The Blogger Daily

when it does fall apart

Thursday, June 29, 2006

Nephrite at 8:08:00 PM

so.
what you've implied is that i'm just a zero. zilch. nada. nothing. nil. o.
that i'm like, irrelevant.

no, im not being dramatic.
you can be offhand and nonchalant to people whom you're not close to.
and so what they say dun hurt shit.
but its those that u regard as close that you've gotta be wary abt, ain't it?
the ones u trust are the ones u fear at the same time.
these are the ones that have the power to make a single indifferent comment feel like a thousand knives stabbing into u.
the ones where u feel safe around, where u dun have to keep ur guard up.
when u think u can say whatever u wanna around.
its when sorry seems to be the hardest and the worst word that crosses your lips.
when unshed tears collect at the thot you could've done something wrong.
when u feel ur heart literally ache.
when u feel like shit.

so go ahead rub it in then pretend everything's alright, right?
wrong.
its not okay.
its so NOT ok.
especially when u have ppl and i don't.
so don't remind me.
wait, u've always done that.
i'm pissed and sad and hurt.
d'ya noe u can be so cold sometimes you're worse than him.
but hey, since u drew the line all by yourself, i'll reward you.
and i hope u're happy with what u get.
im hating u right now.

wad i can say is, i'm glad u drew the freakin' line b4 i cared more.
but u chose a screwed up time to do it.

GAY

Wednesday, June 28, 2006

Nephrite at 3:57:00 PM

Jade, you're a Siren!

Like the beautiful sea mermaids who've swum before you, Siren, you certainly have a way of drawing people in. Whether wooing a crush with your alluring voice or impressing someone with your unique take on the world, you're sure to captivate more than your share of audiences.

It must be the balance between your glittering personality and your individual style that keeps friends and family enamored by your presence. From being able to predict next season's "it" color to pairing leopard print with plaid before it hits the pages of Vogue, people see you as a fashion goddess. You may not want to admit it, but you're part trendsetter and people look to you for direction.

Of course, you know there's more to life than shopping for the latest adorable accessory. You pursue success in all aspects of life — from offering creative insights at work to running marathons. You have big dreams, Siren, and by keeping them in sharp focus, you're sure to come out a winner.

--------Ohmygodi'mthecreaturethatKILLSMENinthegreekmyth?!-------------

wow. that's the best thing i've ever heard!
i get to KILL MEN!
yay! xD

but thats the only part i think its true la.
the rest is utter crap. i mean, HELLO?
who am i kidding here? -alluring voice-?
gimme a breakkk---

anyways.
haha.
kim says my blog is stagnant.
ok la, it kinda is.
but only for the time being plus i dun get enough com time.
and sometimes, blogging here isnt the best cux u cant always say what u really wanna say.
i think.
haha.

hmm.
depression is my next obsession.
why?
its so easy to get sad depressed etcetc but hard to suddenly get happy
i guess its the same with it being easier to be bad than be good?
oh wth.

TWO more freakin; days my frens, just two
and we can cut ourselves some slack b4 geArin' up fer the next one.
`ren.

i haven't gone shopping recently.
-but its not as if i have money to spend la.
i haven't read any of the storybooks OR the novels on my list.
-cuz if i started on one i'd nv stop n its a hazard to my studies(rolls eyes)
i haven't stoned for a day
-no time. but stoning feels good tho its really useless.
i haven't really enjoyed myself fully
-everytime i go out, exams+studying is constantly hovering

is wad im going through now actually considered LIVING?
cux it really does NOT seem as though i'm living my life the way i really want.
technically, i'm just tying myself up and binding my life the way women bound their feet and for what? to suit what a bunch of other people think youths should be doing with their lives but its stifling. seriously.
grr. sighs. its not as though anyone can do much about the way the world works.
naivete rocks n sucks and the same freakin' time.

to ALL MEN, or rather the opposite sex:

` You could call me six times but still I won't pick up the phone
You could spend all your money on me but still I'll say no
You could write a million letters everyday confessing to me
That I am the girl of your dreams
But nobody ever asked me
I never looked at you that way
'Cause I always thought you were gay

Sunday, June 25, 2006

Nephrite at 12:27:00 AM

`SOS please someone help me, its not easy, for me to feel this way...

`what do you do when it all falls apart?

wow, the computer can read bad vibes now.
nad, lyd, u there?
r u reading this?
those two songs are what came on when WW3 started.
at home.
i should've stayed out later.
it's ruined the euphoria i had earlier.

god. help me.

take a deep breath,
its a dream, its a dream.
a really bad one.
the kind u cant wait to get over and done with.

leaving, on a jet plane.

Wednesday, June 21, 2006

Nephrite at 10:36:00 PM

i wish i was...

.....leaving, on a jet plane, don't know when i'll be back again.

a pity its not true.
haha.

im done for, this prelims, i mean.
what to do what to do.

-wrings hands franitically-
wait.

what CAN i do?
`nothing.

tonned again last night at the airport.
for some reason last night wasn't as productive as the first time..
then again maybe it was cux that thursday was the one week anniversary,
as well as the first time i tonned to study.
haiz.

'cuz the girl, that u want, she was tearing us apart,
cuz she's everything. everything, im not.

tonn again

Friday, June 16, 2006

Nephrite at 6:18:00 PM

the first time i tonned at the airport last nite.

i think it was quite successful.
as in,
i didn't fall asleep, i managed to complete lit.
and at least i didnt waste time on the stupid drama im stuck on.
gosh.
i can't wait to finish the A's but at the same time i'm dreading it.
how i wish.
but if wishes were fishes, all wishes would come true.

`where were these fountains when she was living?
all frozen up.

haiz. the airport made memories rush to my head.
too bad this time the studying was done in s'pore
haha.

in the middle of it all, we cracked up.
touty! quick! find a way to sneak out of ur hostel!!
*grins mischieviously*

`i just can't get you outta my head.

lydlyd!
im so so sorry i only just saw ur tags.
the first one is sO oFF. haha.
i think.
but yea. i'mm looking forward to going out with ya'll.
miss the days in MT class.

`excellent wretch! perdition catch my soul,
but i do love thee,

and when i love thee not,

`chaos has come again.

`you make me wanna la la.

Monday, June 12, 2006

Nephrite at 12:18:00 AM

shiat.
the entry i posted after i got back was deleted.
man.

here goes again.
i am sick of....
.....tomato soup
........chicken, potatoes, bread, sausage

i'm in love with....
.....history
........geography
...........literature.

i wanna go back to the UK.

but there was zzz-ing.
and now im lagging.

i wanna go back to the UK.

i've found a new name,
i've learned new games.

and now i regret not getting more souveniors.
manohmanohman.

the ice cold lake
the haunting black cape
the shit on the hills
and the silenced looks.

lip balm on cheeks and honey,
sadistic innocent quiet demeanor
blur but crazy stuff in the hotel
power naps that evolved,
guaiguai into idiot
wheel.
zzzzzzzing.
nephrite.
sleepy tooty.
chachacha.
london BRIDGE with POKER faces.
munch much munch.
webbsisters. rihanna. -_-
`tOnners, we sO rock.