this is officially closed down.



because i am not supposed to write on my own space if others dont like it.
*ouch*



i'm supposed to be happy or even act happy at all times in order to please others.





nvm. i will find somewhere else for my lou jiao chu.





its better to keep my mouth shut.



- more bricks n cement.

in need of TRUE AND LASTING T.L.C.




sadly, i dun believe in anything being lasting and things being mildly true to a certain extent.






try as u might, to convince me. but im not changing my mentality, not one bit at all.
yes, i dont hv a very pleasant outlook on life. but blame it on all the things that made me think this way.







dont feel like bloggin now. feeling deprieve of fun.

zoukkk here i come, finally!







- love me more than i love you, please.

i'm still trying and unfortunately, i still failed.

but i suggest doing some good deeds to redeem yourself because you will be condemned to the 100th level of hell soon. with the rest of the retards.




sad to still say, i do not have patience. never had them anyway.








can't wait for sups to be finished. i hv been at home for various reasons. :(



need to go out. must go out.


fun, where are you, fun?



-

sometimes ignorance is a bliss, isnt it... what you dont know cant possibly hurt you. well... at least for the time being. yes, that's living in denial but what's wrong with living in denial if you are happy. maybe at the end of the day, you will no longer be happy, but you're still happy once upon a time.












to digress abit...
someone ask how we started. well, i have no exact answer for that, not now, not tomorrow, not forever. because there was not much of a 'starting' to talk about...

it feels like being a swimmer plunging into a pool - next thing you know you are wet thru-out, and you don't know how deep is the pool since you can't tell from the top. drown in it or survive thru it, your choice. good thing is i know how to swim, bad thing is i suck in swimming. hahaha...







side-note: being drunk doesnt warrant you the rights to do stupid things. and being drunk certainly doesnt warrant you the rights to contridict yourself with every word spouted when you try to account for things you shld had NEVER done.
excuses i say, excuses!
as much as i STILL do not (in fact, virtually IMpossible to ever) believe your account of what happened, i have NO choice but to let the matter rest. what else could i possibly do anyway?
once - count yourself dumb
twice - i must the dumb one.
so forgive but not forget, once but never twice. i do not want to be a dumb person.






life doesnt always go the way you planned. work around it, don't let it get you down.




- this journey, called life, is never easy.

i must i must I MUST






forgive and forget
forgive and forget
forgive and forget
forgive and forget
forgive and forget
forgive and forget
forgive and forget
forgive and forget
forgive and forget
forgive and forget
forgive and forget
forgive and forget
forgive and forget
forgive and forget
forgive and forget
forgive and forget
forgive and forget
forgive and forget
forgive and forget
forgive and forget
forgive and forget
forgive and forget
forgive and forget
forgive and forget
forgive and forget
forgive and forget
forgive and forget
forgive and forget
forgive and forget
forgive and forget
forgive and forget
forgive and forget








I HATE THE WORLD. DONT ASK.

now dig that and fuck off.


this blog suck btw. i hate it so much, the tot of closing it down never leaves my head.




- stupid people reigns the world.

hello peepsss....



feeling much better althou i'm still hiding at home all day long.

bkk trip fall thru... onto the ground and shattered into a million pieces, unable to piece them back together.
if plans changes to kl roadtrip, (did i say roadtrip? ooppss, tedious bustrip sounds more like it actually. hahaha..) i see a higher possibility in it succeeding. HOPEFULLY! why on earth is my holidays so obstacles filled? f-up!



but on a lighter note, bintan trip with june seems more of a success since im fine with anitin n shes doin all the planning. kind of... hahaha....







just a gentle reminder, i dun need people to tell me what i can handle or what i can't. its none of their biz to begin with. or even to let a complete stranger tell me their experiences. why wld i care when i cant relate to them? its annoying. yes, bloody annoying... n dun come saying they are just being kind to share, cux i hv my own set of kind frens who underwent the same sharity-elephant elementary education too.


so please, MYOB.


but of cux, u will still see a nice and smiley me. until.......







- i'm not a bloody shu nu who walks behind someone's shadow. i perfer walking beside you, if not in front of you actually.

start of shitload of work. r headin back to brissy, like after ten thousand donkey years.

gotten my pinky camera ~ T77... cheerios... now now, needa find some time to head down to haji lane or arnd there to get my little blinggies to bling up my lappy n my cammy...


gonna order some stuff from NYX and waiting to head back to brissy next yr to buy stuff from BYS.




wondering if i will get any holidays at all. :( a long awaited one yet, hopes are GONE AGAIN. with bkk's airport expected to close till AT LEAST saturday, that's hope yeah... next to zero, that is... even if we get to fly into bangkok, the shops are probably closed, BECAUSE i'm expecting at least some, if not quite a handful, of shopkeepers are these retarded protestants...





wondering if we could change it to tw/hk? wahaha... highly impossible thou...


no holidays. no fun. no life. GREAT! that's how i'm lovin' everythin'! *rolls eyes*


and so, i will be stuck in singapore. and be lying on my bed 24/7 cux i dun even wanna go find any job to work my ass off.


lazy to continue to blog. feel sleepy again. yawns...





- i just wanted a getaway... that proves too much a impossible thing.

my life is screwed up in more than a way. so sucky i feel like shit.


yes i feel v lousy now. cant talk about it here. my blog yet i cant express my thoughts, so wtf...

in short, people dun always accept u for who u really are even if they say they do. cuz it's in their small little actions n things they say tat says otherwise. yes, i feel u - hurt. but wat can u do, really? i suggest hiding this emotion, bury it deep within u so tat no one else knows.

painful, i hear u say. but tat's probably the only sensible thing to do if u wan everyone to be happy, or at least seems superficially happy.



i dunno wat exactly is e underlying problem tat's making me feel so down. no, it's not pms if tat's wat u're thinking of right now. i dunno. n i hope to feel better soon. thou i know i probably wun.



wat exactly is wrong with me?


: '(




come home soon.

world comes kinda crashin' down

demoralised.



sad.





feeling like shittt.






wonderin' if i could make it somehow.




hate this.












- deadmeat.