Feb Life Updates.

Life Updates and Photo Dump.

24th Jan.

Fitstop Classes have now become a routine for me, I go for an average of 4 sessions per week and it has been great for my mental health and overall general fitness. Form still needs a lot of correcting when it comes to working with dumbbells and barbells, but there has been a definite improvement in my overall fitness level.

 

On this day, I went for a class with my friend, we had lunch afterwards, this photo was taken whilst I was waiting for her and her wife (who happens to be the co-founder) to close up the gym. She has been my social anchor for Saturday classes because those sessions are always packed and it's nice to go to such classes knowing there will at least be a friend present in class that I can approach and group up with.

After our meal, I headed over to her place with her to chill while her wife had a Private Coaching session to attend, my plan had been to go to check out her place and leave within maybe 2 hours, but I ended up staying pretty late. She was very generous and kept offering me booze, so I had many many many cups of alchochol, even though I am not a drinker and couldn't appreicate the many cups of liquor.

One of her friend, whom I have met at the gym class before, came over mid-way through, so my friend offered to cook for us and started preparing dinner, then her wife joined us afterwards, I even ended up meeting her wife's Mum at night, it was quite unexpected. 

I felt socially fufilled that day and at that moment, I just felt really happy that I had made the choice to join the gym and had the chance and a reason to reconnect with her.

7th Feb.

I started swiping on Hinge again, matched with a few profiles and ended up going for a meal with this one guy I had been chatting with for 2 weeks or so.

We met at Outram and then walked over to Marina Bay Link Mall with the intention to get Egg Coffee from this cafe called TON Coffee, but before that, both of us were actually really hungry, I had attended a gym class that morning (without my friend because she had gone for a holiday trip to Japan), and I hadn't had anything to eat since.

We settled for this place that sells Hong Kong Diner style food, it was alright. I have to say, I was actually quite pleasaently surprised at how natural the conversation between the both of us flowed, I had my reservations prior to this meet up that it could potentially be awkward, but thankfully, he was actually quite engagining and chatty.

After this meal, we went to get the coffee, it really wasn't anything too special, getting Egg Coffee from Ton Coffee is like getting a cup of Latte from Starbucks, I mean it is good, but not really something to shout about.

We headed over to Marina Bay Shoppes as we both sipped on our drinks, and ended up in Penhaligon to smell some perfumes, they were actually quite nice, but the price point is the same as LV, so I was defintiely not going to be getting my hands on a bottle anytime soon.

After this, he told me we could visit this perfume shop at Arab Street that has been around for a while now, and I was really excited to pay them a visist, so we ended up WALKING all the way to Arab Street FROM Marina Bay Shoppes!

It was definitely not walking distance, but thankfully the weather that day was cooling, so we didn't actually end up breaking into a sweat, but my feet were really tired and by the time we got there, we were both parched because we actually were just talking the entire walk over. Had a cup of Teh Tahrik, checked out the perfume store, didn't get anything from there in the end because even though it was affordable, I didn't really smell anything I felt like I really needed to get. 

We walked around a bit more and then ended up at this cafe where we just chilled and chatted even more, I definitely enjoyed hanging out with him, but I think now that I have return back to a more grounded emotional state, my desire to look for a partner is a bit more controlled right now, so I ended up seeing viewing him more as a potential good friend to meet up with for meals every once in a while.

We have been in touch since that meet up, but the rate of texting has definitely taken a significant dip over the past week, so I am not sure if we would actually end up meeting again anytime soon, it is also Ramadan right now so I think meeting up for a meal would be a bit challenging, since he is going to be fasting until Hari Raya.

12th Feb.

We had a Company CNY Lunch.

My boss has once again given everyone a big fat Ang Pow this CNY, it's not as much as the first Ang Pow I got from him when I first joined the company, but to be getting $1000 is still huge and I am trying not to forget how generous he really is.

That being said, I definitely still want to look for a new job because I have hit the ceiling when it comes to career advancement in this company. I am hoping to join a company that I can eventually retire from and if my boss had plans to grow his business into something much larger than what it is right now, I would be very happy to continue working for him, but after being with him for a little over 2 years, I just don't see that happening.

Sigh.

14th Feb.

My friend came back from Japan, so we were able to attend the gym class together on Valentine's day! I didn't end up pairing up with her for the session though because we were on opposite ends of the gym when we were told to pair up, and since I was literally standing next to someone I had been doing my weekday classes with, and he clearly didn't have anyone he was really familiar with in the class aside from me, we paired up instead, and the session was actually great.

After the class, I went with my friend to Beauty World for brunch, she had send me a bunch of videos the day before of all this different stores that were at the hawker centre and they were stores I didn't even know exisited. 

All I can say is she knows her food becuase this Unagi Berempah was so good! We shared a plate so the portion was just nice for us to be satiated, but not full.

Then there is also this Fried Chicken store which was also really good. It's actually crazy how much fried food we were having in the morning right after gym class, we had pretty much just wasted all our excercising effort.

She also ended up paying for both items, so I told her I will pay for coffee later and we visited Offsite, which was just opposite Beauty World.

She got Matcha, I got myself this Mont Blanc Coffee and a Slice of Bannoffee Pie, her friend that I didn't know, also came like 5 minutes later to join us, it was honestly a bit awkward for me and her friend because ther really wasn't any point for us to really get to know each other since we will only probably only see each other that one time and never again, so after I was done with my coffee and pie, I excused myself and just let them catch up with one another.

I had my time with my friend, figured I should give her friend some one on one time with her as well. I headed back to Beauty World and got some desserts to go, then headed home.

The goodies my friend got me from Japan, some drip coffee packet and a small box of pistachio cookie.

15th Feb.

Had a really impromptu meet up with another friend on Sunday.

He was bored, I had nothing on, so I figured why not, and we ended up grabbing Matcha after having a meal at Chinatown Point! 

I had this Matcha place that I really wanted to try called Cremie Sippies, kept seeing them appear on my TikTok page and I was honestly a bit skeptical about how good their matcha would be considering how cutesey the whole aesthetic of the cafe was, it just didn't look like a place that would have good Matcha, but I was actually surprised.

They used a lot of Matcha powder, I actually had trouble sleeping that night.

Headed over to Vivo after that because my friend wanted to get new clothes for CNY, he looked for his stuff, I found myself just lingering in ZARA aimlessly after I was done sniffing all their perfume and then just left the shop and walked around Cold Storage for a while. Clothes shopping is a really boring affair if you are not actually getting any clothes yourself.

Came across this scent that I really really like from Zara, didn't end up getting it because my wallet is still recovering from my Diptyque purchase. I did some research when I got home and realize this scent is actually a collaboration with Jo Malone, so now I am actually quite interested to get a bottle for myself. It's an ocean and sea salt scent, which is something I have been trying to look for and add to my collection for a while now, the only thing I wasn't a huge fan of is the pepper notes. Longevity wise, I think this one last longer than their other dupe inspired perfumes, I can literally still smell it on the test strip almost a whole week later, so it's definitely something worth considering. 

  Before we called it a day, I also got a tin of Pineapple Tarts to fuel me for CNY.

CNY Break Week 16-21 Feb.

I had a 1 week break during CNY, the company was closed on Monday - Friday.

Monday

I went for a Fitstop class in the morning, and then joined one of the regualrs for breakfast because his company had closed for the week as well so he didn't have any plans. He is my go-to partner in all our gym classes, but I don't know if I would actually catergorize us as friends, he is just a very extroverted person by nature, so he can talk to pretty much anyone in class, that is a trait I am actually quite envious of because my introverted ass is constantly struggling when the class is too big.

Anyways, we had breakfast at Ya Kun, chit chat quite a bit, it was nice to actually have breakfast with him, it felt like we were on our way to becoming friends.

In the evening, I had reunion dinner with my family, so I was able to see my baby nephew and he is always a joy to have in the house. 

Tuesday 

My family has stopped doing visitation for a long time now, so we had zero plans on CNY Day 1, no gym classes were avaialble that day as well, so my family and I ended up spending the day at my Sister's place instead. 

 

Had lunch that we bought from Westmall, choices were quite limited since most of the stores were closed, and then my Sister made dinner for us, it was a very chill day.

Wednesday 

The day started with a Fitstop session in the morning, they had 2 classes opened, both were morning slots, the class was bigger than usual, I think to allow more people to join, so it went from the regular 18 max per class to 24 per class. 

That regular that I went for breakfast with on Monday told me he had been on the waitlist for this class, but that his style is he will show up regardless of whether he made it out of the waitlist or not, so he did, which resulted in the class having a total of  25 people that day.

That would have been fine, if not for the fact that we had to pair up for the last execercise, and because we had an odd number of members, someone wouldn't have a partner, and that person ended up being me. One would then question, why didn't I pair up with my go-to partner then, well, I was standing a bit too far away from him when we were told to pair up, so by the time I tried to establish eye contact with him from the other side of the gym, I already saw him fist bumping another person.

I ended up pacing on my own, which worked out fine in the end actually.

After class, my family had CNY lunch at home, so my Nephew came by again, along with my Grandma and one of my Aunt. It was nice to be able to play with my Nephew twice in a week.

Thursday

Nothing going on on Thursday, I did go to Decathalon at Clementi Mall to get more gym clothes, figured I could use more so I can actually attend more classes per week.

I think all the stores had already opened, but I didn't stay too long, there really isn't much to do at Clementi Mall anyways. 

Friday

Another gym class in the morning to start the day, but instead of going for my usual 7am class, I decided to go for the later, and much quieter 8.30am one instead since I had no work and I really needed to take a break from the 7am crowd after that massive 25 people class on Wednesday.

The class on Friday only had 6 of us, it was nice to actually be with such a small class again. 

After class, I got dessert from Beauty World before heading home, then left home in the afternoon hoping to get a haircut, only to find out the salon was still closed for CNY, so I got some snacks from Jason's Marketplace instead and lunch from Burger King, then headed home.

Saturday

Morning class, usually would be with my friend, but she had other plans that day, so she ended up going to another outlet and I had to attend the class at my usual outlet on my own.

I feel like the need for social validation whenever I go for this gym classes died after the not so great social experience I had on Wednesday. 

It made me realize that I don't really have any go-to friends in the class, and I should just accept that and not go to this classes and worry too much about that, I should readjust my approach and actually focus on the fitness aspect of the class rather than the social aspect of it. 

I feel like I have been overthinking this whole social aspect thing when I go to class, and become so hyperaware of how awkard and alone I feel during the sessions on most days that it has affected my ability to actually enjoy the clases for what they are.

I am there to be surrounded by people so I don't feel socially isolated, and I am there to stay fit, to be able to make friends there would be a bonus and that is a bonus that just hasn't happened yet. Most of the members there are friendly, but I haven't met anyone whom I am comfortable enough to really call a friend yet, except for my Secondary school friend, who doesn't really count because we were already friends before that. My go-to gym partner didn't attend the session today and honestly, after my Wednesday class, I have also come to realize that he is my go-to, but I am not his, so there is that revelation.

Anyways, the class was a bit iffy today, I grouped up with a bunch of new faces I have either seen very rarely or never seen before, the exercise program was a bit confusing and I just feel like I didn't get to really push myself much physically because I was just confused half the time. 

We had Lo Hei after the class as well, I really should have just left before the Lo Hei started because I found myself just awkwardly standing around on my own waiting for the whole thing to start, people were busy chatting with their own clique, I was told to help one particualr group take a group photo instead of being asked to join them for a photo, and then when the Lo Hei started, I did the Lo Hei, but didn't eat any of it, went to wash up in the toilet because someone got too excited and flung a bunch of it on my hand during the tossing, the whole experience was really really uncomfortable because I felt so out of place.

It reminded me of the first Dinner and Dance I had to attend back when I first joined ID4, granted it wasn't as painful but the vibes were similar.

I would usually try to find a familar face after class ends and then just say goodbye to them for whatever reason, but today I honestly just could not be bothered to, there were way too many people around and I just wanted to leave as quickly as possible, so I just walked away really quickly. Got myself a cup of coffee from TOMORO Coffee and then headed home.

Sigh. My social anxiety is really starting to ruin this whole gym experience for me.

Saturday well spent.

Spend the morning at a Fitstop class, had some concerns about going for weekend class alone for the first time (because I have always joined my friend for weekend classes) as the classes are always packed to the brim, but after experiecing an almost packed class during the the weekday session the past week, I think I kinda got used to it.

That being said, I still had a lot of anxiety about it the night before for some reason, but the class itself went really well and it's always invigoraating to start the day with excercise.

Met up with Zo later in the aftenoon for Matcha and catch up, we were supposed to meet around late morning, but there were some army related stuff that he had to deal with, so we only ended up meeting late afternoon instead.

We went to Rituals of Kora, this is literally my third time there, it's a good spot for Matcha but not exactly a spot I would keep going back for, so that was a bit excessive, but Zo had seen me posting about it on my Insta-stories and wanted to pay a visit, so I decided why not.

Got ourselves cookies and Matcha, duh. 

I had offered to pay for this meal because he had just came back from Korea/Japan not too long ago and brought back presents for me. 

The main item I had met up with him to collect was the Blue Elephant shades, this is the exact pair I had wanted to get back in Korea, but couldn't decide whether to or not until it was too late, and whilst he was in Korea, I noticed that he had posted about getting a pair of Blue Elephant for himself, so I shared with him about how I had missed my window to get it and congratulated him on getting his, to which he immediately offered to help me get the pair I had wanted, and so here we are.

I had wanted the shades, but I think a bigger reason I accepted his offer to help me get the shades was that it would give us another reason to meet up, not to rekindle any romance, but just purely to have a reason to meet up again as friends.

Anyways, Blue Elephant shades were what I was expecting, the rest were extra surprises, the biggest one being the small carton of Matcha he had gotten for me from Japan.

We stayed at the cafe for a bit, did some catch up there, but because the cafe was a bit crowded that day, I wasn't too comfortable sharing about my own Korea trip experience with him, so I kept telling him I will share more during dinner.

Popped by Orchard, did the usual perfume stops to smell a bunch of perfumes at Ngee Ann City, so the usual Diptyque and Byredo, walked around the mall a bit to look at random stuff before he suggested we go to a pasta bar for dinner.  

So we headed over to tipo Pasta Bar at Waterloo, 

We got ourselves pasta and a side to share, the side was fried Lasanga, it was a lot of pasta and it was quite filling, but it was a good meal.

This was where I started ranting to Zo about my Korea trip with Drew. 

It felt a bit weird talking to him about Drew because I pretty much started seeing Drew about 2 weeks after Zo called things off with me, but one thing about Zo is that he is a very good listener.

I shared what happened during the trip and, with everyone I have shared this experience with had a universal reaction of just disdain towards Drew, Zo was no different, he was shocked and he was upset for me me and I guess this is my way of  taking "revenge" against Drew, by painting him in that negative light to other people. To my own friends who will probably never meet him, and to people in the community who may potentially see his profile on Hinge, so that they will steer clear away from him.

Anyways, during my sharing, it got a bit uncomfortable because the table next to us had diners as well and I really didn't want complete strangers hearing stories about my dating life, especially because of the context of it all, it's weird, but it was a bit too late to switch seats, so I just tried to talk a bit softer, unfortunately, I think they were still able to listen in on my rant and I did not enjoy that, was kinda annoyed at how the staff didn' spread the diners out a bit more sparesely, there were literally seats around the resturant that they could have been seated at, but the waitress had to slap them right beside Zo and I. Sigh.

Zo and I stayed in the restaurant for a while because I was talking so much, I had to do a lot of setting up for the story to do in order to be able to help paint a fuller picture for him, and because he was such an engaging listener, he was also asking me a lot of follow up questions during my sharing and it just felt really therapeutic chatting with him, it's feels like I am talking to a therapist. 

After dinner, we walked over to Bugis for dessert, had originally wanted to go for Chinese Dessert, but the queue was long, so we opted for Ice Cream instead and landed at Tom's Palette.

This was when it became his turn to rant, but his was more about work, so I did my best to offer a listening ear.

We were only technically only allowed to dine in for 40 minutes, but I think we ended up staying there for a little over an hour, no one chased us out so we just overstayed our welcome and chatted as much as we wanted.

After this, we called it a night and made our way back home because it was already past 10pm, close to 11pm at that point. I really enjoyed meeting up with Zo, he reminded me how fufilling it had been when I was actively dating someone, whether it was him or Drew (during the early stage when he was still consistent).

I tried using Hinge again after our meet up, matched with some people, but I honestly don't think I am all that ready to get back into dating game because the moment I swiped my very first match, I started having all these expecations again that I know the other person will not be able to fufill, at least not at the start, and it is just so mentally exhausting to think about having to go through all the vetting again.

Random Updates and Photo Dump

Entering my fitness era, which is probably like 15 years late compared to peers my age who were doing it when they were in their 20s, but it's better than nothing.

Decided to join Fitstop because this is where one of my Secondary School friend frequents as well, she mainly comes for the evening classes and I prefer the morning classes, so we actually have only had 3 class together on the weekends ever since I joined a month ago. 

One of my friend replied to my story that I had posted about going to Fitstop, and said he would give me a maximum of 5 sessions before I call it quits, well I am about 13 - 14 classes in now, and I will say the classes have been great, but there are definitely moments where I feel like I am not pushing myself hard enough because I am not feeling as exhausted as everyone else in the class after the session, and almost everyone else in the class are a whole lot fitter than me.

My introverted self is definitely still struggling to initiate proper conversations with the regulars there, there are a few friendly ones whom I will usually Hi Bye before and after the class with, but I have yet to make any new friends there.

There has also been a steep increase in the number of gym-goers for my 7am  morning slot, what used to be a class of a maximum of maybe 4 - 6 people have now doubled because the main group from the first 6am morning slot have decided to come in at 7am. I get that the point of this gym classes is to have a lot of people to motivate one another, but honestly, I just feel a bit overwhelmed when I am surrounded with so many people that I am not close with thanks to my social anxiety.

Hopefully this can continue for the long run because I really do want to get into better shape, not too big, but enough definition to shed the skinny fat aesthetic that I have going on right now.

Random Photo Dump / Life Updates.

13th Dec.

Wanted to try out the newly opened Chick-Fil-a with a friend, but the queue was insane as anticipated, so I had already prepared a second option even before we met, I knew we were probably gonna end up visiting Sides, that also had a lot of hype when it first opened, but that hype has since died down.

Honestly decent for what it was without the need to queue, the chocolate shake was actually really good because they were using good quality dark chocolate ice cream.

After our meal, since we had no plans, I decided to look for a Matcha cafe nearby and realized Calligraphy was just a short walk away.

Had really wanted to give this place a try since I started getting into Matcha, so this was a very pleasant surprise.

Pistachio Matcha Latte and Apple Pie, it was not bad, but I would have probably preferred either a plain one or strawberry one a lot more. The cafe itself was surprisingly quiet for a weekend, so we just chilled there for a while and I remember making plans with my Sec School friend on Instagram to join her for a weekend Fitstop Class.

Headed to Suntec after this because it was also walking distance, found the Strawberry Puree in Donki, got a few packets, and then we walked so much afterwards within Suntec, I was honestly in a pretty bad mood during the latter half because the cafe we had wanted to take a break in was packed and I really really really needed a seat from how sore my legs were.

We did eventually just settled for a seat in the Foodcourt and then zoned out until we both had recouped enough energy to go back home.

Anyways, this was pretty much how that Saturday was spend.

20th Dec

Went for my very first weekend Fitstop class, it was the first time I attended a full class, so that was really overwhelming and I would have backed out if it hadn't been for the fact that I had booked this class with my Sec School friend.

She was definitely a lot fitter than I was, a bit of a bummer that we didn't really end up catching up much during the class because we were busy getting our asses kicked by the exercises, which I actually ended up enjoying. She did however told me that we could catch up again during the next Saturday class over brunch, so that is something to look forward to.

After the class, I went home to shower and then made my way over to Yen's place for a Christmas lunch with her husband. 

I had been hoping for a bigger group of people and she had planned to invite our ex-colleagues from the furniture store, just so everyone can have a catch up session with each other, but sadly, they were all busy, so she had no choice but to just invite me only.

Her home was quite Christmassy, she actually got a real Christmas Tree from IKEA, so there was this natural scent of whatever that tree was just wafting throughout the house, and then this is her little dog just chilling under the tree.

I wanted to have a "Christmas" looking meal, so I got a Christmas set from Kenny Rogers, it was way too much for 3 people, but I was glad I ordered this.

Anyway,s I also opened up to Yen about my Korea trip with Drew, and essentially came out to her while her husband was in the toilet taking a shower because I wasn't so sure if I wanted to come out to him as well. She offered a listening ear and I think like most friends whom I have come out to and shared what actually went on with Drew in Korea, she just told me to forget about him because he was never going to make a good partner.

It's so nice to be able to actually vent about Drew to friends and have them validate my feelings about him.

Sadly, Yen had a work appointment later that afternoon, so we only ended up only hanging out for 2 hours before I had to leave.

21st Dec

Met up with someone I had matched with on Hinge, we had matched many months ago around the same time I had matched with Drew, but this isn't a date, I met up with him purely as a friend, so there were zero expectations.

I visited Rituals of Korra again, he had reached out after he saw me post about my last trip there and asked when I could go with him, so here we were.  Total damage was $30, which is to be expected when it comes to having Matcha at a nice cafe.

We had a meal at the nearby Hawker afterwards and had a good chat about random topics we could think of, it didn't feel too awkward, which was great. I think because I came into this meet up with no expectation of meeting a potential partner, the whole expereince just didn't feel as initmatidating.

After the meal, we dropped by Elijah Pie. I have tried their Pisatchio Pie before and I really liked it, and since it was literally just beside the Hawker Centre we were at, we popped by, but not to have dessert there since he had another meeting with a bunch of friends and I had a family Christmas dinner to attend to that evening.

I got myself a full slice of their Ceral Milk Pie and also a box of 9 mini tarts for the Family Chrismas Dinner later that evening at my brother's place.

The dog ended up climbing on the table during dinner and attempted to eat the only chocolate tart that was left in that box of 9 minis I had gotten.  Also one tart is missing because my Mum helped herself to a piece at the start of the dinner.

24 Dec and 25th Dec

I had wanted to book a Fitstop class on the 24th Dec, but they only had 2 morning classes that I couldn't attend due to work, so I didn't end up booking any class in advance.

Then my boss announced on 23rd Dec that Christmas Eve will be an off day for us as well, so when I woke up that day, I was contemplating whether to go for a session or not and ultimately decided to make a booking for it literally an hour before the class started.

I really had nothing else planned the entire day, if I didn't attend the class, I would just be home doing fuck all, so it was so much better to at least do something productive that day.

I couldn't join the first class because it was packed, and the first class was where all the familiar faces were, so I didn't really enjoy this class very much in the end because I just didn't enjoy the company of the particular group of people in the second group that day. That being said, I didn't regret going for the class because of the endorphins it gave me when the class ended.

Christmas day had nothing on as well, and the gym had no lessons that day, so I pretty much just stayed at home and played Wuthering Waves or doomscrolled on TikTok. I avoided Instagram as much as I could because a part of me knew if I started seeing people's stories of them having their Christmas parties, I will get a huge sense of FOMO.

27th Dec

Joined my Secondary School friend for our 2nd Fitstop session together.

It's actually nice to go for the session knowing I have a friend whom I can talk to when I reach, my main struggle visiting the gym now is going in and not actually having that "go-to" buddy for me to talk to and team up with.

After our session together, we went for brunch at the nearby Hawker Centre and it's just nice to chat and catch up with one another. This was definitely one of the better classes I had just because I am in the company of an old friend. It made up for the not so great session on Christmas Eve.