The Treatment Plan

It's hard to know where to begin.
I saw the new doctor a few weeks ago. I drove up to Kfar Saba to see him - Yaakov joined as navigator and, you know, husband.
He said I need to make the following changes:
1. No salicylates - specifically, nothing applied to the skin that has salicylates - this affects everything from body soap to deodorant to which creams I can apply to my kids.
2. A very low-carb diet. For the first month, I'm supposed to teach my body to live without sugar as its energy source. Apparently, it's a big problem both for thyroid sufferers and for fibromyalgia sufferers.
3. Adding both Vitamin D and Iron to my list of daily supplements.
4. Taking Hydrocortisone for the next month to help with 'adrenal fatigue.'
5. Adding Guafenesin twice a day.

I've been on the Guafenesin for two days now, and I'm not feeling a big difference, but that's ok.

The thing to note now is where I'm having trouble:

• I'm experiencing pain everywhere. Even typing and mousing hurts after a minute or two. 
• I'm tired during the day, and jumpy at night. I have insomnia, but I can't seem to do anything with the energy I have at night. If left alone, I'll sleep very well from about 6am to 3pm. The rest of the time, it's hard for me to sleep at all.
• It's hard for me to concentrate. 
• Restless legs - it's hard for me to sit still and not move my legs - this also seems to be different at different times of the day.
• Sudden chills/sweats. It seems to happen mostly when I've been standing for a while - it's better when I'm sitting, lying down, or even walking, but if I'm just standing, I'll often break into a sweat and feel lightheaded. It feels completely awful. I can feel the blood draining from my face, and sometimes I wish I'd just pass out so that maybe someone would notice that I'm having a problem. 

There's a lot more to tell, but my typing ability is limited, as is my time...

Shabbat Shalom to all

LGG

Just Like Starting Over

It's weird to start writing in my blog again right now - when things are so crazy - and not to write about it. The thing is, I don't think I have anything to contribute right now. Rockets are falling on Israel, the military is preparing to wage a ground war. People I care about are in danger. Some of my friends have left their homes for safer places. I haven't heard a siren yet. I haven't heard the rockets exploding (though apparently, people who live quite nearby have heard them.) I'm feeling very protective of my kids, my family, my friends, my nation. But I really don't feel that I have any great wisdom to add to the mix.

In all honesty, what is really occupying my time these days is my sickness. For those tuning in for the first time today, here's the story:
I'm 34, married +2. My daughter is 5, and my son is 3.5.
I was diagnosed with thyroid problems when I was 19, and with fibromyalgia when I was 23.
I've been in near-constant pain for over ten years, with my symptoms increasing radically after each pregnancy, though we were able to resolve a lot of the issues after the first pregnancy, after the second, I never really recovered. Since then, my situation has been getting steadily worse.

I'm tired, in a lot of pain, and very overweight.
I can barely work. Typing often hurts. I can't keep up with the housework, even though we have a cleaner once a week. I have difficulty being a good mother. I have difficulty living my life. I've been getting steadily worse for years. I want to have more kids, but that's out of the question while my health is so problematic.

A few weeks ago, I began a desperate search for a new doctor, and now I've found someone who I think might just be able to really help me.

Welcome - this is an invitation to join me on my journey to getting my life back.

Last Thursday, I went for my first intake meeting with the new doctor, and today, I went for a series of blood tests. I hope to have more - and good - news soon.

Am I a Liar?

There's a question that's really been plaguing me lately I don't know quite how to define it. I'm in a fibro flare. I'm in intense amounts of pain pretty much constantly, and exertion aggravates it some, though I'm not really sure how much. Ibuprofen helps a little, but even with the highest safe dose, I'm in a considerable amount of pain.

Here's where the problem comes in – Say Ephraim falls asleep on the couch. I can pick him up and take him to his bed. It hurts, but once I put him down, I don't think I'm in any more pain than I was before. Say I'm at my desk working or watching a video or something, getting up is painful, but again, once I reseat myself, I'm not really in any worse pain than I was before. So is it fair for me to ask my husband to handle these things when I *can* do them?

I tend to say 'I can't' when I mean 'it will hurt me.' That's a lie. I can. But it's so hard for me to force myself to do painful things. And it's so hard for me to explain how much pain I'm in or how much things hurt me without seeming like a whiner.

I don’t want to be a whiner. I don't want to be considered lazy. And I don't want to be in pain.

First Post of 2012

I've been so busy writing for other people that my blog has lain desolate... "bloggi sheli lo notarti..."
Anyway, I know you've all been wondering what happened with my diet.

This is kind of sad. No, actually, it's very sad.

I lost 8 kilograms, and then I got stressed, loosened up a bit, and it ALL CAME BACK. ALL of it!
I weigh what I did when I went to Ephraim's birthday party 15 months ago, and looked at those pictures with shock and horror.

I will say that I *think* that I managed to gain some muscle in there, because my clothes still fit better than they did then, and my face doesn't look as puffy (at least to me). So let's say it's like I only gained back 6 of the 8 kilos. It's still awful, miserable. All that progress gone.

So now, I'm on a new plan. I bought this device called a Fitbit, and it monitors how many steps I take, how many flights of stairs I climb, and how much I sleep. On its online dashboard, there's a place to enter all my food and it tracks how many calories I'm allowed. Of course, this all happens right before Pesach... so it's going to be a little touch-and-go for those 8-10 days, but I'm going to try to do my best.

I have so many post ideas percolating in my head, but no time to write. I'm going to try to get back to actually blogging for myself, though. I need it.