Blogging Take 2

Although it may appear that I've abandoned my attempt at keeping a blog, I really haven't given up on it completely. I am, however, moving over to a new one while saving this one for talk of our travels and photos as I intended. Okay, okay...I intended to write about life too, but I seemed to lose focus. So the new blog will be more day-to-day life and such if you're interested in following.

http://scrapsofmylife8.blogspot.com/

See you there!

Nothing to say, but a need to say it...

Do you ever feel creatively stumped? I can't even think of a better way to describe it. It doesn't come from a lack of topics or life devoid of action and incidentally moments. No, it's more of an inability to say anything worthwhile about any of it. I've been told the only way to get over it is to just do it - (it being writing in this case). So here goes...

School is underway and the kids are busy once again with homework, soccer, etc. One son has forsaken soccer for cross country but that still leaves him busy with practice every afternoon. Our daughter is immersed in Student Council and presiding over the Junior class. Literally. She's the President. I watch her business in fundraising and Prom planning and Homecoming dress shopping and somehow don't wish I could be doing it all over again too. That time has past. I do like watching her though.

My job these days includes watching a three year old - which also means watching lots and lots of Dora and Diego, his favorite shows. In the afternoons I taxi the boys around to soccer practices and games. I wish I could be more enthusiastic about that...( but hey, it's soccer afterall, not football.)

Speaking of football...BYU is doing well so far this year. I've enjoyed watching a few games. I think having a son up at the Y helps me remember to watch the game myself, knowing it's something he might be doing. Not to play favorites - (although I did GO to BYU also) - I try to be interested in ASU sports as well... and I always have been a loyal Arizonan in some ways.

Aside from Dora and soccer, I have had reason to get out a few times, but lately it seems like I've been in various professional offices a lot - Doctor visits, labwork and even spending a very still 45 minutes having an MRI yesterday. Tomorrow I get to sit in the dentist office for kids, followed by another doctor appointment the next day to discuss the results of the MRI.

Last Saturday I went with Darren to the valley. Now that was a nice day. He had a couple of jobs to bid and needed to go to the Apple Store. We always seem to "need" a trip to the Apple Store! We had Cody with us and picked up our son from ASU taking him to lunch and to Costco before returning home. It was just a quick down and back trip, but I enjoyed the day with my husband and boys and think I could use more of those.

The mental block continues so this blog entry must end...but hey - overall, it's a step forward I hope.

4th of July - in Kansas City

"Everythin's up to date in Kansas City...

We went about as fer as we could go..."

I'm goofy enough to have even played this song from my ipod through the pickup's speakers as we drove into the city. (Nope, none of the other passengers enjoyed it as much as I did, and yep, I'm back to talking about our trip to Nauvoo again, one day at a time, and out of order.) We planned our trip to have a long hard day of driving the first day, which put us in Great Bend, KS sometime well after midnight. The benefit of that was we only had a four hour drive from there to Kansas City on July 4th, thus giving us time to have some Independence Day fun.

We stopped by my aunt and uncle's house in Shawnee first.

After getting some good ideas from them about where to go and

what to do - we did. Go, that is. First, we were all starving by then and we wanted to try out Kansas City barbeque. (We'd heard good things on the Food Channel!) The recommended restaurant

was Jack Stack's Barbeque.

Oh my gosh. I'll just say now - that's one of the reasons I'll be returning to Kansas City someday. It was so good and I'll never be able to look at a 4th of July barbeque the same way again. Here's just a "few" pics...it's hard for me to choose just a few when there's so many.

Jeffrey and Camille, Dakota and Darren all look happy to be there...Jamie doesn't. He's upset we made him order from the kids' menu. (He likes to order the biggest thing on the menu, but experience has taught us he can't finish it.)

We promised him he'd get the same thing but just a little less; he wasn't convinced.

"Come on Jamie...smile, even if it's fake!" :) And he did.

We all had a combination of pork ribs and/or short burnt ends (KC specialty) with a side of cheesy corn bake. So yummy.

(And Jamie ended up well satisfied and happy too.)

Kansas City is apparently famous for all the fountains all over the city. After dinner we took a walking tour of some of the fountains in the downtown area. We took lots of photos and even that was only a tiny fraction of what's out there. What we saw was cool,

and Justice took the

opportunity to raid of few of their coins, adding to his meager funds (until a bum chased him off). The best one was a in a courtyard with fountains shooting up which the kids could run through. We were actually a little surprised at how easily Dakota took to the water. He was drenched in two seconds flat and had the time of his life.

We happened to see some magnificent wildlife in the area...

I'm kidding! The huge elk statue at the Cabella's was pretty cool though. Also the ducks were real, and I thought they made a nice photo.

It was evening by then and we drove to Corporate Woods in Overland Park for the fireworks show. After making our way through a huge crowd of people we found one of the few spots of grass left and sat down to wait for the show to start. It wasn't dark yet but we passed the time pleasantly enough eating cracker jacks and funnel cake (again, yum!), and telling jokes from the Laffy Taffy wrappers. The fireworks started and we saw we couldn't have picked a better place to sit. Our view was up close and awesome - just the way we like it.

I could conclude by saying our day was a blast and it ended with a bang. I could, but I want to also mention that previously I wasn't looking

forward to spending the 4th of July away from home. It's my favorite holiday; I love the parade, going to the various activities, and ending with a cookout and watching the fireworks in our own backyard with friends and family. I figured I'd miss it. Instead, we had a wonderful day together as a family (except for Jeremy and Jonny), enjoying the 4th in a different city . We also enjoyed the fireworks even in spite of the hour plus wait to be able to leave the parking lot afterwards. I guess that gave me understanding of what everyone else goes through on the 4th when they come over to my house. So next year...my sympathies all, - come over anyway and the watermelon is on me! ;)

Perkins Reunion

This last Saturday, July 25th we went out to the Perkins Ranch for a family reunion. My Granddad, Ben Perkins lived at worked on the ranch his entire life. Now he's buried there, not far from the site of the original homestead. Many times when we were around him he was pretty grouchy. But to hear him tell it, "you would be too if you'd worked a dry farm in AZ your whole life." (Okay - I admit that's not an exact quote, but I swear it's close.) Were he still alive, he would have been 100 years this year, so a celebration of his life in the form of a family reunion was in order. Normally it would "just" be my Grandad and Grandma's (Ben and Cecelia's) family - meaning their ten children's families including my Dad's (mine). But this reunion was a little more special as all the descendants from Ben's father and mother were invited.

Rueben and Jane Perkins had thirteen children; my grandfather Ben being their youngest. They raised their family in a very small log home in Clay Springs, AZ less than a 1/4 mile from the home I myself was raised in. Our home had three bedrooms, one and a half bathrooms, and a complete kitchen all with modern appliances, electricity, and running water. (most of the time) My Great Grandmother certainly didn't have it so easy.

As part of the reunion a new little log cabin was dedicated in honor of my great-grandparents, the home they lived in, and the lives they led. My dad and his brothers this cabin the same size and in the exact place the original homestead stood. Although it is the same size, it was not meant to be a replica of the original house, but more of a monument. The modern metal roof shows the intention that this new cabin will remain standing long after we're gone.

I remember checking out the old homestead as a kid. It was in pretty bad shape then, with most of the roof missing, but was nevertheless quite fascinating. A couple of small lean-tos had been added to the cabin - a bedroom and kitchen I believe, but it was still hard to believe a family of thirteen could have occupied it comfortably - (and that was not counting grandchildren that would have come along.) I can remember looking up into the broken and falling loft, wondering about how many of the children would have had to sleep up there. When I was a kid the place looked quite tall and big enough I could imagine the family there. Now, from the perpective of an adult the one room cabin looks absolutely tiny.

As time went on the old cabin became too dangerous in its condition and what was left after the ravages of weather and the mischief of many boys on the ranch was torn down completely. All that remained was the fireplace and chimney. When my dad and uncles built the new cabin they repaired the original chimney using the original stone.

An old trunk and an iron bed remained in the ruins of the house and they too now have been repaired and have found a home again in the new cabin with a fresh coat of black paint and a new patchwork quilt made by my aunts. A cookstove was also added to the cabin and for display purposes, a loaf of my aunt's good homemade bread. It would have been a typical sight (and smell) in Grandma's house.

The family bathtub, however, hangs outside on the wall, and a little gravel path leads the way to another small house outback - fully functional I'm told although I resisted giving it a try. ;)

I don't regret not being born in the days of that original cabin, with it's lack of electricity, in floor heating system, insulation, swamp cooler, and just "room" - to be by oneself if wanted. I guess that's what the cedar trees were good for in addition to the hot fires they'd provide in the winter? I certainly feel lucky I live in a time and place where I can take a hot shower with a quick easy turn of a faucet handle, but I do recognize and appreciate that my ancestors lived a much simpler life and harder life.

Through it all they did raise a family I'm so proud to be a part of. I think my Granddads and Grandmas would be proud too - to see that their work and sweat and love of family and the gospel did pay off in a great and large posterity of good, hardworking, loving people, who are proud of their heritage also. I appreciate family reunions and the opportunities to hear stories about those that came before me, and to learn about the very real people they were. I'm so thankful for the examples they were to us and the traditions they left for us to carry on, including that of having and raising our children in the gospel. And yeah, from the nibbles I saw, a tradition of loving homemade bread too.

Wicked...and I couldn't be Happier

I'm going out of order here, but does it really matter? I just have to talk about one of the most fun nights I've ever had. Last Wenesday my friend Lori, our daughters, and Lori's cousin and my friend Erica all went to the Broadway show - (on Mill Avenue, not Broadway) - Wicked. We had been waiting for months for this day to arrive and were thrilled to be there. I really cannot begin to describe just how Awesome it was was! But I will try...

First, it's just so

fun doing something with great friends whose company you cherish. These women are people who make me laugh and feel happier

just from being in their company.

And I'm just crazy about my daughter Camille. She is so fun to hang out with and although I miss having a little girl, I adore the young lady she is now. We'd already spent a good day of shopping together and were so excited and happy to finally be at the main event.

I had been singing and memorizing the songs from the Wicked Soundtrack for months now so I thought I had a pretty good idea what it was I would be seeing onstage. It was even better than I could have imagined. Within the first couple of scenes my perception of the Galinda character had been so altered I actually wanted to be her! We were entranced by the performances of both the main characters as well as those performing in the other roles. At one point in the first act Elphaba was performing a solo and had such magnificent command of the stage as her voice carried throughout the auditorium I had to turn to Camille and tell her I just felt like crying it was so good. And I nearly did.

Something I wasn't expecting was the humor and all the jokes we heard. Galinda had most of the best lines, including "It seems the artichoke is steamed" and one of my favorites, "Well, there has been much rumor and speculation...innuendo, outuendo..." I'll certainly need to go see Wicked at least three or four times more just to catch all of the Ozisms and tongue in cheek jokes.

Costuming is another thing I notice, having helped with the costuming of three of the last musicals our school has put on. Can I just say WOW!? Every odd shaped outfit down to the buttons was amazing. The hats, wigs, shoes, bustles were all Ozzy crazy; each little detail being so important to the overall look. Galinda's outfits were stunning, of course, and her main gown was simply gorgeous - (nothing "simply" about it really). Camille wants it for her prom dress! Hah!

Toward the end of the show is a song sung by Elphaba and Galinda called "For Good." They agree that each of their lives was better for having known the other. I reflected on that and all the people who have affected my life for good, and in the words of Galinda, "I've had so many..." I think of a High School Government teacher, Mr. F, who shared his knowledge, teaching me so much about the world I lived in then and today. I think of a mentor and friend, C., who inspired and encouraged me to act on interests and talents I'd thought long forgotten. I think of my Grandma and her great example to me of love, unselfishness, faith, and strength through adversity. I think of Starr and her friendship to me in good and difficult days. And then I

wonder about the reverse. Have I been a good teacher, example, and friend to others? Am I doing anything to affect someone's life "for good"?

The first act ends with another inspiring song, "Defying Gravity." After the play my friends and I talked about what it means to defy gravity, - aside from actually flying on a broom which none of us has mastered - yet. (I do admit to being witchy enough to fit the hat and broom however! heehee!) But what we came to realize was that none of us have to be held down or limited by what others expect us to be, or indeed - what we ourselves, believe us to capable of. We can shed negativity and low expectations, and we can fly - figuratively.

I enjoyed this night so much and the company I experienced it with couldn't have been better. I'll continue to sing Wicked songs and quote wicked phrases a long time from now, and I'll never forget the one short night of good Wickedness with good friends.

Are we there yet?

I believe any family who has taken their children on a trip or vacation somewhere has probably at some point in the travels heard the words, "Are we there yet?" In our family that oft heard phrase has been slightly altered to "Are we at the vacation yet?" Never mind that we might already be hundreds of miles from home by that point. I think they've looked at our vacations as more of a destination than an actual ongoing event. I've seen my husband look back through his rearview mirror at certain repeat offenders and firmly declare, "This is it! We're on vacation." He even plans things to see and do along the way in addition to spontaneous stops that make things interesting and enjoyable as we travel. But no, until we reach the ultimate destination of that trip, they don't seem to accept we're "to the vacation."

In thinking about that phrase, "Are we to the vacation yet?," I've asked myself if that is like me - living my life. Have you ever wondered at times when you would get to the happy times, or an easier time of life. I'm sure I have. Do we ever think if we could just get over that hill - perhaps a financial, health-related, or emotional struggle, or just travel on to another state - like reaching the magical ages 14, 16 and so forth, or maybe seeing your kids grow old enough for school, or even to leave home, that then at last you could relax and enjoy arriving... somewhere? And in that search for the happy times - of our imagination perhaps, are we missing wonderful, happy moments which are going on right this minute, today, here and now? It's something to think about.

Meanwhile, we did take the kids on another vacation, leaving home on July 3rd with our main destination being a family reunion held in Nauvoo, Illinois. (Cody was so cute as he kept saying, "I want to go to Naboo.") Here we are traveling Webb-style as we always do, with half the kids in the back where they can lay down and watch videos...and fight? No...never!

The stowaway that doesn't quite look like a Webb is Shadeen Bryant, Cami's friend, who came along to have fun with us. We left fairly early - for us that is, having breakfast of danishes and juice in the pickup.

This is one of those spontaneous stops I mentioned. Sometimes when someone has to go...you have to stop! Take notice of the New Mexico border sign. Although we crossed many other state lines and had better intentions, this ended up being the only one photographed.

The rest of us waited a bit longer until we reached this rest stop with a neat looking window in the rock. It would probably look really cool if the sun was shining down through it just right...

See, there I go again, not appreciating fully or stating that what we did see looked pretty darn awesome!

The last fun stop of the day was in Liberal, KS at 1 Yellowbrick Rd. A trip through Kansas has to include a stop at Dorothy's house, complete with yellow brick road. Dorothy also spent a lot of time searching for something, only to find she had

it with her the entire time.

Darren and I do like to travel, seeing new places and doing different things, but what really makes trips - and our life enjoyable are the people we have with us along the way...our family.

This is what happens when you go to church...

Just kidding. This is what happens when you fall down at church! I was merely walking down the hallway on the way to meetings. My son will tell you I was wearing high heels, - but what do guys know about shoes?! No, they were just slides with a gradual wedge; the incline wasn't more than an inch, and they're quite comfortable shoes which is saying something for me. But somehow my right ankle did twist, I lost my balance and came down hard on the left leg and knee. It hurt bad and I did cry out loud enough for others in the foyer to hear me, but managed not to actually shed tears. Darren came quickly back to me to help. His first main response was to be jealous of how my knee instantly started to bruise. He'd fallen on some floor joists a few days before and hurt his shin quite badly. He even went to the doctor thinking he might have cracked or broken it. He hadn't, but his leg was still very swollen and tender. Not a single bruise though, so it wasn't very obvious to others (and thus less sympathy for him). The same couldn't be said about my leg.

Darren helped me into the chapel and we went on with our meetings. The knee continued to swell and turn dark right before our eyes and I had to be careful of my kids kicking me, of course. Not that they have a habit of just kicking me...haha! But accidental kicks and taps hurt

just as much as intentional knocks. Later at home I put it up and iced it. This photo was taken Sunday night and the bruising is starting to show, but the swelling is already down some.

This photo was taken Monday morning, surprising me by getting uglier overnight, but it was nothing compared to what my leg looked like by Monday afternoon!Nice, huh? I admit - I look at it and have to laugh. I guess that's better than crying.

As the week progressed my leg turned darker and darker and the blood from the broken blood vessels went downhill. I was busy doing laundry and getting prepared for our family vacation so I didn't have time to just sit and prop it up all the time. By the time we left I was sporting a completely purple leg from the knee down. My daughter kept telling me how awful my leg looked and my husband kept taking pictures of it. Ahh, how sweet of him. Now when my leg is back to its pasty white normal color I'll have something to help us remember!

Kitty - I love him a lot, but...

There are few things in life more heartwarming than to be welcomed by a cat. -Tay Hohoff  

I love our cat.  His name is officially Oliver, but I mostly just call him Kitty.  Yeah, I know...so original! We got him over a year ago as a fluffy, soft little kitten.  Now he's a big beautiful orange tabby who walks all around acting like he owns the place.  That's because he thinks he does...

"Cats seem to go on the principle that it never does any harm to ask for what you want."  -Joseph Wood Krutch

My neighbor says Oliver feels completely at home walking into her house and taking a nap under her bed.  Then there was the day I got a call from the school principal.  I heard him introduce himself and groaned inwardly, "What now?" as I misjudged my poor little son in that moment.  The guilty party was our CAT!  He'd been following the kids to school and had been walking right in as if he had every right to be there.  I later wailed to my husband that I was good in school my whole life and yet now in later life I still have to talk to the principal; not just for my kids, but that darn cat too!

"For a Man to truly understand rejection he must first be ignored by a cat."  -Anon

Oliver prefers the men in our family.  Don't ask me why, because with

 the exception of Darren, they sure don't like him.  But given the chance he'll go in the boys' room and nap on their bed. He also enjoys Darren's company and purrs for him as he sits on his lap or on the bed with him. He'll perch on the back of Darren's computer chair while he is working there, or just sit on a nearby table where he can be close to the man.  I'm the one who worries if he doesn't come in at night; I'm the one who invites him in and onto my lap; I'm the one who ensures the cat dish has food and water; I'm the one who will give good kitty neck scratches...but does he like me?  No.  He'll allow me to pet him and scratch him when he's in the mood for it, but he'll forsake me for Darren in a heartbeat and always ups and leaves whether I'm done with him or not!

"I have noticed that what cats most appreciate in a human being is not the ability to produce food which they take for granted--but his or her entertainment value."  -Irish Proverb

Although Oliver comes in to eat and sleep, he generally prefers to stay outside roaming around and doing whatever it is cats do.  We do know he's a good mouser and have caught him in the act of playing or catching them right near the house.  Good kitty!!  But he also goes for the birds and will pounce quite high in the air to bring one down.  Considering we've got a nest in the corner of our house, I'm not quite as excited about that skill.  And then there's the fact that perhaps it's taught him he can tangle with others in the animal kingdom...and thus comes the main point of this story - I love my cat, but...

Oliver got skunked!!

Oh yeah.  It's not been pretty.  And love only goes so far, you know? 

 We love you kitty, but "You're stinking up the whole house!  Go outside!"  (And some in our house don't really love him so they were particularly unhappy when he snuck in a nap on their bed!)   (Hey!  I was getting used to the smell and didn't know he'd come back into the house...get over it, will ya!?)  We've given him three baths and covered him in tomato sauce - (is that really supposed to work?) - but the odor remains.  He can't be in the house for more than a few minutes before someone complains and shows him the door again.  It's a good thing he doesn't take a long time to eat.  I feel sorry for the poor pariah, as he's not very welcome around us right at the moment, but although I do think the odor has decreased in pungency, it's not gone.  When I go to pet him, my hand smells skunky afterwards.  I fear it will be quite some time before he'll smell normal again.  With any luck he'll be tolerable before the snow flies this winter.  

I would have liked to relate this story to something deeper and more meaningful, but the stench in the air killed any brain cells that would have come up with that. Therefore, I leave you this as the only moral of the story I was capable of coming up with...

"When you get in a fight with a skunk, you can't tell who started it." -Lloyd Doggett

And one more thing, lest you think I'm not aware of it...

"There is, incidentally, no way of talking about cats that enables one to come off as a sane person." - Dan Greenberg

Dakota Jack

It's said the first shall be last and the last shall be first.  I guess that makes our baby come first, and indeed he wouldn't have it any other way.  At age 2 and 11 mos. this kid currently believes the universe revolves around him and I don't see his opinion changing on that any time in the near future.  

Speaking of opinions, being part of a big family can mean lots of them - and differing ones.  What we call Cody falls into this category.  His daddy calls him his given name, Dakota or Dakota Jack.  His brothers call him Jack.  His sister and I call him Cody.  And now he has a name for himself:  if asked he'll tell you his name is "Tody Dack Webb" or sometimes, "Baby Tody Dack Webb."

Coming last in our family of eight children - of which seven are boys -  Cody can't help but resemble his brothers.  As an infant we thought he looked the most like his oldest brother Jeffrey, who had just left for his 2-year mission to New York City a month before Cody's birth.   Jeffrey didn't get to meet his little brother for two years and wrote us during the first year that he told others he figured the stories about Cody were all a big conspiracy to make him think he'd been replaced!  Amused, we laughingly agreed with him.  But as Cody has grown up his own face and personality have emerged, distinctive and utterly unique.  His body may yet be small, but his presence in our family is huge.

One of the factors of having a child that comes so far after the other children (six years after Justice) is that while they may only be age 1 or 2  - they believe they are no different than the older ones.  It's either that, or kids are just born technologically savvy these days...or both?   Cody can operate the television, the wii, the computers, ipods, cameras, and cellphones all with a proficiency that frightens and amazes me at the same time.  We can regularly find him sitting back on my bed playing with his daddy's ipod touch and doing things with it I don't even know how to do!  He's reprogramed my camera to Chinese and sent several text messages to Darren from my cellphone.  I don't even know how to do that!!  Someone made the mistake of letting him play with a gameboy some time ago.  We must have thought, "Oh, how cute!" - at the time.  Now...it's a big problem.  It doesn't matter how high or well hidden the boys Gameboy DS' are - Cody will find them and will cry if he's not allowed to play them.  He even called himself Mario - Mario Party for awhile.  Darren and I have tossed around the idea of getting him his own.  I just couldn't see buying such an expensive toy for a (nearly) three year old.  But Darren pointed out that doing so wouldn't really be an issue of spoiling him.  Cody just sees the others have these things and he doesn't understand why he is the only one who doesn't have one.  Actually - he calls Justice's DS "my DS."  So for the sake of family peace, he may soon have to have his own DS too.  I just can't believe myself for doing it...(if I do).

I think he's learning - slowly - that some things belong to others just as some things are his own.  But he still believes everything we all have is there for his own use and pleasure, whether it be someone's hidden toy or snacks, or something out in the open.  He's been potty training in the last few months.  One day, noticing a dark stain I asked, "Cody, did you wet your pants?"  His reply?   "No, wet Justice pants.  Uh huh."  And he nodded.  Sure enough, he was wearing Justice's undies!

Mealtimes are a sorta funny issue where he's concerned, because he has way more than the normal three meals a day.  People in our home eat breakfast and lunch at different times throughout the day depending on when they get up, work schedule, and appetite of course.  Cody believes he should get to eat whenever anyone else is eating, and gets a plate out, telling them "Baby likes sammich" or "I like eggs."   He'll have 2-3 breakfasts and lunches in a day sometimes; often eating more meals (snacks) than I realize.  A recent conversation with rest of the family revealed each of the many courses he had with each of them that day, so I no longer feel guilty if he falls asleep at night before he's had dinner.  And heaven forbid if you don't serve him while feeding yourself (no matter if he's already had breakfast)!  On more than one occasion when the older kids didn't give him a waffle (while they were feeding their own faces), I've come into the kitchen afterwards and found him in the midst of a huge powdery mess, bowel and wisk in hand.  He's looked up with a smile on his face and told me, "Mommy, I making!"  Yeah... he sure was.

His language abilities and vocabulary are still developing, but he's not unintelligible to someone that knows him (me) and so cute when he talks.  And while his English isn't perfect yet, he might be picking up on some Spanish already. Or, at the least, there's a chance he could. Cody loves to watch "Dola" (Dora the Explorer) and "Ego" (Diego) and demands to watch them whether they're on or not.  I got smart and recorded a few episodes on the DVR so he could watch them on demand. (Somehow he always got me to turn it on just as Dora ended!)  I just found out one of the older (unhelpful) kids deleted them.  (Thanks so much!)  

Even after all the gameboy struggles and potty training problems and messy messes, this cute kid has carved an enormous part of our hearts out for himself.  The best thing is when he comes and climbs on me in my chair, squeezes me, and tells me, "Mommy, I lub you!"  Let me tell you...being lubbed by Cody is pretty wonderful.

Pride and Joy

I recently read a friend's semi-jokingly comment on facebook about needing anti-depressants now that her son was in his senior year and thus, his last year of high school football.  She's obviously so proud of him and his accomplishments on the field, as well as just being aware of how much she'll miss watching him when the season is over.  

I think I understand her.  My oldest son Jeffrey played the part of Harold Hill in the Music Man while in High School.  I went to almost all the practices and all but one of the performances and enjoyed every minute of it.  At the end of the final performance as we all gave the cast and pit a standing ovation tears were pouring down my face (as they had before).  The relief of the whole production being over (no more crazy life for a while) was mingled with the deep pride in what my son had done and sadness that I might never experience that kind of joy again.  I was wrong.

Since that time I've had the same overwhelming feeling of pride in my children at other times for other reasons.  And it's shown me how individual they each are.   So, no - we may never again get to watch our child in the starring role of the school musical, but seeing them do well in a lesser role (Chip in Beauty and the Beast), or even finding a way to shine in the background (our daughter in Crazy for You) is every bit as wonderful.  And it doesn't take a musical to get my full attention.  At our third son Jeremy's recent high school graduation we got to see him perform with his band.  Normally he plays the trumpet, but on this

 occasion he played the keyboard.  How cool is it to see a kid you saw start music lessons grow and develop to the point he's able to jam on the keyboard with a band while they accompany the choir; the song appropriately named - "Don't Stop Believing."   Can you spell AWESOME?!!  Plenty of tears rolled down my face that night too!

It makes me wonder about the caution we're given about having too much pride.  Or is this kind of pride acceptable?  How can you not be at such times?  I recall the story of my dad turning cartwheels on the field after my brother hit a grand-slam game winning home run.  Gotta love it!   With that in mind I do intend to write about my kids occasionally - or more than that as the situation demands - and don't be surprised if the pride in them overflows from time to time.  The conclusion I've come to is that I can get away with a little (or a lot) of pride after factoring in all the times I've been annoyed to death by them!  It all evens out...right?