The tidal wave has really taken it's toll. Say a little prayer for the victims. 28th out to play pool w boon, jade, miao, reb kan. fun! my group never won once no matter how i regrouped. haha. jinxed la. went to eat. the rest went off. met mei, mum and xiao biao. brought them back to e same place to eat again. hah. shopped till orchard's close. homed. 29th went to celebrate jingxuan's bday. Met at 12. I WAS ON TIME. ahha.. went pizza hut. hui took damn long to come. so made MARY(jx's english name) walked abt. finally hui came w cake. sang her bday song. then left for her hse. liyi, sookteng, hui left. made a prank abt josef tan. hah. then pushed her into the pool and all. ahhahahaha. mary's too gulliable. :::contemplated:::

24th

xmas was alright. wasn't fun but interesting and amusing. ironic. hah. last min decided to go for midnight mass. it's like 20min before twelve, and the church is already so packed. din managed to get a sit. father gave fruit cake. met aunty maria. ended up spending xmas passing food up and down the stairs. (she lives below me). passed ham, hot dogs, volka to her. and got mutton curry and coke in return. hahha. opened presents. slept at four. had few shots of volka cos the rest refuse to drink. slept at ard 4am.

25th

woke up at 11am. met godma. steamboat. mei bought sch books. a part was screwed. shalln't elaborate. life's as normal.

26th

church. went ps. spotlight. shopping for new yr stuff.... going out on tue. yeah! :::contemplated:::

out with jos, hL, jade. was late due to jam. went play pool. we improved. slacked. bored. homed. why must i meet her when i'm trying to forget her. god makes fun of man.
:::contemplated:::

sometimes i wish i'm 21. will there be a difference. :::contemplated:::

i went to cjc. the end. :::contemplated:::

my phone died. told dad. he pretended that he did not know. told mum. she laughed. hahha.

got woken up early by auntie maria. mum and sis talked to father joe abt transfer. called clement. hah. too funny.

went chinatown. no fate. but oh wells. saw the sin bowler. so-so la. hah. sis was saying tt he's quite good looking or smth tt sort. ate la mian. nice. but din finish and flew off to meet jade. fifteen mins late. (excluding e fact tt she was early). ran to take the mrt. was freezing.

finally met jade. and she was irritated. hahhahah. sorry la. din mean it. took 16 to ps. killed her earphone on the bus. hahah. walked ard. saw nice skirt. went swensons. haha. the woman actually heard that i wanted the window seat. -grins- one ice cream and baked rice. share. hah. full. oh. and THANKS JADE.

kept my promise. and thanked her smartness. walked ard at carefour. injured jade again went trying to escape fr auntie maria. in the end went back to greet her. felt bad. looked at skates and jade changed her mind. met la. then flew to the mrt. was freaking late. tis time not my fault. then in the end, mum and mei were late.

went to church to collect letter. met auntie valeria and doreen. they said i grew. hahahah. luckly we're in time. then collected e letter. and homed.

i love my mum.
:::contemplated:::

woke up at nine, slept at 1.30 yest. not badding. hah. met the rest at cine. was 15min late. the ride made me feel sick. met the rest. went hmv. jos bought her cd. and she got me tis watch cum ring from indo, lingerine (g-string) for miao and HL, necklace for jade and reb, bracelet for serp. walked up hereen. like what is open. oh wells. met shuling. my eyes must be playing tricks. blehx. bought tis star bracelet tgt w hai, miao and jade. took neos. jos is such a bad designer. hahaha. but i'm no better la. then went play pool. ha. jos is quite an expert. and is constantly giving jade stress. hhaaaahaaa. hailin seems too sensitive with the term "hit harder", cos she is bound to screw up her turn when jos said tt. miao pushed back piano. eat at food court. serp came. brought me panadol and saved me fr my agony. miao left for piano. reb came. brought me panadol too. sorry la. took neos again. hha. i kinda screw up the first one by selecting the wrong thing. sorry la. hahahaa. supposed to go k-box. but kinda x. then went cartel. jos, reb, serp ate. miao came back. got free flow of bread. then hai needed to go. so miao, jade, me went off. leaving reb, jos and serp pissed. hah. sorry la.

went w jade to tbp. she bought cd. i bought my mum's coffee. then salted eggs and onions. HOMED. :::contemplated:::

went doc again. crap. spread e flu to my mum. so we both went to e doc. doctor accused me of spreading my flu to her... haha.

the first step has always been hard. this time. it's harder. and longer. oh wells. i'm such a loser. :::contemplated:::

out though it was raining. met godma with mum and mei. her b'day. went eat tim sum. walked ard. read celestial zone!!! yeah! :):) godma left. got aunty pat's grand's batistsm at night. went great world. started well. but.. shalln't elaborate further. sometimes i think my sister takes amusement in seeing me miserable. oh wells. blehx. i'm going out anyway. lalalalalalalala. :::contemplated:::

fever went down. flu got better. cough worsen. phlegm infested. caught a flu on wed. it's so windy and damn it cold. so TADA!!! here i am. blehx. body aches like crap. moans.... :::contemplated:::

towned again. hah. told yinggu don't be late and in e end she was like 20mins early. she actually came out in a rush and forgot to bring money.thanks to me la. ahhhahaaa. waited for her fren to pass her money. jamie came. threesome. the rest died somewhr. went mos, no sit. yoshi. but ta bao corn soup. hahah. e world's broke. except yg. rich pok. and she's nice. :):) watched without a paddle. din have a choice. but din regret it. super funny. hahhaha. inez came in time to catch it. caught guorong w his gf. tsk. took neos. inez went to look ard for choc for her bro. meet steph. she changed. hha. walked to somerset. met mum and sis. it was unpleasant. shalln't elaborate.
thanks la.
i would have felt so out. -beams-
:::contemplated:::

ta-da! transformed. give me one day and i'm myself again. hahaaa. we'll just have a threesome. blehx. this is gona be boring. blah blah blah. :::contemplated:::

went cine yest. almost died of boredom waiting for reb tan and boon. walked ard with reb kan and miao. walked the whole of cine. they finally arrived. no pool table, so went kfc. boon is too jian. shall not elaborate. went back and got table no. 7. played. boon became a pro overnight. hah. something hilarious happened. hhaaaaahaaaa. reb tan is just too attractive. anyway, i still insist that it's pari-(dice) and not pari-(disc). we shall see. then, miao went home. went and eat tis 4.90 sharkfin set meal in lucky plaza. i must admit it's nice. we'll go again when pei comes back. went and walk ard cos the princess happily didn't bring key. tsk. went taka. and reb tan still own me a "tight slap" since i managed to find a sixty plus jacket at foxs. boon and reb kan left. walked to cine. reb tan suppose to meet her cousins and instead went to meet her friend. arguements abt rape cases. hah. got onto 16 and HOMED! :::contemplated:::

the drilling is really bad. reading and reading. can't wait for monday to come. -grins- bored bored bored. reading and reading. am i a nerd or what. :::contemplated:::

taufik won. i still want olinda. if i'm not out, it's either badminton, jogging or reading. loads of books now. (: i'm a happy girl. i'm a bored girl. blehx. :::contemplated:::

got played out.

childhood is the root of a person. with a screwed up childhood, what else will you become? those who are thinking of having a child. think twice. you're just about to ruin another person's life. so what if you try to break free. the past is still there. holding you back.

stop stop stop. stop right now. stop.

:::contemplated:::

watched a video on korea of someone's holiday tt lasted for like half an hour plus. bored. bored. bored. mountians mountains and more mountians.

out on mon, tue, wed, thur, next thur. which means... i'm actually quite free. bored pple can come and date me. hahhahaahha... still having stomach ache until now. whines. i'm going to e toilet. blehx.

i'll miss crescent a whole great loads. it has been a major turn in my life every since i'm in crescent. and after four years, i'm leaving. with i must say-- fond memories, great friends, few true friends, maluations, fun, care, good experience that i'll never forget, caring teachers that we'll never get in jc.... but there are disappointments, remorse, regrets, hurt, cuts, and dreadful teachers as well. ups downs lefts rights. we all had it all. i'll miss crescent. everybit.

:::contemplated:::

i've officially graduated. out of crescent. grad night was great. in fact, it was one of the best moments in crescent. started with everyone taking photos after photos. everybody looked great. the dinner was alright, but it doesn't worth 70 bucks leh. won a ten dollars voucher to world of sports after many attempts of moaning for the lucky draw. hah. i want the i pod!!! too bad joyce is the lucky pok. tsk. luckily it's not orange. hah. then eat eat eat. then played some games of singing christmas songs w animal voices... blah. the teachers lost. hahaahahahha... too bad. miss chua won the best dress teacher. yupps. yupps. she deserve it. hah. then prom queen. this girl from s2. cyn still rock. then dancing i tink. not bad. i crushed jade's leg. heh. and someone stepped on my leg too. k. it bleed. yups, was fun and energy draining. then class photos.

back to room. boon and becca kan came over. some giggolo thing. shalln't comment. hah. (inside joke) then changed. decided tt we'll b too freaked out w shutters. so din watch. attempted to tink of ways to sneak into club. but gave up in the end. blehx. cannot make it la. delayed for a long long time then out. met them. miao, pei, reb and i went cine. miao and i at e instant noodles. shalln't comment on the LC place sprawling w disgusting people. ate inside cheers. malu la. hah. went play pool finally. reb and i were a disgrace. hah. dont know how to play still act smart. met hui and pple. she taught me k. hah. then reb kan and boon came. tt pek la. want to laz ard in e hotel. boring. too bad she missed out. hah. played for an hour. fun! in e end miao was e one who got e black ball in. hah. then finally decided to go back.

went 7/11 and bought drinks. hah. i look 18. this stupied jade, scared malu. tsk. back to hotel. it's like some kind of a soda. low alcoholic content wat. so much gas. kept burping. stomah ache till morning. watched chucky. morbit show. so gory. then was very tired and all. stomach ache. went 24th floor. and e rest cant really remember. too sleepy. hah. cabed home. :::contemplated:::

cut hair in e morning. 12 choices is really quite a lot. got many new cuts and blue black tt i didn't know they existed. someone must have been abusing me when i sleep or smth. rashes got worse. my legs are rotting. rot rot rot. blehx. :::contemplated:::

jc jc jc. education should die. get a divorce. what's the point. rot and die. :::contemplated:::

blah blah blah. prom's coming. yeah. going out. yups. got my gown. trying to act sweet la. blehx. :::contemplated:::

selfish craps.
my mum rocks!
:::contemplated:::

vote for olinda!!! :::contemplated:::

blah blah blah. studying rocks my world. blehx blehx blehx. :::contemplated:::

buzzing at the background.
died mugging. bored. :::contemplated:::

my bio died.
maybe i should die too.

i've left kengseng with many regrets.
once again. i'm leaving crescent with regrets as well.
somethings are just fated.

promised my sis to insult her school. so ya. QUEENSTOWN SECONDARY SUCKS. :::contemplated:::

guess what. my e maths flew to the mountains too. fantastic man. o's is gona be worse than prelims i guess. as usual. everyone finds it ok. blehx. :::contemplated:::

my a maths and lit is flying somewhere in the mountains. gone. what else can i say when everyone finds it easy. fantastic. :::contemplated:::

it's a wonder i've not died of fatigue yet.

:::contemplated:::

Welcome to my life simple plan Do you ever feel like breaking down?
Do you ever feel out of place?
Like somehow you just don't belong
And no one understands you

Do you ever wanna run away?
Do you lock yourself in your room?
With the radio on turned up so loud
That no one hears you screaming

No you don't know what it's like
When nothing feels alright
You don't know what it's like to be like me

To be hurt
To feel lost
To be left out in the dark
To be kicked
When you're down
To feel like you've been pushed around
To be on the edge of breaking down
When no one's there to save you
No you don't know what it's like
Welcome to my life

Do you wanna be somebody else?
Are you sick of feeling so left out?
Are you desperate to find something more
Before your life is over
Are you stuck inside a world you hate?
Are you sick of everyone around?
With the big fake smiles and stupid lies
But deep inside you're bleeding

No you don't know what it's like
When nothing feels alright
You don't know what it's like to be like me

To be hurt
To feel lost
To be left out in the dark
To be kicked
When you're down
To feel like you've been pushed around
To be on the edge of breaking down
When no one's there to save you
No you don't know what it's like
Welcome to my life

No one ever lies straight to your face
And no one ever stabbed you in the back
You might think I'm happy
But I'm not gonna be ok
Everybody always gave you what you wanted
You never had to work it was always there
You don't know what it's like
What it's like

To be hurt
To feel lost
To be left out in the dark
To be kicked
When you're down
To feel like you've been pushed around
To be on the edge of breaking down
When no one's there to save you
No you don't know what it's like

To be hurt
To feel lost
To be left out in the dark
To be kicked
When you're down
To feel like you've been pushed around
To be on the edge of breaking down
When no one's there to save you
No you don't know what it's like
Welcome to my life
Welcome to my life
Welcome to my life

somehow or another. we've all failed to be a family.
:::contemplated:::,br>

how can i not miss crescent.
how can i not miss my refuge, my second home.
-screams for sa-
a far away dream.
:::contemplated::

there are just too many things to be done.
too many things to be fulfilled.
too many things to be done.
too many things to be completed.
too many things to worry about.
too many things to distract you.
too many things, just too many things.
chem pract was mega screwed.
wat's new. I MUST STUDY LIKE A MAD PIG.
hah. but i won't la. blehx. jade's a hardworking girl that sleeps four hours.
i'm like haha. ok. i'm start working like crap.
:::contemplated:::

the ecosystem starts to deteriorate after the lady bird left.
biology is driving me nuts. blehx.
buddy buddy please don't cry
you're forget me by and b
it's been six years since you're gone
buddy i married your best friend john
huh. this song just suddenly pop out from my deep down memory box. blehx. hah. sec threes. :::contemplated:::

"for every ending, there's new beginning;
for every memory, there's a dream ahead"
contant putting in of effort wears you out.
tired.
:::contemplated:::

went pj open house today. at first really hate it like crap. then, ya. it seems better now. ha. the people are nice. so if anyone of you staying in jurong area, can really consider. but it's far la. can't imagine myself traveling to and fro everyday. neway, it's still back to the square one. no matter how good and friendly the school or any other school is. i will never be happy there. how can i not miss crescent.
:::contemplated:::

tomorrow's gona be farewell assembly.
the official last day of my four years in crescent.
come to think of it, crescent is the place that makes me what and who i am.
although it's kinda crap, and i don't really like it tt much now.
but yeah. i'll definitely miss it a lot.
i bet tomorrow they're gona play "if we hold on together" AGAIN.
but, it nv fails to make the past sec four batch's emotions run.
so i guess, it'll just be the same for us.
IF WE HOLD ON TOGETHER
Don't lose your way With each passing day You've come so far Don't throw it away Live believing Dreams are for weaving Wonders are waiting to start Live your story Faith, hope and glory Hold to the truth in your heart
If we hold on together I know our dreams will never die Dreams see us through to forever Where clouds roll by For you and i
Souls in the wind Must learn how to bend Seek out a star Hold on to the end Valley, mountain There is a fountain Washes our tears all away Words are swaying Somebody is praying Please let us come home to stay
If we hold on together I know our dreams will never die Dreams see us through to forever Where clouds roll by For you and i
When we are out there in the dark We'll dream about the sun In the dark we'll feel the light Warm our hearts, everyone.
If we hold on together I know our dreams will never die Dreams see us through to forever As high as souls can fly The clouds roll by For you and i
i will miss you guys.
:::contemplated:::

it's just one more week. i love them as much as i loved them from the start. it'll never change. no matter who happened before, in betweens, afters, the future, whatever... memories of them have already been etched in my heart. it'll never change. although somethings are just like that and will remain like that, i still want to say that i really appreciate them and will always do. they are already part of me, and no matter what, they are already bonded to me, and are within me. so yes. i love you guys a great great deal. thanks for everything. really. everything. :::contemplated:::

angst. :::contemplated:::

come to think of it. the ice cream man is right. even if you have a million and one wealthy family members, relatives, friends, like who is really going to support you. you're just end up fending for yourself anyway. studying hard is really just the thing. the rest are in fact all secondary. what will really last you through a lifetime is your degree. sad but true. it's reality. farewell assembly on friday. all those great aspirations are like down the drain. who still dares to dream anyway. :::contemplated:::

so much for the hard work. so much for the four to five hours of sleep. so much for the extensive mugging that causes white hair. so much for all the lies about moderation. so much for all false hopes. so much for my happy ending. :::contemplated:::

come to think of it. i can't wait for farewell assembly. the only crap thing is that after farewell assembly, it's only two weeks to o's. that's the bad part. oh wells. we'll see. :::contemplated:::

lady in me day. yup. it was fun. funky clothes. took photos. yeah. right. it's fun k. Desiderata Go placidlyl amid the noise and haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence. As far as possible without surrender be on good terms with all person. You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe in unfolding as it should. yes. everyone has right. but that's only when you're living in the candy clouds. in reality, it's a far cry. far cry. :::contemplated:::

i refuse to believe that blogger worked. it did? hahah. ok. that's mega lame. yeah. i'm back! haha. why can't they give me some peace. :::contemplated:::

it's over. :::contemplated:::

everything is damn screwed. :::contemplated:::

sch for consultation for relative velocity. apparently, i still don't quite get wat's happening when mole, la and janice are somewhr thr. too bad. homed. slacked. watched e spiderman 2 vcd. hoho. my sis borrowed it fr my dad. so ya. rewatched. miao must be totally green now. -grins- blehx. no one's there during the thunderstorms. :::contemplated:::

i want michelle's yellow bra!!! candy canes, candy floss, fancy rainbows, stormy rain, thunder and lightning, are you game. :::contemplated:::

it's like a candy cane that's out of reach. when you finally, with all your strength and might manage to touch it. it melts. the end. finger eleven--one thing. If I traded it all If I gave it all away for one thing Just for one thing If I sorted it out If I knew all about this one thing Wouldn’t that be something :::contemplated:::

i want to live in candy floss clouds. and eat candy floss. and get fat. blehx. Ohhhhh It seems like I can finally rest my head on something real I like the way that feels Ohhhhh It's as if you've know me better than I ever knew myself I love how you can tell Ohhhhh I love how you can tell Ohhhhh I love how you can tell All the pieces, pieces, pieces of me All the pieces, pieces, pieces of me... :::contemplated:::

i must study. study. study. study. study. study. study. study. study. study. study. study. study. study. study. study. study. study. study. study. study. study. study. study. study. study. study. study. study. study. study. study. study. study. study. study. study. study. study. study. study. everything is too fake. :::contemplated:::

from now onwards, i'll be independent. :::contemplated:::

went out and met pri sch frens yest. almost everyone changed. yup. was alrigt. got home and got scolded for going out of course. blehx. btw, just discovered tt it seems that the whole world wants to get into SA. ha. i can slowly dream tt i'll ever get in. everything is simply so fake. everything is really so so so fake. :::contemplated:::

fake. just so fake.

Trying not to reach out

But when I'd try to speak out

Felt like no one could hear me

Wanted to belong here

But something felt so wrong here

So I pray (I would pray)

I could breakaway

I'll spread my wings and I'll learn how to fly

I'll do what it takes til' I touch the sky

I'll make a wish

Take a chance

Make a change

And breakaway

Out of the darkness and into the sun

But I won't forget all the ones that I loved

I'll take a risk

Take a chance

Make a change

And breakaway, breakaway, breakaway.

i'll break away.

:::contemplated:::

everything is changing. nothing will ever be the same again. maybe i can just got to the fluffy clouds and eat candy floss all my life. and do what i want to do. be what i want to be. feel what i want to feel. and just be myself. hah. it's just a spas dream that will never ever come true. everyone's getting upset. hohoho. tt's like damn sadistic. tt's life anyway. never procrastinate. never.:::contemplated:::

for once. i've decided to really listen to e mass. and omg. i can't qualify for heaven. haha. you're got to have a clear conscience to enter heaven. i've jus wasted 9 years in church doing nothing other than day dreaming and sleeping. i've lost nine whole years of preaching. somethings. you only start appreciating it when you lost it. but that's life. hah. it's high time i wake up now. and listen. and learn. and contemplate. better stop jinxing pple. blehx. haha.

Shifty - Slide Along Side

One love one shot It's all we ever got Girl you got me started Now I'm not gonna stop Now slide along side yeah baby that's right I'm gonna show you the time of your life Oh girly girly come and dance with me Move that naughty body come close to me Now slide along side yeah baby that's right I'm gonna show you the time of your life This is it love It's what dreams are made of But its still up to us to feel the rush To pursue all the things only Gods can touch I wanna meet the odds with royal flush To fall I gave my all But it wasn't enough I'm never giving up I found life So I've gotta live it up And life is too short for war What can I say to show theres more With people slammin doors in my face and what for That aint the way to gain plays By making the same mistake day after day I gotta slide man get away the smile on my face its a sunny day girls and drinks and more drinks Come to think For such a big place its a small world For such a rat race i still got faith And anything goes still I got to say life has its ups and downs but I love it anyway One love one shot It's all we ever got Girl you got me started Now I'm not gonna stop Now slide along side yeah baby that's right I'm gonna show you the time of your life Oh girly girly come and dance with me Move that naughty body come close to me Now slide along side yeah baby that's right I'm gonna show you the time of your life Hey pretty girl pretty girl its on We gonna dance like boogie come on Do it all night long Let it go ain't no holding back now Gotta slide pretty baby that's right There's nothing I can't do with you by my side There's nowhere we can go that we wouldn't show 'em up I gotta have a type for destruction Livin life that's right She's daddy's little angel but she wasn't last night Now these are the breaks yeah baby that's right Now I got you, yeah I got you baby I want your body and you drive me crazy It's hard to resist such a sexy lady Come with me you'll have the time of your life You want to set the mood I guess the timing is right And it takes two to make a thing go right But what's it gonna take to take you home tonight One love one shot It's all we ever got Girl you got me started Now I'm not gonna stop Now slide along side yeah baby that's right I'm gonna show you the time of your life Oh girly girly come and dance with me Move that naughty body come close to me Now slide along side yeah baby that's right I'm gonna show you the time of your life You're gonna shine like a sunny day All you girls comin out and play If you want you can slide my way Let me hear you say heeeeyyy [Repeat x2] Sliiiiiidddddeeee...Oh Woah One love one shot It's all we ever got Girl you got me started Now I'm not gonna stop Now slide along side yeah baby that's right I'm gonna show you the time of your life Oh girly girly come and dance with me Move that naughty body come close to me Now slide along side yeah baby that's right I'm gonna show you the time of your life [Repeat x2]

wat's wrong w blogger. use paste smth. it jus comes out as a whole chunk. hah. this song is really nice. but e lyrics is shit. haha. but who cares. the tune rocks.

:::contemplated:::

history is repeating itself again. i shit hate it a lot. a lot. :::contemplated:::

totally screwed up my eng. so i can like just get full marks for my compre and compo. fantastic man. great job.

everything is turning me off.

i must study. i must study. i must study.

if only time can reverse. and i can be sec three once again.

:::contemplated:::

got back chi o's yesterday. was expecting a four or three. but yeah. just got lucky finally or smth. was a mixture of sweet and bitter. skipped tution. going tmr aft mock. hur... -shakes head- smth my dad said brought me really down. but yeah. wat's new with disappointments anyway. mum was nice though. haha.

watched twin effect. taking hl's advice and celebrate. ahha. was quite a suai day. tsk tsk. shalln't eleborate. travelled round and about and round and about. and ended up in ps. got tix. but yeah. got extra. guess it's b'cos of me or smth. shouldn't have went to e toilet. so sorry. 15 bucks for a dumb show. hah. it's not scary at all. kept luffing and luffing.. and e show's lame. but it's enhanced by gillien. (don't noe how to spell her name). but, yep. tt's abt all.

:::contemplated:::

i'm like jinxed on august the nine. wat's new anyway.

and i'm sick.

yes. i'm definately jinxed on august the nine. :::contemplated:::

sch celeberation. nat's day yest. was quite fun, i mean compare to youth day [which was a total shit], nat's was kinda fun. dressed up. ahha. have tiaria (did i spell it correctly), white shirt, w tis funky metallic red skirt. then. yep.. rach and rowena's managing well, so i'm not needed. hmm..

towned. too bad hl couldn't make it. waited for a while w hl for her mama and papa. miao, serp, jade went tanglin to catch mac' breakfast. hinched a ride fr jing. e 111 is like, damn packed. lido. ate long john's. apparently, jing and i were e oni pigs. la got stomach ache.

met jade, miao, serp. took neos. walked to ps. apparently it was too crowded. e village is like total hotcakes. mrt to cine. e same. then ya. jade's like all e time trying to murder me. hmph. shalln't eleborate... :P keep knocking and bumping and elbowing into me. hmm. guess i'm destined to be flat or smth. tsk tsk. cine basement. ta-ka. kino.

everyone's like bored. home. shud've gone to e toy fair heh. no one home. watched spirited away. dad home. mei home. then mum home. too bad heh. din meet my sis. she was at cine e same time as me.

:::contemplated:::

sch was alright. e maths was like hur. wat's new right. then. chem lab, was beyond words. it's simply agonizing. wacko did smth erm... ya. but it's quite bad. went bc to report the spoit gas tube.

a maths was a piece of shit. couldn't finish. if i got like five more mins, may have made it. but. still....

bio. janet lee. towned at ps. went sp first, la and miao bought funky red bra. tempted by the yellow sports, but ho.. it's not e material i want.

go buy e class national day crown. a bit too embarrassing. sat on e floor and counted like 43 crowns. then went ard in search of mr m's stuff. but dun have. got him a ward instead. but it's nice k. guess tmr, we'll all look like princesses. yeah. la was so nice. bought some tie hand things. yesss. then held up e whole queue cos we got like so much stuff. and the plastic bag was like too o-blang can. made a big fuss abt the plastic bag.

parted. miao took bus. crossed road and took bus w la. ok, she's like too nice. missed two buses to wait me. -beams- and maluated myself again. thought bus 14 was 16. then last min rush up, digging for my wallet. and holding the dumb bag in an awkard manner.. and it's bus 14. blehx. so malu. got so called confidence to carry the omg bag. la left first. then 16 came. guess wat. i look kind damn stupied w e crown. guess it's only for nice pple. hmph. oh did i mention. thr's tis guy hu's carrying a transparent plastic bag with a tulnip in it. ok. tt's like arh. and tt gave me confidence. someone can actually walk ard w those kind of things. too amusing. shalln't be mean. -winks-

:::contemplated:::

tis publishing thing like really is such a bother.

drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted drifted

apart.

:::contemplated:::

mega pissed now. yes. mega pissed. shalln't eleborate.

school was alright. bio test, lit test.. and clean class.

went far east eat ya kun w hailin, serp, laura, miao, jade, reb.

then macs to eat e 20 piece nuggets.  saw tis popular bunk.

maluated myself. argh. tis grp of ass were waving, and i happily tot he was hailin's pri sch friend or smth. then went and ask hailin if it's her friend. oh fine.. haha.  totally malu. wat's new right.

no mood to blog.

mega pissed.

:::contemplated:::

colours award was erm. alright i guess. the medal and all is nice, i mus admit. bored to death thr. plus e turn-off is e-maths one is jus standing behind me all e time. alright, reb shud noe hu's e turn off right. crapped a big deal w germaine.

stage. heard pple clapping. then e mc was like saying smth abt hold ur applauses to the end of smth. heh heh. my friends rock. :) :)

and i'm so upset. din eat e reception. all alone. met shuling. yeah, i grew taller.

class. showed off my medal man. :) jos tot it's gold. dream on.

msg. home. bath. eat. studied. eat. com.

sounds really boring heh.

 

:::contemplated:::

all i need is confidence.

Accidentally in love by counting crows. So she said what's the problem baby What's the problem I don't know Well maybe I'm in love (love) Think about it every time I think about it Can't stop thinking 'bout it How much longer will it take to cure this Just to cure it cause I can't ignore it if it's love (love) Makes me wanna turn around and face me but I don't know nothing 'bout love Come on, come on Turn a little faster Come on, come on The world will follow after Come on, come on Cause everybody's after love So I said I'm a snowball running Running down into the spring that's coming all this love Melting under blue skies Belting out sunlight Shimmering love Well baby I surrender To the strawberry ice cream Never ever end of all this love Well I didn't mean to do it But there's no escaping your love These lines of lightning Mean we're never alone, Never alone, no, no Come on, Come on Move a little closer Come on, Come on I want to hear you whisper Come on, Come on Settle down inside my love Come on, come on Jump a little higher Come on, come on If you feel a little lighter Come on, come on We were once Upon a time in love We're accidentally in love Accidentally in love (x7) Accidentally I'm In Love, I'm in Love, I'm in Love, I'm in Love, I'm in Love, I'm in Love, Accidentally (X 2) Come on, come on Spin a little tighter Come on, come on And the world's a little brighter Come on, come on Just get yourself inside her Love ...I'm in love

blehx. how come it's in a whole big chunk. lazy to space. neway, this song rocks. ;)

:::contemplated:::

cool. blogger changed the posting. Now, i'm like trying out every font to see which one is the best. think i'll settle for this. yes. this font is the nicest amg all. ;):):):

cool. blogger changed the posting. Now, i'm like trying out every font to see which one is the best. think i'll settle for this. yes. this font is the nicest amg all. ;):):):)

left eye was twitching very badly. discovered tt my scapular [ a pendent like brown necklace of jesus and mother mary] is missing. and hailin was so nice.  i love her to bits. hehheh.

was so ripped of by the ''da jui ba''. a totally turn off man. yucks!

:::contemplated:::

Vindicated Hope dangles on a string Like slow spinning redemption Winding in and winding out The shine of which has caught my eye And roped me in So mesmerizing, so hypnotizing I am captivated [Chorus] I am Vindicated I am selfish I am wrong I am right I swear I'm right I swear I knew it all along And I am flawed But I am cleaning up so well I am seeing in me now the things you swore you saw yourself So clear Like the diamond in your ring Cut to mirror your intentions Oversized and overwhelmed The shine of which has caught my eye And rendered me so isoloated, so motivated I am certain now that [Chorus] So turn Up the corners of your lips Part them and feel my finger tips Trace the moment, fall forever Defense is paper thin Just one touch and I'd be in Too deep now to ever swim against the current So let me slip away [3x] So let me slip against the current and let me slip away [4x] [Chorus] Slight hope It dangles on a string Like slow spinning redemption... i love this song so much. I am Vindicated I am selfish I am wrong I am right I swear I'm right I swear I knew it all along for survival, it is sadly necessary. :::contemplated:::

i'm sorry. as the loney wolf howls. :::contemplated:::

chi oral was jus a wreck. was totally crying aft it. all the hardwork put in in reading so much of e hao zhuo wen is jus nothing. yeah. tt's wat always happens anyway. no matter how hard you try. things are jus not wat it seems. so much for my happy ending. :::contemplated:::

in case u're wondering why i changed my url again. it's dumb. cos i helped my sis to create a new blog. and i stupidly went to add the two hi-phan for her. so it's like e same as e -iamhappy- and when she types her url, my will appear too. and then.. she can conveniently come and visit me as well. pok right. :::contemplated:::

i've got a yellow flying balloon. it's like flying, but by tmr it'll be dead. named it :yellow. find, i know u're tinking tt i'm mad or smth. to remember my dead hamster, yellow, wat. it's like my favourite. all those that we're built up are now all gone.:::contemplated:::

my com is like hur. extremely slow. but, it's ok. i appreciate you. lame. youth day celebration was a big piece of shit. hur hur. it's like dumb and dumber.. aft tt discovered tt the class was locked. went to and fro to e sch servant to get the keys. got w miao, then run back. cos lao shi using classroom, so went back to tell the auntie. then went back to class, to get e keys to return e auntie. jade was so nice, helped to bring it thr.. then was so tired, so slowly walk thr. heh. took bus to gr8t world. everyone going town, but we're like. wat r we doing thr anyway. went to eat the sunken muffin. nice leh. and obvious, the greedy hailin love it cos it's so sweet and chocolatey.. heh. i like it too oso lah. experimented w the tea bag. tis tupid jade, keep on obsturcting w my investigation. hah. home. at the bus, suddenly discovered tt jade's frontview hair looks like tis shuai guy in K-one. fine. luffing again rigt. jade was disgusted- as usual. heheh. told them abt e cut toy tt i saw in daimaru. so cute. :::contemplated:::

my left ear is really really pain. shall not elaborate. hur hur. :::contemplated:::

watched the best bet yest. watched a lot of shows lately. tink 5 shows, since aft e midyrs. blechx. jack neo shows r getting boring. breaking the habit Memories consume Like opening the wound I'm picking me apart again You all assume I'm safe here in my room Unless I try to start again [Bridge:] I don't want to be the one The battles always choose 'Cause inside I realize That I'm the one confused [Chorus:] I don't know what's worth fighting for Or why I have to scream I don't know why I instigate And say what I don't mean I don't know how I got this way I know it's not alright So I'm breaking the habit I'm breaking the habit Tonight Clutching my cure I tightly lock the door I try to catch my breath again I hurt much more Than anytime before I had no options left again [Bridge:] I dont want to be the one The battles always choose 'Cause inside I realize That I'm the one confused [Chorus:] I don't know what's worth fighting for Or why I have to scream I don't know why I instigate And say what I don't mean I don't know how I got this way I'll never be alright So, I'm breaking the habit I'm breaking the habit Tonight [Bridge:] I'll paint it on the walls 'Cause I'm the one at fault I'll never fight again And this is how it ends [Chorus:] I don't know what's worth fighting for Or why I have to scream But now I have some clarity to show you what I mean I don't know how I got this way I'll never be alright So, I'm breaking the habit I'm breaking the habit I’m breaking the habit Tonight dun ask me why. i jus like tis song. :::contemplated:::

watched ard e world in 80 days. yup. it's kinda nice, three stars. haha. oh, and e woman's eyes are totally chio. and her hair is nice as well. everything is nice, except, her teeth. heh. and wang fei hong is in e show as well. lame or not. and still got some 10 tigers legend, and a chinese general fang. who's mo wen hui, and supposed to be e bad guy trying to steal passportu(jackie chan) jade buddha. did i spell it correctly? hur. :::contemplated:::

Bai Hu - Tiger! Mythological Background: The tiger is associated
with strength and the desire for a challenge.
It is also associated with hope to win, or
rather, the blooming season. It is also linked
to meandering, or the ability to be in contact
with a lot of aspects. The tiger also stands
for war and soldiers fighting to the end, for
the sake of their country.

Which Chinese Mythological Being Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla seriously, i kinda wana be a tiger when i was young. heh.lameo. :::contemplated:::

somehow i jus managed to screw up a complete perfect day. wat's new anyway. sigh. :::contemplated:::

Lonliness dominates you. You can hide it well, but
its there, and your friends can see it. You
constantly feel alone, and need to do things to
fill your time. Your afraid to tell people
this, but sooner or later it gets out in a bad
way, and you think you screwed up everything.
And when you are in love is when you are sad
the most. (Please Vote)

What Emotion Dominates you?
brought to you by Quizilla very. :::contemplated:::

wow wow, guess what. my father actually bought a discman for me. haha.. he couldn't stand me borrowing his all e time. so he's got no choice but to get me one. although it's some pok brand tt i've nv heard bfor.. but at least it's still smth rigt..-grins- my sis was like sososososososo jealous. ya. it's suppose to be for my b'day..so yup. ;) k..i sound like a bitch here. hah..omg.. :::contemplated:::

come to think of it. the major turnoff is not exactly a major turnoff. went thro e memories and discovered tt she's still a very nice gal. a nice gal who's always getting on pple's nerves. ha. ok. she's nice. yes. tt's right. :::contemplated:::

You have a Lost Soul. No one is really sure what
that can always mean, because it can be defined
in many ways. As Legend goes, lost souls were
the spirits of passed away people who are
neither in heaven nor hell. They walk the
earth, brooding mysteriously, always appearing
when you expect it least. So hence, if you have
a Lost Soul, then you are probably very
insecure and shy. Stuck in your own little box,
you watch the world fly by as a loner. You dont
know your place. You seemingly dont have a
place in society or an interest. You are a very
capricious person, and are confused and
frustrated about where you belong. You crave
for the sense and feeling of home-but have not
obtained it yet.

What Kind of SOUL do you posses? (For Girls only) Incredible Anime Pictures!
brought to you by Quizilla great. :::contemplated:::

met aidi yesterday. changed quite a freaking bit. i mean, when she walked towards us, i culd't even recognise her. grew taller, slimmer, and with a slang that serping and i found extremely hard to catch. heh. talk abt poor english. went town, she's gota get her sis Pri 1 maths bk, and yep. far east. serping went royal sporting hse to c her nike slevesless-t. e yellow and grey is so nicccee. both my colours...hah. to think these two clashing colours actually matches so well.. but, she din buy it.. hur.. ya, far east, serping wants ta cut her hair bfor she goes indo, which is today. now she shud be somewhr thr.. and as usual, they're busy!! when everyone's jus slacking ard. hur. decided tt it's really bad attitude. blechx. took neos w huiwen,aidi,serp.. kinda fun. heh. jus tt we look a bit too fair in e photos.heh. huiwen and aidi took card..and yep.. after tt.. we're off. serping took cab coz she's late.. and home. ate e dick fishcake. hah. jealous? :::hopeful:::

the strong gets angry and calls the shots. resulting in recklessness due to hot-temperness. in the end. it's just silent tears. the weak just controls and contains. suffering humiliation and undescribleable sorrow. in the end. does it really matter. it's just silent tears. Sister is a bitch. i've never seen anyone as bitchy as her. your day will come. the more you contemplate the more doubts you'll have. the more doubts your'll have the more unsure you'll get. the more unsure you'll get, the more insecure you'll feel. the more insecure you'll feel, the more doubts you'll have. the more doubts you'll have, it's time for bed. and sleeping full of doubts will sure give you a quizzical dream. :::contemplated:::

not that it was a choice. -looks down- pms :::hopeful:::

don't regret buying the evanessence CD at all. seriously nice. ;) somehow or rather, don't ask me why. i'm just stuck with this song. TOURNIQUET I tried to kill the pain, But only brought more. (So much more) I'm dying, And I'm pouring, crimson regret, and betrayal. I'm dying, Praying, Bleeding, Screaming. Am I too lost to be saved ? Am I too lost ? My God! My Tourniquet, Return to me salvation. My God! My Tourniquet, Return to me salvation. Do you remember me ? Lost for so long. Will you be on the other side ? Will you forgive me ? I'm dying, Praying, Bleeding, Screaming. Am I too lost to be saved ? Am I too lost ? My God! My Tourniquet, Return to me salvation. My God! My Tourniquet, Return to me salvation. (Return to me salvation) (I want to die!) My God! My Tourniquet, Return to me salvation. My God! My Tourniquet, Return to me salvation. My wounds cry for the grave. My soul cries, for deliverance. Will I be denied ? Christ! Tourniquet! My suicide. i don't know why. but somehow i just like it. life rocks anyway. :::hopeful:::

i've finally convinced her that i don not need the ss tution. now. i'm signed up for a speed reading course, because my reading speed is too slow. yes. everything is just for me. sometimes, i feel that she's taking results so seriously that it's too much. and all the time i've failed to produce results. honestly, i appreciate everything. but sometimes, i wish that i can just live my life as if it's my own. i'm happy with whatever i achieve. and whatever i do, i look, I AM. but always, it's not this way. i'm sorry for being dumb. it's now a choice anyway. let me go. :::hopeful:::

mum is getting me to go for some fucked up social studies tution. and it starts at 6.30 to who noes who time. means, after sch, chem remedial to like 4.30-5. then, S.S tution fr 6.30 to 8 or smth. then travel home. 8.30. eat dinner. 9.00 then study and do hw. and study for watever test e next day. and sleep like..who knows what time. so if i go ahead and fail all my subjects, does that mean that i must go tution for everything. social studies? absurd. :::hopeful:::

the day after tomorrow is really the best movie i've watched so far after maybe? harry potter. omg, it's really extremely rockingrockingrocking! the plot and all the stuff is really extremely nice cum nice. and plus the visual and sound effects, it really freaks me out. i mean. just imagine. the sea changed it's current, and we're like all flooded underwater. ok, so wat if we survived. then the snow, and all, the whole city totally froze. yes. froze. omg! the visuals are really can make it.-screams- and plus all e lovey-douvvy. really. extremely touching. the part about the wolves. my heart almost jumped out. and when i look at rebecca, she was totally like me. covering ourselves up. everything was so freaking nice!!! i mean if i'm gona rate it. i'll rate it five stars. and even e pok hailin who was unwilling to was considered giving it 4and e half stars. ok, i sound like so director promoting e movie. but, those who havn't watched it yet.. WATCH NOW! tink i screwed up my compo. shaln't talk abtit. :::hopeful:::

life is beautiful, but i hate it. :::hopeful::: heh, now she's against e odds, not us.

we got back mid year results today. honestly it was bad. yeah. the world is bias against us. people who are really hardworking and work really really hard did not seem to get what they are supposed to. people who did not work as hard excel. sometimes, or rather most of the time, life is unfair. it's heartbreaking to see people crying yet trying to be strong. amusing to see people happy but yet trying to be sad just to compromise those who are upset. people who celebrate, praise the lord, and shout "yes". and frustrating to hear people say i've only got an A2, when you got a C. and really weird to see different people crying and laughing at the same exact place. and people trying to beg for marks that will make them jump a grade. and people getting all upset and uptight just because they lost to a friend. yes. but despite of all these.. the world is still beautiful. cos' at least no matter what you're facing. you still have a friend with you. at least... the world is bias. i am a hermit. :::hopeful::: jos,serp and i are going to top the class. at least. try. and miao:get well soon!

we're living in self-denial. living in a hermitage, where the three hermits live. locked out and isolated from the world, where wild bores and cattles roam. eating spiders and caterpilliars, and bird shit with bird urine as sauce, and wearing leaves as clothes, and not dirtying it coz we've got to pick new leaves, and have have crickets creak, and pattle rain as entertainments, and the hourglass and sun dial as time seekers. the outcasts of the society, where no one bothers about you, with a new fat wild bore as the cute little pet. popping the head out of the hermit cave when while sheeps and lambs knock on the stonny door. and stealing potatoes and evapourating rainwater. From a royal princess to a lowly class xia den hermit, who can only see royal people not eating their fries and coke, and yet do nothing except to stare at the fries. A SHUT UP, and yes, we will obey. we're really very very very sorry for causing so much inconvience. it's all our fault. we've all living in self-denial. in our dearest one and only.. HERMITAGE :::hopeful::: maybe i shud just go living somewhere like that, talk about a home.

No one knows what it’s like To be the bad man To be the sad man Behind blue eyes And no one knows What it’s like to be hated To be faded to telling only lies But my dreams they aren’t as empty As my conscious seems to be I have hours, only lonely My love is vengeance That’s never free No one knows what its like To feel these feelings Like I do, and I blame you! No one bites back as hard On their anger None of my pain woe Can show through But my dreams they aren’t as empty As my conscious seems to be I have hours, only lonely My love is vengeance That’s never free Discover L.I.M.P say it (x4) No one knows what its like To be mistreated, to be defeated Behind blue eyes No one know how to say That they’re sorry and don’t worry I’m not telling lies But my dreams they aren’t as empty As my conscious seems to be I have hours, only lonely My love is vengeance That’s never free No one knows what its like To be the bad man, to be the sad man Behind blue eyes. [Hidden Track] In them clothes All the grey I'll stay if you go away Concrete, tall as the sky Movement passing me by And you blush, what a rush Reminisce, cold crush Next door, ear to the wind All the tension made for the core I wish, I wish, I wish it was all that easy I wish, I wish, I wish it was all that easy :::hopeful:::

i've got earrings! :::hopeful:::

shit. damnit shit. you lost your freak temper at the damnit bitch and what.. out of a sudden jus blow every fucked up shit at me when i was jus quietly sitting thr reading and fucked.. WAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO. i jus got ripped off for nothing.. it's my hair ok.. and for nothing i jus got scolded to ripped off your damnit anger..and get jus fucked up picked on for no fucking reason.. shit you all.. HELLO! IT'S MY HAIR.. HOW MUCH I HATE OWNING PEOPLE FOR A LIVING! shit it shit it shit it.. and both the bitch and her are jus best of frens together.. and i've been ostracized. fucked.. okok.. at least i got my father.. somewhr watching tv.. fucked. :::hopeful:::or wat

wow..blogger actually changed so much..heh.. exams r over..and eveything is plain shit.. and grad night is at hillton* took triple one and got a shock of my life when i saw it.. wat's this.. how come grad nite at such a xia den place! e design is like pok. and e windows of the hotel r like turing brown and falling off anytime.. e ambience is like kana sai.. ok..maybe e interior is nice.. but wj said tt..it's as shit..hurhur..wat's tis! went take neos at herren.. then went cine.. orchard flooded w crescentians.. went take neos at cene.. but e damn machine broke down.. we're like shit.. were taking so many photos..over and over.. we're pratically taking like for ard 15mis?? and e woman came and said tt e machine broke down.. like derder.. and e workers r damn attitude..perz.. dun ever go thr.. jus get urself pissed.. home.. btw..ava farewell party.. was really pathe..but it's alright lah..heh.. :):):):):) :::hopeful:::

drift drift drift dirft drift drift drift drift drift drift drift drift drift drift drift dirft drift drift drift drift drift drift drift drift drift drift drift dirft drift drift drift drift drift drift drift drift drift drift drift dirft drift drift drift drift drift drift drift drift drift drift drift dirft drift drift drift drift drift drift drift drift drift drift drift dirft drift drift drift drift drift drift drift drift drift drift drift dirft drift drift drift drift drift drift drift drift drift drift drift dirft drift drift drift drift drift drift drift drift drift drift drift dirft drift drift drift drift drift drift drift drift apart iam lame today. :::hopeful:::

6121523518 is my major turnoff! bitch. :::hopeful:::

sports day was arh-meh.. hah.. somehow boon and i ended up in front cheering.. hah... plus we dun even noe e cheers.. so just shout shout lah..heh.. then tis jade..got nothing to say abt her.. din come in front and help still luff and roll her eyes..hah.. opps..thousand gold oso har..hehehe.. oral was erpz..messed up or wat.. mdm kwan wasn't even interested on listening to me talk.. all e time looking ard.. then halfway thro e conversation.. go talk to lydia.. end up..hur hur.. i dun noe wat to say liao..and i oni got 6 for tt topic..hurhur.. eng was ok lah.. except e funny incident whr i misinterpreted mrs rupa's qns abt.. "where do you think this is" go tell her all sorts of things except tt it's a farm..hur! nice nice song when i heard last sunday during mass.. to live is to die and to laugh is to cry to live is to love with all your heart to live is to walk and to talk in your word to live is to sing in your love :::smothered:::

omg!! R and B came... although their singing and dance really can't make it.. but!!! zai zai and meng ru!!!! argh.. hui and i were like at e foyer.. then they all walked pass us.. somemore waving leh.. them we jus tupidly wave back.. for a split second tot of dashing forward to let them sign... but..heng lah. look at her face.. ARGH! :::smothered:::

R&B coming to crescent! yeah.. zaizai!!! .:Reminisce the past Treasure the present Hope for the future:. :::smothered::: .:the past still haunts the present still shuns the future still daunts:.

went back to school for emaths mock test.. tink i'm gona flunk like some crazy duck.. dun tink i even did enuf to pass.. went roaming ard w jade and miao.. culdn't decide whr to go.. went mobile.. then back to sch.. then to e com. lab.. got shooed by mr m..hurhur.. saw "eye candy"..heh.. went to play w e piano.. really envy thoes who's able to play e instrument.. miao taught me how to play twinkle² lit star.. i'm like some dumb duck.. kept on forgetting e keys.. and guess wat.. it's oni twinkle² lit stars.. hur.. then..went class.. w laura..and yep.. home.. if we don't admire the things around you, how are you even going to appreciate life... :::smothered:::

dear miao ling wrote a book for me.. although it's oni like 3 pgs.. but tks truckloads!heeheh.. it's lent and i'm nice to pple.. -ok..i noe u're rolling you eyes..- he who banishes a sword will in turn be destoryed by it :::smothered:::

today is a nice day.. yeah! cos tay huiling din come..ha.. lessons as usual.. recess as usual.. everything's as usual.. until tis reb, miao, laura, cindy.. come and off e toilet lights.. and closed e toilet doors.. leaving me in e haunted toilet! totally freaked out when i was washing my hands.. and discovered tt i can see e glom overview of e eeire toilet.. -screams!- but for once, reb was so nice..haha.. apologised..hah.. oh.. miao's actually fretting over getting a new english name..hur..haha.. in e end chose tis nice nice name tt so coincidentally tt everyone w tis name are small and got cute look..haha.. ordinary eyes* got cms today.. then.. wrote some shit compo.. abt meeting an old fren.. tink jade nearly flipped off her chair when she was reading my compo..haha.. i mean.. wat else can bloodclot do.. send me for EEC? shit..din tink of it.. :::smothered:::

look at e time now.. and poor small eyes and me are still doing the freaking geo project.. toin.. k.. just type to make you people feel guilty.. but i seriously doubt you will... sigh :::smothered:::

whee! i am a happy girl today! hehheh! miaoling ROCKS!!! (inside joke) anyway.. went town.. to get geo things.. but din.. in e end at e shooms burger.. then did e stall planning.. went to e orchard OG to get smth for my dear hatseller.. haha.. i tink u're like it..! whee... i'm a happy girl... :::smothered:::

father hates mother mother hates father sometimes.. it's actually quite amazing to hear they bad mouth about each other.. they adults but get angry over small matters.. shows traces of childishness.. it shows: no matter how old you grow.. u're still a child at heart..haha.. just got overselves into some shit again.. sigh :::smothered:::

YOU HAVE NO RIGHTS TO CONDEMN OTHERS.. UNLESS YOU KNOW WHAT IS ACTUALLY GOING ON.. great.. i know you're rolling your eyes at me

yesterday was really quite rocking.. went to sch.. discovered tt com lab closed.. took cab..w jade, and hL.. to her hse.. did e eng thing.. then tis hl so doudd.. hah.. dun noe how to connect her wire.. and jade and i as doud oso dun noe.. until smarty serping came.. heeh.. reb came like goodnessly late... went pick jos and miao at busstop.. jos really har.. cannot make it.. haha.. i mean diet.. 1st eat low-fat icecream..which wasn't really low fat after all. then eat yakun bread.. totally refuse to spare one piece for miao.. say muz return her 40cents..haaa.. until we trick her... whahaha.. rushed to sch w jade.. hai jade cannot eat her waffer.. heh.. then.. do all e shit.. and finally pizza.. yup.. after sooooo long.. crezawards finally began.. all e cheers and everything.. and i got walkie-talkie..haha.. tks to hui and wj.. -toin- but really fun!hee.. e starting part curtains keep open and close wrongly.. but not our fault k.. e pple cheered too much.. then yup.. siyu and i went up to guide e sec3 for e fusion one.. bit disappointed tt they din win.. then break.. do e same stuff.. ahha.. saw chio bu..hee... getting sexier..untilcannot.. heh.. a moment of happiness.. crap.. then.. all singing.. then finally e dance. bring me to life.. haha.. siyu and i went up again..whee.. din really have much of a planning.. but.. turned out to be a success! yeah.. e final part..damn comic.. tis siyu accidently sat on e curtains control.. and it just opened.. then.. reavealing e singers and everything.. opps.. but was alright..coz tis guest was singing.. so yup.. juz played along.. smart ass.. ahah.. then.. e giving of price.. oh.. farhana... won vocals.. expected..hah.. frosted sounds won group vocals.. and.. e hungama..and e bring me to life dance.. won e dance cat! yeah.. and oh.. geradine damn sweet.. yup.. expected e gal won e compare cat.. but e thing is tt.. ava damn bu shuang w bloodclot.. coz she thanked everyone even art club.. and neglected ava again.. and geradine was like "and thank you all the ava crew" haha.. sweet gal.. muz have heard us complaining.. no of grps who thanked us..: 1) fusion (sham and vic) 2) tis big size malay gal..haha.. sweet gal.. 3) geradine of course.. 4) and bond..(the SHE group.. all e time apologizing.. esp vera.. non-stop telling us sorry..hah..) and tt's all??!!!! ha.. how unappreciative pple are nowadays..hiz.. but it still rocks.. life rocks.. when there are still some nice people among us.. hah.. i love crezawards! :::smothered:::

whee.. sarah maclachan got album.. called falling flow or smth.. jus heard it fr e tv.. nearly died today.. mr m's strob light is mad.. i really tink that it's short circuit... then when i touch it rigt.. then i can really feel e electric current going up my index finger.. to my hand.. to my arm.. then.. luckily i realised tt i was electricuited.. immediately let go of it.. so scary.. then i dun dare to touch it.. omg.. tink i scream so loudly tt e whole stage can hear.. omg... v scary leh.. hey. whoever who's reading tis.. e next time u c me muz remind me to tell mr m tt e strob light is short circuit.. if not e next person who meddle w it me oso be shock.. should have noticed e frayed wires.. :::smothered:::

if only eveyone is equal.. no one gets more, no one gets less.. no one is treated better, no one is treated worse.. no one is happier, no one is sadder.. everything is equal.. everybody is the same.. if only one day this will happen.. i'll be a miracle.. :::smothered:::

whee.. next time i wan to work in e forensic dept.. -grins- work as those pple who analyse evidence in e crime scene.. analyse blood samples in murder.. semen in rape cases.. etc etc.. cool until cannot! haha.. i'm sick.. ha.. inspired by e surgeon.. so much on forensic tt now i wana work in forensic.. yeah! who noes.. next time i'll be cutting people apart..haha.. ok.. stop it.. getting guresome.. iamhappy today! :::smothered:::

Fallen Sarah McLachlan Heaven bent to take my hand And lead me through the fire Be the long awaited answer To a long and painful fight Truth be told I've tried my best But somewhere along the way I got caught up in all there was to offer And the cost was so much more than I could bear Though I've tried, I've fallen... I have sunk so low I have messed up Better I should know So don't come round here And tell me I told you so... We all begin with good intent Love was raw and young We believed that we could change ourselves THe past could be undone But we carry on our backs the burden Time always reveals The lonely light of morning The wound that would not heal It's the bitter taste of losing everything That I have held so dear. I've fallen... I have sunk so low I have messed up Better I should know So don't come round here And tell me I told you so... Heaven bent to take my hand Nowhere left to turn I'm lost to those I thought were friends To everyone I know Oh they turned their heads embarassed Pretend that they don't see But it's one missed step You'll slip before you know it And there doesn't seem a way to be redeemed Though I've tried, I've fallen... I have sunk so low I have messed up Better I should know So don't come round here And tell me I told you so... you're better with them, you go.. you go with them.. so what do you all expect me to do. stuck no where or what. i quit :::smothered:::

went so many places.. walked until our legs sore liao.. bugis... to e pasar malum.. which's no longer thr.. then e guan yin miao.. then little india.. tiring.. :::smothered:::

THE SURGEON Tess Cerritsen The connection bewteen blood and life has been known since the dawn of man. The ancients did not know that blood is made in the marrow, or that most of it is merely water, but they did appreciate its power in ritual and sacrifice. The Aztecs used bone perforators and agave needles to pierce their own skin and draw blood. They poked holes through their lips or tongue or the flesh of their chest, and the blood that resulted was their personal offering to the gods. Today such self-multilation would be called sick and grotesque, the hallmark of insanity. I wonder what the Aztecs would think of us. :::smothered:::

it just rained... ha.. guess i'm getting into the rainnning mood... but e monsoon is ending by next week.. means no more rain.. ;( NAIL IN THE FENCE There once was a little boy who had a bad temper. His Father gave him a bag of nails and told him that every time he lost his temper, he must hammer a nail into the back of the fence. The first day the boy had driven 37 nails into the fence. Over the next few weeks, as he learned to control his anger, the number of nails hammered daily gradually dwindled down. He discovered it was easier to hold his temper than to drive those nails into the fence. Finally the day came when the boy didn't lose his temper at all. He told his father about it and the father suggested that the boy now pull out one nail for each day that he was able to hold his temper. The days passed and the young boy was finally able to tell his father that all the nails were gone. The father took his son by the hand and led him to the fence. He said, "You have done well, my son, but look at the holes in the fence. The fence will never be the same. When you say things in anger, they leave a scar just like this one. You can put a knife in a man and draw it out. It won't matter how many times you say I'm sorry, the wound is still there. " A verbal wound is as bad as a physical one. :::smothered:::

ran in the rain with miao.. hee hee.. havn't been doing tt since so long ago.. miao.. u rock..haha.. although i still disagree tt u use a toilet paper to clean ur pretty face.. chem lesson's getting fr bad to worse... and now.. i'm starting to dread it.. dinhave chem remedial.. cancelled..and we sillily went and waited till 3.15 goodness.. dance like no one is looking at you. love like you've never been hurt before. sing like no can is hearing you. live like heaven is on earth. ~souza :::smothered:::

live life to the fullest.. :::smothered:::

THE PASSION OF THE CHRIST Maybe the world has become numbed by so much senseless information, cruelty and meaningless imagery, it needs to be brutally bludgeoned to get a reaction-- like a clinically depressed person who cuts himself constantly with a razor just to prove he can still feel something. ~ONG SOH CHIN :::smothered:::

:::smothered:::

discovered smth really shocking yest.. can't imaging it.. but... shall not eleborate.. wait kana bash.. as usual..disappointed w e idiotic emaths.. crap.. pple keep saying tt it's hard and evryting.. but e fact is tt oni a handful failed.. and i'm one of them.. as usual.. got scolded.. got demoralized.. got put down.. got grounded.. but.. e tink is tt... unreasonable accusations.. unreasonable demands.. unreasonable criticism.. but tis time i din argue.. just listened.. and try to forget watever.. wat's e use of brooding over it.. wat's e use of arguing.. it all comes back to the square one.. i'm in the wrong.. :::smothered:::

yucks.. i simply can't stand you.. will you stop being so fucking unreasonable.. ok.. when you feel like talking.. you come and irritate us by talking nonsense.. if not you act smart and say tt wat i'm studying is just very easy.. blah blah blah.. and when i'm studying for a test.. u ask me to do shitted things like coming all the way out of my room to off the fan for you.. when people are sleeping.. u bang the doors.. on the tv loudly.. without any consideration at all.. but when u're taking ur nap..blah blah.. u expect pple to keep extremely quiet and even scold when e phone rings.. it's not only u.. e whole family really tinks tt u're too much.. and when it's so late at nigt.. and u suddenly asked for help.. i even bothered to help you.. but guess wat.. all i got is ur funking scoldings tt i don't deserve.. how'll i noe abt wat internet proxy and stuff.. and pls dun touch all e internet links.. when evr u acted smart.. and meddle w it.. i'll have a hard time repairing e crashed com. and it's not tt i dun wana teach u or wat k.. e true is tt i really don't noe anything abt e functioning abt e com. muz u shout so loudly.. and kept saying how stupid i am.. ok so wat i'm stupid.. u're worse.. and it's not tt i'm proud or arrogrant.. e fact is tt i dunevn noe it myself.. and u go yank yank yank.. and muz you shout.. can just announce to e whole neighbourhood tt i'm stupid.. haha.. and m tinks i deserve it.. screw.. and when i come home.. u can just totally ruin my mood for scolding me for touching ur fucking toto things.. like i'll every lay my fingers on ur filthy stuff.. all u care abt is just u and urself.. just get lost... u've no idea tt all these cause me to HATE you even more.. just get it straight.. wateva u say.. i shall not bother... coz it no longer has any value to me.. it's just junk and shit.. tt's not worth bothering.. ok.. i'm not e only one.. even my sis tinks so.. so shut up.. -guess e next thing i noe.. i'm struck by e lightning..- but i can't help it.. i just can't stand you .. screw off.. and tks for e comment tt i'm stupid.. it adds on to my inferiority.. :::smothered:::

Your an ice dragon! Congrats! Out of all the
dragons, you are most powerful but do not like
to show it. A rare and special creture, you
have artistic style and are great at expressing
yourself. You think friends and Familly are the
most important, and are a hopeless romantic.
But of course, as ice goes, you can be a little
cold or harsh at times. But not to worry, you
always apoligize later!

What elemental dragon are you?
brought to you by Quizilla
¨ßB¨ßB939fc8)

"Which Kingdom Hearts Character Are You?"
brought to you by Quizilla opps... tt's like not v true.. but.. ha.. nice pic.. Hey dad look at me. Think back and talk to me Did I grow up according to plan? And do you think I'm wasting my time... Doing things I wanna do But it hurts when you disapprove all along. And now I try hard to make it I just want to make you proud I'm never gonna be good enough for you I can't pretend that I'm alright And you can't change me Cuz we lost it all Nothing lasts forever I'm sorry I can't be perfect Now it's just too late And we can't go back I'm sorry I can't be perfect I try not to think About the pain I feel inside Did you know you used to be my hero? All the days you spent with me Now seem so far away And it feels like you don't care anymore And now I try hard to make it I just want to make you proud I'm never gonna be good enough for you I can't stand another fight And nothing's alright Cuz we lost it all Nothing lasts forever I'm sorry I can't be perfect Now it's just too late And we can't go back I'm sorry I can't be perfect Nothing's gonna change the things that you said Nothing's gonna make this right again Please don't turn your back I can't believe it's hard just to talk to you But you don't understand Cuz we lost it all Nothing lasts forever I'm sorry I can't be perfect Now it's just too late And we can't go back I'm sorry I can't be perfect Cuz we lost it all Nothing lasts forever I'm sorry I can't be perfect Now it's just too late And we can't go back I'm sorry I can't be perfect :::smothered:::

i'm still regretting it.. :::smothered:::

i'm never gona step into chinatown again.. that disgusting place.. with uncilivised people.. yucks... ok.. except one... but... pls... the place sucks... screw... :::smothered:::

maybe i shouldn't care about what your'll say.. shouldn't take your words seiously.. and just do what i desire.. at least i won't regret so much.. :::smothered::: just leave me alone.. get off my back.. i can't stand peeking behind me.. to see if you people are invading my privacy.. and looking at wat i'm typing.. and asking me about it.. just ostracise me will you.. Come clean Hilary Duff Let's go back Back to the beginning Back to when the earth, the sun, the stars all aligned 'Cause perfect didn't feel so perfect Trying to fit a square into a circle Was no lie I defy [CHORUS:] Let the rain fall down And wake my dreams Let it wash away My sanity 'Cause I wanna feel the thunder I wanna scream Let the rain fall down I'm comimg clean, I'm coming clean I'm shedding Shedding every color Trying to find a pigment of truth Beneath my skin 'Cause different Doesn't feel so different And going out is better Then always staying in Feel the wind [CHORUS] I'm coming clean Let the rain fall Let the rain fall I'm coming clean [CHORUS] Let's go back Back to the beginning

A- Age: 15 plus. B- Birth Date: 11/8/1988 C- Chore you hate: housework D- Did it before: hur? E- Essential make up item: like nothing leh F- Favorite popstar: no favourites.. but dido is nice.. G- Girlfriend: how i wish... H- Hometown: Singapore. I- Instruments you play: guzhen.. haha.. i noe u're luffing J- Job title: student K- Kids: nope.. i'm single dear.. L- Living arrangements: HDB M- Menstration: erm.. i hate it.. N- Number of times you yawn in a day: depends O- Overnight hospital stays: none. P- Phobia: cockroach Q- Quote you like to say: har? repeat.. R- Regular drink: water S- Secret crush: it's a secret.. duh.. T- Time you wake up: schdays.. 6.10am U- Unique habit: can't find anything uniqure abt myself V- Vegetable you refuse to eat: i love vegetables! W- Worst habit: speak before i think X- X-rays you've had: once or twice? Y- Yummy food you make: erm.. maggie mee... i'm serious.. my sis said tt it's nice.. Z- Zodiac sign: leo Last cigarette: they suck... Last kiss: can't remember.. Last good cry: last year.. Last library book checked out: last mth--january.. Last crush: *her Last phone call: to my mum.. to tell her tt i'm home.. haha.. Last TV show watched: dunnoe wat's e title.. ony watched while hanging e clothes wat.. Last showered: just Last shoes worn: new balance Last cd played: i dunhave any cds to play to start off w.. Last item bought: uncle ice cream.. haha Last downloaded: years ago... Last chatted with: jade Last weird encounter: can't rem Last ice cream eaten: the uncle ice cream one lah Last chair sat in: sch chair i guess Last scolded by: my mum Last seen by: my father.. yucks.. Last shitted: yesterday. Last sex: N.A Last eaten: a fruit teller sweet i tink.. Last clothes worn: crez- U Last fight: with myself Last person you miss: *her Last person you hugged: miaoling Last person you kissed: tink last year... Last person you want: i want? Last thing you wanna do: be alone.. yuckss... just tot of coming home early to be alone.. and guess wat.. my father and his fren is home.. creep... look how my day is ruin.. :::smothered:::

whatever it is.. it's just over :::smothered:::

why is it like that.. no matter what.. everything just turns ard and becomes my fault again.. why can't you understand me.. why can't you understand my situation.. do you think i really have a choice.. when everyone is asking me not to go.. do you think i can just say "no" and go ahead.. do you think i have a choice and do it my way when they're all objecting.. why can't you understand what's peer pressure.. why must you always make me feel so bad.. make me so depressed.. make me see that i'm always the one in the wrong no matter what.. why must you tell me that you hate me so much.. why must you tell me that the reason you sent me home is that you don't want to see me.. why must you tell me that i'm a bad sister.. why must you all always misunderstand me.. it's not that i don't want to study.. it's not that i want to have a relax life.. it's not that i didn't try to solve the fucking maths problem for her... can't you just let me have a bit of self esteem.. must you ruin every bit that i've built up.. must you force me to hate myself so much.. or do you all just take pleasure in it.. you've pushed me into the habit again.. now.. i just don't wana stop.. :::smothered:::

screwed.. if i can feel it.. wouldn't she feel it too... oh screwed!!!!!! where ever you go.. whatever you do.. i'll be right here waiting for you.. whatever it takes.. or how my heart breaks.. i'll be right here waiting for you.. :::smothered:::

it rained...yeah.. i'm happy.. got a bit screwed up... tink hui hui will start tinking tt i'm some psyco-mad person.. hhaha... everytime you sigh.. you'll killing an angel.. ok... i'll stop sighing... and be happy! it's once again.. caught btw two sides.. should i or should i not... life is nothing but a facade...:::smothered:::

have you ever been caught in a dilemma.. that both wys are simply wrong paths.. yet you have to choose one no matter one.. one path leds to guilt... yet it's seemed e only way out.. the other path is a clear conscience.. what ever you choose seemed to be wrong.. i choose the first path.. and somehow, i really regret it now.. but if i don't.. another family uproar.. sometimes.. you just don't noe wat's rigt and wrong :::smothered:::

just recieved a postcard fr my pri sch teacher.. haha.. to tink tt she still remembers me.. hah.. can't really remember much abt her and my pri 3 life.. but watever it is.. still damn touch... ha.. life is all about appreciating others and the things they do... iamhappy... coz it rained.. :::smothered:::

irony.. sometimes you'll appreciate life so much tt you feel so lucky to be living.. sometimes you'll hate life so much tt you ask yourself why you're living.. sometimes you'll be so amazed at how things work.. sometimes you'll just feel like stopping and shutting off.. sometimes you'll be on the top of the world smiling like nobody's bussiness.. sometimes you'll feel so depressed that even crying and cutting won't solve the problem.. sometimes.. you'll just sit down and start wondering about life.. that how amazing yet.... irritating it can be... tt's life... ironic.. :::smothered :::

src="http://images.quizilla.com/M/Macky-chan/1074885140_CNatyslovable.jpg" border="0" alt="You are soooo LOVABLE!">
Waaah! You're so LOVABLE! Everybody likes you,
because you're a great person to have around
and it's always happy about everything ^^.
congrats! and...can I hug you?? plz! ^///^

Yet another personality test ^-^ (nice anime pics!)
brought to you by Quizilla :::smothered:::

was looking through all my collection of b'day cards.. thank you.. and cheer up notes.. discovered tt i'm actually very lucky to have you pple thr.. just want to say thankyou.. and i appreciate you guys.. thanks... :::smothered:::

iamhappy when it rains :::smothered:::

You are one of the few out there whose wings are
truly ANGELIC. Selfless, powerful, and
divine, you are one blessed with a certain
cosmic grace. You are unequalled in
peacefulness, love, and beauty. As a Being of
Light your wings are massive and a soft white
or silver. Countless feathers grace them and
radiate the light within you for all the world
to see. You are a defender, protector, and
caretaker. Comforter of the weak and forgiver
of the wrong, chances are you are taken
advantage of once in awhile, maybe quite often.
But your innocence and wisdom sees the good in
everyone and so this mistreatment does not make
you colder. Merciful to the extreme, you will
try to help misguided souls find themselves and
peace. However not all Angelics allow
themselves to be gotten the better of - the
Seraphim for example will be driven to fighting
for the sake of Justice and protection of those
less powerful. Congratulations - and don't ever
change - the world needs more people like you.

*~*~*Claim Your Wings - Pics and Long Answers*~*~*
brought to you by Quizilla
Rain: You are the sound of rain. You have two
important sides. There is your strong, powerful
side and your calm, gentle side. Both are very
important. Rain also reflects a bit of darkness
in your personality. It isn't bad, just shows
that along with the good, you also can see bad,
which can come in handy. (please rate my quiz)

What Sound Are You?(now w/ pics)
brought to you by Quizilla :::smothered:::

it's hard not to get influence by others.. hard to stand by your rights.. when everyone is putting pressure on you.. you have just no choice but to give in.. i'm sorry i can't be perfect :::smothered:::

chinese new year... ok how should i put it.. erm.. it's ok...but screwed up.. my hair again.. why do i always have to live the life others want me to... is tis smth to do with.. "changing yourself for others" great.. the next thing you noe.. i'm be transformed into some girly freak.. my mother's dream daughter's outfit: hailin thanks har.. :::smothered:::

CNY eve.. quite alright was pissed w reb for making me wearing e sch skirt and rainbow shirt.. but ok lah. it's not so bad... din really do ne duty.. just guide e sec 3s... and it was quite alright.. i wana slap reb leh.. so can tell me the whole concert dun have spotlights... har?? so xin tong... -kidding- went town.. ate at mos.. saw my fren from chij st threse.. wif tis grp of bunk.. then tink dun noe hu said tt they're commenting on our crk shirt.. then... tt popular din open!!! so angry andpissed.. can't get my metal hairband.. argh.. ok.. it's was really pretty alright.. yep.. hope history won't repeat itself on CNY i really dun wish to cry again... :::smothered:::

ANGRY EYES

What kind of anime eyes do you have? (picture results)
brought to you by Quizilla :::smothered:::

it's so funny!!! no pun intended har.. hey.. rebecca you too cheeky har.. wee!!! ok.. be nice! i'm sorry lah.. din mean to luff really.. haha... -slap myelf- how can you feel happy at the expence of others.. darn. sorry har.. :::smothered:::

i prayed :::smothered:::

why? when you try so hard.. and tried your very best.. to organise everything.. to try to succeed.. and do just one perfect..complete job... things just don't go your way.. i planned... i did watever it is.. but still things just don't go tt way... why must thr always be a handful of people going against you.. you must they make you such a loser.. such a failure.. such an idiot.. that sucks completely.. the expression of their eyes.. i can... yes.. i can tell.. the shaking of their heads.. everything.. it's just hard to please everyone.. and it's hard to be someone nice.. in sch.. i try to be happy.. tried to accomodate... at home.. i try to act at my best.. i tried to smile.. i acted as if everything was great.. but...... do you know everytime i fake a smile.. i'llhave this guilt building up.. evreytime when i want to breakdown and cry.. i'll pretend to yawn.. to go to the toilet.. to close my eyes and rest.. that's how people react.. they want people to see their strong points.. to think that they're strong.. do you all know tt today.. i wanted to just crumple up more than five times.. do you understand how hard it is to hold your tears.. to act cheerful.. to force your tears to go back in.. and people thinks that you're having such a great life.. and ride over you.. must you always show people attitude before they start to appreciate you.. must we go to such extend... yes... it's good to smile.. it's good to look on the bright side.. but do you know... the more you bluff yourself.. the worst everything gets.. just tell me why.. why do people have to do this... can't the world just change.. and let everyone who's hidding reveal their masks... :::smothered:::

can u just shut up!!! what ever.. stop thinking that u're so great and wo u we won't survive.. fucked! wat e lor.. got told off.... like anyone is sucking up to you or nething.. and must you use e word "suck up".. just watever.. and wat games? haha...very funny hor.. like who's gona play please??? erpz.. ok jinger.. i agree w you.. we'll just shut up... RIGHT...
Dark magician. You love the dark because of it's
beauty and just the life that no-one else sees.
Mysterious, calm, quiet... But that doesn't
mean you're not friendly!

Please rate ^^

What kind of dark person are you?
brought to you by Quizilla :::smothered:::

darn!!! dun wana eleborate.. but... it's simply hard being someone nice... no matter how u try... one cant be perfect... miao read her poem.. can tell she's almost gona cry.. good job holding ur tears.. if it was me.. haha.. i dun think i can last so long..* HAVE YOU have you.. have you ever been in my shoes.. have you ever be me for just one minute.. have you ever truely know me.. have you,the right to judge me.. have you ever felt so useless, that you feel that you're not even worth a single cent.. have you ever felt so lost, that you feel that you're in the middle of a desert.. have you ever cried so hard, that no more tears can flow out anymore.. have you ever felt so stress, that you feel your dying.. have you ever want to go away, to run away, to fade away, to die away.. have you ever been forced so much, till you do not have the will to fight anymore.. have you ever been so tired, that you just gave everything up.. have you ever hate yourself so much, that you just want to destory yourself.. have you ever felt so guilty, that you feel like the worst sinner in the world.. have you every felt so much pain, that nothing matters anymore.. have you been abused, have you nearly died, have you ever been tortured, have you ever look through me, have you ever thought how much it pains, have you ever come into my world, have you ever unrevealed my life, have you ever been in my shoes, have you ever be me for a minute, have you ever wonder why you judge me.. have you? have you ever felt so depressed, that you just feel like jumping out of the window and die... adapted* :::smothered:::

best week i ever had for my whole of secondary life... i'm serious.. coz tis week pratically have no conflicts.. haha.. orantation campfire was pretty rocking.. haha..except the many mistakes in the sound system.. (but not our fault k...) met someone tt i wanted to meet.. -grins- erffa and suling asked me abt my blog url.. hur? haha.. tot of telling them "excuse me...i'm likenot very close to you" haha.. noe whr they go liao.. sigh.. wait for o's lar... Orantation CCA.. i must admit.. it was damn chaotic but FUN... haha.. AVA stall turned up to be nice.. -grins- then went around w e mic.. then parade ard the place...haha.. tt josef tan so erm... "dumb".. din noe tt e speaker was fr a mic... he tot it was recorded....haha.. erpz lor.. then made a fool of himself.. went to beg for coke from huiqin.. then tis huiqin so blur... went to promote her cca to miao.. ahah.. nearly luff to my death.. coz i told her miao's my cousin wat.. then she really believe..haha.. then got performance.. npcc still got a bit crop up.. but tis time it was ok.. bit disappointing.. coz she din come..ha.. then wj and hui tot of tis damn cute thing..haha.. got is champange thing..haha.. yep.. all the best part of the week... dun bother to include the saddening parts.. ha.. a wave is coming... i can sense it.. :::smothered:::