This is what I shared at Grandpa's funeral service. I still can't read it without crying. I miss him so much!
First off, on behalf of our entire Brendsel family, thank you for coming today to help us celebrate the life of my grandpa.
When I was asked to say a few words during this service, my first thought was ‘How on earth am I going to hold myself together to share memories of a man that I loved so much, and a man that I will miss so much? I’m going to be an emotional mess’.. but then I remembered that Grandpa was usually a crying mess too- he passed his soft hearted-ness on to a lot of us, so there was really no need for me to stress or worry if I cried when I spoke.. we can all have a good cry together.
Until Grandpa passed away on Thanksgiving morning, I was blessed to have all of my grandparents still living, so this experience is new for me. It’s been heartbreaking & beautiful at the same time. Heartbreaking because he was SO good at loving us, so genuine & sweet. We are all going to miss little things that he did that made each of us feel special in our way. And it’s been beautiful, because his faith was strong. He told us he was ready to go, that he wasn’t scared, that he had lived a good, long life and that he was at peace with his time here with us coming to an end. Hearing someone you love tell you they are ready to be with Jesus is a very beautiful thing.
I always joked with Gramps that I was his favorite. He would just smile & tell me I was extra special. He was definitely extra special too and I made sure he knew that, especially in his last days with us. I held his hand, kissed him a ridiculous amount & told him I loved him too many times to count. A week ago today, my mom and I were up in the hospital with him in the evening. We were waiting for him to get settled in for a good night of sleep before we left for the night. He got a second wind and all of a sudden wanted to eat the ice cream the nurses had brought in for him. I’m not sure he had eaten much else that day, so mom fed him his ice cream, the entire dish! That night he hadn’t really said my name or acknowledged me like he normally would have, so I wasn’t really sure he 'knew' I was there. My mom commented to him about his lips being so cold from all the ice cream he was eating and he said ‘Don’t tell Jamie, she’ll just want to give me a kiss again!’ We laughed and laughed- gramps did know I was there, and I did give him another kiss or two.
I will never forget the phone call I got the next afternoon, and the words ‘They hung grandpa’s butterfly.’ The butterfly is a special symbol they put up to alert staff and other visitors that that particular veteran was in their final hours or days. I got to the VA a short while later. Grandpa hadn’t been alert much that whole day & hadn’t really spoke either. Once again, it was was heartbreaking and beautiful. When I got ready to leave that night, I went to Grandpa’s bed side to tell him I was going to head home, and that I loved him. Sweet gramps managed to say ‘I love you too’ in a whisper none of us were expecting. There wasn’t a dry eye in his room. Those words, ‘I love you too’ were the last words he ever said.
That was what he was best at..loving people. Whether it be grandma, and the love he showed her every day by taking care of her, his kids, grandkids or great grandkids that he was extra proud of, to neighbors or strangers. You hear the saying ‘Go and be the hands & feet of Jesus.’ and he was just that. He gave selflessly, loved big and always thought of others before himself. Gramps was one of a kind, and I feel extra special that he was a part of my life.
