Thursday, August 20, 2015
That bitter sweet decission. (not a post for men to read)
It's been a while since I've posted! I have been so busy with summer vacation, back to school and loving on my kids! I am proud to say Georgie is now 7 months old and I could not be more obsessed with her. I just enjoy her so much! She's a perfect baby, I have no complaints......except one. Now brace yourself because I will be talking about nipples. She has been a great nurser since she's been born. But a few weeks ago she got her two bottom teeth.....ouch. She started to bite, HARD. I tried everything "they" suggest, pulled her away, screaming, (to scare her), a little bop on the mouth....nothing was working. She loved to bite. I was getting open sores, she bit so hard. Then she would bit on my open sores.......NOPE!!!! I gave it a good two weeks to see if she would stop and my poor nips just could not take any more torture. It truly broke my heart to think about having to stop nursing her. I really love doing it. I had a great supply, for the first time out of 5 kids, and I just really loved the time we had together. But really, when it came down to it, and my bleeding nipples.........I was done. Wouldn't you be? Give me some validation!! So I decided to start pumping to help my milk go down. I spread out the pumping sessions longer and longer so my body would get the hint. And it did. I could have kept my supply up by pumping every couple hours and giving her the milk, but I have done that before and it is really, really difficult. I had to just make the decision to be done. My heart ached!!!! For about a day. I cried, for about 30 seconds. Then I realized how fabulous it is when you stop nursing!!!! FREEDOM!!!!!! I can wear whatever bra I want!!! I can wear dresses!!! I don't have to try to nurse in public!!! I can start actually working out! I can eat whatever I want!! It sorta feels like you get your body back. Which you do, because when your pregnant, it's not yours, when you're nursing, it's not yours either. I have gone two days without pumping and I feel great. I literally have gallons of frozen milk in my deep freezer so she is still getting breastmilk. And when that runs out she'll probably be around 9 months old and that, my friends, is a great accomplishment. It's a very hard decision to stop nursing. It's very bitter sweet. But I feel okay about it now and I'm really really grateful and proud of my body for being able to do what it does. Now here are some ridiculously cute pictures of my baby.
Tuesday, March 24, 2015
Baby #5 must haves!!!
You would think that by now I would have everything I need for a new baby. And essentially I do. But I have learned more from each baby and I like trying new products that can possibly make life easier with a newborn. I wrote a post about baby must have's after Jett was born. That is found here. So on top of those products, which I currently still love and use, here is my new list of things I have found after my 5th baby, that I can't live without.
First up is the Olli Swaddle. I love to swaddle my babies and this swaddler is simply the best. I live in Arizona and it's starting to get really hot, the blankets I was using to swaddle were making her so sweaty. This is made a a fabric that keeps baby cool and has Velcro to keep in snuggly in place. Its a stretchy fabric so it doesn't squeeze baby, just gently hugs them. I adore it.
First up is the Olli Swaddle. I love to swaddle my babies and this swaddler is simply the best. I live in Arizona and it's starting to get really hot, the blankets I was using to swaddle were making her so sweaty. This is made a a fabric that keeps baby cool and has Velcro to keep in snuggly in place. Its a stretchy fabric so it doesn't squeeze baby, just gently hugs them. I adore it.
Next is the Solly Baby Wrap. I still love my Ergo carrier, this is just a different tool that does essentially the same thing. Its very comfy to wear and baby falls asleep the instant you put them in. My only complaint is getting it to be the right amount of tight, it's either too tight and you can't get baby in, or it's too loose and it sags. I'm still perfecting it, but still love it.
Next is the Angel Care system. After a big scare with RSV with our little one when she was just 3 weeks old and stopped breathing several times, I knew I needed something to give us peace of mind. This monitor measures movement and is so sensitive, it can feel baby breathing and alerts you if no movement is detected for 20 seconds. It works phenomenally well and I love knowing she is breathing. Great product.
Next is the Mamaroo by 4moms. This may be my favorite new find. It is amazing. It sways and bounces and rocks baby side to side in a smooth fluid motion. It has 5 different movements and 6 different sounds and can hook up to your ipod. It's genius. Mom's don't vibrate, or swing, they sway, bounce and rock, and this mimics those movements perfectly. Its simply genius.
And another favorite by 4moms is the bath they make. It's got a thermometer on it and the water passes through that, then into an area for clean water, then into the bath and out of the side. So the water is continuously flowing through, clean water in, dirty water out. And you scoop water to pour on baby from the clean water area. Very cool.
Next up is the Medela Freestyle pump. I had a Medela Pump in Style before and just switched to this one and I Love Love Love it! Its so small and portable. You charge the battery and can take it anywhere. You can also hook it up so it's hands free. And I love they way you can program it to remember your settings and how long you want it on certain suction strengths. It also has a let down setting that it so great. Favorite pump by far.
AND while we're on the subject of breasts, this is a great new invention that makes so much sense, you wonder why you never knew about it. It's called the Milk Saver. You put it in your bra on the side that you aren't breastfeeding on and when you get the let down, this catches all the milk, instead of it getting wasted in a pad. It's made of soft silicone so when you're done you just pour it into a bottle, or storage bag, or whatever you need to do with it. And it surprisingly collected A LOT of milk!!!! I get at least an ounce at each feeding. (when I remember to put it in, which isn't every time) But if you are looking for a way to store extra milk, this is very effective and really easy to use.
And on that awkward note..... that concludes my latest finds. I hope that helps some new mom out there! I wish I knew about these 10 years ago when I had my first baby!!!!!
Tuesday, February 17, 2015
Georgia's Nursery
Tuesday, January 13, 2015
Georgie's birth story
I don't know about you but I love reading people's birth stories. And I love having a record of the details, so I should probably write them down while I still remember them. And just so you know, I'm typing this with my little nugget lying right on my chest. Pure heaven.
I guess it all started on Friday the 2nd. I was worried about how little movement I was feeling so I decided to go in to the hospital to get the baby checked on. She was always a mellow baby, but I wasn't feeling any movement all day. So Michael stayed home with the kids and I drove out to Gilbert to the hospital. I was put in triage and hooked up to the monitors. The nurse checked and I was dilated to 5 cm, which sort of surprised me because at my drs apt a few days earlier I was only at 2 cm. So they brought in the ultra sound machine to check on the baby. It was a half hour ultra sound, they had to count babies movements and give her a "score", after about 15 minutes and awkward small talk with the ultra sound tech he says "this baby hasn't moved once since I started. Heart beat and fluid levels look good, but it is not moving" When it was done he said he had to score her very low because she wasn't moving and that he was recommending induction that night. I freaked out. So I stayed in triage for another few hours being monitored and then they checked me again and finally said they were going to send me home because the baby was fine, just not moving......okay. Crisis averted. I left the hospital totally exhausted and slightly frustrated for the emotional roller coaster they just sent me on. I met Michael and the kids at my sister in laws house for dinner and was feeling really crampy and yucky. We went home and at about 10 pm I had a contraction, a big one that hurt really bad. I told Michael and he really didn't care because I had contractions all the time. Then I had another one, and another one, and another one. I started timing them and they were 2 minutes apart. Then they were a minute and a half apart. after an hour I said "okay lets go, I am seriously in labor" We grabbed our bags and ran out the door. My contractions were so close together with so much pressure, I swore the baby was going to be born in the car. Michael was driving so fast! I looked over at one point and he was going 85 on surface streets. We really didn't want this baby born in the car. I was pretty much like every movie scene where a couple is frantically driving to the hospital. With every contraction I was yelling "oh my gosh hurry up!!!!" We get there and run out and they take us right back to triage. I was once again hooked up to the monitors and checked, still 5 cm. I was hurting so bad. I have never had to feel contractions like that, I've always had an epidural by this point and haven't really felt them. I asked if I could get up and walk around and they said no because at 36 weeks I wasn't considered "term" yet so they didn't want to encourage labor. But they also wouldn't stop it if it was happening on it's own. So I got to lay in this super small, super uncomfy bed and have contractions every minute and a half. I was checked after about an hour and was still 5cm so they gave me morphine (fabulous drug, we should get some for the house) and monitored me for another hour. Checked me again, still 5 cm. This time they gave me a drug called Staydol, it's pretty much terrible. It makes you feel super weird, like you can't control your muscles. It's suppose to relax your body, but it just made me feel anxious. After another hour......still 5 cm. COME ON!!!!!!! WHAT THE HECK!!!!! I was in tears at this point from being in so much pain and being so frustrated and exhausted. After another hour the nurse came back in and said they had to send me home because I wasn't progressing. I could have punched that nurse right in the throat. But there was really nothing we could do. So we drive home at 5:30 in the morning. We slept for a few hours, the medicine they gave me really slowed down my contractions making it possible to sleep a little bit.
It's now Saturday the 3rd, Michael's parents just so happen to be in town so they took the kids on a hike, which was a total life saver. We were so exhausted. I was able to get up and get a little bit of organizing done, I knew this baby was coming very soon. At about 3 I went into the bathroom and to my surprise MY WATER BROKE!!!!!! Holy exciting!!! I ran upstairs with liquid running all over the place and yelled at Michael to get up screaming "My water broke! My water broke! Get up we gotta go now!" Our youngest Jett was still at home sleeping so I jumped on the phone to find somewhere for him to go. I seriously called 6 people, NO ONE WOULD ANSWER THE PHONE!!!! COME ON!!! I finally got ahold of one of my young women that lives up the street and she happily took Jett for us. Strangely, my contractions had slowed down so much that I was only feeling them about every 15-20 minutes. So it wasn't a huge rush like it was the night before. We got to the hospital, I was holding a big towel between my legs like a diaper and waddled in. Once again we were sent to triage and got all checked in again. But this time, we knew we were there to stay. I got that awful IV put in and was put into a delivery room. I was actually really comfortable, no contractions, so we were just hanging out, watching TV, which was awesome because we don't have cable so it's super exciting to watch real TV. :) That night just so happen to be girls night and a bunch of friends went out to dinner, when they heard I was in labor they asked to come visit, I of course said "come on over!" So they did, and was so fun to see them all!
I guess it all started on Friday the 2nd. I was worried about how little movement I was feeling so I decided to go in to the hospital to get the baby checked on. She was always a mellow baby, but I wasn't feeling any movement all day. So Michael stayed home with the kids and I drove out to Gilbert to the hospital. I was put in triage and hooked up to the monitors. The nurse checked and I was dilated to 5 cm, which sort of surprised me because at my drs apt a few days earlier I was only at 2 cm. So they brought in the ultra sound machine to check on the baby. It was a half hour ultra sound, they had to count babies movements and give her a "score", after about 15 minutes and awkward small talk with the ultra sound tech he says "this baby hasn't moved once since I started. Heart beat and fluid levels look good, but it is not moving" When it was done he said he had to score her very low because she wasn't moving and that he was recommending induction that night. I freaked out. So I stayed in triage for another few hours being monitored and then they checked me again and finally said they were going to send me home because the baby was fine, just not moving......okay. Crisis averted. I left the hospital totally exhausted and slightly frustrated for the emotional roller coaster they just sent me on. I met Michael and the kids at my sister in laws house for dinner and was feeling really crampy and yucky. We went home and at about 10 pm I had a contraction, a big one that hurt really bad. I told Michael and he really didn't care because I had contractions all the time. Then I had another one, and another one, and another one. I started timing them and they were 2 minutes apart. Then they were a minute and a half apart. after an hour I said "okay lets go, I am seriously in labor" We grabbed our bags and ran out the door. My contractions were so close together with so much pressure, I swore the baby was going to be born in the car. Michael was driving so fast! I looked over at one point and he was going 85 on surface streets. We really didn't want this baby born in the car. I was pretty much like every movie scene where a couple is frantically driving to the hospital. With every contraction I was yelling "oh my gosh hurry up!!!!" We get there and run out and they take us right back to triage. I was once again hooked up to the monitors and checked, still 5 cm. I was hurting so bad. I have never had to feel contractions like that, I've always had an epidural by this point and haven't really felt them. I asked if I could get up and walk around and they said no because at 36 weeks I wasn't considered "term" yet so they didn't want to encourage labor. But they also wouldn't stop it if it was happening on it's own. So I got to lay in this super small, super uncomfy bed and have contractions every minute and a half. I was checked after about an hour and was still 5cm so they gave me morphine (fabulous drug, we should get some for the house) and monitored me for another hour. Checked me again, still 5 cm. This time they gave me a drug called Staydol, it's pretty much terrible. It makes you feel super weird, like you can't control your muscles. It's suppose to relax your body, but it just made me feel anxious. After another hour......still 5 cm. COME ON!!!!!!! WHAT THE HECK!!!!! I was in tears at this point from being in so much pain and being so frustrated and exhausted. After another hour the nurse came back in and said they had to send me home because I wasn't progressing. I could have punched that nurse right in the throat. But there was really nothing we could do. So we drive home at 5:30 in the morning. We slept for a few hours, the medicine they gave me really slowed down my contractions making it possible to sleep a little bit.
It's now Saturday the 3rd, Michael's parents just so happen to be in town so they took the kids on a hike, which was a total life saver. We were so exhausted. I was able to get up and get a little bit of organizing done, I knew this baby was coming very soon. At about 3 I went into the bathroom and to my surprise MY WATER BROKE!!!!!! Holy exciting!!! I ran upstairs with liquid running all over the place and yelled at Michael to get up screaming "My water broke! My water broke! Get up we gotta go now!" Our youngest Jett was still at home sleeping so I jumped on the phone to find somewhere for him to go. I seriously called 6 people, NO ONE WOULD ANSWER THE PHONE!!!! COME ON!!! I finally got ahold of one of my young women that lives up the street and she happily took Jett for us. Strangely, my contractions had slowed down so much that I was only feeling them about every 15-20 minutes. So it wasn't a huge rush like it was the night before. We got to the hospital, I was holding a big towel between my legs like a diaper and waddled in. Once again we were sent to triage and got all checked in again. But this time, we knew we were there to stay. I got that awful IV put in and was put into a delivery room. I was actually really comfortable, no contractions, so we were just hanging out, watching TV, which was awesome because we don't have cable so it's super exciting to watch real TV. :) That night just so happen to be girls night and a bunch of friends went out to dinner, when they heard I was in labor they asked to come visit, I of course said "come on over!" So they did, and was so fun to see them all!
I ended up testing positive for group B strep, which I really have no idea what that means, but I know it's dangerous for baby so I had to be treated with antibiotics for 4 hours before the baby was born. So It was good that my contractions slowed down so much. After the antibiotic dose they were going to start pitocin to get things going. So I was able to get an epidural before all that was started. I'm not tough, I'm not going to pretend to be. I'm totally pro epidural. I was so done being in pain after 8 hours of contractions the night before. So that was done, then the pitocin was started around 9:30 pm. It took about two hours for the contractions to start up and get a good strong pattern. I was checked at 11:50 and was still 5 cm!!! At this point I asked the nurse "So what if I just stopped dilating, like I will never go past a 5, because after everything I've been through and it's still not moving, I don't know what will work!!!" She reassured me that everything will be fine and to just be patient.........About 15 minutes later I had to push. I had to push right now. I called the nurse in and said "check me now because I need to push" She didn't believe me because I was only at a 5 fifteen minutes earlier. Michael said when she pulled the sheet up to check me, he could see the babies head!!! Holy fast! She said "don't push! I'm getting the doctor!" and she ran out the door. I looked at Michael and said "I have to push so get down there"
It took about 30 seconds for the neonatal team and the doctor to get in there and set up for baby. And then, welp, I pushed that baby out!! It took about 30 seconds for her to come out. Now, remember we didn't know the gender of this baby, so we were beyond excited to find out what it was. As soon as she came out the doctor lifted up her bum and we all said "It's a girl!!!!!" It was one of the coolest moments of my life. For reals. Totally amazing. The first thing I noticed was how tiny she was. Teeny tiny feet and legs. I had requested that as soon as the baby was born, if she was healthy enough, that they put her right on my chest and let me hold her there. All of my other babies have been taken away from me and cleaned up and whatever else they do with babies, before they let me hold them. This time I said no!! Give her to me, she's mine! And that's what they did. Until the NICU nurse had to take her and give her some oxygen because she was slightly purple. The I got her right back and she laid on my chest. It was so amazing. After about 20 minutes she started sucking her hand so I moved her over and she nursed all on her own!! It was the coolest thing ever.
After that, we just stayed in the delivery room for a few hours so the neonatal nurse could keep an eye on Georgie. She was afterall, still a preemie. They finally weighed her and she was 5 pounds 13 ounces and 18 inches long. My smallest baby yet, smaller than my 34 weeker! As soon as my legs regained their feeling, I was moved to the recovery room and they let me keep her in the room with me. Michael stayed with us and we slept for a few hours. We didn't get to sleep until about 5 in the morning. The next two days were filled with visitors, narcotics, post labor contractions, nurses checking on my lady bits, gross hospital food, and so many snuggles and cuddles from this new peanut. I didn't let her out of my room unless they insisted on certain tests or somethings that had to be done outside my room. She amazingly didn't have any health problems. No breathing or eating problems, nothing. After having Jett in the NICU for two weeks we were really hoping she wouldn't have to go through that. But this little champ surprised everyone and is perfectly healthy.
And now we're home, my mom is here holding down the fort. (literally, She has taken over my life and let me sleep, snuggle and nurse this baby to my hearts content. I couldn't have done this without her) Georgie is so tiny, nothing fits her. Socks fall right off her feet. Newborn clothes drown her. She fits in preemie things but we didn't want to buy too many of those because I'm sure she won't fit in them for long. But for now we are all gushing over her tinyness and cuteness and every little sound she makes. The other kids are obsessed with her, always wanting to hold her and help. Jett is probably my biggest challenge, he's two and used to being the baby, and now all the sudden mommy is holding a different creature that takes up all her time. He tells me "mommy put it down" referring to the baby.
She had a pediatrician appointment the other day and weighed 5 pounds 8 ounces. Sooo little! My goodness! We also gave her a Japanese middle name, as we do with all our kids. We chose Jun, which means gentle and pure. We found it fitting since she has a very mellow energy about her, even in my tummy she was calm and gentle. So her full name is Georgia Claire Jun Tao.
I am just in pure newborn heaven. Even though since she's a preemie and so small she has to eat every two hours, even at night, which means I am not sleeping at all, I am on a high of excitement. But let me just say, nursing doesn't get any less painful with your 5th baby. Not sleeping doesn't get any easier, baby weight doesn't come off faster, hormones don't go easy on you, and your patience doesn't increase. But I'm one lucky momma. I've successfully brought 5 babies into this world and am currently holding a 5 pound beauty of a baby in my arms. It's all so worth it and so miraculous.
Here are some pictures of the big day and days that followed Georgie's birth.
Monday, December 8, 2014
???????
Life has pretty much the same for the last few months. Just getting fatter and fatter. I'm pretty open about my weight, and let me just say, I'm definitely the fattest I have ever been in my whole life, right at this very moment. And I still have a good 6 weeks left before this baby comes. It doesn't help that all I want to eat is carbs and sugar. And it really doesn't help that I can't really exercise because my tail bone and hips literally feel like they're going to fall apart, so much hurt. Watching me walk is quite entertaining. I'm serious about wanting a wheel chair, which will just aid in my ever growing double chins. I already have a history of huge babies (Rylie was 9 pounds, Davis 8.6 at two weeks early, Liv 6.14 at 3 weeks early, and Jett 5.14 at 6 weeks early) All very big, considering when they were born. So please, keep the donuts away from me. Or don't, I'll just eat them all cuz I do what I want.
This pregnancy is turning out to be so full of mysteries, I don't know how much more uncertainty I can handle. First and foremost, We don't know the gender of the baby, which would have been plenty of mystery for one pregnancy. But the baby is breech and we don't know what will happen. Doc says it has till 37 weeks to turn (I am currently 33 weeks) If it does not turn, I go into the hospital, get an epidural and they try to turn the baby externally. Which is less than ideal, lots of things can go wrong. (break your water, pull the placenta away, wrap the cord around babies neck etc.) They do this procedure in the C section room in case they have to cut that baby out in an emergency. If they can't turn the baby, they schedule a C section. So there's that.
(little side note: having a breech baby feels so weird. I'm so used to having my babies kick and bruise my ribs, now he/she kicks straight down, directly on my bladder. I don't know what's worse.)
Then, we are very worried about me going into labor and the baby being born very fast. Each baby of mine has come significantly faster than the last. Jett was born in about 20 minutes. That's from first contraction to baby crying. So I've had a baby with no epidural and I never ever want to do that again. I mean like, never. If I go into labor and the baby is breech, and it wants to come out before we can get to the hospital (which is a good half hour away) that's super dangerous. I was also group B strep positive with Jett. If thats the case with this one, it can't be born anywhere but a hospital, breech or not.
Soooo.....breech baby....fast labor......group B strep.....boy or girl......c section......????? So many mysteries! I can't even handle it. But you know what? None of it is in my control. So I will just take each day as it comes. If I have to have a C section it will be really hard but not the end of the world. As long as the baby comes out okay and everyone is alive and happy, it will be okay. I've read some bizarre things people do to try and flip breech babies, I'm not about to walk down the stairs on my hands and knees, head first. Or put bags of frozen peas on my tummy to get the baby to turn away from the cold. Or my favorite, have my husband talk loudly at my crotch to get the baby to turn towards daddy's voice. Ahhh, no. So weird.
The rest of this month is jammed packed with Christmas parties and events to keep us beyond busy. I'm counting on that to distract me from all this anxiety. After Christmas is over I'm going to need major support as things will die down, and I'll be left with my mysteries to wait and wait and wait to meet this little bundle!!
I'll end by saying I am just as excited about meeting and cuddling my 5th baby as I was my first......and second, and third, and fourth. It doesn't get old. I just feel more.....experienced. I guess I feel like I know what to freak out about and when to just go with the flow. I'm no pro, but I like to think I know a thing or two about what I'm getting into and the craziness that is about to enclose on my family. I'm so blessed and love this baby to pieces already!!!
This pregnancy is turning out to be so full of mysteries, I don't know how much more uncertainty I can handle. First and foremost, We don't know the gender of the baby, which would have been plenty of mystery for one pregnancy. But the baby is breech and we don't know what will happen. Doc says it has till 37 weeks to turn (I am currently 33 weeks) If it does not turn, I go into the hospital, get an epidural and they try to turn the baby externally. Which is less than ideal, lots of things can go wrong. (break your water, pull the placenta away, wrap the cord around babies neck etc.) They do this procedure in the C section room in case they have to cut that baby out in an emergency. If they can't turn the baby, they schedule a C section. So there's that.
(little side note: having a breech baby feels so weird. I'm so used to having my babies kick and bruise my ribs, now he/she kicks straight down, directly on my bladder. I don't know what's worse.)
Then, we are very worried about me going into labor and the baby being born very fast. Each baby of mine has come significantly faster than the last. Jett was born in about 20 minutes. That's from first contraction to baby crying. So I've had a baby with no epidural and I never ever want to do that again. I mean like, never. If I go into labor and the baby is breech, and it wants to come out before we can get to the hospital (which is a good half hour away) that's super dangerous. I was also group B strep positive with Jett. If thats the case with this one, it can't be born anywhere but a hospital, breech or not.
Soooo.....breech baby....fast labor......group B strep.....boy or girl......c section......????? So many mysteries! I can't even handle it. But you know what? None of it is in my control. So I will just take each day as it comes. If I have to have a C section it will be really hard but not the end of the world. As long as the baby comes out okay and everyone is alive and happy, it will be okay. I've read some bizarre things people do to try and flip breech babies, I'm not about to walk down the stairs on my hands and knees, head first. Or put bags of frozen peas on my tummy to get the baby to turn away from the cold. Or my favorite, have my husband talk loudly at my crotch to get the baby to turn towards daddy's voice. Ahhh, no. So weird.
The rest of this month is jammed packed with Christmas parties and events to keep us beyond busy. I'm counting on that to distract me from all this anxiety. After Christmas is over I'm going to need major support as things will die down, and I'll be left with my mysteries to wait and wait and wait to meet this little bundle!!
I'll end by saying I am just as excited about meeting and cuddling my 5th baby as I was my first......and second, and third, and fourth. It doesn't get old. I just feel more.....experienced. I guess I feel like I know what to freak out about and when to just go with the flow. I'm no pro, but I like to think I know a thing or two about what I'm getting into and the craziness that is about to enclose on my family. I'm so blessed and love this baby to pieces already!!!
Monday, September 15, 2014
life after nausea
So I know my last post was a little bit of a downer. Life when you're pregnant sick is pretty miserable, I just had to write about it! But I'm happy to report that I am 22 weeks and feeling amazing. No more being sick all day every day. I knew this day would come, but waiting for it is the worst. Life completely stops for me when I'm sick like that. I know as soon as I can scroll through Pinterest with out speeding past the food posts that I'm on my way back to normal. I'm so grateful to be feeling better. So I'm back to cooking and cleaning and watching my belly grow every day. All I can wear is maternity stuff now, which is really fun to see what I can come with to wear. I can feel the little person in there moving around all the time. Although I have to say that this baby is actually my most mellow baby so far. We went in for our 20 week ultra sound and he/she was hardly moving at all. We didn't find out what we're having, which made for a really strange ultra sound. Usually I am counting down the days till I fond out what I'm having. This time it's just different. I just flat out don't care what it is. Boy, girl, either would be fabulous. And I already have two of each so I thought it would be a fun game to not find out. My husband on the other hand, does not think it's fun. He is rather irritated with the whole thing. He hates surprises. But I'm the boss and I'm pretty much forcing him to do what I say. He doesn't like it one bit. But too bad.
We've had some exciting things happen in the last few weeks. Our Mastiff had puppies again! There were 7, which was very unexpected, her last litter was only 4 and they all died. But this time, her milk wasn't flowing like it usually does, so we had to bottle feed the puppies. All 7 of them. It was exhausting. And this litter happen to be born with some sort of genetic abnormality where when they drink they aspirate the milk and it goes into their lungs and kills them. We lost 3 puppies this way. So sad. Then we lost 3 more from other random things and only ended up with two sellable puppies. So frustrating for the amount of time and money we put into keeping them alive. But alas, this is the game you play when you breed dogs. You win some, you loose some. (a lot).
We also had a really fun encounter with lice. Yep. Never had to deal with lice and I dreaded the day when I had to. It's sort of a right of passage. You ain't no real mom until you pick devil bugs and eggs out of your children's hair for hours. One morning last week Olivia came to me and said her head was itching, I checked and saw little white dots everywhere. I had never seen lice before so I took her into the pediatrician and had her looked at. It was quickly confirmed that it was indeed lice. (insert a mental image of me gagging here) I freaked out. I drove straight to my older kids school and told the front desk what happened and they called both kids up to get looked at. And yep, they both had it as well. I pretty much made Michael come home from work immediately to help me. I ran to the store for lice kits and Michael started on laundry. Oh the freakin laundry. We had piles and piles of it. Every sheet, blanket, cushion cover, piece of clothing, pillow case, anything washable, we washed. And then I sprayed the whole house with alcohol and tea tree oil. Then came the hair picking. Oh gag. This was the worst part. Michael did the first round and got all the live bugs out. Then on the second round I got to dig through and see what I could find. Those eggs are no easy task to get out. They are stuck to the hair with some sort of magical satan cement. They do not come out. You literally have to pinch it with your finger and fingernail and slide it down the hair shaft until its out. And there are hundreds of them!!! Holy gag. It was awful. Just awful. I was itchy for days just thinking about those little demon bugs. So after a few days and 4 lice treatments each, I think they're gone. I hope they're gone. I hope I never have to deal with that ever again. I probably will.
So, feeling better, puppies, and lice are what my life has been about for a few weeks. So looking forward to fall. Its still about 100 degrees here, which actually doesn't feel that bad. But by next month it should be down in the 80s, and thats fall for us. It's actually awesome. While everyone else starts to freeze, we get the start of 8 months of glorious 75 degree weather every day. That right there is the reason I moved here. :)
We've had some exciting things happen in the last few weeks. Our Mastiff had puppies again! There were 7, which was very unexpected, her last litter was only 4 and they all died. But this time, her milk wasn't flowing like it usually does, so we had to bottle feed the puppies. All 7 of them. It was exhausting. And this litter happen to be born with some sort of genetic abnormality where when they drink they aspirate the milk and it goes into their lungs and kills them. We lost 3 puppies this way. So sad. Then we lost 3 more from other random things and only ended up with two sellable puppies. So frustrating for the amount of time and money we put into keeping them alive. But alas, this is the game you play when you breed dogs. You win some, you loose some. (a lot).
We also had a really fun encounter with lice. Yep. Never had to deal with lice and I dreaded the day when I had to. It's sort of a right of passage. You ain't no real mom until you pick devil bugs and eggs out of your children's hair for hours. One morning last week Olivia came to me and said her head was itching, I checked and saw little white dots everywhere. I had never seen lice before so I took her into the pediatrician and had her looked at. It was quickly confirmed that it was indeed lice. (insert a mental image of me gagging here) I freaked out. I drove straight to my older kids school and told the front desk what happened and they called both kids up to get looked at. And yep, they both had it as well. I pretty much made Michael come home from work immediately to help me. I ran to the store for lice kits and Michael started on laundry. Oh the freakin laundry. We had piles and piles of it. Every sheet, blanket, cushion cover, piece of clothing, pillow case, anything washable, we washed. And then I sprayed the whole house with alcohol and tea tree oil. Then came the hair picking. Oh gag. This was the worst part. Michael did the first round and got all the live bugs out. Then on the second round I got to dig through and see what I could find. Those eggs are no easy task to get out. They are stuck to the hair with some sort of magical satan cement. They do not come out. You literally have to pinch it with your finger and fingernail and slide it down the hair shaft until its out. And there are hundreds of them!!! Holy gag. It was awful. Just awful. I was itchy for days just thinking about those little demon bugs. So after a few days and 4 lice treatments each, I think they're gone. I hope they're gone. I hope I never have to deal with that ever again. I probably will.
So, feeling better, puppies, and lice are what my life has been about for a few weeks. So looking forward to fall. Its still about 100 degrees here, which actually doesn't feel that bad. But by next month it should be down in the 80s, and thats fall for us. It's actually awesome. While everyone else starts to freeze, we get the start of 8 months of glorious 75 degree weather every day. That right there is the reason I moved here. :)
Tuesday, August 5, 2014
a little sarcasm, a little truth
Maybe in a few years when I have forgotten about all this and considering another baby, I'll be glad I wrote this down. I just feel the need to document my life right now. Its not all that uplifting but i'll try and be as entertaining as possible.
I am about 16 weeks pregnant. Thats 4 months. I have been sick every single day for the last 4 months. Now, this sickness is not anything that can be described. Its a whole body sickness, muscle aches, head aches, upset stomach, heartburn, stuffy nose, sore back, insomnia, it's just lovely. I don't know how our brains literally forget how bad this is when we're thinking of having another baby. But every time I go through this I think "What was I thinking?" This is the SIXTH time I have gone through this. SIXTH. My brain must really have this forgetting super power.
I don't clean my house because I literally don't have the energy to do it. I look at the dirty dishes that need to be done and think to myself "Meh, I don't want to do that at all" Then I don't. I have piles of clean laundry all over the house because I hate putting it away. (this is a non pregnant problem I have too) The carpet cleaner is currently sitting in my hall full of dirty water from cleaning the stairs, I walk past it literally 10 times a day and don't do a thing about it. It needs to be emptied and put away, but I just think I'll do it later. Its been there for 4 days.
Getting out of bed in the morning is comical. My alarm goes off at 7:30 to get the kids to school by 8. Trying to pry my eyes open and keep them open is a trial. Then actually sitting up takes about 10 minutes. Between a sore back and having to pee every hour at night, I don't get much sleep. I require a lot of sleep. Thats just the way it is. Sleep is my kryponite and thats a well know fact in my family. So I roll out of bed, go down stairs and make sure hair is brushed, lunches are packed and everyone is ready. I walk out the door in my pajamas with no shoes on and my hair looking like a rock star and drive the kids to school. It's extra awesome when they are a few minutes late and I have to walk into the front office to sign them in looking the way I do. (which is what happened today due to a dead car battery.) On days that I don't have errands to run I come back home and eat some breakfast, make sure the little kids have breakfast and plop back down on the couch while the two littles play until I have the will to get up.
Dinner time is extra fun because I start feeling worse around 4 every day. So cooking anything makes me want to vomit. (which I actually never do, not a puker) Half the time my kids have a free for all in the kitchen which consists of them scrambling some eggs and making some rice. Some nights they're lucky and get cereal. Don't get me wrong, I do cook for them on occasion, pancakes totally count as cooking.
Getting dressed in actual clothes is a myth. Like a unicorn. I do it for church or if I have some kind of appointment to go to. My belly is getting bigger every day and clothes are getting tighter and tighter. Maxi dresses and skirts are wonderful if I must wear something presentable. Not to mention it is one thousand degrees here. (Arizona) Half the reason I don't move much during the day is I'm just not willing to make my body any warmer by exerting energy. Being sick is hard, being sick and hot is just not acceptable. So my AC bill is amazing. I just love it.
The only things that sound good to me these days is usually fast food items. Hamburgers, french fries, tacos...bring it all to me. Sugar does not sound good to me, thankfully. I usually have a major sweet tooth. Now soda and candy sound like poison. Grocery shopping is another fun outing. Everything I look at grosses me out. I end up buying bagels, popcorn, and cereal. Not a well balanced food supply. If I could hire someone to grocery shop for me, I would.
People ask me how I'm feeling and I smile and say "I'm okay" sometimes holding back tears because we are suppose to, as mothers, bear this burden without complaint. It is part of bringing life into this world. It is the sacrifice we make to be able to have these sweet spirits. If we complain, we appear ungrateful. But I say this is hard work and its okay to have a bad day. It doesn't mean I am any less up for the challenge. I know I can do it, sometimes it just requires some tears, a lot of sleep and a huge bowl of ice cream. We get extra points in heaven for going through morning sickness. (all day sickness)
For reals though, I am miserable. But I'm allowed to complain and whine and be completely sarcastic only because I know how ridiculously, outrageously, blessed I am. This little parasite in me is a miracle and a reminder to me every day of the importance of families. I do have some amazing things going for me as well, my mother is paying for one of my young women to come for an hour every day after school and do whatever I need her to do. Its a life saver. I have her fold laundry, clean the play room, play games with the kids, anything that needs to be done. Its fabulous. The sister missionaries in my ward also offer to come help me clean once a week. They deep clean my kitchen and thats a miracle right there. I have also been blessed to have people bringing us dinner every once and a while, which I feel really guilty about, but I'm not going to turn it down. Its very welcomed and I'm sure my kids like eating real food. And then theres my husband who works all day and then comes home and helps me out and rubs my neck when I get migraines, which is a lot. I'll read a story to my kids when all I want to do is go to bed. Give as many hugs as I can and remind them that I do love them even when I'm laying down all day. Because they are the reminders to me that what I'm doing every day is totally worth it.
I am about 16 weeks pregnant. Thats 4 months. I have been sick every single day for the last 4 months. Now, this sickness is not anything that can be described. Its a whole body sickness, muscle aches, head aches, upset stomach, heartburn, stuffy nose, sore back, insomnia, it's just lovely. I don't know how our brains literally forget how bad this is when we're thinking of having another baby. But every time I go through this I think "What was I thinking?" This is the SIXTH time I have gone through this. SIXTH. My brain must really have this forgetting super power.
I don't clean my house because I literally don't have the energy to do it. I look at the dirty dishes that need to be done and think to myself "Meh, I don't want to do that at all" Then I don't. I have piles of clean laundry all over the house because I hate putting it away. (this is a non pregnant problem I have too) The carpet cleaner is currently sitting in my hall full of dirty water from cleaning the stairs, I walk past it literally 10 times a day and don't do a thing about it. It needs to be emptied and put away, but I just think I'll do it later. Its been there for 4 days.
Getting out of bed in the morning is comical. My alarm goes off at 7:30 to get the kids to school by 8. Trying to pry my eyes open and keep them open is a trial. Then actually sitting up takes about 10 minutes. Between a sore back and having to pee every hour at night, I don't get much sleep. I require a lot of sleep. Thats just the way it is. Sleep is my kryponite and thats a well know fact in my family. So I roll out of bed, go down stairs and make sure hair is brushed, lunches are packed and everyone is ready. I walk out the door in my pajamas with no shoes on and my hair looking like a rock star and drive the kids to school. It's extra awesome when they are a few minutes late and I have to walk into the front office to sign them in looking the way I do. (which is what happened today due to a dead car battery.) On days that I don't have errands to run I come back home and eat some breakfast, make sure the little kids have breakfast and plop back down on the couch while the two littles play until I have the will to get up.
Dinner time is extra fun because I start feeling worse around 4 every day. So cooking anything makes me want to vomit. (which I actually never do, not a puker) Half the time my kids have a free for all in the kitchen which consists of them scrambling some eggs and making some rice. Some nights they're lucky and get cereal. Don't get me wrong, I do cook for them on occasion, pancakes totally count as cooking.
Getting dressed in actual clothes is a myth. Like a unicorn. I do it for church or if I have some kind of appointment to go to. My belly is getting bigger every day and clothes are getting tighter and tighter. Maxi dresses and skirts are wonderful if I must wear something presentable. Not to mention it is one thousand degrees here. (Arizona) Half the reason I don't move much during the day is I'm just not willing to make my body any warmer by exerting energy. Being sick is hard, being sick and hot is just not acceptable. So my AC bill is amazing. I just love it.
The only things that sound good to me these days is usually fast food items. Hamburgers, french fries, tacos...bring it all to me. Sugar does not sound good to me, thankfully. I usually have a major sweet tooth. Now soda and candy sound like poison. Grocery shopping is another fun outing. Everything I look at grosses me out. I end up buying bagels, popcorn, and cereal. Not a well balanced food supply. If I could hire someone to grocery shop for me, I would.
People ask me how I'm feeling and I smile and say "I'm okay" sometimes holding back tears because we are suppose to, as mothers, bear this burden without complaint. It is part of bringing life into this world. It is the sacrifice we make to be able to have these sweet spirits. If we complain, we appear ungrateful. But I say this is hard work and its okay to have a bad day. It doesn't mean I am any less up for the challenge. I know I can do it, sometimes it just requires some tears, a lot of sleep and a huge bowl of ice cream. We get extra points in heaven for going through morning sickness. (all day sickness)
For reals though, I am miserable. But I'm allowed to complain and whine and be completely sarcastic only because I know how ridiculously, outrageously, blessed I am. This little parasite in me is a miracle and a reminder to me every day of the importance of families. I do have some amazing things going for me as well, my mother is paying for one of my young women to come for an hour every day after school and do whatever I need her to do. Its a life saver. I have her fold laundry, clean the play room, play games with the kids, anything that needs to be done. Its fabulous. The sister missionaries in my ward also offer to come help me clean once a week. They deep clean my kitchen and thats a miracle right there. I have also been blessed to have people bringing us dinner every once and a while, which I feel really guilty about, but I'm not going to turn it down. Its very welcomed and I'm sure my kids like eating real food. And then theres my husband who works all day and then comes home and helps me out and rubs my neck when I get migraines, which is a lot. I'll read a story to my kids when all I want to do is go to bed. Give as many hugs as I can and remind them that I do love them even when I'm laying down all day. Because they are the reminders to me that what I'm doing every day is totally worth it.
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