a lot the past 2 nights. Last night I skipped the kettlebell gym so we could go to the hospital - I did go a quick workout at lunch with the bell under my desk. This morning I went to spin class.  Food has been on point and I am doing what I can to get rest and manage stress, but it's not easy just now - which means now is when I need it most.

Take care.