EILEEN LOO YI ZHEN;
Sunday, August 31, 2008
9:17 AM
hey there sunshine
hey there sunshine
A picture my friend sent me to make me laugh, thank you. Im feeling really cheered up nowadays. I know i hav friends to get me by days, and i know you guys will make me smile. And i know i'll mug but i wont forgo times i should enjoy because of mugging. Afterall, life isnt all about mugging. I'll mug hard, play hard and, i dont know. Bet on it, i'll smile even in any face of fiasco or whatsoever, im going to be real tough =)
Dont know when i'll blog, and i'll really try to make time for blogging. Jiayou to all the muggers out there, and to the poly peeps, enjoy your high lives while they last!
And, P.S. thanks to those who made my day today, you people are great.
goodnight, sweet dreams, and dont let the bedbugs bite.
Its not denial, im just selective of the reality i accept.
Saturday, August 30, 2008
8:25 PM
If you're happy and you know it clap your hands,
If you're happy and you know it clap your hands,
Hello there people! I have something happy to blog about! It's just some photos, and i didnt blog about anything sad hokays! They're all happy stuffs! Daniel's having his BBQ party on the 6th and i told him i'll go, but everything is kinda tentative. Hopefully, i'll go and so will the rest, * winks * And yihao and i have the same phone, * yeah*
Thats all, i have to go and do some vectors tutorial. Leechia finished them already, and now im just sorta reading through vectors, and im already stuck at external division. Sheesh, i need the grace to carry on man.
Sister, cousins, and i. This is the first cousins' photo we've ever taken!
OSLE team spartan, the day we went to wrap the flowers and all.
YAY, i really felt the team spirit that time.
The pretty sunflowers, god, they look so awesome, i so love them.
I swear, if there's gonna be a chance for me to choose which flower i'll be, it'll definitely be the sunflowers! They never fail to brighten me up! =D
Again, the team. This is the emo shot. Some people did the emo pose, and yet they're smiling? Jeez, kinda an irony? Yihao, nicholas, xin yi and i just lowered our heads, lol.
Rasina took this photo for me, it's at the airport.
A happy eileen, yeah girl, a happy me (:
Thats all for today, maybe later, shall go and make funny faces to yuanxin on the webcam and then off to vectors.
VECTORS, HERE I COME! =D
Thats all, i have to go and do some vectors tutorial. Leechia finished them already, and now im just sorta reading through vectors, and im already stuck at external division. Sheesh, i need the grace to carry on man.
Sister, cousins, and i. This is the first cousins' photo we've ever taken!
OSLE team spartan, the day we went to wrap the flowers and all.
YAY, i really felt the team spirit that time.
The pretty sunflowers, god, they look so awesome, i so love them.
I swear, if there's gonna be a chance for me to choose which flower i'll be, it'll definitely be the sunflowers! They never fail to brighten me up! =D
Again, the team. This is the emo shot. Some people did the emo pose, and yet they're smiling? Jeez, kinda an irony? Yihao, nicholas, xin yi and i just lowered our heads, lol.
Rasina took this photo for me, it's at the airport.
A happy eileen, yeah girl, a happy me (:
Thats all for today, maybe later, shall go and make funny faces to yuanxin on the webcam and then off to vectors.
VECTORS, HERE I COME! =D
Friday, August 29, 2008
7:08 PM
Sadness is beautiful loneliness that's tragical
Sadness is beautiful loneliness that's tragical
HELLO!
Long long absence, i know. It's not like me to not blog about every single day of my life, but nahs, recently, its been a real busy and what do you call, yeah, real tired week. This week passed real fast, and i knw the promos is coming, and yes joseph, i'll be keeping a clear mind for the exams. (:
Im not gonna bother about anything, i know friends will be there for me, and my family will egg me on, so i'll try, no, i'll give it my best shot. Like what terrypuppy says, he wants my best in both CCA and exams, i will, i really will.
Teachers' day celebrations at NYJC yesterday, it was alright, some scandal between Mr V and Miss P! They look so compatible as well. I bought a sunflower, and it was so pretty i felt so tempted to keep it for myself, as i absolutely love sunflowers. However, i gave the sunflower to Mr Chee, my maths tutor. To me, he's about the best teacher in NYJC. Happy teachers' day!
Good times dont last long, the day with fellow Damaians, a really nostalgic day. I saw many friends, friends who have changed, and friends who havent. I felt so happy to be able to see Berlisa, she's still the same girl i know, and i saw pei yan, she too, is still the girl i know. We made a pact, we'll do our best for the promos and then we'll meet up again, for FUN.
We ( rasina, gavin, pei yan, berlisa, and i ) lunched at pizza hut yesterday, it was a fun lunch. The guy served our criss cross fries first, and we ate that. Following that, we had our soup, then the pizza. Well, i dont know how we got to that, but gavin suddenly said " where's our criss cross?" We were laughing and after that, i felt so daring, i asked the manager, " uh, may i know where's our criss cross fries?"
Everyone was containing their laughter, even me, we all thought they'll say they'd served our fries, but what astonished us was that they served us another criss cross, and they didnt charge us for that! =D we've got a free plate of fries, yay!
Like i said, good times dont last long, memories last, so, i'll keep this memory in my mind, and i'll move on from wherever i am.
Thank you to all, for always being there.
Love,
eileen loo yi zhen
Long long absence, i know. It's not like me to not blog about every single day of my life, but nahs, recently, its been a real busy and what do you call, yeah, real tired week. This week passed real fast, and i knw the promos is coming, and yes joseph, i'll be keeping a clear mind for the exams. (:
Im not gonna bother about anything, i know friends will be there for me, and my family will egg me on, so i'll try, no, i'll give it my best shot. Like what terrypuppy says, he wants my best in both CCA and exams, i will, i really will.
Teachers' day celebrations at NYJC yesterday, it was alright, some scandal between Mr V and Miss P! They look so compatible as well. I bought a sunflower, and it was so pretty i felt so tempted to keep it for myself, as i absolutely love sunflowers. However, i gave the sunflower to Mr Chee, my maths tutor. To me, he's about the best teacher in NYJC. Happy teachers' day!
Good times dont last long, the day with fellow Damaians, a really nostalgic day. I saw many friends, friends who have changed, and friends who havent. I felt so happy to be able to see Berlisa, she's still the same girl i know, and i saw pei yan, she too, is still the girl i know. We made a pact, we'll do our best for the promos and then we'll meet up again, for FUN.
We ( rasina, gavin, pei yan, berlisa, and i ) lunched at pizza hut yesterday, it was a fun lunch. The guy served our criss cross fries first, and we ate that. Following that, we had our soup, then the pizza. Well, i dont know how we got to that, but gavin suddenly said " where's our criss cross?" We were laughing and after that, i felt so daring, i asked the manager, " uh, may i know where's our criss cross fries?"
Everyone was containing their laughter, even me, we all thought they'll say they'd served our fries, but what astonished us was that they served us another criss cross, and they didnt charge us for that! =D we've got a free plate of fries, yay!
Like i said, good times dont last long, memories last, so, i'll keep this memory in my mind, and i'll move on from wherever i am.
Thank you to all, for always being there.
Love,
eileen loo yi zhen
Sunday, August 24, 2008
6:51 AM
Fly me to the moon, and let me play among the stars
Fly me to the moon, and let me play among the stars
It's drawing nearer and nearer, the promos, i mean. I will definitely study for it, i will, its just a matter of when, and whether will i get to complete the studying before promos come. I am afraid of retaining, i feel like going up to mom and dad,and telling them i wanna drop out. I know they'll say im under too much stress, and eventually, i know they'll allow me to drop out, because they say its my life, whatever i do, they'll support me. But i really dont wanna disappoint them, they went through alot to educate me, and im just waiting to break apart because i cant handle all these studying shit. You know, im really not cut out to be those really mugger and excel people. Im those kinda mugger, and get normal, maybe slightly lower than normal results.
The value i have, that i wrote down on my trading card is " optimism". it is something i will not exchange even in the face of any terrible catastrophe. I feel hypocritical all of a sudden, because i feel like im not optimistic anymore. Zzzz, jieyang's xiao chou yu is really making me very sad.
I say, " i know you'll all miss me when i go to china.."
Dad says, " yeah, definitely."
dad says, " you'll miss my birthday.."
i say, " i know, i'll call you.."
Phonecalls will never replace being there. Despite all the anticipation in going to china, i will miss my family, my home, my warmly xanadu ( sister taught me this word ). Today is a family day, the best i ever had in weeks, months. I love my family, no matter how wacky we are, no matter how we may not be like any other ideal family.
Friends. I really dont know what to say. I dont want to say anything anymore. I will not say anything im unsure of. Silence is the best rhapsody? I dont know. I really dont know. I just wanna say something though, RASINA! YOU'LL ALWAYS BE IN MY HEART OHKAYS! We dont say that to each other girl, but i hope you know that i know you're the best and that i know you know that you care for me too. Sorry, wordplay not intended.
Nanyang Junior College. I dont belong. If someone were to ask me what school im in, i'll say, " damai." Because thats where all the friendships build up, where the love starts, where teachers are teachers and not some shit asses who bring you down with goddamn fucked up words.
Where the love starts, i remember.
Joseph.
I cant deny that fact that i do still think of those days when we were together. A year plus has passed, but it's not gonna erase my memory.
I still remember the incident when i was walking from the bus stop to my house, and i was walking across the carpark when i fell and blood was oozing out from my leg. I remember i called you immediately and cried while telling you about it. I felt so stupid, but then you never failed to make me feel better.
I still remember the much missed times when we'll hang out together during saturday nights, when i'll meet you at bedok reservoir, and we'll lie on the grass and watch the stars, and you, listening to my really stupid nonsensical stuffs about those faraway lights on the other side of the reservoir. When you'll walk me back home, and sometimes, i'll sing the " when the saints go marching in" song as we marched down the reservoir. And a time when we ran back to my house from the reservoir because i had to go home, and we were late, and we just ran all the way, you pulling me because you're a much faster runner than me.
And our first time together at lower seletar reservoir during the first day of chinese new year. We discovered the reservoir by accident, and it was such a beautiful place. And it'll always be. Not a doubt. And tatty's still, on my bed, with me, every single day. And mister blue bear is safely in my cupboard.
I still remember the funny time when we did the class noticeboard together, drawing the many fairytales combined together! Then we got paint all over our hands, then you went into the girls' toilet with me, and washed the paint off my hands. And us wearing similar watches. I still keep the drawings on the noticeboard, and i'll never throw them away. And us walking back to my house, with no umbrellas even though it was raining, and you passing me the gift - the november figurine from precious thots.
And, me, being able to receive your chocolates every month. From cocoa trees. Thank you so much.
You all dont know why im writing all these. Its just me ndulging in reminiscene. You cant blame me. The present life is really too much to handle, and i really prefer to live in the past. Though that is not possible, because everyone moved on, and i cant just, remained in the past no matter how wonderful the ups and downs feel.
I miss every single thing i used to do, i used to have, and i want them back in my life. But thats really not possible, because everything will be just a beautiful memory that i'll always have, and nothing, nothing can replace that memory. Because its you me, and all those who have come and go in that phase of my life.
Eileen, cheer up, you still have your optimism that tomorrow will be a brighter day, ohkays? No matter how tough everything is, dont give up.
=D smile.
Hold on, if you feel like letting go,
hold on, it gets better than you know.
The value i have, that i wrote down on my trading card is " optimism". it is something i will not exchange even in the face of any terrible catastrophe. I feel hypocritical all of a sudden, because i feel like im not optimistic anymore. Zzzz, jieyang's xiao chou yu is really making me very sad.
I say, " i know you'll all miss me when i go to china.."
Dad says, " yeah, definitely."
dad says, " you'll miss my birthday.."
i say, " i know, i'll call you.."
Phonecalls will never replace being there. Despite all the anticipation in going to china, i will miss my family, my home, my warmly xanadu ( sister taught me this word ). Today is a family day, the best i ever had in weeks, months. I love my family, no matter how wacky we are, no matter how we may not be like any other ideal family.
Friends. I really dont know what to say. I dont want to say anything anymore. I will not say anything im unsure of. Silence is the best rhapsody? I dont know. I really dont know. I just wanna say something though, RASINA! YOU'LL ALWAYS BE IN MY HEART OHKAYS! We dont say that to each other girl, but i hope you know that i know you're the best and that i know you know that you care for me too. Sorry, wordplay not intended.
Nanyang Junior College. I dont belong. If someone were to ask me what school im in, i'll say, " damai." Because thats where all the friendships build up, where the love starts, where teachers are teachers and not some shit asses who bring you down with goddamn fucked up words.
Where the love starts, i remember.
Joseph.
I cant deny that fact that i do still think of those days when we were together. A year plus has passed, but it's not gonna erase my memory.
I still remember the incident when i was walking from the bus stop to my house, and i was walking across the carpark when i fell and blood was oozing out from my leg. I remember i called you immediately and cried while telling you about it. I felt so stupid, but then you never failed to make me feel better.
I still remember the much missed times when we'll hang out together during saturday nights, when i'll meet you at bedok reservoir, and we'll lie on the grass and watch the stars, and you, listening to my really stupid nonsensical stuffs about those faraway lights on the other side of the reservoir. When you'll walk me back home, and sometimes, i'll sing the " when the saints go marching in" song as we marched down the reservoir. And a time when we ran back to my house from the reservoir because i had to go home, and we were late, and we just ran all the way, you pulling me because you're a much faster runner than me.
And our first time together at lower seletar reservoir during the first day of chinese new year. We discovered the reservoir by accident, and it was such a beautiful place. And it'll always be. Not a doubt. And tatty's still, on my bed, with me, every single day. And mister blue bear is safely in my cupboard.
I still remember the funny time when we did the class noticeboard together, drawing the many fairytales combined together! Then we got paint all over our hands, then you went into the girls' toilet with me, and washed the paint off my hands. And us wearing similar watches. I still keep the drawings on the noticeboard, and i'll never throw them away. And us walking back to my house, with no umbrellas even though it was raining, and you passing me the gift - the november figurine from precious thots.
And, me, being able to receive your chocolates every month. From cocoa trees. Thank you so much.
You all dont know why im writing all these. Its just me ndulging in reminiscene. You cant blame me. The present life is really too much to handle, and i really prefer to live in the past. Though that is not possible, because everyone moved on, and i cant just, remained in the past no matter how wonderful the ups and downs feel.
I miss every single thing i used to do, i used to have, and i want them back in my life. But thats really not possible, because everything will be just a beautiful memory that i'll always have, and nothing, nothing can replace that memory. Because its you me, and all those who have come and go in that phase of my life.
Eileen, cheer up, you still have your optimism that tomorrow will be a brighter day, ohkays? No matter how tough everything is, dont give up.
=D smile.
Hold on, if you feel like letting go,
hold on, it gets better than you know.
Saturday, August 23, 2008
9:18 PM
我的眼淚留在透明的水裡
我的眼淚留在透明的水裡
I told jieyang xiao chou yu is not a nice song, but hmm, i dont know, i sort of got addicted to it. I am listening to it now, and the mv just kept replaying in my head. i dont really understand all of what the lyrics mean, but now and then i do get it.
YAY! my chinese is improving, i hope i can clear my chinese A levels by this year!
Am eating love letters now, they are just so yummy. I tried to do some maths, but to no avail maybe i'll try some more later, i will be having family day later, yay! It's been such a long time since i went family day-ing with my family, well, it is always forgoed because i always tell me parents i have to do my homework and what not.
Not this time. i'll never forgo family just for studies, because it'll be dumb.
): my bruises have yet to recover, and i thought of many many mellow stuffs just now, i'll blog about them later, i really have to go now, for lunch!
bye journal!
只要你偶爾想起來 我就住在那片海...
YAY! my chinese is improving, i hope i can clear my chinese A levels by this year!
Am eating love letters now, they are just so yummy. I tried to do some maths, but to no avail maybe i'll try some more later, i will be having family day later, yay! It's been such a long time since i went family day-ing with my family, well, it is always forgoed because i always tell me parents i have to do my homework and what not.
Not this time. i'll never forgo family just for studies, because it'll be dumb.
): my bruises have yet to recover, and i thought of many many mellow stuffs just now, i'll blog about them later, i really have to go now, for lunch!
bye journal!
只要你偶爾想起來 我就住在那片海...
7:33 AM
there can be miracles, when you believe.
there can be miracles, when you believe.
Hello journal!
i had magic lesson yesterday, it was alright, though the tricks are getting more and more difficult. We'll be doing street magic next thursday with our buddies, mine is nic and peiyu. Nic is very funny. He taught me some funny things about cards, thanks! And he's got a real nice phone!
We still had to count the money for the flowers after the magic thing, and i only got to go home at around 9 plus. While counting, i admit, i didnt really count, i just drew stuffs on the whiteboard. Things i draw mean something, just that i dont tell people, and they dont really know. To them, its just some plain doodle. To me, the whiteboard is my canvas, a canvas for me to express my own thoughts without anyone actually knowing anything.
I went for OSLE early in the morning too, i overslept. I slept on the bus, almost missed the school's stop. I feel pretty bad, because i actually didnt have the urgency, i didnt even rush. i just drank yakult, listened to songs and slowly walked to the room. When i went in, miss darrell's face seemed kinda ' black' , scared me for a second. As usual, i couldnt absorb much things, i was barely awake, and the room was freezing cold. After the whole thing, we still had to count money, everytime count money, couting the money that is not mine at all, haha. Well, first time i had a conversation with Yizhe, woah, he is so good at sit ups, broke the school's record, he did 75 in a minute! But our conversation was quite lame and funny, he is lame.
I went home, slept in the bus, and again, woke up at my stop, rushed down the bus, im glad i didnt fall. I reached home and slept again. I woke up at around 9 plus. I am feeling so sick, " im here without you baby, but you're still on my lonely mind, im here without you baby, but you're still with me in my dreams..." okay, sorry, was singing.
Everyday is sucha cold cold day. I think i will go and sleep. My head really hurts alot.
The blue blacks at my waist and shoulder blade has yet to disappear, and they still hurt. Its alright, it'll heal.
I watched the fireworks just now, today is the annual fireworks festival! I didnt get to go there, but i could see the displa from my house. It was awesome. The fireworks really caught my breath. Mom and sister were gushing about how pretty they were, but i just stood with them and stared into the sky. Seriously, i think my symbol is the fireworks. They dont last not at all, but they do make an impact on people's life. Because while watching the display, i was awed by the beauty of it, and how they really made me smile.
Watching the fireworks with people you adore, like friends family, and even the whole of pugi, really, some things can warm your heart even in the coldest days. Fireworks warmed mine.
I look forward to the end of promos, and to the going of china. I got to have something to look forward to, so that it'll deceive me into telling myself that i do have a goal in life, no matter how short term it is.
Quoting from ben: A smile may not end the rain, but crying will only blur your vision.
I must be optimistic.
i had magic lesson yesterday, it was alright, though the tricks are getting more and more difficult. We'll be doing street magic next thursday with our buddies, mine is nic and peiyu. Nic is very funny. He taught me some funny things about cards, thanks! And he's got a real nice phone!
We still had to count the money for the flowers after the magic thing, and i only got to go home at around 9 plus. While counting, i admit, i didnt really count, i just drew stuffs on the whiteboard. Things i draw mean something, just that i dont tell people, and they dont really know. To them, its just some plain doodle. To me, the whiteboard is my canvas, a canvas for me to express my own thoughts without anyone actually knowing anything.
I went for OSLE early in the morning too, i overslept. I slept on the bus, almost missed the school's stop. I feel pretty bad, because i actually didnt have the urgency, i didnt even rush. i just drank yakult, listened to songs and slowly walked to the room. When i went in, miss darrell's face seemed kinda ' black' , scared me for a second. As usual, i couldnt absorb much things, i was barely awake, and the room was freezing cold. After the whole thing, we still had to count money, everytime count money, couting the money that is not mine at all, haha. Well, first time i had a conversation with Yizhe, woah, he is so good at sit ups, broke the school's record, he did 75 in a minute! But our conversation was quite lame and funny, he is lame.
I went home, slept in the bus, and again, woke up at my stop, rushed down the bus, im glad i didnt fall. I reached home and slept again. I woke up at around 9 plus. I am feeling so sick, " im here without you baby, but you're still on my lonely mind, im here without you baby, but you're still with me in my dreams..." okay, sorry, was singing.
Everyday is sucha cold cold day. I think i will go and sleep. My head really hurts alot.
The blue blacks at my waist and shoulder blade has yet to disappear, and they still hurt. Its alright, it'll heal.
I watched the fireworks just now, today is the annual fireworks festival! I didnt get to go there, but i could see the displa from my house. It was awesome. The fireworks really caught my breath. Mom and sister were gushing about how pretty they were, but i just stood with them and stared into the sky. Seriously, i think my symbol is the fireworks. They dont last not at all, but they do make an impact on people's life. Because while watching the display, i was awed by the beauty of it, and how they really made me smile.
Watching the fireworks with people you adore, like friends family, and even the whole of pugi, really, some things can warm your heart even in the coldest days. Fireworks warmed mine.
I look forward to the end of promos, and to the going of china. I got to have something to look forward to, so that it'll deceive me into telling myself that i do have a goal in life, no matter how short term it is.
Quoting from ben: A smile may not end the rain, but crying will only blur your vision.
I must be optimistic.
7:24 AM
Was it too much aggravation?
Was it too much aggravation?
you tell me the way i wont see,
then i changed my mind you disagree
.
Rasina , we'll walk each other through everything.
Thursday, August 21, 2008
10:30 AM
big big girl in a big big world
big big girl in a big big world
MSTERS all like to hang out at the benches near the tennis courts. For piano yuanshin, she likes it because she is able to lean against the pillars, lazy girl. I like it there because it is always damn sunny, and warm. And i'll always tell them, its so wen nuan!
I feel kinda angry with myself, because nowadays i suffer from gastric in school almost every single day. I feel as though i didnt take care of myself properly by not eating well. In school, i eat only apples, no, im not gonna be another newton, but, i cant find anything i wanna eat in school. And when i get home? sometimes i miss dinner as well, and i dont even feel hungry! i only feel those gastric pangs thingy. Piano scolds me everytime i dont eat, but seriously, i really cant find anything i really wanna eat..
I hurt myself, not deliberately. Its during pugi training. I did bridges, im quite good at them, so, we had to do bridging from the standing position, and then bend down slowly, and hold it there till jiaolian says you can get up. So, yeah, i was doing, mdm tan was there and she pushed my hands, i was in the bridging position and i was holding that position, when she told me to try to move my hands closer to my feet, so she used her feet to shove me forward, and i toppled, and crashed to the ground. i was alright, but little did i know i've got this huge bruise at my waist, and somewhere near my shoulder blades. Piano said there's a sort of black bruise at my shoulder blade, it kinda hurts when i bend or run. Pugi attendence was awesome yesterday, full attendence! Oh, we did the board.
I went home, missed dinner, and was studying for chem SPA skill D when i fell asleep. Mom woke me up at 5, and i studied for skill D, and went to school. Im really grateful to jieyang for lending me his J1 chem electrochemistry notes, because i didnt print and i wasnt able to print in the morning cuz everyone will be hogging the photocopy shop. And i found his notes more, easy to understand, i felt so happy, lol. He says he can lend me all his J1 notes, but one at a time, thank you jieyang!
Since he is so nice, i shall go and watch the xiao chou yu ( clownfish ) mv that he says is damn touching and all. hehs.
Theres something i hate about nyjc. its about this XXX who always go " morning colleagues.." i think he is hypocritical, i dont like it, at all. anyway, lets not discuss it here.
I got back the biology test i spent so much time mugging for. I cant say my results is bad, but the thing is, i felt pretty disappointed, i thought i could do better ):
28/40. nevermind eileen, you shall work harder.
Today, during common lunch break, Sherlyn, gena and i went around the canteen selling stuffs, while the others stayed at the connect and contact point to sell the stuffs as well. i was very touched when the people i approached, especially the J2 pugilistic seniors who donated to the tinbox graciously, thank you (:
woah, it is like, such a long time since my blogging resumed to long posts, hmmm, that should be a happy thing. Rasina, i miss you!
Letting go is not actually the hardest thing to do, i think i dont know, hmmm, nevermind.
This part of the lyrics is actually the best part of the song i love,
"And it's okay if you have go away
Oh just remember the telephone works both ways
But if I never ever hear them ring
If nothing else I'll think the bells inside
Have finally found you someone else and that's okay
Cause I'll remember everything you sang"
i will.
you gotta understand the lyrics in order to appreciate the song, or the meaning it wanna bring across. this part of the song holds a special meaning to me.
its 210 right now, there's school tomorrow, i should go and sleep, eileen, go!!
i hope my PW will be better tomorrow!
There is the projectsmile, learning of magic tomorrow, i dont like magic.
Stupid right? since many people are so interested in them and all. but, i just dont see the point of magic, its just deception, you're just fooling people, isnt it?
I feel kinda angry with myself, because nowadays i suffer from gastric in school almost every single day. I feel as though i didnt take care of myself properly by not eating well. In school, i eat only apples, no, im not gonna be another newton, but, i cant find anything i wanna eat in school. And when i get home? sometimes i miss dinner as well, and i dont even feel hungry! i only feel those gastric pangs thingy. Piano scolds me everytime i dont eat, but seriously, i really cant find anything i really wanna eat..
I hurt myself, not deliberately. Its during pugi training. I did bridges, im quite good at them, so, we had to do bridging from the standing position, and then bend down slowly, and hold it there till jiaolian says you can get up. So, yeah, i was doing, mdm tan was there and she pushed my hands, i was in the bridging position and i was holding that position, when she told me to try to move my hands closer to my feet, so she used her feet to shove me forward, and i toppled, and crashed to the ground. i was alright, but little did i know i've got this huge bruise at my waist, and somewhere near my shoulder blades. Piano said there's a sort of black bruise at my shoulder blade, it kinda hurts when i bend or run. Pugi attendence was awesome yesterday, full attendence! Oh, we did the board.
I went home, missed dinner, and was studying for chem SPA skill D when i fell asleep. Mom woke me up at 5, and i studied for skill D, and went to school. Im really grateful to jieyang for lending me his J1 chem electrochemistry notes, because i didnt print and i wasnt able to print in the morning cuz everyone will be hogging the photocopy shop. And i found his notes more, easy to understand, i felt so happy, lol. He says he can lend me all his J1 notes, but one at a time, thank you jieyang!
Since he is so nice, i shall go and watch the xiao chou yu ( clownfish ) mv that he says is damn touching and all. hehs.
Theres something i hate about nyjc. its about this XXX who always go " morning colleagues.." i think he is hypocritical, i dont like it, at all. anyway, lets not discuss it here.
I got back the biology test i spent so much time mugging for. I cant say my results is bad, but the thing is, i felt pretty disappointed, i thought i could do better ):
28/40. nevermind eileen, you shall work harder.
Today, during common lunch break, Sherlyn, gena and i went around the canteen selling stuffs, while the others stayed at the connect and contact point to sell the stuffs as well. i was very touched when the people i approached, especially the J2 pugilistic seniors who donated to the tinbox graciously, thank you (:
woah, it is like, such a long time since my blogging resumed to long posts, hmmm, that should be a happy thing. Rasina, i miss you!
Letting go is not actually the hardest thing to do, i think i dont know, hmmm, nevermind.
This part of the lyrics is actually the best part of the song i love,
"And it's okay if you have go away
Oh just remember the telephone works both ways
But if I never ever hear them ring
If nothing else I'll think the bells inside
Have finally found you someone else and that's okay
Cause I'll remember everything you sang"
i will.
you gotta understand the lyrics in order to appreciate the song, or the meaning it wanna bring across. this part of the song holds a special meaning to me.
its 210 right now, there's school tomorrow, i should go and sleep, eileen, go!!
i hope my PW will be better tomorrow!
There is the projectsmile, learning of magic tomorrow, i dont like magic.
Stupid right? since many people are so interested in them and all. but, i just dont see the point of magic, its just deception, you're just fooling people, isnt it?
Tuesday, August 19, 2008
8:58 AM
Melting under blue skies shouting out sunlight shimmering love
Melting under blue skies shouting out sunlight shimmering love
Im so tired right now, but no, im trying to psycho myself and tell myself that i am not tired. Im doing research for PW, and its 12 now. Today is a really tiring day, because i was ill. I caught a slight fever, from walking in the rain yesterday, and i reached school today, and slept all the way till morning assembly started.
Was quite frustrated and angry when i heard about what happened during the inter class competition for basketball, but i shant elaborate since it is over.
Im like typing and trying now to shut my eyes, it'll be sure a miracle that this post hasnt got any spelling mistake.
Research is on heels, god, how much damage they cause to the feet and all. Im feeling envious of those women who are able to wear them and walk in them normally. I cant wear heels for nuts, because i just cant walk in them.
I dont like the feeling of not being able to run freely in heels and all, maybe im really a guy in nature huh.
Okay, shall get back to PW, and yuanshin, im so sad! ( makes happy face )
hahahahahas.
Oh yeah, we got our tee! =D
Goodnight/ goodmorning.
Was quite frustrated and angry when i heard about what happened during the inter class competition for basketball, but i shant elaborate since it is over.
Im like typing and trying now to shut my eyes, it'll be sure a miracle that this post hasnt got any spelling mistake.
Research is on heels, god, how much damage they cause to the feet and all. Im feeling envious of those women who are able to wear them and walk in them normally. I cant wear heels for nuts, because i just cant walk in them.
I dont like the feeling of not being able to run freely in heels and all, maybe im really a guy in nature huh.
Okay, shall get back to PW, and yuanshin, im so sad! ( makes happy face )
hahahahahas.
Oh yeah, we got our tee! =D
Goodnight/ goodmorning.
Monday, August 18, 2008
8:09 AM
You will, when you believe.
You will, when you believe.
These past two weeks, to me, have been a mega flop. Firstly, it is my PW. My group was yelled at by this PW maniac, who said we didnt even put in any ounce of effort. I was so pissed, i retorted. Since young, my dad always teaches me that i have to stand up for my own rights, and right any wrongs that people have of you. Even when the whole world ceases to believe in you, my dad says that, i still have to be firm in my belief, if not, i'll be a mega hypocritical loser, because i cant even try to defend myself.
So, i retorted, because i did put in effort for PW, and i can say that i did give my best efforts, even though, the PW was a flop, i know i tried. I am not angry or what that it is a flop, im just in this state of anguish because that guy said we didnt put in effort. I know we have.
Today, during PW, two of my group members quarreled. Initially, at the start of PW, i didnt talk, because i was feeling darn left out since i couldnt attend saturday's meeting, and nobody bothered to fill me in on anything, so i shut up because i really hadnt got a clue on whatever we were planning to do. At long last, kind marven filled me in on what we're gonna do, and suddenly, i realised, hey, this project seems to be going in a funny direction. i cant quite put my finger as to why the ideas seem funny, so i kept quiet, until anna and yemin started to quarrel. Marven and i didnt know what to do, we wont take sides, we told ourselves, because taking sides would alleviate the state of argument and animosity between the two. We tried to discuss the project further, but seriously, two people seriously cannot decide everything. Thanks Marven, for telling me all those PW stuffs. I heard that Anna cried too, gosh, i dont really know what to do, but i know that if the group falls, i'll still be thee standing to complete the project, i really hope i can. And i go on thinking, where the f* has my last member gone off to? YEE Z-WIN. god.
I just wanna tell my group, that hey, people, yeah, our project is a flop, but its just till now . I believe that as long as we put in efforts, and stay united, nothing can go wrong. Turn the negative energy into positive energy, because when you feel that things seem to fail, you'll know that you're not alone, there are still others, your PW mates who'll be there to work hand in hand with you. Sure, everyone of us have our own perceptions, our own ideologies, so we really gotta listen to everyone. Lets not insist on doing things our ways, because others may have a brighter idea than yours!
I tell my PW mates, " i believe in sunshine after the rain," and that, " hey, there may even be a rainbow too,"
Who knows? we just gotta give it our best, because winners never quit.
So, i retorted, because i did put in effort for PW, and i can say that i did give my best efforts, even though, the PW was a flop, i know i tried. I am not angry or what that it is a flop, im just in this state of anguish because that guy said we didnt put in effort. I know we have.
Today, during PW, two of my group members quarreled. Initially, at the start of PW, i didnt talk, because i was feeling darn left out since i couldnt attend saturday's meeting, and nobody bothered to fill me in on anything, so i shut up because i really hadnt got a clue on whatever we were planning to do. At long last, kind marven filled me in on what we're gonna do, and suddenly, i realised, hey, this project seems to be going in a funny direction. i cant quite put my finger as to why the ideas seem funny, so i kept quiet, until anna and yemin started to quarrel. Marven and i didnt know what to do, we wont take sides, we told ourselves, because taking sides would alleviate the state of argument and animosity between the two. We tried to discuss the project further, but seriously, two people seriously cannot decide everything. Thanks Marven, for telling me all those PW stuffs. I heard that Anna cried too, gosh, i dont really know what to do, but i know that if the group falls, i'll still be thee standing to complete the project, i really hope i can. And i go on thinking, where the f* has my last member gone off to? YEE Z-WIN. god.
I just wanna tell my group, that hey, people, yeah, our project is a flop, but its just till now . I believe that as long as we put in efforts, and stay united, nothing can go wrong. Turn the negative energy into positive energy, because when you feel that things seem to fail, you'll know that you're not alone, there are still others, your PW mates who'll be there to work hand in hand with you. Sure, everyone of us have our own perceptions, our own ideologies, so we really gotta listen to everyone. Lets not insist on doing things our ways, because others may have a brighter idea than yours!
I tell my PW mates, " i believe in sunshine after the rain," and that, " hey, there may even be a rainbow too,"
Who knows? we just gotta give it our best, because winners never quit.
**********
im feeling so ill now because i hadnt brought a brolly to school, and the skies rained on me while i was making my way home. My head feels so heavy, and i still have to do my EOM. I just sent ellene the photos for pugilistic board, and i really feel like sleeping. NO!!! EILEEN! YOU SHALL NOT SLEEP!
Thanks parents, because you all love me. i love you all, too =D
Sunday, August 17, 2008
10:21 AM
we sing, we dance, we steal things
we sing, we dance, we steal things
WHEES.
dont infer too much.
Person A says my WHEES stands for:
Wow, how eccentric, eileen smiles.
Person B says my WHEES stands for:
Well, hope eeky eileen smiles.
Actually why dont you guys not read too much into my words, haha, because all i mean was,
WHEES, im happy.
Shit, i lost my PE shorts, just borrowed from ellene! Thanks, you're a lifesaver! It's 130 now, and i really should go to bed.
I also hope my sister and her ex boyfriend, my kor, will be happy again.
Seriously, everything takes two hands to clap. JIAYOU people!
=D
dont infer too much.
Person A says my WHEES stands for:
Wow, how eccentric, eileen smiles.
Person B says my WHEES stands for:
Well, hope eeky eileen smiles.
Actually why dont you guys not read too much into my words, haha, because all i mean was,
WHEES, im happy.
Shit, i lost my PE shorts, just borrowed from ellene! Thanks, you're a lifesaver! It's 130 now, and i really should go to bed.
I also hope my sister and her ex boyfriend, my kor, will be happy again.
Seriously, everything takes two hands to clap. JIAYOU people!
=D
8:00 AM
Dont mean nothing, im always getting over you.
Dont mean nothing, im always getting over you.
Listen to this:
This song brightened up my day loads.
My sister says, why listen to those sad songs that make you pity yourself and all, because we dont really need all that. And as i listened to this song, even though most parts of it i dont really understand, this song is so sweet, i feel so happy.
Im crunching on an apple now; these few weeks have been rather fruity weeks,and im wondering why my apple's turning yellow, is it because it is corroded by air? No clue.
So, listen to the song, it made my day, so im sure it'll make yours too! =D
P.S. Reminder to self, huiting's birthday is 19th August, remember, eileen!
Hehs, goodnight people!
oh yeah, yuanshin, sher and i said we'll pon tmr's PE if it is gonna be massdance. I rather go and run or what then waste my time doing all those dances. Bleah.
This song brightened up my day loads.
My sister says, why listen to those sad songs that make you pity yourself and all, because we dont really need all that. And as i listened to this song, even though most parts of it i dont really understand, this song is so sweet, i feel so happy.
Im crunching on an apple now; these few weeks have been rather fruity weeks,and im wondering why my apple's turning yellow, is it because it is corroded by air? No clue.
So, listen to the song, it made my day, so im sure it'll make yours too! =D
P.S. Reminder to self, huiting's birthday is 19th August, remember, eileen!
Hehs, goodnight people!
oh yeah, yuanshin, sher and i said we'll pon tmr's PE if it is gonna be massdance. I rather go and run or what then waste my time doing all those dances. Bleah.
Labels: you used to be my inspiration
Saturday, August 16, 2008
6:55 AM
im here without you baby, but you're still on my lonely mind
im here without you baby, but you're still on my lonely mind
fine. update right? fine. type normally, fine then.
I have many many things that happened, but now it just seemed as though they are mundane. I dont know what to do, i feel lost alright. Im so frustrated. I dont know what happened, i want to know what happened. What create this distance? What happened? It is really the most tiring thing to do, when something happened, and all you wanna do is to try to find the answer as to why it turned out like this. Do you know the anguish i feel? No, you dont at all. Dont say you know, you wont. you never will. all i demand is really, why? from being so close to totally being nothing at all. I feel so damn tired already, and today, as i lie down on my mom's bed and tried to catch a nap, i woke up with so much a startle, and i looked around me, and said, " XX, where are you?" You may think it is ridiculous, maybe , really. You said i was your inspiration, your motivation. Now you dont need all these anymore. Everything i try, futile. You think, i deserve this right? I took you for granted, didnt cherish your presence. Are you sure? Have you ever asked me? Did you even give me a chance? I admit, this selfish part of me, just want to keep you here with me forever. You said so, you said you'll be there, and i thought you meant forever. Now you turned on your heels and walked away. When things crumble, how i want to run to you and grumble about it. Im so drained. And i occupy myself, just guessing what really went wrong. Maybe i really dont need to, because you dont even care. This is really not the appropriate time to bring this up, but you know, you were my motivation, my inspiration to keep going tough. I realise myself falling apart now. And the sad thing, i really dont care enough to pick myself up from where i fell. Pathetic.
The worst thing? That line between X and X is blurred. I thought i know how i feel already. But it doesnt really matter now huh. You're gone.
I have many many things that happened, but now it just seemed as though they are mundane. I dont know what to do, i feel lost alright. Im so frustrated. I dont know what happened, i want to know what happened. What create this distance? What happened? It is really the most tiring thing to do, when something happened, and all you wanna do is to try to find the answer as to why it turned out like this. Do you know the anguish i feel? No, you dont at all. Dont say you know, you wont. you never will. all i demand is really, why? from being so close to totally being nothing at all. I feel so damn tired already, and today, as i lie down on my mom's bed and tried to catch a nap, i woke up with so much a startle, and i looked around me, and said, " XX, where are you?" You may think it is ridiculous, maybe , really. You said i was your inspiration, your motivation. Now you dont need all these anymore. Everything i try, futile. You think, i deserve this right? I took you for granted, didnt cherish your presence. Are you sure? Have you ever asked me? Did you even give me a chance? I admit, this selfish part of me, just want to keep you here with me forever. You said so, you said you'll be there, and i thought you meant forever. Now you turned on your heels and walked away. When things crumble, how i want to run to you and grumble about it. Im so drained. And i occupy myself, just guessing what really went wrong. Maybe i really dont need to, because you dont even care. This is really not the appropriate time to bring this up, but you know, you were my motivation, my inspiration to keep going tough. I realise myself falling apart now. And the sad thing, i really dont care enough to pick myself up from where i fell. Pathetic.
The worst thing? That line between X and X is blurred. I thought i know how i feel already. But it doesnt really matter now huh. You're gone.
thanks to YX piano for doing a survey on me on her blog.
Sighs.
Labels: As the people leave their way to say hello
Thursday, August 14, 2008
7:08 AM
too close for comfort
too close for comfort
Thou shalt not explore thou's thoughts.
O great Lord, if thou could use the riches of the seas and buy You into disclosing thy's thoughts, thou wil't do it with much haste. Otherwise, thou shal't wallow in knee length lemon juice of misery, consumed by the undulating waves of the yellow sea.
It doesnt matter if none of you understand anyway, its written in old literature format, but then again, none of you really have to know.
Goodnight people.
O great Lord, if thou could use the riches of the seas and buy You into disclosing thy's thoughts, thou wil't do it with much haste. Otherwise, thou shal't wallow in knee length lemon juice of misery, consumed by the undulating waves of the yellow sea.
It doesnt matter if none of you understand anyway, its written in old literature format, but then again, none of you really have to know.
Goodnight people.
Tuesday, August 12, 2008
7:48 AM
And often those words get tangled up in lines,
And often those words get tangled up in lines,
Terrible Hangover.
Thou shall not speak.
Thou shall not speak.
Monday, August 11, 2008
8:56 AM
Hug a tree
Hug a tree
Friends, im okay.
Sister - dont keep everything to yourself! if you have anything unhappy, tell me okays! Dont be too sad over the break up as well! we'll live. (:
Woke up at 7 plus and met Rasina at changi airport to practice maths. We sat at the viewing gallery and studied, chatted, ate, laughed, talked about planes. Thanks for being with me today my best friend! I hope you'll go and see the planes again with me!
Had those seventh month dinners. Drank beer. I am not drunk. no i am not drunk. Piano says i should bring beer and share it with her tmr ( quoted from Carlsberg : hao you man tian xia ) thanks girl.
I feel myself sinking deeper into what i told myself, exactly what i told myself never to be.
I told myself i'll never be an alcoholic.
Yet, i drank.
Beer seriously makes me feel... good.
I dont know anything anymore.
Beer is my boyfriend. goodnight.
Sister - dont keep everything to yourself! if you have anything unhappy, tell me okays! Dont be too sad over the break up as well! we'll live. (:
Woke up at 7 plus and met Rasina at changi airport to practice maths. We sat at the viewing gallery and studied, chatted, ate, laughed, talked about planes. Thanks for being with me today my best friend! I hope you'll go and see the planes again with me!
Had those seventh month dinners. Drank beer. I am not drunk. no i am not drunk. Piano says i should bring beer and share it with her tmr ( quoted from Carlsberg : hao you man tian xia ) thanks girl.
I feel myself sinking deeper into what i told myself, exactly what i told myself never to be.
I told myself i'll never be an alcoholic.
Yet, i drank.
Beer seriously makes me feel... good.
I dont know anything anymore.
Beer is my boyfriend. goodnight.
Saturday, August 9, 2008
11:44 PM
throw it away , forget yesterday
throw it away , forget yesterday
Guests came over, i dont like to entertain any guests, especially not when im in a mood like this, i rather hide under my duvet, curl into a ball and sleep.
Visha sent me an sms.
" Dear Lord, the lady reading this is beautiful, classy, strong and i care about her. Help her live her life to the fullest. Please promote her and cause her to excel above her expectations. Help her to shine in the darkest places and love where it is impossible to love. Cheer up Eileen! (: "
Thank you. standing on the corridor leading to my house i thought about how it'd feel like to plunge down from the 13th storey. No, not suicidal, no worries. I just wanna try something thrilling.
4:14 AM
Im finally out of words
Im finally out of words
LYRICS
Was it you who spoke the words that things would happen but not to me?
Oh things are gonna happen naturally
Oh and taking your advice and I'm looking on the bright side
And balancing the whole thing
Oh but at often times those words get tangled up in lines
And the bright light turns to night
Oh until the dawn it brings
another day to sing about the magic that was you and me
Cause you and I both loved
What you and I spoke of
And others just read of
Others only read up of the love
oh the love that I love
See I'm all about them words
Over numbers, unencumbered numbered words
Hundreds of pages, pages, pages, for words
More words then I had ever heard
and I feel so alive
Cause you and I both loved
What you and I spoke of
And others just read of
And if you could see me now
Oh love,love,
you and I, you and I,
Not so little you and I anymore
And with this silence brings a moral story
more importantly evolving, is the glory of a boy
Cause you and I both loved
what you and I spoke of
and others just read of and if you could see now
well then I'm almost finally out of, finally, out of, finally,
well Im almost finally, finally, well I am free, Oh Im free
And it's okay if you had go away
Oh just remember the telephones well they workin' in both ways
but if I never, ever hear them ring
if nothing else I'll think the bells inside
have finally found you someone else and that's okay
cause I'll remember everything you sang
Cuz you and I both loved what you and I spoke of
and others just read of and if you could see me now
well then I'm almost finally out of, finally out of
Finally de dedededede, well Im almost finally out of words.
2:41 AM
When it all amounts to nothing in the end
When it all amounts to nothing in the end
*****
Sunflowers make me so happy every single time i look at them. Call me strange since girls usually prefer roses over sunflowers, but i think roses are plain. Sunflowers have the yellow and brown in them that reminds me of the Earth as well as the rays of the sun. I so love them. OSLE Yunnan team is going to sell sunflowers and roses for some teachers' day thingy, i hope i'll be able to get them too.
*******
Babies.
Today, dad, mom and i went shopping for gifts for a baby ( first month ). The stuffs there are so cute, babies' stuffs are cute, and really adorable. Im gonna have loadsa babies when i grow up, maybe adopting too. I imagine myself as a mother of tens of babies, and no husband. And those babies come from all over the world, adopted, makes me seem really like angelina jolie, but heck.
happy birthday singapore, it is raining now.
Friday, August 8, 2008
9:55 AM
Sometimes you wonder if this fight is worthwhile,
Sometimes you wonder if this fight is worthwhile,
Monday
- School as usual, CCA as usual, tired as usual.
- Missed lunch, missed dinner,
- Slept the moment i reached home.
Tuesday
- PE test, sure gonna flunk it damn badly,
- Truthfully couldnt be bothered, dont give a fk.
- Went with Pugi jiaolian and his colourful lorry to places for performances, met with the usual " ah beng" pugi outlook,was an eye opener.
- Fell asleep the moment i came home.
- Missed lunch and dinner.
Wednesday
- Nothing much, normal school and all.
- CCA and night study, did equilibrium tutorial.
- Missed lunch and dinner ( i told sher i ate at home, actually i didnt i had like two mouthfuls of rice, and thats about it. )
- Had a tiff with family, cried.
- Nobody.
Thursday
- School
- Reached home at 5, slept at 530 pm till next morning 530.
- Missed lunch and dinner.
Friday
- National Day Celebration, wore red.
- Had lunch with friends.
- OSLE first time at learning magic, was fun, though i really do not believe in magic because it is, afterall, tricks, and tricks are deceptions.
- Fund raising group went to Ikea, everyone was bushed. ended at 730 p.m.
- Ran to meet family for movie - money no enough. Touching.
- Home. Missed dinner.
I skipped so many meals, i practically survived on fruits, and cookies bought for me during night study by dear friends. Oh, juices too. I cant keep up with all these anymore.
Im tired.
P.S. a telephone works both ways, its an analogy, i cant keep it going with one way communication. And maybe i dont even have to, most definitely i wouldnt have to anymore, you've already got someone, your girlfriend i s'posed, to talk to, a new cosmo partner. You can leave out all the rest. Leave the phone dangling, its okay.
Thanks to msters friends, yuanxin, sherlyn, lee chia and visha who told me to take care. Surprisingly, even Yemin aka burmese. And daniel. Thank you people.
by the way, i watched the stars tonight, as i stood by the window and just stared out blankly. There werent much stars, but for some reason, i could see so many shining their brightest, probably, they are really not there, probably just a figment of my imagination. But they are truly beautiful.
- School as usual, CCA as usual, tired as usual.
- Missed lunch, missed dinner,
- Slept the moment i reached home.
Tuesday
- PE test, sure gonna flunk it damn badly,
- Truthfully couldnt be bothered, dont give a fk.
- Went with Pugi jiaolian and his colourful lorry to places for performances, met with the usual " ah beng" pugi outlook,was an eye opener.
- Fell asleep the moment i came home.
- Missed lunch and dinner.
Wednesday
- Nothing much, normal school and all.
- CCA and night study, did equilibrium tutorial.
- Missed lunch and dinner ( i told sher i ate at home, actually i didnt i had like two mouthfuls of rice, and thats about it. )
- Had a tiff with family, cried.
- Nobody.
Thursday
- School
- Reached home at 5, slept at 530 pm till next morning 530.
- Missed lunch and dinner.
Friday
- National Day Celebration, wore red.
- Had lunch with friends.
- OSLE first time at learning magic, was fun, though i really do not believe in magic because it is, afterall, tricks, and tricks are deceptions.
- Fund raising group went to Ikea, everyone was bushed. ended at 730 p.m.
- Ran to meet family for movie - money no enough. Touching.
- Home. Missed dinner.
I skipped so many meals, i practically survived on fruits, and cookies bought for me during night study by dear friends. Oh, juices too. I cant keep up with all these anymore.
Im tired.
P.S. a telephone works both ways, its an analogy, i cant keep it going with one way communication. And maybe i dont even have to, most definitely i wouldnt have to anymore, you've already got someone, your girlfriend i s'posed, to talk to, a new cosmo partner. You can leave out all the rest. Leave the phone dangling, its okay.
Thanks to msters friends, yuanxin, sherlyn, lee chia and visha who told me to take care. Surprisingly, even Yemin aka burmese. And daniel. Thank you people.
by the way, i watched the stars tonight, as i stood by the window and just stared out blankly. There werent much stars, but for some reason, i could see so many shining their brightest, probably, they are really not there, probably just a figment of my imagination. But they are truly beautiful.
Labels: wont you watch it with me?
Tuesday, August 5, 2008
5:49 AM
We share the same sky.
We share the same sky.
There used to be this cloud in my life, it came as abruptly as it left. It comforted me when i was at my weakest, made me laugh when i was at my saddest, and told me im not stupid at my ugliest.
I was at my weakest then. This cloud came, and i shot it with angsty questions, which it replied with, almost always a " well..." , and offered me many philosophies, along with it's really cute fake caucasian slang.
This cloud has left. Probably, left me for someone else it can cheer up, for someone else who'll appreciate it more than i do, for someone else who's at their weakest too?
Recently, something happened to this cloud, and it didnt tell me anything about it. I was, in fact, the last to know. And even so, it wasnt the one who told me. I knew it from the others. Yes, i am hurt.
But, i'll wish this cloud all the best too, in wherever skies it has taken off to,
I was at my weakest then. This cloud came, and i shot it with angsty questions, which it replied with, almost always a " well..." , and offered me many philosophies, along with it's really cute fake caucasian slang.
This cloud has left. Probably, left me for someone else it can cheer up, for someone else who'll appreciate it more than i do, for someone else who's at their weakest too?
Recently, something happened to this cloud, and it didnt tell me anything about it. I was, in fact, the last to know. And even so, it wasnt the one who told me. I knew it from the others. Yes, i am hurt.
But, i'll wish this cloud all the best too, in wherever skies it has taken off to,
Labels: where'd you go? \ i miss you so.
Monday, August 4, 2008
6:41 PM
Face unafraid of the plans that we make,
Face unafraid of the plans that we make,
Im now in the school's computer lab, no, im not usually the type to go to school labs and blog, but i really have this goddamn urge to blog. About nothing?
Not sure either.
Im feeling really happy now, ( probably due to monthly mood swings ), but then again, its likely because Mr Wang ( the replacement chinese teacher ) granted my request of listening to Qi Li Xiang on youtube during chinese lessons. I really love that song, i used to not know the meaning until recently, when i read the lyrics off a website line by line, yeah, it is really nice.
Had night study till 9 plus yesterday, and reached home close to 1030. Felt really exhausted, burnt out
And maybe, just maybe, if i could push these bugging doubts outta my mind, probably, i'll be able to you know, live happily, just like how i used to be. Because i wanna live like i know what im living for.
Thanks to daniel who got me jellybeans yesterday, it was a surprise, thanks, i really didnt know you'd, and i'll gladly pay you for it if, you know, if you'd just take my money.
There's a CCA outing later, im pretty sure it'll be a darn good exposure for me, to things like these.
Have a nice day.
P.S. Recognise a sarcasm when you see one..
Not sure either.
Im feeling really happy now, ( probably due to monthly mood swings ), but then again, its likely because Mr Wang ( the replacement chinese teacher ) granted my request of listening to Qi Li Xiang on youtube during chinese lessons. I really love that song, i used to not know the meaning until recently, when i read the lyrics off a website line by line, yeah, it is really nice.
Had night study till 9 plus yesterday, and reached home close to 1030. Felt really exhausted, burnt out
And maybe, just maybe, if i could push these bugging doubts outta my mind, probably, i'll be able to you know, live happily, just like how i used to be. Because i wanna live like i know what im living for.
Thanks to daniel who got me jellybeans yesterday, it was a surprise, thanks, i really didnt know you'd, and i'll gladly pay you for it if, you know, if you'd just take my money.
There's a CCA outing later, im pretty sure it'll be a darn good exposure for me, to things like these.
Have a nice day.
P.S. Recognise a sarcasm when you see one..
Saturday, August 2, 2008
7:26 AM
We're walking in a winter wonderland
We're walking in a winter wonderland
Im so in love with this song by Jason Mraz, ( actually, im so in love with Jason Mraz ), the song, Winter wonderland. I love songs like that, gets me into this really happy mood.
Came up with a stupid analogy of life just now. I had some fries, majority of them were crinkle cut and the others were straight. As i munched on the soggy ones ( i only love soggy fries ), i was thinking how life's just like a crinkle cut fry. All the bumps, and we still enjoy eating them, not that the bumps even make any difference to the taste, the bumps dont stop us from eating them, so those bumps in life too, wont stop me from living.
" time fries" - adapted from Mr Kwek NYJC principal ( i think he meant, " time flies." )
You know this one, in the meadow we can build a snowman and pretend that he is Parson Brown
he'll say "Are you married" we'll say "No man, but you can do the job when you're in town"
Later on, we'll conspire as we dream by the fire babe
we face unafraid the plans that we made
we're walking in a winter wonder land.
Jiayou friends, all of you can make it!
Came up with a stupid analogy of life just now. I had some fries, majority of them were crinkle cut and the others were straight. As i munched on the soggy ones ( i only love soggy fries ), i was thinking how life's just like a crinkle cut fry. All the bumps, and we still enjoy eating them, not that the bumps even make any difference to the taste, the bumps dont stop us from eating them, so those bumps in life too, wont stop me from living.
" time fries" - adapted from Mr Kwek NYJC principal ( i think he meant, " time flies." )
You know this one, in the meadow we can build a snowman and pretend that he is Parson Brown
he'll say "Are you married" we'll say "No man, but you can do the job when you're in town"
Later on, we'll conspire as we dream by the fire babe
we face unafraid the plans that we made
we're walking in a winter wonder land.
Jiayou friends, all of you can make it!