Glasses, Grasses, and Grandpa

We live in a beautiful part of the country.

I have to remind myself of this whenever I start missing the ocean.

We needed an activity that could be done by four generations so we went up to Silver Lake and it was absolutely gorgeous. We started out at 96 degrees and by the time we got there, it was 76. Perfect. (Faith is at Girl's Camp)
(My Grandparents with Uncle Roger and Aunt Jeanette)
(The cutest boy there ever was)
We walked around the lake and saw kids fishing. One boy caught one while we were standing by him and he let the kids look and touch if they wanted. Then he showed us how to unhook it.
The kids climbed up the rocks.

Grace is showing off the tree pose she learned on the wii fit.

My dad, a really fun grandpa, saved the day by asking Hope and Eli to "do what I do." They went through the last part of the hike touching flowers, climbing on rocks, and twisting and turning their way through.


It was a glorious day not even ruined by the fact that Eli jumped on my lap while I was holding my favorite sunglasses. Snap!

Oh Well.
When I first moved here, two years ago, I "borrowed" them out of a drawer at my parents house. I later learned that they weren't just a five dollar pair. But my dad still let me have them and witnessed their breaking. Without even hesitating he offered me another pair and said, "These are my second favorite." (Like I had just broken his first favorite.) What a great dad!

Prayer Rock

My uncle and aunt are visiting. They used to live close by us in California. They brought me these. (If you don't know how happy this makes me, you can click here.)

My Grandpa and Grandma are also visiting. They brought my brother his inheritance. Ever since he was a little boy, he has wanted just one thing. My grandpa had a piece of petrified wood that was the living room centerpiece. It was the place that we all gathered for family prayers. We all have many memories of going to Grandpa and Grandma's and praying around the log or using it as a footrest or just sitting around it and talking.
My brother asked for the log and since grandpa hadn't heard that anyone else wanted it, he agreed to bring it to him. Since Mark is living in an apartment a few stories up and the log is heavy, everyone agreed that I could house it until Mark gets a house. The log is perfect in this spot in my house. (We'll see if I ever allow Mark to take it:).

With Grandpa's youngest child, Uncle Roger visiting, everybody was a little worried that he would be upset that Mark got the log. When Roger first saw the log in my house in the perfect spot. His response???

"I thought Mark was getting the log."

An Artist in the Making

I love that summer is low key enough to allow the kids to do things they love. Grace was spotted sketching the flowers in the front yard.




She also created rooms for her Webkinz. Not virtual rooms but real, made from a shoebox rooms.




She checks out sketching books from the library. She is always doodling, coloring or drawing.
It's really great when they find something to be passionate about.

Life is like the Ropes Course

It has been several years since I have done the ropes course at our favorite family reunion spot, Aspen Grove. I used excuses of pregnancy, just given birth, or too out of shape. But let's face it, I was scared. I don't like doing certain things. I like to whine and have excuses for things that are too hard.
This year I really wanted to do it. I had no good excuse not to and I realized that there are harder things in life than the ropes course.
I hesitate showing the "behind" shots but it's proof. First you have to climb the log. (The foot-holes are small and the log is swinging a little bit and it's slippery. Oops sorry. There I go whining again.)




When I got to the wall climbing part, I realized that I would have to make a leap of faith because the foot-holes were a little too far apart to just climb up. This is where I became very grateful for "that guy." You know the one standing at the bottom holding the ropes. I knew he was not going to let me fall. When I made the leap, he pulled tight. I could feel him helping me just enough that I could do it.

I knew I could do it.

I realized then that it was like this life journey that we are on. Life is hard. There are many times when we don't think we can make it to the next step but God is there pulling tight on the ropes. He lets us work hard enough that it is still our life but he lifts us up when it's too hard to go on. I know this is true. I know He will never let us fall.

With God's help, I can do hard things.

A little bit of Hope

This is where I caught Hope. She's looking at the book Camille made for us.

Hope is the child I worry about most. She doesn't talk about Joy very often. She gets upset whenever I am crying or even look like I am about to cry. So it was a relief to see her looking at the book and crying. I took her in my arms and I said, "What do you miss about Joy?" We looked at the book together and we cried and laughed.

Welcome to The Club

A few months ago, I was at a Stake R. S. Women's Conference. It was one of those days when the tears flow. The messages were uplifting and I was really glad I was there. I was introduced to a few people who I didn't know, but they had heard about me. "Here's the person I was telling you about that lost her daughter." I was getting a little tired of being the one whose daughter died.
I went into my last class and the teacher, standing at the door, said, "Hi. What's your name?" After I said my name she said, "Oh, now, how do I know you?" I was a little exasperated and I blurted out, "My daughter died in January. That's how everybody knows me."
Her eyes immediately filled with tears and she put her arms around me and she said, "Welcome to the club. It's been 24 years since my little girl died." (Turns out she didn't know that and knows me because of another thing.)

The club.
It's sort of an elite group. The membership price is far more than anyone wants to pay. More than you think you can bear except somehow you pay it. The blessings and miracles are plentiful. The sorrow and tears overflowing.

I've met a few other people in the club. I find comfort in these sisters of mine. We share a bond like no other.
Lucy's mom wrote "I think I'm starting to understand better what the scriptures mean when they say "being alive in Christ". I want to be alive in Christ...and in Lucy. With their presence we can not only feel "normal" again, but like we're truly living. Alive. Loving. Serving. Joyous. Whole."
Molly reminds me that I am so very lucky to have four other kids to focus on and continue loving. She shared a quote from Neal A. Maxwell. "A cavity dug from sorrow becomes a receptacle for joy." (Did you know that I LOVE quotes that have joy in them?)
Camille's mom taught me to, "Force yourself to do something Physical (workout), Spiritual (pray, ponder and study scriptures), Mental (write or read some or exercise your brain), and Social (serve others or just get out and be with people) EVERYDAY. It is what the Savior did and if you do it everyday it will make you happier. It is the only way I know to claw out of the pit of sorrow."
Does Wii Fit count? (I'm getting pretty good at the yoga poses.:)

I can hardly believe that we just passed the six month mark. And as hard as it is to be in the club, it is wonderful to have a support group of loving people who know how it is.

One final thought from Elder Maxwell, "Meanwhile, there are no separate paths back to that heavenly home. Just one straight and narrow way, at the end of which, though we arrive trailing tears, we shall at once be “drenched in joy.”

I am counting on that!

Idol Worship

First of all, I will admit to swooning over a kid that is half my age and young enough to be my offspring.
He really is THAT GOOD.
His voice fills my soul and the entire arena and he is so dang cute and very humble.




He sang "When You Say You Love Me" better than Josh Groban. (For just a taste of what it was like to be there you can click on Melanee's blog and play the second video down.)

All of the idol contestants were really good and it was great to see and hear them in person.
Here is my take on everybody.

Sidenote: Don't you think it should have started with a group number? I sort of missed that.
Everybody got to sing 3 songs. (Archie sang 4 and Cook sang 5)
#10: Chikezie
He was much better in person than on the show but I was never really a fan. He had tons of energy and started off the show with a bang.
#9: Ramiele
As Simon would say: Forgettable (Loved her purple fingernails though.)
#8: Michael Johns
So ruggedly handsome and very good.

#7: Carly
I really liked her voice on the show but at the concert I really felt that she was screaming.
#6: Kristy Lee Cook

Surprisingly, she was fantastic. I could have listened to her longer. I think she has developed into a confident performer no longer ruled by Simon's blunt put-downs.
#5: Brooke White

She was darling. I love her voice and her sweet spirit. She was barefoot and the only modest girl in the bunch. Fabulous!
#4: Jason Castro
Sorry, still not a fan. He is cute, though.
#3: Syesha

Vocally, she is wonderful. She surprised me a little with her powerhouse voice. It was really good.
I just could not get over her dress. Come on. I really did not want to see her cleavage.
#2: Shall I say it again?
He is unbelievably talented and it was sweet that he was so touched by the support of so many adoring fans.
#1: David Cook


He was also fantastic and very handsome. Loved his songs and his voice.

I'm so excited for next year already!

Family Pictures minus one

It was one of those days that I'm surprised I made it through. Well, sort of made it through. I could not stop crying and I was really trying to fake it. We did back-to-back reunions this year and at both of them we did family pictures.
I wanted to stop the show. "Wait. One of mine is missing."
Here are all my parents grandkids. Except for Joy.
I still see Joy in their faces. I am so glad that they can smile and laugh and continue to live. Faith is wearing her Joy necklace. It seems that I'm not the only one that was missing her this day.

The photographer grouped us into individual families and seated us first and then said, "Is this all of your children?" Um, Nope. Fresh tears. I'm totally wiping my nose. (The professional pictures turned out much better. I'm just posting random shots from my camera.)

The extended Gardner clan. 105 people. Each generation in a different color.

Then we did it again at our Weaver reunion.

I can totally see Joy with her angel wings sitting in the tree with them.

I'm so grateful for eternal families. Even though she's missing in the picture, she is in our family forever.

Twinners

While we were shopping, Eli really, really wanted this shirt. He wanted to match his dad. How cute is that?

Finding Joy

A sweet friend sent me a card that included this message from a Mormon Tabernacle Choir Broadcast in February:



Finding Joy
Delivered By: Lloyd D. Newell
One of the most popular courses taught at Harvard University is a class called “Positive Psychology.” In essence, the professor teaches how to find joy in living. One semester more than 800 students enrolled. What does it say about our society that we must teach “finding joy” at the highest levels of academia?

Many myths and misconceptions swirl about how and where to find joy. For so many, it is elusive. Some think that joy comes from money or material possessions, so they conclude that adding more of them will surely bring increased joy. Or we may think we can only have joy if our relationships are always stable and our careers are always successful.

But real joy does not depend on our social status or our bank account, and it can even be found in times of turmoil and disappointment. Joy springs from our attitude and outlook. It comes from simple gestures, like making time for family members or friends, clearing up a misunderstanding, expressing gratitude for the efforts of others, celebrating their successes, or taking time to listen to their worries.

This kind of joy is available not only during times of peace, when all is going well, but also when we face challenges, heartache, or pain. In fact, that’s when joy does its greatest service—it brings balance and peace to the harshness and stresses of everyday living. It lifts our sights and settles our souls.

Ask yourself where you find joy, and then diligently look for it there. If, at the end of the day, we remember and prize each moment of real joy, we will learn for ourselves the truth of what the Psalmist promised: “Weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning.”

G. N. O.

I was the designated chaperone for these cute girls to attend Stadium of Fire.

I heard comments such as, "I'm so excited, I'm gonna pee my pants."
And, "We're not gonna talk all day so we have our full voice for screaming!"

I made two mistakes. I told Grace to wear her new Hannah Montana shoes. Walking in new shoes=Blisters. Sorry Grace.
And we tried to sneak in candy which had to be thrown away. (That's okay. Frozen lemonades and kettle corn made it all better.)

Glen Beck was great. He got emotional when he talked about what the colors red, white and blue mean. He talked about our troops and their sacrifice for our freedoms.

The Blue Man Group was good. I loved how they asked us to do rock concert poses.Of course, the reason we were there. Good ole' Miley.
And she WAS good. I was impressed. A lot of rocker head banging though. She sang a bunch of songs off her new unreleased album so nobody knew them. The songs the girls did know had them up and singing and dancing. Hope could not get over the fact that she was wearing a tank top.


The fireworks were spectacular, despite getting ash all over us and being so loud that Faith went out and purchased Hope some earplugs. ( With her own money-A very thoughtful gesture.)
The girls all had their ears plugged during the fireworks.

She ended with "I miss you" and she dedicated it to those families who have someone serving in the military. That song has a different meaning for us. The girls and mom had a great time and I love it when the kids say, "You're the best mom ever."
Here's the Deseret News article about the concert.