Snap shots

It's well and truly in the depths of frosty Autumn now. The chill has finally descended upon Tokyo after a long Indian summer earlier. It's been a while since I last posted anything. It's been crazy. I've gone a long break from work and travelled around with Wanhua in late October and early Novemberwhen she came to visit me. It was so lovely to see someone close to my heart again.

I'm not sure who's still reading this, but I feel obliged to write stuff anyway. Haha, all in all, it was an amazing trip. Kansai was lovely to us, but it was so warm compared to Tokyo.

After the exhausting night bus ride from Shinjuku to Osaka, we explored Osaka mostly on foot and retired early that night. It was a pretty standard city. I guess I didn't have the opportunities to have a proper conversation with the infamously friendly and humorous locals.

Kobe was interesting though. It was a nice port city with European influences and the highlight was basically eating the best kobe beef in my life. Kyoto, however, was in a league above all.

The countryside was breathtakingly beautiful, it was freezing of course. Otherwise it was just magical. The shrines and temples transported me to traditional Japan and it felt great to be away from the urban hustle and bustle.

After returning to Tokyo, we went out to Roppongi for Halloween and it was crazy. We didn't manage to get into any club, but it was still a memorable night. It was cheap at least!

After which we visited some regular spots around town such as Akiharaba, Harajuku and also went to Disneyland. But I reckoned the best day was when we went to Okutama to check out some fresh autumn foliage. That was a tough 4 hour hike through the woods but the scenery was well worth our effort. Plus the following day, it was basically face-stuffing bootcamp! We went to tsukiji market early in the morning, but it was closed!!! Fortunately for us, many restaurants were still open and we splurged on some expensive fresh sushi breakfast. It was great and thereafter we headed back home for our autumn BBQ. It was fantastic to start drinking at 12 and then be in bed at around midnight. Everyone was pretty pissed by then, but it was a great day.

On Friday, I brought W to Kichijoji because it's my favourite place in Tokyo. We walked around the shops and eventually popped ourselves for a couple of hours in a lovely cosy cafe. We'd prefer watching some good looking Jap boys walk past through the windows, but we had to content ourselves with screaming kids from the playground next door. The tea and the donuts were to-die-for though.

At night, we headed to WOMB, which is meant to be one of the top 10 clubs in the world. (No photos allowed either...) The venue was really small in a residential district in Shibuya and the doorman was hushing us to keep our voices down at 1am. The headliner DJ wasn't that good and by the time the awesome Japanese DJ came on at 4am, we were too pooped to carry on.

Finally we just slobbed around on Saturday and we managed to get to the Happara festival in Musashino park with Camilla & Shin. It was wet and cold, but still nice to be hippie-chic.

Since then I've been to a couple of other places, but let's save that for other future posts. x

Summer

Today is the 6-month anniversary for the March 11 Earthquake AND the 10 year anniversary for the Sept 11 attack. The latter changed the world... I would probably say the same for the former too, in light of the all the recent attitudes towards nuclear power. I still remember how small I felt as we tuned in to the radio in our classroom in secondary school, listening to the full impact of the whole situation. The night before I saw the unbelievable image of the smoking twin towers live on the 10 o'clock news. I couldn't comprehend what had happened, but the image burned itself into my mind. I must have thought of how crazy the world is becoming at that point in time.

10 years on, I still tear while reading magazine articles of how people's lives are turned upside down by the tragic events which happened on that fateful day. Little did we know that the 11th would be witness to another devastating disaster in Japan. It's been 6 months and I don't know how to feel to be honest. While it feels unreal because we haven't heard so much about the things going on Tohoku, yet at the same time, it still feels as if I just survived the quake yesterday. Our anxiety about the future still persist, but in a subdued manner as we carry on with our lives.

Talking about my life - I'm terribly sorry for being away for a month. August was crazy due to work. I worked 10am-11opm shifts almost everyday. It was a bit hellish, but I managed to live through it. I had some fun times but it just all added up to a terribly exhausting month.

I went to Disneysea with Camilla and it was really fun to see this fantasy world. Actually, it was more fascinating to see how crazy the Japanese people are about mickey mouse and his friends. It was unbelievable how they can embrace the whole gaudiness of the mickey empire and the money-spinning empire. They love it, they were buying down the entire place!?!?!!?! It would never happen in Singapore. Boys were happy to wear mickey mouse ears headbands. Everyone wore Mickey Mouse shirts and had a 1000/2000yen popcorn container hanging from their necks. Before this, I was at the National Museum with Masa-chan and it was really interesting to see the different Japanese cultural treasures. It did no favors for my superrrrrrrrrrrr sore feet though.

Earlier I went to the controversial Yasukuni shrine with Jeremy. He's my junior from my college and he happened to come to Japan for a summer music festival. I met him for the first time in Tokyo and we had a lovely time hanging out. It was cool to visit the shrine. I was really lucky to have some history background and I was able to look at its unique depiction of history. I found out from Yusuke that the shrine was able to write whatever it likes because of "freedom of speech". Shrines are entitled to their own opinions, which meant that they could write their own version of history. I found many contentious points, to which I chuckled to myself. However, most of the visitors are old Japanese people who seemed to take the information seriously. It further reinforces their belief that WW2 had a positive impact on the world. Still, I can understand from the Japanese point of view after looking at the exhibits in the museum. While the political leaders' visits to the shrines to honor the war dead are undoubtedly controversial, I can understand why some of them insist on such a tradition. The shrine has been established for a long time to honor ALL those who sacrificed their lives for the country (or ruler), thus it would be too narrow-minded to stop them from offering their respects at Yasukuni shrine because of WW2. Of course, any clever Japanese politican would not tempt fate and invite trouble by insisting on making official trips there. Kudos to the newest Prime Minister Noda for being pragmatic and prudent with regards to the Yasukuni shrine.

That's all I remember. I'm a little tipsy too, after polishing a bottle of wine with my housemate this evening. I had spent the evening watching and listening to my housemate cry about her heartbreak. My heart goes out to her. Be strong my dear. x

count your blessings to find what you're looking for

My neon & concrete jungle wonderland

It's been more than 6 months now! I feel quite at home in my adopted country, but I must admit that I'm still quite in adept at the Japanese language. Some things are still very challenging for me, such as banking or running some official errands which require more than the daily conversation competency.

Anyway, I suddenly felt like writing again. I was moved to tears after I read about the tragic incidents involving both the innocent kids who died in Olso, Norway as well as the sudden death of Amy Winehouse. It seems like tragedies seem to be getting increasingly common. I suppose I'm feeling extra sensitive because I was fortunate enough to survive the March 11 earthquake to witness the horror of entire impact of the earthquake, the following tsunami, the on-going nuclear crisis and the incompetency of TEPCO and the Japanese government to fully handle this emergency effectively. On top of the immediate destruction, deaths, evacuations, rescue operations, it's been 4 months now and we're still getting hit by an onslaught of food scandals. The safety standards have already been elevated in light of the current situation, but we still get news reports of contaminated tea and beef; contaminated breast milk; irradiated children in Fukushima and so on. Nevertheless, the government continues to insist that it's okay to eat small amounts of contaminated food. Yet they have ignored the glaring signs that the radiation has already seeped into all parts of the food chain in Japan. The Japanese people are largely unconcerned with such reports, but I think that they're either resigned to these facts or they prefer to feign ignorance in order to live a normal life. I'm sure that the ordinary Japanese think that the radiation is the least of their worries now, given the state of the economy (which got worse after March 11) and the lack of air-conditioning in the sweltering summer heat.

Samia sent me a concerned email to ask about me and how the situation is like in Tokyo. To be honest, everything is so normal. Until I read the forum on JapanToday a couple of days ago and it seems like the expats and other foreigners are extremely concerned about the irradiated environment they are living in right now. I'm thinking more about the risk I'm putting myself at, simply by living here. What these people are saying might be true, but I suppose I'm going to feign ignorance as well in order to have a decent quality of life here. I don't see the need to move away since I'm not pregnant nor am I a vulnerable child. I'm more upset at the failings of the government who seems more interested to cover their ass than to protect the health of their citizens.

One of my students have gone up north to volunteer in Tohoku and he said that he was very inspired by the experience. He met the survivors who are gritting their teeth through this whole trauma, with the determination to make a living once again in their hometown. That's really admirable and comparing himself with them, he feels extremely fortunate. I can't argue with that there. I'm content with life here. Everyday is exciting for me. Days with work are less so, but overall it's been great. People are generally very kind and thoughtful. I can't wait to explore different areas on Japan and go through all four seasons again, including the skin-chilling wintry conditions. A new country is just so much fun. To be part of the unique culture and to witness the people's pride of their own culture is genuinely rewarding. Given the choice, I'd still want to relive the whole experience again.

So back to the tragedies we've been reading too often in the newspapers. I really hope that things will become better in the world today. For everyone. Make love not war. Peace. x

Japanese Birthday BBQ

Happy birthday to me! I've just turned 24 on 24 June, with most of the people I care about in Japan. For that, I feel really really blissful.

I had the blessing of finishing my workday on 23 June with a cheeky 駅ビル, I even got a surprise flower bouquet from my student who is a florist. Then last night we had a boisterous BBQ party on the porch with my housemates and some friends who were able to pop by for the party.

My dear friends (Cho & Cai-chan from China and Taiwan respectively) prepared a lot of tasty food for the party even without me asking. Shin is always ever so helpful in getting the whole BBQ set up organised for us. Jun-san also came by and gave me a super nice box of macarons from patisserie Sadaharu AOKI paris. Looks well posh. Cho-chan also gave me a really lovely box of perfume on top of making really yummy food for me all the time! After she came down, they decided to spring a surprise on me. So there and then, Shin presented me with the "Hana-uta" CD from Hanaregumi! Thank you Shin and Camilla, who are among my best friends here. Sue and Robert also chipped in a yummy blueberry pie as my 'birthday cake' complete with candles and a song! Even Masaki came after completing his school work with a 6 pack of Asahi to get the party even more lubricated. Taro-kun also brought his sweet girlfriend to join us. Williams, the eccentric cleaner/pesudo gramps at our house also gave me a green tea mochi AND a thousand yen as my birthday present. Strange, but I appreciate his thought. haha. It was a really nice night.

Thank you so much. I'm truly moved.

21 April 2011

I'm just so amused sitting on the train journey from Tachikawa to Shinjuku during the evening rush hour... 

I'm seated in between two middle-aged perpetually-grunting salarymen with stinky bad breaths. On top of that i see tired tokyoites sleeping in all sort of positions, unlike the glamorous image they usually try to preserve. The same guy who was fixing his painstakingly waxed hairstyle would absentmindedly sleep leaning back against the window pane, leaving his mouth agape. 

I've also noticed that pointed shoes are the footwear of choice of many salarymen. Moreover, it seems that many high school girls make it a point to make their skirts as short as possible without showing their goose-bumped butt cheeks. Now, let's not discuss the hentai paradise of escalators.

As we pass through each station, I love watching the image of people packed into each carriages, framed perfectly by the opened doors, just like every artfully captured photo. It's nice to be back in Tokyo. 

Hope springs eternal

I feel especially blessed today. My heart is filled with simple warmth, not unlike the balmy weather we have been bestowed upon these few days. Perhaps its the potent combination of meeting some lovely new people, being given the various opportunities to admire the devastatingly beautiful sakura during this season, observing the Japanese society get themselves together after the Tohoku earthquake to enjoy their annual ohanami parties, meeting my students again and hearing their relief and gratitude towards my return to Tokyo. I'm just so glad to be back. It's times like this when I feel like I've finally done something right with my life. Not that everything had been a disaster until now, but I suppose I'm thankful to be able to sit back, reflect upon the last few months and appreciate everything that have happened in my life. There were the post-quake panic, there were the big aftershocks reminding me that I'm back in earthquake capital of the world. But still!

This is my first spring experience. I guess it's a bit out of the ordinary because of the post-earthquake situation and we're still not out of some nuclear danger. Nevertheless, time and tide waits for no man and springtime has sprung upon us like clockwork. It's utterly breathtaking. One can only truly appreciate the beauty of spring only after experiencing a harsh winter. Only when one is resigned to the eternal chill and barrenness of the land, Spring blooms from under our nose without us noticing. Then all of a sudden, when you realise that it's a little too warm to wear your winter coat, you also begin to notice all the different colours around you. I've never imagined rose bushes to look as vivacious as they are. I've never imagined cherry blossoms to look so delicately elegant. I've never imagined wild flowers to look so pretty and dignified.

Spring in Japan is definitely a good time. It's a pity that my family has decided to give it a miss due to the extraordinary circumstances. Especially with the hanami season, all of the country have poured out of their homes to view the cherry blossoms. It really feels like the whole country is having a giant music festival of some sorts. People picnicking and drinking merrily in the park, you hear laughter all around; people playing music on their guitars or just playing them from their stereos; people painting the scenery; people getting enthusiastic about something as silly as rowing the boat on the lake. The happiness is well infectious. In a country like this, you can only believe that they will make it good. I still believe in Japan and you should too! :)

Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city

After I touched down in Changi Airport, I was glad to be home to see all my friends and family again, but I didn't feel particularly good about being away from Japan at the height of the crisis. I was worried about my friends who were still in Japan. Thank god for facebook because they allowed us to keep in touch conveniently. I wasn't able to sleep peacefully at night for the first week I was home. Perhaps home was too comfortable compared to my week of sleepless nights since the earthquake. I think there will still be more aftershocks and I hope that I will be able to live through the slight tremors just like before the major quake. I will die from sleep deprivation and fright if that continued to happen. Home has been nice, but I've been rather bored. I don't have strong cravings from certain type of local dishes and I don't have strong desires to visit certain places. Some places did bring back some vivid memories though, but as time passes, I'm sure it'd continue to fade from technicolour to a muted sepia.

Nevertheless, I had the privilege of popping into Bangkok for a short trip to visit J. It had been a brilliant plan because I would be bored during the weekdays anyway. At the airport on Tuesday afternoon, I was just thinking of how often I've visited airports since 2008. Every return trip would involve 4 airports and suddenly I realised how dependent I had been on airports and airplanes to see people and places which matter to me.

Anyhow, BKK was a refreshing change from the familiarity of Singapore town. It was an even better surprise to find BKK in the middle of an unexpected cold front when I arrived. It felt good to feel a bit chilly, although I'm not such a big fan of icy cold showers in the mornings. It was really good to see J again, even as friends. Everything felt like how it had always been, minus the physical affection and intimacy. I must admit that occasionally I wished for the warm and safe embrace offered by his arms but I'm truly glad that we are still good friends. I won't want to jeopardise that in any way. It had been fun. BKK is so amazing because hardly anything has changed since I last visited in 2008. The same shops are still in Siam Square, traffic jams are still there, Swensens still look like the one we had in Singapore 10 years ago, thai massages still hurt me like hell, I still cry eating spicy Thai food and everyone still thinks that I'm Thai... Okay, I'm going to give it some credit - the airport link is finally open!

So that was my trip and so much thanks to J for going out of his way many times to be such a lovely host in one of my favourite exotic but frentic city. His nan passed last thursday evening and he had been able to be pretty stoic about it, my deepest regrets and love to him and his family. I met her once and she was an absolute sweetheart. Well... I'm due back in the sprawling city of Tokyo in a couple of days and I'm a bit scared now after being on a break for so long. Hopefully I'll ease back in smoothly and that my work schedule fills up to make up for lost time. I also some issues with the BUC workshop which I pray and hope will work out with as little fuss as possible. My brother just told me that my dad got a mortgage on the house and that's making me well worried. Why the hell is he doing that? I'm in no position to tell what my dad does with his money, but sometimes I'm really scared at what he does. I just hope that he knows what he's doing. That said, it makes me want to be completely 100% financially independent. With all the earthquake disruptions, it has put a massive dent in my plans to earn and save money. Now I'm living under my parents' roof and I feel guilty for doing so. I should seriously start thinking of what my plans are, after this Japanese stint. J said his dad told him that if you can justify what you do, then you've found the key to happiness. I'd say - use this advice only if you believe it. It works both ways in my opinion.

So this morning, I was reading the papers and it said that about only 20% of the population wants to emigrate overseas and that was a good thing. I would think that 20% is a significant part of the population and it surely isn't the exception... It gets really annoying when the mass media in Singapore is so blatantly obvious that it's the mouthpiece of the government, I'm sure it's not that hard to look neutral with some careful wording??? At least try to fool us convincingly. So anyway before I digress, I think 20% is a good part of the community who wants to explore the world. I'm glad that at least 1 in 5 people are having the same outlook as me, because Singapore is like a warm bath which you'd never want to get out, but at the same time, it's not so much fun being a swollen and wrinkled prune in the bath for the rest of your life. A bath is particularly luxurious when you're out and about toiling, exploring, discovering, learning, breathing, fighting. I see Singapore as a safe haven to return to once in a while to get my fixes, but it's not particularly attractive as a place to do the former. That's my choice - I'll always be a Singaporean. I really like our unique identity and I love my home together with all my loved ones here, but doesn't mean that I must stay put.

And while I'm home, things seem to be rather exciting with all sorts of scandals coming to light. First, this elitist Samantha chick who dissed the heartlanders for going to Holland Village in their chui clothes. Second, this hilarious Tin Pei Ling who amuses me to no end with her jabber-gabber which was full of PAP keywords without answering the questions directly fielded by the reporters. Lastly, it's the photograph of the NS boy with a maid carrying his field pack. What is Singapore coming to???

ごめんえ。

I'm coming home, if things go well. I don't feel so good about it though. My housemates are worried and are still torn over what to do, in light of the growing nuclear crisis. They were worried about me because I'm by myself, but at least I can make decisions by myself. My couply friends have to debate and discuss what to do as each person has their own needs, fears, concerns and commitments. I can hear my neighbour sobbing now as they talk about they should do. :(

Please please please please not let this become a horrible horrible disaster. Japan has suffered enough. I am worried and I feel terrible for being able to go home when not everyone else has the opportunity to do so. I'm sorry. Really sorry. I had thought that I was truly going to stick it out with everyone else here, the least I could do was to conserve some energy and provide comfort to my friends who are equally worried. And now I'm leaving them. I think they are very understanding and I'm sure that my departure has affected their morale to grit this out.

Please forgive me. In light of the seriousness of the current situation, I had chosen to ease my parents' and families' fears for me, instead of being selfish and staying here. I have to admit that my growing fears about the situation has also contributed to my decision to leave. When I switched on the telly this morning to watch CNN, i was utterly horrified to find more ominous news about the nuclear situation. I have lost any faith I had left in TEPCO. Radiation has hit Tokyo now and my mom freaked out just because I've left the house to meet my friend in the neighbouring town for lunch.

It's been difficult trying to keep calm in this sort of situation and I've been contemplating which is the best option. I'm mentally stressed by trying to think of something while being spooked by the constant aftershocks. My fears of the radiation is also getting to me and nothing seems to help. News have been especially depressing. I fear for the victims. They are even closer to Fukushima than Tokyo. I fear for my friends who can't leave because it is their home. I worry about my friends who chose to stay here because they think it's the best. I'm terrified that Japan will be thrown into more chaos with a potential nuclear meltdown which might happen over the next few days. I have grown to love this country and its people, even though I've only been here for a short while. Please please please please please show us some light at the end of the tunnel. Hopefully, the tunnel isn't too long.

Sincerely,

me x

困ったな

G left Tokyo for home. I didn't expect him to do that. Perhaps I secretly wanted to do the same, but I can't believe that he really really left. Especially when he's seeing another Japanese girl here. All respect lost.

期待

The planned power outages are being postponed now. So we are all waiting to see what's going to happen. On top of those victims who are struggling to stay alive in this disaster, everyone's trying to figure out how to deal with this crisis. Corporations scrambling to ensure some kind of normalcy in their business operations, mothers trying to keep their children calm and well-fed with a steady supply of food, people going to work although the transport system is more or less half-shut down. I'm off work today and it's making me feel rather jumpy because I can't do stuff without thinking of the larger picture.

I was feeling downright terrified a while ago after watching more CNN news on the Telly in the lounge with some of my housemates. Suddenly I felt so alone and helpless here. My family is asking me to return home and I'm somewhat tempted because the nuclear situation is nowhere near resolution and the incoming news only appear to be more serious. I don't want people to get worried about me, because worrying resolves nothing. On the other hand, I really don't want to leave because I can't just ditch my work, ditch my friends and these people here who have helped me settle into Tokyo. I suppose if I could I got just go AWOL but I doubt I'll ever have the face or the permission (my work visa will definitely be withdrawn) to come back to Japan anymore, given that I fled at the first sight of misfortune...

Although Tokyo is far off from Miyagi prefecture and there has hardly been any serious damage here, everyone's preparing for the M7 quake aftershock which has a likelihood of 70% occurrence over the next couple of days. Fingers crossed that our buildings are still able to withstand further impact. I think the greater worry is regarding the nuclear power plants emergencies. Everyone's afraid of the dreaded Nuclear meltdown and causing widespread radiation exposure to the people of Japan. We're currently 200km away from the Fukushima plant, but I suppose in the event that the meltdown occurs, all of us won't be able to escape the radioactive fumes from the incident.

There's a quiet and orderly sense of panic in Tokyo. Everyone's taking it into their stride as well as they can. Nobody is in hysteria, but the shelves of the supermarts and konbinis are getting stripped bare because incoming supplies are slow. I would think that most supplies are headed north to help with the resecue efforts. This is further compounded by the fact that some people are stocking up on essentials JUST IN CASE. I know of some people who are preparing to leave either Tokyo or Japan. This is another tricky situation because while I want to ride this out as far as possible. What if it comes down to a terrible situation where I really want to go home to seek shelter, it's probably too late. Yet I don't want to leave prematurely like a coward.

There are 2 men working on the newly built apartments next to our house. The sight of them working gives me courage. They must believe that everything will be back to normal soon. Fight-on everyone. Happy White Day! (If you're celebrating it!) x

The aftermath

Thank god I'm able to type this.

It's been more than 24 hours since the quake struck Japan yesterday evening and many of us didn't know what hit us until we switched on the Telly. It was an experience of a lifetime. Something which I really have no desire to go through again. Knowing the fact that I'm in Tokyo, Japan, which is still expecting the BIG quake to hit, doesn't seem to make me feel any better.

Yesterday's events just went past in a blur, but my fear still feels very vivid.

It was a gorgeous day. I went running in Koganei park that Friday morning and I was admiring the blossoming plum trees. I was happily thinking to myself that Spring is finally arriving, although the weather still seems pretty cold. I got back home and made myself some hearty brunch. I was sitting outside for a while, then it started to get very windy and chilly. I headed back inside.

I had a hot shower and I was getting dressed for work when I felt the house shaking. I was just thinking Oooh- Earthquake. I've felt it many times since I've arrived, and most of them just rumble on for a short while before passing. They don't evoke much anxiety. This one felt really different because the shaking felt stronger, it was unlike anything I've felt. I opened my door to look around the corridor because I remembered that's what Camilla told me to do in the event of an earthquake. The irony was that we were just discussing about earthquakes the day before and how it's been pretty tame so far. Then this one hit us.

So everything was rattling violently in my room and I decided to go out of the house in my bathrobe. I saw our neighbours out on the street as well. The shaking continued for about 5 minutes. We finally felt it subside and then we decided to go back to our rooms. Soon after, the rattling started again. So once more, we poured out of our house. We went into the lounge when it was safer to look at the news. It appears that a HUGE-ASS quake had hit the north eastern part of Japan and the tsunami washing over the Miyagi prefecture was just spine-chillingly devastating.

No doubt the quake we felt here was bad, but nothing like what's happening up north. I finally got dressed before I had to go out into the streets in indecent attire, and it wasn't long before I had to go out again! It was crazy. I came back to see my room half-trashed up with contents all over the floor. My shot glasses broke as they fell unto the ground. The wooden beams were shedding wooddust and cracks seemed to look larger than before. I hastily tidied up the room before trying to contact my workplace. I couldn't contact my office at all as all the mobile telecom connections were either blocked, jammed or down. I rushed to the train station to find that it was closed. I then rushed to the payphone to call some more, but nobody picked up the phone. I returned to the house and we just sat around in the lounge watching the news. It was as disturbing as it was fascinating. It was like watching scenes out of a hollywood disaster movie. It was then one of our housemates came back into the house and said he walked home all the way from Shinjuku as the trains stopped. Another came back saying he walked home from Kokubunji. I'm just so relieved to know that they are ok!

We were definitely upset by the scenes we saw on TV, but we decided to have an Earthquake party to calm our nerves. It was kind of inappropriate, but there was nothing else we could do. The news was extremely depressing. However, Japanese TV had a matter-of-fact coverage of the day's events, whereas CNN made it extremely sensational. I guess I'm not the best person to judge which is better - I just got that contrasting feelings as I flipped between the two channels.

Aftershocks kept on coming. Last night hardly anyone had a peaceful rest because there were a couple of strong tremors which woke people up. Tension is thick in the air, but I was glad to see more people make it back home in one piece this morning. I was advised to stock up on some food and water just in case the big one strikes to Tokyo. So let's keep our fingers crossed and hope for the best. Unfortunately, I currently have a bad headache probably from the lack of sleep and my constant worrying about the tremors. I can't differentiate the difference between a proper ground tremor or if I'm just feeling dizzy!!!

My heart goes out to those victims who had it 12345678998754324X worse than we Tokyoites did. I hope everyone will be able to find their loved ones amidst the chaos. We'll have to wait and see. I pray that we'll be able to wait it out with minimal damage. The potential nuclear disaster is still a ticking time bomb as well. We're all scared. Humanity is still at the mercy of nature. Hang in there everyone.

私のバレンタイン

I had the best valentine's day ever and it wasn't because of a date. I met a CS-er guy for the first time and it was sort of nice, but not in any romantic way. It was just interesting to learn more about someone's experiences in life, hopes and dreams. I had conveyer-belt sushi for dinner at his request and instead of spending the rest of the evening in an Izakaya, we ended up in a cafe because it was snowing pretty hard and he couldn't take the cold. Anyhow, he had some expensive beer while I chose to indulge myself in a value for money 800yen dessert and tea set. It was a gorgeous cheesecake and some hot ginger tea. It's been a long while since I had proper cheesecake. It was a real treat. おいいしです。

The day started out great when I was walking to the train station, on my way to work because tiny ice pellets were raining on me. It didn't last long and I assumed that I've probably seen all of the snow over the weekend. I did not foresee the generous snowfall that evening and it just made me so so so so so happy. I was freezing my ass off as I treaded carefully the entire way home. I couldn't help but smile like a maniac to myself, as I whipped out my けいたい to take as many pictures as I could. Especially so because, in Shimokitazawa, I could tell that this was proper wet snow, but I had not expected to see Koganei covered in 3 inches of snow by the time I got home! I was disappointed to see that my streets were quiet, but I was hoping that some people would share my enthusiasm in a bit. I took my Mac to the lounge and I was hollering to my friends online on FB about the snow. Not long after that, I got hit by a snowball from outside. I was saved by the glass window, but it was the beginning of a truly carefree, childlike memorable night frolicking in the snow.

My housemates and I went out in the snow for a mini snowball fight before making snow angels and taking silly photos in the snow. I thought that my fingers would drop off in the cold! We also made a giant snowman and we named it Jeff- after deciding from Bob, Fred and Jeff. I wonder why, but it was all in good fun. I don't know why it felt soooo good, but just being in the snow, laughing and having fun with your friends is such a wonderful feeling. It's the highlight of my stay here now. After our adventure outside, we trooped back into the warm lounge to enjoy some hot cocoa and chatted into the early hours of the morning.

I think that it's such a waste that so many Tokyoites I meet at work dislike the snow. They say - "Ohhh, I don't like the snow because it's sooo COLD!!! And snow causes train disruptions, very inconvenient!!!" Typical Tokyoites. I think that snow makes the your suffering in the cold worth it! That's the whole purpose of winter - to see snow! But they only moan and groan (さむい！） about the potential inconveniences brought about by snow. It's a shame. They should just build their houses properly with cement and concrete. This morning when I woke up the sounds of snow shovelling and the pitter-patter of melting snow on a fine, sunny day, I still felt the warm fuzzy feeling in my heart from the night before. I was wondering if Jeff was still standing tall and proud outside our house. Thank god he was, but he's leaning back a bit too much now.

I was planning to go to Koganei park with Sue today, but I had to run some errands like setting up an MUFJ bank account because my Shinsei bank card didn't seem to work properly. So I had to pay for my rent by hook or by crook somehow. I took the advice of Chihiro and Sue volunteered to walk me to MUFJ in Musashi-Sakai. I'm so grateful for her help because SETTING UP A BANK ACCOUNT IN JAPAN IS SO RIDICULOUSLY TROUBLESOME. ちょめんどさい！So yeah... I'm glad it was all sorted out in the end, but only through a lot of unnecessary trouble. My day got better from then as I spent the rest of the evening chatting with Chihiro after having a late lunch. She saved my taste buds because I tried her Udon and I liked it now, after hating it since I tried it for the first and last time in the Nanyang school canteen. ゆかたね！

I'm just having a verbal diarrhea now. I can't help it. I think i still have some left-over excitement from the night before. Snow reminds of the beautiful times I spent in Switzerland, but I'm sure it'll only remain as memories. もいいよ。I'm really happy now, G got a Valentine's day date! He received a heart-shaped chocolate cake and went on a typical (high-school kinda) date - lunch and a movie. Haha. SO SWEET and MUSHY!!! He was gushing about the heart-shaped cake. Haha. Young love. I'm glad that he gets to feel this way because I don't think I can ever make him feel this way. Haha. At the same time, A is back home in Spain now. I only think of him once in a while, but I like it because there are no expectations for me to meet him once a week and I feel pressured to make time for him although I was very busy. I would have rather just spent some quiet time at home. He's nice and funny, でもわたしのあこがれのひとわKame-chan. I'm speaking Japlish now. Oopsie. Well, I'll try to write more soon. I've been so busy working after I returned from Singapore. じゃまたね。おやすみなさい！

ただいま！

I'm home for a day and already I'm feeling the impact from the opening of the sluice gates of memories. Mostly bittersweet. It's kind of nice to indulge myself for a bit, knowing that it's not going to last, but it's also kind of alarming because I don't know if I've already truly moved on or not. (twiddle my thumbs furiously)

So the weather has been somewhat pleasant although it alternates between rain and sun throughout the entire day. I'm glad for the brief respite from the freezing cold in Tokyo, so no complaints as of yet. It'll definitely help if you have a pair of cute wellies to run around puddles in, wellies ftw! :)

Today, I spent most of the day hanging around at home, catching up with my mom while she's busy preparing for the Chinese New Year festivities. I dropped by SMU for a short wander to see if anyone I know would be on campus for a spontaneous catch up session over a nice cuppa teh tarik. It didn't work out though. It's nice to be back - Some things never change - like the familiar faces at the Delight food stall in SOA. But I felt an ache in my heart knowing that I'm too old and no longer belongs in this school anymore, because I have hardly any friends left. The students were horsing around on their break, and that really reminded me of school days. Not that our school days were extremely enjoyable, I suppose everything becomes rose-tinted in retrospect. Still it was nice to nurse a cup of teh peng on my favourite bench next to the National Museum, appreciating the gentle breeze on my face, while I observed my juniors potter about.

So far so good. Except that my aircon is a bit too loud and there's way too much meat on the dining table. Otherwise, I'm thankful to be able to use my mobile phone on public transport without feeling like I'm an social outcast AND not having to sort out my rubbish. woohoo. Well... Hopefully I'll be able to catch as many people as possible. Gotta catch them all - like pokemon. x

この時を生きて

What's new? I've been slaving at work mostly. It's really nice to start seeing more familiar faces who take my lessons on a regular basis. I really enjoy chatting with them while helping them learn English at the same time. I'm glad I'm not stuck with a monotonous desk job, being in the rat race back in Singapore. I think that teaching is a really meaningful job, although I have to admit that, for the most part, I am doing it for a living. I like my job but it doesn't mean that it doesn't have any demerits. I must say that I'm really very grateful for the opportunity to be here in Tokyo, starting life anew in a new country, immersed in a new culture and language, hanging out with new friends and freezing my ass off in winter.

Anyway, it helps that I had some really interesting lessons lately too - one lady who worked in the city liked me for my ability to talk with her about economics and finance, the complicated business stuff. She probably knew more technical things than I did, but I was the one who could phrase things in English. Haha. It was such a coincidence that her company is offering a post-grad programme to study the MBA in SMU, so that's her ultimate purpose for improving her English. I will be so elated if I can help her achieve that! Another client have business conferences regularly and he always had trouble trying to figure out what the Singaporean representative said, so he wanted me to speak in the Singaporean accent, so that he can get some practice! He told me that he was surprised that I didn't have the infamous accent, because he chose me based on that assumption. Haha, so I told him that I can prepare something to read in the Singaporean accent in the next lesson. Last but not least, I have to help a doctor who is going to take a medical exam in the U.S. this coming March. How I can help is to pretend to be a patient, while he asks me some questions in our role-play. I thought that was very unique and I think I'm learning a lot about some medical symptoms now.

On the other hand, work is definitely not god's gift to mankind. The pay is not the best for what we do, so I hope that it'll increase in the near future. Moreover, work is mentally and emotionally intensive. You need to keep your energy levels high to motivate your students to work hard with you during lessons. You need to maintain 100% attentiveness to your clients and thus I've been trying to yawn on the sly, with my eyes open while my client is looking away. Also, the hours I have to work is not that desirable. I go to work when people are heading home and I have to get up to go to work on weekends and on bank holidays. Not exactly a morale-booster. Haha. At least there are lots of nice (ENGLISH-SPEAKING) people at work to chat with when I'm taking my breaks.

Nevertheless, I'm enjoying myself so far. I've been here for almost 2 months now and it has been eventful! No doubt about that. I haven't done much traveling to be honest, I blame the freezing weather and my awful work schedule. Still, it's been a fabulous experience just living the Japanese way of life... mostly. Let's see... Well, I take bentos to work and I eat too much onigiris for my own good. I enjoy living in a wooden house with zero insulation, and listen to the mice scamper across the roof at night. Stuff like that. A good part of my happy times here are owed to my lovely housemates. I feel that we're becoming quite a family here. We hang out regularly to chat, celebrate special occasions together... mostly by drinking if you were wondering. Haha. In fact both of my neighbours, the couples living on my left and right have gotten married very recently. I'm so happy for the 2 couples as they are such nice people and I'm comforted to know that people can find happiness anywhere. Apparently, they have designated me as the potential babysitter now. (not!)

Hmm, so yes. 10 days to home and I'm really looking forward to seeing most of my friends again. Catching up, feeling the familiar warmth (or rain-soaked feet), drowning myself in frothy teh tarik and using all the Singlish in the world without feeling self-conscious. Home sweet home. x

明けましておめでとうございます

G & I headed to Akihabara today and the New Year sales were going at full steam. I didn't buy a lucky bag as there was nothing that appealed to me. However, I did buy many other items, when I wasn't planning to shop. Although I'm wrecked with guilt, I thought I scored many good bargains. For one, I finally got myself an electric heater which will probably save me a bit on electricity bills and save myself from numb feet and hands. I got a really sweet super-duper mini speaker, and a pair of in-ear earphones for my ipod as well. Plus a gorgeous & warm fur coat at 2990yen, which was originally 7990yen. YATTA!

Against my will, G has been trying to influence me to be a gaming geek like him. I spent most of the day looking at retro game consoles, game cassettes and anime merchandise. I was stopped from entering the Men's section at an adult store though. I'm upset at that. WHY??? My friend reckoned that it's because of the chauvinistic culture. Perhaps they think it's too disturbing or offensive to females. Maybe. I'm still annoyed. In fact in some of the shops which sell DVDs of semi-naked girls, some of the girls featured were barely 12 years old!!! THAT was well disturbing. Sorry boys, no soiled underwear though. Just tons of cosplay costumes or wannabe sexy outfits. I was hooked on this awesome retro zombies ate my neighbours game while we were in Super Potato.

Well maybe I should describe my NYE experience in Japan. It's my second time spending NYE outside Singapore. My first was the surreal experience in Prague in 2008. Now I spent it in Shibuya. Before the party, I had dinner with A at a restaurant nearby, complete with a unlimited drinks buffet for an hour. That was good, although i was so full by the time we left. We polished off quite a few glasses of beer, wine & sake with our pizza & pasta. So we went back to wait for the countdown to happen, but I was merely just being pushed around by a quickly swelling crowd. I've never seen so many gaijins in Tokyo until that night. Every tourist is out and about, and the crisp winter air is thick with anticipation. I was stuck in the human jam for the longest time and I was merely trying to stay alive in the madness. Finally, some people pulled the tabs off their beer cans & cheered Happy New Year! I checked for the time and it was already 12:05am. THERE WAS NO COUNTDOWN. ZILCH. What a waste of our efforts!

On the bright side however, the atmosphere was electrifying even without any celebratory events. The crowd just went crazy and everyone was screaming Happy New Year at random strangers. Some people decided to take off their clothes in the freezing cold and dance around with their friends. It was just good to stand by the side to watch the entire spectacle. I moved on to a bar with A soon after. It was another good random night, even though he left me alone for about half the time. I was chatting with random people in the narrow bar and I found myself dancing with random people. It was really nice because everyone was just friendly and high. Not long after, this American boy spoke to me in japanese and I had to explain once more that I'm not japanese. The gist of his opening speech was you're a great dancer... blah blah blah. Haha, not very original but I gave him my number anyway. (I know he wouldn't contact me, because when A came back for me, American-boy-who-works-as-a-model had his arms around another girl.) His friend said the same thing to me again when American boy ditched him to give full attention to the aforementioned girl. Haha. Overall, it was a good night. Bless Tokyo for night trains on New Year's Day. I left the bar at 2.30pm and I got home at 4+am.

New Year's Day was really nice too. Everyone was tired from the NYE activities, so we mostly stayed in. My mates from the guesthouse suggested we go for a dinner that night, so we set off for Kichijoji. We were all starving and thus we settled for Yakiniku for dinner. I haven't laughed so much in ages, it was a really really good evening spent with good company. Pei (my SMU schoolmate who crashed at my place for more than a week here) joined us too and it was just really cosy, sitting around the grill eating barbecued meat, drinking beer and talking in a mixture of Japanese and English. I felt really at home. Well a lot of the laughter was due to my japanese- i had brought along Pei's Lonely Planet phrase book and I tried the pickup lines on my Japanese friends. They were utterly tickled by it. I also found out that I really enjoy screaming SUMIMASEN to get the server's attention. I also managed to order beer AND also requested for less foam/head successfully. It was textbook I must say. A pat on the back, thank you very much.

Thankfully, boy issues seem to be sorted for now. My fingers are crossed for 2011. All the best to you too.