We are trying to enjoy the last few weekends of summer.  I am so ready to say 'Adios summer, it was good knowing you!'  But with the idea of a old long cold Idaho winter ahead of us, I will try to enjoy these last few weekends if it kills me.

I am So So ready for Fall!  And Halloween!  And cooking all the yummy dinners that are just to hot to cook in the summer time!  And the leafs turning!  And pumpkins!  And jackets!  And the holidays!  And a NEW BABY!!!   

Get moving Summer!

Yesterday I started realizing that in a few short weeks we could be bringing baby home anytime.  In all reality I am sure baby girl will wait as long as possible, and probably end up being born the first of October (pleeeease, please, please, please nooooo).  So this morning after I laid Sailyr down for her morning nap I got to work cleaning out the extra upstairs bedroom.  Then I dug out the bassinet, new born clothes, and baby blankets out of storage and washed everything.  Sailyr was awake while I was folding most of it,  and was getting so frustrated because the little tiny baby shoes would not fit. I forgot how tiny newborns are,  looking at how small the little socks and diapers just makes me so excited.  And it also makes Sailyr seem that much bigger.

Devin and I were talking about the baby last night and trying to remember 'newborn days' with Sailyr.  I was telling him that I am not nervous about late night feedings, so many people complain about late night feedings.  And when Sailyr was a baby I did not think they were that bad, my body just went into mommy mode and I hopped right out of bed, I was actually sad when she started sleeping through the nights because those night time feedings were so precious.  I am also not scared about having two kids in diapers, its another thing that so many people complain about and it just does not bother me.  Except for the price of them... yes, I hate buying diapers.  I hardly ever take Sailyr shopping by myself right now, I usually wait until weekends or evenings when Devin is home to go do grocery shopping.  So the fact that I am not going to be leaving the house for a year or so is nothing new.

The only thing I am really nervous about when it comes to bring home baby #2 is not having enough hands.  Sailyr is still so little and loves to be held and snuggled and is still a baby in so many ways.  She has also never had to share me, so she is used to getting lots of attention.  I just hope I can be enough of a mother for 2 of them, so that at the end of the day both of my baby girls have been loved on enough. 

We have began the art of conversation with this little one.  She has learned to say yes or no when we ask her a question.  And also learning the difference between yes and no.  She usually does pretty good at communicating with us.  Last night Devin and I could not stop laughing at a few of our conversations with her.  I decided I need to write them down before I forget them. 

Devin got home from work one day, walked into the kitchen and said "smells like bar-b-q chicken."  and from the couch came a very confident "yeah."  She said it just like, yeah, I am making dinner, like I do every night.  No biggie.

Then last night Sailyr was in her car seat and Devin asked her if she was a stinky pants.  She put her hands up to her mouth and scrunched her shoulders up and giggled really hard.  He asked her again, and she just continued to laugh.  We were laughing with her, and Devin said "is that funny?" Between her little giggles came a little "yeah".

In our minds she is too little still to be able to understand what we are talking about.  And its just so funny to us when she is able to answer our questions.  I know she understands when I ask questions like are you hungry?  Do you want to take a nap?  Do you want your sippy?  because I ask them a couple times a day.  But when she joins in on conversations about bar-b-q chicken we cant help but think its so cute and funny.  I think most of it is she just wants to talk so she will answer anything that sounds like a question.  She also gets the most serious look on her face when she answers you, like she is so confident in her little opinion.  Funny little girl.

34and a half weeks!!!

36 weeks if you go by my original due date.

• Sleeping great! Wake up a few times with aching hips so I have to sit up and turn over, but I always get to sleep quickly and sleep through the night.
• I feel baby move all the time.  Her movements are not little kicks, they feel more like full on dance performances.  She is quite the little busy body already.  Which has me and Devin a bit frightened.
• She gets hick-ups at least once a day.
• I am feeling like its getting close, feeling huge and its getting harder to move around.  Energy is starting to leave me again.  Hardly anything fits comfortably anymore.
• Without knowing what she is really doing, Sailyr will run up to me when I am sitting on the couch and give my tummy a hug.  Then look up at me and smile, I think its so cute.  Everyone asks me if she knows we are going to have a baby, and I really don't think she does.
• I purchased some preemie jammies (because I remembered how newborn clothes did not fit sailyr the first 2 weeks or so) My mom also gave me a couple pairs of jammies, onsies, and a new born outfit.  Devin's mom made the softest, pretties baby blanket.  I have to hide it from Sailyr because she loves how soft it is.  We also have been given some diapers.  But I need to get out our box of newborn clothes and blankets and get them washed.
• Not really craving anything anymore, I just feel to tired to cook.  So I usually eat whatever is easiest.
• The heat this summer has killed me, and I am so thankful it is starting to cool down.
• No name yet, although we might have it narrowed down. 
• I know they moved my due date back, but I really hope she comes sometime between my first due date and the new one.  I'm not really sure what to plan, but come middle of September I am going to be doing everything I can to go into labor. 

I am beyond excited to get this little girl here, and become the mother to two sweet girls!  I cant wait!  

Last week was our 5 year anniversary.
It happened to land on the opening weekend of Devin's hunt in Nevada.
And I figured that because I am 8 months pregnant, and have no ambition to do anything right now anyway (Plus we have yet to find a sitter in Idaho so that means date night would include Sailyr)
Soooo..... I would be a nice wife and let him go hunt. 
(next year he owes me big time :)

5 years has sorta flown by, sometimes I look around at our "grown up" life and I miss us.  I miss the dating us, and the newly wed us.  Maybe I just miss our relationship before kids.  I miss weekends with him that did not include nap times and car seats and diapers and sippy cups.  And I miss going out on date night without worrying about a one year old spilling my drink all over.  I miss just being with him, alone, even a trip to walmart together sounds wonderful. 
Times have changed.
Luckily, sometimes after we tuck that little one into bed at night I still catch a glimpse of the old us hanging out on the couch.  Proof to my tired little heart that the old 'us' are still right here.

I do however, feel like we are so much more grounded and secure in our marriage since having kids.   Nobody has the prefect marriage, and I am not going to pretend like we do.  But I would have to say,  we have a beautiful life together!  And when I am 95, there is no one I would rather have sitting next to me on the front porch. 



Love this :

“... What really matters is that he will love you,that he will respect you, that he will honor you, that he will be absolutely true to you, that he will give you the freedom of expression and let you fly in the development of your own talents. He is not going to be perfect, but if he is kind and thoughtful, if he knows how to work and earn a living, if he is honest and full of faith, the chances are you will not go wrong, that you will be immensely happy.” Gordon B. Hinckley

And this:

Romance is nice. But it is biological in origin. That dizzy head-over-heels feeling is a species of losing your mind, and most of the time it lasts only as long as the chase. What we keep forgetting is that in marriage, as opposed to romances, you aren't marrying the thrilling wonderful perfect Someone you're looking at right now. You're marrying the man who decides not to have the dazzling career with the high salary, refusing promotions and transfers so the kids don't have to change schools. You're marrying the woman whose body doesn't bounce back after the third baby, so she's no longer slim and attractive by the standards of the magazines. You're marrying the migraines and the hemorrhoids and the heart attack and the cancer; you're marrying the irritable, forgetful, lazy, thoughtless, sarcastic, distracted, too-busy days as well as the Kodak-happy ones.

You're marrying the one who works with you to raise the crippled child, or stands with you at the graveside of the child who dies. You're marrying the one who can't find work after the company folds or he's laid off; you're marrying the early Alzheimer's, the diabetes, the obesity, the pain of conflict and the struggle of forgiveness. The foundation of that isn't some ideal of romantic love. It's a commitment based on the goals you share. And real love, married love, is not what you start with--it's what you create together along the way.

--Orson Scott Card

 

These are just a few pictures I took while we were in Panguitch.  Photo sessions with Sailyr are not like they used to be, I am actually shocked that I got some of her sitting and smiling.  These days I have to put my zoom lens on and try and capture the pictures while she is across the yard playing.  The world is just too exciting to waist time sitting still and smiling for mama.  I had actually just pulled her out of a pile of dirt right before this picture, luckily her backside and shoes got most of it and the front of her dress was still clean. 

Oh, the life of a toddler.... 

back in Idaho

We made it back to Idaho yesterday.  Sailyr slept 5 of the 6 hours home.  She woke up about 20 minutes from our house and looked at the "hhssssyyyy" (horses) out the window.
Right when we got here she kicked one shoe off and ran out back, under the apple tree.  She and Lucy both seemed happy to be home.   I sat out on the back porch and watched Devin move the sprinklers around and Lucy and Sailyr play.  Baby Girl was doing flips in my tummy.  

Its great to be home!

We are having a good time in Panguich!  We came down for a family reunion and Sailyr and I stayed while Devin went back to Idaho to work for a few days, then out hunting in Nevada.  We decided to go stay at the cabin one night, being so close and all.

 Then it was off to the reunion...

 That afternoon Sailyr was so miserable, so finally I asked her if she wanted to take a nap.  And she shook her head yes really hard and said "YES, YES".  So Devin set up her pack and play in a little grove of trees and layed her down.  I did not think she would really go to sleep out there, but she did not move.  And about 2 hours later we ended up having to wake her up because it was starting to rain.

 The rest of the week we have been back and forth between my mom's house and Devin's mom's house.  Its been so fun getting to see family and also let Sailyr see cousin Crue.  Although she is not very nice to him, which has caused lots of melt downs and time outs.  She is pretty jealous, especially when I hold him.  It makes me nervous for this new baby.  All I can hope is that it will be better being in our own house and having Devin there.  Poor little Crue had to be the practice baby, I owe him ice cream or something when he is older, because he has been hit, yelled at, pushed, and had his toys taken away.  Poor little guy.

 Sailyr has also had fun at Grandma Corrine's,  I thought these were some cute pictures of them out in the pea patch.

Devin is coming home today so we will be making our way back to Idaho in the next few days.

p.s. this is the week Sailyr learned how to climb out of her pack and play... :(