things seem to go downhill now. we argue abt small petty things till it was blown big. we still do haf our good tyms that for sure but ...


so the decision is made. with him getting the payout from werk and paying off his loan, theres seems to be noting here to stop him from going. he wants to travel. just like wat dave did. its a decision he made. not one that we discussed. and all he tells me is that this is the right tym to do it. there wont be another. i totally agree wif that. but ...


we've been avoiding the topic so much and hence all the pettiness. he is not a talker. all the tym we fought, he just choose to ignore and pretend everything is all betta the next day. its hard for me to push things away but i tink i am just waiting for a chance. the right tym to actually talk abt it. and so i will.


things is already hard as it is. and i sense a wall btw us. no effort being made. why? because hes gonna leave. but hes still here and so am i. theres no excuse why there shouldnt be effort in the first place.


i tried looking at differents way but they all seem so scary. frightening for me. i dunno.
i just nd a right tym. den we'll see.