Hmm, so how did I get here? Back to my old blog from the old era of blogspot-blogging days? Well, gloomy lazy me happened to be having school holidays and discovered that Facebook.com has had her sucked in and wasting too much of her precious time. One thing led to another and I deactivated my Facebook account for a set period of time and ventured back into my old blogs. Gotta admit writing and reading (non-electronic,real,tactile books) can be pretty..liberating actually, when you've been hooked to your electronic devices scouring through post after post on social media sites/apps. I think this bad habit of millennials may even stunt creativity and be a form of impediment to our quality of life. When I think of the contents on this blog, I can say it's a little overwhelming to contemplate on how life and technology changes altogether from one era to the next. From journals and phone calls, to blogs and MSN messenger, to FB/Twitter/Instagram and WhatsApp or...hardly chatting or catching up at all. There's a significant amount of time and energy spent, scratch that, wasted in paying attention to social media and our own upkeep of our digital selves. We lose a lot of touch with real life, real friends and real joy when we lose ourselves to the internet.
Anyway, here, is where I read some posts of the past that really digs up old memories and nostalgia. It's only when you look back do you realise and miss how carefree secondary school days were. Or how "easy" or "not that bad" things actually were in reality, as compared to the storms and harder times you may have eventually experienced. Those growing up years so innocently spent studying,in the band,learning things on life and having fun at the same time. Of course, there weren't always happy days, but there was the part where we get over rough times or move on from things which was for the good. Like how, well, I remembered not liking my secondary school and lower secondary class for many reasons and always saw greener from my circumstances. (some of which I still wonder today how it would have been had I gotten a place in a different school and upbringing) Eventually when I moved on to upper secondary and got into the course combination I wanted, I really liked my class and had fun. And since I have graduated, realised Kranji wasn't THAT bad a school as a whole.
Anyway, where am I now?
Well, I can say I've gone through very dark days and hard times, didn't exactly go through a straight path, gained varied experiences and stuff. BUT, I can at least claim to be a survivor. Let's not go into those dark parts, though, and sum up on what 6 years since 2009 had entailed me.
2010 was when I learnt my so-called "pretty bad" grades in secondary 3 were actually decent compared to how I did in secondary 4. *dry laugh* haha..My real achievement was receiving decent (though average) grades for my O levels in the end, and having improved greatly from my bad, bad, dirt bad Prelims. Qualified for JC. I was so naive, actually, still having that elitist mindset brought over from PSLE of 2006, where I wanted to go where I qualified best at, and I picked a JC before even considering the prospects of polytechnic life justbecauseIdismisseditasbeinglesssmartofachoice(jokes on me). But I guess, really, that I wouldn't have truly known then what I wanted to pursue, because I never seriously considered my career choices in secondary school. I had simply made up my mind to unrealistically aim to go into Law school after getting into the JC of my dreams and doing well for A levels. Pfft.
I'll not go into details but I did go into JC, and for some circumstances, had a break, then, for an unwise decision, went back to the same JC, then pulled out for good. Afterwards, I wanted to enrol in an Australian college for a one year pre-u course and actually got in, but couldn't accept the offer due to financial reasons. In JC, I did a combination of H2 Lit, Econs, History (biggest mistake of my JC life :x) with H1 Maths, the next year I changed to H3 Lit, Econs, Maths with H1 Chemistry. I joined the band twice playing clarinet and oboe consecutively and was in the 2012 Track team as a long-distance runner. My results were never good though I sort of did well in parts of PW and Lit. I discovered that secondary school was about growing up, JC was more of being already settled with who you are and staying, well, cool. It was a bit like high school, but probably bitchier. People cliqued up faster and backstabbed more. You had to choose who to stick to and trust more wisely. Also, you discover people from other secondary schools of different school cultures and academic abilities. I realise Kranji actually wasn't too shabby for a neighbourhood school, in terms of O level performance. In terms of students who are proficient in language and all-rounded, boy was I pretty amazed. For what it's worth, it was cool meeting people from the Arts stream who were more outspoken, hipster, fun, openminded and simply different.
So, while I didn't get to study in the Australian college, I enrolled in Singapore Polytechnic.
Life's a lot different. People there are more open, socially, though I notice that JC friendships were tighter and people studied harder due to the nature of junior college itself. I had the liberation of no Mother tongue(WHILE being able to take a foreign language), and I could take up any amount of CCAs. So far, I've gotten to the 3rd level of Japanese language (though, initially I wanted to take up French), got myself certified in Standard First Aid, Lifesaving 3 + CPR, and participated in a few runs. In all, I got myself a lot further in Poly than JC. I don't know what to say about my academics, though, as it's a different story...(I shall improve eventually and from now on, yosh!)
At first I considered Law with Management, Aviation Management, and some other humanities and culinary related courses..I ended up choosing Maritime Business from a friend's recommendation after looking into the course modules and career prospects. I chose it mostly for the monetary incentive and that maritime topics were interesting to learn. And when I started school, were my expectations of the course I chose realised? Yes and no?!
The maritime industry is definitely a lucrative choice, and whoever I've come across who's currently having a career in the maritime sector or teaching it, tell me the same things: "You made a good choice, you won't regret it." "You will be in high demand." "Good money."
When I came to realise the likely career prospects and learned more on seafaring jobs, I came to envy certain other courses and questioned my choice. Those other courses were Nautical Studies and Marine Engineering in my academic school, which I only got to know of after admission. The more I think of those courses, what I would've learnt, the opportunity to travel, the more I get such "Why didn't I consider that?!" thoughts. The other reason is that maritime business careers are mostly office-based, at the shore. It turned out that I'm not the only one who has questioned our own course choices. My classmate who felt she was in the "wrong course" wanted other courses though.
Oh...oh well. At least there ARE some modules that I genuinely liked. And, I could really consider certain seafaring or sea-related jobs after school if I want to. It's a matter of choice really, and choices can be tricky. Also, luck. I need to be optimistic about the future.
Whoa, so much for "summing up". I didn't expect to write such chunky paragraphs of retrospect! What I had initially intended was to write briefly on where I am in my life before announcing this: I'm changing the blogskin. Yeah. This childish blogskin on a whim although I don't intend on continuing this blog since I have another. I know I liked this template design initially, and still do in terms of aesthetics, but I feel agitated by its theme.
In case it won't be remembered, this is how it looks like:
Doodles and rubbish. さようなら to this and here's to moving on.
