A Whispering Sound From My Heart

"Hurt" is the only word I can say to express my feeling
Your changes really hurt me so much
Honestly,
I'm not sure if you really change or not
Maybe it is true,but I hope it will be fake
Maybe it is fake,but true or fake,your changes really hurt me to the deepest

I'm very depressed because of you for this few days
I didnt talk at all during work for 3 days because I dont have the mood to talk
I made Vad cried because of my emotional breakdown
I argue with Vad and Becca because I cant control my feeling anymore
I get sick because Im too stress of my job and you
I cant sleep well because I keep thinking of your changes
I slept at 7a.m today and wake up at 9a.m to get ready to work
I dont have the mood to care bout my meal till I almost get food poisoning today
I dont want to blog because I scare you and your love one will mind about what is in my mind
But I have no choice
I cant hold my feeling anymore
I really feel so hurt because of your changes

I just cant believe you changed till willing to ask me to stay besides you as a friend or just leave you alone
Im very hurt because of this
All I want is just to stay beside you forever as a good friend
But you seems like trying to get rid of me from your life
I feel that you really dont want me in your life anymore
That's why I scare to text you
I scare you will try to make me stay away from you again
I just want to be with you
I just want to start all over again
We talk to each other,we laugh together,we say "good night" to each other before we sleep

Because of you,
I want to change myself
I try to have a positive mind in my daily
I want to stay in positive thinking
But why you want to force me to be in negative thinking??
Why you want me to give up??
Giving up is just like asking me to end my life
Not giving up is the only thing that can keep me stay alive
But why you hate me for not giving up??

Silly girl,
All I want is your old one
Where are you??
Fei Zai are very hurt because of your new one
Can you the old one come back just for Fei Zai??

Good Bye my blog
Thanks for letting me voice out my feeling
I wish you will stay beside me whenever I need you
:(

Is officially close from now on
If you dont like it,
Then please kindly leave my blog

I dont know what to say anymore
1 month passed so fast
I promised you that I will changed myself in this 1 month time
My attitude,my emotional,my rational thinking and many more
I really try my best to do it for you and for myself
Even Vad and Becca are able to see a little bit changes of me
And they are very proud of the changes I had make

You are back now
Which mean I can keep in touch with you all the day
But the way you reply my message,
Is making me feel that you had forget about me
You lost the feeling to care about me anymore
I dont dare to text you
Because I feel that Im just bothering you
The reply from you are short and it's making me feel that you want to end our conversation as fast as you want
I dont know
I really dont know what you want
Do you want me to just disappear from your memory?
If you are happy with your decision,
Then I will do it for you
I will just stay away from you as you wish

You are the moon and Im the stars
Because stars will never leave the moon to be alone
But the moon are making the stars feel uncomfortable
And she is making the stars to feel scare of staying close with her
Not only that,
She is making the stars to feel confusing whether he should stay beside the moon,
Or just explode to become ashes in the space,vanish and gone forever
Deep inside the heart of the stars,
He only wish for 1 thing now
The star wish that he can stay beside the moon forever
But he feel that the moon want the stars to leave forever
The stars is just like me,
Confusing about what I should do now

I Dont Know What To Do :(

It is already 1 week I work for non-stop
I feel so tired for now
Dont have the mood to blog for today

Dear silly girl is coming back from Australia now
I hope she will have a safe flight with her family.
The flight took around 9 hours
Hope she will be fine

Logging off
Nitez all!!

Hmmm
This few days,
I had been very busy working
From 2p.m till 7p.m,
Customers keep coming non-stop
And I keep toasting the bread non-stop
Im so tired :(
I need more rest!!!

2 more days and dear will be back to Malaysia
I cant wait for it
>.<
I miss her so much!!!

Things that had happened is fate between us
Maybe God is testing both of us
But,who know?
No one will know what will happen

Some people say we just need to let the fate to show our future
I agree with that
But I wont let the fate to take over my future
I will fight for my future
I will fight my fate if I have to
Im not going to give up
Never ever!!!

Im in pain
My foot are so pain
Seems like some blister are growing on my foot
I cant walk comfortable :(

My finger are in pain
I accidentally cut my finger today
Today is quite a bad luck for me
:(

But I cheer up myself by making Milo Blend during working
My 1st time blending something to drink ^^
Is kinda successful
FYI,Milo Blend doesnt exist in our menu list
Only staff can make it and drink it by their own
Dont try so hard to beg me for making you one!!
Yummy!! (Dear,come pay me a visit when you are back from Australia and I promise will give you a Milo Blend or watever Blend you want!! =P)
Dont feel jealous,everyone!!
But Im always berat sebelah!!!
Muahahaha!!!

Moving to bed now
Nitez all!!