AidahBurne
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Saturday, January 31, 2009
sexxx cult is THE way to go
& i got INKSPELL! i made a move at 9:51 PM Thursday, January 29, 2009 people? what people? school is very hardcore today. pffft. back to back without break. im kinda proud that i actually went accounts lecture (make-up lecture, no less), & leadership lecture. =)) you know i read somewhere that if you have been coughing for like very long, it's one of the sign of cancer. wahh that one like giving me early heart attack la. remind me to go back to the doctor for x-ray. tomorrow would be good! go doctor, take MC, skip ob make up class & be happy. ohh, & waste money. & i think ferhan forgot he actually gave me an assigment to do by today. in his attempt to make me more sociable (which i obviously didn't do cause im a born misanthrope & people scares me). now, talk about small miracles! 'if that was a ghost walking pass you, you shouldnt be scared, i mean you see them, aidah!' cause i thought Justin was a ghost & i screamed my lungs out, laughed & cried at the same time & can't breathe. okay nights! i made a move at 11:30 PM Tuesday, January 27, 2009 eclipse
let's see now, i slept through a solar eclipse! i bloody slept through it! AND AHHHH! okay, i went to the mortuary on a cold dark night. like you know, telling the poor dead souls to like make a grand exit from earth or something. wait, i have never seen a corpse. i'm lacking in school work this semester & i don't know why. so now, im gonna make myself a tuna & cheese sandwich. i'll have to settle my leadership presentation, too. i can't wait for this saturday! right, g'day. i made a move at 6:29 PM Monday, January 26, 2009 to get life.. it's difficult living like this. i dont know if its even right to be feeling like this everytime. i hate pain. i have a phobia of sharp objects & therefore, i have a phobia of physical pain. but now, i'd rather have it than this dull heart ache in my heart. emotions are a hassle. if there's just a way to sort it out.. waduuh pusing. i want things to be different. funny, how everyone seems to be saying this. now i've fallen into the category of normal people. ugggh you say i don't try hard enough. but how enough is enough? i thought i was being nice doing all those things for you. i dont know but maybe it's just me that feels like i went out of my way to make you happy only to be treated like this. who needs to take pity on who now, you tell me? its okay. i don't want it. when i want pity i'll do pity. like give a bloody pitiful sick face until the doctor offered to give me an MC. now, that's love. & that story i wrote two days ago, i hate it. i hate it cause now, it seems like my life & the story is becoming one. & so, im not even going to continue it. what if it comes true? the only part i want it to come true is if i, like the girl, can fly off to amsterdam & disappear for 18 months. i, like the girl, can make a guy missed her so much its killing him inside. where did my psychotic sadistic self go? its so much easier being her. i don't get you. you don't get me. i don't get us. life's a big joke, and guess what? idontgetit. have a good day. maybe yours will turn out good. I WANT MY FUCKING JIGSAW PUZZLE BACK, GWIN! & i'm craving for coffeebean. i made a move at 3:02 PM Saturday, January 24, 2009 fire-dancer
i had a great time in the cinemas so far. i thank you for your company yesterday! you're awesome even if im not the best person to drag around looking for make-ups. cause ive said it once i'll say it again, 'being a girl is expensive. i don't like it' leadership proj meeting was cool just now. went & caught inkheart with ferhan. FINALLY, MY INKHEART! awww shit, im such a sucker for the anti-hero. & i think baidura knows how much i love jennifer connelly. i need more of dustfinger! i'm crazy over the ink trilogy. & syirah has gone insane about twilight cast. happy chinese new year, by the way. =)) holiday till thursday. yeah, school rock, like that! i'm patiently waiting for defiance & valkyrie to hit the cinemas. i love war movies, don't you? my legs fail the floor. i made a move at 8:18 PM Thursday, January 22, 2009 permanent will you think you're all alone when no one's there to hold your hand? when all you know seems so far away and everything is temporary, rest your head i'm permanent this is a nice sad song. Permanent. =)) g'night. i made a move at 10:33 PM Wednesday, January 21, 2009 do solemnly swear..
the inauguration yesterday was awesome smitchum! i'm sorry, i have the knack for liking people that the majority don't like. then at 1.05 Singapore time, he took his oath. ive got about less than 40 minutes to do this post cause the battery is dying & im too okay, no. i have conveyancing to do. the Devil love me so much, He has to visit me everytime i sleep. i know im very weird! i miss watching Golden Globe or Oscar and at the same time sms-ing bai asking her to go check out the actress dress! =( my heroes up in the sky. i made a move at 3:27 PM Monday, January 19, 2009 conveyancing is cute (without the e)
but i think its nice! i want to live in a house like this. i know you've got crazy running rampant through your mind right now! but, picture that house somewhere sunny, lovely & beautiful. like amsterdam. right.. amsterdam sunny lovely & beautiful not? & i want a tree stump to the right or left of the front door! then can sit down on it & be like smurf! smurf, you know, the blue weird pixie-like creatures. i like smurf! =)) i want to skip conveyancing class tmr. 9am really not funny. i plan to skip until i look at the CPF form & i realised i have no idea how to fill them up. uggggh. okay, see you tmr Mr Chia. i hope accounts test would be good tmr. please! i want to get A! wahhh tmr 9am to 9 pm. office hours also lose hands down. -.- i think my lungs will soon collapsed. this constant coughing sucks la. & the fever. its all in the mind. all in the mind, says henderik. & tell me where i can go get cheap frames. 21 by 24 (or whatever the person say just now!) don't tell me ikea. cause that's the first place i thought of (or maybe THE ONLY place i thought of) okay. g'night & tmr is the day! yeah! change has come =)) i made a move at 9:43 PM Saturday, January 17, 2009 here's the plan, john! if exxageration had got a better hold of me, i would have said that i had spend half of my 24 hours today on bus rides. but reality say otherwise, so otherwise it is. despite that fact, i have leg cramps la spending a glorious 3 hours in the bus for today! ugggghhh. this explains why everytime people ask me go malaysia in a godforgiven car (or bus) i want to cry bloody tears. the pit stops does not help. i repeat help, it does not. i had to hold my pee in most of the time! cause you know i know we all know. SO ANYWAY! i met ferhan today! =)) we went to watch Passengers. what stupid movie. so bloody slow. he's cousin say already the show boring he still want to watch. i think inside camp he veryy deprived of entertainment. & he refused to eat. which left me with no option but to starve along with him cause even if i buy food, he will disturbed it & end up eating half of it. at this rate, i will accelerate my gastric problem & lose weight big time! WOOOOO! ..... ..... ..... NOT! we all know of my random cravings for popeyes, subway (done!), pizza hut, kfc. constant munching of chips, hershey chocolates... i hate projects. they make me fat. & then i took 518 to TTSH after ferhan left. but before that, alone in this world, i roam novena square. i think window shop alone veryy fun. i have no arah tujuan. & i bought this cool bracelet! ohoh, we sat at this void deck & he told stories of what happened in camp. i think camp very fun! okayy, camp minus the 2 hours walk they have to take and the exercise. i will kill myself. i want to know if mats actually know the existence of ear piece. cause seriously, i find them blasting music so loudly on their phones in the bus veryy irritating la. & can see from my mother face she bingit already. uggggh. & they say WE are the future. WE will be the downfall of our country at the rate we're going. & i think the buildings outside the parameter of TTSH can be used to make ghost movie! very cool! i like ahh. i even got time to pose for a picture in the middle of the night there. then abah with his "ahh i can see a figure beside you" what crap. if he see means i see la. i think he saw my fat shadow. my father ahh.. tsktsk. i made a move at 11:39 PM Friday, January 16, 2009 mosque timetable, anyone? the veryy strong winds in Singapore is making me shiver & made me hide my hands in between my armpits. HAHA. & its making my hair dry. ughhh. i'll will start back the long forgotten habit of going around with a moisturiser in my bag. & my hair is like all over the place. i think people go moshing also not this bad. today has not been that good to me. i forgot to bring the progress report for ob. & that was at 3.30 deadline was at 5. & we were not even done compiling. according to li ying that piece of report cost us $12.20 cause we took taxi to and from my house. all in all ob report is done. =)) left with the presentation which is this coming tuesday. i hate tuesdays. this accounts test and presentation has just doubled that hatred. i played squash for the first time today! haha. i went inside the court feeling very confident please! then when i served ahh, li ying burst out laughing. sorry, i forgot that wasn't tennis. in the bus, there was this makcik who sat beside me. she asked if she could borrow my phone to call her daughter to ask if there is a syarahan ( what's this in english ahhh?) at the mosque. so i dialled la the number. & the house phone. & no one answered so she resorted to making small talks with me. & we all know how i hate small talks especially when im in a bad mood. i think got la right she ask me if today at istighfar got any syarahan. hahaha. if i was in a good mood i would have laughed out loud. very wrong person to ask. i think if abah or ferhan was there maybe they can help answer her question. since im not, i politely told her i have no idea & proceed to plug in my ear piece back where it belonged before she disturbed my peaceful musing in the bus i made a move at 10:36 PM Wednesday, January 14, 2009 so you felt what you dont know
God knows when this was taken. it occured to me that when i go out with ferhan & bai, the photos we took are few and far between. & considering the fact i like taking photos, that's an achievement! i don't think im cut out to work for a law firm. i hate clients. seriously. they ask so many questions, stupid ones at that. & i am veryy certain the real clients out there are veryy bitchy too. i had this talk show with lois about lingerie causing cancer. it was ... an unexpected topic. i expected more like, what sort of lingerie you like and you know.. but this is lois we're talking about. i met bai in the afternoon after so long! & it was nice meeting her who will patiently sit down & wait as i slowly finish up my food. for the past erhhh 7 years ive known her she has never ask me to hurry up & finish my food. & we had some veryyy interesting thing going on now. thanks to this ferhan. who is in camp & still manage to create havoc in our lives. & we had this awesome 3 hours phone call which lasted till early in the morning. its a like a tsunami. all the stories pour forth. haha. today is my self declared school holiday. so i didnt go to school. instead, i stalked 'izzul in school! ive got pictures of him during his refreshment break all. syimir just editted sylar's photo. & sylar look even more hotter! ahhhs... with the eyes all. i miss heroes. ive got this plot in my head. ive told bai about it & she say its a sweet story. so im waiting for the right moment to type it all out.. goodnight. you give me the power to sit & pretend i made a move at 8:59 PM Sunday, January 11, 2009 unite for children there are certain events in your life that would seriously put things in perspective. i have never once imagined i'd face this so soon. i'd never thought i'll see someone so sick, that i want God to be merciful and take her away. seeing her in bed & at the hospital suffering like that pains me. miracles happen right? but we all have to accept the fact if it doesnt. with regards to project, i've got OB & Leadership left to do. & conveyancing role play. the deadlines due pretty soon. back to back. ohh pressure. i'm suffocating thinking of my semester this year which is so damn screwed. i fucking hate company law. it has never once given me much reason to love it. i cannot afford a goddamn bloody C! you get it or not ahh company law?! i've noticed something peculiar about my mother. i think this time, she has lost it. & i get so damn amused looking at her. it frustrate me also. wahh, i feel like im carrying the burden of the world on my shoulder. i'm worried about so many things. i dont like children. you all know right? i cannot stand them. i feel like killing them. cause half of the children here that i interact with in singapore are bloody spoiled brats. they along with their arrogant parents. uggggh. scums. but i also cannot stand seeing children being abused, hurt, dead & injured. & therefore, i really really want to join the unicef. 257 children are dead in Gaza. & child sex slave. & AIDS. i have a lot of dreams and ambitions. i havent even get diploma. this is depressing shit. & ferhan's going back to camp soon. =)) i want to watch Passengers! it seems like a cool show. just because someone doesnt love you the way you want them to doesnt mean they dont love you with all they have. & this is so true with regards to so many people in my life. i made a move at 6:00 PM Saturday, January 10, 2009 close your eyes..
between you & me, death is just an arm's length away no one will emerge victorious out of this whole ghastly ordeal. maybe ordeal is too weak a word. disaster? massacre? & i think its beyond crazy how this Israel can still declare tougher war on Hamas. Hamas should just burn & die too. do you see victory in death? to ask, 'why can't they just shake hand, sign treaty & be happy?' would be too much to ask for right? but one can hope. lets pray. ::::::::::::::::::: yesterday was a very FUBAR day. the only silver lining was me meeting ferhan for a bit. for less than like 10 minutes. my company law is like beyond screwed. & cause i handed up late (by like less than a minute. to God i swear) i got 5 marks minus off. which means i dropped a grade. pfft.. & i skipped leadership yesterday cause i dont feel like going. yeah. & i was trying to clear out my annual leave which tp gives its student. its a new year & i wanted to do something i never tried before like inhaling helium gas from ' i love tp' balloons. which i did. it has a funny taste to it. & i look funny in the video so im not gonna post it up. i think i inhale it too fast that i got headache soon after. i pass the rest of the gas to nas who sounded funny as hell in his donald duck voice. shaun sham & i went to coffeebean to sit down & talk. before i made my way to ferhan's house with his pure vanilla drink in my hand. & i saw him in his uniform! HAHAHA. =)) when i got there, abah called saying nyanyi nazak at sembawang. & when i got there, the atmosphere was very somber. i just can't say it, you know. im going to go off now. & then to the hospital.
i made a move at 12:00 PM Wednesday, January 07, 2009 Hope why do you grow up so fast? what do you grow up for? i sent the awesome cute devilish ZulB to school just now. & i've got to be the only person in the family who calls him zulb. which he will reply with "Yes kakak ain b?!!" seeing him so happy to go to school makes me realised how fast he grows. how fast we all grow up. what do we grow up for? what will we be? where will we go? cause these children will never ever know. because they have been robbed off their lives. because they are the victims of the arrogance of the grown up.    these are civilians. the rising death toll is atrocious. this is inhuman. what does it matter if you're a jew, a gypsy, a christian, a muslim? we all want to live. & who gives you the right to steal their life away from them. why are we humans playing God? this is wretched. is there no better alternative than a bloodbath? there are more pictures like these out there. mass burial, father carrying her wounded daughter, a child buried among the rubbles, a man with burned skin. & i cried looking at them. its so painful and sad. here we are living a life of luxury and we have no bloody idea what existed at the other end of the world. these people's deaths are in vain. nothing's gonna change. just another nameless victim on the street. & for fuck's sake, if not for your God, stop it already. you're fucking going on a killing spree! i take comfort in the knowledge that these children & the other victims out there doesn't have to face anymore violence from any one any more. i mean now that they're gone, their misery ends. & that God will place these little souls in heaven. give them peace that they never have. & thank you. i don't think much of God everyday. but i do when i look at these nameless victims. We praise you and live like we don't If you'd ask do we love you still Sometimes I can't tell the world is such a mess. but somewhere there is hope. You are still my hope. & i love Nevertheless cause even though they're a christian punk band, their songs are damn cool. cause the 'you' in the lyrics could only refer to God. & yes, He is still people's hope. & i need to change how i live my life. like maybe start caring if the food i eat is actually halal. ... ... ... goodnight. it has been traumatising for me. & i hope i can sleep without seeing dead children with blood pouring out of their wounds i made a move at 11:25 PM Tuesday, January 06, 2009 of straw hats and facebook  OB class means a class where we keep running out off to do something stupid like wearing a straw hat to look like a saman lady. you know, the one who gives parking ticket. yeah. so somewhere out there, Ferhan is in camp doing god knows what & here i am taking stupid pictures in the toilet. HAAA. & 3 more days to end of Company Law. oh yeah baby yeah! we're going Ikea tomorrow. & volunteer for the open house on thursday. & maybe Jam & Hop saturday night. IP Man on friday. whatever it is, even if the plans dont happen, i'm going to celebrate the end of company law. i'm going to go to school late tomorrow cause i want to send 'izzul off to school! i heard from syirah there's a girl in school who keeps following my brother around. very cute please this 5 years old devils. oh, i'm in a relationship in facebook! with liying! HAHA. i think facebook is veryy conservative. they promote monogamy very well. we realised that we cannot be in a relationship with more than one person. very good facebook. the conversation in ilaw with liying lata nas & eventually sham about relationship status, making out, polygamy and whatnots was very entertaining! all in the middle of company law! not bad ehh. haha. ::::::::::::::::::: okay, so far it doesn't seem so bad. but who am i to say. its still too early. i hope everything is okay at the other end. & henderik needs to stop scaring me with story of blanket party. that's just not funny. finally, i got this all black umbrella from Ferhan. now i can't wait for it to rain so i can finally use it! kental! but you know, it'll look so cool. like as if im going to a funeral or something. & i also don't know why this Ferhan entertain my nonsense sia! tkvm though. back to company law. goodnight. i made a move at 11:39 PM Sunday, January 04, 2009 help! i had a pretty good day, you know. i thought syirah the art of facebook-ing, allow syimir full possession of my phone for a good 1 hour, irritate 'izzul & all. then i settled down to do my coveyancing tutorial when company law decides to be an epic bitch and spoil my day. its like strangling me alive you know this stupid senseless subject. i hate company law with a burning passion. i will fucking jump for joy the moment 9 Jan comes into my life & the moment i would be able to reliquish my hold on this company law report which has done a brilliant job thus far in making me lose the use of half of my mental faculty. this is one of those moments that i strongly belief with everything that i have that i am in the goddamn bloody wrong course! & a year from now when i happen to read this post again, i would probably be laughing at myself stupid cause by that time, i'd probably have something like corporate governance to bitch about. & company law would by then be peanuts. & i have nothing to look forward to anymore. ohh, chinese new year. =)) HAHA. by the way, i saw this guy wearing this pretty cool shirt that says 'say no to AIDS but yes to sex'. haha. & my brothers & i were walking through the park at night & 'izzul saw a couple standing facing each other. the guy had his hands on the girl's hip. so 'izzul ask loudly, 'ehh! ini patung ehh?' (ehh this one statue ehh?). Haaa. i'll go back to company law now. remind me to get a life after i graduate, please. i made a move at 5:22 PM Friday, January 02, 2009 2009 FTW =))
the new year was great. we went centrepoint to celebrate abah's birthday at Sanur. today is 'izzul's first day of school. & oh, i've watched bedtime stories!
& im trying to imagine my life minus this variable from the equation. i think it'll be good. a challenge. but good yeahh. cause you know, its a variable & its always changing and unknown, so im kind of excited about it. g'night. have a great weekend. i made a move at 10:03 PM
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illuminator
Aidah Burne I'm staying here until you make me move |
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