Lighthouse

Last weekend, Abbie went to a water park with her cousin, so I had the opportunity to spend some special time with Raleigh. We went to a town near New Smyrna Beach and met up with my brother who lives near there. Our first stop was at Ponce Inlet Lighthouse, which is the second tallest in the U.S. 202 steps up and 202 back down. Raleigh was a trooper and didn't complain once! I on the other hand, was getting claustrophobic on the way up and had to stop for a break. The view at the top, however, was amazing and well worth the climb.

There were several buildings surrounding the lighthouse that were built in the 1800s with memorabilia and all sorts of historical artifacts. I love history, so it was right up my alley!

We next stopped at a marine science center where they rescue injured sea turtles and birds. And what's a trip to New Smyrna Beach without going to the beach? I couldn't believe how much nicer the beach was there than the one where I live. What a difference an hour makes! It was absolutely wonderful and the water was so shallow and clean looking. I didn't have to worry about a drop off like we have at our beach. Raleigh could run out into the water and the water level never rose above his knees. Beautiful...

6 Months

6 months. Wow. I can't believe how the time has gone by. It is such a significant time, yet I don't have much to say. Why is it that time seems to crawl ever so slowly when you are pregnant, but with an event such as the loss of a loved one when you want everything to be at a standstill, it goes lightening fast? I never quite got that.

Six months is such an adorable age when they really start to show their little personalities. I was thinking today about what he would have been like and what he would have been doing. Grabbing his little toes, crawling all over the place, giving me the biggest toothless grin...

We went to the cemetery this evening, and it was Josh's second time back since after the funeral. It had been atleast 2 months for me. I felt peace this time. Perhaps it was because we were all together, but it was the first time that I didn't shed a tear. I sat on the ground with Raleigh in my lap and we talked about his baby brother and how special he was and still is to our family. God has given me such a treasure in my family and I am such a lucky mommy!

Happy six months baby Matthew!
We love you!

Not Quite Filled, Certainly not Overflowing

Originally I was going to post on the great weekend we have had so far, but I will have to do that another day, because a different post is taking precendence over that one. Raleigh and I went to church this morning and I heard such an amazing message that really spoke to me today, and I felt really compelled to share it and how it relates to my life. It was called "The Overflowing Lifestyle."

It was about doing things to become filled with the Holy Spirit so much that the Holy Spirit in you is overflowing and you begin to share Him with others.

I can say that three months ago, that was completely me. I was reading my Bible daily, doing my devotions, talking to to God several times a day, and finally knew what it really meant to have a real relationship with Jesus Christ. I was sharing Him with others and it was so exciting to feel what I was feeling! Since going back to work in May, the Holy Spirit has been slowly "leaking" out of me. I was afraid it would happen...working for 10 hours a day, pick up kids, come home and cook dinner, baths, books, bed. Such a routine, and it's hard to break. Church on Wednesdays and Sundays, nothing in between. Just going through the motions.

I am not quite filled with the Holy Spirit, and I am definitely not overflowing to where I am sharing the Word with others. My Pastor shared with us a wonderful statement today: God has placed us here to touch lives. We touch them, God changes them. So true. Even if we are totally filled with the Spirit, what good is it really if we are not sharing that with others and changing their lives? Ok...yes, it's still good, but we need to be passing on the wonderful message! I have prayed that by sharing my story on the blog, that people might be touched. And they have. I have met so many wonderful blogging women on here and I am so grateful that we are able to share our stories and lift each other up in times of praise, hardship, sadness, and other emotions that we may go through. I am touched by reading about their lives and how their faith lives on through the most difficult of situations, so thank you all for sharing!

As for where I'm at spiritually at this moment, I can't stand it. I NEED that relationship that I had, BACK! No, I haven't turned into some horrible person, but I am missing out on the most important thing in my life! The one thing that got me to this wonderful place I am at now, that saved my marriage and gave me new life- God! I am a Christ Follower on a mission to get back what has been lost, and I know He will lead the way.

The LORD will guide you always;
he will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land
and will strengthen your frame.
You will be like a well-watered garden,
like a spring whose waters never fail.
Isaiah 58:11