First of all, i would like to say that i am very disappointed in blogger!! i had this whole thing filled out last night and i was all ready to post but i clicked the wrong button! AHHHH... so, when i tried to go back and find it, i couldn't! it was gone, vanished, POOF in thin air! very upsetting!

Anyhow,wow time is flying by and it just will not slow down! Not even for ME!! Ahhhh!! Langely's birthday was yesterday, and I went to wal mart and bought myself the fourth harry potter book IN PAPERBACK, for a whopping $5.97!!!! What a deal! I also bought my very first DVD... CUTTING EDGE!!! (for the low price of $9.47!!!) which my "bossom frriend" Julie and I thouroughly enjoyed!

I've been doing WAY to much baby-sitting lately and I think it's finally getting to me!! Tommorrow I have to be at this certain house at 7:30 AM!!!!!!!!! and I have to stay with the kids overnight while their mom goes to Dallas to shop! Now, exactly what am I supposed to do with 3 kids ages 1, 3, and 5, for 30 whole hours?!? Well, I'll tell you what: TV. ha ha ha . My secret weapon!!! Ok no, but really, I've been stressing over this. I don't want them to be bored to death. (I knew I should have watched more baby-sitters club episodes!)

Moving right along, the biggest news of the day is this: I bought a guitar today!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Finally!!!! It's a Takamine G series that was originally $399 and was on sale for..... ooooo.... ahhhhh.... (gasp) $199!! I also purchased a really good case that was originally $150, but they knocked it down to $109 for me and then took another $40 off of that!!!! then i decided to buy an extra pack of strings (since i'll probably break some here soon). so in the end I walked out of the guitar center with over $565 worth of equipment for $299.47. Boy am I a bargain shopper or what?!?!? (ok, ok, so I was basically real lucky, but what can I say?) Anyway, that's all for now I suppose.

Maybe someday I'll find some time to re-write all the junk I had typed out yesterday but until then, see ya next time!

Happiness is:

-a cold Dr. Pepper
-Lazy afternoons
-A cool breeze on a 102 degree day
-Friendship
-A trampoline
-Swimming pools
-Family
-Fresh bacon
-Inside jokes
-Naivity
-Church
-Peace
-Cats
-Remembering the name of something when you've been thinking about it for hours
-Cookie dough
-Krispy Kreme (at 11 at night!)
-Pity parties
-Roadtrips
-Independent films
-Soundtracks
-A song that has finally downloaded after you've been waiting 3 hours for it to finish
-Target
-Pad thai
-Sales
-Good books
-Large old trees that you can climb into and fall asleep in
-Anne of green gables
-Midnight movie premiers
-Art camp
-Dancing
_Paperback harry potter books
-A good audition
-Shakespeare done well
-Musicals
-Rain
-Cd's with the song lyrics included
-Chocolate
-Good quotes
-New books
-Ditching school to go out to lunch
-Tax refunds
-Days off
-Driving for hours with no destination
-Lists
-Journals
-Breakfast
-Free stuff
-A good workout
-Ice skating
-Sleeping in
-Tuition deferments
-Magazines
-Christmas
-Emo!
-Hand-written notes and letters
-Guitars!
-Snow
-Fresh bread
-Pets
-Candles
-Stationary
-Pictures
-Picture frames
-Scrapbooks!
-Memories
-Taste of china 5.95 super buffet
-Laptops
-Cheesiness!
-Realizing that your gas tank can go well below "E"
-Discovering that things aren't as bad as you expecte them to be
-Suprise friendships
-Concerts
-Compliments
-Tj Maxx
-Tubing
-Laying out on the grass under the stars at night
-Star Wars
-That new toothpaste and toothbrush you get when you go to the dentist
-Winning a free dr. pepper from that stupid under the cap game
-Blogging
-Kazaa
-E-mail
-A good movie
-Hearing a live orchestra for the first time
-Learning that there are others like you and that you aren't alone
-Fitting in
-Being an individual
-Believing
-Answered prayers
-Love.

But above all... happiness is relative.
So tell me: What is happiness to you?

Well, Langley and I finally got to hang out. We went and saw The Sum of All Fears. Kinda creepy considering that that kind of warfare is possible. Anyways, my aunt and cousins left to go to another relatives house, so my home is back down to 3 again. I realized that a month from now I will be on my way to college... with my mom. She's taking me and hopes to make a fun trip out of it. I hope it turns out that way. It makes me a little nervous though, I must confess. We actualy had a good day today without getting into any arguements. We went and saw men in black II, which was pretty good. Funny. Then we shopped a little. I was happy today.

I passed my AP english lit/comp test. I've known for a while now, but I felt like letting everyone know. (that is assuming that anyone actually reads this besides my friends.)

Speaking of my friends. I've been feeling quite neglected lately. Not by all of them of course, but by a select few. langley just got back from 2 weeks with her dad and everytime I call, she's with her boyfriend. obviously our hoes before bros motto has gone out the window. Ok, so basically I'm over reacting, but isn't that what the world expects from a sullen teenager? Then there's the usual group problem I have with some friends that I went to school with before I moved. We don't really hang out anymore because I moved a whole 10 minutes away and got a job, so it was too much of an inconvienence for some of them. I still try to be part of the group, but I'm easily over looked because of the recent circumstances. For instance, we always celebrate our birthdays by going out to eat with the group, mine has been overlooked 2 years now (and they all know) and we nevee did anything about it. Well, just recently they missed another friends birthday and we're all expected to go out asap to celebrate. Now I know, I know, I'm being totally nitpicky and whiny, but this kind of thing happens all the time, and now I'm to the point where I don't want to hang out with them anymore, and I feel kinda guilty. let's just say that we don't have much in common now. We're still friends, it's just not like were "bossom friends" (as Anne of Green Gables would say). Anywho, it's not going to get better, I mean, if we couldn't get things to work out when i'm a mere 10 minutes away, it's never gonna work when i'm 1300 miles away at school next year.

Ok, moving on from all the griping. If you're still with me then wow I'm proud of you because i would've left by now! I have a ton of books that i have planned to read before college starts! I'm currently on The Two Towers (part 2 of the lord of the rings series) and it's moving kinda slow. I already reread all of the Harry Potter books except for book 4 (i'm about to reread that) and I am hopelessly awaiting book 5. Unfortunately word on the street is that Ms. JKRowling isn't even through writing it yet. I recently read "Ender's Game", and I strongly recommend it! I plan on starting it's sequel, "Speaker for the Dead", soon; as well as it's counter novel, "Ender's Shadow." It was written from the opposing viewpoint of the first book. I'm also looking into "White Oleander", "We Were the Mulvaney's", and "The Remnant" (the next book in the Left Behind Series). If you have any info on any more good books, or any of the above, feel free to contact me! that's all for now, be sure and stop by later for music news!

I bought a bunch of college neccessities yesterday and today. And just a note of wisdom to all the other college bound folks out there... prepare to spend lots of money on stupid stuff like: socks. shampoo, toothpaste and laundry detergent. Good grief, I've dropped over $150 all ready. Just leave it to commercialsm to take advantage of consumers!! Meanwhile my house has been crazy since we have 4 people visiting and now 7 under one roof. I think I'm going insane. To make matters worse, my mom is driving me nuts! She's been going on random power trips all summer. A lot of it has to do with me going away I suppose, but for goodness sake she could cut me some slack instead of going postal.

I was in the car when memories of that terrible freshman year came flooding back.

I wanted to fit in so badly. Unfortunately "individualism" had not yet entered my vocabulary and social status dominated my life. By some freak accident I had done it: I had managed to get myself stuck in Show Choir, the elite "upper-classman" only class. To put it simply... everyone HATED me. I can honestly say that it was one of the worst experiences of my life.

I remember prereparing our class float for the town parade, I wasn't really required to be there but I went to help out, and mainly to earn brownie points (don't be fooled, it was to no avail). It was bad enough having to be dropped off by my parents in front of all the other kids who could drive; but to make matters worse to seniors in charge really didn't want my help (despite the fact that they were getting nothing done except for socializing about abercrombie and annoying freshmen of course) So, they made me make posters for the back of the float. (I don't know if you've been to any parades lately, but if so, did you happen to notice the lovely back ends of all the floats??? yea, I didn't think so.) well I had the special task of writing SHOW CHOIR in big letters on a poster. Boy it was thrilling. Nonetheless, I decided to give it my all and show them up. (give me a break! I was 14 and thought that artistic skill would help the situation) Well I really did try and it turned out really good. however... when I showed my masterpiece to the powers that be, they just looked at me and said, "Hmmm, just great... did you know that you spelled CHOIR wrong?" and low and behold I looked down at the wonder and found that sure enough there plain as day was CHIOR. I wanted to cry, but instead I argued saying,"what are you talking about? That is how you spell it!" , in hopes that what I had thought to be true would seep into their heads like magic. But no it was not to be; in fact, my year of suffering was only beginning.

Ok, so the past entries have been a little cheesy, but hey, they say that college life changes everything, and given that I am on my way there for the first time, I feel hopelessly mushy so to speak. Let's just say that I am venturing far away from my miniscule hometown to go to a relatively big place. Despite the gloom of leaving my friends behind , I feel that this should turn out to be an amazing journey... and as I try to make the most out of these days in between, I'll try to keep you updated, so feel free to join the ride.

What to say when the whole world could listen?

Yesteday I went swimming. Do you know how long it's been? The water felt so fresh and cool in the unforgiving heat. I also jumped on one of those big backyard trampolines. What can I say? I think everyone should have a chance to revert back into their childhood everynow and then. As I reminice on the simple days of childhood I realize that the grass is always greener on the other side; even if it's where you've been. So it is here in smalltown America, where happiness consists of a cool pool and a trampoline on a hot summers day.

Today I went to the zoo. It's been ages. As neat as the animals were I found people watching to be more amusing: parent's dragging sweaty kids around, infants in strollers dozing as their older siblings squawk and squeal at the snakes and hippos. Why the zoo you ask? Well I do have family in town, and we were planning on it and as it turns out they were letting people in free all day. I suppose it's the simple joys of life; like a free day at the zoo that make life worthwhile.