Tuesday, August 24, 2010
Monday, August 23, 2010
: -
somethings that dont happen always,
- having a kid next to you while u are cutting your hair, haha but certainly the interesting part is that he just keep singing and singing while people in the salon/ whatever u call it were laughing .. haha
- while packing/ reorganising my stuffs, while packing through the 'memories' sector, just i recalled back those happy moments with people around me in the past... those gifts, those notes, those photos, those things that bring me back to mystory.
- certainly i suppose last week, was the most happening, happy week after soo long, certainly credits goes to those around me. it's certainly feels great to hang out with u guys/ girls, life would be diff w/o anyone of you guys...
when time passes...
when we were young, we see people older as seniors and teachers, wonder why are they so tall and huge, why do they have different hair colour (white, grey) as us.
when we hit teens, we see all people as friends, not much age group differences, looking and seeking for companionship, wonder about things which happened in daily life and experiences, protecting things precious to us (our homeland, our love ones) deciding the path to take..
when we hit mid, we see family and career as piority, nuturing our kids / younger generations to become what we are or even better, passing down our beliefs, values and ethics ...
when we aged, we see the younger generations as the hope, as the future for the continuation of mankind, 'they are the princes and princess of the country'(they are the most precious and important than anything else).
-----"-----
somethings that dont happen always,
- having a kid next to you while u are cutting your hair, haha but certainly the interesting part is that he just keep singing and singing while people in the salon/ whatever u call it were laughing .. haha
- while packing/ reorganising my stuffs, while packing through the 'memories' sector, just i recalled back those happy moments with people around me in the past... those gifts, those notes, those photos, those things that bring me back to mystory.
- certainly i suppose last week, was the most happening, happy week after soo long, certainly credits goes to those around me. it's certainly feels great to hang out with u guys/ girls, life would be diff w/o anyone of you guys...
when time passes...
when we were young, we see people older as seniors and teachers, wonder why are they so tall and huge, why do they have different hair colour (white, grey) as us.
when we hit teens, we see all people as friends, not much age group differences, looking and seeking for companionship, wonder about things which happened in daily life and experiences, protecting things precious to us (our homeland, our love ones) deciding the path to take..
when we hit mid, we see family and career as piority, nuturing our kids / younger generations to become what we are or even better, passing down our beliefs, values and ethics ...
when we aged, we see the younger generations as the hope, as the future for the continuation of mankind, 'they are the princes and princess of the country'(they are the most precious and important than anything else).
-----"-----
Friday, August 20, 2010
:
good news: got selected for pokka TVC.
bad news:
sigh, last night was terrible, never felt this for such a long time, feeling cold yet hot, wierd dreams all night long ..
damn early slp: 2030
took mr panadol: 0030
i suppose these bugs are 70% cleared from my body. left with < dark reddish yellow phelgm + neck aches + sore throat>.
just then i wonder what could be the cause ?
chinese: prolly due to the exposure of the rain + sun + heaty food (which errr not likely ?)
angmo: due to overwork of the body system which resulted to immune system impaired (which doesnt make sense also?)
supernature?: just recalled this morning that i accidentally kicked an joss stick on the grass area ytd ... (but i suppose there's a reason why people called it a myth?)
saw 3 ambulances with flashing red lights within 5min along road and expressway.. gosh this is scary.
gonnaa bash and clear these 'bugs' out of my body ! grrr damn uncoomfortable and irritating =(
good news: got selected for pokka TVC.
bad news:
sigh, last night was terrible, never felt this for such a long time, feeling cold yet hot, wierd dreams all night long ..
damn early slp: 2030
took mr panadol: 0030
i suppose these bugs are 70% cleared from my body. left with < dark reddish yellow phelgm + neck aches + sore throat>.
just then i wonder what could be the cause ?
chinese: prolly due to the exposure of the rain + sun + heaty food (which errr not likely ?)
angmo: due to overwork of the body system which resulted to immune system impaired (which doesnt make sense also?)
supernature?: just recalled this morning that i accidentally kicked an joss stick on the grass area ytd ... (but i suppose there's a reason why people called it a myth?)
saw 3 ambulances with flashing red lights within 5min along road and expressway.. gosh this is scary.
gonnaa bash and clear these 'bugs' out of my body ! grrr damn uncoomfortable and irritating =(
Thursday, August 19, 2010
: sunny
alright, another fun filled morning - afternoon with jon, cass, hh and joseph! alight from mrt = RUN ! (well people here will know why and how hilarous it is!), go to hh house watch ppl RUN, then finally our turn to RUN ! RUN RUN RUN! haha [e mrt 'sprints', carrying of e 'whisper', freaking 'legs' & e swings 'commercial'! ]
muscle aches + fatigue + feeling weak + feeling hot (even the breath out through the nostrils is warm!) + sore throat = nana poo mr fever is visiting anytime sooonnn -_-"' sigh ! more rest + fluids is needed, tmr will be another busy day .
-----
alright, another fun filled morning - afternoon with jon, cass, hh and joseph! alight from mrt = RUN ! (well people here will know why and how hilarous it is!), go to hh house watch ppl RUN, then finally our turn to RUN ! RUN RUN RUN! haha [e mrt 'sprints', carrying of e 'whisper', freaking 'legs' & e swings 'commercial'! ]
muscle aches + fatigue + feeling weak + feeling hot (even the breath out through the nostrils is warm!) + sore throat = nana poo mr fever is visiting anytime sooonnn -_-"' sigh ! more rest + fluids is needed, tmr will be another busy day .
-----
Tuesday, August 17, 2010
: :)
RRRRRUUUUNNNNNN!!!! great jog! but too bad no sprints < =( / =) ?> welll certainly 'me no like sprinting'!! but ohh welll i don have much choices do i ? hahaha ohhh weellllll take it as a chance to train up something that i am always weak at ?
satisfying meal = happy stomach !
rain rain rain, sigh what's with the weather nowadays ?
----" ----
RRRRRUUUUNNNNNN!!!! great jog! but too bad no sprints < =( / =) ?> welll certainly 'me no like sprinting'!! but ohh welll i don have much choices do i ? hahaha ohhh weellllll take it as a chance to train up something that i am always weak at ?
satisfying meal = happy stomach !
rain rain rain, sigh what's with the weather nowadays ?
----" ----
:
finally some muscle aches from trg ! good sign ? cos shows that i am working hard! hahahha anyway prolly is due to sat beach trg, sun gym = latacte accumulation ? anyway good trg !
just as i ponder, in some process of life,now i lost myself agn, not in the sense of direction but me, myself. ohh well sounded sucky , but what to do?
Apply jobs - interviews - results ... wait, waited, waiting ! =( how nice will life be if the WAITing part is removed. but ohh well part and parcel of life, it's always better then having stopped at the first step i suppose ?
你不知道的事 - wang li hong : meaningful lyrics ! well i suppose you xie shi , bu zhi dao is always better ?
that all folks !
finally some muscle aches from trg ! good sign ? cos shows that i am working hard! hahahha anyway prolly is due to sat beach trg, sun gym = latacte accumulation ? anyway good trg !
just as i ponder, in some process of life,now i lost myself agn, not in the sense of direction but me, myself. ohh well sounded sucky , but what to do?
Apply jobs - interviews - results ... wait, waited, waiting ! =( how nice will life be if the WAITing part is removed. but ohh well part and parcel of life, it's always better then having stopped at the first step i suppose ?
你不知道的事 - wang li hong : meaningful lyrics ! well i suppose you xie shi , bu zhi dao is always better ?
that all folks !
Saturday, August 14, 2010
: idk
13th Aug
today is friday and is 13th of the month.
Camb Mates gathering, nice catching up with one another. =D
bill / person = $13.50
hahah pure coincidence i suppose.
Hi stranger ...
On my way to ACC, at this far end cabin, this middle seat this particular you caught my attention.
On my way back home from Cambodia mates gathering, at this far end cabin, at that middle seat, i turned my head to the left by chance and i saw you again.
On bus trip home from int to hse, just agn i turned my head to the left looking out the window, and then i saw you again, walking back home i supppose...
...interestingly i saw u 3 x a day, pure coincidence agn i suppose...
---------"-----------
12th Aug
Nice G- Shift gathering =) fun and crazy, hopefully there will still be chances for us to meet up again.
that steamboat mini bus, that steamboat shop and that pub without people =x
=D
tired.
------- " -------
13th Aug
today is friday and is 13th of the month.
Camb Mates gathering, nice catching up with one another. =D
bill / person = $13.50
hahah pure coincidence i suppose.
Hi stranger ...
On my way to ACC, at this far end cabin, this middle seat this particular you caught my attention.
On my way back home from Cambodia mates gathering, at this far end cabin, at that middle seat, i turned my head to the left by chance and i saw you again.
On bus trip home from int to hse, just agn i turned my head to the left looking out the window, and then i saw you again, walking back home i supppose...
...interestingly i saw u 3 x a day, pure coincidence agn i suppose...
---------"-----------
12th Aug
Nice G- Shift gathering =) fun and crazy, hopefully there will still be chances for us to meet up again.
that steamboat mini bus, that steamboat shop and that pub without people =x
=D
tired.
------- " -------
Sunday, August 08, 2010
: com on let's go ! high ! =D
NDP 2010! is approaching ! Finally the long awaiting moment =) row 1 column 7 if u have a hard time spoting me =)
alright guys =) G shift final showdown!
Alot out there, people around me wondering why did i choose this path in my ns life, they question me is those sacrifics necessary (those hurdles that present, those extra responsibilities, sats burned, extension of 2 days of service, standing under sun and rain ... blah blah blah). i think if it's something i want to do, and it's possible, i will go ahead with my decision.
some might find me stupid or dumb, well i would say it's just that we see things in different perspective. reasons behind,
1) it's a pride for my country
2) it's something that add on more sparks in my ns 'story'
3) it's something i always wanted to do ever since ndp03( the feelings of standing on the parade ground)
4) it's something that i am confident i will do well in it (performing drills), prolly this will mark an end.
certainly there were alot of problems arise from the start, and i am glad that they were solved along the way. I am glad most of u guys understand the situations and stand with me during problematic times, and i know whenever helps is needed i know u guys will always be around to render that helping hands to me. very much appreciated, as tomorrow mark the end of 'tour' of me with u guys, i want to say, thanks alot for everything (helping, giving me chances to learn as a leader, giving me suggestions, and care as a friend) certainly this phase of life have been written down deeply in my memories, the people, the friends, the buddies, the experiences, the lessons, th knowledge, the teachers.... =)
----- " -----
NDP 2010! is approaching ! Finally the long awaiting moment =) row 1 column 7 if u have a hard time spoting me =)
alright guys =) G shift final showdown!
Alot out there, people around me wondering why did i choose this path in my ns life, they question me is those sacrifics necessary (those hurdles that present, those extra responsibilities, sats burned, extension of 2 days of service, standing under sun and rain ... blah blah blah). i think if it's something i want to do, and it's possible, i will go ahead with my decision.
some might find me stupid or dumb, well i would say it's just that we see things in different perspective. reasons behind,
1) it's a pride for my country
2) it's something that add on more sparks in my ns 'story'
3) it's something i always wanted to do ever since ndp03( the feelings of standing on the parade ground)
4) it's something that i am confident i will do well in it (performing drills), prolly this will mark an end.
certainly there were alot of problems arise from the start, and i am glad that they were solved along the way. I am glad most of u guys understand the situations and stand with me during problematic times, and i know whenever helps is needed i know u guys will always be around to render that helping hands to me. very much appreciated, as tomorrow mark the end of 'tour' of me with u guys, i want to say, thanks alot for everything (helping, giving me chances to learn as a leader, giving me suggestions, and care as a friend) certainly this phase of life have been written down deeply in my memories, the people, the friends, the buddies, the experiences, the lessons, th knowledge, the teachers.... =)
----- " -----
Wednesday, August 04, 2010
: -
Just i realised how stubborn i am when it comes down to job, either lifescience or health science, nothing else. I suppose this is a good thing?
Just 1 interview with that manager make me question myself, Is that the destiny i want ? I know is yes, but how much sacrific will it cost for me to reach there and achieving the bigger picture? and will i give up in the process?
2nd interview with cordlife, quite interesting, lasted for about 30-40mins? however on the long bus ride back the 'what if what if' questions flooded my head. and i wonder . pros and cons of shift work vs pros and cons of office working hrs.
time to run and train ! no time to slack anymore, this year LS NOWC compeititors are really strong, and i mean ya even i am shaken so much in my confident level.
only when i train, i will
be able to give my utmost best to the compeititors,
so it will be a better game for u and me.
be able to produce the best result for the team,
even though the best might not be the best.
be able to play my part well for the team,
so as not to let anyone in the team down.
be able to do those who wasnt given a chance to take part proud,
so as to set a model for them to reach out in the future.
i told myself, therefore i will train hard for myself, and for everyone else.
rock and roll !! trg mode ON!! ;)
Just i realised how stubborn i am when it comes down to job, either lifescience or health science, nothing else. I suppose this is a good thing?
Just 1 interview with that manager make me question myself, Is that the destiny i want ? I know is yes, but how much sacrific will it cost for me to reach there and achieving the bigger picture? and will i give up in the process?
2nd interview with cordlife, quite interesting, lasted for about 30-40mins? however on the long bus ride back the 'what if what if' questions flooded my head. and i wonder . pros and cons of shift work vs pros and cons of office working hrs.
time to run and train ! no time to slack anymore, this year LS NOWC compeititors are really strong, and i mean ya even i am shaken so much in my confident level.
only when i train, i will
be able to give my utmost best to the compeititors,
so it will be a better game for u and me.
be able to produce the best result for the team,
even though the best might not be the best.
be able to play my part well for the team,
so as not to let anyone in the team down.
be able to do those who wasnt given a chance to take part proud,
so as to set a model for them to reach out in the future.
i told myself, therefore i will train hard for myself, and for everyone else.
rock and roll !! trg mode ON!! ;)
Monday, August 02, 2010
: -
PREVIEW 's DOWN ! though right arm and legs were aching like O.O!!! thanks peck for reminder (how much i wanted to enter the cont) !
NICE fireworks saw from marina baysand ! bad things is we were standing there like stone not allow to move, else can turn and shift to see the different angle !
7th day before ORD, RP07M on the 7th lane agn, pure coincidence ? anw guys and girls did a really (Y) job ! =) though there were some 'cock-up' and unfairness... what matter more is doing your best at that point of time. that remind me of something one guy told me: 'giving your best also means a form of respect to your compeititors in the game' haha sigh gonna train for Open Water, trg mode , gg to ON soon ! though much much reminders and efforts needed ...
busy packed schdule throughout since last week, and it gonna drag till i ORD, sooo practically my life is currently revolving around interviews, finds jobs, driving lessons, LS trg, admins + some sai gangs left b4 ORD. not forgeting that this week is surely a stressful week, settling unforeseen situations blaah blah..
PREVIEW 's DOWN ! though right arm and legs were aching like O.O!!! thanks peck for reminder (how much i wanted to enter the cont) !
NICE fireworks saw from marina baysand ! bad things is we were standing there like stone not allow to move, else can turn and shift to see the different angle !
7th day before ORD, RP07M on the 7th lane agn, pure coincidence ? anw guys and girls did a really (Y) job ! =) though there were some 'cock-up' and unfairness... what matter more is doing your best at that point of time. that remind me of something one guy told me: 'giving your best also means a form of respect to your compeititors in the game' haha sigh gonna train for Open Water, trg mode , gg to ON soon ! though much much reminders and efforts needed ...
busy packed schdule throughout since last week, and it gonna drag till i ORD, sooo practically my life is currently revolving around interviews, finds jobs, driving lessons, LS trg, admins + some sai gangs left b4 ORD. not forgeting that this week is surely a stressful week, settling unforeseen situations blaah blah..
Friday, July 30, 2010
: red clouds
first job interview at sgh.
alright was quite pissed when some last min thing clashes with my job interview tmr + on leave, called up the company, and there goes my chance. #$%^&*! so if it's something that 'not that impt' i will get really pissed off. >:(
alright, anger aside.
i wonder what's missing in me that make me a better person? Certainly beside confidence and decisiveness there's something missing.
whenever i tell others about the path i am going in the future they will be like ' :O , REALLY ?!' !! well judging by the cover people thought that i am someone who will have career in sport industry.. -_-"'' !
nxt some old thoughts...
seem that life in r/s isnt easy when things turn rough (not physical rough in that sense)hahhah ??
well we called it immature, overly-possessive, keep wanting to cling onto other party, revenge, unable to let go .. whatever it is, i suppose it's a poison which harm you, yourself and other party.
issit love the cause ? or issit just pure selfishness ? or issit 不服气 ? or issit just habits that need time to kick off ?
certainlty i suppose inter-related to one another ? People always have the wrong concept of 'fairness' hmmm example, when u give $1 you must get back 1 pear ? well for another cases i suppose would be persistance in the wrong way ? you thought by doing this or that, she/he will be back? but very often forgotten that this isnt what she/he wants? ur perfect 'love story' doesnt match with his or hers. sigh.. feelings, chemistry, a mystery... when there's only one hand trying to clap, it's a sign to ____, because they cant clap the same tune anymore.
There was a song lyric,
感情的付出, 不是真心就会有结果
.
.
.
没有一个人, 非要另一个人, 才能过一生
.
.
.
爱若变成了刺
思念也成了痴
也许心碎是爱情最美的样子
- 我知道你很难过 by Jolin Tsai
get some life guys ! it's time to wake up ...
when it's time to let go... let go ...
------- " ------
first job interview at sgh.
alright was quite pissed when some last min thing clashes with my job interview tmr + on leave, called up the company, and there goes my chance. #$%^&*! so if it's something that 'not that impt' i will get really pissed off. >:(
alright, anger aside.
i wonder what's missing in me that make me a better person? Certainly beside confidence and decisiveness there's something missing.
whenever i tell others about the path i am going in the future they will be like ' :O , REALLY ?!' !! well judging by the cover people thought that i am someone who will have career in sport industry.. -_-"'' !
nxt some old thoughts...
seem that life in r/s isnt easy when things turn rough (not physical rough in that sense)hahhah ??
well we called it immature, overly-possessive, keep wanting to cling onto other party, revenge, unable to let go .. whatever it is, i suppose it's a poison which harm you, yourself and other party.
issit love the cause ? or issit just pure selfishness ? or issit 不服气 ? or issit just habits that need time to kick off ?
certainlty i suppose inter-related to one another ? People always have the wrong concept of 'fairness' hmmm example, when u give $1 you must get back 1 pear ? well for another cases i suppose would be persistance in the wrong way ? you thought by doing this or that, she/he will be back? but very often forgotten that this isnt what she/he wants? ur perfect 'love story' doesnt match with his or hers. sigh.. feelings, chemistry, a mystery... when there's only one hand trying to clap, it's a sign to ____, because they cant clap the same tune anymore.
There was a song lyric,
感情的付出, 不是真心就会有结果
.
.
.
没有一个人, 非要另一个人, 才能过一生
.
.
.
爱若变成了刺
思念也成了痴
也许心碎是爱情最美的样子
- 我知道你很难过 by Jolin Tsai
get some life guys ! it's time to wake up ...
when it's time to let go... let go ...
------- " ------
Monday, July 26, 2010
Saturday, July 24, 2010
: :(
alright, today mistakes after mistake, even i myself dont know what i am doing, no 'feelings' eh, i mean the drill feelings. everythings is like so not there, sigh where have it gone to ?
alright, even my encik says: 'yikai you ok anot ? u look xin shi chong chong...' -_-"' but oh well i am ok. really ok but its just that i dont feel like talking much today ? perhaps due to yytd 'mistakes'?, today's humidity?, or prolly due to some unbalance hormones issues ?, or due to some complicated stuffs going through my mind which i dk know how to put it into words? well well hahaha
you need to be more confident, just that confident will have that great differences in you. well this isnt the first person, hopefully it will be the last person telling me that. ohhh welll can someone tell me where to buy confident? sigh if only it can be buy...
unhappy issues aside, on my ride home frm camp, just as i stop beside bus ( full of kids, and all are from my primary sch) oh well then this 2 kids wave and salute at me, i was like -_-"'. oh well after all those 'demoralise stuffs' happened, this actually sorta cheered me up.
alright, today mistakes after mistake, even i myself dont know what i am doing, no 'feelings' eh, i mean the drill feelings. everythings is like so not there, sigh where have it gone to ?
alright, even my encik says: 'yikai you ok anot ? u look xin shi chong chong...' -_-"' but oh well i am ok. really ok but its just that i dont feel like talking much today ? perhaps due to yytd 'mistakes'?, today's humidity?, or prolly due to some unbalance hormones issues ?, or due to some complicated stuffs going through my mind which i dk know how to put it into words? well well hahaha
you need to be more confident, just that confident will have that great differences in you. well this isnt the first person, hopefully it will be the last person telling me that. ohhh welll can someone tell me where to buy confident? sigh if only it can be buy...
unhappy issues aside, on my ride home frm camp, just as i stop beside bus ( full of kids, and all are from my primary sch) oh well then this 2 kids wave and salute at me, i was like -_-"'. oh well after all those 'demoralise stuffs' happened, this actually sorta cheered me up.
Friday, July 23, 2010
: -
this is insane ! i just spent sooooo muchhhh without much thought(within 1 day)! sigh ! *knock knock* what am i doing ?! and now i am falling back to my 'last line of defense' -_-"' sounds like war time uh? everytime i buy somethings which require huge $$ (laptop, bike ... ) i will always make sure i have sufficient buffer before proceeding, but not this time round. Lesson learnt, don do stupid things agn ..
when it's fast, it just took less than 20 mins to reach home =x
r/s? i suppose is one of the root to problems and unhappiness to some. at some point of time, couples do question themselve over certain things.some manage to take a step back and look at the wider view at how things is happening, which should be the best solution and manage to carry on to another stage of r/s with stronger bonds(though some might end up otherwise)...while some are still caught in a dilemma. also there might be some who are persistent to look at the their own narrow point of view. sigh i suppose that's life ya ? deep inside *heart beat- bom po bom po *, is the place where people find their answers.
alright ! well I suppose if it's the right one we will know it ourselves, pro about being single = one can spread his/her 'loves' around to everyone around him/her !! hahahah
----"------
this is insane ! i just spent sooooo muchhhh without much thought(within 1 day)! sigh ! *knock knock* what am i doing ?! and now i am falling back to my 'last line of defense' -_-"' sounds like war time uh? everytime i buy somethings which require huge $$ (laptop, bike ... ) i will always make sure i have sufficient buffer before proceeding, but not this time round. Lesson learnt, don do stupid things agn ..
when it's fast, it just took less than 20 mins to reach home =x
r/s? i suppose is one of the root to problems and unhappiness to some. at some point of time, couples do question themselve over certain things.some manage to take a step back and look at the wider view at how things is happening, which should be the best solution and manage to carry on to another stage of r/s with stronger bonds(though some might end up otherwise)...while some are still caught in a dilemma. also there might be some who are persistent to look at the their own narrow point of view. sigh i suppose that's life ya ? deep inside *heart beat- bom po bom po *, is the place where people find their answers.
alright ! well I suppose if it's the right one we will know it ourselves, pro about being single = one can spread his/her 'loves' around to everyone around him/her !! hahahah
----"------
Thursday, July 22, 2010
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
:
dilemma !!!
sigh, things always happpened when i least expect it to ... calls are finally coming in .. but but but none are interview yet, is like telling you (general selection stage 'passed', kindly wait for semi final (interview))-_-"'
personal gain, career progress in the future, work system, personal interest (big picture).
easy way: lean back, fall back to plans offered , plan later , sounds good ? but still there's certain limitations and considerations.
hard way: enter healthcare working enviroment for experiences, then get a healthscience degree, is like taking one big round and start again (but oh well time to spend some thot reality or passion), but certainly, i stand a greater advantages over biopharm ind than healthsci
so it will be lab jobs vs ind jobs vs hosp jobs
let's see if only considering this 3 kind of job avaliable and other factors (beside the stated ones) are not taken into consideration.
xxxxxx $$ xxx interest xxx location xxx career prog (in future) xxx schdule preferance xxx
lab research: mid xxx low xxx mid xxx low xxx highxxx
biopharm ind: highxxx mid xxx low xxx highxxx mid xxx
health care : low xxx highxxx highxxx mid xxx low xxx
-------------:
that's why when you get this, you wldn get that...
simply say you cant have the best of both world.
play a first come first serve game ? more $$ more talk game ? passion game ? leave it to fate game ?
phone ? change it/ save it ?
spec ? change it/ save it ?
shall straighten out this entangled ropes real soon.
------------:
wah lao eh! 真的是自找麻烦...
dilemma !!!
sigh, things always happpened when i least expect it to ... calls are finally coming in .. but but but none are interview yet, is like telling you (general selection stage 'passed', kindly wait for semi final (interview))-_-"'
personal gain, career progress in the future, work system, personal interest (big picture).
easy way: lean back, fall back to plans offered , plan later , sounds good ? but still there's certain limitations and considerations.
hard way: enter healthcare working enviroment for experiences, then get a healthscience degree, is like taking one big round and start again (but oh well time to spend some thot reality or passion), but certainly, i stand a greater advantages over biopharm ind than healthsci
so it will be lab jobs vs ind jobs vs hosp jobs
let's see if only considering this 3 kind of job avaliable and other factors (beside the stated ones) are not taken into consideration.
xxxxxx $$ xxx interest xxx location xxx career prog (in future) xxx schdule preferance xxx
lab research: mid xxx low xxx mid xxx low xxx highxxx
biopharm ind: highxxx mid xxx low xxx highxxx mid xxx
health care : low xxx highxxx highxxx mid xxx low xxx
-------------:
that's why when you get this, you wldn get that...
simply say you cant have the best of both world.
play a first come first serve game ? more $$ more talk game ? passion game ? leave it to fate game ?
phone ? change it/ save it ?
spec ? change it/ save it ?
shall straighten out this entangled ropes real soon.
------------:
wah lao eh! 真的是自找麻烦...
Monday, July 19, 2010
: yawnzzz
movie early in the morning! thanks to PEG!!!!! ohhhhh goshhh ! alright it's worth to watch, Toy Story 3.
gym, accidently pull rear deltoid muscle. not really severe , just some ache which using that particular part.
for 2 meals i had pasta !=) loves pasta, though it burn quite a big hole there =( ohhh welll once a blue moon. and 1 x big tub ice creams for her bd =)
thanks PYK for driving us around !! =)
i suppose i made the right choice by returning the sglet back to u :), after u returned it to me. Well i suppose u like the design very much, for you to wear it at ur bd celebration night (though i am quite surprise to see tat).
last task completed, final stop to e story. all the best ya? :)
nxt worry is jobs, which one ?
-------- ' ------------
movie early in the morning! thanks to PEG!!!!! ohhhhh goshhh ! alright it's worth to watch, Toy Story 3.
gym, accidently pull rear deltoid muscle. not really severe , just some ache which using that particular part.
for 2 meals i had pasta !=) loves pasta, though it burn quite a big hole there =( ohhh welll once a blue moon. and 1 x big tub ice creams for her bd =)
thanks PYK for driving us around !! =)
i suppose i made the right choice by returning the sglet back to u :), after u returned it to me. Well i suppose u like the design very much, for you to wear it at ur bd celebration night (though i am quite surprise to see tat).
last task completed, final stop to e story. all the best ya? :)
nxt worry is jobs, which one ?
-------- ' ------------
Sunday, July 18, 2010
: disappointment
alright, dozing off while standing. gosh!! this is sooo bad ! bad habit of mine... sigh.
ne2. what to say? i am somehow or rather disappoint with my own performance, 1 x anticiapation mistake during rehers, 1 x mag negligence b4 trg.
---- " -----
idk shld i be happy or worry.
another job offer from my previous faci, but as a research assistant and period of 9 mths. sigh, i would very like to take up this offer. but on another hand i want to go and see the outside world.
hao fan hao fan...
---- " -----
alright, dozing off while standing. gosh!! this is sooo bad ! bad habit of mine... sigh.
ne2. what to say? i am somehow or rather disappoint with my own performance, 1 x anticiapation mistake during rehers, 1 x mag negligence b4 trg.
---- " -----
idk shld i be happy or worry.
another job offer from my previous faci, but as a research assistant and period of 9 mths. sigh, i would very like to take up this offer. but on another hand i want to go and see the outside world.
hao fan hao fan...
---- " -----
Friday, July 16, 2010
: cloudy blue
---- " ----
RAIN RAIN RAIN !
ohhhh goshhhh
i dislike riding in the rain ...
it just sooo troublesome ..
gosh, another job offer, this time is by gary asking me to consider of becoming a OSG staff. sorry to disappoint u, i suppose my answer is more prolly no ba, unless certain things change my mindset.
---- " ----
just when i thought the pain is gone. certain thing happened, adding on and reminds me, what's pain.
when things are given out, it mean that the one receiving it is the owner, there's no need to return back.
there's a different between lending and giving.
just like when feelings are given out, return is not needed back.
not being couple anymore doesnt mean things need to be return back to one another ,if you are not using it anymore then keep it for memory sake instead :) *laugh* if certain things reminds you 'nightmare' then by all means discard it ba . haha
i suppose it's better to keep certain things in the dark. because, by knowing more, it will only give you more unecessary thoughts, which i wldn want that to happen.
Enjoy ur bd celebration ya ?! =) Happy Birthday!
-------- " -------------
---- " ----
RAIN RAIN RAIN !
ohhhh goshhhh
i dislike riding in the rain ...
it just sooo troublesome ..
gosh, another job offer, this time is by gary asking me to consider of becoming a OSG staff. sorry to disappoint u, i suppose my answer is more prolly no ba, unless certain things change my mindset.
---- " ----
just when i thought the pain is gone. certain thing happened, adding on and reminds me, what's pain.
when things are given out, it mean that the one receiving it is the owner, there's no need to return back.
there's a different between lending and giving.
just like when feelings are given out, return is not needed back.
not being couple anymore doesnt mean things need to be return back to one another ,if you are not using it anymore then keep it for memory sake instead :) *laugh* if certain things reminds you 'nightmare' then by all means discard it ba . haha
i suppose it's better to keep certain things in the dark. because, by knowing more, it will only give you more unecessary thoughts, which i wldn want that to happen.
Enjoy ur bd celebration ya ?! =) Happy Birthday!
-------- " -------------
: sigh
so where am i suppose to start ?
alright job applications..
shall look and send 2nd wave applications tmr. hahha kiasu eh (well i just dont wanna waste time rotting around after ord)? hopefully can hear some news from them soon.
went back AHCC to relieve classes, ohh welll even uncle patrick was telling me to become a full timer there. gosh, if i am schooling then should be ok, but well i need the experiences in the relevant field so that i can progress further in what i want to achieve in the future. sorry about that this isnt what i want to achieve in life, though small part of it can be fulfill there :( thanks ava and sli for not forgetting me like after 1yrs gg to 2yrs(for sli) and 3 yrs (for ava)? =)
BOOOKED MY TP ALDY ! 21st SEP , 915am =) com mon ! bring it on ! hahahha
__-__-__"
warning: what's gg to be written down next might cause uneasy feelings to some, for those who are allergic to emo, kindly refrain urself for reading it. -
Life's unfair,
life's always tough for some, whereas for some it's always smooth.
I really hope that this good friend of mine will be alright, and life for her will be better in the future(hopefully from tmr onwards!). 'Dont let those setbacks in life break you down! instead you break them down ya?' When i look at her situations, i saw the reflection of me, family, finacially, studies, work attitude... life is just so sucky and unfair. i mean why?
alright look on the other side, things arent that bad afterall.
i suppose it's like, you have this, but you wouldnt have that kinda rule/balance equation.
Sigh, war at home agn -_-"' so sick and tired of it.
if only all of us have a choice right from birth .. .. if only all of us have pior knowledge of our own future .. but then again who would .....
that's life. :(
-----" ---------
so where am i suppose to start ?
alright job applications..
shall look and send 2nd wave applications tmr. hahha kiasu eh (well i just dont wanna waste time rotting around after ord)? hopefully can hear some news from them soon.
went back AHCC to relieve classes, ohh welll even uncle patrick was telling me to become a full timer there. gosh, if i am schooling then should be ok, but well i need the experiences in the relevant field so that i can progress further in what i want to achieve in the future. sorry about that this isnt what i want to achieve in life, though small part of it can be fulfill there :( thanks ava and sli for not forgetting me like after 1yrs gg to 2yrs(for sli) and 3 yrs (for ava)? =)
BOOOKED MY TP ALDY ! 21st SEP , 915am =) com mon ! bring it on ! hahahha
__-__-__"
warning: what's gg to be written down next might cause uneasy feelings to some, for those who are allergic to emo, kindly refrain urself for reading it. -
Life's unfair,
life's always tough for some, whereas for some it's always smooth.
I really hope that this good friend of mine will be alright, and life for her will be better in the future(hopefully from tmr onwards!). 'Dont let those setbacks in life break you down! instead you break them down ya?' When i look at her situations, i saw the reflection of me, family, finacially, studies, work attitude... life is just so sucky and unfair. i mean why?
alright look on the other side, things arent that bad afterall.
i suppose it's like, you have this, but you wouldnt have that kinda rule/balance equation.
Sigh, war at home agn -_-"' so sick and tired of it.
if only all of us have a choice right from birth .. .. if only all of us have pior knowledge of our own future .. but then again who would .....
that's life. :(
-----" ---------
Thursday, July 15, 2010
: -
goshhh finally 1 call out of so many applications(like 7?) sent ! but suay enuff that at the point of time that person call i was in the parade square! -_-"' lucky i manage to get back.. hahaha
gosh ! everything in my mind now is quick call meeee for INTERVIEW INTERVIEW INTERVIEW !! i need the interview experiences! Hope that i can get the job i want to. Though i understand that i only sent them out like 3 to 4 days ago, they might need sometime to process, but still 'quickkkk ! call me !!! hahahahha'
well that's me, dislike to be left hanging in the air.
watch predator after rehers, show rating: hmm 6.5/10 ba .
at certain images, certian slient moment ... mind wanders .. *knock! wake up*
------ adios. another fulfilling day tmr.
goshhh finally 1 call out of so many applications(like 7?) sent ! but suay enuff that at the point of time that person call i was in the parade square! -_-"' lucky i manage to get back.. hahaha
gosh ! everything in my mind now is quick call meeee for INTERVIEW INTERVIEW INTERVIEW !! i need the interview experiences! Hope that i can get the job i want to. Though i understand that i only sent them out like 3 to 4 days ago, they might need sometime to process, but still 'quickkkk ! call me !!! hahahahha'
well that's me, dislike to be left hanging in the air.
watch predator after rehers, show rating: hmm 6.5/10 ba .
at certain images, certian slient moment ... mind wanders .. *knock! wake up*
------ adios. another fulfilling day tmr.
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
: OO"'
alright i suppose
Started the day with driving lesson in my damn sleepy mode where mistakes were all over the place. was like OMG ! WTH am i doing ??!
next next i realised i always late or didn follow the timing i set for myself. e.g.
I will always set 2 time to go out. e.g. got class at 3pm, travel time: 1hr15mins, buffer time: 30mins, go get unimportant stuffs + lepa(relax): 1hr. soooo by right i shld be leaving hse at like 1215?? then agn i always fall back to the die die then go timing which is like 130pm ??!! hooollyyy fishhHHh ! which means the 'unimportant' tasking will always be left undone .. :( sighhhh
up next ... something which happppeennn outt of the blue !!
as usual, seeing those ppl who is conducting survey, I will always SIAM ! but then again if they manage to approach me in time, i will give them that little 'time' if i am not in a rush.
Who knows, after SIAMMing sooo many, there was one who appear out of no where! then i told her 'sorry miss, i am in a rush' (which i really in the rush). well then the pretty lady (wahh really quite! damn wasted !jkjk) 'i just need that few sec' (as if she knew that was gg to come out of my mouth beforehand)... well then she said 'we are looking male models, would like to ask if you are interested, i know you are in a hurry, here's my namecard, take your time to consider' and welll i was like O_O"'' thinking ' siao ! i think your eyes got stamps on sioh!' me sooo skinny .... dot .. dot are you guys in need of skinny models ?? if you guys in need of skinny models then i dont mind trying ! wahhahaha lol jkjk
relieve class, wtfish chapalan class, all mixed level, i was like 'HOW TO TEACH and TEST ??!!' 3 to 4 diff level leh ... -_-"' sigh sigh. oh welll wat to dooo, lucky it's not a perm class to me, if not i will sure kpkb, mixed lvl, we hard to teacch, they will also progress very slowly de dey, esp those higher lvl. not compeitive trg leh dey ... and then in the class one 'hyperactive' kid, reminds me of one student which i used to teach 2 yrs back ...
fly fly , I hope to fly . I mean able to fly further ...
there was once this swimmer friend of mine told me:
'breaststoke is easy to learn but hard to master','butterfly on the other hand is hard to learn but easy to master' goshhh how true !
had a hilarous evening at marv hse ! hahahhaha
--- " ---
alright i suppose
Started the day with driving lesson in my damn sleepy mode where mistakes were all over the place. was like OMG ! WTH am i doing ??!
next next i realised i always late or didn follow the timing i set for myself. e.g.
I will always set 2 time to go out. e.g. got class at 3pm, travel time: 1hr15mins, buffer time: 30mins, go get unimportant stuffs + lepa(relax): 1hr. soooo by right i shld be leaving hse at like 1215?? then agn i always fall back to the die die then go timing which is like 130pm ??!! hooollyyy fishhHHh ! which means the 'unimportant' tasking will always be left undone .. :( sighhhh
up next ... something which happppeennn outt of the blue !!
as usual, seeing those ppl who is conducting survey, I will always SIAM ! but then again if they manage to approach me in time, i will give them that little 'time' if i am not in a rush.
Who knows, after SIAMMing sooo many, there was one who appear out of no where! then i told her 'sorry miss, i am in a rush' (which i really in the rush). well then the pretty lady (wahh really quite! damn wasted !jkjk) 'i just need that few sec' (as if she knew that was gg to come out of my mouth beforehand)... well then she said 'we are looking male models, would like to ask if you are interested, i know you are in a hurry, here's my namecard, take your time to consider' and welll i was like O_O"'' thinking ' siao ! i think your eyes got stamps on sioh!' me sooo skinny .... dot .. dot are you guys in need of skinny models ?? if you guys in need of skinny models then i dont mind trying ! wahhahaha lol jkjk
relieve class, wtfish chapalan class, all mixed level, i was like 'HOW TO TEACH and TEST ??!!' 3 to 4 diff level leh ... -_-"' sigh sigh. oh welll wat to dooo, lucky it's not a perm class to me, if not i will sure kpkb, mixed lvl, we hard to teacch, they will also progress very slowly de dey, esp those higher lvl. not compeitive trg leh dey ... and then in the class one 'hyperactive' kid, reminds me of one student which i used to teach 2 yrs back ...
fly fly , I hope to fly . I mean able to fly further ...
there was once this swimmer friend of mine told me:
'breaststoke is easy to learn but hard to master','butterfly on the other hand is hard to learn but easy to master' goshhh how true !
had a hilarous evening at marv hse ! hahahhaha
--- " ---
Monday, July 12, 2010
: :)
one united people - sun yan zi.
this song was the song that give me the 'up' feeling! whenever i heard it i energy level = x10. Also remind me happy moments that have happened back in 2003, the feeling of standing in the National Stadium. It hold so much memories in me. e patrotic feelings, e hardcore gang and e short love story.
same here at padang, whenever upon hearing it, i know i will make it well. 7 years ltr i am back standing on the ground, but with different excution, different uniform and different standard demand. To some it might be a burden, but to me it means more then just pride and honour. When u think it's for the country, then every sacrifices is worthwhile. Thanks for granting my last wishes i have in NS. :)
simply in loves with NDP songs !
-------- "
nice dining out with all my siblings thou i didn really like the food! 2 bikes, 4 peep, just nice ! hahaha
that's family day ! hahaha nxt week shall go lao sim (grandaunt) hse and eat with her !!! she 's the next closest kin to me (even when compared to my grand parents) welll complicated family history over here. hahaha
-------- "
one united people - sun yan zi.
this song was the song that give me the 'up' feeling! whenever i heard it i energy level = x10. Also remind me happy moments that have happened back in 2003, the feeling of standing in the National Stadium. It hold so much memories in me. e patrotic feelings, e hardcore gang and e short love story.
same here at padang, whenever upon hearing it, i know i will make it well. 7 years ltr i am back standing on the ground, but with different excution, different uniform and different standard demand. To some it might be a burden, but to me it means more then just pride and honour. When u think it's for the country, then every sacrifices is worthwhile. Thanks for granting my last wishes i have in NS. :)
simply in loves with NDP songs !
-------- "
nice dining out with all my siblings thou i didn really like the food! 2 bikes, 4 peep, just nice ! hahaha
that's family day ! hahaha nxt week shall go lao sim (grandaunt) hse and eat with her !!! she 's the next closest kin to me (even when compared to my grand parents) welll complicated family history over here. hahaha
-------- "
Saturday, July 10, 2010
: -
retard ! i am a fisking retard ! gosh what a mistake to made ! sigh ! dont even feel like talking about it. If only i am less lazy and pass to them on the earlier days.
thou right from the start, i knew things were impossible. still i nv regret on follow certain feelings and making my choice. At least i learn and experience certain things/feelings i never had before. :)
------- ' -------
retard ! i am a fisking retard ! gosh what a mistake to made ! sigh ! dont even feel like talking about it. If only i am less lazy and pass to them on the earlier days.
thou right from the start, i knew things were impossible. still i nv regret on follow certain feelings and making my choice. At least i learn and experience certain things/feelings i never had before. :)
------- ' -------
Thursday, July 08, 2010
: purple wind
sigh, total disappointment
Sick ? Flu? (you looks perfectly fine !) but the point is you didn try at all, and that's disappointing, when even the most tire/unfit guy is slow jogging, when even some having stitch is running, the point is at least they jog. you used to be one of the better ones in my eyes, but you have prove me otherwise situation after situations. And you let G shift team down ..
I can be your friend outside but pls I am not ur friend during trg, i have certain objective to achieve for everyone, and it's for everyone's good.
fisking WRONG and SELFISH MENTALITY ! gosh !
it's suppose to be my off day, i am doing u guys a favour, everyones knows, but some wldn. kns.
-----" ------
alright 1 x rabbit pass away. i suppose it's time, when one turn old then frail what left after is death.
-----" -----
sigh, total disappointment
Sick ? Flu? (you looks perfectly fine !) but the point is you didn try at all, and that's disappointing, when even the most tire/unfit guy is slow jogging, when even some having stitch is running, the point is at least they jog. you used to be one of the better ones in my eyes, but you have prove me otherwise situation after situations. And you let G shift team down ..
I can be your friend outside but pls I am not ur friend during trg, i have certain objective to achieve for everyone, and it's for everyone's good.
fisking WRONG and SELFISH MENTALITY ! gosh !
it's suppose to be my off day, i am doing u guys a favour, everyones knows, but some wldn. kns.
-----" ------
alright 1 x rabbit pass away. i suppose it's time, when one turn old then frail what left after is death.
-----" -----
Tuesday, July 06, 2010
: -
another day, passes like tat...
really glad that i have u guys around me in my army life, e specs cohort KW, Charlie, WY, Eug Seah, Kodi, Gerry, Ian, Pooh Wei, Fei Bian Gou, WJ ... ...
e men cohort : other day ba haha
Soon ya, time files, and it's my turn . :)
Thanks KW for the guide to wheellock by bike. hahaha though u kanna parking summon partly becos of me. oh weelll agree to split the summon cost liao sooo don kpkb le uh ! hahahhaa
oh well, news from kw that 1 guy at about same age as us got into a bike accident, in m'sia, currently brain dead. sigh . and apparently is all becos of a pothole, gosh! life , is both pre-destinated yet it is in ur own hands. there were soo many if if if, then it wldn happen. but then again that's life. i suppose i am really lucky, after so many times of 'almost'.
tml will be a better day. slowly bits by pieces stitch it up.
--- --- --- --- "
another day, passes like tat...
really glad that i have u guys around me in my army life, e specs cohort KW, Charlie, WY, Eug Seah, Kodi, Gerry, Ian, Pooh Wei, Fei Bian Gou, WJ ... ...
e men cohort : other day ba haha
Soon ya, time files, and it's my turn . :)
Thanks KW for the guide to wheellock by bike. hahaha though u kanna parking summon partly becos of me. oh weelll agree to split the summon cost liao sooo don kpkb le uh ! hahahhaa
oh well, news from kw that 1 guy at about same age as us got into a bike accident, in m'sia, currently brain dead. sigh . and apparently is all becos of a pothole, gosh! life , is both pre-destinated yet it is in ur own hands. there were soo many if if if, then it wldn happen. but then again that's life. i suppose i am really lucky, after so many times of 'almost'.
tml will be a better day. slowly bits by pieces stitch it up.
--- --- --- --- "
Monday, July 05, 2010
: -
goshhh new medic drawing my blood ! and ya, u can see my blood oozing out instead of flowing into the tube. anyway, he gonna start with someone to gain xperiences, and well the someone is me .... -_-"'
-------
it's over , better for u i suppose. do smile more often, or rather more happy after all this 'burdens' have left u, though i didn know why it was a 'burden' to u. i see the points, i felt it too. there's a need for this full-stop, no point having commas when the continuation is always -ve. i suppose this is the best ending for u and me.
will take sometimes to heal, really glad that at least the one injured isnt u :)
thanks for the :) memories.
and mr cupid, thanks for the lesson, though its a impactful one.
but surely, i have learn to see things other way.
the last task shall carry on thou. the last thing i am contributing :)
------- " ----------
goshhh new medic drawing my blood ! and ya, u can see my blood oozing out instead of flowing into the tube. anyway, he gonna start with someone to gain xperiences, and well the someone is me .... -_-"'
-------
it's over , better for u i suppose. do smile more often, or rather more happy after all this 'burdens' have left u, though i didn know why it was a 'burden' to u. i see the points, i felt it too. there's a need for this full-stop, no point having commas when the continuation is always -ve. i suppose this is the best ending for u and me.
will take sometimes to heal, really glad that at least the one injured isnt u :)
thanks for the :) memories.
and mr cupid, thanks for the lesson, though its a impactful one.
but surely, i have learn to see things other way.
the last task shall carry on thou. the last thing i am contributing :)
------- " ----------
Sunday, July 04, 2010
: idk
i do this parade for the country,
i do this parade for the contingent,
i do this parade for setting a example,
i do this parade for the audiences,
i do this parade for people who put in alot of efforts behind (rsm s, helpers, everyone),
for all this reasons, i will do it well. it not just for me myself and i anymore.
i know my presence doesnt really matter, haha but if it does and i am unable to attend ur bd, i am sorry but still will try my best. hopefully situations permits.
not a usual sunday,
- gym with ah ben (was gossiping about a friend who got a gf in just 2DAYS ! (from stranger to GF in JUST 2 DAYS !) LOL
- watch ip man ( legend is born) w ah ben, lose a bet over a small popcorn ! the movie is worth watching ! (Y)
- BB with ah ben, hua hong and friend (gosh legs is aching )
felt extreme tired ytd, just knock out w/o turning off the lappy.
today am, cant even carry weights that i usually carry :(
knock out immediately agn in the evening upon i reach home.
goshhh extreme fatigue. needa buck up for that.
shifted all my focus on other things it works, though at times thoughts are still on u...
sometimes, we masked so that ppl will think we are ok, but also as u masked urself u might just forgot the initial feelings u had. u nv know how ur feelings affect others around you. so by smiling, they might feel better if they are troubled and you wouldn spoil certain amosphere that situations created.
'iwishihavemoregutstosay' = i hope to know wat is running through ur mind . just say it, no harm afterall. but idk anything, so i cant really help afterall. one of the worse thing have happened, so if it's regarding me, then u sldn be pondering whether sld u say or not say, because nth else could be worse i suppose. goshhh why am i thinking -vely agn (cant be helped)... though very much i hope that something +ve will happen btw us.
think about it, it's not that matters afterall.so learn to take easy ya! you shld be focusing on some other stuffs!
----------- " 2307040710
i do this parade for the country,
i do this parade for the contingent,
i do this parade for setting a example,
i do this parade for the audiences,
i do this parade for people who put in alot of efforts behind (rsm s, helpers, everyone),
for all this reasons, i will do it well. it not just for me myself and i anymore.
i know my presence doesnt really matter, haha but if it does and i am unable to attend ur bd, i am sorry but still will try my best. hopefully situations permits.
not a usual sunday,
- gym with ah ben (was gossiping about a friend who got a gf in just 2DAYS ! (from stranger to GF in JUST 2 DAYS !) LOL
- watch ip man ( legend is born) w ah ben, lose a bet over a small popcorn ! the movie is worth watching ! (Y)
- BB with ah ben, hua hong and friend (gosh legs is aching )
felt extreme tired ytd, just knock out w/o turning off the lappy.
today am, cant even carry weights that i usually carry :(
knock out immediately agn in the evening upon i reach home.
goshhh extreme fatigue. needa buck up for that.
shifted all my focus on other things it works, though at times thoughts are still on u...
sometimes, we masked so that ppl will think we are ok, but also as u masked urself u might just forgot the initial feelings u had. u nv know how ur feelings affect others around you. so by smiling, they might feel better if they are troubled and you wouldn spoil certain amosphere that situations created.
'iwishihavemoregutstosay' = i hope to know wat is running through ur mind . just say it, no harm afterall. but idk anything, so i cant really help afterall. one of the worse thing have happened, so if it's regarding me, then u sldn be pondering whether sld u say or not say, because nth else could be worse i suppose. goshhh why am i thinking -vely agn (cant be helped)... though very much i hope that something +ve will happen btw us.
think about it, it's not that matters afterall.so learn to take easy ya! you shld be focusing on some other stuffs!
----------- " 2307040710
03jul. Sat. -
- 1x baby sitting at my immediate front caught my attention.
- a little boy say 'hi' to me with a smile on the bridge. :)
- no mistakes :)
-----
we can forgive but not forget.
that's why the pain is always there somewhere, so whenever you see somethings that reminds you of it, you will feel it.
ur day, my pain.
-----
i wonder why shld i bother about those people's feelings and situations, when they dont even try to understand mine ?
hmmm
that's y,
think simple, nth bother you, but you will be a fool when times come
think complicated, everythings trouble you, but you will see a clearer picture in life.
-----
it wldn be right for me to give up when you havent.
a) feeling still exist
b) never really got started although statues says so
c) our story is still stuck at the introduction part.
soo i will still goes along with you if you want to give it a try.
you wan it, i initiate it.. then things started
so when u don wan it, pls tell me, then i will initate it.. then things will ends.
sometimes i have doubts in ur words, as they were nv put into actions.
------
extracted from some song.
你想要的我却不能够给你我全部
我能给的却又不是你想要拥有的
我们不适合也不想认输
-----
- 1x baby sitting at my immediate front caught my attention.
- a little boy say 'hi' to me with a smile on the bridge. :)
- no mistakes :)
-----
we can forgive but not forget.
that's why the pain is always there somewhere, so whenever you see somethings that reminds you of it, you will feel it.
ur day, my pain.
-----
i wonder why shld i bother about those people's feelings and situations, when they dont even try to understand mine ?
hmmm
that's y,
think simple, nth bother you, but you will be a fool when times come
think complicated, everythings trouble you, but you will see a clearer picture in life.
-----
it wldn be right for me to give up when you havent.
a) feeling still exist
b) never really got started although statues says so
c) our story is still stuck at the introduction part.
soo i will still goes along with you if you want to give it a try.
you wan it, i initiate it.. then things started
so when u don wan it, pls tell me, then i will initate it.. then things will ends.
sometimes i have doubts in ur words, as they were nv put into actions.
------
extracted from some song.
你想要的我却不能够给你我全部
我能给的却又不是你想要拥有的
我们不适合也不想认输
-----
Friday, July 02, 2010
: breezy wind
am : some irresponsible guy did not turn out for laundry collection, off his phone, play MIA ! how can i trust such a person like this again ? >:(
am: rot rot rot + eat eat eat
pm: clean bike? but it's raining cats and dogs outside :(
---------
some stuffs/ reality
idk why, but certainly our friendship turn sour becos of this, certainly there's some misunderstanding involve. oh well that's life, though its avoidable, but it's requires lots of efforts and talkings. who's right ? who's wrong ? well no point pointing fingers when this is 'destinated'.
joining g shift (parades) certainly has cost me alot of sacrifics (more responsiblities, back on off days, more taskings, ord later, no beach trg, cant att certain things) but oh well no regrets though, it's worthwhile, cos it's for my country.
like what stated '没有国，就没有家'
everytime alone = reflection time, yup i dont blame anyone for anything, i suppose there's a reason why i am being put through all these. you need more time, you need to know what you exactly want, you need to know the answers within urself, you need to understand urself more then things will be better for u urself.
' what do you want in a r/s? '
i am sure alot people when posed with this question, they will be lost. :)
like i said , you were never a burden to me.
'it just tat i need the experiences to handle things appropraitely'
i nv tot of encountering this (all this emotionals and situations), but well learn from it ..:)
am : some irresponsible guy did not turn out for laundry collection, off his phone, play MIA ! how can i trust such a person like this again ? >:(
am: rot rot rot + eat eat eat
pm: clean bike? but it's raining cats and dogs outside :(
---------
some stuffs/ reality
idk why, but certainly our friendship turn sour becos of this, certainly there's some misunderstanding involve. oh well that's life, though its avoidable, but it's requires lots of efforts and talkings. who's right ? who's wrong ? well no point pointing fingers when this is 'destinated'.
joining g shift (parades) certainly has cost me alot of sacrifics (more responsiblities, back on off days, more taskings, ord later, no beach trg, cant att certain things) but oh well no regrets though, it's worthwhile, cos it's for my country.
like what stated '没有国，就没有家'
everytime alone = reflection time, yup i dont blame anyone for anything, i suppose there's a reason why i am being put through all these. you need more time, you need to know what you exactly want, you need to know the answers within urself, you need to understand urself more then things will be better for u urself.
' what do you want in a r/s? '
i am sure alot people when posed with this question, they will be lost. :)
like i said , you were never a burden to me.
'it just tat i need the experiences to handle things appropraitely'
i nv tot of encountering this (all this emotionals and situations), but well learn from it ..:)
Thursday, July 01, 2010
: windy blue
- the weather is on ourside (so we don have to do another rehersal + no sun during the actual parade) =)
- 1 parade down =)
- 0 mistakes made for this parade =) (though mistakes were everywhere during the 'warm up' session) =(
--------- " -------------
often i dream of things that i hope to achieve or happen, but it will nv happen because the situation, human and confident factors is not there to fulfill. well well that's , that why dreams are beautiful.
- the weather is on ourside (so we don have to do another rehersal + no sun during the actual parade) =)
- 1 parade down =)
- 0 mistakes made for this parade =) (though mistakes were everywhere during the 'warm up' session) =(
--------- " -------------
often i dream of things that i hope to achieve or happen, but it will nv happen because the situation, human and confident factors is not there to fulfill. well well that's , that why dreams are beautiful.
Wednesday, June 30, 2010
: greyish wind
alright now, after thoughts, i suppose i manage to see a very clear picture, probably clearer then what she see in herself.
according to experiences, all these that happened shows,
how unimpt/impt a person is to him/ her,
certianly, when that person means alot, care, concern and understanding comes in.
but on the other side, when it's not, then nothing happen, because one cant be bother.
after all these,
i asked myself, how should things be carry on from now? what should i really do?
i touch my heart, it felt numb...
and certainly i have lost my confident for this r/s ..
- when feelings isnt there -
when feelings isnt there, then whatever another party do will not give you the 'blissful/happy' feelings, so that will mean that all efforts will go to drain.
when feelings isnt there, a relationship will become a burden, because then it will restrict your happiest and freedom.
when feelings isnt there, you wouldnt bother to do bits and pieces which will spice up and make the r/s a fulfilling one.
when feelings isnt there, you wouldnt bother to share stuffs (happy, worries, anger, saddess) with that person, so then things stop rolling.
when feelings isnt there, you wouldnt bother to see, do things, creating more memories togeter.
when feelings isnt there, you wouldnt miss that person anymore.
when feelings isnt there, you wouldnt bother to think what you can do for that person anymore.
-------------
but how does it really feels when feelings isnt there anymore,
i choose who to care, who should i fall for ... (is that the reason why i will never experience being the one who 'feelings isnt there anymore?)
alot people out there says follow feelings, but i realise that feelings are complicated.
i suppose feelings is just a igniter for the start for the r/s,
from then on, it depends on individuals,
on how you want to make things special,
on how you want to make that person different from others in ur life (friends, classmates, workmates ... .. )
on how you getting ur life involve with his/her,
on how you getting use having him/ her revolving around urs,
on how you getting use of having him/ her doing certain things for u,
on how you getting use of getting certian things done together.....
---- " -----
if you didnt allow me to step into ur life, then why start?
getting tgt isnt because of having the name/statues (in a relationship), it's because of wanting getting together with this person.
certainly you dont know what you want, what you need from a r/s. for these, i suppose you will figure it out urself in the future.
certainly whatever written is base purely on personal experiences and thoughts.
not angry or sad, it's just facing the reality.
glad that you guys are there to cheery me out =)
c how things goes ...
---- " ----
gosh wasted my half day today by sleeping at home ! -_-"''
OMG i am wasting time ! when i suppose to wash my dear bike, book FFI and Dental Appt, going to NTUC for house groceries ... and now i gonna book in agn for tmr BIG DAY. gosh hope everything will turn out great tmr, D Day ( pls pls no fainting spells, no mistakes ) !!
paraniod as always.
----- " -----
alright now, after thoughts, i suppose i manage to see a very clear picture, probably clearer then what she see in herself.
according to experiences, all these that happened shows,
how unimpt/impt a person is to him/ her,
certianly, when that person means alot, care, concern and understanding comes in.
but on the other side, when it's not, then nothing happen, because one cant be bother.
after all these,
i asked myself, how should things be carry on from now? what should i really do?
i touch my heart, it felt numb...
and certainly i have lost my confident for this r/s ..
- when feelings isnt there -
when feelings isnt there, then whatever another party do will not give you the 'blissful/happy' feelings, so that will mean that all efforts will go to drain.
when feelings isnt there, a relationship will become a burden, because then it will restrict your happiest and freedom.
when feelings isnt there, you wouldnt bother to do bits and pieces which will spice up and make the r/s a fulfilling one.
when feelings isnt there, you wouldnt bother to share stuffs (happy, worries, anger, saddess) with that person, so then things stop rolling.
when feelings isnt there, you wouldnt bother to see, do things, creating more memories togeter.
when feelings isnt there, you wouldnt miss that person anymore.
when feelings isnt there, you wouldnt bother to think what you can do for that person anymore.
-------------
but how does it really feels when feelings isnt there anymore,
i choose who to care, who should i fall for ... (is that the reason why i will never experience being the one who 'feelings isnt there anymore?)
alot people out there says follow feelings, but i realise that feelings are complicated.
i suppose feelings is just a igniter for the start for the r/s,
from then on, it depends on individuals,
on how you want to make things special,
on how you want to make that person different from others in ur life (friends, classmates, workmates ... .. )
on how you getting ur life involve with his/her,
on how you getting use having him/ her revolving around urs,
on how you getting use of having him/ her doing certain things for u,
on how you getting use of getting certian things done together.....
---- " -----
if you didnt allow me to step into ur life, then why start?
getting tgt isnt because of having the name/statues (in a relationship), it's because of wanting getting together with this person.
certainly you dont know what you want, what you need from a r/s. for these, i suppose you will figure it out urself in the future.
certainly whatever written is base purely on personal experiences and thoughts.
not angry or sad, it's just facing the reality.
glad that you guys are there to cheery me out =)
c how things goes ...
---- " ----
gosh wasted my half day today by sleeping at home ! -_-"''
OMG i am wasting time ! when i suppose to wash my dear bike, book FFI and Dental Appt, going to NTUC for house groceries ... and now i gonna book in agn for tmr BIG DAY. gosh hope everything will turn out great tmr, D Day ( pls pls no fainting spells, no mistakes ) !!
paraniod as always.
----- " -----
Tuesday, June 29, 2010
: super mixed
tossing on the bed from 1130pm till 430am then finally get to slp, 1 hrs ltr alarm rang , time to wake up. insomia
---- " ----
a msg came saying wanna tell me some stuffs,
i tot it's those kinda 'good bye' msg, but it turn out to be a 'explaination' msg.
what is really going on ? it's really complicated. sigh. i kinda relieve knowing the truth but on another side it's a mixed feelings. and i kinda lost not knowing what to do.
i suppose we see r/s differently.
' when you dont know where you want to head to, you wldn reach any destination'
1 x msg :/
1 x unforsee situation = 1 x sai gang :(
4 x rehers = :(
1 x hangout chit chat session with my guys :)
1 x truth = :) + :(
1 x ord letter = :D
---------" -----------
how i hope you will put in more efforts. but still i suppose treasure the moments are still the best policy.
tossing on the bed from 1130pm till 430am then finally get to slp, 1 hrs ltr alarm rang , time to wake up. insomia
---- " ----
a msg came saying wanna tell me some stuffs,
i tot it's those kinda 'good bye' msg, but it turn out to be a 'explaination' msg.
what is really going on ? it's really complicated. sigh. i kinda relieve knowing the truth but on another side it's a mixed feelings. and i kinda lost not knowing what to do.
i suppose we see r/s differently.
' when you dont know where you want to head to, you wldn reach any destination'
1 x msg :/
1 x unforsee situation = 1 x sai gang :(
4 x rehers = :(
1 x hangout chit chat session with my guys :)
1 x truth = :) + :(
1 x ord letter = :D
---------" -----------
how i hope you will put in more efforts. but still i suppose treasure the moments are still the best policy.
Monday, June 28, 2010
: grey wind
Went back to camp to settle some misc stuffs,
boss said: you could have pass down ur duties to other spec, pls rem to clear your leave and off.
i said: yes i will. (i wanted to but i suppose they wouldn wanna do it =(. ) who will wanna take up these responsibilities and extra work ?
oh well people have different principles, different priorities in life.
first official driving lesson today, shiok shiok !! car is still much better =)
abit nervous, well well it has been like 7 yrs ever since i last drove discreetly ? =x
----- " -----
alright, poison subsided, and being able to think in other perspective.
let's set the rule simple,
whatever happen, as long as she happy.
whichever happen, as long as it will be a better path for her.
the rest that happens doesnt matters.
pls learn how to handle situations (with friends you don like, in r./s, in life) so things wldn happen again. Should similar situations arises again, you will be able to handle it more appropriately. =)
just like, after being through the cloudy days, if you learn from it, you will be able to cope or avoid it. if you choose not to, then you will always have a hard time tackling these days.
after short period of mulling, learn from it, be happy ever after
welll welll it's always easier to be said then to be done ...
This quote from some oldies caught my attention.
爱一个人如何死守到老
怎样面对一切我不知道
回忆过去痛苦的相思忘不了
i am a character in your dream, upon waking up, it's time to leave.
i wanna sing my lungs OUT!
----
Went back to camp to settle some misc stuffs,
boss said: you could have pass down ur duties to other spec, pls rem to clear your leave and off.
i said: yes i will. (i wanted to but i suppose they wouldn wanna do it =(. ) who will wanna take up these responsibilities and extra work ?
oh well people have different principles, different priorities in life.
first official driving lesson today, shiok shiok !! car is still much better =)
abit nervous, well well it has been like 7 yrs ever since i last drove discreetly ? =x
----- " -----
alright, poison subsided, and being able to think in other perspective.
let's set the rule simple,
whatever happen, as long as she happy.
whichever happen, as long as it will be a better path for her.
the rest that happens doesnt matters.
pls learn how to handle situations (with friends you don like, in r./s, in life) so things wldn happen again. Should similar situations arises again, you will be able to handle it more appropriately. =)
just like, after being through the cloudy days, if you learn from it, you will be able to cope or avoid it. if you choose not to, then you will always have a hard time tackling these days.
after short period of mulling, learn from it, be happy ever after
welll welll it's always easier to be said then to be done ...
This quote from some oldies caught my attention.
爱一个人如何死守到老
怎样面对一切我不知道
回忆过去痛苦的相思忘不了
i am a character in your dream, upon waking up, it's time to leave.
i wanna sing my lungs OUT!
----
Sunday, June 27, 2010
: purple rain
wth ! one aunty claim that me and my 2nd bro look like twins ! when we are 4 yrs difference in age ! gosh ! and the worse part is she thot i was the older brother!gosh ! do i look tat old ?!
-----" -----
why close blog ?
not really close it but just change the add
it's becos i don wanna let u know how i feel,
don wanna upset u
don wanna restrict and type puzzle
don wanna let u know the truth
becos you wldn be able to handle the situations properly.
after i read between the lines
so i shall handle these all by myself.
and pls be happy.
-----"
the green poison sank deeper into me.
when i look into every minor details i see this.
u ignore my existance
u make me feel weak
u make me feel useless
AGAIN
still i will just blame my stupidity for looking into minor details which make me felt worse.
------------------"
yes a person who cant be bother will never try to understand u.
u know what? i so feel like calling out the decision now instead of waiting after ur bd. but still there i so many considerations...
the heart of mine is dying, one u will realise u are just holding a cold 'feeling less' hand.
just like what u stated
If it doesn't break your heart, it isn't love .
If a relationship can't move forward, it withers .
------------- "
wth ! one aunty claim that me and my 2nd bro look like twins ! when we are 4 yrs difference in age ! gosh ! and the worse part is she thot i was the older brother!gosh ! do i look tat old ?!
-----" -----
why close blog ?
not really close it but just change the add
it's becos i don wanna let u know how i feel,
don wanna upset u
don wanna restrict and type puzzle
don wanna let u know the truth
becos you wldn be able to handle the situations properly.
after i read between the lines
so i shall handle these all by myself.
and pls be happy.
-----"
the green poison sank deeper into me.
when i look into every minor details i see this.
u ignore my existance
u make me feel weak
u make me feel useless
AGAIN
still i will just blame my stupidity for looking into minor details which make me felt worse.
------------------"
yes a person who cant be bother will never try to understand u.
u know what? i so feel like calling out the decision now instead of waiting after ur bd. but still there i so many considerations...
the heart of mine is dying, one u will realise u are just holding a cold 'feeling less' hand.
just like what u stated
If it doesn't break your heart, it isn't love .
If a relationship can't move forward, it withers .
------------- "
Saturday, June 26, 2010
26jun. Sat. Purple rain
I cant take this. it's abit too much ..
i dont need some other guy who u put as admin to invite me to your bd celebration. it just shows what i am to u and what he is to you .
so pls, do watever u two wanna do, but pls keep me in the dark. becos i had enuff of all these nonsense.
why me in the first place, whereby u guys get closer after we got tgt, so am i a toy to u two? since u guys like each other then go ahead, why drag me into the picture! whereby now my feelings are affected.
you made me feel useless, u made me feel like a fool.
i always there wanting to help, but u nv once accept it.
when u need help, i knw i nv be the first person that come to ur mind.
i have alrd choose to lenghten this path of suffering (when ur feelings is not there anymore). Just to do this one last task, and off i go (since that's what u wanted).
i choose to standby a person who doesnt give a damn or concern about me, a person who's not even trying.
it's not easy, certainly , it's just like having the 2nd stab and lenghten the stab.
thanks for the prank cupid. i feels like a fishing clown in the circus. and u wldn know how shitty i am feeling now. nth could be worse. it's just a one sided affair ultimately.
well not knowing all these will be better for u, then u wldn be so trouble.
at least at the end, the memories on ur side would be a more happy one.
soory blogg, for venting this out on u, this is the only place where my mask can be take off.
bad headache since afternoon ...
--------------------" 27060007
I cant take this. it's abit too much ..
i dont need some other guy who u put as admin to invite me to your bd celebration. it just shows what i am to u and what he is to you .
so pls, do watever u two wanna do, but pls keep me in the dark. becos i had enuff of all these nonsense.
why me in the first place, whereby u guys get closer after we got tgt, so am i a toy to u two? since u guys like each other then go ahead, why drag me into the picture! whereby now my feelings are affected.
you made me feel useless, u made me feel like a fool.
i always there wanting to help, but u nv once accept it.
when u need help, i knw i nv be the first person that come to ur mind.
i have alrd choose to lenghten this path of suffering (when ur feelings is not there anymore). Just to do this one last task, and off i go (since that's what u wanted).
i choose to standby a person who doesnt give a damn or concern about me, a person who's not even trying.
it's not easy, certainly , it's just like having the 2nd stab and lenghten the stab.
thanks for the prank cupid. i feels like a fishing clown in the circus. and u wldn know how shitty i am feeling now. nth could be worse. it's just a one sided affair ultimately.
well not knowing all these will be better for u, then u wldn be so trouble.
at least at the end, the memories on ur side would be a more happy one.
soory blogg, for venting this out on u, this is the only place where my mask can be take off.
bad headache since afternoon ...
--------------------" 27060007
Friday, June 25, 2010
25jun. fri. breezy blue
nice afternoon having her around.
look ard .. and yes certainly r/s is just like a gamble of ur own feelings.
someone asked, no pain meh ??
sometimes it's not that it doesnt hurt but it just that it had turn soo numb to it.
who wldn in such situations ?
certainly the fact is that i cant provide her the most simplest task - 'happiness' , instead 'troubles and problems' were given to her.
oh well... 23 ++ days ltr ... it will be another phase of life for her, prolly with me taking a step out of her life ... after i fulfill the last task . she will be happier then after =)
was listening to some emo songs certainly remind me of the some past and present situations ...
'ni hai ai wo ma' - jolin
'wo zhi dao ni hen nan guo' - jolin
'ni kuai le ma' - jolin
'zui jing' - li sheng jie
listen to the lyrics, feel the story
---------------- 26060030hrs.
23jun. wed. -
woke up @ 3plus
look at the watch: 313 am -_-"'
back to slp.. cont dream
woke up agn @ 4 plus
look at the watch: 426am -_-|||
what's wrong with my body clock! and i am practically dreaming the whole night in camp ! gosh !
weird dream:
A dream with her at some road side food stall
-----------------" 2406. xxxx hrs
nice afternoon having her around.
look ard .. and yes certainly r/s is just like a gamble of ur own feelings.
someone asked, no pain meh ??
sometimes it's not that it doesnt hurt but it just that it had turn soo numb to it.
who wldn in such situations ?
certainly the fact is that i cant provide her the most simplest task - 'happiness' , instead 'troubles and problems' were given to her.
oh well... 23 ++ days ltr ... it will be another phase of life for her, prolly with me taking a step out of her life ... after i fulfill the last task . she will be happier then after =)
was listening to some emo songs certainly remind me of the some past and present situations ...
'ni hai ai wo ma' - jolin
'wo zhi dao ni hen nan guo' - jolin
'ni kuai le ma' - jolin
'zui jing' - li sheng jie
listen to the lyrics, feel the story
---------------- 26060030hrs.
23jun. wed. -
woke up @ 3plus
look at the watch: 313 am -_-"'
back to slp.. cont dream
woke up agn @ 4 plus
look at the watch: 426am -_-|||
what's wrong with my body clock! and i am practically dreaming the whole night in camp ! gosh !
weird dream:
A dream with her at some road side food stall
-----------------" 2406. xxxx hrs
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
23jun. Wed. breezy blue.
YEAH manage to pass FTT, was so worry that i might fail due to insufficient preparation.
------" ------------
it takes 2 hands to clap.
hope e feelings on ur side will be back.
i will wait sliently, till ur feelings gone totally.
the glimpse of hope.
..... " -------
i know if i nv appear in ur life. u will never be so trouble..
but still i am glad u appear in my life, thou moments are short, i nv regret choosing this path.
sometimes he hate himself for being useless when trap in a situaion like this.
sometimes he wonder why cupid put him through similar situations agn and agn.
she like him, they like each other, he like her.
why does moment of liking each other is always so short ?
well well that's life.
soooo many problems in life.
stand by me, will u ?
我学会用微笑带过
....." ------ 23062001hrs
YEAH manage to pass FTT, was so worry that i might fail due to insufficient preparation.
------" ------------
it takes 2 hands to clap.
hope e feelings on ur side will be back.
i will wait sliently, till ur feelings gone totally.
the glimpse of hope.
..... " -------
i know if i nv appear in ur life. u will never be so trouble..
but still i am glad u appear in my life, thou moments are short, i nv regret choosing this path.
sometimes he hate himself for being useless when trap in a situaion like this.
sometimes he wonder why cupid put him through similar situations agn and agn.
she like him, they like each other, he like her.
why does moment of liking each other is always so short ?
well well that's life.
soooo many problems in life.
stand by me, will u ?
我学会用微笑带过
....." ------ 23062001hrs
22jun. Tues. Cloudy Red
FTT in less then 10hrs time. guess i gonna fail it! gosh, didn really study/ read-up on it.
10rds around the track and my legs are aching. weak... more mid d running needed.
i wldn want to be an irritant and make things worse. sigh ...
there are things which i want to do, but i cant... becos this and that ..
how i wish.
---- " ----
people will only see what is shown, very often they will never know/ don care the efforts and processes.
often people say things when they are not going to carry out.
---- " ----
no one says anything, they have simply left us out. nothing was told, nothing was inform and they always expect me/us to know everything. pls, i am not 'superman', how would i know things when u guys didnt inform me/ pass down the information. gosh ! this isnt the first time. it's always like that. sigh .. miscom miscom.
---- " ----
cant u just shutup stupid , u are extremely noisy. u claim we are a family, we shld help u this give u this but what have u done for us in the past and even now?! sai! wtfish ! only know how to smoke and drink ! fish U! thanks to ur selfishness and being irresponsible.
and lucky u stop ! else ! i am really gonna shout it out at u !
---- " ----
extremely unhappy !!
---------------------- " ---------------------- 23060058
FTT in less then 10hrs time. guess i gonna fail it! gosh, didn really study/ read-up on it.
10rds around the track and my legs are aching. weak... more mid d running needed.
i wldn want to be an irritant and make things worse. sigh ...
there are things which i want to do, but i cant... becos this and that ..
how i wish.
---- " ----
people will only see what is shown, very often they will never know/ don care the efforts and processes.
often people say things when they are not going to carry out.
---- " ----
no one says anything, they have simply left us out. nothing was told, nothing was inform and they always expect me/us to know everything. pls, i am not 'superman', how would i know things when u guys didnt inform me/ pass down the information. gosh ! this isnt the first time. it's always like that. sigh .. miscom miscom.
---- " ----
cant u just shutup stupid , u are extremely noisy. u claim we are a family, we shld help u this give u this but what have u done for us in the past and even now?! sai! wtfish ! only know how to smoke and drink ! fish U! thanks to ur selfishness and being irresponsible.
and lucky u stop ! else ! i am really gonna shout it out at u !
---- " ----
extremely unhappy !!
---------------------- " ---------------------- 23060058
Monday, June 21, 2010
21jun. Mon. green cloud
0 excution mistake for today's rehersal. great hopefully this will happen on the actual day too.
certainly the sore throat, running nose and dry cough is killing me. having hard time to control it while trying to stand still.
---- "
a asked: 'why u so garang?'
b : 'garang?'
a: as in doing everything urself
b: cos it's part of responsibility
a: there are also so other s around
b: but i suppose they wouldn want to bother, that's life. and if i dont ,then no one will.
conclusion
' why bother to make others life easier when it's going to make urs worst ?'
felt stupid at times . yes. for everything happening around.
---- "
'i am lost , nth can be done for this and perhaps let time and fate make the decision.'
------------23472106
20jun. Sun. Red Cloud
NRWC as traffic controller, alright although it's under hot sun without shelter, but at least it isnt boring.
--- "
'Why this?! I thought it's always like that?!'
sai ! how dare u said this! i have always trying to be nice to u guys, and u take all these privileges for something that it should be given.
Seriously at that point of time I was extremely >:( . Maybe not giving them these privileges that often would be a better choice, so that they wouldnt take it for granted.
i dislike people who treat others like shit, no giving others the basic respect.
--- "
And yes, now my life is revolving around these things ,
when u get this, u will expect more.
when u get this, u wont cherish it.
when u get this, u threw it aside.
when u get this, u will think 'that' is always better.
'one who never taste bitter will not appreciate the sweetness within.'
----------23522006
19jun. Sat. Purple wind
1 x major mistake
2 x minor mistake
unknown no. of unknown mistake
---------23301906
0 excution mistake for today's rehersal. great hopefully this will happen on the actual day too.
certainly the sore throat, running nose and dry cough is killing me. having hard time to control it while trying to stand still.
---- "
a asked: 'why u so garang?'
b : 'garang?'
a: as in doing everything urself
b: cos it's part of responsibility
a: there are also so other s around
b: but i suppose they wouldn want to bother, that's life. and if i dont ,then no one will.
conclusion
' why bother to make others life easier when it's going to make urs worst ?'
felt stupid at times . yes. for everything happening around.
---- "
'i am lost , nth can be done for this and perhaps let time and fate make the decision.'
------------23472106
20jun. Sun. Red Cloud
NRWC as traffic controller, alright although it's under hot sun without shelter, but at least it isnt boring.
--- "
'Why this?! I thought it's always like that?!'
sai ! how dare u said this! i have always trying to be nice to u guys, and u take all these privileges for something that it should be given.
Seriously at that point of time I was extremely >:( . Maybe not giving them these privileges that often would be a better choice, so that they wouldnt take it for granted.
i dislike people who treat others like shit, no giving others the basic respect.
--- "
And yes, now my life is revolving around these things ,
when u get this, u will expect more.
when u get this, u wont cherish it.
when u get this, u threw it aside.
when u get this, u will think 'that' is always better.
'one who never taste bitter will not appreciate the sweetness within.'
----------23522006
19jun. Sat. Purple wind
1 x major mistake
2 x minor mistake
unknown no. of unknown mistake
---------23301906
Friday, June 18, 2010
18jun. thurs. purple rain.
---- "
saw a dog at the road side.
instinct says: 'hello !! he gonna run across the road!'
action: slow down, almost stopping.
as i approaching, he just dashed across the road.
action: stop !
the owner smile, a sign of thank you.
alright lucky i followed my instinct, gosh.
well instinct helps at times like this =)
really miss him at this point of time, thou he have left us to another world 6 yrs ago . sigh.
give me another chance, i ll take good care of him.
sometimes in life it just take to lost certain things inorder to appreciate it.
----- "
things change drastically for the way he say things as compared to ytd. it's like a 360 degree change. aleight i guess it's human nature when they are just not in the mood. -_-"'
----- "
i made mistakes after mistakes which i usually don, and well thanks that no one notice it.
fatigue + problems alll over everywhere, both mentally and physically exhausted.
how i hope this guys can just take their own initiative to do certian things, instead of waiting for someone to push or serve them.
though it's irritating sometimes to handle people and situations. and ya a simple minded person like me doesnt like trouble. ohh well handling issues in shift, people of higher up and under me, people from other places (log, trans...) . and i realise it feels weird to speak a complete chinese sentence.(thanks to bus driver who doesnt understand angmo at alll) somehow or rather got so use to mixing angmo, dialect and chinese together. 'singlish' eh ?
but certainly i have pick up alot new stuffs in this process =)
for all the problems in life, i suppose i'll just blame on my stupidity and incompetent to solve certian puzzles and situations in life.
it certainly feels better after the ride 'flying' back.
simple and nice shirt. (Y)
there's alot of things going through mr brain.
hi mr headache, bloocknose.
'just realise my green ic is in the washing machine' ...
------ " ------ 19060018
17jun. thurs. purple rain.
certainly yes, affected even though 6th sense have told me so beforehand.
approaching the tip of the cliff, but still hope for miracles to happen.
hi mr sorethroat.
------" ------- 2300++1706
15jun. tues. purple cloud
it's tough. At first i tot, but life stated otherwise.
alright, face it, it's just another similar cycle, round and round.
gosh i seriously need some morale booster. morale meter running dry.
---- "
'never regret on decision i made, even though life state otherwise, i will never let this word appear in my dictionary.'
----" 15062300++
---- "
saw a dog at the road side.
instinct says: 'hello !! he gonna run across the road!'
action: slow down, almost stopping.
as i approaching, he just dashed across the road.
action: stop !
the owner smile, a sign of thank you.
alright lucky i followed my instinct, gosh.
well instinct helps at times like this =)
really miss him at this point of time, thou he have left us to another world 6 yrs ago . sigh.
give me another chance, i ll take good care of him.
sometimes in life it just take to lost certain things inorder to appreciate it.
----- "
things change drastically for the way he say things as compared to ytd. it's like a 360 degree change. aleight i guess it's human nature when they are just not in the mood. -_-"'
----- "
i made mistakes after mistakes which i usually don, and well thanks that no one notice it.
fatigue + problems alll over everywhere, both mentally and physically exhausted.
how i hope this guys can just take their own initiative to do certian things, instead of waiting for someone to push or serve them.
though it's irritating sometimes to handle people and situations. and ya a simple minded person like me doesnt like trouble. ohh well handling issues in shift, people of higher up and under me, people from other places (log, trans...) . and i realise it feels weird to speak a complete chinese sentence.(thanks to bus driver who doesnt understand angmo at alll) somehow or rather got so use to mixing angmo, dialect and chinese together. 'singlish' eh ?
but certainly i have pick up alot new stuffs in this process =)
for all the problems in life, i suppose i'll just blame on my stupidity and incompetent to solve certian puzzles and situations in life.
it certainly feels better after the ride 'flying' back.
simple and nice shirt. (Y)
there's alot of things going through mr brain.
hi mr headache, bloocknose.
'just realise my green ic is in the washing machine' ...
------ " ------ 19060018
17jun. thurs. purple rain.
certainly yes, affected even though 6th sense have told me so beforehand.
approaching the tip of the cliff, but still hope for miracles to happen.
hi mr sorethroat.
------" ------- 2300++1706
15jun. tues. purple cloud
it's tough. At first i tot, but life stated otherwise.
alright, face it, it's just another similar cycle, round and round.
gosh i seriously need some morale booster. morale meter running dry.
---- "
'never regret on decision i made, even though life state otherwise, i will never let this word appear in my dictionary.'
----" 15062300++
Sunday, June 13, 2010
13jun. sun. breezy blue
a simple and blissful image i saw, a kid holding the hands of dad and mum swinging to and fro. :) and there i wonder why on other hand certain kids will nv have the chances to experience this in their life.
somehow or rather i misses those kids back in those days, their nonsense, their simple why why why, their willingness to learn etc etc ...
then this link me days back where there was a debate with one of my friends, why do couple hold hands? well well there's 1001 reasons for this. but then everyones got their answer for the same reason.
--- " --- " ---
'in life most things dont last forever, that's why treasure every moments while things last ... '
--- " 1306102150hrs
a simple and blissful image i saw, a kid holding the hands of dad and mum swinging to and fro. :) and there i wonder why on other hand certain kids will nv have the chances to experience this in their life.
somehow or rather i misses those kids back in those days, their nonsense, their simple why why why, their willingness to learn etc etc ...
then this link me days back where there was a debate with one of my friends, why do couple hold hands? well well there's 1001 reasons for this. but then everyones got their answer for the same reason.
--- " --- " ---
'in life most things dont last forever, that's why treasure every moments while things last ... '
--- " 1306102150hrs
Saturday, June 12, 2010
12jun. sat. -
*alright i am typing nonsense agn, incomplete sentences and meaningless stuffs. soo kindly jus ignore .
the less expected stuffs will always turn out .......
care, concern, comuncation is some of those impt ingredients , but . .. totally speechless. idk . idk . idk . u don say. i wldn know. i suppose that's ....
alright. shut!
i suppose this is just another roller coaster ride in life.
directional signs
< go here
> go there
> < meet
where am i heading to ?? ... somewhere in sg ...
things are actually simple , it just tat ..
some will always get the better parts in life, while some always dont .
some appreciate certian things in life, while some will never understand it.
well well ... like always said . that's life. sigh .
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - " 2355hrs120610
*alright i am typing nonsense agn, incomplete sentences and meaningless stuffs. soo kindly jus ignore .
the less expected stuffs will always turn out .......
care, concern, comuncation is some of those impt ingredients , but . .. totally speechless. idk . idk . idk . u don say. i wldn know. i suppose that's ....
alright. shut!
i suppose this is just another roller coaster ride in life.
directional signs
< go here
> go there
> < meet
where am i heading to ?? ... somewhere in sg ...
things are actually simple , it just tat ..
some will always get the better parts in life, while some always dont .
some appreciate certian things in life, while some will never understand it.
well well ... like always said . that's life. sigh .
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - " 2355hrs120610
Thursday, June 10, 2010
10jun. thu. grey cloud
i don't know, i don't know,i don't know,i don't know,i don't know,i don't know,i don't know,i don't know,i don't know,i don't know,i don't know,i don't know,i don't know,i don't know,i don't know,i don't know,i don't know,i don't know,i don't know,
i close my eyes and wonder...
---------- " ----------- 10jun,1150hrs.
i don't know, i don't know,i don't know,i don't know,i don't know,i don't know,i don't know,i don't know,i don't know,i don't know,i don't know,i don't know,i don't know,i don't know,i don't know,i don't know,i don't know,i don't know,i don't know,
i close my eyes and wonder...
---------- " ----------- 10jun,1150hrs.
Wednesday, June 09, 2010
Monday, June 07, 2010
07may. mon. breezy grey
need to change his stroke totally. it will take quite sometimes. gosh.
oh welll... time to squeeze more brain juice to think about stuffs, ideas and future.
a step back and u ll see.
take a step back,
things will be view differently,
ideas will be generate creatively,
and solutions will emerge out unknowingly.
at times of fustration,
it calm u down,
clear things out,
and enable u to react more appropriately.
there are many ways of doing it,
some through slping,
some through stoning,
while some simply through the means of rolling the eyeballs.
certain views shouldnt be trap,
just like a bird in the cage,
when the view of the world is limited to the views outside the cage,
free from the cage and things will be different.
--- " gosh ... nonsense again ...
wonder is situations part of the ingredients to make bonds stronger between humans ?
mr sore throat is here to visit my throat. -_-"'
nice music: smile of tears.
---- " ---- adios 07may@1110hrs
need to change his stroke totally. it will take quite sometimes. gosh.
oh welll... time to squeeze more brain juice to think about stuffs, ideas and future.
a step back and u ll see.
take a step back,
things will be view differently,
ideas will be generate creatively,
and solutions will emerge out unknowingly.
at times of fustration,
it calm u down,
clear things out,
and enable u to react more appropriately.
there are many ways of doing it,
some through slping,
some through stoning,
while some simply through the means of rolling the eyeballs.
certain views shouldnt be trap,
just like a bird in the cage,
when the view of the world is limited to the views outside the cage,
free from the cage and things will be different.
--- " gosh ... nonsense again ...
wonder is situations part of the ingredients to make bonds stronger between humans ?
mr sore throat is here to visit my throat. -_-"'
nice music: smile of tears.
---- " ---- adios 07may@1110hrs
Friday, June 04, 2010
4jun. fri. sunny orange
'There is no limit to love's forbearance, to its trust, its hope, its power to endure.' - seriously like this quote from fortune cookie =)
Almost unable to make it on time this evening after soo much unforesee things. phew. lucky enuff. =)
after soo long and now i am towing manikin again. gosh i tot i couldn do it, but oh well, i did it, thou not fast but well...
tues, wed, thu, fri + tmr sat, it will be 5 day consecutive 'sun ing' session. gosh, i am turning far too 'black'(not brown), and that V neck tan .. gosh.
'i am glad u are around to brighten up the sky' =)
good luck to her and them for the friendly comp with AC and NTU tmr ! =)
---- " ----
02jun. wed. breezy blue
did some stuffs that based purely on the sudden urge, becos 'feeling say so'. something which i will seldom do? =) 'u know i know we know'.
simple equation, u + me = we = us = :)
---- " ----
'There is no limit to love's forbearance, to its trust, its hope, its power to endure.' - seriously like this quote from fortune cookie =)
Almost unable to make it on time this evening after soo much unforesee things. phew. lucky enuff. =)
after soo long and now i am towing manikin again. gosh i tot i couldn do it, but oh well, i did it, thou not fast but well...
tues, wed, thu, fri + tmr sat, it will be 5 day consecutive 'sun ing' session. gosh, i am turning far too 'black'(not brown), and that V neck tan .. gosh.
'i am glad u are around to brighten up the sky' =)
good luck to her and them for the friendly comp with AC and NTU tmr ! =)
---- " ----
02jun. wed. breezy blue
did some stuffs that based purely on the sudden urge, becos 'feeling say so'. something which i will seldom do? =) 'u know i know we know'.
simple equation, u + me = we = us = :)
---- " ----
Thursday, May 27, 2010
27may. thu. blue breeze.
wanted to but choose another.
- wanted to swim in the morning, but ended up swimming in the evening.
- wanted to ride but forgot to take coupon + lazy to go up = take bus la ! (it's near anyway)
- wanted to eat here but saw him, so went to another coffee shop.
- wanted to go lib but lazy, sooo another day la uh.
wanted to , but didnt...
goooshhh. i am watching kong zi movie, certainly it's not exciting but it's .
it makes me ponder, ren dao, li yi, blah blah, but something for sure is that i totally agree on his teachings. dont know why too .
'in reality, there's always kindness and also cruelity'
'on a see-saw, if u are here, then i will always be there on the other side'
---- " ----- 27may2240hrs
wanted to but choose another.
- wanted to swim in the morning, but ended up swimming in the evening.
- wanted to ride but forgot to take coupon + lazy to go up = take bus la ! (it's near anyway)
- wanted to eat here but saw him, so went to another coffee shop.
- wanted to go lib but lazy, sooo another day la uh.
wanted to , but didnt...
goooshhh. i am watching kong zi movie, certainly it's not exciting but it's .
it makes me ponder, ren dao, li yi, blah blah, but something for sure is that i totally agree on his teachings. dont know why too .
'in reality, there's always kindness and also cruelity'
'on a see-saw, if u are here, then i will always be there on the other side'
---- " ----- 27may2240hrs
Wednesday, May 26, 2010
26may, wed, grey grey dull dull
it's such simple logic yet i need someone to make me realise that, ' being nice is one thing, being silly is another. pls don be silly. ' thanks Pranav for that =)
this actually makes me ponder for really long, somehow or rather have the urge of sitting alone at the seaside to do some reflection.
i realize sometimes, or rather most of the time, i didn't notice the line between silly and nice. though i have once tell myself that, i will only help people who needs help and not those who want help.
thinking back, i felt silly for somethings i did in the past.
sometimes, being care is much easier than to care i suppose, at least less brain juice is being squeeze and method or styles varies from one to another. sometimes u wants to care but it's just that u have no idea how to go about it. oh well is that any book title 'art of caring' ?!
gosh! thermostat indicator = rising, water tank level = low, sneeze sneeze sneeze, itch throat ... my body is weird nowadays, cold shower + more fluid. - weather + diet + activities to blame i suppose.
---- " ---- 26may2249h
it's such simple logic yet i need someone to make me realise that, ' being nice is one thing, being silly is another. pls don be silly. ' thanks Pranav for that =)
this actually makes me ponder for really long, somehow or rather have the urge of sitting alone at the seaside to do some reflection.
i realize sometimes, or rather most of the time, i didn't notice the line between silly and nice. though i have once tell myself that, i will only help people who needs help and not those who want help.
thinking back, i felt silly for somethings i did in the past.
sometimes, being care is much easier than to care i suppose, at least less brain juice is being squeeze and method or styles varies from one to another. sometimes u wants to care but it's just that u have no idea how to go about it. oh well is that any book title 'art of caring' ?!
gosh! thermostat indicator = rising, water tank level = low, sneeze sneeze sneeze, itch throat ... my body is weird nowadays, cold shower + more fluid. - weather + diet + activities to blame i suppose.
---- " ---- 26may2249h
Friday, May 21, 2010
21may. fri. purple cloud
gosh! how could human's decision or reaction change so drastically according to his mood? lucky he's on good mood today. oh well, that's life.
sometimes, no matter how much you do in life, it just didnt beat the impression given/ potray to others.
well well, i suppose it's my turn to say 'you are getting me confuse'... well i hope to get a SUPER-BIG radar to read your thoughts and a ULTRA-SENSITIVE heart rate monitor to sense how you feel. omg! i am typing junks over here.
alot people says, fairy tales doesnt exist in reality, well well agree agree to a certain extend.
but still everyones have their very own 'fairy-tales' in their life.
but oh well, like what's commonly said, it takes 2 hands to clap, 2 hands to hold. do we need a chat over this?
there will always be expectations which were not state out/ stated out that are not fulfills, it will cause dissapointment. how i hope i have the confident to say it out, 'i wouldnt dissapoint u / u guys/ people around me.'
few moments i forgot, then i recalled when i was brushing teeth, and now it's forgotten agn !! my STM level just upgraded by itself ..
alright i just realise i am writing junks for this entry.
---- " ---- 0021hrs22may.
gosh! how could human's decision or reaction change so drastically according to his mood? lucky he's on good mood today. oh well, that's life.
sometimes, no matter how much you do in life, it just didnt beat the impression given/ potray to others.
well well, i suppose it's my turn to say 'you are getting me confuse'... well i hope to get a SUPER-BIG radar to read your thoughts and a ULTRA-SENSITIVE heart rate monitor to sense how you feel. omg! i am typing junks over here.
alot people says, fairy tales doesnt exist in reality, well well agree agree to a certain extend.
but still everyones have their very own 'fairy-tales' in their life.
but oh well, like what's commonly said, it takes 2 hands to clap, 2 hands to hold. do we need a chat over this?
there will always be expectations which were not state out/ stated out that are not fulfills, it will cause dissapointment. how i hope i have the confident to say it out, 'i wouldnt dissapoint u / u guys/ people around me.'
few moments i forgot, then i recalled when i was brushing teeth, and now it's forgotten agn !! my STM level just upgraded by itself ..
alright i just realise i am writing junks for this entry.
---- " ---- 0021hrs22may.
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
19may. Wed. red clouds
gosh. seriously i got no idea how to handle them for being rude, no-manners and now even making decision without asking ? alright i am not refering to all, it's always the same few. alright i suppose i failed to perform my secondary role well ? issit gen gap? (but they are the same age of mine) or issit that things differ as the batches diff ?
I seriously hate the feeling of being stuck in-between. c gives probs, a 'sqeeze' b agn, then b 'suck it up', then 'squeeze' the minimal of c. nv wants to take disciplinary actions on them, or rather believes that things shouldn be working that way. that's life, somehow being 'nice' to others means being 'mean' to urself.
shall figure out some ways to make things better. every problem given is a chance to learn and improve ya ?
and yes, i dislike this organisation by itself, after knowing more things. well guess my mates were right for saying me simple minded, after 'detach' from 'their side' and bother about things on my side.
alright, enough whining. yawns.
whining are good way to de-stress, i suppose.
after u whine, u left ur feelings here and carry on.
alright i just forgot what i was thinking a few moment ago in spilt sec. yawns aging, aging.
---- " ---- 19may2156hrs
gosh. seriously i got no idea how to handle them for being rude, no-manners and now even making decision without asking ? alright i am not refering to all, it's always the same few. alright i suppose i failed to perform my secondary role well ? issit gen gap? (but they are the same age of mine) or issit that things differ as the batches diff ?
I seriously hate the feeling of being stuck in-between. c gives probs, a 'sqeeze' b agn, then b 'suck it up', then 'squeeze' the minimal of c. nv wants to take disciplinary actions on them, or rather believes that things shouldn be working that way. that's life, somehow being 'nice' to others means being 'mean' to urself.
shall figure out some ways to make things better. every problem given is a chance to learn and improve ya ?
and yes, i dislike this organisation by itself, after knowing more things. well guess my mates were right for saying me simple minded, after 'detach' from 'their side' and bother about things on my side.
alright, enough whining. yawns.
whining are good way to de-stress, i suppose.
after u whine, u left ur feelings here and carry on.
alright i just forgot what i was thinking a few moment ago in spilt sec. yawns aging, aging.
---- " ---- 19may2156hrs
Tuesday, May 18, 2010
17may. mon. na.
haha well well, it's just another cupid's prank's prank.
let's face it, if that's the fact then get over it ya ?pls dont feel bad or whatsoever and really really pls don bother or think about it anymore, since it has become the past. it will be better for you and me then =)
everyone make mistakes rite? u and i do make mistakes too. at least you have told me the situation before more complications comes in. =)
no worries, be happy, everything will be alright. smile =D
that's life, my destiny.
---- " ----
haha well well, it's just another cupid's prank's prank.
let's face it, if that's the fact then get over it ya ?pls dont feel bad or whatsoever and really really pls don bother or think about it anymore, since it has become the past. it will be better for you and me then =)
everyone make mistakes rite? u and i do make mistakes too. at least you have told me the situation before more complications comes in. =)
no worries, be happy, everything will be alright. smile =D
that's life, my destiny.
---- " ----
Sunday, May 16, 2010
16may. sun. purple cloud
-----
it's just another cupid's prank i suppose? or that's life ?
Alright, i know what i should do, since i have opened the door and put my foot in the quicksand ...
*sigh* if only things were much simpler. but oh well nvm, cupid's prank, ll just do my best for all the ships.
.leaves.
here are some nonsense thoughts of mine while sitting on the train.
there was a myth saying that under this particular tree, if it's fallen leaf(brown) falls onto you, your wish will come true. if it's green then no.
upon knowing this, this guy decided to give it a try.
he stood under a tree, waiting for a fallen leaf to fall on him...
after 3 hrs of waiting,
he thought *there's not enough wind today, shall try again tomorrow*.
Then the moment he took a step off the spot he was standing, a gush of wind came and a piece of leave fall on the particular spot,
he sighed, 'nevermind, shall wait longer tomorrow'.
- 2nd day
same thing took a chair and sat under the tree.
it was a windy day, so he thought *more wind more leave more luck! just like the ad ' more birds more luck'*
after 5 hours of waiting
true enough, there were leaves falling but out of all only 2 (green) fall on him.
*i shall wait abit longer.* he told himself.
there the sun set, he gave up and left.
- 3rd day
he reached before sunrise, hoping that with a longer period of waiting time will increase his chances.
wind blow, leaves fall, brown leaves didnt fall onto him.
then a passerby came, the wind blew and brown leaf landed on her shoulder.
with his silly thought, he said 'today shall be the day ! since she got it !'
but he didnt got it.
- 4th day
same time, same place
being ignorance, he thought logically 'should i shift location ? but since this location havent had any fallen brown leave, this location should have higher probability then others.'
he was determined and remain at the same place.
- 3 months later
some passerby got it, some didnt.
he asked the tree 'mr tree, after 3 months of waiting why didnt any ur brown leaves fall onto me ?'
then the tree said 'because according to physic and newton laws, with wind +- 123 and leaves on location xy it will land on here and there ... only when wind +4 on direction a, b or c then it will land on ur location, but then now only a is brown sooo 1 of soooo many ... blah blah blah .'
being tired and angry. he stood up and walk away, then just right at that moment a brown leaf fall onto him... 'finally...' he smiled and understood.
--- " --- 16may0045hrs.
-----
it's just another cupid's prank i suppose? or that's life ?
Alright, i know what i should do, since i have opened the door and put my foot in the quicksand ...
*sigh* if only things were much simpler. but oh well nvm, cupid's prank, ll just do my best for all the ships.
.leaves.
here are some nonsense thoughts of mine while sitting on the train.
there was a myth saying that under this particular tree, if it's fallen leaf(brown) falls onto you, your wish will come true. if it's green then no.
upon knowing this, this guy decided to give it a try.
he stood under a tree, waiting for a fallen leaf to fall on him...
after 3 hrs of waiting,
he thought *there's not enough wind today, shall try again tomorrow*.
Then the moment he took a step off the spot he was standing, a gush of wind came and a piece of leave fall on the particular spot,
he sighed, 'nevermind, shall wait longer tomorrow'.
- 2nd day
same thing took a chair and sat under the tree.
it was a windy day, so he thought *more wind more leave more luck! just like the ad ' more birds more luck'*
after 5 hours of waiting
true enough, there were leaves falling but out of all only 2 (green) fall on him.
*i shall wait abit longer.* he told himself.
there the sun set, he gave up and left.
- 3rd day
he reached before sunrise, hoping that with a longer period of waiting time will increase his chances.
wind blow, leaves fall, brown leaves didnt fall onto him.
then a passerby came, the wind blew and brown leaf landed on her shoulder.
with his silly thought, he said 'today shall be the day ! since she got it !'
but he didnt got it.
- 4th day
same time, same place
being ignorance, he thought logically 'should i shift location ? but since this location havent had any fallen brown leave, this location should have higher probability then others.'
he was determined and remain at the same place.
- 3 months later
some passerby got it, some didnt.
he asked the tree 'mr tree, after 3 months of waiting why didnt any ur brown leaves fall onto me ?'
then the tree said 'because according to physic and newton laws, with wind +- 123 and leaves on location xy it will land on here and there ... only when wind +4 on direction a, b or c then it will land on ur location, but then now only a is brown sooo 1 of soooo many ... blah blah blah .'
being tired and angry. he stood up and walk away, then just right at that moment a brown leaf fall onto him... 'finally...' he smiled and understood.
--- " --- 16may0045hrs.
Friday, May 14, 2010
14may. fri. purple cloud
few moment ago, somemore said, 'more sai, more zai' which i agree, but then sometimes in the world of 'darkness'/ reality, it is 'more act, more 'zai' '.
few days ago, someone said 'i wish could be like bob .... .... simple minded .... ... '
few years ago, one of my working senior said, 'welcome to the world of complexity =)'
but still, i ll still stick to what i believes and adhere to.
--- " ---
there are soo many questions and what if s...
but oh well, why think so much ? sld thinking simple be the way ?
*'forget about those remarks, u are great yourself, just be yourself' - the team thinks so too, i suppose majority of the team are with U! so =)"
few moment ago, somemore said, 'more sai, more zai' which i agree, but then sometimes in the world of 'darkness'/ reality, it is 'more act, more 'zai' '.
few days ago, someone said 'i wish could be like bob .... .... simple minded .... ... '
few years ago, one of my working senior said, 'welcome to the world of complexity =)'
but still, i ll still stick to what i believes and adhere to.
--- " ---
there are soo many questions and what if s...
but oh well, why think so much ? sld thinking simple be the way ?
*'forget about those remarks, u are great yourself, just be yourself' - the team thinks so too, i suppose majority of the team are with U! so =)"
Thursday, May 13, 2010
13may. thu. idk .
glad some of them knows the limit =) though there were still some minority demanding for more.
almost boarded the wrong bus , little did i realise the signage of the bus no. have swapped place until another bus arrived .gosh! what have gotten into my mind.
hmm, wonders.
feels like keeping quiet.
--- 2341hrs1305
glad some of them knows the limit =) though there were still some minority demanding for more.
almost boarded the wrong bus , little did i realise the signage of the bus no. have swapped place until another bus arrived .gosh! what have gotten into my mind.
hmm, wonders.
feels like keeping quiet.
--- 2341hrs1305
Monday, May 10, 2010
10may. mon. purple cloud.
it's just how amazing things could happen when paths met.
rain = take bus = go makan at coffee shop = met my primary sch buddy's mum
just when u look back, u realise how fast time files.
----"----
On the train, I think and ponder, 1st, 2nd, 3rd ...
ta boleh tahan liao, shall lay some of my private thoughts out here.
true or false ?
if it's really really true then what am i suppose to do ? step forward ? backward? stand still? i have decided on a decision myself, but oh well...
alright i am getting too comfortable with this person. but ...
if it's true then it will somehow or rather that it's similar to 1st and 3rd, but in different aspects i suppose. the people, the situations, the solution/ decision.
tried to find the most suitable solution, may it be selfish ones, better ones but still things somehow or rather yi bei ju shou chang. the truth is - there is no perfect solution to it.
the truth is, if it's true then i am not as good as what u think, there's too many flaws in me.
why others lead a simple life, not getting into these messy situations while some will always encounter such complicated situations. how i wish things could be simpler.
mr fortune teller, tell me my fortune will u?
mr counselor, tell me the most appropriate solution will u?
mr consequence, tell me the consequence of all possible steps will u?
ooooh well... L policy.. troublesome as always.
--- " ---
everyone have weakness, for me, being indecisive and unconfident are always the biggest 2. and .... STM where things are always forgotten..
well here i am confuse too. tell me true or false .
well well, thats life.
well well well good night. CS in few hrs time ..
--- " --- 11may0058hrs
it's just how amazing things could happen when paths met.
rain = take bus = go makan at coffee shop = met my primary sch buddy's mum
just when u look back, u realise how fast time files.
----"----
On the train, I think and ponder, 1st, 2nd, 3rd ...
ta boleh tahan liao, shall lay some of my private thoughts out here.
true or false ?
if it's really really true then what am i suppose to do ? step forward ? backward? stand still? i have decided on a decision myself, but oh well...
alright i am getting too comfortable with this person. but ...
if it's true then it will somehow or rather that it's similar to 1st and 3rd, but in different aspects i suppose. the people, the situations, the solution/ decision.
tried to find the most suitable solution, may it be selfish ones, better ones but still things somehow or rather yi bei ju shou chang. the truth is - there is no perfect solution to it.
the truth is, if it's true then i am not as good as what u think, there's too many flaws in me.
why others lead a simple life, not getting into these messy situations while some will always encounter such complicated situations. how i wish things could be simpler.
mr fortune teller, tell me my fortune will u?
mr counselor, tell me the most appropriate solution will u?
mr consequence, tell me the consequence of all possible steps will u?
ooooh well... L policy.. troublesome as always.
--- " ---
everyone have weakness, for me, being indecisive and unconfident are always the biggest 2. and .... STM where things are always forgotten..
well here i am confuse too. tell me true or false .
well well, thats life.
well well well good night. CS in few hrs time ..
--- " --- 11may0058hrs
Sunday, May 09, 2010
09may. sun. windy blue
----"-----
finally ! i can smell it !! 91 days more to go ! hahha free from the liability ! 3 mths !
i woke up with a feeling that 'alright, another rejection this year' such a strong feeling... ok anyway i shldn look forward in the slimmmm chance of getting in.
alright i suppose i shall put this aside and look over to other alternative which will serve the similar purpose i want to achieve in life.
there come to the same dilemma , $$ vs interest, goverment sector (hospital, para medic) or private sector (drug processing)... well well 3 mths
i suppose i not giving up yet, shall try 1 more time, so shall work for 1 year first then see how. dead stubborn uh ? hahha
---
looking out at those vegetation and sky, it just makes me wonder my 'aspect' as a good leader.
though it's like model answer, but oh well ...
- lead by example
- fight for the well being or unfair treatment
- giving clear direction and instruction
- earn trust and respect in them
yup gonna change. more firm.
---"---
my mother day's gift = packing kitchen =x hahhaha
gosh! on batt, and it's gg low ! adios
there's so much i want to type it out but well, i forgot due to STM =x
------ 10may0021hrs
----"-----
finally ! i can smell it !! 91 days more to go ! hahha free from the liability ! 3 mths !
i woke up with a feeling that 'alright, another rejection this year' such a strong feeling... ok anyway i shldn look forward in the slimmmm chance of getting in.
alright i suppose i shall put this aside and look over to other alternative which will serve the similar purpose i want to achieve in life.
there come to the same dilemma , $$ vs interest, goverment sector (hospital, para medic) or private sector (drug processing)... well well 3 mths
i suppose i not giving up yet, shall try 1 more time, so shall work for 1 year first then see how. dead stubborn uh ? hahha
---
looking out at those vegetation and sky, it just makes me wonder my 'aspect' as a good leader.
though it's like model answer, but oh well ...
- lead by example
- fight for the well being or unfair treatment
- giving clear direction and instruction
- earn trust and respect in them
yup gonna change. more firm.
---"---
my mother day's gift = packing kitchen =x hahhaha
gosh! on batt, and it's gg low ! adios
there's so much i want to type it out but well, i forgot due to STM =x
------ 10may0021hrs
Thursday, May 06, 2010
06may. thu. still wind
---
likes barber/hairdresser who are meticulous about your hair .
this was the second shop that i patronise with the hair dresser being so particular about the minor detail of ur hair. Well it's just hair, why bother to be so particular about it? i suppose it's the hair dresser, well well it's the efforts that count. =)
---
1 x update + 1 x 'un- inform' info ... = changes needed = working outside office hrs = =(
it's isnt that i am petty about doing work at home, but these things could have been avoided, by having information passed down properly. that last min update is understandable but but but the 'un-inform' info could have 'kill' ppl tmr ...
no ones like last min changes, i suppose. look on the good side will be at least i know it just now (7pm) than tmr morning (which will be really wtfish!).
actually things wldn be soo troublesome if we just follow the 'format', keep using those who are more hardworking, but it all come down to the consideration of practicality, fairness and welfare. well well well, it might not be the best but still at least it's better .
some old thoughts strike me again: ' same pa*, same ran*, why do some have to do more?'
well well, that's life i suppose. haiz just 'do more, learn more' ...
--- 2309hrs06052010
---
likes barber/hairdresser who are meticulous about your hair .
this was the second shop that i patronise with the hair dresser being so particular about the minor detail of ur hair. Well it's just hair, why bother to be so particular about it? i suppose it's the hair dresser, well well it's the efforts that count. =)
---
1 x update + 1 x 'un- inform' info ... = changes needed = working outside office hrs = =(
it's isnt that i am petty about doing work at home, but these things could have been avoided, by having information passed down properly. that last min update is understandable but but but the 'un-inform' info could have 'kill' ppl tmr ...
no ones like last min changes, i suppose. look on the good side will be at least i know it just now (7pm) than tmr morning (which will be really wtfish!).
actually things wldn be soo troublesome if we just follow the 'format', keep using those who are more hardworking, but it all come down to the consideration of practicality, fairness and welfare. well well well, it might not be the best but still at least it's better .
some old thoughts strike me again: ' same pa*, same ran*, why do some have to do more?'
well well, that's life i suppose. haiz just 'do more, learn more' ...
--- 2309hrs06052010
Monday, May 03, 2010
3may. mon. -
---"---
someone told me this. i find it interesting.
not exactly the same as told, as i forgot here and there due to STM ..
x: is this the right one?
cupid: yes! this is the right one!
x: -_-''', but u also said the same thing when i asked u about previous one! (when it turn out not to be the right one)
cupid:well it's the right one, but i didnt said that there wouldnt be another one =x
x: .... ... then will there be another RIGHT one ?????!!
cupid: well that will be a SURPRISE =D
cupid thoughts: well u will have experience through all this right one inorder to meet the RIGHT one ...
--- " ---
there isnt a fullproof solutions to some of the problems, somethings have to be compromised in order to achieve certain things, u just cant achieve everything. tat's life ..
--- " ---
at this point onward, some part of the history will repeat itself while some will not.
little did i realised i have just fallen into a pit unknowingly while walking through this stretch of road. ... that's life ...
3 = (-2 -1) = (x3, 2.1 =?)
-- " -- 0014hrs040510 adios
---"---
someone told me this. i find it interesting.
not exactly the same as told, as i forgot here and there due to STM ..
x: is this the right one?
cupid: yes! this is the right one!
x: -_-''', but u also said the same thing when i asked u about previous one! (when it turn out not to be the right one)
cupid:well it's the right one, but i didnt said that there wouldnt be another one =x
x: .... ... then will there be another RIGHT one ?????!!
cupid: well that will be a SURPRISE =D
cupid thoughts: well u will have experience through all this right one inorder to meet the RIGHT one ...
--- " ---
there isnt a fullproof solutions to some of the problems, somethings have to be compromised in order to achieve certain things, u just cant achieve everything. tat's life ..
--- " ---
at this point onward, some part of the history will repeat itself while some will not.
little did i realised i have just fallen into a pit unknowingly while walking through this stretch of road. ... that's life ...
3 = (-2 -1) = (x3, 2.1 =?)
-- " -- 0014hrs040510 adios
Monday, April 26, 2010
26apr. mon. cloudy purple
--"--
distanced from my fellow camp buddies,
cause we are on a different route,
and now we are doing differnt scope of duties, i suppose ...
my indecisiveness drag others down,
some of my decisions got others into trouble,
i thought things would be better if i could just follow what i believes. but that wldn work in reality.
how great things will be if everything i can just settle alone,
where no ones will be affected,
where there's only one to blame.
--"--
tell me sld i or sld i not ..
.i need to speak to 3 person dot. wu^ .
---"---2357hrs2604
'when paths met, choices set, that's life.'
--"--
distanced from my fellow camp buddies,
cause we are on a different route,
and now we are doing differnt scope of duties, i suppose ...
my indecisiveness drag others down,
some of my decisions got others into trouble,
i thought things would be better if i could just follow what i believes. but that wldn work in reality.
how great things will be if everything i can just settle alone,
where no ones will be affected,
where there's only one to blame.
--"--
tell me sld i or sld i not ..
.i need to speak to 3 person dot. wu^ .
---"---2357hrs2604
'when paths met, choices set, that's life.'
Thursday, April 22, 2010
22apr. thu. still wind
happy / anger
mixed emotions
Handles different people everyday, some were friendly, while some were rude. well well that's life.
unhappy about things happening around. apple vs pear, oranges vs peach, they can never be compare on par, it will never be fair. it's always that minority (or sld i say there's only 1, idk). Just here to do the things which i believes is right.
it will be good to have a pat on my shoulder with a smile saying, 'thank you very much'.
---"---
.Genuine Smile.
A smile a day keep the dark away,
It's a simple facial expression which indicates,
the sign of gratitude,
the sign of appreciation,
and the sign of recognition.
it's a communicate of feeling which is,
a display of happiness,
a display of contentment,
a display of amusement.
a smile should never be underestimate as,
a smile of one inspires others smile,
a smile of one brighten up others day,
a smile of one bond one another closer together.
If's isnt that bad afterall with smiles around =D.
---- ~ ---- 23apr0019hrs
happy / anger
mixed emotions
Handles different people everyday, some were friendly, while some were rude. well well that's life.
unhappy about things happening around. apple vs pear, oranges vs peach, they can never be compare on par, it will never be fair. it's always that minority (or sld i say there's only 1, idk). Just here to do the things which i believes is right.
it will be good to have a pat on my shoulder with a smile saying, 'thank you very much'.
---"---
.Genuine Smile.
A smile a day keep the dark away,
It's a simple facial expression which indicates,
the sign of gratitude,
the sign of appreciation,
and the sign of recognition.
it's a communicate of feeling which is,
a display of happiness,
a display of contentment,
a display of amusement.
a smile should never be underestimate as,
a smile of one inspires others smile,
a smile of one brighten up others day,
a smile of one bond one another closer together.
If's isnt that bad afterall with smiles around =D.
---- ~ ---- 23apr0019hrs
Wednesday, April 21, 2010
21apr. wed. red cloud
admins, welfares/ rights(top n bottom considerations), sai gangs (some doesnt within my scoop), politics (which i have been avoiding everywhere) ... everythings makes me troubled and this is just the start to the last stretch of my journey in ...
Just take it as a learning experiences. the more u see, the more u know, the more u handle, the more u'll be better.
when there's peace people makes trouble, when there's chaos then people learn to appreciate peace. *sighs*
'cant u just stop stepping in and making unecessary noises?' u guys are ok now, so why not let's just have 'peacetime' tgt, instead having people disliking u ?
--- ~ --- 21apr2253hrs
admins, welfares/ rights(top n bottom considerations), sai gangs (some doesnt within my scoop), politics (which i have been avoiding everywhere) ... everythings makes me troubled and this is just the start to the last stretch of my journey in ...
Just take it as a learning experiences. the more u see, the more u know, the more u handle, the more u'll be better.
when there's peace people makes trouble, when there's chaos then people learn to appreciate peace. *sighs*
'cant u just stop stepping in and making unecessary noises?' u guys are ok now, so why not let's just have 'peacetime' tgt, instead having people disliking u ?
--- ~ --- 21apr2253hrs
Monday, April 19, 2010
19apr. mon. purple clouds.
Sort of like this phase.
'But you WILL know,
you will feel it within your heart;
you will feel it within your soul;
you will feel it within every fibre of your Being when the steps that you take are leading you in the direction that is right for you at that time.'
- http://www.innerlightworkers.co.uk/archangels/azrael.htm
wants to know more about 'archangel azrael' - angel of death.
wants to improve on his swimming =(
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~|20apr0014hrs
Sort of like this phase.
'But you WILL know,
you will feel it within your heart;
you will feel it within your soul;
you will feel it within every fibre of your Being when the steps that you take are leading you in the direction that is right for you at that time.'
- http://www.innerlightworkers.co.uk/archangels/azrael.htm
wants to know more about 'archangel azrael' - angel of death.
wants to improve on his swimming =(
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~|20apr0014hrs
Sunday, April 18, 2010
18apr. sun. purple clouds
-final pin of hope is gg to be dash in 2 mths time. well by 'betting' on something which is 90% not feasible, disappointment should be expected. oh well at least i tried for a possible miricle to happen. Time to resign to destiny. Some path are just meant to be choosen. Looking at all my fellow dbio mates choosen busniness studies over science, it makes me wonder ... ... it's just like leading a life for others / self in my point.
-both fun and emo night for ytd. just when other pouring out their pain and sorrow, I just cant find the reason to why there were some leading a sorrowful life, while some leading a smooth without much obstacles life.
- hope history dont repeat itself. i got no idea what's best to handle such situation.
--- : 18apr1158hrs
-final pin of hope is gg to be dash in 2 mths time. well by 'betting' on something which is 90% not feasible, disappointment should be expected. oh well at least i tried for a possible miricle to happen. Time to resign to destiny. Some path are just meant to be choosen. Looking at all my fellow dbio mates choosen busniness studies over science, it makes me wonder ... ... it's just like leading a life for others / self in my point.
-both fun and emo night for ytd. just when other pouring out their pain and sorrow, I just cant find the reason to why there were some leading a sorrowful life, while some leading a smooth without much obstacles life.
- hope history dont repeat itself. i got no idea what's best to handle such situation.
--- : 18apr1158hrs
Friday, April 16, 2010
16apr. sat. cloudy grey
- just 4x spoonful of spoiled cake = 5x visiting toilet more tmr ? hope not.
- sometimes i wonder am i fighting for the right thing. fairness for them. i am so afraid that i fight for the wrong thing. But still we are the one who have to fight for their rights, if we dont then who will?
- stone, stone, stone. i hope history will not repeat itself.
- it's have been a very long time ever since i experience the blood gushing around my face feeling. shows that i am working hard enough hahaha
- I cant find an appropriate reason to go for still water trg without my kakis.
- still can feel the twitching pain ard left ankle since mar from drill boots, but it's improving.
- - -
time to rest. take a break.
17apr0017hrs.
- just 4x spoonful of spoiled cake = 5x visiting toilet more tmr ? hope not.
- sometimes i wonder am i fighting for the right thing. fairness for them. i am so afraid that i fight for the wrong thing. But still we are the one who have to fight for their rights, if we dont then who will?
- stone, stone, stone. i hope history will not repeat itself.
- it's have been a very long time ever since i experience the blood gushing around my face feeling. shows that i am working hard enough hahaha
- I cant find an appropriate reason to go for still water trg without my kakis.
- still can feel the twitching pain ard left ankle since mar from drill boots, but it's improving.
- - -
time to rest. take a break.
17apr0017hrs.
Wednesday, April 14, 2010
14apr. wed. breezy blue
rush rush rush, fight fight fight, ... to complete things, to get fairness, to attain mutual agreement... somehow or rather ... got so tired ...
almost BANG ! not once but twice on the road, both due to driver changing lanes abruptly. 1 x lorry + 1 x car .. one in the morning, one in the evening ..
sort of feeling more relieved today. lighter burden =)
like the feelings of swimming today. the water + chlorine + feel.
--- " ---
rush rush rush, fight fight fight, ... to complete things, to get fairness, to attain mutual agreement... somehow or rather ... got so tired ...
almost BANG ! not once but twice on the road, both due to driver changing lanes abruptly. 1 x lorry + 1 x car .. one in the morning, one in the evening ..
sort of feeling more relieved today. lighter burden =)
like the feelings of swimming today. the water + chlorine + feel.
--- " ---
Monday, April 12, 2010
12apr. mon. purple culumbus clouds
As what i foresee previously, this week is gg to be a super !@#$% =( week... today is just the start of it ... and signs are appearing... haiz ... the picture shall be my spokeperson on how i exactly felt this afternoon. My mistakes for making wrong decisions as informations didnt pass down at all. not once, but ..... Take it as an experiences, as a lesson then i will know how to handle it in the future.
the responsibilities/duties are surely something that's heavy. I took it up, suck them up but still more are coming. some are even totally unrelated to me. oh well that's life. everyone only know what they saw/heard, everyone only knows bits and pieces of it.
this sunday = boring ! need to find self entertainment, as most(actually only 3 or mayb more?) of my khakis will be at oversea, germany, china some donno where donnoe where ... so next 2 weekks = BORING.
who shall i turn to ? Seriously not feeling emotionally well today . hopefully tomorrow will be a better day.
think +ve ... it will be over sooonnn
---- : ----
I almost forget my eldest bro bd is TMR! when it's stated on my calendar -_-"' .
Thanks Uncle Dad for things he gave, really appreciate, shall repay bits by bits when i start working. just when i am feeling __,he rang me and just so happen that i was just walking home near his car.
--- : ---
that's all folk ..
As what i foresee previously, this week is gg to be a super !@#$% =( week... today is just the start of it ... and signs are appearing... haiz ... the picture shall be my spokeperson on how i exactly felt this afternoon. My mistakes for making wrong decisions as informations didnt pass down at all. not once, but ..... Take it as an experiences, as a lesson then i will know how to handle it in the future.
the responsibilities/duties are surely something that's heavy. I took it up, suck them up but still more are coming. some are even totally unrelated to me. oh well that's life. everyone only know what they saw/heard, everyone only knows bits and pieces of it.
this sunday = boring ! need to find self entertainment, as most(actually only 3 or mayb more?) of my khakis will be at oversea, germany, china some donno where donnoe where ... so next 2 weekks = BORING.
who shall i turn to ? Seriously not feeling emotionally well today . hopefully tomorrow will be a better day.
think +ve ... it will be over sooonnn
---- : ----
I almost forget my eldest bro bd is TMR! when it's stated on my calendar -_-"' .
Thanks Uncle Dad for things he gave, really appreciate, shall repay bits by bits when i start working. just when i am feeling __,he rang me and just so happen that i was just walking home near his car.
--- : ---
that's all folk ..
Sunday, April 11, 2010
11apr. sun. still wind
sit down,(uncle board) stand up, (2 - 3 seats avalible) sit down agn, (aunty board) stand up, (almost empty cabin) haiya don sit liao la! hahaha (that's what happened on the train today... sometimes how i wish i can ignore their presence as i am not on a 'priority seats' =x )
gym w mr WH, omg weight still the same . sianzation.
forgot what i want to wrote initially ... so shall start my nonsense.
---" ---
dim. feelings as string of integers
dim sad as 1, emo as 2, smile as 3, happy as 4
dim sequence in note
note:
2 not equal 1
1 equal 2
3 not = 4
4 = 3
2,4 might be due to work or bonds or personal
conclusion = mixed
end.comment
--- " ---
L policy (nonsense)
L is a good policy,
it gave one strength,confident, smiles and comfort
L is a bad policy,
it gave one tears, worries , anger and sad
Still whether is it good or bad, it's up to the one who handle it and sees it.
*only get the policy when things are appropriate and chemistry are right. so it's best not to get it when one is not ready.
more nonsense ...here's a 'curse' or love web, which have been happening around us and evloving around us since our(human) era ? that's why true love exist only 1 in a 1000. lol jkjk
--- " ---
enuff of nonsense and de stressing...
sometimes i just like to do things purely base on feeling, without any logical reasoning...
---- ' ----
adios
sit down,(uncle board) stand up, (2 - 3 seats avalible) sit down agn, (aunty board) stand up, (almost empty cabin) haiya don sit liao la! hahaha (that's what happened on the train today... sometimes how i wish i can ignore their presence as i am not on a 'priority seats' =x )
gym w mr WH, omg weight still the same . sianzation.
forgot what i want to wrote initially ... so shall start my nonsense.
---" ---
dim. feelings as string of integers
dim sad as 1, emo as 2, smile as 3, happy as 4
dim sequence in note
note:
2 not equal 1
1 equal 2
3 not = 4
4 = 3
2,4 might be due to work or bonds or personal
conclusion = mixed
end.comment
--- " ---
L policy (nonsense)
L is a good policy,
it gave one strength,confident, smiles and comfort
L is a bad policy,
it gave one tears, worries , anger and sad
Still whether is it good or bad, it's up to the one who handle it and sees it.
*only get the policy when things are appropriate and chemistry are right. so it's best not to get it when one is not ready.
more nonsense ...here's a 'curse' or love web, which have been happening around us and evloving around us since our(human) era ? that's why true love exist only 1 in a 1000. lol jkjk
--- " ---
enuff of nonsense and de stressing...
sometimes i just like to do things purely base on feeling, without any logical reasoning...
---- ' ----
adios
10apr. sat. still wind
Soo starting ... from the morning rite from 6am where i drag myself soooo hard out of my bed, and finally after 20mins of determination ... i got out of it. realising that things i thot suppose to be there isnt there !! hopping around to find it... thanks mum who kept it ...
'sometimes i just wonder, why my mum do so much for me when i didnt even do alot for her .... '
wanted to join in the jogging session, but well unable to do so still, by the time i reach it was like 850am .... toooo late .. this suppose to be my last beach trg for the next few months, AND IT RAINS LIKE CAT AND DOG !!! alright the worst is yet to come, just as the rain subsided we start surfing and I am sooooo lucky enough to get my first ever stung by jellyfish , 2xcombo somemore .. (strips on the left arm + swelling at the right middle finger) !! the starting feelings is like 10x seabug bites on the area, the stingy stingy kind. then itch itch ... then another NUS guy got stung too, well only 2 of us out of like sooo many ppl. anyway it got so much better now, thanks to the lifeguard on duty for the spray.
chervon ... unable to get the brown vests for mr bear! total sianness...
--- ' ---
total sianness, been thinking too much things that might happen, if certain things took place. well certainly just hope for the better.
fate or destiny, somethings are just meant to happen, with that certain people at the particular area....
Soo starting ... from the morning rite from 6am where i drag myself soooo hard out of my bed, and finally after 20mins of determination ... i got out of it. realising that things i thot suppose to be there isnt there !! hopping around to find it... thanks mum who kept it ...
'sometimes i just wonder, why my mum do so much for me when i didnt even do alot for her .... '
wanted to join in the jogging session, but well unable to do so still, by the time i reach it was like 850am .... toooo late .. this suppose to be my last beach trg for the next few months, AND IT RAINS LIKE CAT AND DOG !!! alright the worst is yet to come, just as the rain subsided we start surfing and I am sooooo lucky enough to get my first ever stung by jellyfish , 2xcombo somemore .. (strips on the left arm + swelling at the right middle finger) !! the starting feelings is like 10x seabug bites on the area, the stingy stingy kind. then itch itch ... then another NUS guy got stung too, well only 2 of us out of like sooo many ppl. anyway it got so much better now, thanks to the lifeguard on duty for the spray.
chervon ... unable to get the brown vests for mr bear! total sianness...
--- ' ---
total sianness, been thinking too much things that might happen, if certain things took place. well certainly just hope for the better.
fate or destiny, somethings are just meant to happen, with that certain people at the particular area....
Friday, April 09, 2010
6th sense
09apr. fri. sunny orange =)
decided to take train instead of biking to NDC, purely on feeling. 6th sense i suppose hahah. anyway who wld guess that just 2 hrs after the bright sunny weather, it's heavy rain with CAT 1 ?? well tthat's what exactly happen just when i step right out of the dental centre . i was like *phew* didn ride
thanks ms dentist for her forgiveness in me being overslept for a appt and giving me another appt date so near.
dentist: hi, experience any pain ??
m: no .
dentist: ytd morning unable to make it for the dental appt last min uh ? (jovial tone*)
m: (OMG ! soo ps la !) sooo sorry about it ... i ... =x
dentist: (laugh*)
---
reasons for choosing public transport over bike.
1) shelter!!
2) less probability of getting into accident.
3) can plug in ear piece and listen to music
4) can emo ! and think about stuffs (if ride and think = bang !)
5) can see people, yup how people does things (those interesting stuffs that happen around), see chio bus also =x
well,having a personal transport still weight more benefits then public transport i suppose.
reasons on how ppl decide on their career.
- take on whatever it's come
- the material ($$) return / propect
- for the bigger picture (PURPOSE) in life (eg. helping more people around , benefitting the society, becoming the world richest man, saving the environment, catching all bandits in the world...)
- for personal interest (just like to do this and that)
- etc
welll for me ? i suppose i have decided on the 3rd one . so things i choose will be highly based on my purpose in life . once i told someone about my dream, and he laughed at it saying 'model answer eh ? haha things like that wldn be happening in the reall life society...' well i shall prove to u that it's achievable .
--- " ---
I wonder how many strangers do we have eyes contact with ...
well i have 2 today ! hahah 1 from a ms who glaze at me (i tot something wrong with my appearance, alien !! ) and another from a baby (well i made a cheeky face in return =x!!) hahahha what about u ?
bus ride = ear plugs on + emoing time = good time for reflections
- camps ( how am i able to make better decisions at times ? which will both benefit people around me and also the 'mission' itself ? ) i suppose at times i wldn able to call for the most logical and practical decision. =(
- r/s (mostly about the past. welll thinking back, those things which i have done to salvage it was so dumb and unecessary haha i sld have take things more lightly)
- friends/ teammates 1)( i realise how bonds actually make seperation unbearably painful or 'how i wish' feeling. yup certainly i know, becos of those bonds i form with them, i gonna miss them real much when time comes to part.) that's the reason why i don like to form strong bonds with people in the past.... cos at the end of the day, parting is just another part and parcel in life. but still we will leave behind those colourful memories.. 2)thanks them for accepting my weakness (well we are all of different caliber(though i have upgraded from sampan to bumper boat, u guys are still torpedoes hahah). i know it well myself, v still they didn laugh at it or whatsoever, they accepted me as a friend, a teammate though we are of different caliber and i alway tend to pull u guys down in still water events.=( thanks guys.
--- ' ---
i have a good friend unhappy.
'no matter how dark the clouds is, it will still be gone one day.'
hope things will work out better and favourable on his/her side =) n e 2kg jia you !
decided to take train instead of biking to NDC, purely on feeling. 6th sense i suppose hahah. anyway who wld guess that just 2 hrs after the bright sunny weather, it's heavy rain with CAT 1 ?? well tthat's what exactly happen just when i step right out of the dental centre . i was like *phew* didn ride
thanks ms dentist for her forgiveness in me being overslept for a appt and giving me another appt date so near.
dentist: hi, experience any pain ??
m: no .
dentist: ytd morning unable to make it for the dental appt last min uh ? (jovial tone*)
m: (OMG ! soo ps la !) sooo sorry about it ... i ... =x
dentist: (laugh*)
---
reasons for choosing public transport over bike.
1) shelter!!
2) less probability of getting into accident.
3) can plug in ear piece and listen to music
4) can emo ! and think about stuffs (if ride and think = bang !)
5) can see people, yup how people does things (those interesting stuffs that happen around), see chio bus also =x
well,having a personal transport still weight more benefits then public transport i suppose.
reasons on how ppl decide on their career.
- take on whatever it's come
- the material ($$) return / propect
- for the bigger picture (PURPOSE) in life (eg. helping more people around , benefitting the society, becoming the world richest man, saving the environment, catching all bandits in the world...)
- for personal interest (just like to do this and that)
- etc
welll for me ? i suppose i have decided on the 3rd one . so things i choose will be highly based on my purpose in life . once i told someone about my dream, and he laughed at it saying 'model answer eh ? haha things like that wldn be happening in the reall life society...' well i shall prove to u that it's achievable .
--- " ---
I wonder how many strangers do we have eyes contact with ...
well i have 2 today ! hahah 1 from a ms who glaze at me (i tot something wrong with my appearance, alien !! ) and another from a baby (well i made a cheeky face in return =x!!) hahahha what about u ?
bus ride = ear plugs on + emoing time = good time for reflections
- camps ( how am i able to make better decisions at times ? which will both benefit people around me and also the 'mission' itself ? ) i suppose at times i wldn able to call for the most logical and practical decision. =(
- r/s (mostly about the past. welll thinking back, those things which i have done to salvage it was so dumb and unecessary haha i sld have take things more lightly)
- friends/ teammates 1)( i realise how bonds actually make seperation unbearably painful or 'how i wish' feeling. yup certainly i know, becos of those bonds i form with them, i gonna miss them real much when time comes to part.) that's the reason why i don like to form strong bonds with people in the past.... cos at the end of the day, parting is just another part and parcel in life. but still we will leave behind those colourful memories.. 2)thanks them for accepting my weakness (well we are all of different caliber(though i have upgraded from sampan to bumper boat, u guys are still torpedoes hahah). i know it well myself, v still they didn laugh at it or whatsoever, they accepted me as a friend, a teammate though we are of different caliber and i alway tend to pull u guys down in still water events.=( thanks guys.
--- ' ---
i have a good friend unhappy.
'no matter how dark the clouds is, it will still be gone one day.'
hope things will work out better and favourable on his/her side =) n e 2kg jia you !
Thursday, April 08, 2010
08apr. thu. breezy blue
LEAVE. LEAVE. LEAVE.
- 05, 06, RPLS chalet, get to know more about the juniors, some unhappiness happening around, still we are entertaining ourself when everything's over =) v soon in the near future, wldn be able to see them that much often or rather once in a bluemoon ?? with g trg coming up on all sats, i suppose i wldn be gg down for sat beach trg after this sat, till maybe like i ORD ? haha. the miss the sand, board, sun, sea, my teammates my friends.
- ytd was the 2nd time, higher content, higher effect but less destructive aftermath. great day with shuan, SL and sue. nv want to unleash the other side of me again. Anyway, once i see u as my good friend, you will be one alway =)
- forgot about dental appt in the morning ! damn shitty feeling, thanks them for being so forgiving and change it to tmr.
- ring ring ring, beep beep beep, sooo many text and phone calls from work =( haiz, what's this ?? i am on leave ... and still unable to get away from my task and responsiblity temporary. and well more things to face, more situation to handle next week.Why am i the person keep getting blame for other's troubles, decisions, confusion. tired la !! i need a break from all these.
the top just don understand how complicate things work at the bottom, and the bottom just dont know how to appreciated what they have currently but just keep asking for more.
I tried telling myself, just take it as a experiences in handling people from both the higher up and lower end, but still this ideas just died off easily. Ok at least now every bits and pieces of confusion have been cleared with everything settled down.
'just take it as a learning experience for the future.'
getting more distanced from campmates, changing roles, different duties and responsibilities.
--- " ---
tried looking on the bright side. but things wasnt really gg well on my side ...
all i hope now is to receive a acceptance letter and have my future decide.
I want to go back to the past where by i am able to do things alone without the help of others. all by myself. but that wldn happen i suppose.
can someone tell me my mistakes ? my weakness ? remind me of things I should keep it up ?? haiz
am wasting my time, not spending it effectively but rotting it away.
LEAVE. LEAVE. LEAVE.
- 05, 06, RPLS chalet, get to know more about the juniors, some unhappiness happening around, still we are entertaining ourself when everything's over =) v soon in the near future, wldn be able to see them that much often or rather once in a bluemoon ?? with g trg coming up on all sats, i suppose i wldn be gg down for sat beach trg after this sat, till maybe like i ORD ? haha. the miss the sand, board, sun, sea, my teammates my friends.
- ytd was the 2nd time, higher content, higher effect but less destructive aftermath. great day with shuan, SL and sue. nv want to unleash the other side of me again. Anyway, once i see u as my good friend, you will be one alway =)
- forgot about dental appt in the morning ! damn shitty feeling, thanks them for being so forgiving and change it to tmr.
- ring ring ring, beep beep beep, sooo many text and phone calls from work =( haiz, what's this ?? i am on leave ... and still unable to get away from my task and responsiblity temporary. and well more things to face, more situation to handle next week.Why am i the person keep getting blame for other's troubles, decisions, confusion. tired la !! i need a break from all these.
the top just don understand how complicate things work at the bottom, and the bottom just dont know how to appreciated what they have currently but just keep asking for more.
I tried telling myself, just take it as a experiences in handling people from both the higher up and lower end, but still this ideas just died off easily. Ok at least now every bits and pieces of confusion have been cleared with everything settled down.
'just take it as a learning experience for the future.'
getting more distanced from campmates, changing roles, different duties and responsibilities.
--- " ---
tried looking on the bright side. but things wasnt really gg well on my side ...
all i hope now is to receive a acceptance letter and have my future decide.
I want to go back to the past where by i am able to do things alone without the help of others. all by myself. but that wldn happen i suppose.
can someone tell me my mistakes ? my weakness ? remind me of things I should keep it up ?? haiz
am wasting my time, not spending it effectively but rotting it away.
Friday, April 02, 2010
01apr10. thu. breezy
Finally lonng rest after so long. 1 major event down, left with 2 more parade to go ! never regret choosing this path. No matter how tough life, going to be, i am sure i will make it, cause this is what I hope to achieve.
Anyway make a major mistake/accident during the event itself, while recovering from salutation, scope stuck to right pocket, unable to remedy it, follow by inspection. lucky enough they didnt stop infront of me, if not whole eyes from the spectator stand will be on me. phew ...
alright learn from mistake, next time have to get use to excecuting this drill more 'out' and precise then this will have very low chance of happening.
wants to go k-box !! sian ...
back to rotting ...
---
dim. gain weight
regular gyming/ exerising = gain weights
no workout = lose weight.
no eat / eat too much = not much significant changes in weight.
therefore . workout regularly !
--- " ---
31mar10. wed. Cloudy
It's the 'D-day' tomorrow. Somehow or rather i have lose confident in performing up to expectations. Afraid something will cork up, afraid that i didnt do things perfectly, afraid that no ones correct/ advise me on my mistakes. A weird person, isn't it ? haiz the feeling that some mistake will be make tmr, like what happen in the past.
It's rather hard to mange a large group of people (>40). Seriously lack of rest for the past 3 days, sleeping late(1+), waking up early (5+). Sort of worn out by the routine and those responsibilities given.
dim. body equation.
no sun + stationary standing = cold stingy feelings.
no sun + stomachache + stationary standing = numb, pale feeling
tolerance level to equation = 20mins to 1hrs
--- tested and proven ---
'Exceed, Endure, Excel' -- 3E that suddenly struck my mind.
------"-------
30mar10. tues. cloudy
Alright finally sometimes for myself to spend time alone after 2 days of hectic duties and responsibilities. Saw the ugly and greedy side of them, for the sake of the shirt and laziness sigh*. Probably it's due to my way in handling them ? Too friendly and nice i suppose.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY to WEN JUN! =D
Heard from some guys regarding some questions asked by certain person. How i hope there will be a situation or opportunity for me to tell this person straight in his face that ' CANT YOU JUST MIND YOUR OWN BUSNINESS AND STOP INTERFERING THINGS GIVING EVERYONE A MORE TROUBLED LIFE?? AND STOP BEING SO PARANOID ABOUT US BEING PULL OUT!"
You have no right to judge our training siong anot. cos you wasnt there.
You have no right to say that we were given too much previlleges, cos you wasnt the one who decide what we deserve. (moreover we havent receive any of our previlleges till now and our previlleges are given by those people who saw our hard work and sweats. )
SO STOP COMPARING ! THIS ISNT UR 1 MAN UNIT/ ORGANISATION! You are the one who deprived your people from privilleges, then dont use the way you handle your guys as compare to the way others do.
angry, where i shouldnt.
------- "
Sunday, March 28, 2010
swt nostalgic feelings
26-28mar. fri sat sun. Breezy
sweet nostalgic feelings. some actions that happened coincidentally makes me thought about things of the past. I suppose it's just another unecessary thoughts and feelings.
settle camp stuffs till 26th 1400hrs . phuture.zouk w rendall, JG, beatrice, zhen wei, wei sheng, peiying, may.... .... . am : sentosa beach trg, intense land trg =x . pm: diary of a wimpy kid movie finally a 13 hrs slp from 8pm-9am shiok shiok after like not having a proper rest in 28hrs ?!! hahahah sooo is this call maximizing the time outside ?? LOL doubt so uh ! anyway gym session w marv and hh , extreme core trg, not that extreme la but it's alll about abs and back. =)
the period after tired + emo = retarded actions and words =x well LS guys shld know hahaha
Looks can cover with make-up, physical appearance can be elimate with determination (exerise... ), but character don't change easily.
-------
siam !
25mar2010. thu. Breezy
lots of things happened the day before, but lucky that it didnt result to impactful consequences.Undergoing situation together makes one understand others more. Good thing ? I suppose it's both pros and cons. Sometimes situation makes us change perception on others. Better or uglier ? U decide .
Next week, the most compacted and busy week. where parade practise and gatherings comes in.
---_---_
PSB has certainly became one of my choice after looking into course avaliable in SIT and SUTD in AY2010-2011. At least something practical to fall back on when the applications are rejected by NTU and NUS. 4 months, 136 days to another major turn poing in my life. This time, I shall leave it to fate, what's going to happen 30years down the road shall be decided by this junction.
People often have troubles when choosing what they really want to study, a course of interest? or a course that will earn alot ? If you can imagine what u really wants to achieve in life then things wouldnt be that much of a trouble. But certainly, I have choose interest over money. helping more people over monetory benefits. I wouldnt be rich i suppose, but surely i will help alot of people when needed and create impacts on others life. Hopefully future experiences will only make me more firm on this decision instead my swaying towards regrets and monentory gains.
--- ' ---
adios
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
21mar2010. sun. storm
Unhappiness occurs when things not going the way you prefer, when unagreeable situations comes upon. First time booking in on sunday. Changes after changes, and more changes are coming up. It's this person again, who have a total different mindset from me or rather the norms. What he does irritates me, as well as going againest my principle of doing things. Hope he does change for the better, when out in a working society out there, he might have hard time struggling given his current attitude and way of doing things.
busy day ...
unhappy topics aside. - -
True love , what exactly is it ? When both parties fall in love naturally by chemistry? When both parties are attracted to each other and the feelings towards each other doesnt fade as time passes? When both parties meet eyes to eyes in the first meeting? When materalistic factors isnt take into consideration in a relationship? I suppose everyone have their own defination to it.
when both parties come together via natural chemistry which comes from within - my defination
I suppose it does exist but only in the minority out in the society. I suppose such things are often ruin my cruel practicality in life. Anyway how many guys out there wouldnt be tempted when a hot and pretty babe getting close? Which girl wouldnt consider a guy with much better eligibility. Certainly there will be people out there wouldnt be tempted. I suppose faithful wouldnt be the 'in' word for the current society where guys find sexier girls, and girls find richer guys.
Imagine you were given a ticket for 1 free ride on any public transport (buses, taxi, plane) the answer is obvious that we will usually choose something that worth more....
--- " ---
adios.
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