Nothing much to update about..
jus did something really dumb yesterday, i have a meeting tomorrow and give tuition..
my fone is totally not working..
i guess it's about time i reflect about the past year and think about what am i goin to do next..
it is the last week of the year again...
i'll be 20 next year. how fast.
it just doesn't feel real.. everything is just flashing past..
yet every sec right now is so real.. you know you're doing something.. but looking back, what have i done?
every min now seems difficult to occupy, yet i still complain i don't have enough time..
geesh.
i look around again, a year changes alot of things...
i learn that it's difficult to plan what you want to do, because you neva know what will happen.. i guess it's ok to make general plans.. but not to details...
i actuallly have no idea what i'm writing.. jus mindless gibberish as everyone can see..
it's late at nite.. i jus dun feel like sleeping.
been thinking about alot of things lately.. mostly goin in circles.. seems like i've got the ans, yet later i'll be unsure..
life,
a simple four letter word.
yet it's so difficult to understand.
not to mention live it...
Monday, December 27, 2004
Sunday, December 26, 2004
Saturday, December 25, 2004
Christmas eve..
if it's de last day of your life what would you do?
1) type a will on my lap top
2) go visit all my frens anywhere they are.
3) arrange teachers for my tuition kids
4) burn a cd for someone taking over my job in mc
5) call him
6) tell everyone who loves me i hate them, dun miss me.
7) donate all my organs that are still usable
8) donate blood first before i die, if it's healthy
9) burn all my diaries
10) listen to songs as i slip away..
if it's de last day of your life what would you do?
1) type a will on my lap top
2) go visit all my frens anywhere they are.
3) arrange teachers for my tuition kids
4) burn a cd for someone taking over my job in mc
5) call him
6) tell everyone who loves me i hate them, dun miss me.
7) donate all my organs that are still usable
8) donate blood first before i die, if it's healthy
9) burn all my diaries
10) listen to songs as i slip away..
So much for my happy ending
oh oh, oh oh, oh oh, oh oh
Oh oh, oh oh, oh...
Let's talk this over
It's not like we're dead
Was it something I did?
Was it something You said?
Don't leave me hanging
In a city so dead
Held up so high
On such a breakable thread
You were all the things I thought I knew
And I thought we could be
CHORUS
You were everything, everything that I wanted
We were meant to be, supposed to be, but we lost it
All of the memories, so close to me, just fade away
All this time you were pretending
So much for my happy ending
oh oh, oh oh, oh oh, oh oh
Oh oh, oh oh
You've got your dumb friends
I know what they say
They tell you I'm difficult
But so are they
But they don't know me
Do they even know you?
All the things you hide from me
All the shit that you do
You were all the things I thought I knew
And I thought we could be
CHORUS
It's nice to know that you were there
Thanks for acting like you cared
And making me feel like I was the only one
It's nice to know we had it all
Thanks for watching as I fall
And letting me know we were done
CHORUS X 2
oh oh, oh oh, oh oh, oh oh
Oh oh, oh oh, oh...
Let's talk this over
It's not like we're dead
Was it something I did?
Was it something You said?
Don't leave me hanging
In a city so dead
Held up so high
On such a breakable thread
You were all the things I thought I knew
And I thought we could be
CHORUS
You were everything, everything that I wanted
We were meant to be, supposed to be, but we lost it
All of the memories, so close to me, just fade away
All this time you were pretending
So much for my happy ending
oh oh, oh oh, oh oh, oh oh
Oh oh, oh oh
You've got your dumb friends
I know what they say
They tell you I'm difficult
But so are they
But they don't know me
Do they even know you?
All the things you hide from me
All the shit that you do
You were all the things I thought I knew
And I thought we could be
CHORUS
It's nice to know that you were there
Thanks for acting like you cared
And making me feel like I was the only one
It's nice to know we had it all
Thanks for watching as I fall
And letting me know we were done
CHORUS X 2
Friday, December 24, 2004
i'm like that:
one day, i'm all hopeful, loving life, living it.
nez day, i'm all down, emotional, depressed...
i love my frens, yet i wonder why do we have frens...
i have dreams, yet i wonder why i have to live on earth for another day..
i work hard one day, nez day i don't even want to lift a finger..
thats me..
walking contradiction.
when you think you've known me enough, think again.
cheers
wr
one day, i'm all hopeful, loving life, living it.
nez day, i'm all down, emotional, depressed...
i love my frens, yet i wonder why do we have frens...
i have dreams, yet i wonder why i have to live on earth for another day..
i work hard one day, nez day i don't even want to lift a finger..
thats me..
walking contradiction.
when you think you've known me enough, think again.
cheers
wr
it's christmas eve tml.. i dun have any holiday mood this year..
i guess it's another tell tale sign that you've grown older.. much older.. i feel much older than 19.. i neva fail to wonder how does it feels like to not know anything, to not go thru exp like my own.. to have a smooth sailing life till 19.. be spoilt, be provided for, be inconsiderate..
i want to be...
knowing too much and when you don't know how to handle the knowledge can be dangerous..
i look into kids' eyes
i see purity
i look into teenagers' eyes
i see hope
i see a chance to change their lives.. to help them to achieve.. to bring those to aspire to a greater heights..
i've never realised this before, i feel like becoming a teacher..
i see hope in them.
i believe when i invest enough time in these kids, i'll actually help them enough..
i guess it's much more than any amount you can earn..
this is freaking me out actually.
christmas eve.
i'm still wondering what am i doing on planet earth.
i'm still looking for myself, who am i?
i look up in the sky and ask what am i suppose to do?
birth of christ.
will i be reborn again on the 25th?
life goes on, much to my reluctance.
cheers
wr
i guess it's another tell tale sign that you've grown older.. much older.. i feel much older than 19.. i neva fail to wonder how does it feels like to not know anything, to not go thru exp like my own.. to have a smooth sailing life till 19.. be spoilt, be provided for, be inconsiderate..
i want to be...
knowing too much and when you don't know how to handle the knowledge can be dangerous..
i look into kids' eyes
i see purity
i look into teenagers' eyes
i see hope
i see a chance to change their lives.. to help them to achieve.. to bring those to aspire to a greater heights..
i've never realised this before, i feel like becoming a teacher..
i see hope in them.
i believe when i invest enough time in these kids, i'll actually help them enough..
i guess it's much more than any amount you can earn..
this is freaking me out actually.
christmas eve.
i'm still wondering what am i doing on planet earth.
i'm still looking for myself, who am i?
i look up in the sky and ask what am i suppose to do?
birth of christ.
will i be reborn again on the 25th?
life goes on, much to my reluctance.
cheers
wr
Monday, December 20, 2004
my bf was back from thailand yesterday! after a 8-day trip, finally
hee heez. rather happy to see him today. he wasn't suppose to meet me on Sundays, cos it's a sacred day to be spent in church and for his family... haha but today is an exception, cos we haven met for so long..
k, enough about my bf, shall keep the excitement to myself as no one is interested in my love life. actually i wonder who's interested in what i'm writing here..
saw the farmer today.. gave my feedbacks to alvin and xiong about the camp.. i guess it was a bad idea.. cos tiong didn't go for the camp and alvin tan din have much to say.... guess they were a little left out. i could see that alvin and xiong were very passionate about the topic, their organisation.. xiong kept nagging me to write an email to his head, as he totally agree with what i said but his head failed to see these points...
anyhow, i've yet to mention about the camp>>
first, some facts about the camp:
Xiong was the camp master of this buddhist camp, hence the farmers took part. partly for a gathering purpose, partly showing our support for our dear brother. i also wanted to learn something about buddhism as i've always been interested, however, lack the chance to get to know about it.
upon reaching, i found out that i was one of the oldest campers ard.. most of the campers were 15 or 16 year-olds who barely graduated from secondary schools... i felt like leaving while we were registering for the camp as i felt like i was going for another orientation camp.. the feelin of signing a contract to give up my freedom for the nezt 4 days and 3 nights.. to act like clowns, smell like dirt and run like hell... i felt that i was too old for such things, there's no longer the kind of excitement that one would exp when they were 15,16... that's when i decided i'm no longer a teenager..
then we changed and prepared for the ice breakers..
i have to say that the games throughout the 3 days were very creative, the stories, the way they linked them all up, the point system which were actually money for the groups to buy ammunition for the race.. i was impressed, very. i wonder how many of the campers appreciated this effort.. the only little flaw in the games was that - they failed to bring out the objective of the games to the little kids.. for them to learn from the games..
for eg - there was a game where we had to protect the "virgin of purity" on a very dangerous journey for a precious scroll.. the groups had to come up with a strategy such that the commander and VOP will survive the journey...
there was a very funny relation of wat the 4 groups did by a really good speaker.. but i tot it would be much betta if the group leaders could have sat down and talked about how the group fare. what have they learn...
thoughout, there was much experience, but little learning.. the games that we played could have easily taught the campers about things that they'll never learn in classes.. about team work, about being considerate, about team building, about learning from mistakes, about decision making. the kids are still unable to really understand these underlying lessons that could be in any game, thus the camp could have been much more enriching, if time were set aside for such discussions... instead of chasing us all to bed for more action the next day. what is the objective?
yes, what is the objective of the camp? this was the question that bugged me ever since i attended the camp. nearly non-stop action without much rationale behind - gives me a feeling that the games were there to entertain the kids. they said it was to make the kids feel that buddhists can be fun loving, not just chanting everyday. the way i saw it - without the meaning behind the games, the games were merely to make the kids happy, like free gifts that comes with a product.. to market buddhism, to recruit more youths, they planned alot of games, to attract the youths. I'm all for it, i do not see anything wrong with that, i think buddhism can be fun, definitely, especially youths should be full of life. However, when they're jus playing for the sake of playing, the opportunity to learn is lost.
Perhaps i expected too much. i expected this camp to be something different.
好玩中带点严肃
not to squeeze buddhism into every little thing that one does in the camp, but learning.. i feel that such camps should touch the hearts of the little kids, to be a turning point for some of them, at least. thou 4 days 3 nites cant do much, but the learning could start to change the kids' thinking, like planting a seed in the kids' heart, hoping it'll blossom into a beautiful flower. to make them more compassionate, considerate, on the whole better persons... i tot this was what basic buddhism is about..
the spiritual component of the camp came in the form of Dharma Talks conducted by the head of the organization.. i have to say that i fully enjoyed the first session, where i was given the opportunity of asking questions about buddhism. Even thou it was a tiring day and i had a really bad headache, i was wide awake after the talk. i had so many burning questions after the introduction to buddhism, partly to see how much they know, partly because of my curiousity.. however, subsequent sessions were disappointing. they were long and i found it difficult to actually remember everything after a 2 hour session.
i agree with alvin that we have to give the speaker credit for trying to bring Dharma to a more comprehensive level for the kids.. however, it was obvious that there were little interest among the campers as they failed to see the rationale behind the talks... to them, they were merely sessions for them to catch up with their sleep.. he could have been more prepared with the lessons, some visual tools like writing on the white board. Also, i had difficulties understanding the points he wished to bring across, sometimes trying to recall the point that led to the stories. Thus the importance of a notebook, to be brought along for every talk. whether they keep it after the camp or not it doesn't matter, what matters is that they've written some notes and it'll stay with them better..
after the camp, i felt that there will always be a tension to promote buddhism and to recruit more members by the way they run the camps... because they have mistaken fun to be the only factor to recruit members..
fun, will only be able to keep them as long as they think the organization is fun.
teach them how to learn, make them feel that the organization can improve their lives, to learn more about buddhism.. once you touch their souls, teach them what they can't learn from school, you've reached out to them, their souls, then, they'll be there for you for as long as they believe. these are the people i would want to recruit.
leadership can be trained.
悟性却须要一点缘分
my two cents worth.
thank you xiong for introducing me to camp. i've learnt alot, seriously.
thank you alvin for being such a good group leader. caring and def the potential of a great leader.
the organization has much potential, having successfully organized 9 camps and goin on strong...
i wish it can touch more hearts in future, spread buddhism among the youths.
cheers
wr
hee heez. rather happy to see him today. he wasn't suppose to meet me on Sundays, cos it's a sacred day to be spent in church and for his family... haha but today is an exception, cos we haven met for so long..
k, enough about my bf, shall keep the excitement to myself as no one is interested in my love life. actually i wonder who's interested in what i'm writing here..
saw the farmer today.. gave my feedbacks to alvin and xiong about the camp.. i guess it was a bad idea.. cos tiong didn't go for the camp and alvin tan din have much to say.... guess they were a little left out. i could see that alvin and xiong were very passionate about the topic, their organisation.. xiong kept nagging me to write an email to his head, as he totally agree with what i said but his head failed to see these points...
anyhow, i've yet to mention about the camp>>
first, some facts about the camp:
Xiong was the camp master of this buddhist camp, hence the farmers took part. partly for a gathering purpose, partly showing our support for our dear brother. i also wanted to learn something about buddhism as i've always been interested, however, lack the chance to get to know about it.
upon reaching, i found out that i was one of the oldest campers ard.. most of the campers were 15 or 16 year-olds who barely graduated from secondary schools... i felt like leaving while we were registering for the camp as i felt like i was going for another orientation camp.. the feelin of signing a contract to give up my freedom for the nezt 4 days and 3 nights.. to act like clowns, smell like dirt and run like hell... i felt that i was too old for such things, there's no longer the kind of excitement that one would exp when they were 15,16... that's when i decided i'm no longer a teenager..
then we changed and prepared for the ice breakers..
i have to say that the games throughout the 3 days were very creative, the stories, the way they linked them all up, the point system which were actually money for the groups to buy ammunition for the race.. i was impressed, very. i wonder how many of the campers appreciated this effort.. the only little flaw in the games was that - they failed to bring out the objective of the games to the little kids.. for them to learn from the games..
for eg - there was a game where we had to protect the "virgin of purity" on a very dangerous journey for a precious scroll.. the groups had to come up with a strategy such that the commander and VOP will survive the journey...
there was a very funny relation of wat the 4 groups did by a really good speaker.. but i tot it would be much betta if the group leaders could have sat down and talked about how the group fare. what have they learn...
thoughout, there was much experience, but little learning.. the games that we played could have easily taught the campers about things that they'll never learn in classes.. about team work, about being considerate, about team building, about learning from mistakes, about decision making. the kids are still unable to really understand these underlying lessons that could be in any game, thus the camp could have been much more enriching, if time were set aside for such discussions... instead of chasing us all to bed for more action the next day. what is the objective?
yes, what is the objective of the camp? this was the question that bugged me ever since i attended the camp. nearly non-stop action without much rationale behind - gives me a feeling that the games were there to entertain the kids. they said it was to make the kids feel that buddhists can be fun loving, not just chanting everyday. the way i saw it - without the meaning behind the games, the games were merely to make the kids happy, like free gifts that comes with a product.. to market buddhism, to recruit more youths, they planned alot of games, to attract the youths. I'm all for it, i do not see anything wrong with that, i think buddhism can be fun, definitely, especially youths should be full of life. However, when they're jus playing for the sake of playing, the opportunity to learn is lost.
Perhaps i expected too much. i expected this camp to be something different.
好玩中带点严肃
not to squeeze buddhism into every little thing that one does in the camp, but learning.. i feel that such camps should touch the hearts of the little kids, to be a turning point for some of them, at least. thou 4 days 3 nites cant do much, but the learning could start to change the kids' thinking, like planting a seed in the kids' heart, hoping it'll blossom into a beautiful flower. to make them more compassionate, considerate, on the whole better persons... i tot this was what basic buddhism is about..
the spiritual component of the camp came in the form of Dharma Talks conducted by the head of the organization.. i have to say that i fully enjoyed the first session, where i was given the opportunity of asking questions about buddhism. Even thou it was a tiring day and i had a really bad headache, i was wide awake after the talk. i had so many burning questions after the introduction to buddhism, partly to see how much they know, partly because of my curiousity.. however, subsequent sessions were disappointing. they were long and i found it difficult to actually remember everything after a 2 hour session.
i agree with alvin that we have to give the speaker credit for trying to bring Dharma to a more comprehensive level for the kids.. however, it was obvious that there were little interest among the campers as they failed to see the rationale behind the talks... to them, they were merely sessions for them to catch up with their sleep.. he could have been more prepared with the lessons, some visual tools like writing on the white board. Also, i had difficulties understanding the points he wished to bring across, sometimes trying to recall the point that led to the stories. Thus the importance of a notebook, to be brought along for every talk. whether they keep it after the camp or not it doesn't matter, what matters is that they've written some notes and it'll stay with them better..
after the camp, i felt that there will always be a tension to promote buddhism and to recruit more members by the way they run the camps... because they have mistaken fun to be the only factor to recruit members..
fun, will only be able to keep them as long as they think the organization is fun.
teach them how to learn, make them feel that the organization can improve their lives, to learn more about buddhism.. once you touch their souls, teach them what they can't learn from school, you've reached out to them, their souls, then, they'll be there for you for as long as they believe. these are the people i would want to recruit.
leadership can be trained.
悟性却须要一点缘分
my two cents worth.
thank you xiong for introducing me to camp. i've learnt alot, seriously.
thank you alvin for being such a good group leader. caring and def the potential of a great leader.
the organization has much potential, having successfully organized 9 camps and goin on strong...
i wish it can touch more hearts in future, spread buddhism among the youths.
cheers
wr
Sunday, December 19, 2004
I've been a selfish all along..
i've complained about my partners being irresponsible, not keeping me updated, not taking the time to talk to me, to pacify me.. actually the person that i loved the most was myself.
i tot i knew how a relationship should be like, i knew i was abit more dependent, but i tot all that was reasonable..
until the camp.
love in most relationships are conditional..
when one fails to meet up to the expectations of the other, it makes the other feels upset.
a scientific research shows that when a person sees another whom he or she likes, the body gives out a chemical that makes one feels good...
so the nez time you want to meet your partner and he can't turn up.. you're feeling upset cos you cant feel that good, instead of not being able to see him.
i hope i can rem this.
keep this in my mind, so i won't get angry, upset with him so often.. when it's really not his fault..
when he really have things to attend to..
i guess i'm more of a burden to him right now than a partner, who can help him on his journey..
he had to take time off church, sch, social life.. jus for me..
love is about sacrifices ? i dun think so.
if i dun expect him to be with me so often, he doesn't have to give up so many things.. and i dun see myself a sacrificing anything..
i'm loving someone and being happy.
living meaningfully and dying joyfully- Ven Ajahn
i'm grateful.
wr
i've complained about my partners being irresponsible, not keeping me updated, not taking the time to talk to me, to pacify me.. actually the person that i loved the most was myself.
i tot i knew how a relationship should be like, i knew i was abit more dependent, but i tot all that was reasonable..
until the camp.
love in most relationships are conditional..
when one fails to meet up to the expectations of the other, it makes the other feels upset.
a scientific research shows that when a person sees another whom he or she likes, the body gives out a chemical that makes one feels good...
so the nez time you want to meet your partner and he can't turn up.. you're feeling upset cos you cant feel that good, instead of not being able to see him.
i hope i can rem this.
keep this in my mind, so i won't get angry, upset with him so often.. when it's really not his fault..
when he really have things to attend to..
i guess i'm more of a burden to him right now than a partner, who can help him on his journey..
he had to take time off church, sch, social life.. jus for me..
love is about sacrifices ? i dun think so.
if i dun expect him to be with me so often, he doesn't have to give up so many things.. and i dun see myself a sacrificing anything..
i'm loving someone and being happy.
living meaningfully and dying joyfully- Ven Ajahn
i'm grateful.
wr
Thursday, December 09, 2004
after a whole morning of trying to change the look of my blog, to learning how to make webpage... i guess i din accomplish alot..
i read my sister's blog.
gave me an insight to how she feels... how she view life..
picking up the pieces she left behind then.. she's picking herself up..
what about me?
i feel lost in time.
I'm wondering..
wonder when did i start to lose my close frens,
wonder when did my life only revolved ard me, my bf and my family,
wonder when did i start to feel that i cant go on without working,
wonder when did i become so reclusive...
almost alone.
how much do i noe about kw, niang niang?
hadn't we been meeting up?
how much do i noe about siok, hui-u, yj, yd?
how long was it since i really talked to them?
how are the farmers?
since when did i lost them as well?
how much do they know about the me now?
i still talk to eugene thou..
one person that i can say everything to..
haha somehow he doesn't have much to tell me..
things will change.
things always do.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
for all whose paths crossed mine somewhere in my life:
i'm glad our paths crossed.
may it always overlap.. may i always have the honour to have you in my life...
但是若从此以后，我们只是两道平行线，
may it be fond memories that i left you with...
你我的相逢，
是缘分。
离别，
却不一定是悲伤的。
好朋友，
到了天涯海角
还是知己。
一个眼神， 一句话
你会了解。
你最近还好吗？
i read my sister's blog.
gave me an insight to how she feels... how she view life..
picking up the pieces she left behind then.. she's picking herself up..
what about me?
i feel lost in time.
I'm wondering..
wonder when did i start to lose my close frens,
wonder when did my life only revolved ard me, my bf and my family,
wonder when did i start to feel that i cant go on without working,
wonder when did i become so reclusive...
almost alone.
how much do i noe about kw, niang niang?
hadn't we been meeting up?
how much do i noe about siok, hui-u, yj, yd?
how long was it since i really talked to them?
how are the farmers?
since when did i lost them as well?
how much do they know about the me now?
i still talk to eugene thou..
one person that i can say everything to..
haha somehow he doesn't have much to tell me..
things will change.
things always do.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
for all whose paths crossed mine somewhere in my life:
i'm glad our paths crossed.
may it always overlap.. may i always have the honour to have you in my life...
但是若从此以后，我们只是两道平行线，
may it be fond memories that i left you with...
你我的相逢，
是缘分。
离别，
却不一定是悲伤的。
好朋友，
到了天涯海角
还是知己。
一个眼神， 一句话
你会了解。
你最近还好吗？
Wednesday, December 08, 2004
Wouldn't it be nice if you get to choose what you want to remember instead of being forced to rem them.. as clear as crystal?
i guess it's as good as saying we should get to choose how we look, our parents and all that...
but i jus cant help wondering..
there are things that are so difficult to get out of ur system as hard as u try..
time will change these things.. from being painful, irritating to something of a neutral nature...
i prefer to see it as time changing me... from being vulnerable to such memories to becoming used to it.. de-sensitizing .. the word they used for media violence.. the nature of memories is relative to u. the memories will always be that, it's a fact, irreversible.. ur reaction to it, is what matters.
similarly, with objects.. things that u hold dear to ur heart today, may be come the same thing that cause that ache in ur heart whenever you look at it tomorrow.. because the memory, the fact that is tied to that object, is no longer a sweet memory. it's the human that is changing, instead of the memories morphing into some different state...
actually it's all mindless giberish.
anyway, as i was saying... memories....
i heard yesterday, on tv "my husband is the reason why i want to wake up everyday.."
there was once in my life when i wished i never wake up in the morning. not suicidal thou, just the pure reluctance to climb out of bed to face the reality. but things jus had to work against you... u lose sleep at nite.. cry urself to bed.. waking up at the first ray of sunshine and neva able to get back to sleep again.. u stay awake about 20 hours a day..
all you do is think about how unfair the world is to u.
how little faith you have.
how painful you feel.
how little you have left.
how pitiful you are.
how much you hang on to the little hope in you.
i felt small.
pitiful
helpless
lonely
aimless
unwanted
it may seem dumb to alot of people...
i once assumed how stupid i'd look to myself in the future.
i guess i was wrong.
if i had to go through all that again, i would have felt the same; i would have felt as small, as useless, as dumped...
i neva doubted this thus far...
i had been too trusting, i have had too much faith in the little thing called love.. i had too much hope...
but that was me. i believed in fairy tales then, i tot miracles happen. i thought that was still place for fairy tales to come true in the real world, because love will conquer everything...
but i was wrong.
love cannot conquer the media.
love cannot replace bread and butter.
love will never replace the kind of disappointed one will cause to one's parents...
most of all, people no longer have faith in love, they no longer know the meaning of love.
for dignity,
money,
and trivial things... people compromised love..
because everyone's got hurt before, somewhere, somehow, by someone or anyone..
they lose faith.
they get lost.
they then start to hurt others.. in other way...
they become more withdrawn, only thinking about people that they know personally, like frens or family.. others, only themselves...
it's a selfish world.
ever wondered how a world full of love will be like?
perhaps bush will be in iraq taking care of injured kids.
perhaps china would have forgiven japan long ago and stopped them from paying the reparations.
there won
perhaps taiwan wouldn't have leaders saying they want independence and china wont be forcing them to return to china.
quizas quizas quizas...
i guess it's as good as saying we should get to choose how we look, our parents and all that...
but i jus cant help wondering..
there are things that are so difficult to get out of ur system as hard as u try..
time will change these things.. from being painful, irritating to something of a neutral nature...
i prefer to see it as time changing me... from being vulnerable to such memories to becoming used to it.. de-sensitizing .. the word they used for media violence.. the nature of memories is relative to u. the memories will always be that, it's a fact, irreversible.. ur reaction to it, is what matters.
similarly, with objects.. things that u hold dear to ur heart today, may be come the same thing that cause that ache in ur heart whenever you look at it tomorrow.. because the memory, the fact that is tied to that object, is no longer a sweet memory. it's the human that is changing, instead of the memories morphing into some different state...
actually it's all mindless giberish.
anyway, as i was saying... memories....
i heard yesterday, on tv "my husband is the reason why i want to wake up everyday.."
there was once in my life when i wished i never wake up in the morning. not suicidal thou, just the pure reluctance to climb out of bed to face the reality. but things jus had to work against you... u lose sleep at nite.. cry urself to bed.. waking up at the first ray of sunshine and neva able to get back to sleep again.. u stay awake about 20 hours a day..
all you do is think about how unfair the world is to u.
how little faith you have.
how painful you feel.
how little you have left.
how pitiful you are.
how much you hang on to the little hope in you.
i felt small.
pitiful
helpless
lonely
aimless
unwanted
it may seem dumb to alot of people...
i once assumed how stupid i'd look to myself in the future.
i guess i was wrong.
if i had to go through all that again, i would have felt the same; i would have felt as small, as useless, as dumped...
i neva doubted this thus far...
i had been too trusting, i have had too much faith in the little thing called love.. i had too much hope...
but that was me. i believed in fairy tales then, i tot miracles happen. i thought that was still place for fairy tales to come true in the real world, because love will conquer everything...
but i was wrong.
love cannot conquer the media.
love cannot replace bread and butter.
love will never replace the kind of disappointed one will cause to one's parents...
most of all, people no longer have faith in love, they no longer know the meaning of love.
for dignity,
money,
and trivial things... people compromised love..
because everyone's got hurt before, somewhere, somehow, by someone or anyone..
they lose faith.
they get lost.
they then start to hurt others.. in other way...
they become more withdrawn, only thinking about people that they know personally, like frens or family.. others, only themselves...
it's a selfish world.
ever wondered how a world full of love will be like?
perhaps bush will be in iraq taking care of injured kids.
perhaps china would have forgiven japan long ago and stopped them from paying the reparations.
there won
perhaps taiwan wouldn't have leaders saying they want independence and china wont be forcing them to return to china.
quizas quizas quizas...
Friday, December 03, 2004
Tuesday, November 30, 2004
i jus had the chance to read the pprs today, thou i haven been too busy, din really felt like reading the news these few days.
anyway>> the forum today has a whole lot to say about the recent changes in teaching chinese, some mother complaining about the chinese programmes in singapore and a teacher's response to his fellow colleagues on the teachers in singapore being too stressed out.
the recent changes in how to betta teach mandarin in order to allow our younger generation to master the language looks really promising. it actually aims to combine the idea of creative learning and at the same time cultivate students' interests instead of forcefeeding them, like they do with other subjects. it seems like a really big step forward for our education system. chinese is no longer about knowing how to write the words, merely learning how to read them, it's more about conversing in mandarin, instead of writing - as our education minister claimed. so our system is goin to emphasize on daily usage of mandarin, the students no longer have to learn how to write the words in the "ci yu shou ce", which accompanied me though my years of studying the language. words that are less used in daily conversing will be taken out of the syllabus, which makes me wonder what is goin to be left. NI WO TA? who is the one deciding what is being used daily anyway?
promising indeed.
our system has once again bowed down to the students.
this means that if our students continue to show no interest in chinese, we're goin to change the system once again.
but i'm afraid this kind of flexibility is only limited to teaching chinese.
is it because other subjects are already flexible enough? that the teachers teaching other subjects have nurtured enough interests in the youths, such that they have no problem with interest? is it because the syllabus for other subjects is what we need for life?
i really wonder.
let's talk about flexibility.
i dun remember maths having alot of flexibility while my teacher teach them. perhaps there was interests, but we all know that we cant fail maths - that's the biggest push factor. we are, after all, product of the institutionalised kind of education system in singapore.
sciences, flexibility? if u call powerpoint presentation flexibility. tell me again, how many of us pulled though because of the ten years series? i bet those that got A for sci in a level must have done them at least twice, plus alot of prelim pprs from other schs.
now about GP, i cant say for other schools. because apparently, where i came from, we had really weak english grades in O's. Hence, most of the time we were concentrating on how to write a good argument instead of debating about how piracy will actually affect the economy.
look, there has neva been flexibility in the system. when u start somewhere, u start with the most useless subject that you think. so what if china is the nez super power, they're goin to learn english anyway. when u wanna implement creative thinking and not know how it will turn out, u use chinese as a white mice, to test out how it will work with the students. if it doesn't turn out well, then blame it on the family, the lack of interests of student. it's never the system's fault.
i'm not saying i'm all for rote learning of chinese. but when u say there's no interests, can u say that you have interests for all the subjects you're taking? it's a simple excuse for not trying. parents engage a tutor for a subject for their children as long as it counts towards their aggregate. it's wrong. but they can go so far even if the students does not have interests. they only started complaining they have no interests because it's no longer a subject in the criteria. i really think they should be taught about shame. the kind of shame of not knowing one's mother tongue. it's not about blaming them or their background, it's not about shaming them. it's about "lian chi". they should learn that when u call urself a chinese, even a singaporean chinese, when u go out there, u'll always be a chinese. Even if u speak the most fluent english, the best english, french, german - ultimately, u dunnoe ur mother tongue. it's called the mother tongue for a reason. u can tell the world "hey, you noe what? i've mastered french, german, japanese, korean and everything." and u dunnoe ur mother tongue, you're really not that great after all.
well, the mindset of being cool not knowing mandarin should also be changed. i'm qt sick of hearing "i dun understand chinese, please dun speak to me in chinese" from fellow chinese singaporeans. sometimes i feel that there's a tinge of arrogance when they say that. where did all these superiority sprung up from? i should look down on u for not knowing ur mother tongue, not the other way around.
dun get me wrong, i'm not trying to start a hate club for those who knows their MT against those who don't. i guess the former will def lose out in numbers anyway. who wants to be in the 'loser crowd'?
anyway enough of the chinese topic..
to the mum that complained about the chinese programme on channel 8 with the word "bastard" in the subtitles:
guess what? ur kid is not goin to be protected forever. protecting them and censoring what they see or hear are not goin to help them. when u see someone smoking, u tell ur kids never to touch cigarettes. do u jus cover their eyes and hope that they neva see cigarettes in their life? u teach them to differentiate the good from the bad, to choose to be good, to learn to be good to themselves. u tell them why not to smoke, why not to use vulgarities to punctuate their sentences, you teach them what u learn from the tv is not always rite.
it is your job to educate your kids at the family level. dont expect other people to look after your kids.
if u think that the producer should change the time of the programme jus because ur kids are watching tv at 7 o'clock in the evening, mayb it's easier if u write to the forum and tell the mothers to sit there at 7 pm and educate the kids while watching the show together?
dun blame everything on others.
dun blame it on interests, the society, the system, the media, the teachers.
if u have not thought about where did u go wrong, u've most probably already gone wrong.
anyway>> the forum today has a whole lot to say about the recent changes in teaching chinese, some mother complaining about the chinese programmes in singapore and a teacher's response to his fellow colleagues on the teachers in singapore being too stressed out.
the recent changes in how to betta teach mandarin in order to allow our younger generation to master the language looks really promising. it actually aims to combine the idea of creative learning and at the same time cultivate students' interests instead of forcefeeding them, like they do with other subjects. it seems like a really big step forward for our education system. chinese is no longer about knowing how to write the words, merely learning how to read them, it's more about conversing in mandarin, instead of writing - as our education minister claimed. so our system is goin to emphasize on daily usage of mandarin, the students no longer have to learn how to write the words in the "ci yu shou ce", which accompanied me though my years of studying the language. words that are less used in daily conversing will be taken out of the syllabus, which makes me wonder what is goin to be left. NI WO TA? who is the one deciding what is being used daily anyway?
promising indeed.
our system has once again bowed down to the students.
this means that if our students continue to show no interest in chinese, we're goin to change the system once again.
but i'm afraid this kind of flexibility is only limited to teaching chinese.
is it because other subjects are already flexible enough? that the teachers teaching other subjects have nurtured enough interests in the youths, such that they have no problem with interest? is it because the syllabus for other subjects is what we need for life?
i really wonder.
let's talk about flexibility.
i dun remember maths having alot of flexibility while my teacher teach them. perhaps there was interests, but we all know that we cant fail maths - that's the biggest push factor. we are, after all, product of the institutionalised kind of education system in singapore.
sciences, flexibility? if u call powerpoint presentation flexibility. tell me again, how many of us pulled though because of the ten years series? i bet those that got A for sci in a level must have done them at least twice, plus alot of prelim pprs from other schs.
now about GP, i cant say for other schools. because apparently, where i came from, we had really weak english grades in O's. Hence, most of the time we were concentrating on how to write a good argument instead of debating about how piracy will actually affect the economy.
look, there has neva been flexibility in the system. when u start somewhere, u start with the most useless subject that you think. so what if china is the nez super power, they're goin to learn english anyway. when u wanna implement creative thinking and not know how it will turn out, u use chinese as a white mice, to test out how it will work with the students. if it doesn't turn out well, then blame it on the family, the lack of interests of student. it's never the system's fault.
i'm not saying i'm all for rote learning of chinese. but when u say there's no interests, can u say that you have interests for all the subjects you're taking? it's a simple excuse for not trying. parents engage a tutor for a subject for their children as long as it counts towards their aggregate. it's wrong. but they can go so far even if the students does not have interests. they only started complaining they have no interests because it's no longer a subject in the criteria. i really think they should be taught about shame. the kind of shame of not knowing one's mother tongue. it's not about blaming them or their background, it's not about shaming them. it's about "lian chi". they should learn that when u call urself a chinese, even a singaporean chinese, when u go out there, u'll always be a chinese. Even if u speak the most fluent english, the best english, french, german - ultimately, u dunnoe ur mother tongue. it's called the mother tongue for a reason. u can tell the world "hey, you noe what? i've mastered french, german, japanese, korean and everything." and u dunnoe ur mother tongue, you're really not that great after all.
well, the mindset of being cool not knowing mandarin should also be changed. i'm qt sick of hearing "i dun understand chinese, please dun speak to me in chinese" from fellow chinese singaporeans. sometimes i feel that there's a tinge of arrogance when they say that. where did all these superiority sprung up from? i should look down on u for not knowing ur mother tongue, not the other way around.
dun get me wrong, i'm not trying to start a hate club for those who knows their MT against those who don't. i guess the former will def lose out in numbers anyway. who wants to be in the 'loser crowd'?
anyway enough of the chinese topic..
to the mum that complained about the chinese programme on channel 8 with the word "bastard" in the subtitles:
guess what? ur kid is not goin to be protected forever. protecting them and censoring what they see or hear are not goin to help them. when u see someone smoking, u tell ur kids never to touch cigarettes. do u jus cover their eyes and hope that they neva see cigarettes in their life? u teach them to differentiate the good from the bad, to choose to be good, to learn to be good to themselves. u tell them why not to smoke, why not to use vulgarities to punctuate their sentences, you teach them what u learn from the tv is not always rite.
it is your job to educate your kids at the family level. dont expect other people to look after your kids.
if u think that the producer should change the time of the programme jus because ur kids are watching tv at 7 o'clock in the evening, mayb it's easier if u write to the forum and tell the mothers to sit there at 7 pm and educate the kids while watching the show together?
dun blame everything on others.
dun blame it on interests, the society, the system, the media, the teachers.
if u have not thought about where did u go wrong, u've most probably already gone wrong.
Friday, November 19, 2004
all the hype about a chinese that went missing in singapore and later found murdered lately...
my heart totally goes out for the girl. i think no matter what kind of grudges adults have against each other should neva neva be taken out on a kid. Moreover she's only 8... what kind of sick pervert can actually murder such a kid... i just feel that whatever that has happened, she's the most innocent victim out of the whole episode...
the case is still being looked into.
i guess as much as the killer is responsible. i cant help but think about what kind of mother would leave a girl in a foreign country for nearly a week or more. and the thing is, she has the cheek to say it's not the first time. If the mother really had the child's interest at heart, really loved her child, would she had done that? leav the girl with some fellow tenant and go back to china. yes, singapore is safe, she had exams... so what? even if it is not foreseeable that something so drastic could happen, some minor accidents like being scalded when she's left alone at home? for god's sake it's an 8 year old we are talking about, not a 14 or 15 year old kid. as much as everyone has different standards of how independant a kid should be, as a mother who ought to be doting on her daughter, how could she ?
it is when the little ger went missing, when the little girl was found dead, then she tot of buying her toys, greatest funeral in the whole wide world, nicest clothes..
i jus cant help but feel that she was doing all that for show.. i dont mean she did not do it sincerely for her child. perhaps due to my own prejudice, i jus cant help it. that she could get more coverage, get more sympathy.. perhaps i'm jus cynical.
On top of that, i CANNOT believe that singaporeans can be so gullible, stupid, naive and rich.
they have given the money to the parents willingly, without duress. they did not stop and think about whether the money will be put into good use. they did not think about wat has led to the kid's death. Out of compassion and not knowing how else to show their condolences, they gave money.
after they realised how much everyone has given the parents, then they started to regret. and wanted to know exactly how much they've given in total. the parents then say that they're going to give half to charity and the other half to bring back to china.
firstly, so what if you knew how much they have? what is it goin to change? you have given the money, it's theirs. How much is it doesn't really concern you. I jus dont understand how singaporean's brain work... it doesn't mean that the money comes from you, den they have to do what eva you say. it was a gratuitous gift, and it is their's to keep. If you had given the money sincerely, You should really keep ur gap shut. IT IS NOT A CHARITY SHOW WE HAVE ON TV, WHERE THEY ANNOUNCE THE AMOUNT THE RECEIVE EVERY SECOND. the parents have not called for "donation" and they do not have the liability to declose the amount. WAKE UP!!
Secondly, even though the father had promised to make donations with half the money he had taken, seriously, he really has no obligation to carry that promise out. so what if the money was given to them by locals, it doesn't mean they have to do good to our place. i can only think of two possible reasons that the locals are so insistent in the donation promise: (1) they're stupid enough to base on the promise make donations (2) they're merely insistent because they're unhappy that the couple should leave singapore withe so much of our money, and regret giving them so much money. and the only way they can sort of take back some money, is to insist that the couple honour their promise of making donation.
i think singaporeans have made a real fool of themselves. first, by donating money at first instance. money really isn't everything and totally show foreigners how we value life, with money. when they think there's nothing much they can help, they give money. there's a million and one things to do, like simply set up a webpage for the girl, to go and pay respect to her. jus say a little prayer for the girl, and if u wan media coverage, do it in a big group outside taka or something. Why is it that the only thing the singaporeans can give is money.
second, to ask how much money in total they have collected. even go to the extend of waiting outside the court jus to ask. it jus seems to me, the singaporeans have the mentallity that since the money was given by them, they have the right to know the total amount. that they have the right over how they use the money that was GIVEN to the couple. if it was so important how they use, then dun give them in the first place. make donations in the girl's name instead my dear fellow singaporeans.
i jus urge adults to stop acting like fools. if u wanna show compassion, there are million and one ways. if u use abit of brain, and abit of common sense, all these wouldn't have happened. it's unbelievable how naive our people have become. doing charity does not means giving money!
i guess we'll have to thank our mediacorp for all the charity shows for teaching our people that.
mayb we should have a circus of mediacorp artists at the funeral.
my heart totally goes out for the girl. i think no matter what kind of grudges adults have against each other should neva neva be taken out on a kid. Moreover she's only 8... what kind of sick pervert can actually murder such a kid... i just feel that whatever that has happened, she's the most innocent victim out of the whole episode...
the case is still being looked into.
i guess as much as the killer is responsible. i cant help but think about what kind of mother would leave a girl in a foreign country for nearly a week or more. and the thing is, she has the cheek to say it's not the first time. If the mother really had the child's interest at heart, really loved her child, would she had done that? leav the girl with some fellow tenant and go back to china. yes, singapore is safe, she had exams... so what? even if it is not foreseeable that something so drastic could happen, some minor accidents like being scalded when she's left alone at home? for god's sake it's an 8 year old we are talking about, not a 14 or 15 year old kid. as much as everyone has different standards of how independant a kid should be, as a mother who ought to be doting on her daughter, how could she ?
it is when the little ger went missing, when the little girl was found dead, then she tot of buying her toys, greatest funeral in the whole wide world, nicest clothes..
i jus cant help but feel that she was doing all that for show.. i dont mean she did not do it sincerely for her child. perhaps due to my own prejudice, i jus cant help it. that she could get more coverage, get more sympathy.. perhaps i'm jus cynical.
On top of that, i CANNOT believe that singaporeans can be so gullible, stupid, naive and rich.
they have given the money to the parents willingly, without duress. they did not stop and think about whether the money will be put into good use. they did not think about wat has led to the kid's death. Out of compassion and not knowing how else to show their condolences, they gave money.
after they realised how much everyone has given the parents, then they started to regret. and wanted to know exactly how much they've given in total. the parents then say that they're going to give half to charity and the other half to bring back to china.
firstly, so what if you knew how much they have? what is it goin to change? you have given the money, it's theirs. How much is it doesn't really concern you. I jus dont understand how singaporean's brain work... it doesn't mean that the money comes from you, den they have to do what eva you say. it was a gratuitous gift, and it is their's to keep. If you had given the money sincerely, You should really keep ur gap shut. IT IS NOT A CHARITY SHOW WE HAVE ON TV, WHERE THEY ANNOUNCE THE AMOUNT THE RECEIVE EVERY SECOND. the parents have not called for "donation" and they do not have the liability to declose the amount. WAKE UP!!
Secondly, even though the father had promised to make donations with half the money he had taken, seriously, he really has no obligation to carry that promise out. so what if the money was given to them by locals, it doesn't mean they have to do good to our place. i can only think of two possible reasons that the locals are so insistent in the donation promise: (1) they're stupid enough to base on the promise make donations (2) they're merely insistent because they're unhappy that the couple should leave singapore withe so much of our money, and regret giving them so much money. and the only way they can sort of take back some money, is to insist that the couple honour their promise of making donation.
i think singaporeans have made a real fool of themselves. first, by donating money at first instance. money really isn't everything and totally show foreigners how we value life, with money. when they think there's nothing much they can help, they give money. there's a million and one things to do, like simply set up a webpage for the girl, to go and pay respect to her. jus say a little prayer for the girl, and if u wan media coverage, do it in a big group outside taka or something. Why is it that the only thing the singaporeans can give is money.
second, to ask how much money in total they have collected. even go to the extend of waiting outside the court jus to ask. it jus seems to me, the singaporeans have the mentallity that since the money was given by them, they have the right to know the total amount. that they have the right over how they use the money that was GIVEN to the couple. if it was so important how they use, then dun give them in the first place. make donations in the girl's name instead my dear fellow singaporeans.
i jus urge adults to stop acting like fools. if u wanna show compassion, there are million and one ways. if u use abit of brain, and abit of common sense, all these wouldn't have happened. it's unbelievable how naive our people have become. doing charity does not means giving money!
i guess we'll have to thank our mediacorp for all the charity shows for teaching our people that.
mayb we should have a circus of mediacorp artists at the funeral.
I wonder if i'm too stressed up by exams or because of pms... or perhaps jus one of my really whiny mood.
I'm jus very disappointed.
Disappointed in something people call love. Something that people claimed to bring two people together and try to work things out and stay together. Something that adds colour to one's life. Something that is suppose to bring joy to ur life. Something that you share with a special someone that is out there in some corner of the world. Someone that you will one day meet and just know that he is the one.
They've said so many things.
I'm starting to wonder... wonder what really is the meaning. What is the objective. What is it that you are suppose to do?
i thought i found it.
i would think i've dated people of different character. Different ways of knowing them, different ways of developing infatuation into relationship. Different ways of showing their love. Different ways of communication. Different ways of maintaining a relationship..
i guess there'll be a universal way of showing how u love someone. Somethings dont differ very much. you may say that you have a different way of showing ur love, somehow i jus don't feel it...
dun blame it on expectations. it's not... it's jus an intuition.
u noe about my insecurities, you noe how little faith i have in relationship..
i guess there's nothing much you can do to regain my faith...
Mayb u do love me... maybe u think you love me.. only time can tell if you really love or you are jus fulfilling some promise that you've got urself into...
in the end, it all becomes an endurance game... How much u can endure me, and how long can i take being a burden. How long it takes me to find out there is no longer anything left for me to stay.
it jus feels like my 2nd relationship all over again...
i dunnoe where is this goin...
mayb its high time i really give up on relationship all together...
or it's jus my emotional side showing itself today...
I'm jus very disappointed.
Disappointed in something people call love. Something that people claimed to bring two people together and try to work things out and stay together. Something that adds colour to one's life. Something that is suppose to bring joy to ur life. Something that you share with a special someone that is out there in some corner of the world. Someone that you will one day meet and just know that he is the one.
They've said so many things.
I'm starting to wonder... wonder what really is the meaning. What is the objective. What is it that you are suppose to do?
i thought i found it.
i would think i've dated people of different character. Different ways of knowing them, different ways of developing infatuation into relationship. Different ways of showing their love. Different ways of communication. Different ways of maintaining a relationship..
i guess there'll be a universal way of showing how u love someone. Somethings dont differ very much. you may say that you have a different way of showing ur love, somehow i jus don't feel it...
dun blame it on expectations. it's not... it's jus an intuition.
u noe about my insecurities, you noe how little faith i have in relationship..
i guess there's nothing much you can do to regain my faith...
Mayb u do love me... maybe u think you love me.. only time can tell if you really love or you are jus fulfilling some promise that you've got urself into...
in the end, it all becomes an endurance game... How much u can endure me, and how long can i take being a burden. How long it takes me to find out there is no longer anything left for me to stay.
it jus feels like my 2nd relationship all over again...
i dunnoe where is this goin...
mayb its high time i really give up on relationship all together...
or it's jus my emotional side showing itself today...
Tuesday, November 16, 2004
when you're alone, when you're down and out, when you're faced with difficulties and problems to solve, when u've gotta push urself to move on...
althou there's nothing much that can be done... i guess there'll always be a name, a face, that will make things seems easier... there'll always be words and memories that keep you going... there'll always be hope and dreams that push u on...
althou there's nothing much that can be done... i guess there'll always be a name, a face, that will make things seems easier... there'll always be words and memories that keep you going... there'll always be hope and dreams that push u on...
Thursday, November 11, 2004
Jus had my 24 hour sls assignment yesterday and handed it up this morning. i really have no idea how i have done and would prefer not to find out too soon. The question was quite general, thus we had to do reseach on it first. However, the internet is so vast, everything seems relevant. On top of that, even if i had my own ideas, it jus did not feel rite to write them in the pprs unless i had substantiation or proof from submission or pprs that other people wrote on the internet. it jus seems like i don't have any confidence in what i thought of.
i guess after enrolling into law sch, my confidence level has been dipping and it's currently at the new low. I guess as bad as i was, i've never doubt myself so much before. I've always believed that hardwork will never get you to the top, however it'll bring you somewhere near the top. It jus doesn't seems applicable anymore. or is it that i've not been working hard enough? firstly, i lose out in my language, writen or spoken, i just don't have it. I don't think i even have the belief that i could speak properly in English now. At the same time, my written english just doesn't seems to be for readers of the lecturers' calibre. It looks more for low class newspaper, reporting gossip. Even such reports are grammatically correct.
Also, i'm neither good at remembering things nor a fan of creative thinking. The expectations are such that knowing the rules and tings that were taught are not enough. One has to be able to weave them together, such that you can distinguish what the old cases said and whether the law was right to begin with. I jus find it so hard to critic things there are in our curriculum and even more so when you are brought up to listen and jus learn. Moreover, from the start, there was much emphasis on the importance of certainty in our law system and Precedence by old cases will help to ensure that. it is an indication that in order to be certain in our advice to clients, we are suppose to substantiate all our theories with case lawS
There is this complaint by the industry and our lecturers that local law students are only good at taking exams, in the event that life is an exam, we will definitely score the best in the whole world. How can they blame us? when all the privileges that they provide (such as exchange program and double degree program) hinges so much upon your grades, and first year grades if i may add. it used to be just guessing what the examiner was looking for and write an exam ans to them. Presently, in order to respond to the industry's feedback and government's call for thinking nation, they add the thinking element into the markng scheme. Other than a respond to the question, one has to think out of the box to achieve a good grade. Those people that claim that students are only exam smart has change the examination system. Such that nowadays, people HAve to be exam smart AS well AS think out of the box. so ultimately, Students can continue with their passive learning by memorising wat kind of response is needed to be "thinking out of the box".
There is endless expectations they have of local students, i'm speaking for other levels as well. As long as it is in the demand in the market, they will inflict it upon us on top of all that they had in the past. Grade us for everything and complain that we will only take things seriously if it is graded. Com'on, with all the additional things that we have to do and in consideration that we only have so much time. isn't the fact that if a subject is examinable the most fundamental question you ask urself, in order to allocate your time for these things?
industries based their preliminary impression of a person by his grades; the school based its confidence in u to take up extra curriculum and to represent it upon his grades too. Does these not call for us students to be extra careful with subjects that are going to be graded? I disagree strongly that grades are everything, but grades still count for many things, if not all.
perhaps people may think i'm whining because i am not doin well currently. Think again. Don't you sometimes feel that the government and sch are merely adding on to our workload? when they suddenly realised that what they have taught for last 2 or 3 decades is wrong, there should be a change. However this change comes in the form of additional things to present system instead of making fundamental changes in the system. it's like cracks on an over pressured dam wall - you patch it up here, cracks start to form elsewhere. eventually the whole system is going to collaspe on u.
i guess after enrolling into law sch, my confidence level has been dipping and it's currently at the new low. I guess as bad as i was, i've never doubt myself so much before. I've always believed that hardwork will never get you to the top, however it'll bring you somewhere near the top. It jus doesn't seems applicable anymore. or is it that i've not been working hard enough? firstly, i lose out in my language, writen or spoken, i just don't have it. I don't think i even have the belief that i could speak properly in English now. At the same time, my written english just doesn't seems to be for readers of the lecturers' calibre. It looks more for low class newspaper, reporting gossip. Even such reports are grammatically correct.
Also, i'm neither good at remembering things nor a fan of creative thinking. The expectations are such that knowing the rules and tings that were taught are not enough. One has to be able to weave them together, such that you can distinguish what the old cases said and whether the law was right to begin with. I jus find it so hard to critic things there are in our curriculum and even more so when you are brought up to listen and jus learn. Moreover, from the start, there was much emphasis on the importance of certainty in our law system and Precedence by old cases will help to ensure that. it is an indication that in order to be certain in our advice to clients, we are suppose to substantiate all our theories with case lawS
There is this complaint by the industry and our lecturers that local law students are only good at taking exams, in the event that life is an exam, we will definitely score the best in the whole world. How can they blame us? when all the privileges that they provide (such as exchange program and double degree program) hinges so much upon your grades, and first year grades if i may add. it used to be just guessing what the examiner was looking for and write an exam ans to them. Presently, in order to respond to the industry's feedback and government's call for thinking nation, they add the thinking element into the markng scheme. Other than a respond to the question, one has to think out of the box to achieve a good grade. Those people that claim that students are only exam smart has change the examination system. Such that nowadays, people HAve to be exam smart AS well AS think out of the box. so ultimately, Students can continue with their passive learning by memorising wat kind of response is needed to be "thinking out of the box".
There is endless expectations they have of local students, i'm speaking for other levels as well. As long as it is in the demand in the market, they will inflict it upon us on top of all that they had in the past. Grade us for everything and complain that we will only take things seriously if it is graded. Com'on, with all the additional things that we have to do and in consideration that we only have so much time. isn't the fact that if a subject is examinable the most fundamental question you ask urself, in order to allocate your time for these things?
industries based their preliminary impression of a person by his grades; the school based its confidence in u to take up extra curriculum and to represent it upon his grades too. Does these not call for us students to be extra careful with subjects that are going to be graded? I disagree strongly that grades are everything, but grades still count for many things, if not all.
perhaps people may think i'm whining because i am not doin well currently. Think again. Don't you sometimes feel that the government and sch are merely adding on to our workload? when they suddenly realised that what they have taught for last 2 or 3 decades is wrong, there should be a change. However this change comes in the form of additional things to present system instead of making fundamental changes in the system. it's like cracks on an over pressured dam wall - you patch it up here, cracks start to form elsewhere. eventually the whole system is going to collaspe on u.
Monday, November 08, 2004
Well, daily entries turn to weekly entries and slowly became monthly entries... soon i guess i'll forget about this whole blog altogether..
will i?
it has been with me for the most significant part of my life thus far..
Anyway, it's important now that i write in proper english rather than how i speak everyday. I've been receiving comments that my assignments had really bad grammar and the sentences were badly structured. I was totally ruined by my bad english. To say it was devastating was qt an understatement - for first time in my life i realised the need for proper english. However, after some thought, there isn't really any choice but learn to speak and write properly for a change. I mean I'll be relying largely on English for the rest of my education, needless to say my career. Even if i happen to go over and practice for Chinese business, i guess there is still a high probability that i've to use ENGLISH, one way or another, i will be in the clutches of ENGLISH, until the day i DIE.
talk about devastating.
By the way, i just watched De-Lovely yesterday. It was great! It's a musical turned movie, i guess that gave a greater room for creativity than it being a musical. The songs were witty; the plot - thou cliche, but still touches hearts. You can see or rather hear that from the sounds of weeping... and the singing, the actors were superb! hahaha
basically the movie swept me off my feet. Paul suggested it and i'm glad i took his suggestion!
I have been sitting here since ten in the morning, had a break at 1330 for lunch that stretched till 2 plus goin to three... and went for a nap at 1630 to 1845.. and surfing the net till now.. i guess it's time to return to my books, or rather laptop..
exams are near, i totally have no confidence..
sigh..
i think i can say goodbye to my overseas exchange programme in year three.. SULKZ
cheers
wr
will i?
it has been with me for the most significant part of my life thus far..
Anyway, it's important now that i write in proper english rather than how i speak everyday. I've been receiving comments that my assignments had really bad grammar and the sentences were badly structured. I was totally ruined by my bad english. To say it was devastating was qt an understatement - for first time in my life i realised the need for proper english. However, after some thought, there isn't really any choice but learn to speak and write properly for a change. I mean I'll be relying largely on English for the rest of my education, needless to say my career. Even if i happen to go over and practice for Chinese business, i guess there is still a high probability that i've to use ENGLISH, one way or another, i will be in the clutches of ENGLISH, until the day i DIE.
talk about devastating.
By the way, i just watched De-Lovely yesterday. It was great! It's a musical turned movie, i guess that gave a greater room for creativity than it being a musical. The songs were witty; the plot - thou cliche, but still touches hearts. You can see or rather hear that from the sounds of weeping... and the singing, the actors were superb! hahaha
basically the movie swept me off my feet. Paul suggested it and i'm glad i took his suggestion!
I have been sitting here since ten in the morning, had a break at 1330 for lunch that stretched till 2 plus goin to three... and went for a nap at 1630 to 1845.. and surfing the net till now.. i guess it's time to return to my books, or rather laptop..
exams are near, i totally have no confidence..
sigh..
i think i can say goodbye to my overseas exchange programme in year three.. SULKZ
cheers
wr
Monday, October 25, 2004
Hrm, not feeling well today.. the kind of sorethroat i had last dec..
jus watch moulin Rouge yesterday (yes, very lagging) but was by chance found de vcd. so jus sat there and watch the pirated vcd after a long day of research in school.. yes, it was saturday, i went back to do research.. explains my illness today, the law library is unbearably cold.. on top of that, it was raining like nobody's business these few days..
Yup, sobbing like a child while i watch Moulin Rouge.. super maluated.. i mean who cries till like that when watching a show.. Paul commented that he really wondered who actually died looking at the way i cry, he said it looks more like my husband died than nicole kidman.. hahaha i guess i was abit too emotional, and out of control.. haven cried so badly since that time.. haven been so touched by a movie since last samurai..
really busy working on my research binder.. seems impossible for me to finish.. but i really feel good looking for cases to support my case. i mean if there weren't any curriculum, i.e. torts and contracts, to juggle with, i don't mind spending whole day in schl to do the research... but have to keep up with curriculum readings and this.. it's really over stretching and overwhelming.. guess the instructors are really doin a good job of stretching our potential..
hey anyway>> i've gotta go for my tuition.. starts at 630, look at the time now..
yupZz, did i mentioned i felt weird resting at home today, like not used to it? it's qt scary...
take care pple, dun fall sick.
cheers
wr
jus watch moulin Rouge yesterday (yes, very lagging) but was by chance found de vcd. so jus sat there and watch the pirated vcd after a long day of research in school.. yes, it was saturday, i went back to do research.. explains my illness today, the law library is unbearably cold.. on top of that, it was raining like nobody's business these few days..
Yup, sobbing like a child while i watch Moulin Rouge.. super maluated.. i mean who cries till like that when watching a show.. Paul commented that he really wondered who actually died looking at the way i cry, he said it looks more like my husband died than nicole kidman.. hahaha i guess i was abit too emotional, and out of control.. haven cried so badly since that time.. haven been so touched by a movie since last samurai..
really busy working on my research binder.. seems impossible for me to finish.. but i really feel good looking for cases to support my case. i mean if there weren't any curriculum, i.e. torts and contracts, to juggle with, i don't mind spending whole day in schl to do the research... but have to keep up with curriculum readings and this.. it's really over stretching and overwhelming.. guess the instructors are really doin a good job of stretching our potential..
hey anyway>> i've gotta go for my tuition.. starts at 630, look at the time now..
yupZz, did i mentioned i felt weird resting at home today, like not used to it? it's qt scary...
take care pple, dun fall sick.
cheers
wr
Monday, October 18, 2004
heYzz
again it's been some time since i blog
hardly have time for myself nowadays
it's jus sch, bf, law club, tutorials, sleep (hardlY)
i really dunnoe what is happening in my life, the sem is ending and i have no idea what am i doing everday.
it's really mundane.
i'll run to catch a ride from my bf's dad's car, will say hi to the mum, super tired, falls asleep in the car, mayb can sustain awhile and read some newspaper. get to sch about half an hour earlier and go to eat breakfast, may drink coffee or apple juice. then have lecture, go eat lunch, do some reading, talk some crap, take care of my law club stuff... goin home, sometmes with tuition...
i'm losing it. losing direction, where am i goin with this?
it is a serious qn, definitely not becos of pms.
i'm force by myself to do somethings that i really do not like, becos it is inevitable in life. but is this rite?
choices,
it's true that in every situation there's definitely choices. and in everything that you do, it's your choice. However, have anyone wondered that some options are as good as having no choice at all? i mean as an outsider you can say "it's ultimately up to you rite?" but if you had the same considerations as the one making the choice, would you still be able to say the same time. If everything is up to my choice, my likings, my priorities, then there'll never be problem in choosing. It's a matter of how selfish you wanna be, it is a matter of how inconsiderate you can make yourself to be, it is a matter of how self centred you are. I am not saying i'm all noble, always taking other's into considerations first before i make my decisions, but my upbringing is such that i do factor other's feelings into my considerations, jus a matter of degree.
well, for the benefit of those who are still reading, it is about my eca, law club. i've some serious problems with people and the way they work in there. from the beginning the leader has made me lost my faith in her being a good leader, not by the way she speaks, nor because of the way she carry herself. perhaps i'm over sensitive, but it is through sutle actions that shows that she has not put herself into the mindset that she is a leader of a group. i cant deny that she has the capabilities, confidence to take up the post, but has she put herself in that position?it's totally different to say that i want to be a leader and to really do it. to take care of the well being of the group. it's a very small incident, however, it's always the small things that count to me.
i have a vp that always wants things her way, suppose to take care of discipline in the club, did her job and really lose me as well. i mean we're all adults, i agree what we've did is off point and wrong. but com'on, do you really want to say this in the club meetings, how will the person feel? surely there are some better ways to communitcate than publicly point it out? when i say she always wants things her way, i don't think she does it on purpose, she jus haven realised what she is doing. I'm sure she has the club's interests at heart, but when people offer their point of view and most people agree with it, i think we jus have to live with it. That is the meaning of tyranny of majority, and at 19 years old, been through council, she seems to have yet to pick up that point in life.
Thirdly, i have this feeling that the group (i wont call it a team as yet) still cant handle problems in a matured way. if you haf a problem with me, look me up, talk to me, we settle it in a matured way. if you keep talking about it during meeting, whether is it hinting or being sacarstic, will jus make things worse. Morever, sacarsm will not bring the group anywhere, what is important is that now we're all in this. what i do might not make ur job more easy, but we work a way out, meet each other halfway. Know what is the problem of your member and address it, don't hint, or call a meeting to talk about things and end up only addressing to that particular member in the club. You're not helping, jus pushing to member away. such things are really delicate human relations issues that are important in a club, unless they learn it themselves. Of cos i can bring it up to them, it'll just look like i'm complaining and everything will be superficial and not be a lesson learnt, not from the bottom of their heart.
i've talked about this with many people, many times. As usual, typical gemini cant make up her mind, after talking to so many people, hearing so many different sides of viewpoint, the more i cant make up my mind, as usual. Anyway, made up my mind to pull through it for a year after talking to a fren. Really put things into perspective after talking to him. Life is never goin to be goin my way, instead of finding an easier way out, might as well brave through it and find yourself a better person at the end of it. Turning around and walk away is so easy, but am i goin to gain anything out of it? as much as i hate to admit it, it doesn't.
i nid to catch up with my work.
the amount of time spent studying few weeks before did not pay off. i got a b- for my first torts test. as in it is not the amount of time you spent studying, it is how you present your ans, how you argue your point and the way you use ur cases. it's all so easy to say, sit there and you wont know what to do. i dont even deserve a low b. that is the painful part. not to mention i was following lectures then, now i really have no idea what is happening in lectures and have yet to be preparing for lectures. been tryin to revise but have been repeating certain stuff that has yet to set in my mind. it is really messed up plus all the tutorials that we have to prepare for. i'm really up to the top...
well, i think i'll stop here, actually wanted to talk about something else, maybe later after my mugging.
cheers
again it's been some time since i blog
hardly have time for myself nowadays
it's jus sch, bf, law club, tutorials, sleep (hardlY)
i really dunnoe what is happening in my life, the sem is ending and i have no idea what am i doing everday.
it's really mundane.
i'll run to catch a ride from my bf's dad's car, will say hi to the mum, super tired, falls asleep in the car, mayb can sustain awhile and read some newspaper. get to sch about half an hour earlier and go to eat breakfast, may drink coffee or apple juice. then have lecture, go eat lunch, do some reading, talk some crap, take care of my law club stuff... goin home, sometmes with tuition...
i'm losing it. losing direction, where am i goin with this?
it is a serious qn, definitely not becos of pms.
i'm force by myself to do somethings that i really do not like, becos it is inevitable in life. but is this rite?
choices,
it's true that in every situation there's definitely choices. and in everything that you do, it's your choice. However, have anyone wondered that some options are as good as having no choice at all? i mean as an outsider you can say "it's ultimately up to you rite?" but if you had the same considerations as the one making the choice, would you still be able to say the same time. If everything is up to my choice, my likings, my priorities, then there'll never be problem in choosing. It's a matter of how selfish you wanna be, it is a matter of how inconsiderate you can make yourself to be, it is a matter of how self centred you are. I am not saying i'm all noble, always taking other's into considerations first before i make my decisions, but my upbringing is such that i do factor other's feelings into my considerations, jus a matter of degree.
well, for the benefit of those who are still reading, it is about my eca, law club. i've some serious problems with people and the way they work in there. from the beginning the leader has made me lost my faith in her being a good leader, not by the way she speaks, nor because of the way she carry herself. perhaps i'm over sensitive, but it is through sutle actions that shows that she has not put herself into the mindset that she is a leader of a group. i cant deny that she has the capabilities, confidence to take up the post, but has she put herself in that position?it's totally different to say that i want to be a leader and to really do it. to take care of the well being of the group. it's a very small incident, however, it's always the small things that count to me.
i have a vp that always wants things her way, suppose to take care of discipline in the club, did her job and really lose me as well. i mean we're all adults, i agree what we've did is off point and wrong. but com'on, do you really want to say this in the club meetings, how will the person feel? surely there are some better ways to communitcate than publicly point it out? when i say she always wants things her way, i don't think she does it on purpose, she jus haven realised what she is doing. I'm sure she has the club's interests at heart, but when people offer their point of view and most people agree with it, i think we jus have to live with it. That is the meaning of tyranny of majority, and at 19 years old, been through council, she seems to have yet to pick up that point in life.
Thirdly, i have this feeling that the group (i wont call it a team as yet) still cant handle problems in a matured way. if you haf a problem with me, look me up, talk to me, we settle it in a matured way. if you keep talking about it during meeting, whether is it hinting or being sacarstic, will jus make things worse. Morever, sacarsm will not bring the group anywhere, what is important is that now we're all in this. what i do might not make ur job more easy, but we work a way out, meet each other halfway. Know what is the problem of your member and address it, don't hint, or call a meeting to talk about things and end up only addressing to that particular member in the club. You're not helping, jus pushing to member away. such things are really delicate human relations issues that are important in a club, unless they learn it themselves. Of cos i can bring it up to them, it'll just look like i'm complaining and everything will be superficial and not be a lesson learnt, not from the bottom of their heart.
i've talked about this with many people, many times. As usual, typical gemini cant make up her mind, after talking to so many people, hearing so many different sides of viewpoint, the more i cant make up my mind, as usual. Anyway, made up my mind to pull through it for a year after talking to a fren. Really put things into perspective after talking to him. Life is never goin to be goin my way, instead of finding an easier way out, might as well brave through it and find yourself a better person at the end of it. Turning around and walk away is so easy, but am i goin to gain anything out of it? as much as i hate to admit it, it doesn't.
i nid to catch up with my work.
the amount of time spent studying few weeks before did not pay off. i got a b- for my first torts test. as in it is not the amount of time you spent studying, it is how you present your ans, how you argue your point and the way you use ur cases. it's all so easy to say, sit there and you wont know what to do. i dont even deserve a low b. that is the painful part. not to mention i was following lectures then, now i really have no idea what is happening in lectures and have yet to be preparing for lectures. been tryin to revise but have been repeating certain stuff that has yet to set in my mind. it is really messed up plus all the tutorials that we have to prepare for. i'm really up to the top...
well, i think i'll stop here, actually wanted to talk about something else, maybe later after my mugging.
cheers
Monday, October 04, 2004
Jus had my 24 hour SLS ppr and a 2 hours tuition... Hmmm
dun really have confidence in my ppr, but hell, i've already tried.. i'm not being easily contented here, but i feel essays are really subjective, especially alot of the things expect you to give ur own views, it's either they like it or they don't... i might really get D for this... but i think tt's de way to learn... i dunnoe if i will be able to see it this way when i get my grades.. dun really feel like thinking about it.
hahah dun be mistaken, i'm not feeling down or wateva due to my ppr.
jus that my whole week end is goin to end soon, and monday is goin to come again... and it's another week
i've gotta revise my contract(terms) and Torts(causation) today, so that i can make something out during tutorial nez week. which reminds me i have library research due nez week and 'meeting the client' on thursday.. i guess it's another busy week for me.. not mentioning my tuition and my law club meeting... on thursday there is an overnite stay in a hotel to meet up with 24th.. darn..
i hate this.
anyway, nothing much has happened, my good fren has talked to me again. wahahhaa who can resist me? :p and all my week was preparation for exam, bf, tuition and more studying..
cant rreally remember what haf i been doin..
rem that the petrol bicycle is being banned and electric bicycle still allowed, taiwanese scolded the whole singapore and that chickens and eggs are available at reasonable price again!
hahhahaha
k, i'm being lame.
i'm really deprive of time...
i think i'll jus stay home de whole day to read up instead of goin to watch movie ALONE,
yes alone. cos my bf is not free on sundays... but i have him for other 6 days, so as i told him, i'm not goin to fight with his heavenly father on sunday.. wahhaha
:P
anyway.. i think i'm goin to bring my barang barang out to the living room.. did i mention i'm growing too fat? all tt eating and sitting down is really killing me...
k k.. study time.. i love studying, gives me direction in life.
ahahaha
btw>> i saw a sign saying "dead slow, living children" in a sch compound yesterday, tot it's qt funny..
wahahahha
regards.
wr
dun really have confidence in my ppr, but hell, i've already tried.. i'm not being easily contented here, but i feel essays are really subjective, especially alot of the things expect you to give ur own views, it's either they like it or they don't... i might really get D for this... but i think tt's de way to learn... i dunnoe if i will be able to see it this way when i get my grades.. dun really feel like thinking about it.
hahah dun be mistaken, i'm not feeling down or wateva due to my ppr.
jus that my whole week end is goin to end soon, and monday is goin to come again... and it's another week
i've gotta revise my contract(terms) and Torts(causation) today, so that i can make something out during tutorial nez week. which reminds me i have library research due nez week and 'meeting the client' on thursday.. i guess it's another busy week for me.. not mentioning my tuition and my law club meeting... on thursday there is an overnite stay in a hotel to meet up with 24th.. darn..
i hate this.
anyway, nothing much has happened, my good fren has talked to me again. wahahhaa who can resist me? :p and all my week was preparation for exam, bf, tuition and more studying..
cant rreally remember what haf i been doin..
rem that the petrol bicycle is being banned and electric bicycle still allowed, taiwanese scolded the whole singapore and that chickens and eggs are available at reasonable price again!
hahhahaha
k, i'm being lame.
i'm really deprive of time...
i think i'll jus stay home de whole day to read up instead of goin to watch movie ALONE,
yes alone. cos my bf is not free on sundays... but i have him for other 6 days, so as i told him, i'm not goin to fight with his heavenly father on sunday.. wahhaha
:P
anyway.. i think i'm goin to bring my barang barang out to the living room.. did i mention i'm growing too fat? all tt eating and sitting down is really killing me...
k k.. study time.. i love studying, gives me direction in life.
ahahaha
btw>> i saw a sign saying "dead slow, living children" in a sch compound yesterday, tot it's qt funny..
wahahahha
regards.
wr
Thursday, September 30, 2004
heyZ.. it's been awhile since i blogged... however, not many people will look at my blog, so there's no stress at all :)
think alot of stuff have been happening throughout this period, gotta slowly update one by one...
well, firstly, for anyone tt's interested, i'm attached. dun think i wanna elaborate too much, jus a really great guy that i think i'm not really good enough for (i'm not being humble here)...
secondly, starting to have papers that count, meaning really had to mug very hard for the pprs, even 5% counts... and had my first tort paper today.. hahaha guess wat, all de talk about not having enough time to finish the paper... i was sitting there 15 mins prior to end of paper, looking at others busy scribling, wondering to myself 'why do they have so much to write'... like 5 min before time's up, i was busy scribling something which does not really appear in the ppr..
when paper ended, though i din write alot, i think i put in enough effort for the ppr. i'm not even thinking about the score..
have the postponed SLS ppr on Sat... my dear lecturer brought the qn to vietnam last week and had difficulty sending it back in time .. it was qt irritating, considering the fact that they were talking about how important it was to hand in assignments in time. becos later in our careers, deadline must be followed really strictly as courts and judges do not give leeway... I mean they even went through the trouble to set up a practice workbin for us to try uploading something just to make sure we could do it... and they themselves have the technical problem... Talk about double standard... should have asked him to write us a report (as we have to write one if we fail to turn up for his lecture...)
thirdly, have extra responsibilities right now.. for all who're letting ur imagination run wild, no i'm not pregnant, i joined law club.. am the social welfare secretary in law club.. alot of meetings, invitation to this and that.. with my tuitionS.. i really wonder if i can juggle them all at once... at this point, i jus wanna say i'm super glad i have a super understanding bf who waited for me till 7 in de evening when his lesson ended at 2, jus to go home with me.. lend me his shoulder to sleep everytime we're travelling.. cos i'm really not sleeping enough.. :p
yeap..
sorta 'quarrel' with my good fren..
really good fren i think..
i think i really neglected the people around me.. growing more and more self-centred as each day passes...
getting really really short tempered nowadays.. really impatient..
but we 'quarrel' not becos of my temper or my lack of patience.. quarrel becos i emailed her telling her i'm attached after a while since we met... she thinks we only go to her cos we haf prob in r/s or have bf stuff to tell her.. i'm qt disappointed.. perhaps our frenship did not really grow with time.. i'm qt disappointed with myself, perhaps i really took her for granted, did not stand in her position to judge if what i was telling her was material enough.. like i did not really pay attention to her as an individual..
i was wrong about how free and easy frenship could be... any kind of relationship needs time and care for it to blossom... without care and attention, think it'll jus wither and die... i tot we had a frenship forged so strong that irregular meetings will be adequate... that we know we'll always be there if something bad happens to each other.. apparently it was not the case..
after this episode, i really dunnoe on what occasion can i look for her? what should i say when i meet her? i have said this to other people before, that if a frenship will require one to think thrice before saying anything, then it's really qt superficial, thinking twice is reasonable.... Din't noe it could apply to us one day..
i should not get too emotional.. it's been awhile since i got too emotional.. and i really dun like the emotional me.. i'm losing touch with that and it is good.. having too much feelings is really not good... be considerate towards other's feelings, but don't have too much feelings urself..
even after you're gone, u cont to teach me... u teach me how to protect myself, by staying in my heart.
be back real soon.
good nite.
wr
think alot of stuff have been happening throughout this period, gotta slowly update one by one...
well, firstly, for anyone tt's interested, i'm attached. dun think i wanna elaborate too much, jus a really great guy that i think i'm not really good enough for (i'm not being humble here)...
secondly, starting to have papers that count, meaning really had to mug very hard for the pprs, even 5% counts... and had my first tort paper today.. hahaha guess wat, all de talk about not having enough time to finish the paper... i was sitting there 15 mins prior to end of paper, looking at others busy scribling, wondering to myself 'why do they have so much to write'... like 5 min before time's up, i was busy scribling something which does not really appear in the ppr..
when paper ended, though i din write alot, i think i put in enough effort for the ppr. i'm not even thinking about the score..
have the postponed SLS ppr on Sat... my dear lecturer brought the qn to vietnam last week and had difficulty sending it back in time .. it was qt irritating, considering the fact that they were talking about how important it was to hand in assignments in time. becos later in our careers, deadline must be followed really strictly as courts and judges do not give leeway... I mean they even went through the trouble to set up a practice workbin for us to try uploading something just to make sure we could do it... and they themselves have the technical problem... Talk about double standard... should have asked him to write us a report (as we have to write one if we fail to turn up for his lecture...)
thirdly, have extra responsibilities right now.. for all who're letting ur imagination run wild, no i'm not pregnant, i joined law club.. am the social welfare secretary in law club.. alot of meetings, invitation to this and that.. with my tuitionS.. i really wonder if i can juggle them all at once... at this point, i jus wanna say i'm super glad i have a super understanding bf who waited for me till 7 in de evening when his lesson ended at 2, jus to go home with me.. lend me his shoulder to sleep everytime we're travelling.. cos i'm really not sleeping enough.. :p
yeap..
sorta 'quarrel' with my good fren..
really good fren i think..
i think i really neglected the people around me.. growing more and more self-centred as each day passes...
getting really really short tempered nowadays.. really impatient..
but we 'quarrel' not becos of my temper or my lack of patience.. quarrel becos i emailed her telling her i'm attached after a while since we met... she thinks we only go to her cos we haf prob in r/s or have bf stuff to tell her.. i'm qt disappointed.. perhaps our frenship did not really grow with time.. i'm qt disappointed with myself, perhaps i really took her for granted, did not stand in her position to judge if what i was telling her was material enough.. like i did not really pay attention to her as an individual..
i was wrong about how free and easy frenship could be... any kind of relationship needs time and care for it to blossom... without care and attention, think it'll jus wither and die... i tot we had a frenship forged so strong that irregular meetings will be adequate... that we know we'll always be there if something bad happens to each other.. apparently it was not the case..
after this episode, i really dunnoe on what occasion can i look for her? what should i say when i meet her? i have said this to other people before, that if a frenship will require one to think thrice before saying anything, then it's really qt superficial, thinking twice is reasonable.... Din't noe it could apply to us one day..
i should not get too emotional.. it's been awhile since i got too emotional.. and i really dun like the emotional me.. i'm losing touch with that and it is good.. having too much feelings is really not good... be considerate towards other's feelings, but don't have too much feelings urself..
even after you're gone, u cont to teach me... u teach me how to protect myself, by staying in my heart.
be back real soon.
good nite.
wr
Sunday, September 12, 2004
hemmmm
din go for dinner with my farmer frenz.
went to study, edit abit of my close memo, read some torts. rather productive compared to stayin at home...
feels much better now :) he said it din haf much impression on him. so i guess i still have a fren
hemm.. eugene says i'm super confused, blur, dunnoe wat i want individual. well, wat to do, when things involve more than one person, it jus gets more complex, in an exponential manner...
it's easier to be alone... with occasional showers of blessings.. haha dun sound right.
i'm goin to blog in my other blog.
talk to u nez time.
wr
din go for dinner with my farmer frenz.
went to study, edit abit of my close memo, read some torts. rather productive compared to stayin at home...
feels much better now :) he said it din haf much impression on him. so i guess i still have a fren
hemm.. eugene says i'm super confused, blur, dunnoe wat i want individual. well, wat to do, when things involve more than one person, it jus gets more complex, in an exponential manner...
it's easier to be alone... with occasional showers of blessings.. haha dun sound right.
i'm goin to blog in my other blog.
talk to u nez time.
wr
Saturday, September 11, 2004
as the heart and mind battles...
hahah never tot i'll be caught again. but i noe this time it's a mild one, i could still get myself out of it. i mean i could see it coming, there's a black hole in front of me, take de plunge or step over it...
looking at the situation, his reactions, my past experience, my fren's experience.. my mind tells me to step over it..
"never let the fear of striking out keep u out of the game.."
i'm a coward
"I'm twisted cuz one side of me is tellin' me that I need to move on
On the other side I wanna break down and cry (ooooh)
I'm twisted cuz one side of me is tellin' me that I need to move on
On the other side I wanna break down and cry (yeah)
When your feeling ain't the same and your body don't want to
But you know gotta let it go cuz the party ain't jumpin' like it used to
Even though this might bruise you
Let it burn
Let it burn
Gotta let it burn
Deep down you know it's best for yourself but you
Hate the thought of her being with someone else
But you know that it's over
We know that it's through
Let it burn
Let it burn
Gotta let it burn" usher- burn
grinz.
i dunno what i'm typing. jus typing
need to get some emotions out before i go back to my books, if not any attempt will jus be in vain
random tots..
"It's the simple things in life we forget
You hear her talkin' but don't hear what she said
Why do you make something so easy so complicated
Searching for what's right in front of your face
But you can't see it" Usher - simple things
stop trying to read into things. been doin that too much. but a girl will always be a girl, think too much... hahah if i could get rid of this as well..
well, i think there goes a fren. think i talked abit too much yesterday. jus rem wat i said at the end of the conversation. hahaha very clever, wat a thing to say... "i nid to get a grip" LOL.. i'm amazed with myself, budden how could u blame a person that is chatting at like 2 am in the morning? well, i guess it makes things abit easier now.. hahaha. ;p
let me see, anymore things to say...
hmmmm
hahaha i think i jus found something very interesting that i said yesterday as well..
:P qt screwed.
k k.. life's much easier now...
thou i dunnoe wat i wan, i think wateva i said has actually decided for me.
life's going to be fine, sunny, occasional showers... and jus me
wr
hahah never tot i'll be caught again. but i noe this time it's a mild one, i could still get myself out of it. i mean i could see it coming, there's a black hole in front of me, take de plunge or step over it...
looking at the situation, his reactions, my past experience, my fren's experience.. my mind tells me to step over it..
"never let the fear of striking out keep u out of the game.."
i'm a coward
"I'm twisted cuz one side of me is tellin' me that I need to move on
On the other side I wanna break down and cry (ooooh)
I'm twisted cuz one side of me is tellin' me that I need to move on
On the other side I wanna break down and cry (yeah)
When your feeling ain't the same and your body don't want to
But you know gotta let it go cuz the party ain't jumpin' like it used to
Even though this might bruise you
Let it burn
Let it burn
Gotta let it burn
Deep down you know it's best for yourself but you
Hate the thought of her being with someone else
But you know that it's over
We know that it's through
Let it burn
Let it burn
Gotta let it burn" usher- burn
grinz.
i dunno what i'm typing. jus typing
need to get some emotions out before i go back to my books, if not any attempt will jus be in vain
random tots..
"It's the simple things in life we forget
You hear her talkin' but don't hear what she said
Why do you make something so easy so complicated
Searching for what's right in front of your face
But you can't see it" Usher - simple things
stop trying to read into things. been doin that too much. but a girl will always be a girl, think too much... hahah if i could get rid of this as well..
well, i think there goes a fren. think i talked abit too much yesterday. jus rem wat i said at the end of the conversation. hahaha very clever, wat a thing to say... "i nid to get a grip" LOL.. i'm amazed with myself, budden how could u blame a person that is chatting at like 2 am in the morning? well, i guess it makes things abit easier now.. hahaha. ;p
let me see, anymore things to say...
hmmmm
hahaha i think i jus found something very interesting that i said yesterday as well..
:P qt screwed.
k k.. life's much easier now...
thou i dunnoe wat i wan, i think wateva i said has actually decided for me.
life's going to be fine, sunny, occasional showers... and jus me
wr
Monday, September 06, 2004
not in a good mood.
stressed out, memories came flooding back, overwhelming me... and i'm super stubborn, cont to listen to all de sappy songs...
i noe it's not the time for me to whine, somehow i think that i dun haf the right to be whining. there's so many things waiting for me to do, to complete, to achieve.. what's there to whine about, what is there to think about? what is there to cry about?
i feel rather lost.
where am i heading? why am i doing all these?
i'm already in this, it's really not up to me to turn back. and i will never turn back.
admitting to defeat is something i don't allow myself to do.
i know i'm goin to pull thru, jus like how i pulled myself thru that period of time... pain is nothing but a process, a phase.. crying will only teach you to be wiser, to learn how to protect yourself from being hurt again...
haha, jus when i tot my life turn for the better, that my fren commented it's been a while since i had been so chirpy. then i realised it never really left, it was at the back of my mind, constantly reminding me of the past.
5 months is not enough.. :) my bestest bud was rite, forget about love, conc on studies, "not hurt enough?" even thou i never told him anything haha
i nid to get a new hobby.. learn how to de-stress. like learning archery? bladding??
i'm sorry about the really bimbotic entry today- i dun mean i haf the looks to be one, but mayb de intellectual level.
wo xin li de gan qing
dou dui ni shuo
ma lu shang tian tian dou zai sai
er yi ge ren tian tian zai deng dai
mei you ni re zi hen hei bai
yuan lai zhe yang jiu shi lian ai
wo xiang yao ni zai wo shen bian
fen xiang wo shen ming de mei yi tian
wo xiang yao tian tian shuo
tian tian shuo
tian tian dui ni shuo....
wo ai ni.
david tao, tian tian
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
well, let me think of something nice to say.. to balance it out.
currently, alot of nice frens ard, mostly guys, or all? hemm
good fren, best fren, bestest fren all happens to be guys
and it happens that they're all from ACS, and they're christian~
hmmm
very interesting rite? so far no one tried to convert me yet, maybe they noe they will never succeed hahaha
well, another very interesting factor is they all haf dream gers already !! haha yeap so we're platonic frens k, mai siao siao.. hahah not many pple can have such achievements rite? i'm goin to like become part of them really soon, judging from the fact that been looking at gers (well i still look at guys), and abit violent, and abit loud. starting to curse and swear... very soon, i might not have any suitors at all, not like i have any now but yeah...
hmmm that's de weirdest thing happening around me... *thinks*
yeah>> and my bestest bud is my neighbour, so refer to earlier entry, he has appeared as an eye candy hahah and i actually reminded myself not to give him my blog add. but since we're now bestest bud, i tot it's only right... self proclaimed anti social, cant really talk person. super good christian, dun even drink (wonder why is he a fren now) hmmm good guy, too bad his taken. hahahaha well, if u gers pay me enough mayb i'll keep track of his love life for u all. LOL :) i nid money ah fren.. mus understand..
good fren is supposedly the hottest guy in law fac, i'm still wondering wat they based on to come up with that... cant really comment too much, cos i still want to keep our friendship. hahaha he's cute but definitely not my kind of cute. that's why we can be good frens~ but den again, this guy can be good frens with any ger, think to make his head abit bigger (ego i mean)
and my best fren is an AGP, like a super blur big brother. ask him about outside law stuff and he can talk to u bout it. but think once it comes back to sch work , he always seems to be abit lost. hahaha think my brother here has a bit too much commitments. did i mention we're in same TG for both LAWR/SLS and Torts/contracts? that's why i became his best fren.. easier to inform him about wat to do. i think after some time, we both realised we're both very lost in sch work. hahaha and this is really not working out very well...
well, i think i can haf my male escort agency rather soon, at the rate i'm goin. it's time i find a partner, den start recruiting members. hahahah well, gers can start contacting me and we can start the ball rolling from there...
think i hafta complete my studies in law, i might hafta use my knowlegde nez time....
in de end, it's all going to be worthwhile
when will it be de end?
wat's going to be worthwhile?
who's goin to judge what's worthwhile or not?
shi shang wu nan shiiiiii
Zhiii pa you xing rennnnnnnn
i wannna fly!!!!!!
fly fly fly!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
stressed out, memories came flooding back, overwhelming me... and i'm super stubborn, cont to listen to all de sappy songs...
i noe it's not the time for me to whine, somehow i think that i dun haf the right to be whining. there's so many things waiting for me to do, to complete, to achieve.. what's there to whine about, what is there to think about? what is there to cry about?
i feel rather lost.
where am i heading? why am i doing all these?
i'm already in this, it's really not up to me to turn back. and i will never turn back.
admitting to defeat is something i don't allow myself to do.
i know i'm goin to pull thru, jus like how i pulled myself thru that period of time... pain is nothing but a process, a phase.. crying will only teach you to be wiser, to learn how to protect yourself from being hurt again...
haha, jus when i tot my life turn for the better, that my fren commented it's been a while since i had been so chirpy. then i realised it never really left, it was at the back of my mind, constantly reminding me of the past.
5 months is not enough.. :) my bestest bud was rite, forget about love, conc on studies, "not hurt enough?" even thou i never told him anything haha
i nid to get a new hobby.. learn how to de-stress. like learning archery? bladding??
i'm sorry about the really bimbotic entry today- i dun mean i haf the looks to be one, but mayb de intellectual level.
wo xin li de gan qing
dou dui ni shuo
ma lu shang tian tian dou zai sai
er yi ge ren tian tian zai deng dai
mei you ni re zi hen hei bai
yuan lai zhe yang jiu shi lian ai
wo xiang yao ni zai wo shen bian
fen xiang wo shen ming de mei yi tian
wo xiang yao tian tian shuo
tian tian shuo
tian tian dui ni shuo....
wo ai ni.
david tao, tian tian
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
well, let me think of something nice to say.. to balance it out.
currently, alot of nice frens ard, mostly guys, or all? hemm
good fren, best fren, bestest fren all happens to be guys
and it happens that they're all from ACS, and they're christian~
hmmm
very interesting rite? so far no one tried to convert me yet, maybe they noe they will never succeed hahaha
well, another very interesting factor is they all haf dream gers already !! haha yeap so we're platonic frens k, mai siao siao.. hahah not many pple can have such achievements rite? i'm goin to like become part of them really soon, judging from the fact that been looking at gers (well i still look at guys), and abit violent, and abit loud. starting to curse and swear... very soon, i might not have any suitors at all, not like i have any now but yeah...
hmmm that's de weirdest thing happening around me... *thinks*
yeah>> and my bestest bud is my neighbour, so refer to earlier entry, he has appeared as an eye candy hahah and i actually reminded myself not to give him my blog add. but since we're now bestest bud, i tot it's only right... self proclaimed anti social, cant really talk person. super good christian, dun even drink (wonder why is he a fren now) hmmm good guy, too bad his taken. hahahaha well, if u gers pay me enough mayb i'll keep track of his love life for u all. LOL :) i nid money ah fren.. mus understand..
good fren is supposedly the hottest guy in law fac, i'm still wondering wat they based on to come up with that... cant really comment too much, cos i still want to keep our friendship. hahaha he's cute but definitely not my kind of cute. that's why we can be good frens~ but den again, this guy can be good frens with any ger, think to make his head abit bigger (ego i mean)
and my best fren is an AGP, like a super blur big brother. ask him about outside law stuff and he can talk to u bout it. but think once it comes back to sch work , he always seems to be abit lost. hahaha think my brother here has a bit too much commitments. did i mention we're in same TG for both LAWR/SLS and Torts/contracts? that's why i became his best fren.. easier to inform him about wat to do. i think after some time, we both realised we're both very lost in sch work. hahaha and this is really not working out very well...
well, i think i can haf my male escort agency rather soon, at the rate i'm goin. it's time i find a partner, den start recruiting members. hahahah well, gers can start contacting me and we can start the ball rolling from there...
think i hafta complete my studies in law, i might hafta use my knowlegde nez time....
in de end, it's all going to be worthwhile
when will it be de end?
wat's going to be worthwhile?
who's goin to judge what's worthwhile or not?
shi shang wu nan shiiiiii
Zhiii pa you xing rennnnnnnn
i wannna fly!!!!!!
fly fly fly!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Friday, September 03, 2004
have qt a number of things to talk about today...
firstly, was reading the newspaper in the morning and came across this article about the SMRT contemplating whether to build railings that cost $5m. due to the fact that too many pple are falling into the track nowadays.
one interesting observation : those that fall into the track are all adults. does that mean that children nowadays are either well taken care of by their parents or just that adults cant really take good care of themselves?
another thing is that don't singaporeans feel embarrass enough to have an annoucement system that tells us to stand behind the yellow line in FOUR languages EVERYTIME a train is coming, like it's not of common sense?
NOW hearing it is not enough, we have to take action to tell the world that we cant really take good care of our own individual self? that we nid physical barriers to stop us from falling off the track?!?
Wat ever happened to all the protesting voices that we are too taken care of? I tot we have an active group of people always calling out for the government to not dictate our lives, not take care of us so well?
As a frequent SMRT commuter, i personally feel that there are a number of reasons why people do fall off the track.
during peak hours, there are really too many people waiting to board the train. at first, everyone will be nice and courteous and stand behind the yellow line, even outside the line that is drawn for people coming how. HOWEVER, once the train began to move into the station, they seems to be attracted to the centre of where the door will be and before you know it, they are like so close to the door even before the train stops. this might not illustrate how a person can fall into the track before the train arrives, but it certainly shows how people don't really think before they act. by bernoulli's principle, the difference in pressure between nearer the moving train to outside will cause people to be 'suck' towards the train (haha my phys teacher gonna be so proud of me~!). Thus by moving beyond the yellow line before the train actually stops is qt a dumb move. and it actually SHOWS how careless adults can be with their own lives. therefore i think they can be qt capable of standing near the track when they feel giddy etc...
at this point, i nid to make it very clear that i have nothing against those victims of such accident, it's purely against the fact of building the railings.
back to the railings that is estimated to cost $5m. ultimately, being a monopoly in singapore (now my econs teacher will come into the picture) that extra cost, either will be subsidise by our ever caring government, or to us, commuters. and it's really people like me, who take the train like twice everyday, going to absorb most of the cost. If you were hoping for the govt to subsidise, start thinking of where that money comes from first. (hint: working adults pay tax)
It's seriously not about the money, it's about how it can be spent in better ways? like upgrading elderly flats which have pipes that are rusty already? i mean, if there were children or old folks falling off the track, yes, i totally agree we shld put railings. But we're talking about adults who are reasonably competent at taking care of themselves here. if they deliberately did so, only a concrete wall can stop them; if they were purely careless, isn't it high time they wake up? i mean, looking at all the previous cases, cant all of us take abit of initiative to take care of ourselves?
another of such incident is the parking problem in joo chiat (the man goin to disrupt church service due to church goers parking in front of his gate)
i'm sure many complaints would have been made to the church before such an outburst take place. and i am sure that the church would have told the congregation about this. it's human nature to wan convenience, i do it myself, but isn't it only polite, to actually ask if u really have to park in front of someone's property? have it actually occur to those inconsiderate people that others might need to drive out anytime during the church service? What if it was an emergency, someone's dying? if the asking had occured before the whole issue occurred, we wouldn't nid to dispatch traffic police to station there every sunday jus to make sure people follow the rules.
but then again, if everyone follow rules and be considerate, i won't have a job in the future...
hahaha
firstly, was reading the newspaper in the morning and came across this article about the SMRT contemplating whether to build railings that cost $5m. due to the fact that too many pple are falling into the track nowadays.
one interesting observation : those that fall into the track are all adults. does that mean that children nowadays are either well taken care of by their parents or just that adults cant really take good care of themselves?
another thing is that don't singaporeans feel embarrass enough to have an annoucement system that tells us to stand behind the yellow line in FOUR languages EVERYTIME a train is coming, like it's not of common sense?
NOW hearing it is not enough, we have to take action to tell the world that we cant really take good care of our own individual self? that we nid physical barriers to stop us from falling off the track?!?
Wat ever happened to all the protesting voices that we are too taken care of? I tot we have an active group of people always calling out for the government to not dictate our lives, not take care of us so well?
As a frequent SMRT commuter, i personally feel that there are a number of reasons why people do fall off the track.
during peak hours, there are really too many people waiting to board the train. at first, everyone will be nice and courteous and stand behind the yellow line, even outside the line that is drawn for people coming how. HOWEVER, once the train began to move into the station, they seems to be attracted to the centre of where the door will be and before you know it, they are like so close to the door even before the train stops. this might not illustrate how a person can fall into the track before the train arrives, but it certainly shows how people don't really think before they act. by bernoulli's principle, the difference in pressure between nearer the moving train to outside will cause people to be 'suck' towards the train (haha my phys teacher gonna be so proud of me~!). Thus by moving beyond the yellow line before the train actually stops is qt a dumb move. and it actually SHOWS how careless adults can be with their own lives. therefore i think they can be qt capable of standing near the track when they feel giddy etc...
at this point, i nid to make it very clear that i have nothing against those victims of such accident, it's purely against the fact of building the railings.
back to the railings that is estimated to cost $5m. ultimately, being a monopoly in singapore (now my econs teacher will come into the picture) that extra cost, either will be subsidise by our ever caring government, or to us, commuters. and it's really people like me, who take the train like twice everyday, going to absorb most of the cost. If you were hoping for the govt to subsidise, start thinking of where that money comes from first. (hint: working adults pay tax)
It's seriously not about the money, it's about how it can be spent in better ways? like upgrading elderly flats which have pipes that are rusty already? i mean, if there were children or old folks falling off the track, yes, i totally agree we shld put railings. But we're talking about adults who are reasonably competent at taking care of themselves here. if they deliberately did so, only a concrete wall can stop them; if they were purely careless, isn't it high time they wake up? i mean, looking at all the previous cases, cant all of us take abit of initiative to take care of ourselves?
another of such incident is the parking problem in joo chiat (the man goin to disrupt church service due to church goers parking in front of his gate)
i'm sure many complaints would have been made to the church before such an outburst take place. and i am sure that the church would have told the congregation about this. it's human nature to wan convenience, i do it myself, but isn't it only polite, to actually ask if u really have to park in front of someone's property? have it actually occur to those inconsiderate people that others might need to drive out anytime during the church service? What if it was an emergency, someone's dying? if the asking had occured before the whole issue occurred, we wouldn't nid to dispatch traffic police to station there every sunday jus to make sure people follow the rules.
but then again, if everyone follow rules and be considerate, i won't have a job in the future...
hahaha
Thursday, September 02, 2004
Yoz~
comtemplating if i shld go out later
i haf another 8 minutes to decide
let's list out the pros and cons..
cons are: i've already been laggin in reading. tml there's torts lecture. my mum wont like it. have been slacking since yesterday. i'll feel bad when i come back.
pro is: there's a brazillian cute guy~! hahaha
k.. looks like goin out is not justified.
mayb i shld jus stay home and study
sigh.
as promised, goin to bring you all de topic of "girls and their petty nature"
actually it's not much. jus alot of my guy frens telling me that gers are really petty, like. too sensitive.. yada yada.
and somehow, i'm not like a ger when i can take insults. i wonder why's dat.
i've got nothing against my own gender here but i do feel that sometimes..
now i've two min left before i go back to work.
i'm goin off..
will attempt the topic again later.
:)
smile.
wr
comtemplating if i shld go out later
i haf another 8 minutes to decide
let's list out the pros and cons..
cons are: i've already been laggin in reading. tml there's torts lecture. my mum wont like it. have been slacking since yesterday. i'll feel bad when i come back.
pro is: there's a brazillian cute guy~! hahaha
k.. looks like goin out is not justified.
mayb i shld jus stay home and study
sigh.
as promised, goin to bring you all de topic of "girls and their petty nature"
actually it's not much. jus alot of my guy frens telling me that gers are really petty, like. too sensitive.. yada yada.
and somehow, i'm not like a ger when i can take insults. i wonder why's dat.
i've got nothing against my own gender here but i do feel that sometimes..
now i've two min left before i go back to work.
i'm goin off..
will attempt the topic again later.
:)
smile.
wr
Wednesday, September 01, 2004
i'm not getting day off tml becos of teachers' day...
cos i'm an undergrad~!
another tell tale sign that "age is catching up"
anyway my eye is hurting, due to the lack of rest, over stressing and wearing contacts all day and nite...
i'm not very kind to them eh?
think if they had a choice they would jus jump out and run away or something..
i'm qt hungry now>> was out since 7 today, went yj to give Teachers' day Prezzie... then ran off before flag raising before every teachers see me... in order to prevent them and myself to fulfill the obligations to engage in little conversation.. which i'm sure they feel that, as much as i do, is the last thing u wanna do like 7 in the morning
and then went nus from there, over shot my destination and dropped at commonwealth instead... apparently there was no frustration or anything, i jus walk over and took a train back.. den like running in auto pilot mode, i walked to the bus stop, and saw my sister who was on the train after mine...
went to sch..
decided to stop by the computer centre to settle my ivle prob once and for all... and.. GUESS WAT? i like the biggest fool in the century... based on the illustration(pictures) i went to the log in page meant for maintenance purposes... so i will not get thru there... stupid. on my part. and the guy was like apologising for the picture.. haha qt nice eh? these really nice pple make my day man.. makes me wanna be nice, which is qt seldom lah...
maroon 5 qt a dirty band eh?
hahahhaha
i like.
anyway>> cont with my boring entry of my little day
met my new best fren (self-acclaimed by him) at FASS canteen coincidentally so got company for eating~ not like i nid lah.. hahahaha as usual, my anti-social self..so ate and went to try to do some reading... TRY.. and my tutorial.. but jus fell flat on the table after half an hour..
think all the lectures and tutorials are not worth mentioning.. how boring can it can? i jus type boring things here... hahaha so not boring enough to enter my blog i guess
haha did i mention the excitement about goin home with my neighbour wore off already?
still fun when i can stay awake, but i'm jus too tired at the end of the day to really entertain someone..
den it's like tuition
den went sun plaza with don and damien. had fun
and decided to put my work aside.. for like few hours..
(in denial)
i'm goin off to sleep..
i shall address the topic "gers and their petty nature tml.."
got some ideas today..
hahaha
hope i got time to update.
cheers
wr
had my first contract tutorial today, i have really interesting instructor~ he smiles when he talks about contract, can see he is really passionate about the job... anyway, concluded that it's really useless to go for contract lecture, and yes, i'm goin to skip the one tomorrow, as i really nid my sleep. but it wont be perpetual.. :p hopefully
hahaha
cos i'm an undergrad~!
another tell tale sign that "age is catching up"
anyway my eye is hurting, due to the lack of rest, over stressing and wearing contacts all day and nite...
i'm not very kind to them eh?
think if they had a choice they would jus jump out and run away or something..
i'm qt hungry now>> was out since 7 today, went yj to give Teachers' day Prezzie... then ran off before flag raising before every teachers see me... in order to prevent them and myself to fulfill the obligations to engage in little conversation.. which i'm sure they feel that, as much as i do, is the last thing u wanna do like 7 in the morning
and then went nus from there, over shot my destination and dropped at commonwealth instead... apparently there was no frustration or anything, i jus walk over and took a train back.. den like running in auto pilot mode, i walked to the bus stop, and saw my sister who was on the train after mine...
went to sch..
decided to stop by the computer centre to settle my ivle prob once and for all... and.. GUESS WAT? i like the biggest fool in the century... based on the illustration(pictures) i went to the log in page meant for maintenance purposes... so i will not get thru there... stupid. on my part. and the guy was like apologising for the picture.. haha qt nice eh? these really nice pple make my day man.. makes me wanna be nice, which is qt seldom lah...
maroon 5 qt a dirty band eh?
hahahhaha
i like.
anyway>> cont with my boring entry of my little day
met my new best fren (self-acclaimed by him) at FASS canteen coincidentally so got company for eating~ not like i nid lah.. hahahaha as usual, my anti-social self..so ate and went to try to do some reading... TRY.. and my tutorial.. but jus fell flat on the table after half an hour..
think all the lectures and tutorials are not worth mentioning.. how boring can it can? i jus type boring things here... hahaha so not boring enough to enter my blog i guess
haha did i mention the excitement about goin home with my neighbour wore off already?
still fun when i can stay awake, but i'm jus too tired at the end of the day to really entertain someone..
den it's like tuition
den went sun plaza with don and damien. had fun
and decided to put my work aside.. for like few hours..
(in denial)
i'm goin off to sleep..
i shall address the topic "gers and their petty nature tml.."
got some ideas today..
hahaha
hope i got time to update.
cheers
wr
had my first contract tutorial today, i have really interesting instructor~ he smiles when he talks about contract, can see he is really passionate about the job... anyway, concluded that it's really useless to go for contract lecture, and yes, i'm goin to skip the one tomorrow, as i really nid my sleep. but it wont be perpetual.. :p hopefully
hahaha
Monday, August 30, 2004
wahahha..
suppose to be doing my reading like... 2 hours agO!!!
wat de heck am i doin still online?!
basically its due to the lack of self discipline
and secondly, it's becos i'm talking to my neighbour who is living across de street
and for those of u who are wondering who de heck is he
he is my new found eye candy that stays across de street directly opposite my house, or flat rather, and his sister and him both reading law first year like me.
so actually, when he decides not to wait for his sister, i get to go home with him! hahah actually, even if he does we still can go home together. somehow or rather he says i'm weird. sulkz. but hahaha eye candy~
k, someone please remind me not to give him my blog add.
anyway>>let me see, anything more interesting happening now in my life? other than the tons of readings dat i've yet to go into..
hahaha.. not really
but realised that i cant really talk to my tort's tutor, as in i cant really talk in my torts tutorial cos i've yet to get used to the pple there.. hope it'll get better nez time..
oh no
gotta go my sister wanna use
nez time...
suppose to be doing my reading like... 2 hours agO!!!
wat de heck am i doin still online?!
basically its due to the lack of self discipline
and secondly, it's becos i'm talking to my neighbour who is living across de street
and for those of u who are wondering who de heck is he
he is my new found eye candy that stays across de street directly opposite my house, or flat rather, and his sister and him both reading law first year like me.
so actually, when he decides not to wait for his sister, i get to go home with him! hahah actually, even if he does we still can go home together. somehow or rather he says i'm weird. sulkz. but hahaha eye candy~
k, someone please remind me not to give him my blog add.
anyway>>let me see, anything more interesting happening now in my life? other than the tons of readings dat i've yet to go into..
hahaha.. not really
but realised that i cant really talk to my tort's tutor, as in i cant really talk in my torts tutorial cos i've yet to get used to the pple there.. hope it'll get better nez time..
oh no
gotta go my sister wanna use
nez time...
Monday, August 16, 2004
i still cannot access my modules in my IVLE!!!!!
i'm officially pissed off with whoever is in charge of it! stupid stupid stupid ..
i cant find out what am i suppose to read!
wat is this man!
even after i sent an email like 2 days ago still no one to rectify the problem?
den what am i suppose to do when de stupid lecturers keep uploading things like they dun nid a break?!
i'm fried.
jus read de pprs, qt interesting stuff they haf on sundays.. or is it i'm getting too boring?
hahaha
there's this report about the MPs gonna go ard collecting suggestions from youths on how they want their country to be govern. one of them said he dun believe that singaporean youths are apathetic when it comes to politics, jus that there is no sufficient avenues for them to voice their opinions.
one thing is that, it took them qt long to realise that?
another is that, i haf a strong feeling, their jus gonna get pple suggesting that we shld haf more rollerblading, skateboarding places, the youths need a break yada yada yada, before you noe it, the dialogue session might jus turn into a complain session... actually, i haf no idea wat is de age range for youth
hahaha 13 to 35?
ok, i think i'm not being fair to our youths..
it's really a good try, perhaps something will come out of it.. instead of youths complaining, and dissing everyone off in online blogs.. i think this is a much more effective avenue, and at least they might see some changes.
if they are hoping to get more youths involved in politics and the shaping of the new singapore, i was thinking mayb they can start like internship for youths aspiring to be a politiciaN? or perhaps they already haf this in place. cos to me it would be interesting to learn how the ministries are run?
well, perhaps the different ministris shld try to work together when coming up with policies.. we all noe that when there's societal problems, it's not only contributed by onli one factor, which comes under the control of one ministry..
anyhow, tt's my 1 cent's worth..
and~
while i'm on de topic of blogging, some chick by de name of xiaxue(or so her blog add claims) got an award fr hongkong for her blog. which the newspaper reported to have been dissing everyone she met off, and her encounters with her exboyfrens.. very interesting world we live in today eh? i mean u get award for openly dissing pple online, being pissed off and vulgar and all that..
from the interview, can tell that she's rather sharp.. from de picture she's rather pretty..
so there goes the theory that pple who appears to be bitter and all that in blogs are ugly freaks who feels that de world owe them a living, shld all be nice and courteous to them becos they are ugly, being considerate for these pple's self esteem.
i'm sayin they are ugly not becos they really look ugly, it's becos they feel ugly and ACT ugly and hate the world for everything, to them, is unfair towards them cos they are ugly.
ppl like this, who cant stop hating the world for everything and do something about themselves, nid two tight slaps, telling them to wake up before their life comes to and end and they look back, recollecting nothing but cursing and swearing at the world for everything that happened to them in life.
or they can jus shoot themselves in the head, if they think the world is such a hopeless place filled with pple who judge them jus becos of looks, save themselves the misery and save others de misery of dealing with their negativity..
do some charity, learn to appreciate the world in a brighter light.. seeing the pple u help smile and laugh and u'll find that u have wasted ur stupid life.
other than complaining pple write sub standard blogs talking about their shopping trips and nitty gritty details bout how loving her bf is, complaining how nokia is designing fones that does serve a purpose, other than dissing ur lecturers about how fierce or authoratative they are,that life is goin to be so much better if you don't hafta study, that the salesperson was so rude to you, that the cute ger in sch is getting so much attention, ur guy teachers are flirting with their students, which i think most probably are subjective views, maybe these pple shld be be brought together and thrown into some poor countries for 3 weeks and learn wat is life. learn how other pple are try to cope with life, and here they are with a computer (some haf more than one), aircon, nice clothes, reasonable good food, great and peaceful country, stressful but semi compulsory education, complaining the world is being unfair to them...
well everyone is entitled to their own views, i wouldn't deny that. but it's jus so irritating when u actually come across blogs that say the world is so bleak cos pple are not getting a grip of their lives... it's sad lah..
well i haf made my comments. and it's probably very biased
but no one will care
hahaha
cos everyone diss everyone in blogs don't they?
i'm jus another blogger
cheers
i'm officially pissed off with whoever is in charge of it! stupid stupid stupid ..
i cant find out what am i suppose to read!
wat is this man!
even after i sent an email like 2 days ago still no one to rectify the problem?
den what am i suppose to do when de stupid lecturers keep uploading things like they dun nid a break?!
i'm fried.
jus read de pprs, qt interesting stuff they haf on sundays.. or is it i'm getting too boring?
hahaha
there's this report about the MPs gonna go ard collecting suggestions from youths on how they want their country to be govern. one of them said he dun believe that singaporean youths are apathetic when it comes to politics, jus that there is no sufficient avenues for them to voice their opinions.
one thing is that, it took them qt long to realise that?
another is that, i haf a strong feeling, their jus gonna get pple suggesting that we shld haf more rollerblading, skateboarding places, the youths need a break yada yada yada, before you noe it, the dialogue session might jus turn into a complain session... actually, i haf no idea wat is de age range for youth
hahaha 13 to 35?
ok, i think i'm not being fair to our youths..
it's really a good try, perhaps something will come out of it.. instead of youths complaining, and dissing everyone off in online blogs.. i think this is a much more effective avenue, and at least they might see some changes.
if they are hoping to get more youths involved in politics and the shaping of the new singapore, i was thinking mayb they can start like internship for youths aspiring to be a politiciaN? or perhaps they already haf this in place. cos to me it would be interesting to learn how the ministries are run?
well, perhaps the different ministris shld try to work together when coming up with policies.. we all noe that when there's societal problems, it's not only contributed by onli one factor, which comes under the control of one ministry..
anyhow, tt's my 1 cent's worth..
and~
while i'm on de topic of blogging, some chick by de name of xiaxue(or so her blog add claims) got an award fr hongkong for her blog. which the newspaper reported to have been dissing everyone she met off, and her encounters with her exboyfrens.. very interesting world we live in today eh? i mean u get award for openly dissing pple online, being pissed off and vulgar and all that..
from the interview, can tell that she's rather sharp.. from de picture she's rather pretty..
so there goes the theory that pple who appears to be bitter and all that in blogs are ugly freaks who feels that de world owe them a living, shld all be nice and courteous to them becos they are ugly, being considerate for these pple's self esteem.
i'm sayin they are ugly not becos they really look ugly, it's becos they feel ugly and ACT ugly and hate the world for everything, to them, is unfair towards them cos they are ugly.
ppl like this, who cant stop hating the world for everything and do something about themselves, nid two tight slaps, telling them to wake up before their life comes to and end and they look back, recollecting nothing but cursing and swearing at the world for everything that happened to them in life.
or they can jus shoot themselves in the head, if they think the world is such a hopeless place filled with pple who judge them jus becos of looks, save themselves the misery and save others de misery of dealing with their negativity..
do some charity, learn to appreciate the world in a brighter light.. seeing the pple u help smile and laugh and u'll find that u have wasted ur stupid life.
other than complaining pple write sub standard blogs talking about their shopping trips and nitty gritty details bout how loving her bf is, complaining how nokia is designing fones that does serve a purpose, other than dissing ur lecturers about how fierce or authoratative they are,that life is goin to be so much better if you don't hafta study, that the salesperson was so rude to you, that the cute ger in sch is getting so much attention, ur guy teachers are flirting with their students, which i think most probably are subjective views, maybe these pple shld be be brought together and thrown into some poor countries for 3 weeks and learn wat is life. learn how other pple are try to cope with life, and here they are with a computer (some haf more than one), aircon, nice clothes, reasonable good food, great and peaceful country, stressful but semi compulsory education, complaining the world is being unfair to them...
well everyone is entitled to their own views, i wouldn't deny that. but it's jus so irritating when u actually come across blogs that say the world is so bleak cos pple are not getting a grip of their lives... it's sad lah..
well i haf made my comments. and it's probably very biased
but no one will care
hahaha
cos everyone diss everyone in blogs don't they?
i'm jus another blogger
cheers
Saturday, August 14, 2004
hahaha i'm qt happy!~
jus sort of finished my first assignment...
i think it's really not up to standard.. but as shervon (my instructor for legal writing) puts it, we're all learning and we're all new to the subject, so no one is expecting you to be fantastic in ur first assignment..
yeah, as long as i hand it up and spend a reasonable amount of time on it ..
i still have like 10 to 15 cases to read to prepare for torts lecture nez week. there goes my weekend..
and i've yet to read up for my SLS... think the only module that yet to haf any reading is contract ..
i'm super lost in sch
no idea wat to bring
no idea how to go about preparing for classes
when they ask us to read, are we suppose to jus read or make some notes..
can i survive without my laptop
wat's de purpose of my laptop anyway?
cant really participate in class cos there are so many smart pple ard, and those who try to sound smart but ask stupid qn. in de end, whenever this particular person raise his/her hand, everyone jus switch off and exchange looks in the LT..
geesh.. wat am i suppose to do with my textbks?
hahaha
other than struggling with the urge to tear it apart.. ;p
i'm qt buried by my books and pprs
and super stressed out by de ppl ard me..
i now only haf a vague idea of wat is jurisdiction, common law, tort, contract, high court, supreme court, court of appeal, subordinate court, legislative, executive, A-G council, yada yada yada and the lists goes on.. and all de big words dat pple use..
they are driving me nuts.
:P
but i'll pull thru!!!!!!
hahahah
i hope
before i become crasy
wahhaha
cheers..
wr
jus sort of finished my first assignment...
i think it's really not up to standard.. but as shervon (my instructor for legal writing) puts it, we're all learning and we're all new to the subject, so no one is expecting you to be fantastic in ur first assignment..
yeah, as long as i hand it up and spend a reasonable amount of time on it ..
i still have like 10 to 15 cases to read to prepare for torts lecture nez week. there goes my weekend..
and i've yet to read up for my SLS... think the only module that yet to haf any reading is contract ..
i'm super lost in sch
no idea wat to bring
no idea how to go about preparing for classes
when they ask us to read, are we suppose to jus read or make some notes..
can i survive without my laptop
wat's de purpose of my laptop anyway?
cant really participate in class cos there are so many smart pple ard, and those who try to sound smart but ask stupid qn. in de end, whenever this particular person raise his/her hand, everyone jus switch off and exchange looks in the LT..
geesh.. wat am i suppose to do with my textbks?
hahaha
other than struggling with the urge to tear it apart.. ;p
i'm qt buried by my books and pprs
and super stressed out by de ppl ard me..
i now only haf a vague idea of wat is jurisdiction, common law, tort, contract, high court, supreme court, court of appeal, subordinate court, legislative, executive, A-G council, yada yada yada and the lists goes on.. and all de big words dat pple use..
they are driving me nuts.
:P
but i'll pull thru!!!!!!
hahahah
i hope
before i become crasy
wahhaha
cheers..
wr
Thursday, August 05, 2004
geesh!!!
been a really busy week~
let me see...
went overnite cycling saturday evening...
saw fireworks on my way to ecp!!!! super nice hahahah great timing yeah?
hrm... had alot of waiting to do.. got there like 8 plus, had some fries and den waited all de way till 11 or 12 before we started cycling.. inclusive of playing ice breakers and collecting bike..
was a whole new exp for me to cycle on de road..
it's really a big big big difference!!!!
hahaha
damn scary, esp i'm so accident prone.. got honked by a taxi at de end of the trail.. hahaha and i noe i was making alot of noise.. wahhaha really damn kia si loh!!!
:p
hahahah oh yeah, saw a really cute guy in my group, nice frenly and all that. and he commented that i dun look like i ever had bf before. this is like de 3rd person saying so.. reason being : i look like those who cannot commit...
i wonder if this is why guys always come to me as good frens and brothers..
hahahaha
but i'm comfortable with status quo, think nothing could be better .. except... :)
oh yeah.. so cycle till like 5 and reach ecp.. not very tiring, except the part about me missing my sleep.. came home ard 7. was so blur that i left without calling becca, and left her like waiting there.. damn man.. and i slept all de way back to ys, so din hear the fone... feel so guilty!!!!!! :P got home, washe up and went to sleep. suppose to wake up at 10 to go give tuition at 11.. but slept all de way to 1252hrs and kept calling my tuition kid.. cos that day i had to get my white long sleeve shirt and black pants for my in-augaration on monday.. and i haf no money.. so i had to go for tuition to get my pay.. but ended up she cancelled tuition.. and i was left stranded, dunnoe who to turn to..
this teaches us not to count our chickens before they hatch... had no choice but to beg borrow from aunt mich.. damn paiseh. only when i have trouble den i msg her.. dunnoe how she sees it lah, but i'm damn uncomfortable with this...
anyhow, had to go all de way to suntec to meet my unker to get it from him instead, since my aunt was in hk working... had lunch at marche (uncle's treat!!) and went to meet niang niang..
our meeting time dragged from 2 all de way to 530.. ultimate.. and 2 pple became 3... hahaha no tt i am complaining lah.. but got my top, bottom and shoes.. aft much hassle and walking ard.. and really felt like killing myself and not turn up for de inaugaration on monday while shopping. yes, i'm one of those few gers who simply cannot stand walking ard aimlessly in shopping centres, hoping to buy something while squeezing through crowds, dat really make me wonder if the whole singapore population is concentrated in town dat day...
however, my mood really swing to de other side right aft i paid for my shoes... and i felt so happY!!! completing my mission!!! hahaha and went to eat at wisma... din really eat since i was meeting dad and mum and sis for roti prata!!!! but paid more den i was suppose to cos i dragged de two poor gers to walk ard with me to get my stuff...
anyhow, monday was qt a serious day, saw our dean, saw my TG (tutorial group) and collected my mailbox keys.. ... did i mention i had to rem ALOT of names.. i'm like.. really bad with names... inaugaration was qt fun.. sat rite in front and doze off when de biggest head was talking.. hahahha first time i dozed off uncontrollably.. wonder if it's him or it's jus me being too tired.. my eyelids simply fell uncontrollably...
hmmm.. woah.. tts only 3 days..
tues went for flag day!!!!
hahaha at first i was really reluctant to go alone!!! den was trying to siam..
budden zy and my ogls too damn cold blooded.. so i was left alone..
aft i got my first 40 cents from an ang mo, i decided to walk to secluded area of somerset to explore, instead of standing a mere 50 steps away from 2 other nus freshie selling flags..
anyway, i walked ard for de sake of exploring, not flaggin! wahhahahah
started flaggin outside a restaurant and fairprice..
really had fun.
even chatted with a couple of donors for some time
whahaha
and i had de heaviest tin when i left, at lunch time. taking into consideration that i was late.. like reached there about 10..
wahhaha
left and de creative talents company called me up on my way to getting my sister a cd..
asked me to go down for an interview de nez day...
in de end i was there later part of de afternoon cos i happened to be free and in town..
was convinced to take some photos on de nez day ..
den i went to give tuition...
today is wednesday.. it is a long day... so i'll cont tml!!
hahaha
cheers
wr
been a really busy week~
let me see...
went overnite cycling saturday evening...
saw fireworks on my way to ecp!!!! super nice hahahah great timing yeah?
hrm... had alot of waiting to do.. got there like 8 plus, had some fries and den waited all de way till 11 or 12 before we started cycling.. inclusive of playing ice breakers and collecting bike..
was a whole new exp for me to cycle on de road..
it's really a big big big difference!!!!
hahaha
damn scary, esp i'm so accident prone.. got honked by a taxi at de end of the trail.. hahaha and i noe i was making alot of noise.. wahhaha really damn kia si loh!!!
:p
hahahah oh yeah, saw a really cute guy in my group, nice frenly and all that. and he commented that i dun look like i ever had bf before. this is like de 3rd person saying so.. reason being : i look like those who cannot commit...
i wonder if this is why guys always come to me as good frens and brothers..
hahahaha
but i'm comfortable with status quo, think nothing could be better .. except... :)
oh yeah.. so cycle till like 5 and reach ecp.. not very tiring, except the part about me missing my sleep.. came home ard 7. was so blur that i left without calling becca, and left her like waiting there.. damn man.. and i slept all de way back to ys, so din hear the fone... feel so guilty!!!!!! :P got home, washe up and went to sleep. suppose to wake up at 10 to go give tuition at 11.. but slept all de way to 1252hrs and kept calling my tuition kid.. cos that day i had to get my white long sleeve shirt and black pants for my in-augaration on monday.. and i haf no money.. so i had to go for tuition to get my pay.. but ended up she cancelled tuition.. and i was left stranded, dunnoe who to turn to..
this teaches us not to count our chickens before they hatch... had no choice but to beg borrow from aunt mich.. damn paiseh. only when i have trouble den i msg her.. dunnoe how she sees it lah, but i'm damn uncomfortable with this...
anyhow, had to go all de way to suntec to meet my unker to get it from him instead, since my aunt was in hk working... had lunch at marche (uncle's treat!!) and went to meet niang niang..
our meeting time dragged from 2 all de way to 530.. ultimate.. and 2 pple became 3... hahaha no tt i am complaining lah.. but got my top, bottom and shoes.. aft much hassle and walking ard.. and really felt like killing myself and not turn up for de inaugaration on monday while shopping. yes, i'm one of those few gers who simply cannot stand walking ard aimlessly in shopping centres, hoping to buy something while squeezing through crowds, dat really make me wonder if the whole singapore population is concentrated in town dat day...
however, my mood really swing to de other side right aft i paid for my shoes... and i felt so happY!!! completing my mission!!! hahaha and went to eat at wisma... din really eat since i was meeting dad and mum and sis for roti prata!!!! but paid more den i was suppose to cos i dragged de two poor gers to walk ard with me to get my stuff...
anyhow, monday was qt a serious day, saw our dean, saw my TG (tutorial group) and collected my mailbox keys.. ... did i mention i had to rem ALOT of names.. i'm like.. really bad with names... inaugaration was qt fun.. sat rite in front and doze off when de biggest head was talking.. hahahha first time i dozed off uncontrollably.. wonder if it's him or it's jus me being too tired.. my eyelids simply fell uncontrollably...
hmmm.. woah.. tts only 3 days..
tues went for flag day!!!!
hahaha at first i was really reluctant to go alone!!! den was trying to siam..
budden zy and my ogls too damn cold blooded.. so i was left alone..
aft i got my first 40 cents from an ang mo, i decided to walk to secluded area of somerset to explore, instead of standing a mere 50 steps away from 2 other nus freshie selling flags..
anyway, i walked ard for de sake of exploring, not flaggin! wahhahahah
started flaggin outside a restaurant and fairprice..
really had fun.
even chatted with a couple of donors for some time
whahaha
and i had de heaviest tin when i left, at lunch time. taking into consideration that i was late.. like reached there about 10..
wahhaha
left and de creative talents company called me up on my way to getting my sister a cd..
asked me to go down for an interview de nez day...
in de end i was there later part of de afternoon cos i happened to be free and in town..
was convinced to take some photos on de nez day ..
den i went to give tuition...
today is wednesday.. it is a long day... so i'll cont tml!!
hahaha
cheers
wr
Friday, July 30, 2004
qt pissed off now.
some idert testing my patience by questioning my integrity.
freaking a*sh*le
yawnn... i jus ate something, so dun think it's rite i go sleep now..
BUT I GOTTA WAKE UP AT LIKE 8?
sigh
matriculation tml..
bahzz
i've done up my table!!!
got really nice pictures and a black board (literaly, a black mounting board) behind! hahaha i think it's super nice...
but will definitely becomes messy once i start sch..
i'll officially be an undergraduate tml....
think it means alot to me..
it shld haf been.
now it all means nuthing..
not anymore..
had a really weird dream in de afternoon! think it's becos i've been sleeping too much.. it's really scary and messed up till i dunnoe wat to make of it.. hahaha but it's qt funny, and qt real. *brrrr*
wearing my spectacles after like.. a mth plus plus?
really not used to it. hahaha having a migraine now.
my og mate called to ask wat to bring tomorrow. haha i never knew i've gotten to de stage of being de "nerdy" kind.. that pple call to ask wat to bring for sch. i tot i used to be those calling others last min to get ready my stuff... de interesting thing is, i actually know wat to bring ! ahahah that's a real change for me..
another week of orientation nez week.. so not so bad, think still can slack for another week... and noe pple all over again.. rather tiring.. entertaining pple. *sigh*
was reading my textbk.. singapore legal system first chapter.. defining national legal system, legal tradition and legal culture.. i was like.. wat de ? de guy says legal culture and legal tradition can be difficult to differentiate and yada yada yada... oh no.. looks like a damn long semester to me..
yeah i think i can go sleep le.. gd nite everyone.
sigh
cheers
wr
some idert testing my patience by questioning my integrity.
freaking a*sh*le
yawnn... i jus ate something, so dun think it's rite i go sleep now..
BUT I GOTTA WAKE UP AT LIKE 8?
sigh
matriculation tml..
bahzz
i've done up my table!!!
got really nice pictures and a black board (literaly, a black mounting board) behind! hahaha i think it's super nice...
but will definitely becomes messy once i start sch..
i'll officially be an undergraduate tml....
think it means alot to me..
it shld haf been.
now it all means nuthing..
not anymore..
had a really weird dream in de afternoon! think it's becos i've been sleeping too much.. it's really scary and messed up till i dunnoe wat to make of it.. hahaha but it's qt funny, and qt real. *brrrr*
wearing my spectacles after like.. a mth plus plus?
really not used to it. hahaha having a migraine now.
my og mate called to ask wat to bring tomorrow. haha i never knew i've gotten to de stage of being de "nerdy" kind.. that pple call to ask wat to bring for sch. i tot i used to be those calling others last min to get ready my stuff... de interesting thing is, i actually know wat to bring ! ahahah that's a real change for me..
another week of orientation nez week.. so not so bad, think still can slack for another week... and noe pple all over again.. rather tiring.. entertaining pple. *sigh*
was reading my textbk.. singapore legal system first chapter.. defining national legal system, legal tradition and legal culture.. i was like.. wat de ? de guy says legal culture and legal tradition can be difficult to differentiate and yada yada yada... oh no.. looks like a damn long semester to me..
yeah i think i can go sleep le.. gd nite everyone.
sigh
cheers
wr
Thursday, July 29, 2004
hahaha
wanted to meet niang niang today.. but end up i had to leave too early, so she decided to meet some other day.
anyhow>> went shopping alone for stuff to put on my table, including 2 foto frames and wanted to get a clock, but de clocks in town too damn ex.. not worthy it..
so yeah. asked my mum to get me one of those from market. hahah more economical..
yeap, got a really nice gift box to keep my precious stuff as well. *grinz*
hmmm den went to help my parents at de stall le...
rather sleepy.
my foot is still hurting, and now even my knee is starting to hurt..
geesh.. i'm starting to panic. cos haf a overnite cycling on friday..
;p Oh NO!
den seems like i cant stand too long..
it's all,
u're my sun shine aft de rain
u're de cure against my fear and my pain
cos i'm losing my mind when u're not ard
it's all
it's all becos of u
baby i
really noe by now
since we met that day
u showed me de way
i felt it den u gave me love i cant describe
how much i feel for u
*
honestly
could it be u and me
like it was before
neither less or more
cos when i close my eyes at nite
i realise that no one else
could take ur place
i still can feel
and it's so real
when u're touching me
kisses endlessly..
*
if i knew how to tell u
wat's on my mind
make u understand
den i'll always be there
right by ur side
u're my sunshine after de rain
u're de cure against my fear and my pain
cos i'm losing my mind
when u're not ard
it's all
it's all becos of u
*yawns*
i'm sleepy~
hahaha
oh yeah was on my leg yeah?
getting crippled liao.. cant get down stairs properly as well
wat de heck.
means i cant go jog.
means i'll cont growing fat
OH NO!
disastrous...
starting sch on monday~
not really looking forward to it cos mondays end at 730.. geesh i think there's some hidden clause somewhere and some students will go home earlier, including me...
sigh
too sleepy
i'm goin off~!!
haf fun pple.
:p
wanted to meet niang niang today.. but end up i had to leave too early, so she decided to meet some other day.
anyhow>> went shopping alone for stuff to put on my table, including 2 foto frames and wanted to get a clock, but de clocks in town too damn ex.. not worthy it..
so yeah. asked my mum to get me one of those from market. hahah more economical..
yeap, got a really nice gift box to keep my precious stuff as well. *grinz*
hmmm den went to help my parents at de stall le...
rather sleepy.
my foot is still hurting, and now even my knee is starting to hurt..
geesh.. i'm starting to panic. cos haf a overnite cycling on friday..
;p Oh NO!
den seems like i cant stand too long..
it's all,
u're my sun shine aft de rain
u're de cure against my fear and my pain
cos i'm losing my mind when u're not ard
it's all
it's all becos of u
baby i
really noe by now
since we met that day
u showed me de way
i felt it den u gave me love i cant describe
how much i feel for u
*
honestly
could it be u and me
like it was before
neither less or more
cos when i close my eyes at nite
i realise that no one else
could take ur place
i still can feel
and it's so real
when u're touching me
kisses endlessly..
*
if i knew how to tell u
wat's on my mind
make u understand
den i'll always be there
right by ur side
u're my sunshine after de rain
u're de cure against my fear and my pain
cos i'm losing my mind
when u're not ard
it's all
it's all becos of u
*yawns*
i'm sleepy~
hahaha
oh yeah was on my leg yeah?
getting crippled liao.. cant get down stairs properly as well
wat de heck.
means i cant go jog.
means i'll cont growing fat
OH NO!
disastrous...
starting sch on monday~
not really looking forward to it cos mondays end at 730.. geesh i think there's some hidden clause somewhere and some students will go home earlier, including me...
sigh
too sleepy
i'm goin off~!!
haf fun pple.
:p
Tuesday, July 27, 2004
i'm super sleepy now~!!!
been lydat since de afternoon...
anyway>> had qt a boring day
packed my cupboards threw another bag of stuff out (plus de other day, i threw out 3 bags altogether)
and stuff my textbks into my cupboard and packed my drawers~
grinz
hmm den brought my sister to her piano exam...
spent half an hour sitting at delifrance reading newspaper..
rather fun lah
but if onli i had more time to finish reading it.
erm other than that i was watching tv and playing some msn game..
really really not productive today
which i planned to use it for reading my texts.
oops
hahaha
anyway i think i wanna go sleep or like conc on trying to interpret my fren's and his ex's conversation.
it's really taxing on de brain manz
sighz
matters of de heart, i can neva understand
cheers
been lydat since de afternoon...
anyway>> had qt a boring day
packed my cupboards threw another bag of stuff out (plus de other day, i threw out 3 bags altogether)
and stuff my textbks into my cupboard and packed my drawers~
grinz
hmm den brought my sister to her piano exam...
spent half an hour sitting at delifrance reading newspaper..
rather fun lah
but if onli i had more time to finish reading it.
erm other than that i was watching tv and playing some msn game..
really really not productive today
which i planned to use it for reading my texts.
oops
hahaha
anyway i think i wanna go sleep or like conc on trying to interpret my fren's and his ex's conversation.
it's really taxing on de brain manz
sighz
matters of de heart, i can neva understand
cheers
Saturday, July 24, 2004
jus got scolded by my parents for staying out late too often...
yeap i noe i'm in de wrong...
staying out late never mean good stuff in de house.. not in any normal house...
dunnoe.. getting scolding from my dad means a whole different thing..
i dun like de disappointed look on his face.
he's really angry this time..
jus this afternoon he drove me to see de physician, now i go out in de middle of de nite to eat supper.
nothing's goin rite...
nothing at all..
sighz..
mayb it's jus me..
i chose the wrong things to do...
nothing's goin rite for me..
wr
yeap i noe i'm in de wrong...
staying out late never mean good stuff in de house.. not in any normal house...
dunnoe.. getting scolding from my dad means a whole different thing..
i dun like de disappointed look on his face.
he's really angry this time..
jus this afternoon he drove me to see de physician, now i go out in de middle of de nite to eat supper.
nothing's goin rite...
nothing at all..
sighz..
mayb it's jus me..
i chose the wrong things to do...
nothing's goin rite for me..
wr
peekaboo~!!
i'm bored.... i'm stuck at home cos i twisted my anklE!!!
watching stupid hong kong show that looks like it's shot in 1990?
hahaha
oh nooooo how am i goinn to get to ecp tml!!!! anyone? hELp?
sigh
i dun dare to go to de "die da yi sheng".... :p
wo pa pa...
think my daddy fetching me there later..
sulkzzz
yawnz
i think i can go sleep again... wait for my ma ma to come home..
lalal blog later..
:)
cheers
i'm bored.... i'm stuck at home cos i twisted my anklE!!!
watching stupid hong kong show that looks like it's shot in 1990?
hahaha
oh nooooo how am i goinn to get to ecp tml!!!! anyone? hELp?
sigh
i dun dare to go to de "die da yi sheng".... :p
wo pa pa...
think my daddy fetching me there later..
sulkzzz
yawnz
i think i can go sleep again... wait for my ma ma to come home..
lalal blog later..
:)
cheers
Friday, July 23, 2004
i jus got home, showered.
neva had i been so drunked. good thing i was in my sister's club, if not i wont noe how to get home... i think i sprain my ankle as a descended from de dance floor jus now... ouch.. anyway, had my fair share of clubbing..
got to knoe qt a number of pple at de club.. and all of them got to noe me as de "xiao mei mei"
hahaha technically yes, i'm rather young there...
try to understand, i'm typing rather ... not soberly here?
LOL..
yeah..
if i'm not sober there wil be alot of stuff dat i wanna do.. .. alot alot.
but i'll always be me.
i'll be guarded...
i had alot of baby sitters today!!! grinz.. from de waiter to de regulars.. even thou it's like de first day i'm officially noen there... it's rather interesting.. i like de warmth i get there.. rather fun.. grinz. but it's a whole new story tml, cos i'l haf to pay if i wanna drink tml yeah?
grinz btw for all ur info: it's ladies nite on thurs for siam supper club, and there's no cover charge. age limit is way above my age, by who cares...
sigh,
it's de most lonely when u're surrounded with de most pple.
i'll be another me when i wake up tml. i noe.
cheers
wr
neva had i been so drunked. good thing i was in my sister's club, if not i wont noe how to get home... i think i sprain my ankle as a descended from de dance floor jus now... ouch.. anyway, had my fair share of clubbing..
got to knoe qt a number of pple at de club.. and all of them got to noe me as de "xiao mei mei"
hahaha technically yes, i'm rather young there...
try to understand, i'm typing rather ... not soberly here?
LOL..
yeah..
if i'm not sober there wil be alot of stuff dat i wanna do.. .. alot alot.
but i'll always be me.
i'll be guarded...
i had alot of baby sitters today!!! grinz.. from de waiter to de regulars.. even thou it's like de first day i'm officially noen there... it's rather interesting.. i like de warmth i get there.. rather fun.. grinz. but it's a whole new story tml, cos i'l haf to pay if i wanna drink tml yeah?
grinz btw for all ur info: it's ladies nite on thurs for siam supper club, and there's no cover charge. age limit is way above my age, by who cares...
sigh,
it's de most lonely when u're surrounded with de most pple.
i'll be another me when i wake up tml. i noe.
cheers
wr
Thursday, July 22, 2004
the question is not whether can i live without men... the question is, must they come in de form of boyfrens?
hahaha
i haf alot of guy frens. and platonic frenship btwn guys and gers do exists. unless de gers wanna be treated in a nicer way, say being send home, opening of doors, basically want guys to be nice. if not, guys and gers can be platonic frenz.
wat a song...
right here waiting by richard marx.
if i see you nez to never, how can we say forever?
oh cant u see it baby? u've got me goin crazy...
but in de end if i'm with you
i'll take de chance...
walked from bishan to amk... to buy something..
something else i came up with...
guys, i jus want to be with de best. unfortunately, there's nothing such as de best kind of guys ard. and de good ones are taken.
think it's not de best time to blog now..
hahaha
i haf alot of guy frens. and platonic frenship btwn guys and gers do exists. unless de gers wanna be treated in a nicer way, say being send home, opening of doors, basically want guys to be nice. if not, guys and gers can be platonic frenz.
wat a song...
right here waiting by richard marx.
if i see you nez to never, how can we say forever?
oh cant u see it baby? u've got me goin crazy...
but in de end if i'm with you
i'll take de chance...
walked from bishan to amk... to buy something..
something else i came up with...
guys, i jus want to be with de best. unfortunately, there's nothing such as de best kind of guys ard. and de good ones are taken.
think it's not de best time to blog now..
Wednesday, July 21, 2004
took wrong train at jurong east... took towards boon lay instead, drop at chinese garden...... tot tt since i had de time and i'm there already, i walked to chinese garden... and walked ard and climb the pagoda... haha too bad de door on de top floor is locked... so can onli look out from de 7th floor...
rather interesting afternoon. walking ard everywhere...
being alone can be interesting too...
act. nuthin much.. dun really wanna go bishan tml..
damn but marina called...
i dunwan to wake up again..
ever again...
hahaha no worries, i will neva take my life. will never.
grinz
cheers.
rather interesting afternoon. walking ard everywhere...
being alone can be interesting too...
act. nuthin much.. dun really wanna go bishan tml..
damn but marina called...
i dunwan to wake up again..
ever again...
hahaha no worries, i will neva take my life. will never.
grinz
cheers.
Monday, July 19, 2004
hmmmmm nothin much to write today...
went to cwp and walk ard.. din find wat i was looking for.
yawnz. read one and a half book.. din get my bks from de ger, cos tenny said he'll find some1 else to sell de bks to me... 365 is too much... :p
hahaha totally braindead, i haf no idea how am i going back to sch in this state of mind.. must be all de alcohol and late nites. i'm becoming retarded. so it's true that alcohol retard growth and stuff lydat.
=p
anyway on my way to cwp, chat with an indian old man. rather interesting. he was eating tobacco (or so he claims, i wonder how pple eat tobacco like sweets) in order to stop smoking...*rather contradicting* hahaha but anyway, it's always interesting to talk to strangers. de things dey tell u...
dun really haf much to blog about.. afraid i might bore u all to death. tt's if anyone's reading
life's getting too mundane!!!!! nothing can spice it up i guess. it's so damn boring... becos it's peaceful.. see, pple are neva contented with wat they haf...
where's my darling brother??? sigh.. din see him online today.
oh no.. de bks are giving me headache!!!!!!
damn.. decisions...
shld i jus take de set that is more complete?
call de ger tml...
3 bks in de list plus 2 not on de list cost 130... i got 7 more to buy!!!
tt's way way way offfff budget i think... or issit? geesh. damn it. i haven yet to see de state de bks are in !
i'm goin to faint
damn!
went to cwp and walk ard.. din find wat i was looking for.
yawnz. read one and a half book.. din get my bks from de ger, cos tenny said he'll find some1 else to sell de bks to me... 365 is too much... :p
hahaha totally braindead, i haf no idea how am i going back to sch in this state of mind.. must be all de alcohol and late nites. i'm becoming retarded. so it's true that alcohol retard growth and stuff lydat.
=p
anyway on my way to cwp, chat with an indian old man. rather interesting. he was eating tobacco (or so he claims, i wonder how pple eat tobacco like sweets) in order to stop smoking...*rather contradicting* hahaha but anyway, it's always interesting to talk to strangers. de things dey tell u...
dun really haf much to blog about.. afraid i might bore u all to death. tt's if anyone's reading
life's getting too mundane!!!!! nothing can spice it up i guess. it's so damn boring... becos it's peaceful.. see, pple are neva contented with wat they haf...
where's my darling brother??? sigh.. din see him online today.
oh no.. de bks are giving me headache!!!!!!
damn.. decisions...
shld i jus take de set that is more complete?
call de ger tml...
3 bks in de list plus 2 not on de list cost 130... i got 7 more to buy!!!
tt's way way way offfff budget i think... or issit? geesh. damn it. i haven yet to see de state de bks are in !
i'm goin to faint
damn!
Thursday, July 15, 2004
zouk is officially off my list of clubbing places.
twice i went, twice bad exp... PACKED with pple, impossible to move ard. de 45 mins i was there, was spent TRYING to move arnd and LOOKing for pple. how fun is that? wat were they thinking when they say it's goin to be happening? happening cos u can walk ard and say "OH HI! u're here! it's so happening huh? i saw XXX jus now near de bar. oh yeah, see u ard later huh..."
hell.
i'm sorry.
qt pissed with de place.
a song on class 95 jus saved de pissed off day....
A WHOLE NEW WORLD!!!
grinz. sweet, walt-disney, fairy-airy.. song...
i wanna be young again, young and naive again...
believe in happily ever after...
believe that everyone is nice...
nothing much to do except fall in love.
met kaiwei for dinner jus now... talked about wat happened in our lives lately...
i dun feel like bloggin today..
cheers.
wr
twice i went, twice bad exp... PACKED with pple, impossible to move ard. de 45 mins i was there, was spent TRYING to move arnd and LOOKing for pple. how fun is that? wat were they thinking when they say it's goin to be happening? happening cos u can walk ard and say "OH HI! u're here! it's so happening huh? i saw XXX jus now near de bar. oh yeah, see u ard later huh..."
hell.
i'm sorry.
qt pissed with de place.
a song on class 95 jus saved de pissed off day....
A WHOLE NEW WORLD!!!
grinz. sweet, walt-disney, fairy-airy.. song...
i wanna be young again, young and naive again...
believe in happily ever after...
believe that everyone is nice...
nothing much to do except fall in love.
met kaiwei for dinner jus now... talked about wat happened in our lives lately...
i dun feel like bloggin today..
cheers.
wr
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)