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so sleep alone tonight
Hello there, I'm a 29-year-old female workerholic who resides in super sunny Singapore.I'm an introverted person. I dont socialize well with people. I can have a decent conversation with you only when I'm truely comfortable being around you. That only happens for every 1 in 10 people from my social network. And so, If I start blabbering nonsense and spitting vulgarities, rest assured. I like being around you. PEACE |
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about this blog
This blog was opened by aliyah to accomodate aliyah's mindless musings and daily rantings.Do enjoy your stay here, and don't take what's not yours! tagboard
affiliates
chingy
fishy
guo xiang
hana
Hui Li
Jo
MinZee
Yin Qin
Shu Hua
Yuniza
blogshops
These blogshops belongs to my friends. Do drop by and have a look! (:
Shops
If you're free or you live near by, do drop by my friend's shop:
Candylicious - selling sweets, candy, biscuits, drinks and lots more.
Specially imported from Japan and other parts of the world.
Location: Green Ridge Shopping Center, 2nd floor, beside a hair saloon and 7-11. Near Jelapang Lrt.
credits
Design: doughnutcrazyIcon: morphine_kissed |
will it always be this painful, will it ever go away?
Where do I begin?How do I convey my pains? Why does it hurt this bad? How do I bring myself to continue from here? 9 years.. I waited, I hoped, I dreamed, I wished, I prayed, I supported, I defended, I loved, I hurt.. Was it all for noting? Does it hurt as much for you as it is for me? Do you even think of me? Perhaps not. You seem much more happier without me. Do I even made a mark in your mind or in your heart? Why does this seem so easy for you? Did you ever loved me? Oh dear God.. Is this what you have planned for me? Give me some direction please. I feel so lost. Why do you have to make this so painful? Why does it have to hurt? Take this pain away please. I don't think I can carry it anymore. Make my heart go numb please. Please make me forget. Do I really want to let it all go? A package that will never be received, A letter that will never be open
H,I know its almost seven years since everything and I dont mean to intrude. I was just merely waiting for the right time to return everything in that box to its rightful owner. Hope these things will not remind you of your bitter past. It really was not my intention to hurt. I had my reasons and I truly feel you're living in those reasons now. Always known Allah have bigger plans for you. Plans that would not involve me. I'm not sure why I'm telling you all these and I don't think it matters anymore to either of us now, but I just feel I owe you an explanation to all the Whys and the Hows etc. Anyway, I'm not sure you remembered but I did leave out several things from that box. Things which I think is wise not to return them to you. I don't want to cause any trouble or misunderstandings with your dearest. Those items are all kept in the safety of my closet, together with the rest of my not too distant past memorabilia. Why keep them? Who knows one day, when im old and super wrinkly, i might ponder about the good old days. Having those things might actually bring back some memories. Good or bad. They're memories made. Like what Adele sings, "Regrets and mistakes, they're memories made.. Who would have known how bittersweet this would taste?" I only pray for your happiness, good health and a bright future for yourself and family. If ever we were to cross path again ( i know we did once before), even though i'll pretend not to see you there (i know you can tell that I'm pretending), I'll only have you and your family's well being in mind. Have an awesome and fruitful life. From an old friend, A. Don't torture yourself Praying for basic humanity
Mama is too kind and they are way too selfish. They kept asking what is mama's issues against them. Mama simply say nothing is wrong. Everything is fine. Why the need to worry? Why the need to be upset?The rest of us know everything is very very wrong. Yet mama denies everything. They on the other hand thinks they are never wrong. Never at fault. Blind of their own shortcomings. Why? Don't they see the sacrifices mama've made for them in ensuring their comfortable living? Cooks for them. Clean after them . Care for their child. What do they do in return? They continue their slobbish ways. They selfishly want their "child free" day offs. They don't have any guilt nor do they have any considerations for others. Why? Are they not ashamed that at their age, there's still someone who picks up after them? Yet, mama continuously cook, clean and care after them and their child. Don't mama deserve a break too? I don't freaking understand. Mama is over 50. She's not getting any younger. Don't she deserve to retire? In all honesty, If you're unwilling to sacrifice for your child, then why bother having any? I'm so freaking pissed. Feel like hitting someone in the freaking face. I'm truly disgusted with the generation today. Heartless selfish creatures! A dose of fresh air
Something which we all need from time to time.3 years of going to and fro, never would I have thought today would happen and of all places too. Yes. I'm utterly aware of your presence. I've said it before and i'll say it again, for some unknown freaky reason, when its you, my senses would go hyperdrive and I can sense your presence from a good distance. Even before we notice each other, my gut tells me to turn my freaking head to the left/right/up and there you'll be standing/sitting/walking. This seriously boggles me. Nevertheless, its nice to see a familiar face. Hope you're doing well :) Sometimes life is just so full of shit
This is a good read people. Share it.http://www.relevantmagazine.com/culture/tech/stop-instagramming-your-perfect-life New Beginnings
Hey bloggie.. Whats up? Miss me?Its been awhile since im here. I read quite a number of my past post and i have to say WHAT WAS I THINKING?! Embarrassing much? *Shakes head* The singlish, the typo, the spelling, the grammatical errors - i can't exactly blame ME coz even today, at this age, I still make such errors. I dont think i'll ever get this right. Hehs.. Okayy... I know im not much of a writer but surely i could do better than that, right?.. Anyway, I've removed all my crappy post and planning to start anew, starting with this post (; Its been years since i open this blog. Apart from my crappy writing n language, im amazed with what i wrote. Some were seriously random and nonsensical ranting. Several were pretty serious and deep - most of which i don't want to relive. Life can be so unpredictable that things never turn out the way we've planned or hoped for. Theres many good times of coz (: But theres also moments which are bad, sad and disappointing even ): As much as i would like to erase all the sad and crappy moments, i don't think i'll mind reliving any of them. Coz to me, embarrassing moments are much more painful to bare. If possible, i would like to eradicate them completely from my memory and also of those who bare witness to it. Really man.. Its the hardest thing to go through and yet, its even harder to forget. Yes, we can all laugh about it but honestly, making a fool of yourself, by accident especially, is a crappy feeling. It affects you psychologically and it stays with you mann... And at the end of the day, people normally remember the funny more than the happy.. tsk tsk tsk Sometimes, i wish life was like a blog. Theres always an Edit & Delete button. Always given the option to write Whatever, edit them Whenever and totally Delete them off when you know it should not be read by anyone. 25years of life.. so much have happened.. so much have changed.. so much teachings one could ever gain.. what else have he planned for me I wonder |