My life - Decisions in life 1

So as many of my friends have known now I'm making probably the biggest decision in life to move back to Singapore.

So this is my life,

 Here's a little background of myself, I've moved here to Gold Coast, Australia since I was 12, right after primary school, not like everyone else, I did not go through the process of filling up that form to enter Secondary school together with my friends, if I actually stayed there was probably a 95% I would be in Ngee Ann Sec tgt with my close friends. I really hated life back then to be apart from all my good friends I've made in Primary 5 and 6. (Before that I was from Meridian Primary P1-4, then I moved to my grandparents and changed school) They were really all my favourite people and my only oh so special friends I had, I cherished them a lot because I've already lost contact with ALL my Meridian friends (social media wasn't as active back then, and I guess everyone just drifted, I was busy with adapting to changes in my life), everyday in school was happy and every weekend was spent at its best, out with friends, almost no curfew(i had my own principle to come home before the sky was dark, or call to get picked up), Sunday brunch with family, buying toys, having enough pocket money to buy food n junk, and all a little girl could ever wished for. Life was really really happy back then with my fav cutest grandparents and it was probably the closest time with them tgt with my mom and brother.

I moved here in 2006, only realizing 80% of the Asians here were spoilt brats, I didn't even go to a private school, private school kids were worse, they think very highly of themselves and its then I know friends had to be chosen very wisely, kids here were so much more mature (cus majority of them were away from their family) I've slowly learnt that I couldn't be so naive that everyone were friends, it wasn't as easy as I thought I'd make friends. I'm generally closer to Asians because I still felt the 'similarity' between us, I tried at the beginning of schooling to mix with Aussies but I couldn't click that well cus they were all from the same school before high school, but I still had a few close friends in class, just not outside of school. So I decided to join my brothers friends, I can say that all along I acted and think older than my age because I grew up with almost NO friends of my same age, everyone were at least 2 years older (my brother's age). But after my bro left to serve the nation in SG, I had a housemate, We partied, we drank, we went out till late, night drives, mountain racing and what not. But I can say at any of these stage in my life, I wasn't a rebel, I didn't n couldn't go against any of my mom's wish cus I respected her a lot and knew whatever she said was true. I was scared to do a lot of things, sneaking into clubs were my biggest fear and limits LOL.  People here were from all over the world, taiwanese, hk, msia, china etc and as everyone left high school, we all drifted, and had our own lives.

Throughout all these I still kept in contact with my friends in SG cus I felt that they were still truly my friends I can keep for life, and every time someone asks me how am I, I will always reply the same ' I'M BORED'. I was sick with people here, having no goals in life, didn't know what they wanted other than being very materialistic, spending all of their parents money and asking for more, all on I can categorize them as show offs. (which i can never uds of? its just the few of us in this community who are you trying to impress?) I went back to SG very often back then to visit my grandparents, my grandma left us first after the first year I was here, followed by my grandpa in 2009, then everything changed, I went back only I graduated high school for holidays and didn't look forward to holidays anymore. I was devastated and it somehow changed my life, I would rather stay at home and spend time with my sg friends online than go out aimlessly with my bunch of friends here. I met knew friends every single time I went back, because my friends would introduce me to their new friends and I met a lot of new people, and ended being very good friends with a few.

I wasn't expecting much from uni life, my mom would constantly psycho me that I'd find friends for life in uni and keep my eyes open for all the opportunities given in life while at uni, but I guess I had no expectations of that and I still only mixed with my few old friends, whoever were still here after highschool, some of them had already graduated and left Aust for good, and some just moved to another state. I couldn't rlly give much attention to people in school, I only made a few closer friends from uni and friends outside. I always believed in quality not quantity. Uni is 100km from home, I trained it back n fro the first year, moved away home the second year, and my final sem now I moved back home because then.. So long as I know this isn't a place that I want to spend the rest of my life at. I'm still young, I don't want to be stuck here. I made the biggest decision in my life to move back to Singapore, ALONE. Being barely 20 yro yet, this is the biggest step I'm taking thus far, and it's already 3/4 of 2013, planning needs to start like right now.

So yeappp here I am, having all sorts of thoughts and things to consider about moving back to a new yet familiar place.. A very brave move somehow I can say but I know it's something I wouldn't regret. I've never really even thought of how life would be if I stayed in Aust after I grad. I wish we all just didn't need to grow up...

I'll continue this in the next post or its gonna be very very wordy.

LATERS!

Take a leap of faith 

My Thursdays

Thursday classes ended at 330, happy sick me happily drove another 100km back from school. And I still got caught in a jam?! 330pm jam??! I don't understand, do people even finish work at 330?? o.x 

Somehow psychoed mom to go shopping with me and then dinner lol..

While waiting for our massive takeaways..

Our exaggerated dinner.. And because I missed the food at ZEN too. Ordered wayy too much I think I can eat them for the next few days LOL

Shoppings

 

Having my mom capture this split shot was pretty fail, good in away theres 3 me, but fail because the stool has 2 legs lolol

-sometimes i wish there was 3 of me so I don't need to handle too much on my own, by myself. 

The difference between trying and trying too hard

Good Read - 30 things to stop doing to yourself

Something that I have to share after my friend shared it with me, really worth the read, you won't regret reading this :)

I was only gonna post what I thought made a lot of sense so this post doesn't have to be so wordy, but I realized ALL of them are pretty relevant to life, and I'd like to share them. I underlined ones I thought was more relevant to me.

When you stop chasing the wrong things you give
the right things a chance to catch you.

As Maria Robinson once said, “Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending.”  Nothing could be closer to the truth.  But before you can begin this process of transformation you have to stop doing the things that have been holding you back.
Here are some ideas to get you started:

1. Stop spending time with the wrong people. – Life is too short to spend time with people who suck the happiness out of you.  If someone wants you in their life, they’ll make room for you.  You shouldn’t have to fight for a spot.  Never, ever insist yourself to someone who continuously overlooks your worth.  And remember, it’s not the people that stand by your side when you’re at your best, but the ones who stand beside you when you’re at your worst that are your true friends.
2. Stop running from your problems. – Face them head on.  No, it won’t be easy.  There is no person in the world capable of flawlessly handling every punch thrown at them.  We aren’t supposed to be able to instantly solve problems.  That’s not how we’re made.  In fact, we’re made to get upset, sad, hurt, stumble and fall.  Because that’s the whole purpose of living – to face problems, learn, adapt, and solve them over the course of time.  This is what ultimately molds us into the person we become.
3. Stop lying to yourself. – You can lie to anyone else in the world, but you can’t lie to yourself.  Our lives improve only when we take chances, and the first and most difficult chance we can take is to be honest with ourselves.  Read The Road Less Traveled.
4. Stop putting your own needs on the back burner. – The most painful thing is losing yourself in the process of loving someone too much, and forgetting that you are special too.  Yes, help others; but help yourself too.  If there was ever a moment to follow your passion and do something that matters to you, that moment is now.
5. Stop trying to be someone you’re not. – One of the greatest challenges in life is being yourself in a world that’s trying to make you like everyone else.  Someone will always be prettier, someone will always be smarter, someone will always be younger, but they will never be you.  Don’t change so people will like you.  Be yourself and the right people will love the real you.
6. Stop trying to hold onto the past. – You can’t start the next chapter of your life if you keep re-reading your last one.
7. Stop being scared to make a mistake. – Doing something and getting it wrong is at least ten times more productive than doing nothing.  Every success has a trail of failures behind it, and every failure is leading towards success.  You end up regretting the things you did NOT do far more than the things you did.
8. Stop berating yourself for old mistakes. – We may love the wrong person and cry about the wrong things, but no matter how things go wrong, one thing is for sure, mistakes help us find the person and things that are right for us.  We all make mistakes, have struggles, and even regret things in our past.  But you are not your mistakes, you are not your struggles, and you are here NOW with the power to shape your day and your future.  Every single thing that has ever happened in your life is preparing you for a moment that is yet to come.
9. Stop trying to buy happiness. – Many of the things we desire are expensive.  But the truth is, the things that really satisfy us are totally free – love, laughter and working on our passions.
10. Stop exclusively looking to others for happiness. – If you’re not happy with who you are on the inside, you won’t be happy in a long-term relationship with anyone else either.  You have to create stability in your own life first before you can share it with someone else.  Read Stumbling on Happiness.
11. Stop being idle. – Don’t think too much or you’ll create a problem that wasn’t even there in the first place.  Evaluate situations and take decisive action.  You cannot change what you refuse to confront.  Making progress involves risk.  Period!  You can’t make it to second base with your foot on first.
12. Stop thinking you’re not ready. – Nobody ever feels 100% ready when an opportunity arises.  Because most great opportunities in life force us to grow beyond our comfort zones, which means we won’t feel totally comfortable at first.
13. Stop getting involved in relationships for the wrong reasons. – Relationships must be chosen wisely.  It’s better to be alone than to be in bad company.  There’s no need to rush.  If something is meant to be, it will happen – in the right time, with the right person, and for the best reason. Fall in love when you’re ready, not when you’re lonely.
14. Stop rejecting new relationships just because old ones didn’t work. – In life you’ll realize that there is a purpose for everyone you meet.  Some will test you, some will use you and some will teach you.  But most importantly, some will bring out the best in you.
15. Stop trying to compete against everyone else. – Don’t worry about what others are doing better than you.  Concentrate on beating your own records every day.  Success is a battle between YOU and YOURSELF only.
16. Stop being jealous of others. – Jealousy is the art of counting someone else’s blessings instead of your own.  Ask yourself this:  “What’s something I have that everyone wants?”
17. Stop complaining and feeling sorry for yourself. – Life’s curveballs are thrown for a reason – to shift your path in a direction that is meant for you.  You may not see or understand everything the moment it happens, and it may be tough.  But reflect back on those negative curveballs thrown at you in the past.  You’ll often see that eventually they led you to a better place, person, state of mind, or situation.  So smile!  Let everyone know that today you are a lot stronger than you were yesterday, and you will be.
18. Stop holding grudges. – Don’t live your life with hate in your heart.  You will end up hurting yourself more than the people you hate.  Forgiveness is not saying, “What you did to me is okay.”  It is saying, “I’m not going to let what you did to me ruin my happiness forever.”  Forgiveness is the answer… let go, find peace, liberate yourself!  And remember, forgiveness is not just for other people, it’s for you too.  If you must, forgive yourself, move on and try to do better next time.
19. Stop letting others bring you down to their level. – Refuse to lower your standards to accommodate those who refuse to raise theirs.
20. Stop wasting time explaining yourself to others. – Your friends don’t need it and your enemies won’t believe it anyway.  Just do what you know in your heart is right.
21. Stop doing the same things over and over without taking a break. – The time to take a deep breath is when you don’t have time for it.  If you keep doing what you’re doing, you’ll keep getting what you’re getting.  Sometimes you need to distance yourself to see things clearly.
22. Stop overlooking the beauty of small moments. – Enjoy the little things, because one day you may look back and discover they were the big things.  The best portion of your life will be the small, nameless moments you spend smiling with someone who matters to you.
23. Stop trying to make things perfect. – The real world doesn’t reward perfectionists, it rewards people who get things done.  Read Getting Things Done.
24. Stop following the path of least resistance. – Life is not easy, especially when you plan on achieving something worthwhile.  Don’t take the easy way out.  Do something extraordinary.
25. Stop acting like everything is fine if it isn’t. – It’s okay to fall apart for a little while.  You don’t always have to pretend to be strong, and there is no need to constantly prove that everything is going well.  You shouldn’t be concerned with what other people are thinking either – cry if you need to – it’s healthy to shed your tears.  The sooner you do, the sooner you will be able to smile again.
26. Stop blaming others for your troubles. – The extent to which you can achieve your dreams depends on the extent to which you take responsibility for your life.  When you blame others for what you’re going through, you deny responsibility – you give others power over that part of your life.
27. Stop trying to be everything to everyone. – Doing so is impossible, and trying will only burn you out.  But making one person smile CAN change the world.  Maybe not the whole world, but their world.  So narrow your focus.
28. Stop worrying so much. – Worry will not strip tomorrow of its burdens, it will strip today of its joy.  One way to check if something is worth mulling over is to ask yourself this question: “Will this matter in one year’s time?  Three years?  Five years?”  If not, then it’s not worth worrying about.
29. Stop focusing on what you don’t want to happen. – Focus on what you do want to happen.  Positive thinking is at the forefront of every great success story.  If you awake every morning with the thought that something wonderful will happen in your life today, and you pay close attention, you’ll often find that you’re right.
30. Stop being ungrateful. – No matter how good or bad you have it, wake up each day thankful for your life.  Someone somewhere else is desperately fighting for theirs.  Instead of thinking about what you’re missing, try thinking about what you have that everyone else is missing.

Source: X

Restless

Been sick for more than a week now, stubborn lazy me doesn't want to go visit the doctors, I tell myself everyday if this flu isn't going away the next day I'll go to the doctors.. But I still end up sleeping half of my day away. Hahaha and still drove to school on Monday and I'm going to school again tomorrow.. Who has time for doctors appointment? I'll just admit I'm plain lazy.

And today mommy stocked up on my fav ice cream!!! I used to eat a mini stick everyday (before I was sick) but now since this new fav only comes in the normal size I'll have one every second day :P

This is bad but I started eating junk again today, but it somehow tastes better when I'm having flu cus it tastes less salty hehh

Too much sleep

Sick me

Ended up being really really sick, sickest I've been in awhile.. Fever flu sore throat and whatnot!! I super hate the change of season, always making me ill, but I'll have to blame my mother for passing it to me -.- and plotting my death by feeding me all sorts of medicine and food a sick patient shouldn't eat.. Sometimes I think if I'm more of the 'mother' than my mom is. 

And I still had to go to school for my attendance and group work sigh.. Nearly died driving 200km yesterday. I'm mentally and physically drained. Was also my bf's birthday, felt even worse not being able to spend it with him.. Mehhh..

Till then x 

Midnight adventures

Biker Yangs 

I was dying sick in bed and my bro pulled me out of bed to ride this thingy, I wasn't too excited about it but it turned out pretty fun! Hehh I've got a video up on insta. Hahaha I think I'm ready to go bkk LOL

 

And today I'm dead in bed missing my b's shoulder

wehhhhhhh

Miles apart 

Baking brownies

Dinner is seriously not completed without desserts!! I've been craving for any sorts of desserts after meals esp dinner and this became a routine with my bf after we picked it up from Hong Kong! 

So I baked so brownies in my cute cuppies that I bought. I was gonna just make brownies in a mold but why not since my cuppies are so prettyyyyy ^^ 

Pooo

 

And then tonight again with maccas' sundae fudge

I'll be blogging about my hk trip soon so come back and check it out ok!! Esp if you're going to hk hehehe. Luvvit there 

Nothing is ever as bad as you think it is

Face on

Haven't been out with my full makeup on for awhile now, ever since I had my eyelash extension the whole time I was in Sg. Now without them I feel so much more bare but comfortable tho! Can rub my eyes all I want!! 

Almost forgotten how to draw eyeliner on myself! And finally got to use eyelashes I bought from hk! 

Went out to leave my resume, got too bored at home so I decided to do smth during my weekends mehhhh 

Went grocery shopping too, came home with new clothes and new sunnies, ok I think its still better for me to stay home :( 

Thumbs up for me for blogging 3 days in a row?? muahaha

Me against the world

Ootd

TGIF!!! Although it feels like TGIF everyday for me cus I only had one day of class this week woohooo! Slacker ish me. But I've got lots of self study to do! Note to self: be self disciplined please.

 And as I was clearing my room getting rid of my noticeboard thingy and sorting out my accessories that's been hanged there since forever and I never wear them anymore, I made bracelets and rings out of an old necklace yay! I love recycling old stuff to make new ones hehe

Went out for dinner with mama tonight, time to fill my belly with some satisfying jap food 😋

Some of the pics are better quality photos from my camera! Regretting not getting another semipro cam tho :( Anyone can intro me a good camera to invest on, my poor g12 has been neglected cus it doesnt have wifi :( and my new samsung cam's quality isnt too great either.. wehhhh

Happy weekend y'all!