We will try once again :)

Our second In Vitro Fertilization procedure didn't work. The same thing happened to me as the first one did. About a week after the transfer of the two eggs, I had a blood test for hormone levels and then one a few days later for HCG (pregnancy) levels. My numbers were high just like the first round. They told me that it is around a 5% chance to have high numbers your first test and then have low numbers in your second test, especially twice. But...I was in that small percentage.

After I had my first test with my good news we went with Ty's family up to stay in a cabin up North. I was bummed that I couldn't ride go-carts up there and started realizing all of the things you can't do when you are pregnant so I told Tyler I think we should go to Disney Land if things don't work out so I can ride some roller coasters. Well that next week they took the second blood test and it had dropped. When the patient coordinator called me, she started asking about my day and what was going on trying to avoid telling me the inevitable. I told her to just tell me and she said she didn't want to. I was at work which was good because I had to suck it up and not cry.


I didn't want to have my hopes so high this time around, but I really did. I was prepared mentally for bad news though, just in case. Tyler wasn't as prepared and he took it a little harder than I did. The week we were told was pretty emotionally hard for us. It was harder for me to see how sad my husband was feeling than for my own feelings. Towards the end of the week Tyler really felt inspired that for whatever reason we are being blessed right now to not have a baby. Blessed? I know. sounds funny. But we look at it that way and one day we will find out why these things took a while. I look back on a job I wanted to take when we moved to Arizona and how I wanted it so bad and couldn't understand why things happened the way they did when I didn't get that job. I now know and I am so glad Heavenly Father knows all and helps us to be our happiest. We just have to trust in Him and in our Savior. I am feeling optimistic about our next transfer. :)

We have two more grade "B" eggs and are trying again. Luckily we found out that this procedure will be only around $4,000 instead of $11,000. If these ones don't take we will probably wait a while to save up again. My doctor told me that he wanted to do something different this time. He tested me for many clotting issues and I was negative for all of them. He doesn't know of anything that is causing the embryo to stop growing. Apparently it tries to attach to my uterus and then it just doesn't stay. He says that he still wants to try something different so he is going to put me on Heparin shots in my stomach. This may help more blood to get to the embryo so it will continue to grow when it attaches. Getting a heparin shot in my stomach and giving myself a shot were my biggest fears of these procedures. It makes me cry thinking about it. I will get big bruises on my stomach from heparin because it is a blood thinner. I feel like I am having to face my fears and I sure hope there is not some naturalpathic way to get pregnant by using spiders because I don't think I could conquer that fear. :)

Ty and I went to Disneyland last week like we said we would if things didn't work out. It was really fun :) I start my Lupron shots on Sunday. If anyone wants to give me a shot this round, let me know (because Tyler's sick of it) :)