BP alert

Hello peeps! I'm taking the time on the train ride to my gynae appointment and do a quick post.

I have past 37 weeks now, and my baby will not be a pre-term birth if I were to go into delivery now. However, baby K don't seem ready to come out anytime soon; though physically I feel greatly strained and having signs of backache and even contraction pains (mild) at times. 

I am to closely monitor my blood pressure, every 2-4 hourly as instructed by my gynae to catch any abnormally high reading or a spike in the BP. This would be a sign of me having to go into induced delivery due to pre-eclampsia. Other signs would be the post effect of the high BP like a sudden black out or I faint, or worse go into fits. 

My gynae do not believe that I will go into labour naturally, like labour symptoms will hit me on its own. He don't think I will experience the contraction pains by interval, or feel my waterbag break to go into labour. That to me is sad, as I thought what better way to go into labour than experiencing the unexpected myself! I didn't get it during Rianne's birth (which was induced), so it would be nice if I get that once-in-a-lifetime encounter (yup, no more pregnancy for me after this) at this pregnancy. 

Well, quoting my gynae; he doesn't want to 'miss the boat'. Inducing birth is much preferred and safer for me, lest my condition takes a drastic turn for the worse. Although I kept saying "I'm not ready!", a part of me actually wish to go into labour and get it done and over with soon. Experiencing heartburn every single day is no fun. Walking and balancing my movements like Humpty Dumpty is the least graceful too. And carrying an extra weight of 10kg and more is no joking matter! 

Ok, I'l wait to hear from my gynae soon and update again. Wish me luck, all. 

Kena confined..

Didn't expect at this stage of my pregnancy, I am being confined. No going out at all, and purely resting at home. I do wish I can rest a 100%, but it is highly unlikely with my room short of being ready for the new baby..

I have cleared up space for the baby cot, but have yet got the suitable storage unit for the baby's clothes and essentials. Also, I'm thinking to pack my things (mainly clothes) already for the impending move to our new house. 

The progress is slow, as I really, really have quite a number of stuff; either to throw or to keep. It's almost as good as the same amount of stuff discarded, I will be keeping an equal amount of stuff that is wanted. God, please bless me with the perserverance and strength to continue, and complete soon the packing. 

On the other side of the world, I went for my gynae checkup today and Dr Wee wasn't exactly pleased with my blood pressure records. 

He pointed out that there had been some extreme spikes, and also the irregular taking of the blood pressure which is concerning. As such, he had ordered another 'uric acid' marker test (marker for pre-eclampsia) to see if I have gone over my previous reading after 2 weeks, and strictly confined me to home/bed rest until he sees me in another 1 week's time. 

The blood taking (for the uric acid) was the worst today as I experienced the most painful jab after so many times of syringe poking during my 8+ months of pregnancy. I attached a picture so that you can understand the pain I was in while blood was drawn from me. 

Similarly, I had another jab which is just as painful when the needle goes into my butt cheek. This was my vaccine for the whopping cough. When all the jabs were finally done, I heaved a great sign of relief and hope I won't have to go under the needle somemore. 

Prepping up

I can still remember vividly of 7 years ago, at this time, I was already in hospital and induced to deliver Rianne due to pre-eclampsia. My organs (liver first and then kidney) were slowly being affected by the condition, and will eventually become life threatening should I allow Rianne to stay any longer in my stomach. 

This pregnancy I wasn't exactly spared of pre-eclampsia; but I am counting my blessings that I do not have to deliver my baby pre-maturely at 35 weeks! My gynae is hopeful for me to hold on for another week, til gestation of 36 weeks. But, I pray every night that my son will remain in his best condition (healthy and growing) until my EDD; or even until our National Day on 9 Aug 2016!

As the day draws closer, I am more and more excited and panicky of the childbirth. For a start, I am getting ready the list of things to go into my hospital bag. I find the items provided on this site really useful - http://www.parents.com/pregnancy/giving-birth/preparing-for-labor/hospital-packing-list/

I reckon the key item to prepare for my labour would be essentially the stuff that can keep my contraction pain at bay and tide me through the entire labour. I am not sure if the presence of KL will make a significant difference as compared to my mom's during my labour with Rianne. However, I am really having lots of expectation that he will be handy, comforting and most importantly, my pillar of strength and a 'human' pain relief. If he's gonnna be there physically, but engrossed in keeping himself occupied during the labour, then it is as good as me being there alone. 

I'm just gonna list the hit list of items I find especially beneficial for me (at least) :

- essential oils/massage oil/lotion (my mom used medicated oil the last time to rub my aching back, not the best aroma for a pregnant woman I have to say!). There have been a specific scent which calms and relaxes me, which is Peppermint or Eucalyptus. 

- speakers to play song list from Spotify (best source of relaxation if your husband hasn't got the best consolation skills!) 

- notes from antenatal class for husband to read and advise the right breathing techniques (you are as good as blind when in pain!)

- coloring book/storybook, in case need to wait a while to be fully dilated

- mobile phone or ipad, for a movie in case of the above same reason too. This reminds me to have more movies downloaded soon.

I guess the above should suffice on top of the essential items. 

My point of view is, my wellness (both physical and mental) is of utmost importance at the time of delivery. Afterall, I will be living under the restrictions of 'confinement' immediately after giving birth, so I better make use of the little luxury I am allowed. 

8 months and almost there..

OMG! How time flies.. I cannot believe that I'm already in that final trimester and I'm only 1-2 months away to bringing a new life into this world! But sorry to say that, this new little life has not got a name yet.. yes, you heard me right; not got a name yet. 

KL was so against the name 'Kashton', and me so not liking the name 'Rowan'. Not with the intention of offending anybody named 'Rowan', it's just me who finds the name a little less masculine than other boy names. For me, a boy should be 'macho', be it in his appearance or his behaviour. He should be the one who does not falter when faced with difficulties/hardship. He ought to fight like a soldier when in the army, behaves like a gentleman around the ladies and most importantly, possess the physical ability to do most simple labour-driven tasks like assembling or moving furniture, opening a tightly-closed jar, etc. I cannot bear to look at a man who struggles with bags of grocery where his wife handles them with much ease. 

There's no reason why a man cannot be physically stronger, even Biology says men tend to be stronger than women, physically. But, it is not uncommon for some men to be weaklings though. I think it is only understandable for some men to be like this if they have a medical condition. But, not forgivable when they choose to be weak because they are plain lazy. 

It's the baby naming that got me talking like a sexist, and to be honest, I am just pissed that we are getting nowhere with baby K's name. As much as I want to give the benefit of doubt to KL, I know that I am not wrong about him and that he has not putting in efforts to anything related to my pregnancy or to baby K. 

It is frustrating, no doubt. Many people has advised me to give up on my expectations in order to feel less disappointed. However, for me, if my husband is not expected to perform simple-expected duties of a man, husband and daddy, then what good is he to me?! I jolly well can do without him right?

I can assure you that I am not suffering from any pre-childbirth anxiety or depression. It is just disappointment speaking up now, and it will only be a matter of time that I refuse to be disappointed.. anymore.

Stress-less, not possible??

Thought the minute I am officially on Hospitalization Leave, my shoulders will drop and relax like never before.. but it was nothing like this. In fact, I was so stressed that I could feel my back and shoulders so tensed, that I want to hammer myself hard at those ache spots!!

Thinking of how I need to handover my work and complete some outstanding tasks assigned to me, kept me awake til this time. I really couldn't be a 100% off work until everything has been briefed/handed over/imparted. That is quite pathetic, but I have been too responsible and I need to draw a line soon. 

My heartburn's getting bad to worse recently, and it is unlike my first pregnancy where it typically happens only  at night; this time my heartburn is anytime.. I can be in the midst of something or nothing, and the surge of acidic gas will gush up to my chest and cause all the discomfort. Sometimes I wonder if my poor appetite is partly due to the heartburn. 

Honestly speaking, being pregnant is extremely demanding on the physical aspects as well as emotionally. I can hardly bend down without feeling uncomfortable with a strain on my uterus,  and also walking, carrying things without feeling breathless. 

Emotionally, I am challenged every day trying to cope with my emotions when I encounter stress, unhappiness, or anger. I'd lost it so many times that I felt disgusted by myself, eventhough I know its the pregnancy hormones making me such an a^*hole! I also at times grumbled about being burdened by this pregnancy, and was hoping that I wasn't pregnant at all. Of course, these are just angry thoughts and I would be lying if I said I didn't want to be pregnant. 

However, one obvious thing is throughout my entire pregnancy, I don't feel supported enough by KL. To him, I'm probably just a pregnant wife who is very much capable of doing things herself and that basically, there is not much for a husband to help out with. Any woman who's been pregnant before can tell you how wrong this is, and that you would be   such a jerk if you can sit and do nothing for your expecting wife! 

Jerk or not, I leave it to him. His world will change once he witness the birth of his child, and to see for himself the pain and hardship I'l be enduring during the labour. 

Trimester 3 approaching!!

Ok, i admit. I'm not very regular in posting on my blog about my pregnancy, but the fact is; I'm not even very in touch with how far along I am in my pregnancy! 

Did a count and realised I am now 27 weeks along and next week when I hit my 28th week, I will be entering the final leg - the third trimester!! Arghhhhhhh.. (Yes, this is a yelp of fright and not excitement!)

I cannot say enough how unprepared I am in this pregnancy, and I don't have anyone to blame but myself actually. Paying all my attention and focus on Rianne instead of baby K has been my agenda from April onwards as the poor primary one girl has mid-year assessment and tests; and her equally poor mommy has to rush home every night to coach her in her daily homework and set aside time to revise for her assessment and spelling.. 

My very kind and careful gynae Dr Wee has instructed me to take adequate rest from my 24th week onwards, but I kinda ignored his good intentions since he was asking to place me on hospitalization leave from 24 weeks on til my delivery. I can't be on hospitalization leave due to work. I know this is ridiculous, but blame myself for being overly responsible to my job. I know that it will not be too much to ask when I decide to work from home from June til I deliver a month or so later!

Ok, i promise to give more updates as soon as I am more 'relaxed' in my work schedule! For now, just to let you peeps know; baby K is a little active boy who wriggles, kicks at every chance he has; and his strength is something not to be reckoned with!!!! Hahaha.. 

Baby stuff inventory

This is just gonna be a practical post where it will be serving as a checklist of baby essentials for me & KL. Time to check and get ready to spend some cash!!!

Baby bedding

- Crib/Cot : preferably a wooden crib for its sturdiness and easier to match any other furniture in our new place. CONS: Space consuming, hardly mobile so only location for it will be the baby's bedroom.

- Playpen : An alternative to the crib/cot, but is flimsy and can get damaged easily. Mobile and can keep easily. The previous one for Rianne in pink 'could' (haven't check) still be in good condition, but doubting it as it has been 7 years since. 

- Pillows/blankets/support around the sides of the baby's bed (be it crib or playpen) : We kept many pillows, bolsters and even a homemade beanie pillow from my past pregnancy. Some were probably used very minimally as Rianne didn't sleep in the playpen for very long, she loves snuggling in my bed with me! Expecting some blankets/wraps as baby gifts when I deliver.

Mattress : The one used by Rianne should still be around. Of course judgement is very much paramount to determine whether the mattress is fit for use after 7 years. 

Musical mobiles : These are the musical toy that you attach onto the baby's bed. Apart from the music, they are usually twirling/spinning as well which I believe is to stimulate the infant's responses to moving objects. Not sure how this will help induce sleep, that's why the one Rianne had was not a spinning one.

Mosquito net : Applicable and available still at this age and time??!! I say, definitely unnecessary!

Bath time items 

Bath tub : Get a new one for goodness sake!! Especially if you had a tub for your previous kids and you kept them for use in your laundry when the kids can no longer fit in them; like Rianne's tub.

Anti-slip mat (both inside the tub and on the area where the bath is happening) : Consequence of not having one is obviously serious, need I say more?!

Towels (include the soft towel for wiping the baby's face, and rubbing the gums. Oral hygience starts young!) : Fabric and cleanliness is of utmost importance! That's why new towels should be bought!

Toiletries and creams : Best bet to start your newborn with those non-fragant shower gels and shampoos with hypo-allergies components! You don't want to have to deal with baby rash in the early infant days! The 'real' baby rash will hit you outside of shower time, trust me. That said, it's always advisable to stand by nappy rash cream especially since breastfeeding causes very good bowel frequency and the stools are usually quite nasty; watery that is. Baby lotion - a must for that bonding time when massaging your little one after bath! 

Squeaky bath toys : Not much of a purpose at this time, and might even be hazardous since you need to be using both hands to hold the baby as well as bathing him at the same time. 

For the head/hair : I heard baby oil is good for 'naturing' a head full of nice black hair. But no harm with that 1 or 2 drops onto your baby's scalp. Soft hair brush also required, though the baby may not have lots of hair in the early babyhood.

Clothes, accessories

One-sies : This is probably the smartest invention in the baby fashion world where wearing and taking off is super easy! I reckon there can be no fixed number of how many onesies you should have for your newborn. As many as you like and get those with cute, humourous messages across the onesie!!

Diapers : The brand is the most sensitive topic here. I am not biased towards 'brand-less' sold at supermarkets, but I just want to be sure that whatever brand of diapers I put onto my baby do not induce some crazy bum rash or are super flimsy and fall off after holding just 1 pee! 

Soft cloth diapers : Most cost saving, but is that practical or not? The person washing will scream "Enough!" if your baby's peed or pooped after every feed for up to 10 times a day (Rianne's poop record when she was being breastfed!) 

Socks, booties, mittens, caps : I think there's a certain level of necessity for them, though it looks like you are plainly accessorizing your newborn with extra items on their little hands, feet and head. The little ones might scratch their face with their un-cut fingernails, unless you are daring enough to cut the nails of an infant! Soles get cold just like adults, and maybe easier than adults since they are used to the warmth inside their mommies for a good 9/10months! Similarly they never have their heads and scalp exposed to the cold/aircon, so keep it warm!

Swaddle cloth : They say keep the baby wrapped up as long as possible to keep them tame and less 'wriggly'! I think the baby anyway would appreciate the warmth, rather than exposing their bare skin to the cold.

A bean bag/pillow : Weirdly this item is often regarded as very important to have for all newborns! Made of shells of beansprouts or green beans, the pillow has to be rested against the baby's chest with his/her arms underneath it. This is so that the baby will not 'jerk' too much when he is frightened (eg, by sounds of the thunder). Maybe people often associate jerking with fits, and try means to minimize?

Lots of hankies : I remember this essential very vividly as Rianne was a baby who regurgitate her milk after almost every feed for the first few months of life. 

I guess we can only add the other required items as we go along and as needed, else this checklist may even develop into a storybook!! Hah!! :p