So everyone has been wondering about my new job. Well here's how it went down: Monday 9-12, I wake up to a voicemail from my friend Aaron. He says that a guy left his work for a different job over the weekend and they want to fill his position that day. So I call back immediately, setup an interview for 1pm, come in, and it was a pretty chill interview, and they basically said, "We love Aaron, and so if he recommended you, you must be good. When can you start?" "Now," I reply. So that was that, all of a sudden after months of looking for work I was suddenly employed. So far, I have no complaints. I love my job. The company is called Collins Avenue, which is a production company that develops and produces various reality television shows. It's right across the street from where I went to school, so I ride my longboard to and from work everyday in 5 minutes or so. Im in the corner of the room, if I look out the window to my right I can see downtown LA, if I look out the window in front of me, I can see the Hollywood sign, that never gets old.
My job title is Development Producer/Editor. Development is the department that deals with developing ideas for projects and pitching them. Basically the development managers come to me and my coworkers with an idea for a show. Then we take the idea and over Skype (or if possible in person) interview possible people to be the cast for the show. We then decide whether or not they would fit for what we want in the show. In this sense we cover a lot of the casting at our company as well. Then what we do is take footage of these people in action (or pull footage of similar action), edit in the video footage of the interviews, create titles and graphics and compile all of this into a 3-4 minute promotional video which is basically like a movie trailer for the show. It shows the characters, explains the premise and story of the show. Then the two or three in charge of the company take these videos with a presentation and pitch it to the major networks and if they like it they will buy a season of the show which our company will then write and film.
It's been really great, even though I'm far from being a huge reality TV guy, it's a really good step in the door. All of the jobs I had been applying for were mostly production and office assistant jobs because I thought that would be all I would get - answering phones, filing papers, delivering packages, and here I am with a pretty decent job out of college. And a job where I can be creative and use my talent writing story and editing. It's also cool getting to meet a lot of unique different people from all over the country on the Skype interviews. The people I work with are awesome and very welcoming... and let me make my occasional stupid jokes. I get to work with one of my best friends out here, Aaron Inman. And lastly, but not leastly, we have a kitchen that is constantly stocked with snack food and .... cereal :)
I really appreciate everyone who has been encouraging to me in the long months of looking for work and also those of you who have prayed for me. If you read everything I wrote above, you can see that I really don't have anything to brag about on my behalf, only on God's. I have God to thank as my provider, and Aaron of course!
Lastly I would like to leave you with an anecdote, which if you have hung around me enough, you have heard before (and will hear again). A couple years ago, I took a CLEP test to opt out of Biology at Evangel. I studied like crazy for a couple weeks and went in to take the test. Of course I begged God to help me pass before I took the test. When I completed the test I had no idea whether or not I would pass, it was pretty tough. As always, the computer scored it for me immediately and told me that I had passed. I literally jumped out of my chair and said "YES! Thank you Jesus!" God spoke to me right away and said, "If you hadn't passed, would you still praise me?" BAM! We all know the answer is "no". Who thinks of praising God in the midst of failure, pain, undesirable circumstances? But yet that is what the New Testament continually pushes us towards. I'm not saying we should praise God for what he hasn't done or for the bad things that have happened to us... but let's praise him for the good he has given us. And more than that, let's praise him for just being who he is. I had a great professor in college, Randy Quackenbush, who once said in a class, "If God just created us and put us on earth and never had anything to do with us, he would be worthy of our whole life in praise to him." And look how unimaginably much he has done for us beyond that. In the months before I got this job, I struggled through these thoughts again, and once again had to come to a place of praising God where I was - poor, unemployed, discouraged. Yet I looked at what I had - I was in LA pursuing my dream, God provided me with a new car, an apartment, friends, an incredible church, a network of constantly encouraging family and friends, he provided me with food daily, and at least I got to work on a ton of TV shows as an extra. That's not so bad. But it's easy to let unemployment make us feel like less of a person because in this world, a job is what defines you. And to insert my recent quotable quote, "I want to be defined by my creator, not by my career." I knew that God wanted me to learn to be content with what he provides me (not give up on where I'm headed) but be thankful and focus on what I have rather than what I lack. And in the end of things - all this stuff is just stuff, and if our goals and dreams are just about us... in the end it will be for nothing. You're not taking your cash, car, house, coveted job, diploma, or mahogany desk with you when you die. When I'm gone I want to find heaven filled with the treasure that I have invested there. I want to leave knowing that I made a positive impact on this earth for God. And I hope that I've accomplished some of that in the past 22 years.
I love you all! Thanks again for everything and reading my blogs... hopefully they encourage you. We all know I suck at calling people on the phone, but please call me anytime you need to (or Skype). I promise I'll call you back if I don't pick up right away. And just a heads up, I am actually working on another blog which will tell you more about what I have done all summer.
Saturday, September 24, 2011
Wednesday, September 21, 2011
(Another) New Chapter SUMMER 2011
Here I am back in LA. I wanted to let you all know what's going been going on with me in the past few months.
After graduation my dad and I spent like a month and a half searching craigslist daily for cars. Finally I found an awesome car for an awesome deal - 2004 VW Jetta. It's nice to get rid of the AntiChrist (my old cadillac) and get something more modern (and that works the way a car should). I absolutely love it, I can get up to 33mpg in it, only 90k on the engine, and its quick and small. It took me a while to learn to drive a stick but now I feel like that much more of a man. And if a zombie apocalypse occurs and I only have access to a manual transmission vehicle... I will survive. Also manual transmissions are way faster and really fun to drive, I don't think I will ever go back to an auto.
I moved to LA in the last week of June and moved in with two friends from last semester at LAFSC in the same apartment complex I was in before. This was helpful, because I knew the area really well, and it was great to have some good friends to live with.
I spent many weeks applying for jobs in the industry, along with contacting literally every person I know in the industry or the area. I worked a few shoots as 2nd assistant camera (2nd AC) meaning that I update and use the clapper, switch out camera lenses, and assist the camera department with any other help that they need. That was pretty enjoyable, but I couldn't find any continuous paying jobs for it.
End of July I got to go with my roommate to the LA Coliseum to see Muse and Rage Against the Machine. My sister came and visited me for a couple days and she definitely kept me busy showing her around the town. The week after that my parents came to visit. It was really nice getting too spend some good quality time with family.
Following that, I began my acting career doing some background acting. The downsides are that it pays very little, work is sporadic, and it is literally the lowest job in the social hierarchy of jobs on a film set. Like even PA's avoid and don't talk to background actors. It's kind of hilarious. The great thing about getting to do that was getting to meet a lot of cool people, I got to spend adequate time on most of the major studio lots- Sony, Paramount, Universal, WB. I was on a couple no-name shows, some indie films, but I also got to be on shows like CSI, New Girl, Two Broke Girls, The Sing-Off, and Glee. Another benefit is that you get plenty of time to sit around which is good for reading books or writing scripts. It was great for the two months I did it, but I was definitely ready for a real job (and a resume-worthy job) at the end of the summer. And as my previous blog discusses, I did indeed find a great job.
I made the most of unemployment doing plenty of recreational activities. I have done a ton of hiking (which is a great way to see the beauty of California, and get away from hordes of people for a while). I have made it my goal to visit the beach every two weeks, and can honestly say that I have succeeded in doing this. I therefore have at this point, visited every beach from Zuma in Malibu down to Laguna (Zuma and Huntington are my personal favs). One favorite hobby of mine is longboarding (skateboard) along the beach because there is a 20 mile bike path along the coast. My roommates and I also got boogie boards. But just know that the ocean here is never warm, it may look nice and warm, but don't let it fool you, cause it's not!
To top off my summer with awesomeness, I got to drive down to San Diego to hang out with Kyle Van Kirk and his family for a few days. They were taking Callie to Cali and decided to let me join their family reunion for a few days. It was a great mini trip.
Welp, thats summer, and it certainly wasn't a bad one.
I moved to LA in the last week of June and moved in with two friends from last semester at LAFSC in the same apartment complex I was in before. This was helpful, because I knew the area really well, and it was great to have some good friends to live with.
I spent many weeks applying for jobs in the industry, along with contacting literally every person I know in the industry or the area. I worked a few shoots as 2nd assistant camera (2nd AC) meaning that I update and use the clapper, switch out camera lenses, and assist the camera department with any other help that they need. That was pretty enjoyable, but I couldn't find any continuous paying jobs for it.
End of July I got to go with my roommate to the LA Coliseum to see Muse and Rage Against the Machine. My sister came and visited me for a couple days and she definitely kept me busy showing her around the town. The week after that my parents came to visit. It was really nice getting too spend some good quality time with family.
Following that, I began my acting career doing some background acting. The downsides are that it pays very little, work is sporadic, and it is literally the lowest job in the social hierarchy of jobs on a film set. Like even PA's avoid and don't talk to background actors. It's kind of hilarious. The great thing about getting to do that was getting to meet a lot of cool people, I got to spend adequate time on most of the major studio lots- Sony, Paramount, Universal, WB. I was on a couple no-name shows, some indie films, but I also got to be on shows like CSI, New Girl, Two Broke Girls, The Sing-Off, and Glee. Another benefit is that you get plenty of time to sit around which is good for reading books or writing scripts. It was great for the two months I did it, but I was definitely ready for a real job (and a resume-worthy job) at the end of the summer. And as my previous blog discusses, I did indeed find a great job.
To top off my summer with awesomeness, I got to drive down to San Diego to hang out with Kyle Van Kirk and his family for a few days. They were taking Callie to Cali and decided to let me join their family reunion for a few days. It was a great mini trip.
Welp, thats summer, and it certainly wasn't a bad one.
Thursday, July 7, 2011
Saturday, May 21, 2011
May 21, 2011 Could be the End! (And so could tomorrow!)
A word to the mockers (which includes myself): Yes, I love the rapture jokes, (my favorite is After the Rapture Petcare - which I think may be a legit organization!) but lets take a moment to really think about it. The likelihood of the rapture/or the beginning of the end/the second coming/whatever your interpretation may be, could happen literally at any moment. Yes, even May 21, 2011. Do I think Mr. Camping is theologically inaccurate? Absolutely! Do I disagree with numerology-based prophecies and all that Bible-code stuff? Absolutely! However, I would like to remind us that whatever is going to happen could happen at any moment. It COULD happen today, it COULD happen tomorrow, it COULD happen in a thousand years. None of us know (including Camping even though he thinks he does).
I have yet to meet anyone that believes that May 21, is the end. All the Christians I know think that's totally stupid, but Matthew 24:44 says "So you also must be ready, because the Son of Man will come at an hour when you do not expect him." So for me, and every other Christian I know, today is a completely unexpected day for the return of Christ because none of us expect it at all, because we think this guy is an idiot. I'm not standing up for this guy at all, but seriously, there's a whole book about the importance of being prepared for whatever may come at any time (Revelation). I know now us college-aged Christian cynics, think the end of the world is some dumb thing that our parents and sunday school teachers always ramble about, but I think God wants us to take it seriously. (Sure I think he loves some of our rapture jokes, but lets not be ignorant). He probably doesnt expect us to try to figure out every little detail and exactly how and when its going to happen, but God is very serious about the fact that we MUST be ready.
So the question for Christians to HONESTLY ask themselves is: Are you prepared? Because if we are not prepared, it will be too late once it happens. (Matthew 24-25)
And the second question is: Are you straightening your life out just because you are scared of the end and want to save your skin, or do you honestly want to know your Creator and serve Him?
Okay, theres my theological input for the day!
I have yet to meet anyone that believes that May 21, is the end. All the Christians I know think that's totally stupid, but Matthew 24:44 says "So you also must be ready, because the Son of Man will come at an hour when you do not expect him." So for me, and every other Christian I know, today is a completely unexpected day for the return of Christ because none of us expect it at all, because we think this guy is an idiot. I'm not standing up for this guy at all, but seriously, there's a whole book about the importance of being prepared for whatever may come at any time (Revelation). I know now us college-aged Christian cynics, think the end of the world is some dumb thing that our parents and sunday school teachers always ramble about, but I think God wants us to take it seriously. (Sure I think he loves some of our rapture jokes, but lets not be ignorant). He probably doesnt expect us to try to figure out every little detail and exactly how and when its going to happen, but God is very serious about the fact that we MUST be ready.
So the question for Christians to HONESTLY ask themselves is: Are you prepared? Because if we are not prepared, it will be too late once it happens. (Matthew 24-25)
And the second question is: Are you straightening your life out just because you are scared of the end and want to save your skin, or do you honestly want to know your Creator and serve Him?
Okay, theres my theological input for the day!
Saturday, April 9, 2011
LA Update: Week 8-9
After being off of Facebook for a couple weeks, I got back on and saw that like a bazillion people had made their profile pictures of me and them. I can't tell you how blessed I was to see that. Whoever decided to get everyone together to do this - thank you. You have no idea how timely this was. In the darkest moment of my life I was reminded that I am not forgotten and abandoned. I love you all and thank you for your support and love towards me.
Tuesday, March 8
One of the film groups that I am held a casting session today, in the meantime I have been sound editing for a project which you will see in a little bit on this blog.
Wednesday, March 9
This evening all the sound designers got together so we could watch our sound projects. The assignment was that we were each given a specific clip of an action scene without any sound at all. Without watching the original scene, we had to dissect which sounds we would need and add those in. So every sound that you hear is something that I added in. This is my scene from The Incredibles (I recommend listening to it with good speakers or headphones):
Thursday, March 10
Today in class we got to watch the film that I had acted in over the weekend (last blog)... oh man. :/
(the pic is of me doing some ADR for the film)
My acting was pretty horrendous, but hey, I'm glad I gave it a shot, and maybe someday I'll get to act the part of something I would really love - an awkward character like Michael Scott, or someone in a Jared Hess film.
Friday, March 11
Good news from the skies! Holly is in town! I picked her up at the airport and as tradition goes for visitors, I immediately took her to the holy grail of fast food - In-N-Out. When we got back to the apartment, Jake and I stayed up really late finishing our script, storyboards, and other miscellaneous pre production work for our shoot the next day (not a good idea - get it done ahead of time!)
Saturday, March 12
Spent alllllll day shooting our film. Quite extensive - I think we were working on set for around 15 hours (thankfully that's not exactly legal or necessary with a crew and budget). I got rather upset... elements of my old self trying to rise up. Another late night storyboarding... I feel really bad not being able to hang out with Holly much this weekend, but thankfully she's been having a good time meeting up with friends.
Sunday, March 13
We shot for our film all day again today. My old self started to resurface, getting frustrated with people and decisions, thinking highly of myself, and not focusing on God or others at all. Aaron really put me in check. He asked me if I had been reading the Word, to which I replied "No." "I can tell," he said. BAM - conviction. I realized I was being a total idiot, letting my busyness become an excuse to not spend time with God in the past few days, and it certainly showed. Thankfully God straightened me out.
Thursday, March 17
I drove to Newport to pick up Holly tonight, she's done with her conference and gets to hang out with me for another weekend. (Or at least part of it, unfortunately she came the two weekends in a row when I am shooting for our different films). Here is one of the videos that I have been working on at my internship for a client. I redesigned the logo, modeled it in C4D, created all of the sky elements - clouds, lightning, etc, and animated them. It was awesome to be given the opportunity to have such a big part of a project.
Also, we just put up our brand new website for Psychic Bunny (my internship)
Friday, March 18
I went to work early today so that I could get out early.
Holly went with me so she could see my work, and meet some of my coworkers and then she got to hang out at Ikea while I was at work. I got done really early in the afternoon and so Holly and I went shopping. I have two "Believe it or Don't!" moments of the day. First - I actually bought an article of clothing - I got this yellow V-neck for $6! Second - the men's section at the H&M that I went to actually looked like the clothing was for men! Anyways, Holly and I had a great time shopping on Sunset Blvd and then I took her to the tourist area - the infamous Hollywood and Highland, so that she could see the stars, Kodak theater, handprints, Chinese theater, etc.
That night she and I drove to Laguna Beach and had a great dinner there with our wonderful friend Michael and his girlfriend Jess. After dinner we got to walk around on the beach and have a great talk about how if the nuclear reactors in Japan blow up, everyone west of Utah will die in three months. It was nice hanging out with them, espesh since I haven't seen Michael since like the second week I was at school.
Saturday, March 19
We shot most of the day today for our big short film (the one that we spend all semester on and have a whole budget and crew for). When I got done, Holly, Anson and I, went to the store to get some groceries to make dinner with and then we made an amazing manicotti. Then we watched a sweet ski movie that Holly brought. I MISS THE SNOW!!!! Someday I will live by a ski resort again and I will snowboard every weekend! ....well hopefully. Speaking of snow. There is this new band I found thanks to Pandora, and they are freaking awesome - Miike Snow. (Some of their songs don't have very wholesome lyrics so skip those, but this song here is sweet).
We then went to Yogurtland and then walked around the museums.
Sunday, March 20
Because of this giant marathon thing in Hollywood, church was cancelled today, so I finally got a morning to sleep in. I took holly to airport and then returned for my last day of filming. We got done around 11, and then I took some much needed time to worship and blog. It was sad to see Holly go, but I was so blessed to have her come visit. She really is the best sister ever (she even cleaned up our kitchen!) It's also just nice to have the company of family when you're having a tough time.
Well life has been quite the trip. I am walking through the valley of the shadow of death in my life, but God has been my shepherd, leading me through it. As much as I loved my past four years at Evangel, it is nearly impossible to recall my memory of it without pain. It is now interwoven with so much hurt. I don't know how I'll ever be able to look back on it the same. But I praise God for the work he is doing through this time. I am learning so much, I am knowing Him so much more, I am surrendering all to Him, and I am dependent on him.
For the first time in my life, I am really beginning to understand joy. What is joy? It supersedes all that we know as happiness. Happiness is shallow, happiness is temporary, happiness is fleeting, happiness is an emotion, here for a moment and gone the next. But joy lives on. I have found joy in Christ. It's an interesting concept, so opposite of what our humanity teaches us. People ask me how I'm doing and it's hard to know what to say. Obviously life really sucks and I'm full of pain but I'm good, because my hope is in Christ, because he is my strength and I find joy and hope in knowing him and knowing that he is always with me. Happiness cannot survive through trial and suffering, but joy lives on through everything. It's awesome to finally be able to grasp a piece of that.
Tuesday, March 8
One of the film groups that I am held a casting session today, in the meantime I have been sound editing for a project which you will see in a little bit on this blog.
Wednesday, March 9
This evening all the sound designers got together so we could watch our sound projects. The assignment was that we were each given a specific clip of an action scene without any sound at all. Without watching the original scene, we had to dissect which sounds we would need and add those in. So every sound that you hear is something that I added in. This is my scene from The Incredibles (I recommend listening to it with good speakers or headphones):
Thursday, March 10
Today in class we got to watch the film that I had acted in over the weekend (last blog)... oh man. :/
(the pic is of me doing some ADR for the film)My acting was pretty horrendous, but hey, I'm glad I gave it a shot, and maybe someday I'll get to act the part of something I would really love - an awkward character like Michael Scott, or someone in a Jared Hess film.
Friday, March 11
Good news from the skies! Holly is in town! I picked her up at the airport and as tradition goes for visitors, I immediately took her to the holy grail of fast food - In-N-Out. When we got back to the apartment, Jake and I stayed up really late finishing our script, storyboards, and other miscellaneous pre production work for our shoot the next day (not a good idea - get it done ahead of time!)
Saturday, March 12
Spent alllllll day shooting our film. Quite extensive - I think we were working on set for around 15 hours (thankfully that's not exactly legal or necessary with a crew and budget). I got rather upset... elements of my old self trying to rise up. Another late night storyboarding... I feel really bad not being able to hang out with Holly much this weekend, but thankfully she's been having a good time meeting up with friends.
Sunday, March 13
We shot for our film all day again today. My old self started to resurface, getting frustrated with people and decisions, thinking highly of myself, and not focusing on God or others at all. Aaron really put me in check. He asked me if I had been reading the Word, to which I replied "No." "I can tell," he said. BAM - conviction. I realized I was being a total idiot, letting my busyness become an excuse to not spend time with God in the past few days, and it certainly showed. Thankfully God straightened me out.Thursday, March 17
I drove to Newport to pick up Holly tonight, she's done with her conference and gets to hang out with me for another weekend. (Or at least part of it, unfortunately she came the two weekends in a row when I am shooting for our different films). Here is one of the videos that I have been working on at my internship for a client. I redesigned the logo, modeled it in C4D, created all of the sky elements - clouds, lightning, etc, and animated them. It was awesome to be given the opportunity to have such a big part of a project.
Brain Hero from Center on the Developing Child on Vimeo.
Also, we just put up our brand new website for Psychic Bunny (my internship)
Friday, March 18
I went to work early today so that I could get out early.
Holly went with me so she could see my work, and meet some of my coworkers and then she got to hang out at Ikea while I was at work. I got done really early in the afternoon and so Holly and I went shopping. I have two "Believe it or Don't!" moments of the day. First - I actually bought an article of clothing - I got this yellow V-neck for $6! Second - the men's section at the H&M that I went to actually looked like the clothing was for men! Anyways, Holly and I had a great time shopping on Sunset Blvd and then I took her to the tourist area - the infamous Hollywood and Highland, so that she could see the stars, Kodak theater, handprints, Chinese theater, etc.
That night she and I drove to Laguna Beach and had a great dinner there with our wonderful friend Michael and his girlfriend Jess. After dinner we got to walk around on the beach and have a great talk about how if the nuclear reactors in Japan blow up, everyone west of Utah will die in three months. It was nice hanging out with them, espesh since I haven't seen Michael since like the second week I was at school.Saturday, March 19
We shot most of the day today for our big short film (the one that we spend all semester on and have a whole budget and crew for). When I got done, Holly, Anson and I, went to the store to get some groceries to make dinner with and then we made an amazing manicotti. Then we watched a sweet ski movie that Holly brought. I MISS THE SNOW!!!! Someday I will live by a ski resort again and I will snowboard every weekend! ....well hopefully. Speaking of snow. There is this new band I found thanks to Pandora, and they are freaking awesome - Miike Snow. (Some of their songs don't have very wholesome lyrics so skip those, but this song here is sweet). We then went to Yogurtland and then walked around the museums.
Sunday, March 20
Because of this giant marathon thing in Hollywood, church was cancelled today, so I finally got a morning to sleep in. I took holly to airport and then returned for my last day of filming. We got done around 11, and then I took some much needed time to worship and blog. It was sad to see Holly go, but I was so blessed to have her come visit. She really is the best sister ever (she even cleaned up our kitchen!) It's also just nice to have the company of family when you're having a tough time.
Well life has been quite the trip. I am walking through the valley of the shadow of death in my life, but God has been my shepherd, leading me through it. As much as I loved my past four years at Evangel, it is nearly impossible to recall my memory of it without pain. It is now interwoven with so much hurt. I don't know how I'll ever be able to look back on it the same. But I praise God for the work he is doing through this time. I am learning so much, I am knowing Him so much more, I am surrendering all to Him, and I am dependent on him.
For the first time in my life, I am really beginning to understand joy. What is joy? It supersedes all that we know as happiness. Happiness is shallow, happiness is temporary, happiness is fleeting, happiness is an emotion, here for a moment and gone the next. But joy lives on. I have found joy in Christ. It's an interesting concept, so opposite of what our humanity teaches us. People ask me how I'm doing and it's hard to know what to say. Obviously life really sucks and I'm full of pain but I'm good, because my hope is in Christ, because he is my strength and I find joy and hope in knowing him and knowing that he is always with me. Happiness cannot survive through trial and suffering, but joy lives on through everything. It's awesome to finally be able to grasp a piece of that.
Saturday, April 2, 2011
LA Update: Week 11-12
So my sister tells me my blogs are depressing... Funny, because I thought they were incredibly hopeful given my circumstances. I may be sad, but certainly not depressed, as I mentioned in my last blog, I have found joy in Christ, joy which gives me comfort through tears and sorrow. Now that that's cleared up, here is another blog!
Monday, March 21
So today at my internship... quite interesting. One of my bosses had this old water cooler that looked like it was from the 70's (I think because it actually was from the 70's), he asked me to get some spray paint and paint it white. So I walk around downtown and went to this art shop and the only spray they had was the legit like tagging spray paint. So I take this cooler and paint it and wow- that was the freaking most powerful paint I have ever smelled. No wonder people wear gas masks when they tag. I would literally have to take a huge breath, spray as much as I could and run about 40 feet away to breathe again. And I think I still got high... okay well not really, but holy crap that stuff freaking killed some brain cells. Since church was canceled the day before because of that marathon, we had church tonight, so I went straight there from work. It was a really informative sermon on women in the church. Chordle has had one of his friends (also named Luke) visiting this week, so when we got back that night we went to this really cool local burger place and hung out there for a while.
Tuesday, March 22
I'm not sure if I have mentioned it yet, but I have been working on this title sequence for our short film. It has seriously been one of the most fun projects I have ever worked on. I'm pulling my inspiration for it from three different title sequences - Catch Me If You Can, Kung Fu Panda, and a third one that I can't think of right now. Anyways, I'm sure I'll put it up online when it's done. After dinner and a good dose of free samples from Yogurtland, we had our bible study and then I had some good blogging time.
Friday, March 25
We filmed for our short film today (The Adventures of Andy Wilston). We filmed at this really awesome park which overlooks LA. It was a really cool location and we hired these stunt guys to be pirates and ninjas in our movie and they were super legit, it was pretty awesome. At the end of the day, I realized that I had gotten a nasty sunburn though. Which taught me a lesson that I've learned many times before and still haven't grasped - even though it's overcast, you can STILL GET SUNBURNT. Anyways, I went to the hot tub with some friends when I got back. That was just what I needed!
Saturday, March 26
We had to get up real early and filmed all morning and afternoon, but we got done at like 3:30, so that was pretty cool having the rest of the day open. I took a short nap, which of course turned into a much needed 3.5 hour nap. After that I had a really good talk with the parents and then went over to the school to work on stuff. Some friends had just started watching Jaws, so I gave myself an excuse for a distraction and joined them in watching the movie. Afterwards I didn't really feel like working on homework so I just blogged for a while, that was good. I think blogging is good for me, it's kind of comforting to be able to list off my thoughts and feelings and listen to music. It's kind of an escape from the constant busyness and noisiness of LA.
Tuesday, March 29
Normally I don't go into my internship on Tuesdays, but today they were doing a shoot for a promotional webisode we are shooting for a website, (I sure hope my work doesn't sue me for uploading this picture of me slating the video and wearing their T-Shirt!)
Wednesday, March 30
After my internship I stayed up all night editing and color grading the final cut of a short film that our group had done a couple weeks prior. It's actually pretty cool though that this was my first all nighter since I've been here, the work load has definitely been a lot less because of being able to work on group projects.
Thursday, March 31
Quite an eventful day. Tonight we are having a huge party at my work, so they asked me to take tomorrow off and come in today to help set up. After class I went back that night for the party. I knew the party would be awesome but I wasn't personally thrilled about it. I'm not really a big fan of being in a place with a bunch of people that I don't know and I don't really want to intrude on the conversations of others. Anyways the party itself was awesome, but I kind of awkwardly shuffled around and just talked with one of my coworkers. After about 45 mins or an hour of that I met up with my good friend Caleb Pyles. I met him over at the Dream Center, which was actually my first time actually being at the Dream Center. It was really good to see him though and we walked around Echo Park (which apparently is one of the more ghetto areas of LA) and we had a really good talk catching up and everything. THEN my friend Zachary Kidder is supposed to be flying in tonight so we started driving to the airport to pick him up. Unfortunately my car has been having trouble with the rear brakes and my car just skidded forwards. It was pretty freaky so I pulled into a McDonald's parking lot. I couldn't move my car and didn't really know exactly what was wrong with it, so I had to have a tow truck called and waited till 3:30am for that to show up. So that all kind of sucked, but there's not much in my life that seems like that big of deal anymore compared to other things I've faced. I was actually really blessed how everything worked out... first of all that my car froze up literally right before I pulled onto the freeway, secondly that Caleb was with me and we were only a couple blocks from the Dream Center. He was able to walk back and borrow a friend's car to go pick up Zach at the airport and then they came and met up with me and hung out in the parking lot until the tow truck showed up. Sure, I wasn't at all thrilled about this all happening, but I don't think it could have happened with better circumstances for me, so praise God for that! Needless to say, I was exhausted by the time I got back and not excited about having to pay money to fix a car worth like $500.
Friday, April 1
Gmail Motion looks soooo cool!
April Fools! I seriously just looovvve Google's annual April Fool's day jokes. Incredible! Today I gave Zach a tour of my school and then he and I worked on some homework for a while. Then we drove to Huntington Beach to meet up with my roommate Jake who had been staying with his family at this fancy beach resort. It was such a great night. Zach and I got bodyboards from the hotel and got to use them in the ocean. It was so fun. But I was pretty exhausted after that. After we dried off and got cleaned up, Jake's parents took us out for a great BBQ dinner and ice cream.
Saturday, April 2
Gotta love waking up at 7:00 AM on Saturday, huh?! This morning Zach and I got up and went with some of my classmates to Fuller Theological Seminary in Pasadena for the Reel Spirituality Conference: The Death of the Critic.
It was really awesome getting to hear some film critics and filmmakers speak about the role of a critic and they're importance. We also got to view the Academy Award winning short film "God of Love"
Monday, March 21
So today at my internship... quite interesting. One of my bosses had this old water cooler that looked like it was from the 70's (I think because it actually was from the 70's), he asked me to get some spray paint and paint it white. So I walk around downtown and went to this art shop and the only spray they had was the legit like tagging spray paint. So I take this cooler and paint it and wow- that was the freaking most powerful paint I have ever smelled. No wonder people wear gas masks when they tag. I would literally have to take a huge breath, spray as much as I could and run about 40 feet away to breathe again. And I think I still got high... okay well not really, but holy crap that stuff freaking killed some brain cells. Since church was canceled the day before because of that marathon, we had church tonight, so I went straight there from work. It was a really informative sermon on women in the church. Chordle has had one of his friends (also named Luke) visiting this week, so when we got back that night we went to this really cool local burger place and hung out there for a while.
Tuesday, March 22
I'm not sure if I have mentioned it yet, but I have been working on this title sequence for our short film. It has seriously been one of the most fun projects I have ever worked on. I'm pulling my inspiration for it from three different title sequences - Catch Me If You Can, Kung Fu Panda, and a third one that I can't think of right now. Anyways, I'm sure I'll put it up online when it's done. After dinner and a good dose of free samples from Yogurtland, we had our bible study and then I had some good blogging time.
Friday, March 25
We filmed for our short film today (The Adventures of Andy Wilston). We filmed at this really awesome park which overlooks LA. It was a really cool location and we hired these stunt guys to be pirates and ninjas in our movie and they were super legit, it was pretty awesome. At the end of the day, I realized that I had gotten a nasty sunburn though. Which taught me a lesson that I've learned many times before and still haven't grasped - even though it's overcast, you can STILL GET SUNBURNT. Anyways, I went to the hot tub with some friends when I got back. That was just what I needed!
Saturday, March 26
We had to get up real early and filmed all morning and afternoon, but we got done at like 3:30, so that was pretty cool having the rest of the day open. I took a short nap, which of course turned into a much needed 3.5 hour nap. After that I had a really good talk with the parents and then went over to the school to work on stuff. Some friends had just started watching Jaws, so I gave myself an excuse for a distraction and joined them in watching the movie. Afterwards I didn't really feel like working on homework so I just blogged for a while, that was good. I think blogging is good for me, it's kind of comforting to be able to list off my thoughts and feelings and listen to music. It's kind of an escape from the constant busyness and noisiness of LA.
Tuesday, March 29
Normally I don't go into my internship on Tuesdays, but today they were doing a shoot for a promotional webisode we are shooting for a website, (I sure hope my work doesn't sue me for uploading this picture of me slating the video and wearing their T-Shirt!)
Wednesday, March 30
After my internship I stayed up all night editing and color grading the final cut of a short film that our group had done a couple weeks prior. It's actually pretty cool though that this was my first all nighter since I've been here, the work load has definitely been a lot less because of being able to work on group projects.
Thursday, March 31
Quite an eventful day. Tonight we are having a huge party at my work, so they asked me to take tomorrow off and come in today to help set up. After class I went back that night for the party. I knew the party would be awesome but I wasn't personally thrilled about it. I'm not really a big fan of being in a place with a bunch of people that I don't know and I don't really want to intrude on the conversations of others. Anyways the party itself was awesome, but I kind of awkwardly shuffled around and just talked with one of my coworkers. After about 45 mins or an hour of that I met up with my good friend Caleb Pyles. I met him over at the Dream Center, which was actually my first time actually being at the Dream Center. It was really good to see him though and we walked around Echo Park (which apparently is one of the more ghetto areas of LA) and we had a really good talk catching up and everything. THEN my friend Zachary Kidder is supposed to be flying in tonight so we started driving to the airport to pick him up. Unfortunately my car has been having trouble with the rear brakes and my car just skidded forwards. It was pretty freaky so I pulled into a McDonald's parking lot. I couldn't move my car and didn't really know exactly what was wrong with it, so I had to have a tow truck called and waited till 3:30am for that to show up. So that all kind of sucked, but there's not much in my life that seems like that big of deal anymore compared to other things I've faced. I was actually really blessed how everything worked out... first of all that my car froze up literally right before I pulled onto the freeway, secondly that Caleb was with me and we were only a couple blocks from the Dream Center. He was able to walk back and borrow a friend's car to go pick up Zach at the airport and then they came and met up with me and hung out in the parking lot until the tow truck showed up. Sure, I wasn't at all thrilled about this all happening, but I don't think it could have happened with better circumstances for me, so praise God for that! Needless to say, I was exhausted by the time I got back and not excited about having to pay money to fix a car worth like $500.
Friday, April 1
Gmail Motion looks soooo cool!
April Fools! I seriously just looovvve Google's annual April Fool's day jokes. Incredible! Today I gave Zach a tour of my school and then he and I worked on some homework for a while. Then we drove to Huntington Beach to meet up with my roommate Jake who had been staying with his family at this fancy beach resort. It was such a great night. Zach and I got bodyboards from the hotel and got to use them in the ocean. It was so fun. But I was pretty exhausted after that. After we dried off and got cleaned up, Jake's parents took us out for a great BBQ dinner and ice cream.
Saturday, April 2
Gotta love waking up at 7:00 AM on Saturday, huh?! This morning Zach and I got up and went with some of my classmates to Fuller Theological Seminary in Pasadena for the Reel Spirituality Conference: The Death of the Critic.
It was really awesome getting to hear some film critics and filmmakers speak about the role of a critic and they're importance. We also got to view the Academy Award winning short film "God of Love"
Sunday, March 27, 2011
LA Update: Week 6-7
I ended the last blog post with high spirits and strong hopes, I never could have imagined that I would be writing this next blog with such different circumstances. I have met the lowest point of my life thus far.
Monday, February 14
Happy Valentines day! Sadly enough mine wasn't too special, but I'm sure someone somewhere had a spectacular day, and that's good to know! I pretty much just went to my internship and took it easy. I definitely had some attacks from Satan today, and it was incredible because my roommates prayed with me and things just completely changed. It was pretty unbelievably awesome. It reminded me of the hymn "What a Friend We Have in Jesus." When we started praying I felt like crap, but by the end of it, after carrying my burdens to God, I felt the weight lifted off of me, and I was consumed with God's spirit. Anyways, I thought about posting the lyrics from the song that are specifically related, but I think I'll post the whole thing cause its all really awesome:
What a Friend we have in Jesus, all our sins and griefs to bear!
What a privilege to carry everything to God in prayer!
O what peace we often forfeit, O what needless pain we bear,
All because we do not carry everything to God in prayer.
Have we trials and temptations? Is there trouble anywhere?
We should never be discouraged; take it to the Lord in prayer.
Can we find a friend so faithful who will all our sorrows share?
Jesus knows our every weakness; take it to the Lord in prayer.
Are we weak and heavy laden, cumbered with a load of care?
Precious Savior, still our refuge, take it to the Lord in prayer.
Do your friends despise, forsake you? Take it to the Lord in prayer!
In His arms He’ll take and shield you; you will find a solace there.
Blessed Savior, Thou hast promised Thou wilt all our burdens bear
May we ever, Lord, be bringing all to Thee in earnest prayer.
Soon in glory bright unclouded there will be no need for prayer
Rapture, praise and endless worship will be our sweet portion there.
Wednesday, February 16
So my internship has been pretty cool. Sure driving downtown is kind of a hassle and its a pretty ghetto place, but all the people I work with have been totally awesome. They are all really cool and chill and have been very welcoming to me. When I'm not doing intern duties or helping out people on projects, I do tutorials to help me learn and advance my skills with software. Lately I've been doing a lot of tutorials with Adobe Illustrator to help me learn that. Here are a couple vector images that I made from scratch in Illustrator (of course with the guidance of tutorials).
After I got back from my internship I worked out with Jake and Chordle. I'm sure if I mentioned yet that I've started working out again, but it's really been awesome, and I think I'm getting stronger than I did when I was on P90X even. I guess I have Jake to thank for that, he kind of created this workout plan. Anyways, it's been really awesome, and I'm excited to see how I improve over the semester.
Thursday, February 17
Tonight we had a spectacular group dinner! Jake, Michelle and I wandered around Ralph's trying to decide what we could make a large quantity of for dinner. After a couple debates with Jake about certain foods having too much trans fat and being unhealthy, we decided on taco salad. I must say, it was quite the delish, and it made quite the dish! During our meal we
watched The King's Speech [*warning SPOILERS*]. I really enjoyed it a lot. It was a quality film with a great message. From an aesthetic viewpoint, I certainly did not enjoy their intentional desire to break the "rules" of cinematography. Sure it was artsy, sometimes it was beautiful, but a lot of times it was really distracting and not contributing to the story. But those are really my only complaints about it. The set design, acting, costumes, and writing were incredible. Honestly I have no idea how they made the film for $12mil. The message of the story speaks about many things: rising to the occasion, embracing humility, overcoming fears/obstacles, and maybe most of all the power of speech. What an incredible gift that God gave us the ability to speak. With our mouths we can speak life or death, we can encourage and we can uplift or we can destroy and tear down. Colin Firth's character is not at all thrilled about being King, nor is he thrilled about humbling himself and admitting his errors before Geoffery Rush, but as he sees his world darken on the verge of war, he sees the necessity of him to let go of himself and stand to be the leader that his country needs him to be.
Friday, February 18
My internship was pretty awesome today, I got to meet the sound designer and he basically gave the other intern and I like a two hour lesson on sound design. Being the current sound designer for one of our short films, it was way cool getting to see a professional work and get some good practical advice from him on mixing and editing. After the internship I worked out and then we had some friends come over. I was pretty tired though and didn't really feel like hanging out so I just went to bed. Isn't that weird?
Monday, February 21
Yay for President's Day! I got work off! I think that's the first time that I have ever heard of anyone celebrating and getting work off for President's day, but hey, I'm not complaining! Plus Washington was a totally legit prez, and its his bday. Anyways, I kind of just spent the day doing homework anyway.
Here's a special effects test shot that I made to see if I can do this effect in film we may shoot:
If the video above doesn't play, click the link below:
http://www.blogger.com/video-play.mp4?contentId=c148513d816d6320&type=video%2Fmp4
Wednesday, February 23
I was under the assumption that things were improving in life, but I read something online this morning that threw me for a loop. Foreshadowed by my discussion about "The King's Speech" I would like to revisit the comments about the power of words. It's so unbelievable how powerful our words are. And just to think that the moment we say them, or the moment that we type them and press "Send" those words will never ever be taken back. They are burned into history forever. That's why it is so important that we are cautious about the things that we say, and the way that we say them can affect the people that hear them. The bible is so clear on the importance of thinking before you speak and not speaking out of emotion. On the flipside, it is so important that we understand situations and circumstances, before assuming the meaning of something. Satan can easily twist words in our minds to mean something that they never were meant to mean. Speak with wisdom and listen with discernment.
Well whatever worries I had were instantly diminished and put on hold. All of the students were emailed to come into school this evening. None of us knew what it was about. When I got into the classroom I saw all the teachers were there. All of them... something was clearly wrong. Our school director spoke to us and told us that one of our classmates, Joshua Malenke had gotten in an accident that morning and died on impact. I was completely shocked. It was different from any experience with death I've ever had. First of all he was my age, he had a loving girlfriend and family and friends. He had dreams and goals just like me and now he was gone. Secondly, he was unexpectedly gone in a moment. He wasn't recovering in the hospital.
I couldn't go to the hospital and visit him and pray for him. He was just gone. It was a hard thing to accept. We got into small groups and talked about Josh and prayed about everything. When we all separated, my roommates decided to have people come over to our apartment and pray and worship. No one understood this situation, but one thing we understood was that God was the only place we could turn. We had like 15 or 20 people come to our apartment and turned on some worship music and just prayed. (Josh is on the far right in the pic). It makes me realize how quickly life can be given and taken. Any of us could be gone in a moment, and although we should not live in fear of that, we should realize that we are simply not in control, and realize the pertinence of our relationships with people. Are we truly living our lives rightly? Do those of us that we love really know how much they mean to us? These are thoughts that were running through my mind, and I made sure to let those people that are most important in my life know how much they mean to me. I can't even fathom the pain that Josh's family and friends are going through. I don't even want to think about how my family and friends would feel if I died. Please, if you are reading this, please pray for Josh's family, his girlfriend, and everyone who's life he blessed. Pray that God will mourn with them and love them and take care of them.
Thursday, February 24
Because of everything we heard about the night before, classes were cancelled for Thursday. Some of us guys felt like it would be good for us to get together for breakfast so we went to one of the apartments and made a big breakfast together. Afterwards we went over to the school where our professors had prepared a type of memorial time for Josh. We worshiped and prayed together and shared stories about Josh. Although we were all still in a lot of shock and confusion, it was a very healing time. Life seems very relentless right now. Later that night I faced my biggest trial yet. I learned some things (unrelated to Josh's death) that have forever changed my life.
Friday, February 25
Today is Holly's 24th birthday! Hopefully her day went better than mine. I can't really determine whether today or the day before is the worst day of my life, because of the things that I had learned last night (once again this is a situation separate from Josh's death). I never imagined that I could feel a pain as terrible as what I feel now, and its probably only a small fraction of the pain that God feels right now. I stumbled through my day at my internship on the verge of tears and came to my apartment to the comfort of my closet. The comfort of the carpet that my face and tears have become so familiar of. I read through like a quarter of the Psalms today, and it brought so much pain to read. I've never related to them so much in my life. I could feel the pain in those words because I now know a piece of that pain. Today, my heart's greatest desires in this world were shattered. I have become nothing. What more does God want of me? I will give it to him, because it has no comparison to what I have lost. No comparison. In the midst of my destruction I lift my hands to worship my God, my king, my savior. I will embrace the overwhelming wall of pain as it destroys me so that I may become nothing and Christ may become everything.
Saturday, February 26
Of course, another rough day. But God is doing a tremendous work in my heart.
I went to Barnes & Noble tonight with some friends. I love Barnes & Noble! I got the book of Aesop's Fables. Although not as spiritually related, they are similar to how Jesus tells parables. I think reading them will benefit me greatly because it is an example of my goals through filmmaking - to tell a story that speaks a message of truth. Later that night we had a bunch of people come over to our apartment again to spend time in prayer and worship. As much as having Josh gone is awful, it truly is bringing many people closer to Christ.
Chordle has been through a lot of crap in his life. He gave me a book that he read in the midst of his greatest pain and trial, so I've been reading this book called Shattered Dreams by Larry Crabb. It's not an enjoyable or comforting read at all, but it speaks a harsh truth that the Bible strongly professes - that life is not about us and the things that we have a right to, it is about giving everything to God and serving him with everything.
Sunday, February 27
This is the big day - the 83rd annual Academy Awards. Well since my church is on Hollywood Blvd a couple blocks from the Kodak Theater, we decided to walk over there after church.
They had the whole street shut down and fenced off for like a straight mile. And I swear there was as many police and security there as there are for the flippin president. So we saw the red carpet and all that jazz. It's pretty cool, I enjoy the Oscars but in many ways it's sad too, because so many people here worship the god of Oscar. Not to mention celebrities. But no worries, I won't go on an anti-pop culture rant. 
There was a big Oscar party held at our school that night, tons of free food and awesomeness. We also all voted on who would win what Oscars.
Out of the 24 awards I guessed 16 correctly - not incredible, but I was second highest in our class so I got a free iTunes gift card! No complaints there! Later that night I got to hang out with a good ol' friend from Evangel - Caleb Pyles. He came over and we got to spend some good quality time talking and catching up. Hopefully we'll have some more great opportunities to hang out in the future.
Friday, March 4
Work was really awesome today. I was asked to design a logo for a project (and my recently learned Adobe Illustrator skills were put to good use!) Then after that I was asked to create and animate the logo in the Cinema 4D (a 3d modeling/animation program) so my skills taught by Chip Stanek in my 2D/3D Animation class were put to good use. And it was a lot of fun. The video hasn't been produced yet, so I probably can't post my work, but when the video is released I will make sure to put it up here.
Today was Jake's 23rd birthday so a couple friends and I took him out to dinner at this FANTABULOUS restaurant called Maggiano's. It was so awesome. We drove about 30 mins north of Burbank to go to this place and then we ordered the biggest meal ever. (You get free refills of dishes so we would get our plates refilled with food when we were done eating and doggybag it, so we literally left with as much food as we ate... and let me tell you that leftovers are a wonderful thing for a 22 year old bachelor!) It was sooo good though, this restaurant is def one of my new faves. Anyways it was so awesome. I really needed that- to just get away from everything to relax and enjoy a great dinner for 2.5 hours with some of the greatest guys I know. It was a really healing time for me. It has definitely been one of my favorite nights so far in LA.
Saturday, March 5
For a while now I have been wanting to try
my abilities in acting... not because I think I have any natural talent or even a desire to pursue it, but because I think it would be beneficial for me as a director, to better understand the mind of an actor. So anyways, I was given a good opportunity to act in some of my friends' short film. I got to play the main role and it was so much fun. We shot most of it out in the desert and it was worth it just to spend the day there. It made me feel like being back home... dry dirt and mountains. So beautiful!
Sunday, March 6
Totally random thing happened at church today: I'm walking out of the sanctuary and I see that the guy in front of me has a "Skinny Improv" messenger bag with him. "What the heck?" I thought to myself, "Are there other Skinny Improv's around? Is it a chain? I thought it was just in Springfield." So I tap him on the shoulder, "Hey are you from Springfield" "Yeah" "Oh cool, yeah I noticed you have a Skinny Improv bag, are you part of the group?" "Yeah!" So anyways, I find out that it's Jeff Houghton, the dude that like founded it, and apparently he just moved to LA. So anyways, it was one of those "small world" moments. Pretty cool!
I must admit that after the trauma I have faced, I kind of wanted to stop writing my blog (surely you can tell that my blogs have been very belated) but I guess that would be in contradiction with the name of my blog. LOL. So I decided to write it anyway, to continue sharing my journey's through life. I guess I could rename my blog to "This Blog Does Not Give Up" lol. Well aside from that dumb joke, I realize that few of my words in this blog (and in future blogs) will be happy. It is by far my darkest season, my lowest valley, and driest desert yet. But if going through this will glorify God, if it reveals his truth and life and love, if it inspires others, than it is worth it. Every morning I wake up in peaceful bliss for a split second and then within moments I relearn the truth. I relearn my position of disbelief and pain. And it really does pretty much happen every morning. I am the weakest I have ever been, yet I am the strongest I have ever been because of God. I am destroyed. I am nothing but the dust which I lay in. But I have been found in the aftermath. In the rubble, in the destruction of Luke Salewski, I have found Christ, and have begun the journey of dying to myself everyday.
A couple days before my world fell apart, the new Hillsong album "Aftermath" was released. I'm pretty sure the timing was perfect. I have been listening to it a ton. The title track "Aftermath" has become my anthem. Here is the song and the lyrics:
The skies lay low where You are
On the earth You rest Your feet
Yet the hands that cradle the stars
Are the hands that bled for me
In a moment of glorious surrender
You were broken for all the world to see
Lifted out of the ashes
I am found in the aftermath
Freedom found in Your scars
In Your grace my life redeemed
For You chose to take the sinner's crown
As You placed Your crown on me
In that moment of glorious surrender
Was the moment You broke the chains in me
Lifted out of the ashes
I am found in the aftermath
And in that moment You opened up the heavens
To the broken the beggar and the thief
Lifted out of the wreckage
I find hope in the aftermath
And I know that You're with me
Yes I know that You're with me here
And I know Your love will light the way
Now all I have I count it all as loss
But to know You and to carry the cross
Knowing I'm found
In the light of the aftermath
I'm beginning to see how life is really not about me at all, it's about God. I am here for him and not for me. If there is any good in me, if I ever say anything true or right, it is God, not me. Really the only thing that we have control over is free will. God gives us the ability to make our own choices and then he does the work. I used to think I had a right to this life to everything, but nothing belongs to us. Our bodies, our hearts, and souls, they belong to God, and we are only stewards of them.
I am emotionally sick and devastated. I don't wish this pain on anyone. And I will do whatever I can, whatever the Lord wills me to do, to prevent anyone from ever having to go through this pain or anything worse. I am filled with a new hope for heaven. Sure heaven has always sounded cool, but it's not really an anxious desire of our hearts, not until we see how dark life can be. Now I look forward to the day when I will hear the words, “Now the dwelling of God is with men, and he will live with them. They will be his people, and God himself will be with them and be their God. He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.” (Rev. 21:3-4) Another song I have held to dearly is "You Hold Me Now" by Hillsong. Sometimes I sit in my closet and play this song on my ukulele. I can hardly get through the chorus without bawling my eyes out.
On that day when I see
All that You have for me
When I see You face to face
There surrounded by Your grace
All my fears swept away
In the light of Your embrace
Where Your love is all I need
And forever I am free
Where the streets are made of gold
In Your presence healed and whole
Let the songs of heaven
Rise to You alone
No weeping no hurt or pain
No suffering You hold me now
You hold me now
No darkness no sick or lame
No hiding You hold me now
You hold me now
In this life I will stand
Through my joy and my pain
Knowing there's a greater day
There's a hope that never fails
Where Your Name is lifted high
And forever praises rise
For the glory of Your Name
I'm believing for the day
Where the wars and violence cease
All creation lives in peace
Let the songs of heaven
Rise to You alone
For eternity
All my heart will give
All the glory to Your Name
By grace, in spite of my failures, God gives me the strength to forgive and love. I'm done taking care of myself... and there's not much left to take care of, so I will devote my life to taking care of others. At the end of the day, I lift my broken arms to God and worship him. My heart has been shattered beyond my imagination but the pieces are in his hands. And through my tears and ashes, I will still proclaim that God is good, he is always good.
Monday, February 14
Happy Valentines day! Sadly enough mine wasn't too special, but I'm sure someone somewhere had a spectacular day, and that's good to know! I pretty much just went to my internship and took it easy. I definitely had some attacks from Satan today, and it was incredible because my roommates prayed with me and things just completely changed. It was pretty unbelievably awesome. It reminded me of the hymn "What a Friend We Have in Jesus." When we started praying I felt like crap, but by the end of it, after carrying my burdens to God, I felt the weight lifted off of me, and I was consumed with God's spirit. Anyways, I thought about posting the lyrics from the song that are specifically related, but I think I'll post the whole thing cause its all really awesome:
What a Friend we have in Jesus, all our sins and griefs to bear!
What a privilege to carry everything to God in prayer!
O what peace we often forfeit, O what needless pain we bear,
All because we do not carry everything to God in prayer.
Have we trials and temptations? Is there trouble anywhere?
We should never be discouraged; take it to the Lord in prayer.
Can we find a friend so faithful who will all our sorrows share?
Jesus knows our every weakness; take it to the Lord in prayer.
Are we weak and heavy laden, cumbered with a load of care?
Precious Savior, still our refuge, take it to the Lord in prayer.
Do your friends despise, forsake you? Take it to the Lord in prayer!
In His arms He’ll take and shield you; you will find a solace there.
Blessed Savior, Thou hast promised Thou wilt all our burdens bear
May we ever, Lord, be bringing all to Thee in earnest prayer.
Soon in glory bright unclouded there will be no need for prayer
Rapture, praise and endless worship will be our sweet portion there.
Wednesday, February 16
So my internship has been pretty cool. Sure driving downtown is kind of a hassle and its a pretty ghetto place, but all the people I work with have been totally awesome. They are all really cool and chill and have been very welcoming to me. When I'm not doing intern duties or helping out people on projects, I do tutorials to help me learn and advance my skills with software. Lately I've been doing a lot of tutorials with Adobe Illustrator to help me learn that. Here are a couple vector images that I made from scratch in Illustrator (of course with the guidance of tutorials).
After I got back from my internship I worked out with Jake and Chordle. I'm sure if I mentioned yet that I've started working out again, but it's really been awesome, and I think I'm getting stronger than I did when I was on P90X even. I guess I have Jake to thank for that, he kind of created this workout plan. Anyways, it's been really awesome, and I'm excited to see how I improve over the semester.
Thursday, February 17
Tonight we had a spectacular group dinner! Jake, Michelle and I wandered around Ralph's trying to decide what we could make a large quantity of for dinner. After a couple debates with Jake about certain foods having too much trans fat and being unhealthy, we decided on taco salad. I must say, it was quite the delish, and it made quite the dish! During our meal we
watched The King's Speech [*warning SPOILERS*]. I really enjoyed it a lot. It was a quality film with a great message. From an aesthetic viewpoint, I certainly did not enjoy their intentional desire to break the "rules" of cinematography. Sure it was artsy, sometimes it was beautiful, but a lot of times it was really distracting and not contributing to the story. But those are really my only complaints about it. The set design, acting, costumes, and writing were incredible. Honestly I have no idea how they made the film for $12mil. The message of the story speaks about many things: rising to the occasion, embracing humility, overcoming fears/obstacles, and maybe most of all the power of speech. What an incredible gift that God gave us the ability to speak. With our mouths we can speak life or death, we can encourage and we can uplift or we can destroy and tear down. Colin Firth's character is not at all thrilled about being King, nor is he thrilled about humbling himself and admitting his errors before Geoffery Rush, but as he sees his world darken on the verge of war, he sees the necessity of him to let go of himself and stand to be the leader that his country needs him to be.Friday, February 18
My internship was pretty awesome today, I got to meet the sound designer and he basically gave the other intern and I like a two hour lesson on sound design. Being the current sound designer for one of our short films, it was way cool getting to see a professional work and get some good practical advice from him on mixing and editing. After the internship I worked out and then we had some friends come over. I was pretty tired though and didn't really feel like hanging out so I just went to bed. Isn't that weird?
Monday, February 21
Yay for President's Day! I got work off! I think that's the first time that I have ever heard of anyone celebrating and getting work off for President's day, but hey, I'm not complaining! Plus Washington was a totally legit prez, and its his bday. Anyways, I kind of just spent the day doing homework anyway.
Here's a special effects test shot that I made to see if I can do this effect in film we may shoot:
If the video above doesn't play, click the link below:
http://www.blogger.com/video-play.mp4?contentId=c148513d816d6320&type=video%2Fmp4
Wednesday, February 23
I was under the assumption that things were improving in life, but I read something online this morning that threw me for a loop. Foreshadowed by my discussion about "The King's Speech" I would like to revisit the comments about the power of words. It's so unbelievable how powerful our words are. And just to think that the moment we say them, or the moment that we type them and press "Send" those words will never ever be taken back. They are burned into history forever. That's why it is so important that we are cautious about the things that we say, and the way that we say them can affect the people that hear them. The bible is so clear on the importance of thinking before you speak and not speaking out of emotion. On the flipside, it is so important that we understand situations and circumstances, before assuming the meaning of something. Satan can easily twist words in our minds to mean something that they never were meant to mean. Speak with wisdom and listen with discernment.
Well whatever worries I had were instantly diminished and put on hold. All of the students were emailed to come into school this evening. None of us knew what it was about. When I got into the classroom I saw all the teachers were there. All of them... something was clearly wrong. Our school director spoke to us and told us that one of our classmates, Joshua Malenke had gotten in an accident that morning and died on impact. I was completely shocked. It was different from any experience with death I've ever had. First of all he was my age, he had a loving girlfriend and family and friends. He had dreams and goals just like me and now he was gone. Secondly, he was unexpectedly gone in a moment. He wasn't recovering in the hospital.
I couldn't go to the hospital and visit him and pray for him. He was just gone. It was a hard thing to accept. We got into small groups and talked about Josh and prayed about everything. When we all separated, my roommates decided to have people come over to our apartment and pray and worship. No one understood this situation, but one thing we understood was that God was the only place we could turn. We had like 15 or 20 people come to our apartment and turned on some worship music and just prayed. (Josh is on the far right in the pic). It makes me realize how quickly life can be given and taken. Any of us could be gone in a moment, and although we should not live in fear of that, we should realize that we are simply not in control, and realize the pertinence of our relationships with people. Are we truly living our lives rightly? Do those of us that we love really know how much they mean to us? These are thoughts that were running through my mind, and I made sure to let those people that are most important in my life know how much they mean to me. I can't even fathom the pain that Josh's family and friends are going through. I don't even want to think about how my family and friends would feel if I died. Please, if you are reading this, please pray for Josh's family, his girlfriend, and everyone who's life he blessed. Pray that God will mourn with them and love them and take care of them.Thursday, February 24
Because of everything we heard about the night before, classes were cancelled for Thursday. Some of us guys felt like it would be good for us to get together for breakfast so we went to one of the apartments and made a big breakfast together. Afterwards we went over to the school where our professors had prepared a type of memorial time for Josh. We worshiped and prayed together and shared stories about Josh. Although we were all still in a lot of shock and confusion, it was a very healing time. Life seems very relentless right now. Later that night I faced my biggest trial yet. I learned some things (unrelated to Josh's death) that have forever changed my life.
Friday, February 25
Today is Holly's 24th birthday! Hopefully her day went better than mine. I can't really determine whether today or the day before is the worst day of my life, because of the things that I had learned last night (once again this is a situation separate from Josh's death). I never imagined that I could feel a pain as terrible as what I feel now, and its probably only a small fraction of the pain that God feels right now. I stumbled through my day at my internship on the verge of tears and came to my apartment to the comfort of my closet. The comfort of the carpet that my face and tears have become so familiar of. I read through like a quarter of the Psalms today, and it brought so much pain to read. I've never related to them so much in my life. I could feel the pain in those words because I now know a piece of that pain. Today, my heart's greatest desires in this world were shattered. I have become nothing. What more does God want of me? I will give it to him, because it has no comparison to what I have lost. No comparison. In the midst of my destruction I lift my hands to worship my God, my king, my savior. I will embrace the overwhelming wall of pain as it destroys me so that I may become nothing and Christ may become everything.
Saturday, February 26
Of course, another rough day. But God is doing a tremendous work in my heart.
I went to Barnes & Noble tonight with some friends. I love Barnes & Noble! I got the book of Aesop's Fables. Although not as spiritually related, they are similar to how Jesus tells parables. I think reading them will benefit me greatly because it is an example of my goals through filmmaking - to tell a story that speaks a message of truth. Later that night we had a bunch of people come over to our apartment again to spend time in prayer and worship. As much as having Josh gone is awful, it truly is bringing many people closer to Christ.
Chordle has been through a lot of crap in his life. He gave me a book that he read in the midst of his greatest pain and trial, so I've been reading this book called Shattered Dreams by Larry Crabb. It's not an enjoyable or comforting read at all, but it speaks a harsh truth that the Bible strongly professes - that life is not about us and the things that we have a right to, it is about giving everything to God and serving him with everything.Sunday, February 27
This is the big day - the 83rd annual Academy Awards. Well since my church is on Hollywood Blvd a couple blocks from the Kodak Theater, we decided to walk over there after church.
They had the whole street shut down and fenced off for like a straight mile. And I swear there was as many police and security there as there are for the flippin president. So we saw the red carpet and all that jazz. It's pretty cool, I enjoy the Oscars but in many ways it's sad too, because so many people here worship the god of Oscar. Not to mention celebrities. But no worries, I won't go on an anti-pop culture rant. 
There was a big Oscar party held at our school that night, tons of free food and awesomeness. We also all voted on who would win what Oscars.
Out of the 24 awards I guessed 16 correctly - not incredible, but I was second highest in our class so I got a free iTunes gift card! No complaints there! Later that night I got to hang out with a good ol' friend from Evangel - Caleb Pyles. He came over and we got to spend some good quality time talking and catching up. Hopefully we'll have some more great opportunities to hang out in the future.Friday, March 4
Work was really awesome today. I was asked to design a logo for a project (and my recently learned Adobe Illustrator skills were put to good use!) Then after that I was asked to create and animate the logo in the Cinema 4D (a 3d modeling/animation program) so my skills taught by Chip Stanek in my 2D/3D Animation class were put to good use. And it was a lot of fun. The video hasn't been produced yet, so I probably can't post my work, but when the video is released I will make sure to put it up here.
Today was Jake's 23rd birthday so a couple friends and I took him out to dinner at this FANTABULOUS restaurant called Maggiano's. It was so awesome. We drove about 30 mins north of Burbank to go to this place and then we ordered the biggest meal ever. (You get free refills of dishes so we would get our plates refilled with food when we were done eating and doggybag it, so we literally left with as much food as we ate... and let me tell you that leftovers are a wonderful thing for a 22 year old bachelor!) It was sooo good though, this restaurant is def one of my new faves. Anyways it was so awesome. I really needed that- to just get away from everything to relax and enjoy a great dinner for 2.5 hours with some of the greatest guys I know. It was a really healing time for me. It has definitely been one of my favorite nights so far in LA.
Saturday, March 5
For a while now I have been wanting to try
my abilities in acting... not because I think I have any natural talent or even a desire to pursue it, but because I think it would be beneficial for me as a director, to better understand the mind of an actor. So anyways, I was given a good opportunity to act in some of my friends' short film. I got to play the main role and it was so much fun. We shot most of it out in the desert and it was worth it just to spend the day there. It made me feel like being back home... dry dirt and mountains. So beautiful! Sunday, March 6
Totally random thing happened at church today: I'm walking out of the sanctuary and I see that the guy in front of me has a "Skinny Improv" messenger bag with him. "What the heck?" I thought to myself, "Are there other Skinny Improv's around? Is it a chain? I thought it was just in Springfield." So I tap him on the shoulder, "Hey are you from Springfield" "Yeah" "Oh cool, yeah I noticed you have a Skinny Improv bag, are you part of the group?" "Yeah!" So anyways, I find out that it's Jeff Houghton, the dude that like founded it, and apparently he just moved to LA. So anyways, it was one of those "small world" moments. Pretty cool!
I must admit that after the trauma I have faced, I kind of wanted to stop writing my blog (surely you can tell that my blogs have been very belated) but I guess that would be in contradiction with the name of my blog. LOL. So I decided to write it anyway, to continue sharing my journey's through life. I guess I could rename my blog to "This Blog Does Not Give Up" lol. Well aside from that dumb joke, I realize that few of my words in this blog (and in future blogs) will be happy. It is by far my darkest season, my lowest valley, and driest desert yet. But if going through this will glorify God, if it reveals his truth and life and love, if it inspires others, than it is worth it. Every morning I wake up in peaceful bliss for a split second and then within moments I relearn the truth. I relearn my position of disbelief and pain. And it really does pretty much happen every morning. I am the weakest I have ever been, yet I am the strongest I have ever been because of God. I am destroyed. I am nothing but the dust which I lay in. But I have been found in the aftermath. In the rubble, in the destruction of Luke Salewski, I have found Christ, and have begun the journey of dying to myself everyday.
A couple days before my world fell apart, the new Hillsong album "Aftermath" was released. I'm pretty sure the timing was perfect. I have been listening to it a ton. The title track "Aftermath" has become my anthem. Here is the song and the lyrics:The skies lay low where You are
On the earth You rest Your feet
Yet the hands that cradle the stars
Are the hands that bled for me
In a moment of glorious surrender
You were broken for all the world to see
Lifted out of the ashes
I am found in the aftermath
Freedom found in Your scars
In Your grace my life redeemed
For You chose to take the sinner's crown
As You placed Your crown on me
In that moment of glorious surrender
Was the moment You broke the chains in me
Lifted out of the ashes
I am found in the aftermath
And in that moment You opened up the heavens
To the broken the beggar and the thief
Lifted out of the wreckage
I find hope in the aftermath
And I know that You're with me
Yes I know that You're with me here
And I know Your love will light the way
Now all I have I count it all as loss
But to know You and to carry the cross
Knowing I'm found
In the light of the aftermath
I'm beginning to see how life is really not about me at all, it's about God. I am here for him and not for me. If there is any good in me, if I ever say anything true or right, it is God, not me. Really the only thing that we have control over is free will. God gives us the ability to make our own choices and then he does the work. I used to think I had a right to this life to everything, but nothing belongs to us. Our bodies, our hearts, and souls, they belong to God, and we are only stewards of them.
I am emotionally sick and devastated. I don't wish this pain on anyone. And I will do whatever I can, whatever the Lord wills me to do, to prevent anyone from ever having to go through this pain or anything worse. I am filled with a new hope for heaven. Sure heaven has always sounded cool, but it's not really an anxious desire of our hearts, not until we see how dark life can be. Now I look forward to the day when I will hear the words, “Now the dwelling of God is with men, and he will live with them. They will be his people, and God himself will be with them and be their God. He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.” (Rev. 21:3-4) Another song I have held to dearly is "You Hold Me Now" by Hillsong. Sometimes I sit in my closet and play this song on my ukulele. I can hardly get through the chorus without bawling my eyes out.
On that day when I see
All that You have for me
When I see You face to face
There surrounded by Your grace
All my fears swept away
In the light of Your embrace
Where Your love is all I need
And forever I am free
Where the streets are made of gold
In Your presence healed and whole
Let the songs of heaven
Rise to You alone
No weeping no hurt or pain
No suffering You hold me now
You hold me now
No darkness no sick or lame
No hiding You hold me now
You hold me now
In this life I will stand
Through my joy and my pain
Knowing there's a greater day
There's a hope that never fails
Where Your Name is lifted high
And forever praises rise
For the glory of Your Name
I'm believing for the day
Where the wars and violence cease
All creation lives in peace
Let the songs of heaven
Rise to You alone
For eternity
All my heart will give
All the glory to Your Name
By grace, in spite of my failures, God gives me the strength to forgive and love. I'm done taking care of myself... and there's not much left to take care of, so I will devote my life to taking care of others. At the end of the day, I lift my broken arms to God and worship him. My heart has been shattered beyond my imagination but the pieces are in his hands. And through my tears and ashes, I will still proclaim that God is good, he is always good.
Tuesday, February 1, 2011
LA Update: Week 4-5
Monday, January 30 -
SO I've got something pretty cool to start the
blog off with, so conveniently those of you with short attention spans (like myself) only have to read the first day mentioned on this blog post and then go back to Facebook so you can sit there and refresh your news feed every couple minutes. Anyways, Monday evening we had a guest speaker come to the school - Doug Jones (Pan's Labyrinth, Hellboy I and II, Quarantine, Silver Surfer, my favorite short film- the Butterfly Circus, and many other films).
He frequently plays roles in films as creatures, monsters, or as a contortionist. He was really a hilarious guy to listen to, and he shared many of his stories that lead him to becoming who he is today.
Tuesday, February 1 -
I really wish I could be at Evangel for the snowstorm. I remember the ice storm my freshman year when we got 2 days off of school- it was so fun. I was just thinking about how weird it is not being there this semester, knowing that I will never come back for school. I will come back for graduation and then I may never see many people again for many many years. It's sad to think about. I miss you guys a lot. It sucks being away from people that you love so much. And not being able to live life with them. Later in the evening we had our bible study, we shared our struggles and prayer requests and spent some time in prayer, it was much needed.
Thursday, February 3 -
Okay soooo I've been really into this band The Black Keys, and if you like Cold War Kids then I think you will love these guys. But listen to their newest album "Brothers" (their older stuff isn't that good).
In class we had an LAFSC alumni and USC Cinematography Grad, Chris Hall, show up and teach us about lighting. It was the best lecture and best hands on session I've ever had on lighting. He gave us a great powerpoint presentation and talked about some great stuff. One thing that I though was really interesting was how he talked about how professional cinematographers often model their lighting styles off of those of Renaissance painters. He said we should examine paintings and figure out what lights to use, how to position and set them up if we were to recreate that scene. Then he actually set up lights in our studio and showed us how to effectively use flags, filters, etc. It was really awesome.
In spite of some cool things at school today, some days just hurt worse than others.... like today.
Friday, February 4 -
So I have a buddy who has an internship at a place where they can literally get any movie they want, even current ones. So this evening we watched 127 Hours [SPOILERS: consider yourself officially "warned"]. I've been wanting to watch it, because I've heard some good things about it, and I remember hearing about the story of Aron Ralston when he was on Dateline and Nightline and Newsline and Frontline, and every other news talk "line."
Anyways the movie was really well done, as always there are some random dumb effects that I really don't like about Danny Boyle's films, but other than that it was really well done. James Franco definitely is worthy of his Oscar nomination, but the story itself I think really spoke to me. Aron has been lead to this rock and has the choice to define his future from this moment on. In those moments of difficulty he realizes how he must change, the people in his life that are most important to him, and that he will lose them and his future with them if he just stays put. I feel like I am in a similar trial. That God has brought me to this rock to change me and teach me. And I can choose to sit and sulk and feel sorry for myself, or I can choose to let God reveal to me what and who matters most in my life, and what I must do to be the person and live the life God has called me to and to be worthy of the people that He has put in my life. I can let this rock destroy me, or I can let God use this rock to change my life for the better.
Saturday, February 5 -
Although I did really want to sleep in today, I decided against myself and went to the school for an all day seminar on financing for film with film investor and author, Jeffrey Taylor. The seminar was incredibly beneficial for me! I really don't know a lot about financing and doing a pitch for an investor, and he really discussed all of those things from a very practical and experienced viewpoint. I learned so much and got some great notes and advice. But I must admit with all those financial terms and etc, my brain was slightly fried 8 hours later when the seminar ended.
Sunday, February 6 -
Ecclesia was awesome again. What's new? Seriously, I just love this church. Or at least the pastor. Today was National Porn Sunday - which is a nationwide movement promoted by XXXchurch(a website focused on helping men and women find freedom some sexual addictions and bondage). The goal of National Porn Sunday is to get churches nationwide to address the prominent problem of pornography amongst Christians. Here's the video provided by XXXChurch: I haven't seen the whole thing, but we watched to beginning couple minutes to introduce it
SO I've got something pretty cool to start the
blog off with, so conveniently those of you with short attention spans (like myself) only have to read the first day mentioned on this blog post and then go back to Facebook so you can sit there and refresh your news feed every couple minutes. Anyways, Monday evening we had a guest speaker come to the school - Doug Jones (Pan's Labyrinth, Hellboy I and II, Quarantine, Silver Surfer, my favorite short film- the Butterfly Circus, and many other films).
He frequently plays roles in films as creatures, monsters, or as a contortionist. He was really a hilarious guy to listen to, and he shared many of his stories that lead him to becoming who he is today. Tuesday, February 1 -
I really wish I could be at Evangel for the snowstorm. I remember the ice storm my freshman year when we got 2 days off of school- it was so fun. I was just thinking about how weird it is not being there this semester, knowing that I will never come back for school. I will come back for graduation and then I may never see many people again for many many years. It's sad to think about. I miss you guys a lot. It sucks being away from people that you love so much. And not being able to live life with them. Later in the evening we had our bible study, we shared our struggles and prayer requests and spent some time in prayer, it was much needed.Thursday, February 3 -
Okay soooo I've been really into this band The Black Keys, and if you like Cold War Kids then I think you will love these guys. But listen to their newest album "Brothers" (their older stuff isn't that good).
In class we had an LAFSC alumni and USC Cinematography Grad, Chris Hall, show up and teach us about lighting. It was the best lecture and best hands on session I've ever had on lighting. He gave us a great powerpoint presentation and talked about some great stuff. One thing that I though was really interesting was how he talked about how professional cinematographers often model their lighting styles off of those of Renaissance painters. He said we should examine paintings and figure out what lights to use, how to position and set them up if we were to recreate that scene. Then he actually set up lights in our studio and showed us how to effectively use flags, filters, etc. It was really awesome.
In spite of some cool things at school today, some days just hurt worse than others.... like today.
Friday, February 4 -
So I have a buddy who has an internship at a place where they can literally get any movie they want, even current ones. So this evening we watched 127 Hours [SPOILERS: consider yourself officially "warned"]. I've been wanting to watch it, because I've heard some good things about it, and I remember hearing about the story of Aron Ralston when he was on Dateline and Nightline and Newsline and Frontline, and every other news talk "line."
Anyways the movie was really well done, as always there are some random dumb effects that I really don't like about Danny Boyle's films, but other than that it was really well done. James Franco definitely is worthy of his Oscar nomination, but the story itself I think really spoke to me. Aron has been lead to this rock and has the choice to define his future from this moment on. In those moments of difficulty he realizes how he must change, the people in his life that are most important to him, and that he will lose them and his future with them if he just stays put. I feel like I am in a similar trial. That God has brought me to this rock to change me and teach me. And I can choose to sit and sulk and feel sorry for myself, or I can choose to let God reveal to me what and who matters most in my life, and what I must do to be the person and live the life God has called me to and to be worthy of the people that He has put in my life. I can let this rock destroy me, or I can let God use this rock to change my life for the better.Saturday, February 5 -
Although I did really want to sleep in today, I decided against myself and went to the school for an all day seminar on financing for film with film investor and author, Jeffrey Taylor. The seminar was incredibly beneficial for me! I really don't know a lot about financing and doing a pitch for an investor, and he really discussed all of those things from a very practical and experienced viewpoint. I learned so much and got some great notes and advice. But I must admit with all those financial terms and etc, my brain was slightly fried 8 hours later when the seminar ended.
Sunday, February 6 -
Ecclesia was awesome again. What's new? Seriously, I just love this church. Or at least the pastor. Today was National Porn Sunday - which is a nationwide movement promoted by XXXchurch(a website focused on helping men and women find freedom some sexual addictions and bondage). The goal of National Porn Sunday is to get churches nationwide to address the prominent problem of pornography amongst Christians. Here's the video provided by XXXChurch: I haven't seen the whole thing, but we watched to beginning couple minutes to introduce it
National Porn Sunday Talk from XXXchurch on Vimeo.
I think it's awesome that churches are addressing this issue, because people NEED help. At Evangel I only know a handful of guys that do not struggle with addictions to pornography and masturbation. But in my life I have seen people freed by the blood of Christ. And WE MUST proclaim God's victory over His people, because too many people, marriages, and relationships with God have been destroyed by this. Too many people go on suffering with this addiction and believing the lie that they will just have to live with it the rest of their life, or that once they find sexual satisfaction in a marriage they won't have these struggles, but that is an absolute lie. Some of my friends and I walked to Yogurtland later on (the frozen yogurt place I mentioned earlier). The great thing about Yogurtland is that you can ask for a sample cup and just keep filling it up with samples. So I didn't even buy anything, I just kept filling up the sample cup. Yum! Later on we had a Superbowl party at our school. It was cool, but man I sure do miss the choir Superbowl party at Sharon's house. I have some great memories there. Anyways, I didn't really care too much for the Superbowl itself (I highly dislike the NFL), the commercials were not that good, and the half time show- wow, absolutely horrendous! But hey, free food! It doesn't get much better than that!
Monday, February 7 -
I think today was the most difficult day I have had in a couple weeks. You assume things get easier with time, but not for me. I think the pain is getting worse. In fact, I know the pain is getting worse. But if it brings me closer to God, if it rids me of filth inside of me, if it fills me with deeper and stronger love, if it changes me for the better, then bring the pain.
Tuesday, February 8 -
Another rough day. On top of that, classes here are incredibly long, and I usually don't mind them, because I learn so much, but being tired didn't help me much through a 3.5 hour class followed by a 4 hour class. Later that night I went to the pool for a while and then to our bible study. God always finds some way to comfort me in my despair.
Wednesday, February 9 -
I've been getting pretty discouraged about not having an internship yet. Most people here have had theirs for at least two weeks now, and I just got turned down (in an email) from the last place I interviewed at. BUT, I know the Lord has a will for me. I know he has the perfect place for me. It's not just hit and miss, and by chance I get an internship at a certain place, it is ordained by God. So this afternoon I had my third interview and was offered the position on the spot! YES! Oh.... you want to know what it is? hmmm.
Thursday, February 10 -
Today in class, my group went on a field trip across the street to a previs (pre-visualization) and postvis company called Third Floor Productions. It was the freaking coolest field trip I have ever been on. They have done the previs for Star Wars Ep III, Alice and Wonderland, Avatar, IronMan 2, Cloverfield, Eagle Eye, Valkyrie, the last two Narnia's, and a bunch more. They showed us their reels and offices and all the things they are working on. They also have a huge new trailer that we got to see that allows for on-set mobile visualization (similar to how Avatar was shot). Anyways it was awesome!
We have a married couple that work at our school and they invite students over every Thursday night for a book study to hang out and eat free food. Can you guess what inspired me to go over there? Free food! And I thought it would be a good opportunity to hang out with some people that I dont usually hang out with a lot, so that was really good.
Friday, February 11 -
First day on the job today! You all are probably wondering where my internship is? It's a production company called Psychic Bunny located right in downtown LA (in the Spring Arts Tower). *cool sidenote* the shots from Inception of Mal on the window sill were shot from our building on our floor! Anyways, Psychic Bunny is a full-service production company (start to finish) that work on commercials, promotional videos, video games, and whatever else. It seems like it's really gonna be awesome, sure I have to do a lot of typical intern jobs, but I get to meet and work with some great people, learn more about professional production and etc. Plus, I have my own desk with a PowerMac with many of my favorite programs installed. I am really excited about this internship. However, I must say that downtown LA is sooo sketch. I think if I stay in LA after this semester I will do all I can to avoid the downtown, unless I'm doing some type of humanitarian efforts. After I got back from my internship I went to work out with my roomies. It was great to be back in the gym and I am stoked to be on a workout plan again. Later we watched Mission Impossible 3. I forgot how great it was. No wonder it's the best Mission Impossible, JJ Abrams directed it!
Saturday, February 12 -
God is speaking and I am listening! The fear that had been building and building has dissipated. I am filled with hope.
After stocking up my kitchen cupboards with food from the 99cent store, I went with my film group to the beach. It was so great! We got to be there for the sunset and then we had a big bonfire burning wood found in dumpsters! And we cooked hot dogs and smores, and just sat around and talked. What a beautiful night! What an awesome day!
Sunday, February 13 -
At Ecclesia today, we finished our series on the importance of the body (our physical bodies). At the end we did baptisms. Man I love baptisms, it's just so awesome seeing people proclaim the change that God has done in their lives as they die to the world and are brought to life in Christ. For lunch we unsuccessfully attempted to grill brats at a park nearby, but that didn't go so well (reminds me of a similar time my freshman year, lol). So we went back to the apartment and used Jake's George Foreman grill. Thank goodness for that!
I promise I was trying to make this blog shorter....it just didn't really work out that way. sorry.
Wow! So much has happened these two weeks. Not just in the things I've been doing, but in the work that God's doing in my life. My roommate Aaron says he has seen such a huge change in me just in the past couple weeks. But it hasn't been easy. In fact it has been the most difficult time of my life (yes, a continuation of that from prior weeks). You know that feeling of emotional pain when it is so severe that you can physically feel it? You know that feeling of fear when you can constantly feel your heart beating, and you can literally hear your pulse in your ears? Yeah, that's a combination of how I've felt. And it has been increasing more and more. I have tried so hard to fight that fear, but I kept looking to God and he pulled me through. I can't explain it, but God has done a miracle in my life (well, more than one obviously!) Any of you guys that really know me, know that I hate growing up, and I try to hold onto the past with everything I can. For the first time in years, I can honestly say that I am excited about the future. I am seriously SO stoked about what God is going to do in my life. I'm excited for tomorrow, because tomorrow I will be that much closer to God. I'm excited for this time next week, because by this time next week, I will have had 7 days to surrender more of myself to God and live those days entirely for him. That is exciting. And there's a couple other things I'm pretty excited about too, I'm sure you'll hear more about that fairly soon. Let me just leave you with this: "Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see." Hebrews 11:1 "And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us." Romans 5:5. It is SO worth it to hope. When we hope for something it is ALWAYS taking a risk, but when we commit our hope to God, we will never be disappointed, because our hope is in Him. "Wait for the LORD; be strong and take heart and wait for the LORD." Psalm 27:14.
But look to God because you love him, not because you want to get something from him. There's nothing wrong with asking God for something, but sometimes we worship the hand of God more than the heart of God. As Oswald Chambers profoundly says, "Spiritual lust causes me to demand an answer from God, instead of seeking God Himself who gives the answer." Seek God above all else in your life and everything else will fall into place. I must sound incredibly hopeful and optimistic right now, because honestly, I am. God is SO good!
Here is a great verse and a great song:
And the great dragon was cast out, that old serpent, called the Devil, and Satan, which deceiveth the whole world: he was cast out into the earth, and his angels were cast out with him. And I heard a loud voice saying in heaven, Now is come salvation, and strength, and the kingdom of our God, and the power of his Christ: for the accuser of our brethren is cast down, which accused them before our God day and night. And they overcame him by the blood of the Lamb, and by the word of their testimony; and they loved not their lives unto the death. Romans 12:9-11 (KJV)
Monday, January 24, 2011
LA Update: Week 2-3
Welcome to the second installment of my blog! Aren't you so excited?!!! Aren't you mediocrely excited? Right on! So in case you didn't get the hint, many words in my blogs are hyperlinked to either pictures or websites of places or things that I am referring to in my blog.
Monday, January 17 -
Happy MLK DAY!!!!! Wooot!
Tuesday, January 18 -
This evening we had a guest speaker come to our school. His name is Ken Wales, producer of Amazing Grace (2006), the Christy TV series (1994), and many others. He was really great, he shared stories about his life and experiences and many things that God has taught him along the way. It was so encouraging to hear from a person who has been very involved in the film industry, but has stayed close to God, avoided compromise, and desired to show God through his work.
Wednesday, January whatever -
Through one of those friend of a friend of a friend situations, I was invited to an ACE (American Cinema Editors) Lecture Series in a private screening theater on the NBC/Universal lot. The three of us that went felt slightly out of place since there were only like 50 people in the audience - who were all interns or intern applicants at ACE.... whoa! There was a panel of about 10 assistant editors and editors for various TV shows and films who discussed their jobs and how they got there, and how certain things work within the industry.
Saturday, January 22 -
Happy Birthday Andrew!!! For Andrew's Bday, a bunch of us guys drove like 30 minutes to some random Donut place in one of the 3 or so Little Korea sections of town. Have you ever thought about how in American English, the word "donut" can either be spelled "donut" or "doughnut"? Both are correct, and both are incredibly delicious! Well after the donut place we went back to our apartments and then headed for the beach. Pretty much half of our school showed up there, which was funny. 
The water was super cold but I went in it up to my waist anyway, just cause I'm that much of a man. But it was a great day, Gordon and I sat in the sand and talked, then we all threw the frisbee and played some sand football. After that some of us left and went to In-N-Out and ate a dish that was quite the delish. We got back and cleaned up and then my room full of guys went over to one of the girls rooms to play Mafia. It was pretty cool!
Sunday, January 23 -
Gordon invited me to attend church with him at Reality LA. The worship was AWESOME. It was totally my style of worship. You know the kind that a Hillsong and Planetshakers cover band would do (inside joke with Trevor Ekanger and band). No but really it was great, and they spend a lot of time just worshipping freely after the message to respond, very different, very awesome. 
Later that day I went hiking with Michelle and Drew. We hiked right around the Hollywood sign. It was a lot of fun, and SUCH a beautiful view. For those of you in Idaho, it reminded me of LA's version of table rock. We got there just in time for the sunset and then just chilled there for a bit. It was nice to have peace and quiet finally. After we left their we went straight to Mosaic church.
They rent out a nightclub in downtown LA. It was kind of weird being in a place like that and they have like a live DJ playing while you're coming in, but other than that the service was pretty normal. We heard a good message about not living on bread alone but on the word of God, and how God provides for us daily in so many ways if we just rely on Him and ask him to help us.
Monday, January 23 -
After doing some errands throughout the day, I went longboarding with Anson through a nearby park. It was SO much fun, like the sidewalk just winds around and you get going pretty fast, but it was awesome- until we ended up right in front of a security guard who told us we couldn't skateboard. So then we walked to the street and stood there and talked for an hour or so about life and all. My roommate, Dan, randomly appeared before us.... well I guess he more so kind of walked up to us. Then when we all got back we went swimming at the pool! Which, if I have not mentioned before is AWESOME! The pool is heated upwards of 80 degrees and the hot tub is 104 and both are really nice.
Tuesday, January 24 -
So I found out that I didn't get the director position on the film. Yeah, I was a little bummed, but like I said in my last blog, I really just want to be where God wants me to be, and he obviously didn't have that in his plan. I'm just glad he's taking care of me in the way that HE knows is best, otherwise I'd always be trying get everything I want, when I want it. My position on the short film is sound design. I actually picked this as my second choice because it is the thing that I am least skilled in out of the positions. It's not my favorite, but I think I will learn the most, and may very well learn to love it. I am also incredibly excited to work with the soundtrack for the film, because as you know, I do love music. Well I had an interview this morning for my internship. It's at a place called Buddha Jones, they make theatrical trailers and tv spots for features.
You can see on their website all the trailers they have done, very well done, I might add. The interview went really well so I look forward to hearing back from them. Also for your enjoyment I have added and for my pleasure of being random, I have inserted a picture here of the view of LA from the top of my school (yeah the security guard took me and some friends up there!)
Wednesday, January 26 -
Last week I was absent from the first of our Bible studies, but this week I was there, and we had a few guys from other apartments show up too. It was pretty awesome, we spent time sharing our testimonies and reading the word and talking about which parts of it really spoke to us. I'm excited to see where things go with our Bible study over the semester. We'll be reading through Psalms and John.
Heres a video of my apartment:
if the video doesn't play, CLICK THIS LINK.
Friday, January 28 -
I've been getting a little discouraged because almost everyone else seems to have their internships all set up, and I don't. I was hoping to here back from the place I interviewed and still hadn't. Well anyways, I finally get a phone call. It wasn't from the place I interviewed, but it was at a different place that we had sent my resume to (Skip Film, also a trailer house - meaning they make movie trailers, not live in a trailer house). They asked me if I could come in for an interview on Monday. Hopefully one of these two will work out for me! With all the free time that I've had while everyone else is at their internships, I've been going over to the school and working on touching up some stuff on my short film, as well as working on the DVD for it. I've been getting a lot better at After Effects, because I've been spending so much time on it! Praise the Lord for Andrew Kramer and Videocopilot! Later in the evening I just hung out with my roomies, had some good conversations with them, then we felt like watching the Dark Knight and stayed up till like 4 talking - Yay for college!
Saturday, January 29 -
Today was AWESOME! The guys did our annual community breakfast together again. We went over to another apartment and made pancakes and eggs for breakfast. It was pretty cool we had like 5 guys more than the last time. I guess Saturday morning breakfast is a big hit! After that some of us walked to a nearby park and played basketball and hung out there for a while. Later on we drove to the Universal CityWalk, which is basically like a big outdoor mall with shops, restaurants, etc. We ate their and hung out for a while. I had some delish froyo at this place called yogurtland, its super popular here, its basically EXACTLY like Orange Leaf.
Went to see Tron: Legacy in IMAX 3D. Sure, story-wise it's no Oscar material, but I absolutely loved it, especially being a guy that is very partial to visual effects. I don't know how I guy could watch that movie and not want to visit the Grid and get a lightcycle. Later on, I went over to another friends apartment and chilled their for a bit. Btw I found the Tron game online, in case you are dying to play it.
Sunday, January 30 -
Most difficult day getting out of bed yet! I went back to Ecclesia today (the first church I visited here). The sermon was over 1 Corinthians 6 and sin that separates us from God, "And that is what some of you were. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God." 1 Cor 6:11. Covered pretty extensively was the biblical stance on homosexuality, and as you can imagine, it was rather intense - you could definitely feel the tension, and that's no surprise considering that we are in Hollywood and in California. BUT I would say that it was the best presentation of a Christian stance on the issue that I have ever heard. Click this link to listen to the sermon (the one labeled "symmetry 1/30/11). Another reason I really like this pastor is because he leaves out opinion and just gives straight scripture. After church we had some people over to our apartment for lunch and watched a movie. And then after I napped for a while we started the Fellowship of the Ring (extended edition of course) we are going to watch them all in a row (consecutive days not same day!) Then went to the pool for a swim and the hot tub was awesome cause it was a cooler day today.
Los Angeles
So heres little bit about Los Angeles for you: Gas is an average of about $3.50 a gallon, however if you drive about 2 blocks you can usually find a gas station that is 30 cents more expensive. The climate is pretty dry, about 70 degrees clear skies almost everyday and in the upper 50's at night. The people are incredibly diverse - on an average day you will see about any race and social class. Especially Koreans and Jews in the area I live. Overall, the people I come in contact have been pretty nice. You know those days when you drive and you "almost" get in a car accident but don't? That's literally like every time you drive here. Oh and EVERYONE has nice cars here. I have maybe seen a handful of cars that look as bad as mine since I've been here. And how about the film industry? In case you didn't know, it is mostly owned by Jewish people (I probably sound like I'm making racial jokes and stereotypes, but trust me, I'm not). To give an example of how difficult entering the industry is, lets look at SAG (Screen Actors Guild). SAG represents about 120,000 members worldwide, about 70,000 in LA, and as if membership isn't difficult enough, only about 50 of them are big name stars. Unfortunately its pretty much the same story for the other Above-the-Line guilds here - DGA, WGA. (Below the Line guilds are much easier to enter). WGA has over 50,000 submissions a year and only a small fraction are sold and an even smaller fraction produced. A guest speaker told us that the chances of us becoming a director or writer is similar to a high school basketball player getting into the NBA. Discouraging, huh? Well be encouraged because God will take you to where he has called you. Your plans and desires may fail, but God's will not, so place you plans and goals on him. Proverbs 16:3
Commit to the LORD whatever you do,
and he will establish your plans.Proverbs 19:21
Many are the plans in a person’s heart,
but it is the LORD’s purpose that prevails. If your plans are based on serving the Lord, then you don't have to worry about statistics and the odds against you. The Lord will take you to wherever he has called you. But don't just think of this in terms of your job, think of it in everything. Even your little plans, commit them to God and he will bless them. Commit your desires, goals, new years resolutions, friendships, relationships to God and he will guide them. Our plans may fail, but His will NEVER fail and nothing can stand against them.
Me
In spite of all the things that I've given God and had no ability to hold onto, I must confess that I still have held onto fear. Fear of certain situations not working out the way that I hope it does. Fear that my heart will break more than it already has. After realizing how consumed with that fear I had become I realized I must entirely surrender it to God. Although my circumstances are new, my struggle with fear is nothing new. However, I remembered that over summer when I was on choir tour, I was having a deep discussion with one of the families that I stayed with, and I confessed the fearfulness that I struggle with. One of them said to me (this is a paraphrase, obviously) "We often think that the opposite of fear is faith, but it's not. The way to conquer fear is not just by gaining more faith, but being 'made perfect in love.' She gave me the verse - "There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear: because fear hath torment. He that feareth is not made perfect in love." 1 John 4:18. I still experience pain everyday, but it drives me closer to my Creator, the One that I can completely rely on and trust. I am striving to make him and keep him my greatest desire above all else. And wherever you readers are at, I encourage you to do the same. I love you all!
If you read all this I am thoroughly impressed with your patience! Don't worry, I'm sure my blogs will get shorter over time.
Monday, January 17 -
Happy MLK DAY!!!!! Wooot!
Tuesday, January 18 -
This evening we had a guest speaker come to our school. His name is Ken Wales, producer of Amazing Grace (2006), the Christy TV series (1994), and many others. He was really great, he shared stories about his life and experiences and many things that God has taught him along the way. It was so encouraging to hear from a person who has been very involved in the film industry, but has stayed close to God, avoided compromise, and desired to show God through his work.
Wednesday, January whatever -
Through one of those friend of a friend of a friend situations, I was invited to an ACE (American Cinema Editors) Lecture Series in a private screening theater on the NBC/Universal lot. The three of us that went felt slightly out of place since there were only like 50 people in the audience - who were all interns or intern applicants at ACE.... whoa! There was a panel of about 10 assistant editors and editors for various TV shows and films who discussed their jobs and how they got there, and how certain things work within the industry.
Saturday, January 22 -
Happy Birthday Andrew!!! For Andrew's Bday, a bunch of us guys drove like 30 minutes to some random Donut place in one of the 3 or so Little Korea sections of town. Have you ever thought about how in American English, the word "donut" can either be spelled "donut" or "doughnut"? Both are correct, and both are incredibly delicious! Well after the donut place we went back to our apartments and then headed for the beach. Pretty much half of our school showed up there, which was funny. 
The water was super cold but I went in it up to my waist anyway, just cause I'm that much of a man. But it was a great day, Gordon and I sat in the sand and talked, then we all threw the frisbee and played some sand football. After that some of us left and went to In-N-Out and ate a dish that was quite the delish. We got back and cleaned up and then my room full of guys went over to one of the girls rooms to play Mafia. It was pretty cool!Sunday, January 23 -
Gordon invited me to attend church with him at Reality LA. The worship was AWESOME. It was totally my style of worship. You know the kind that a Hillsong and Planetshakers cover band would do (inside joke with Trevor Ekanger and band). No but really it was great, and they spend a lot of time just worshipping freely after the message to respond, very different, very awesome. 
Later that day I went hiking with Michelle and Drew. We hiked right around the Hollywood sign. It was a lot of fun, and SUCH a beautiful view. For those of you in Idaho, it reminded me of LA's version of table rock. We got there just in time for the sunset and then just chilled there for a bit. It was nice to have peace and quiet finally. After we left their we went straight to Mosaic church.
They rent out a nightclub in downtown LA. It was kind of weird being in a place like that and they have like a live DJ playing while you're coming in, but other than that the service was pretty normal. We heard a good message about not living on bread alone but on the word of God, and how God provides for us daily in so many ways if we just rely on Him and ask him to help us. 
Monday, January 23 -
After doing some errands throughout the day, I went longboarding with Anson through a nearby park. It was SO much fun, like the sidewalk just winds around and you get going pretty fast, but it was awesome- until we ended up right in front of a security guard who told us we couldn't skateboard. So then we walked to the street and stood there and talked for an hour or so about life and all. My roommate, Dan, randomly appeared before us.... well I guess he more so kind of walked up to us. Then when we all got back we went swimming at the pool! Which, if I have not mentioned before is AWESOME! The pool is heated upwards of 80 degrees and the hot tub is 104 and both are really nice.
Tuesday, January 24 -
So I found out that I didn't get the director position on the film. Yeah, I was a little bummed, but like I said in my last blog, I really just want to be where God wants me to be, and he obviously didn't have that in his plan. I'm just glad he's taking care of me in the way that HE knows is best, otherwise I'd always be trying get everything I want, when I want it. My position on the short film is sound design. I actually picked this as my second choice because it is the thing that I am least skilled in out of the positions. It's not my favorite, but I think I will learn the most, and may very well learn to love it. I am also incredibly excited to work with the soundtrack for the film, because as you know, I do love music. Well I had an interview this morning for my internship. It's at a place called Buddha Jones, they make theatrical trailers and tv spots for features.
You can see on their website all the trailers they have done, very well done, I might add. The interview went really well so I look forward to hearing back from them. Also for your enjoyment I have added and for my pleasure of being random, I have inserted a picture here of the view of LA from the top of my school (yeah the security guard took me and some friends up there!)Wednesday, January 26 -
Last week I was absent from the first of our Bible studies, but this week I was there, and we had a few guys from other apartments show up too. It was pretty awesome, we spent time sharing our testimonies and reading the word and talking about which parts of it really spoke to us. I'm excited to see where things go with our Bible study over the semester. We'll be reading through Psalms and John.
Heres a video of my apartment:
if the video doesn't play, CLICK THIS LINK.
Friday, January 28 -
I've been getting a little discouraged because almost everyone else seems to have their internships all set up, and I don't. I was hoping to here back from the place I interviewed and still hadn't. Well anyways, I finally get a phone call. It wasn't from the place I interviewed, but it was at a different place that we had sent my resume to (Skip Film, also a trailer house - meaning they make movie trailers, not live in a trailer house). They asked me if I could come in for an interview on Monday. Hopefully one of these two will work out for me! With all the free time that I've had while everyone else is at their internships, I've been going over to the school and working on touching up some stuff on my short film, as well as working on the DVD for it. I've been getting a lot better at After Effects, because I've been spending so much time on it! Praise the Lord for Andrew Kramer and Videocopilot! Later in the evening I just hung out with my roomies, had some good conversations with them, then we felt like watching the Dark Knight and stayed up till like 4 talking - Yay for college!
Saturday, January 29 -
Today was AWESOME! The guys did our annual community breakfast together again. We went over to another apartment and made pancakes and eggs for breakfast. It was pretty cool we had like 5 guys more than the last time. I guess Saturday morning breakfast is a big hit! After that some of us walked to a nearby park and played basketball and hung out there for a while. Later on we drove to the Universal CityWalk, which is basically like a big outdoor mall with shops, restaurants, etc. We ate their and hung out for a while. I had some delish froyo at this place called yogurtland, its super popular here, its basically EXACTLY like Orange Leaf.
Went to see Tron: Legacy in IMAX 3D. Sure, story-wise it's no Oscar material, but I absolutely loved it, especially being a guy that is very partial to visual effects. I don't know how I guy could watch that movie and not want to visit the Grid and get a lightcycle. Later on, I went over to another friends apartment and chilled their for a bit. Btw I found the Tron game online, in case you are dying to play it. Sunday, January 30 -
Most difficult day getting out of bed yet! I went back to Ecclesia today (the first church I visited here). The sermon was over 1 Corinthians 6 and sin that separates us from God, "And that is what some of you were. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God." 1 Cor 6:11. Covered pretty extensively was the biblical stance on homosexuality, and as you can imagine, it was rather intense - you could definitely feel the tension, and that's no surprise considering that we are in Hollywood and in California. BUT I would say that it was the best presentation of a Christian stance on the issue that I have ever heard. Click this link to listen to the sermon (the one labeled "symmetry 1/30/11). Another reason I really like this pastor is because he leaves out opinion and just gives straight scripture. After church we had some people over to our apartment for lunch and watched a movie. And then after I napped for a while we started the Fellowship of the Ring (extended edition of course) we are going to watch them all in a row (consecutive days not same day!) Then went to the pool for a swim and the hot tub was awesome cause it was a cooler day today.
Los Angeles
So heres little bit about Los Angeles for you: Gas is an average of about $3.50 a gallon, however if you drive about 2 blocks you can usually find a gas station that is 30 cents more expensive. The climate is pretty dry, about 70 degrees clear skies almost everyday and in the upper 50's at night. The people are incredibly diverse - on an average day you will see about any race and social class. Especially Koreans and Jews in the area I live. Overall, the people I come in contact have been pretty nice. You know those days when you drive and you "almost" get in a car accident but don't? That's literally like every time you drive here. Oh and EVERYONE has nice cars here. I have maybe seen a handful of cars that look as bad as mine since I've been here. And how about the film industry? In case you didn't know, it is mostly owned by Jewish people (I probably sound like I'm making racial jokes and stereotypes, but trust me, I'm not). To give an example of how difficult entering the industry is, lets look at SAG (Screen Actors Guild). SAG represents about 120,000 members worldwide, about 70,000 in LA, and as if membership isn't difficult enough, only about 50 of them are big name stars. Unfortunately its pretty much the same story for the other Above-the-Line guilds here - DGA, WGA. (Below the Line guilds are much easier to enter). WGA has over 50,000 submissions a year and only a small fraction are sold and an even smaller fraction produced. A guest speaker told us that the chances of us becoming a director or writer is similar to a high school basketball player getting into the NBA. Discouraging, huh? Well be encouraged because God will take you to where he has called you. Your plans and desires may fail, but God's will not, so place you plans and goals on him. Proverbs 16:3
Commit to the LORD whatever you do,
and he will establish your plans.Proverbs 19:21
Many are the plans in a person’s heart,
but it is the LORD’s purpose that prevails. If your plans are based on serving the Lord, then you don't have to worry about statistics and the odds against you. The Lord will take you to wherever he has called you. But don't just think of this in terms of your job, think of it in everything. Even your little plans, commit them to God and he will bless them. Commit your desires, goals, new years resolutions, friendships, relationships to God and he will guide them. Our plans may fail, but His will NEVER fail and nothing can stand against them.
Me
In spite of all the things that I've given God and had no ability to hold onto, I must confess that I still have held onto fear. Fear of certain situations not working out the way that I hope it does. Fear that my heart will break more than it already has. After realizing how consumed with that fear I had become I realized I must entirely surrender it to God. Although my circumstances are new, my struggle with fear is nothing new. However, I remembered that over summer when I was on choir tour, I was having a deep discussion with one of the families that I stayed with, and I confessed the fearfulness that I struggle with. One of them said to me (this is a paraphrase, obviously) "We often think that the opposite of fear is faith, but it's not. The way to conquer fear is not just by gaining more faith, but being 'made perfect in love.' She gave me the verse - "There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear: because fear hath torment. He that feareth is not made perfect in love." 1 John 4:18. I still experience pain everyday, but it drives me closer to my Creator, the One that I can completely rely on and trust. I am striving to make him and keep him my greatest desire above all else. And wherever you readers are at, I encourage you to do the same. I love you all!
If you read all this I am thoroughly impressed with your patience! Don't worry, I'm sure my blogs will get shorter over time.
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