~Whole Lotta Love Wednesday~Blog Party still Happening!!

> My blog for today is going to be about helping a super great, mad cool, a little bit crazy friend raise money, to help find a cure for cancer!(All joking aside for a minute)She has a very precious family member that has non- Hodgkins Lymphoma and is battling for her life, as I write this!
So, in order to do this my friend Lani, MoM of TriPleTs and RuNneR, in her spare time(like SHE has any spare time), has decided to train for a MaRaThoN!!Now for those of you who don't run, a MaRatHoN is 26.2 MiLeS!!!!That is a looong way!!!A really looong way!!!I am getting tired just thinking about it and I run!! Here's the thing,she is willing to do all of the training herself!!HeHe!Now all we need to do is help her raise some money for her team!For just $ 1.00 you can have a chance to win all kinds of fabulous stuff!!Just $1.00!! Seriously, that is all you have to do!!!!Well, you can also follow her, blog about this party,tweet about it, and a few other things, that are all listed on her page.Just click on the button below and it will give you all of the information!
Oh and don't forget to let her know you found out about this from me because I really want to win SoMeThinG, AnYthinG!! I just love winning things don't you??Okay,come on my precious friends, let's get this BloG party started!!




Lani's Team In Training Page

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Twinkie Love!!

These are two of the reasons I get up every morning!
I am still learning how to upload pictures!! I hope you enjoy these.There will be more soon!

Update~County Jail Blues and other Running Thoughts

I wanted to write an update from my last post about going to visit my son,Jason.
Okay, so I am driving to the video visitation place and looking forward to at least seeing his handsome face on the screen, when I see all these blue lights and police cars everywhere. I knew right then that I wasn't going to get to visit with him.So while I am driving by the street that I was suppose to turn on a police officer comes to my window, and lets me know that the road is blocked off and that I have to keep going.He also informs me that there is an EsCaPeD Prisoner!!!So,I pull down onto a side street that isn't blocked, and park my car.I get out and start walking towards the visitation center and where the police is.I am very determined to see my son!Oh yeah, there are also helicopters going crazy above all of this too!!The police(same one) motions for me to come to him and then lets me know, very nicely, that no one is going down the street and all visits are cancelled!!Okay God,I know that it is just not meant to happen today!I did ask the police if the escapie is a young white kid(my son) and he reassures me that it is not him!!Yeay, I think laughing to myself! Yeah,I know a little crazy but it really is all so surreal at times.I walk back to my car and then I start thinking about this escaped prisoner and how he could jump out and grab me or something!!So know I'm walking like a very paranoid person and realizing that I am,oh, just a little bit touched! I mean how much excitement can a girl handle for one afternoon!?!
The saddest part is that I didn't get to see him and he didn't even know that I was coming! He called and told me that the next day!

I also wanted to write that I am just obssessed with my running!(My running peeps,I know you understand!)I mean I can't get anyone to watch my twinkies, so I can train! It really stinks!!I am always wondering when and if I'll be able to run and knowing that I will feel like crap if I don't! Plus my newest goal is to win a 5k within a year!!
I hope soon that I will be able to get my chubby bunnies back in our B.O.B stroller and head out! It is starting to cool off here!! Woo-Hoo!!!
Okay, I hope I didn't bore you to death!

I Would NEVER say ThAT!!!!

Okay. So my parents never said this to me, but I used to hear parents threaten to LeAvE their kids in Wal-Mart when it was time to go.
I thought that was horrible and also that it would NeVeR be Me! WrOnG!!!
When I was out at a Wal-Mart with my son Jason and he was around two.I let him know that it was time to "go". He threw his chubby little body down right there on that nasty, dirty floor, and I said,"if you don't get up and come with me RIGHT NoW,I am going to LeaVe you here!!"I actually said it!!! It worked though, and up he got himself up and came to me and out we went!!
I became that MEAN parent!! Maybe, just maybe they weren't so mean after all!!!

My County Jail Blues

Well, I'm sitting here at my computer wondering where I should begin.It is getting late but I have alot on my mind.I am going to visit my son tomorrow.I haven't seen him in over 3 weeks.
I don't really know how I feel about going to see him.It should be a happy occasion but instead it isn't! It really bites! You see my son Jason is incarcerated!Big fancy word for being in jail.I really don't get to see him anyway except through a video camera that projects his image onto a screen kind of like my computer.So I get to see his face on a computer.
I can't even begin to tell you how much it sucks having my son in jail.It hurts so much that if it weren't for my turning back to God and Jesus(because of this happening) I wouldn't be writing this, in the same capacity.
I don't know why this all had to happen, well ,I take that back.It was the only way God could get my sons full attention(his words) because he wanted nothing to do with anything right or being respectful of any rules or laws.I can't really go into the charges here yet because he still has to go to trial.
All I can say is it is very serious and the prosecuter wanted to originally give him 5 years!!That was the DEAL, as I always hear it said on T.V.Doesn't sound like much of a deal to me!!All, I can do as a Mom is hope and pray for the best possible outcome, for him. As it is, at this writing he will be a convicted FELON.A bad guy with a black mark on his life. Some days I can't even wrap my head around it all,ya know?
It sure has made me a better runner, though.I just channel all that anger, pain and frustration into my runs and voila this GiRL Can RuN!!!
I am smiling as I write this because what else can I do???So I train and run and train and run and that is part of all of my insanity that has most recently become my life.I've turned the painful and feelings of having no control into something productive, at least in a physical sense!! I am so down with that right now and it is working for me!
I'm thinking I better go for tonight but I will be updating on this as I learn more~

Thankful Thursday!!

I am so thankful for my children! I never knew how much of a dimension they would add to my life!They don't define who I am but who I am is in everything they do and everywhere they go!So, yes they are my LifE!
Then, of course my life wouldn't be the same without the TreAdMiLL at the gym.I have a love/hate relationship with that thing!Mostly love!So here's a funny picture for all of you!I hope all of you have a super day!!

P.P.A. Anxiety with a Vengeance why Me??

I am going to start writing where I left off in my profile, and before I started training for my first EveR half marathon!I will go back to right after the birth of my twins.
I had a wonderful birth!It was a scheduled c-section and was picture perfect!I was told they were doing just fine!
Here I am the first night after they were born, and I was in my hospital room in my bed!My nurse came in.She was an amazingly kind person.She gave me some medication and all of the sudden I started to feel the room closing in on me!!Yes just like that!! My heart started pounding and I felt Very panicky! Crazy panicky!!I was suddenly very scared!!! Now you have to remember that after a scheduled c-section you can't get out of your bed! Big problem for me all of the sudden!!I started freaking out and called for my nurse.I was having a full blown panic attack!!Now for those of you have never had one you feel like your going to have a heart attack or your going to die!!It is just plain freaky!! I begged her to stay with me and she did for TwO HouRs!! She just sat there and held my hand till I FiNaLLy calmed down! AMaZinG wonderful lady!I truly thank God for her!
So fast forward to taking our twins home and settling in, if there is such a thing.I felt real, jumpy, nervous and panicky from the beginning.I couldn't sleep. I was having horrible nighmares when I did doze off.It NeVeR, EveR stopped!
I finally, called my O.B.and she says to call a Psychiatrist.Okay, no problem I have one of those, you usually do after raising three teenagers, which I have, but more on them later.I make an appointment with Dr.G. she puts me on some medication(an antidepressant) which is suppose to help.It does stop the crippling anxiety but now I feel super charged in a BaD way!I feel like super woman with a killer mean streak!!This goes on for a few months!It does help me with my training ,though.I am able to run my ten to twelve miles a week with no problem.The thing is that I feel awful,mean, angry, disgusted and many more things! I am just horrible,horrible,horrible to my sweet husband!Can we say wicked mad and short tempered??!! I am a totally different person! At first I thought that it would just get better.Really I did.After all giving birth does change your body chemistry and makes your hormones go wacky,right?
Finally, and I do mean finally, after feeling this way for way,way,way too long, I go back to Dr.G. She puts me on a different anti-anxiety medication.I am hopeful. Within a week I start to feel like my former self!!Who knew that was possible?!I continued to feel better and am back to my old self, sort of.LOL!! After having a baby or twins, you never really go back to any form of your old self that you knew and loved or maybe NoT so much love for your self,but onto a different sort of self and in my case a much Better one!I also have to thank GoD here for being with me through all of this and reminding me of his love for me through his word(the bible)because it was just awful!! Kinda like that ride you want to get off of but can't!!You never know how awful you feel till you start feeling better, ya know???
I hope this might help anyone out there who is suffering from post partum anxiety/depression.It is real and please don't be ashamed to talk with you Dr or get some help!After all being the best we can be for ourselves and our family is what really matters
Okay, trying to keep it short.This is my first real post.

My First Job~~ a `SaLad GirL`

It was at a seafood restaurant.I lived in a beach town and was just 15.I wanted to make some money to buy my first car. My brother worked there as a dishwasher so he got me on.He was also my best friend so fun was inevitable!
My title was "SaLad GiRl" LOL!It was a summer job.My job was to make all the stuff that goes on the salad bar and keep it looking nice! Sweet!! It was pretty easy!
The owners of the restaurant were foreigners who didn't care how old you were or how many hours you worked.I was loving that part.They paid you under the table so rock on!I usually went in around 3 in the afternoon and worked until 1 or 2 in the morning.. It was more like a party! My brother, his friends, and everyone was super cool!! The bartender would make us drinks towards the end of the night, every night so, at 15 I thought that was awesome!
My Mom also let us drive her caddillac to work so she wouldn't have to stay up to come get us!How crazy was that?? I can't beleive she did, but we just went along.What else could we do?? We were unlicensed drivers and it was 3 a.m. We did go straight home, though.There was no need to go anywhere else!
So, really my first job was one of favorite jobs!!I was sad to see summer end and have to stop working there!Oh and lets not forget all the money I made!
I just wanted to add that this was way before I knew about being or became a Christian just in case Pastor A. stops by!LOL

Make an on-line slideshow at www.OneTrueMedia.com

Tuesday it's ALL GooD~~

I woke up today glad to be alive for another day!!It was straight up 8:00 a.m. My husband was already gone to work, and my twins were still sleeping! Yes, they almost AlwaYs sleep past 8. I know very lucky.Very, Very Very!! I am trying out writing a little to see what I can come up with. My friend Lani has inspired me to start this blog and has held my hand alot so far.I cannot dissapoint her!!!So, I just put my twins down for their 11:00 nap, which they are starting not to like.I now think about what I can try and get done during naptime and of course I think about RuNNinG and wHen am I going to get to squeeze a run in today???Running is like that.It becomes a sort of addiction!!!Now for those of you new to running or new in a long time do not be discouraged.The affliction will hit you, I promise.It took almost 8 months for me to become like this! LoL!!You know you want to, too!Just jump in somewhere and start.You can start walking first.You just have to start~~~okay gotta go for right now