Getting old is scary

I definitely believe I am a person with a young spirit. I still feel as though high school was just yesterday and I haven't aged a day since then. Life though has a very funny way of offering up moments of clarity so intense that a 1080 hd television looks fuzzy and gray.
I turned 28 last Friday and while i still feel as though this is not an "old" age the definite realization that I'm a grown up and I can't hide from it any longer has made my nights lets just say, far more restless. This is a big year for our little family as far as realizing how big our kids are getting. Natalie is going to be 8 and getting baptized in August and I now find myself questioning all of my parenting skills over the past 8 years and how the crap did it get here over night?!?!? My daughter is going to soon be found accountable for every roll of the eyes, stomp up the stairs, slam of the door, and slip of the tongue which is usually in the sound of "ehhhhEHHHHHehhhhhhhh." (I know you all know what I mean.) Now I'm worrying about stuff my mom worries about. Did I do a good job, is she respectful, is she confident, does she have a testimony, will she stand up for what is right? On top of all of that my 3rd kid starts Kindergarten just a few weeks after that and I have already succumbed to the idea (and warned of it by her preschool teacher) that i will definitely be getting notes home from kindergarten for Madison's behavior and to just be prepared for it. And while my daughter is not a bad kid, she is definitely full of energy and very stubborn with the ideas that she gets in her head. I'm not sure how to handle the teachers looking at me as though I've raised this uncontrollable ball of energy and haven't done anything to contain it. While I know that I have tried EVERYTHING in my power to steer her down the right road when i dream of the road she takes to adulthood it is always winding, very bumpy, with a few spots of, let's just call them shadows opposed to darkness. Not in any way do I think she is evil, she is just one of these people who won't learn from anything but her own experience and it still might take a few of her own before the lesson really sinks in.

What is most scary is that these are the minor concerns on my list, the past 10 years since i met Nathan have flown by faster than the wind carried my kids kindergarten registration papers down the street last week. I just barely blinked and they were gone. What is terrifying about that is that in another 10, Natalie will be 18 and our time with her at home will be finished. AAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!! I'm too young to worry about boys dating my daughters and girls dating my son, but the time is short at hand when we will be buying a shot gun to shine on the front porch as they approach my house to adore my kids. Natalie will be in a school with sixth graders in august, sixth graders know and talk about things i don't know and don't want to talk about. I have really learned how much I took advantage of childhood. Why didn't any of us listen to the wise old adage of "ignorance is bliss". I know that I would give almost anything to have just one day where I could live my life this way again. Even just a few hours where i didn't have to worry about sex, drugs, alcohol, and all the other insanely moral issues my little children go out and face in this world everyday would be truly welcomed. Really all can say is exactly what i started with, Getting old is really scary!!