The Truffle

I thought back in September that I would never get the chance to ever see New Orleans. Thankfully, I was wrong. Le Sweetie suggested a fun-filled four-day weekend at NOLA's Jazz and Heritage Festival, and I jummped at the chance. Just one thing... "Where will we be staying?" I asked Le Sweetie. "In a hotel," he replied. Nice. "A hotel where?" "In the French Quarter, which wasn't damaged so badly," was his reply. Driving to and from the festival grounds, I saw lots of beautiful old houses reduced to hollowed-out husks, the words TFW scrawled in red paint on the front. I saw other houses completely destroyed, and the occasional FOR SALE or FOR RENT sign (good luck guys). I saw debris scattered on the lawns and piled up on the curb. The bus driver commented--somewhat snarkily--that the presence of all the debris stacked up in front meant that FEMA was actually doing a good job of clearing away the rubble. Speaking of FEMA, everywhere ...

Rival dwarf KISS tribute bands duke it out.

The LA times kicks things off with a headline that could guarantee nightmares for its readers: "Bush's third term." Relax kids. Nobody's repealed any congressional amendments. Anyway, the paper suggests the same thing that several men in uniform did--namely, that Rumsfeld be fired. But then they take things a step further: Suppose Bush didn't stop there. Suppose he also asked Cheney, his mentor and friend but an even more polarizing figure than Rumsfeld, to step down. We know the objections. The vice president is not a mere presidential appointee but an elected constitutional officer. In choosing a replacement, Bush might be pressured to predetermine the outcome of the 2008 Republican presidential race by anointing one would-be successor over another. Throwing Cheney overboard would be an implicit repudiation of the excessively hawkish foreign policy with which the vice president, even more than Rumsfeld, has been associated. Which is why Bush isn't going...

Take, for example, former CIA analyst Larry Johnson. Johnson knew Valerie Plame back in the CIA. Last July, Johnson found himself wishing aloud that Senator Howard Baker was still in office and that at least some Republican "would stand up and call the ugly dog the ugly dog that it is." Johnson is a registered Republican and comes across as an old-school conservative, one who believes in restraint and keeping the government out of people's faces. So what's he got to say about Bush's meeting with Hu Jintao? I'm not a hardened Cold Warrior who believes we should not deal with China. But, I am an old fashioned conservative who believes that the United States was supposed to offer an alternative model of government to the authoritarian nations, like China and the old Soviet Union. *** Where are we today? A protester is forcibly removed from the White House grounds. The White House, a symbol of the American people, became a backdrop for the new authoritarianis...

Via (parenthetical remarks), we find that a cannibalistic killer's been getting mucho hits for his blog, Strange Things Are Afoot at the Circle K. Out of morbid curiosity, I took a look at the blog and found it to be a collection of weird news stories and headlines he found on the Web. Nothing gory or violent there...until the guy was arrested. Now, his comments section has exploded, as visitors hope he fries in an electric chair or otherwise dies a horrible death. So I don't think our psychopathic murder has much potential for a second career as a professional blogger. For one thing, who'd want to advertise on his site?

The Worst President in History? is the cover story, by historian Sean Wilentz. Despite the title, this is not not not not NOT some vitriolic volley of anti-Bush rhetoric, but rather a thoughtfully written, well-rounded examination of the Bush presidency and where it went wrong. Wilentz points out that this country's greatest presidents--Washington, FDR, Lincoln--led the country through the most tumultuous moments in its history while unifying its people. He compares this to Bush's fellow candidates for "worst president": James Buchanan, Andrew Johnson, and Herbert Hoover. And he offers the best summation of Bush's failings in this passage: Calamitous presidents, faced with enormous difficulties -- Buchanan, Andrew Johnson, Hoover and now Bush -- have divided the nation, governed erratically and left the nation worse off. In each case, different factors contributed to the failure: disastrous domestic policies, foreign-policy blunders and military setbacks, exe...

Perez Hilton presents the first ever portrait of TomKat and baby, with some fellow Scientologists. Including Rob Thomas. Wait--what's Rob Thomas doing here, anyway? I'm waiting for, say, Courtney Love or Britney Spears to discover Scientology. C'mon, you know it's coming. Of course, I also suspect that one of these days Madonna, in her never-ending spiritual quest, will convert to Islam and change her name to Madonna Ali. Whaddya mean, I've got too much time on my hands?

I remember seeing a photograph a few months back of Natasha Lyonne looking like a sad, prematurely aging bag lady. Aaaaaaaack! She was so great in Slums of Beverly Hills and American Pie ! She can really, really act! And she's not a famewhore like Lindsay Lohan! Well, it turns out she's a heroin addict. Shit. Not again. Plus, she made her ex-roommate's life a living hell and she's got emotional and/or mental problems. Meanwhile, her dad says there's nothing wrong with her at all. (These young actresses/pop stars always have fucked up, wimpy, or delusional dads. Surprise surprise.) Anyway, I just read the other day that she checked herself into rehab in Malibu. Which could be a hopeful sign. I mean, I love celebrity snark as much as anyone else, but this chick has waaaaaay too much talent to let herself go to ruin. Here's hoping she can get herself clean.

Tell me, who didn't see this one coming? Priceless quote: Any day I'm expecting to hear that Hurricane Katrina happened because Clinton seeded the clouds. Mighty Middle has his own take, using a picture of several loose screws to illustrate his point.

From the Defeatists' Crusader Axe comes word of a John Lennon seance. Which apparently does not feature Yoko and Sean. Who knows if it was even authorized by Yoko? But that's not the really sacreligious part. No, the really offensive moment is when our dear Crusader proclaims: "They [the Beatles] didn't really do all that great music." Say what (says the person whose parents played the Beatles' red and blue albums nonstop when she was a tyke)?

Featuring this priceless quote: Good Lord, are we Texans ever fortunate that Tom DeLay wasn't at the Alamo. If he had been, when Col. William B. Travis drew that line in the sand, Tom would have said, "Are you crazy? I'm moving to Northern Virginia." (Via Juanita's. )

Starring Kevin "The Human Punchline" Federline! From the Daily News: We in the gossip biz have been blamed for a lot of things recently, but even we have to draw the line somewhere. In the May issue of Spin, Kevin Federline lays the responsibility for his upcoming musical efforts at the feet of the press. "I don't have a choice. It's not like I can go and do construction, start building houses in Malibu," explains Mr. Britney Spears. "They are forcing me to do this, and I am glad they are. I am more than happy to do it." Yes, you can blame the media for "Popozao"! K-Fed sez so!

Newt Gingrich's recent call for the US to skedaddle from Iraq has been met with chortles and shaking heads. Wow. NEWT. GINGRICH. SAYS. WE. SHOULD. LEAVE. IRAQ. The Mighty Middle asks how Little Green Freeper Limpballs are going to take this short of having their brains go pop. Once they could just call all the war critics traitors, secure in the belief that they were only denigrating liberals Now on the traitors list: General Zinni, General Newbold, Colin Powell, Francis Fukuyama, Chuck Hagel, Newt Gingrich . . . and, of course, about 60% of the American people. Of course, war critics on the right have always been there; one of those most notable was Brent Scowcroft, former national security advisor to President Ford and Daddy Bush...and one of Daddy Bush's bestest buds. And on the conservative libertarian side, you have the folks at Antiwar.com. The Little Green Freeperballs just didn't want to acknowledge this unpleasant fact. Glenn Greenwald isn't ready...

A president is supposed to be the guy you want to cheer as he throws the first pitch of the season. Cheney, on the other hand...

One lesson Bush learned from his daddy: Pick a vice presidential candidate who'll offer "assasination insurance," so to speak. During Bush 41's administration, many, many Americans joked that Dan Quayle was there to ensure that nobody tried to do a John Hinckley Jr. Similarly, the thought of Cheney stepping into the Oval Office following the possible impeachment of Bush 43 gives people the willies. It could be a lot worse...right? Except that at least one editorialist has noted that when Bush goes, Cheney goes with him. Part of the problem of the veep having such unprecedented political power is that he has to share the blame for the unprecedented number of scandals. If/when Bush steps down, Cheney would probably resign for "health reasons," leaving us with President Dennis Hastert to bumble his way through the next two years or so. As the editorial points out, Hastert is in hot water himself because of his connections to--who else?--Jack Abramoff. I...

Your Theme Song is Back in Black by AC/DC "Back in black, I hit the sack, I've been too long, I'm glad to be back" Things sometimes get really crazy for you, and sometimes you have to get away from all the chaos. But each time you stage your comeback, it's even better than the last! What's Your Theme Song?

It's Sunday. Alas, I slept through the morning, which means I missed the Sunday blabfests. This means I missed watching the bloviators on the right face questions about Leakgate. Ah well. I have a column coming up in a local paper this week, and I've submitted another piece to another paper. And things are still going well with Le Sweetie. Can't complain there. On the other hand, Sy Hersh reports that Bush is planning to nuke Iran. Oh crap. This isn't good. At all.

The other day I asked who these people were among the 36 percent who still approved of Bush. Here's a clue, offered by a Kansas native who's run into plenty of 36 percenters lately.

This dude explains how it's done. Via Democratic Underground.

More here. This is one badass cat.

That's Bush's new approval rating. And who are these people who still approve?

Today's press conference has Scotty boy repeating himself. Q: "What can you tell us about this leak case?" A: "This is an ongoing legal proceeding." Q: "Did the president authorize it?" A: "As I said before, it's an ongoing legal proceeding. It was mentioned in a filing by Patrick Fitzgerald." Q: "The president has been very critical of leaks himself, though." A: "As I mentioned before, it was mentioned in a filing by Patrick Fitzgerald. I can't comment on it. It's related to an ongoing legal proceeding." Q: "When was this information considered to be declassified anyway?" A: "Again, it's an ongoing legal proceeding, in a filing by Patrick Fitzgerald, and I can't comment on it." Q: "Can you give us the date it was classified?" A: "I can't. It's related to an ongoing legal proceeding. I can't comment on it." Q: "Is the president really okay w...

Scooter says Bush gave the go-ahead to leak information about Iraq. Now what's that about keeping this nation secure?

Tom Delay wasn't content with just resigning from Congress. He wasn't satisfied with blaming the Democrats for making his re-election "a referendum on me." He wasn't going to go quietly in the night, lest he get his ass whooped by Nick Lampson. No. He had to have his supporters (yes, believe it or not, he has supporters) crash Lampson's press conference and physically assault Lampson supporters. Including a 69-year-old woman. Who are these mouthbreathers who still think Delay is the bee's knees? And how do they justify a man could be spending his days in an orange prison uniform soon? Good question. From that same linky-winky: Albert calmly asked her, "Why would you do that? He doesn't stand with you. He cut and ran from you." Good point, Albert. She didn't have an answer.