Ed's Crap
Tuesday, December 28, 2010 @ First time playing soccer after more than a year
Soccer with Ian, Sherm and chang shui and Ian's friends. I kinda miss the 'as long as we are having fun' style of playing while we criticize each other while playing just like the time in 3DA. I remembered the times when nobody bothered to defend Coz I was on a good run and had to constantly block shots with my body/arms/legs/face so often that I likened myself to a target board.

I learnt that insomnia and soccer don't mix well Coz it was really difficult to focus today and I let in quite a handful of sloppy goals. I dunno why I kept thinking so much about so many random stuff last night that I couldn't fall asleep.

I've got extremely sore thighs and butt now due to the lack of lower body excercises when I was in Melbourne. I'm spamming muscle rubs now Coz it speeds up the recovery.

Monday, December 27, 2010 @ The holiday mood finally sets in
Woow. I'm finally in the holiday mood! Just got home from gathering with the gang, soccer with army mates tomorrow morning, gathering with my army mates on Wednesday and possibly clubbing on Wednesday night itself then finally a gathering with the gang at my place on new year's eve. It's so packed but I'm glad to catch up with friends.

I shall probably do a review of my 2010 tomorrow or Thursday or I won't have time for it before new year.

Had a Deja vu moment while chatting with the gang in Mac. So many Deja vu moments occurring Coz I was so stressed in my final semester but the dream of mum winning the lottery is still so ever elusive XD

I'm still a little bummed about my plans being wrecked so suddenly but I gotta accept that life is unpredictable, so one should always plan ahead and look forward. Looking backwards is to only learn from past mistakes and not for regrets.

Thursday, December 23, 2010 @ The Push and Pull Game
Right when I decided to work first before considering to further my studies, I was shown a glimmer of hope in my search for a project for Masters in Biomed Science (Part 1). Life is really playing a game of push and pull with me right now ><

I still feel really tempted to start working first though but I'll wait and see how things turn out for now since I found a project that is available. It's sometimes frustrating Coz I was told to make decisions yet some of them still get overwritten. I don't see why I should bother to make decisions when it's gonna be overwritten anyway.

Regarding the project, it's not something that I don't have interest in but it seems very difficult. Gonna be murdering mice and doing flow cytometry again but this time it might involve even more colors.

I really don't know what to expect anymore after my plans were suddenly thrown into a mess. I just wished that things as important as this could be done with a lot less uncertainty.

Saturday, December 18, 2010 @ Post Created Dec 18, 2010 5:12:17 AM
I need to sort my future out no matter how devastated I am. I feel like taking the easy way out by working first then masters later which i know is most likely to happen but I'll still try to look for a project.

Reached another crossroad in life with another decision to make. I need to sit down and really think properly.

Wednesday, December 15, 2010 @ I'm a graduate :)
I have finally graduated! I am still reeling in shock and a little upset about having to put plan C into action though. I still can't believe so many bad stuff can happen at the same time all in a day.

Dad was going on just now about how showing interest would increase my chances but would the faculty really give a damn about it? I already said so many times that it's the Uni and not the lab which rejected me that I'm starting to sound like a broken record. I'm upset enough that I have to put plan C into action yet I still have to face accusations of not showing enough interest. I'm took the failure really really hard and yet this kind of stuff happens. Please give me a break and a breather Coz deep down inside, I'm still hurting.

Tuesday, December 14, 2010 @ just when you think things can't get any worse
Omg. Looks like my stay at Melbourne is gonna be cut short. The lab that is taking me in can only do that for a year Coz Belinda is taking a 6 month holiday at the end of the year. Masters takes 2 years and she doesn't want to ditch me for my masters after the bridging course. Now my plan is totally screwed Coz I failed to do honors. I can only blame it on bad timing and bad luck which isn't entirely new. Everything came crashing down just like that and now I gotta use plan C. Maybe I'm just not fated to go that far in my studies.

Fortunately my habit of not buying unnecessary items have paid off. Can't believe my stuff could be packed into 3 luggages and loads of hand carry bags in 3 hours. Lol!

Thank you everyone for making my stay a fun and enjoyable one especially Jeremy, Gan, Stefanos, Munjoo and Angelique. I'll really miss everyone :)

Monday, December 13, 2010 @ it still hurts like hell deep inside
looks like i have to stay back for awhile to complete my application for Masters in Biomed Sci (Part 1).

i'm still very upset coz i didn't get into honors. like i always say, the higher u aim, the harder u fall when you fail. i probably need a good slap or kick to make me come to terms with my failure and move on. this is probably the failure that i will remember for the rest of my life. it plainly shows that both hard work and talent are required to be successful of which i lack the talent (thus talentless_ed as my twitter id) and probably lacking a little in the hard work too even though i worked a lot harder than in the past. so how much hard work would be considered enough to be successful? maybe i should take a break from studying and start working before i attempt any further studies. its not gonna help when my morale and determination have hit rock bottom. i really wish that i could find something to do that would distract me instead of worrying about the Masters application which keeps reminding me of my failure.

Song that represents my mood now
Linkin Park-In The End

reason: i tried so hard and got so far, in the end it doesn't even matter. enough said.

please don't allow me to get drunk this year. i am afraid it would be a lot worse than what happened last year.

Me
Ed Teo
060887
Uni Graduate
Monash Uni Clayton
Oakleigh East, Melbourne

Things Urgently Needed Wanted
-Allergy research
-Lead a simple life
-Snowboarding
-More Snowboarding
-Skydiving
-Bungee Jumping?

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