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 disclaimer [insert disclaimer] `icouldwaitforever_its worth it;  myPROFILE: talz* female sixteEn tms likes: reading. writing. travelling. music. a certain someone =p. myWISHLIST: insert wishiies((: its over its over its over. secondary school. and its over. ` 11:28 PM Tuesday, August 16, 2005 Saying is easy, Feeling is natural, But darn, doing is something else altogether. But i'm not gonna give up. Yes, my friends, motivation. A third of the motivational camp has swept past our very eyes, and through less than twenty-four hours, I have both laughed till I've damaged my throat and wept with every shread of sentiment I've got. I think I'm more of those easily manupilated or more 'feeling' people (whatever makes you happy), and motivational speeches generally work for me. Yet, I honestly, have never in my life chanced upon such a camp. Ever. No, I'm not an advertising campaign. I'm just an honest person. If you have a problem with it, go n kill urself (after fining me 5cents). And yet, the complete irony, is that I am now spending time, updating my useless little blog when I should be studying. But the thing is, I have so much on my mind now, and stuff which I really want to think about. Motivational camps are basically (no, i am not implying that i am in any way simplifying the term, and don't presume to do so) brain-washing sessions. Do you realize that? Yep, and so I have a lot of things on my mind. things that I need to think about. things that I have unconsiously 'forgotten' and things that I'm starting to battle my self conciousness and typical laziness to do. Because brain-washing session as it is, there is some pretty substantial food for thought in all that spice of jokes and sentiment. So yes, I'm all corny and everything. All the 'stupid, little sentimental girl'. But hey, tts just me. we all under our honorable red and white wavering piece of cloth adorned with a few cute stars and probably a moon, as far as i recall, we all have this right which our government arrests us for using (without prior permission) anyway. Its called 'freedom of speech', right? ` 11:18 PM Wednesday, June 08, 2005  my current desktop. i'm really quite obsessed ya? ` 11:37 PM i'm so tired. its the holiday and i'm still slugging my fat old self to school everyday of the week. some holiday. well at least I get to socialize and read I guess. and play piano. omg. I just forgot I had to do theory!! ahh crap. I've been going waay too obsessed abt cute people lately. they're even on my desktop!! its nuts la. but i dun really care. s'long as I still can study. it provides free entertainment and is an instant sleepiness/boredom remedy. ok dead tired. nites everyone!! happy holidays. try to have it as pleasing as possible la.. ` 11:22 PM Tuesday, May 31, 2005 a midsummer's night blog -- the sequel Just updated on the class blog. still not interested in turning off that darn hi-fi and crawling into bed. so much has happened, it tires me just to recount it. so spare my aching head the extra work and juust let me talk abt now. its 1+ in the morning. I don't have much to write. so I'll just write a poem. enjoy. or puke. tell me which one u did after reading it. an engulfing wave a tangy bloom castles in the sand the heavens spin the stars tease while light and dark frolic the waves shy the blooms rust footprints in the sand the giggles tickle the dews wash while light and dark frolic uplifting depressing clocks only work clockwise Dun ask me what this is abt. I think it just spoils the whole poem. if u think its good enough, it should stick in ur head. and u'll understand it sometime. if its not good enough, well, lets just say I've failed. It is rather amibiguous I guess. but ambiguous is good. only not for exams. Anyway. I should really get to bed. whether I like it or not. nites. or mornin'. whatever. ` 1:15 AM Saturday, April 16, 2005 i'm so sleepy. My mum came home on wednesday, and brought with her lots of good food. oh no, there goes my diet again. haha. she bought these really nice shoes. but they're so puny, I doubt I can wear them. It's not fair for ppl with big feet! haha. 4R is going crazy. It started since we moved to the MI room. Everyone's like close and stuff now. haha. laugh together, crap together. I realized this aftnoon that our class is pretty great. everyones ok with everyone else (almost, except for one person. I shall not waste time saying the obvious). In sec 3, everyone was so quiet. keeping to themselves, listening in class, sleeping in class. actually now, I think more ppl are listening in class with o levels round the corner. but its just tt ppl are starting to make more smartass comments and more ppl are laughing in class. Some people just say the right things and some just cant stop saying the wrong things. Anyway, thurs was boeing boeing. class outing thing. we watched the play at victoria theater. It was fun! I think all of us finally realized how cool going out as a class can be. During homework time, everyone was hyper! choosing delifrance vouchers and talking abt our attire for the night. haha. at home, everyone was like omg! dress up. haha, not tt it matters, but I wore a white shirt with pink ribbon trimming and a black skirt. yup. contacts too. anyway, met up with valerie and people. everyone looked great! unfortunately, valerie sprained her ankle. and got piggybacked by song wei. haha. chuan li grew a few inches taller with all tt standing hair. we also made a few discoveries abt certain people in class and their emotional inclinations. haha. yup. chuan li got quite upset with emily and I cuz we werent helping valerie. but then like. everyone was helping. and we seriously thought tt going first to tell kc tan to wait for valerie and co. would be better. so yea, valerie, if we seemed uncaring, i'm sorry. just make sure ur ankle gets well! The show was super funny. It turned out to be alot better than I expected, with its storyline being so toot. ok. short summary. its abt this guy who has 3 air stewardess fiances, none of them which he intend to marry. yup. toot. but then its so funny I think I was laughing throught the better half of the play. very unglam, no doubt. haha. After the play everyone was estatic. so was kc tan. he smiled! for the 3rd time in 2 yrs!! well. its nice to know he smiled more often than he got pissed. we were heading to lau pa sat for supper, and sending valerie off. taking so many pictures with the fullerton in the background. super fun la. and like this group of businessmen started helping us take pictures and took some pics with us. cool la. Class spirit was super strong. I liked it. in the end, no one went to lau pa sat. haha. met one of the cast at the mrt station. and everyone was crowding arnd getting an autograph. omg, Siti! u rock!! haha. "It is not easy!" haha. now I'm so sleepy, I'm seriously gonna doze off any moment. nitez. ` 12:45 AM Tuesday, April 12, 2005 aiyaa. long time no blog. but tts been bcuz its been a long. turbulent time for me la. and normally turbulent times aren't for public ears. yup. so I wont go there. lets talk abt smth less serious. I have become so gossipy. gossip gossip. so auntie! haha then according to emily, its only gossip abt 4 specific people (2 couples) in class la. but still. we are getting quite busybody. I love the MI room!! AIRCON!! I never want to move out. except the tables are really a tad small. Oh no! I just rmbred I left the strawberry candy frm florence in my pencil box. better go take it out before it melts and destroys my stationery ya? ewww. Talking about stationery. Its so expensive! I went to popular today to get my mother's day present. (she's studying psychology now, cool huh) Anyway, yea. I got her a pink glittery pen, 2 highlighters, and one file. then I needed fool scap and my dear brother busted his pen. so it added up to $8.75!! shocked* like $10 flew away. =( yea. yea. yea. aiya. duno what to talk abt. ok. start new paragraph- ok. I lengthened it by a line! watever la. die man. common test in like 15 days. and I havent studied! ahhhhhhh. ok. next topic. I miss the sfw ppl. ok next topic. I hate wet hair. but then I hate hair dryers too. ok next. ummm. tuition is expensive. umm. I'm sorry valerie! we're like invading ur locker. hmm. =p aiyaa. do u always have to be this nice? haha. talking abt lockers. they STILL havent notified me abt lockers. they just conveniently FORGOT. businessmen these days. tsk tsk. bad attitude to customers. anyway. ok. I just thought of a long topic. me and my embarrassing moments. last friday I was looking forward to watching this free piano recital at the esplande. florence, emily, valerie they all werent free la. so I went alone. (sad ya?) no la. actually quite fun. can walk at ur own pace, pretend ur working. glam glam. anyway. I decided to eat subway cuz my friend told me their stuff is fresh. so I saw this sandwich. honey mustard ham. sounds nice ya? anyway, I ordered it. and the girl. she asked me "do u want pepper?" and without waiting for my answer, she started adding. like ==" "uh. a little!" but too late. ya. so bcuz I was feeling kiam, I decided to forgo the fries and drink to save money. Because I was alone, I was sms my friend and eating. after smsing, there was nothing to think abt anymore, and suddenly, I realized tt the sandwich was so freaking hot! den I started crying la. the girl in front of me was whispering to her bf, "she broke up is it?" super embarrassing. and nothing to extinguish the spiciness. so I dumped the sandwich and tried to walk as fast and glamly as my high heels could take me to citilink to buy $1 ice creams (saving money la), crying half the way. then all the promoters I passed by b4 saw me crying la. den some guys gave me this funny look. embarrassing alright? Finally, I got to the icecream stall. and tried to pay the guy in coins. unfortunately, my coin scattered all over the floor. and I was wearing my mini skirt. so I had to squat to pick one coin at a time while I was balancing a my wallet and the ice cream cone in the other. I think the guy got a lil pissed la. yea. so embarrassing ya? anyway, in the end also didnt get to watch the concert. the queue was all the way frm the recital studio till haagendaz there la. crazy. so, disappointed, I went to the library, and listened to this mozart piano CD instead. which is quite good. but I couldnt find it at HMV afterward. anyway. when I wanted to leave the library, I couldnt eject the CD! press press press. then I saw the library auntie walk past. Chasing after her, I just dumped the head phone on the counter and ran after her. unfortunately, my chair swivelled and the headphones slipped off. and CRASHEd to the floor. it definately caught her attn tho. along with a lot of other ppl in the library. the worst is in the end, I only had to hold the eject button a little longer. ==" yea. embarrassing. but quite fun. getting all the wrong attn. aiyo. ok. do hw le. ` 6:58 PM Saturday, March 05, 2005 ok. gonna be honest here. if i had blogged 24hrs earlier, this entry would have contained a sincere letter to my dear band leaders and nothing else. but since then, well, at least they had tried planning smth for us today. and for tt, i am somewhat pacified, i guess. i guess most people could look at us perf band fluties and just despise us for our attitude and tears. i'll be honest, i cannot guarantee tt if i were in syf band and looked back on those red eyed, black faced band mates, i'd not feel distaste. but then again. things are always the clearest and sharpest when it comes thru the eyes of a victim. maybe it is hard to understand. maybe it is hard to find something to do with us. but i can surely say that never have I felt more alone in our crowded band room. never have I felt more like a loser in front of the gold distinction medal delicately stored in the cupboard. never have I brushed my suckiness off, stalling the the hard work to another day. yes. u must be thinking I'm so longwinded. i repeat this everytime i blog. when will i ever stop all this self pity? its irritating. so it is. and by all means, hate me. i feel old. i have spent a lot of time trying to be someone no one can critisise. someone no one can look at and say "oh, she's a bitch". whether i was successful or not, its for u to judge. but lately, its been trying. its hard to watch ur behavior when u have ur feelings to deal with too. its hard to stop urself frm not giving a shit. the o levels. everyone has a diff horror story to relate. ur a math grades suck cuz of carelessness. tell me how to save my sanity. ` 9:44 PM  myLINKS: florence marcus pinyi jessica valerie mish lynn eugene ben/wong brian amy unforgettableMOMENTS: 12/01/2003 - 01/01/2004 01/01/2004 - 02/01/2004 02/01/2004 - 03/01/2004 03/01/2004 - 04/01/2004 04/01/2004 - 05/01/2004 05/01/2004 - 06/01/2004 06/01/2004 - 07/01/2004 11/01/2004 - 12/01/2004 12/01/2004 - 01/01/2005 01/01/2005 - 02/01/2005 02/01/2005 - 03/01/2005 03/01/2005 - 04/01/2005 04/01/2005 - 05/01/2005 05/01/2005 - 06/01/2005 06/01/2005 - 07/01/2005 08/01/2005 - 09/01/2005 11/01/2005 - 12/01/2005 templateCREDITS: Icon Blogger Blogskins Psdelightful Template by `myriadstars;* [insert tagboard here] PREFERRED SETTINGS: Width: 200 ; Height: 250 | ||
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