So....I just got a phone call. A phone call about the problems going on with a friend and their marriage. Marriage!  How can I  forget about all the relationships around me? I have watched a friend struggle through a nasty divorce and gracefully come out on the other side, but it was not easy. Now I have several friends and family struggling with their marriages. I have always been interested in marriage and family in terms of social norms, but as it hits home and I start looking up more and more research on marriage; it is scary. Half of all marriages will end in divorce, one third of all marriages will face infidelity, and sadly enough most marriages fail within seven years (give or take two years). I say all this because we need to step into marriage knowing that is it work! Hard work! It is not a simple next step...it is a committment. It takes time and communication and no marriage is perfect because we are humans and we are not perfect. In discussing this with a friend, my marriage was compared to the perfect marriage and while I thank them for the compliment I really want to tell them all the things/issues we have made it through. We were young when we got married. I had just turned 21 and Landon had just turned 22. We were both in school with jobs that paid next to nothing and while we had some help our decisions were not necessarily smiled upon. I can say that I learned early on that compromise is key as well as picking your battles! We also made "rules" together. These were not to tell each other what to do, but to pick important issues we felt needed to be addressed  with known expectations so that our marriage was not compromised. Anyway, I am rambling....point is marriage can be fun and awesome, but it is work and one person working on it while the other takes care of themself does not work. My last point is and I beg this(while I don't condone divorce)...do not stay together for the kids!  You can say what you will, but they know your dysfunction, they sense your stress, and your are modeling behavior that they will find appropriate in their marriages later on. OK.vent.over.

 

Quick thoughts.......June 30th 2012.
The last day of  June. A month ago summer had just begun as school let out and I took a deep breath both excited and nervous. I will not be returning to my teaching job next year due to several personal / family reasons. The decision was made with great consideration and Landon and I really talked it out for about two months. It was a difficult and heartbreaking decision.  I worked so hard to get where I was and now I feel as though I took two steps back, but guess what? I have my kids. I will have lunch with them, have time for special projects and adventures, and mostly I will be there. I am blessed to have that opportunity. My day will come when they will roll their eyes because I have a suggestion or choose to attend an event, they will ask why I have to get in their business, and they will not grab my hand as we get out the car because they are "too cool".  That day is closer than my mind will allow me to believe, but it is there. So I get a few more years of "being there" and I am happy for that.  

While all the decision making was going on regarding my job and what we should do, Landon springs his own surprise on me with some of his thoughts. Gotta love timing and God's sense of humor. It wil be great and I know this, but I am a planner and a need to know how it will end person. Long range planning and short term results!  So as we embark on yet another Sparks journey, we will pray through it and for it and know that God's hand is on us the entire time! I admire my husband and am proud of him. I really want him to hear his heart and follow it and know I will support him.

Life As We Know It!

As with any Monday, I never felt like the weekend gave me enough time. Especially time with my kids. My additional responsibilities had my attention. My husband and I also needed time for just us, so we went to a movie and dinner. Sunday we rushed to church, missing our church nursery duty because we slept through the alarms, and then returned home where I felt miserable. I slept for almost three hours. I woke up and realized all that needed to be done for Monday. Needless to say it didn't happen and Monday started off ridiculously crazy.  I miss my kids in the morning. Most days I am out the door before they even wake up and it makes the day long. How do people balance??? I am unbalanced.

Ha! A little over a month...WATCH OUT

So there is a first time for everything...it has only been a little over a month and here I am. Today I am blogging because I need to.  I have been running (all self induced situations) around like a chicken with my head cut off and finally today, after getting all my orders in the mail, I decided that I wanted to eat dinner and go to bed. Well I ate dinner, bathed two wild children, gave my awesome husband a great big hug and then thought I need five minutes for me. So here I am - ready to type for my release and off to bed I go. 
I am not even sure where to start simply because there has been so much going on. I have been monogramming and appliquing (not sure if that is really a word???) to no end, which is great, but with a full time teaching job, two children, a husband, and well other duties; I am exhausted.

I can start by sharing that Cam lost another tooth. I love him so much it is crazy and love his "Landon" like ways.  Landon is my husband and is a wonderful man, husband, and daddy, but the man CANNOT take blood. Which gets me to the back to Cameron. His tooth is loose, but he refuses to let anyone pull it. Finally after lengthy conversations about how it needs to come out, he agrees to let me pull it. I get a washcloth and go to yank and it pops.  If you have ever lost or pulled a tooth, you probably remember the "pop". The pop sent Camerin into a frenzy yelling about his tooth, however the tooth is still attached. I cannot help but laugh. Landon enters the room and tells Cameron is going to pull the tooth.  Cameron allows this and the tooth is out in like two seconds.  [Landon part here] What happens after you pull a tooth?  Blood. Cam freaks and when I say freaks, he keeps touching his mouth and carrying on about how much blood is in his tooth.  We finally get him to calm down and the blood eventually stops.  Fast Forward to the next day....We (Cam, Laney, and I ) are all in Target. They are playing on the toy aisle while I talk to my friend Amy on the phone. I am telling her about the tooth and the blood, laughing about Landon's dislike of blood when Cameron whips around the corner and says "Mom, just so you know, I don't do blood!" Love it...just like his daddy. 

Where is Laney in all this?  Trying to convince us she has a loose tooth at the ripe old age of 4. She will keep you laughing! Her latest obsession is my embroidery machine.  She has great ideas and is always wanting to suggest designs. I love it. I got a text from her aftercare teacher telling me about their conversation regarding shirts.  Needless to say, we now have one in the works for Ms. Tiffany.  Laney is too much fun and sometimes just too much! 

What else....well I don't like airing my dirty laundry, but after almost 11 years of marriage, I think we had our BIGGEST disagreement/issue ever. I will say that thanks to our communication skills (definitely more Landon's than mine) we came through it, but not a situation I wish to do again. This is not to say our marriage is perfect, that is impossible, but it is good. And as cheesy as this is going to sound, I honestly think I am in love with him more than when we got married.  It is amazing what God gives us! 

What else? Well...honestly I am too tired to think . Anxiously antincipating May...well February 17th....heck any day for rest especially since ball season is on the way.............

Last but not least....can I please tell you how excited I am about a special person expecting a baby boy!!!! Crazy to be this excited, but I cannot wait!

Off to bed I go!

A New Year!

A New Year....there are always so many great expectations for the "New Year".  This year I will ____ and ______ and ______....by December I will be a new person.  Ha, if only. This year I am not making any great resolutions for a new me. I am happy with me!  Are there things that could be improved or changed for the better? Definitely, but I can do that without making crazy goals on the New Year high that will only cause me misery when I fail to reach them.  2011 has come and gone, but not without huge adjustments and growth. I can honestly say it was "good" year.  I have a wonderful husband who stands by me regardless of my craziness at times. He supports and loves me while all the while probably wondering why the heck he married me. I have two wonderful children and when I say this please don't think I live in a bubble where my children do no wrong and we revolve everything we do around them.  When I say wonderful, I mean they are fun, loving, silly, entertaining, whining, crying, mischievous, smart, hardheaded, persevering, stubborn and lovable. We have great days and we have days that I cannot wait until bedtime.  I have family and good friends who have helped me and I have great families that love my kids. This alone has helped us survive

 2011. That said, yea 2012!  I am looking at more huge adjustments and leaps of faith in 2012 and pray I hear HIM and not me throughout it all. Sometimes we get so fixed on what we want and what we think is best we forget to be still and listen. So I am horrible at sitting still and I am horrible at listening, so I have some work to do. 

 

  

Christmas went well and while we did a lot of running, we also did alot of work with our new embroidery machine. I have so many ideas, I don't know where to begin and that is what kept me up until 3:00 most nights throughout our break. Cameron and Laney thoroughly enjoyed Christmas and definitely received what they wished for.  As I ran around trying to get this and that and hoping to find a certain this or a certain that, my children really showed me the pure joy they receive from "simple" things. On Christmas morning, Cameron and Laney ran into the living room with great anticipation. Cameron found the new 3DS that he had asked for along with a Alabama (Big AL) pillow pet.  He looked at these and then his eyes got big and he shouted with great excitement. What could have outdone exactly the two things he asked for???  None other than a dinosaur fleece blanket!  Yes, he has held onto that blanket every since and it is in his bed. He did not ask for the blanket, but it was something Santa thought was cute. The blanket probably cost a tenth of the 3DS. Funny huh?  I love moments like this.   This is not to say he did not love everything he received, just funny what was most exciting. As you can see Laney was in full Christmas spirit and had a wonderful reaction to EVERYTHING she opened.  I think she was overstimulated by it all! 

 

I learned some unexpected, but exciting news during Christmas from two people in my life and cannot wait to see how great their 2012 will be! 

Oh, one thing I am going to do is try to blog more....LOL  

 

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

On the verge...

On the verge of new adventures, turning points, and finding balance.  I can honestly say I don't like change.  For many that know me, I don't like moving, I like to know what's coming, I trust few and hold the ones I do close.  I am not necessarily pessimistic, but realistic. I act sometimes without thinking it all through and when I make my mind up you can forget it!  That said...I need a change. Not sure what that entails, but it is needed.  I am excited, scared, nervous, and anxious all in one, but it will happen.  

In the meantime, I love my job. Teaching is my passion, possibly my ministry as much as it can be. I love my children, Cameron and Laney, and while they can make me crazy, they are loads of fun.  Cameron keeps me guessing and well Laney keeps me on my toes. 

Cameron is in first grade and has an AWESOME teacher, Mrs. Bostwick.  I don't think we could ask for better!!! Laney is in JR. K and loves her teacher Ms. Holly.  We were very nervous after having Mrs. Lisa last year because we didn't think we could love another teacher the same, but we do!  Cameron and Laney look forward to school and that always makes it easier.  We are finishing out soccer and while it was entertaining, I am HAPPY it is almost over!  

Halloween was fun with Cameron being an Angry Bird and Laney being Pinky Pie, a My Little Pony, character.  Cameron switched from his Ben 10 idea two days before he needed a costume, so I got creative and came up with an Angry Bird and created it in one night. Needless to say between costumes and festivities "Halloween week" was exhausting.

We are gearing up for Thanks giving and had fun making Laney's shirt tonight.  Cameron is making his tomorrow. I bought material for Laney's Christmas dress and for Cam's Christmas shirt and I am going to try and conquer those over Thanksgiving break.  Ahhhh...two more weeks and we get a week of relaxation....well I can dream. It will be hectic, but at least I won't be getting up at 5:00 am. 

Ha...Only a Year and a Month

Well once I again I am on top of it -only a year later to update! LOL
So much to say and my fingers just can't move fast enough. I completed my student teaching early due to being offered a position right next door to my student teacher's room- COMPLETELY a GOD thing! I won't say the transition was completely flawless as I still hyperventilate thinking about leaving my kids daily, but it happened when it needed to. I have signed my contract for next year and God has worked it out so that I have another great nanny lined up! Libby is headed to UGA after surviving three years with the Sparks and Ally, her sister, will be taking over. I am hoping it works for Ally as well since she has less than 20 weeks until she welcomes a little girl, Payton. Don't know what I would do without the Booskas!!

Cam just completed kindergarten and we survived our first year. The great news he was tested in reading and is currently reading on an almost third grade level!! He lost his first tooth in April and has 2 permanent teeth already in. He is so much fun to be around and is always "investigating" and finding out all about things around him. To have his perseverance and curiosity!!

Laney received a class award for most likely to run a Fortune 500 company! Hilarious - she definitely keeps us all on our toes. We made it through another year of baseball and Cam really improved this year. We also completed our first dance recital and WOW is that Laney's thing! When she said she just wanted to tumble next year, I told her that was fine, but she wouldn't have a recital she quickly changed her mind. I am not sure where she came from, but she is a true joy (as long as she is not whining) and she is very bright as well. Before her PK-3 year was up she knew everyone's birthday (month and day)from her class and was reading all of their names as well as spelling/writing some. Her middle name, Lorelai, means siren and how fitting!

Landon and I celebrated 10 years of marriage on May 26th. It would have been at the ball field,
but it rained so we ended up in ball stuff at a wing house. This was totally appropriate for us in case some of you are taken aback by the extravagance of it all. ;) I was in love with him at 18 years old and can honestly say I am more in love with him now. Sounds cheesy, but we have made it through some interesting times. We have made some life altering decisions (right or wrong), moves (more than I care to remember), job changes, college graduations, and we have welcomed two wonderful children into this world. I know people say that kids change things and they definitely do, but we survived my emotional break down after Cameron when he wouldn't eat or sleep and we survived Laney's reflux that was so bad we were terrified she would aspirate during the night and we would never know. We have made it through a horrible business investment which cost us huge financially and we have come out on the other side smiling. I have grown in my faith and because of Landon's lead I have become more knowledgeable of HIS word. I am happy my children are being raised in a Christian home and hope their trials are fewer because they know the Lord.

Now I will start updating pictures....this could take a while!