Saturday, September 27, 2008
I WANT TO WATCH F1 LIVE AND UPFRONT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :(((((
Monday, August 18, 2008
was saying bout being busy..sometimes really feel so stuffed up at home that even thou i'm damn tired and shagged and sick i still wanna be out then home...just feel better when ever i have my darling w me... :( that's a bad thing in some ways la...i mean it's my hse and my home anyway....but...it's just....i feel
that was a sudden big rain....and it's giving me a bad feeling again....mm...
anyway, being alone at home is really lonely for my mum...and i think bout her i really pity her....really really feel very sad for her.....and i don't even wanna be home...that's even worst...sometimes i'm scared i will get the same treatment too when i have my own kids...you know? like 'bao ink'...so, i really don't know...sometimes i feel i wanna quickly move out so that i don't have to stay at home..
it's the environment...and the feel of loneliness in this household...i really wish my mum would just go out more often and don't take so much care of this house...but she's restricted by her movements at days...or i wish that she'll just go overseas like so back msia and find her sister...but the dogs..that's the reason she's always giving that she can't go back...the loneliness can actually make a person cry just by sitting there in the hse...
i personally don't like the feeling of being lonely...i mean yes, you'll want to have some time to yourself, but this kind of lonely is just horrible....i see it in other people's lifes and i wish i won't have go thru life like that too....
last week was project proj and more project...oh man...darling qing's so sweet,ahaha..she's so touched by the hot choc that she blogged about it...so surprised..hee...and i guess she wanted to show her gratitude back by getting me a belt!!..i love it!!..thanks so much too babe!!...silly silly girl...hahaa..big big hugsss!!**
qing babe* : i think we gotta stop our impulse buying..ahaha...we're going to eat grass soon...or maybe just me..lol!
sorry i'm not a person who thank pple well, just found out.. sometimes pple felt very insincere by my thanks...so, sorry if any of you ever felt this way...but i'm really very thankful!!:)
anyway, sat was a really tiring and busy one...first we had to wait for the car, then rush down to collect the imac then rush home edit music, then send me down to GWC to do proj, then rush home, go back for show...and another show at night...qing also followed us for the later show...she was a really really great help!!! haha...i mean honestly,seriously...
it was also the first time dear performed his dove act...his and e doves' virgin act!!!!..ahahaha..they were so terrified but so cute!...and i was so scared...cause i had to "catch" them and go one big round to put them back in their cage...scared that they would fly away!...i must say overall it was a great show!!...of course, thanks to his 2 lovely assistants..ahahaa..
aft e show we sent the doves home and they we headed to e airport to eat dinner (assistants are very poor thing..gotta starve tgt w e magician..hai....hahahahaa)..and also to drop qing off to meet her darling who was coming back...hee..
sunday sunday..nothing much actually..just went to work in e aftnn...then night went for dinner cum supper and home!~...hee..
thanks for staying over dear!!!...it was damnnnnnnnnnnnn sweet of you..hee muacks* :)
Monday, August 11, 2008
my dogs keep on fighting and barking tonight....i wonder why...is it a bad sign?...i keep on having this bad feeling...mmm....i hope nothing horrible or bad happens...i mean *touch wood touch wood* *choi choi*...
anyway i had another perculiar dream...i dreamt that my mum(i shld think was my mum) & myself was in this place like a hotel...then suddenly i had this feeling that the building was going to collasped so i asked my mum quickly get out of something like a swimming pool and run out of the place...just in time the building collasped...then not long we went bad inside the rables to help dig/find and bring the injured pple out....but the thing is this....
if a building collasped..pple are trapped under bricks and concrete right?..so we had to try and carry those bricks and dig and find for survivors....but instead of those concrete and rables, we were digging through piles & piles of clothes to look for pple...those injured pple were trapped under piles and piles of clothes!!..and we were just take chunks and chunks of clothes and throwing them aside to find for pple beneath...
i don'tknow this dream suppose to be funny or is a bad sign....
anyway, qing & i went to check out our project's shop...then of course after that we went to walk walk ard..ahaha..qing bought a top and a dress that i chose!! hee..pretty pretty lil' babe!..and i bought a smthg frm women'secret..obviously e sales section..ahaha...if i was working i'll go for the 'new collection' section.. :p
i always like to head to the sales section and if i can find smthg my size and it's cheap..i'm damn happy!!...i think it's a cheap thrill & definitely a sense of satisfaction...ahaha..happy w my 1 buy today..and i hope i'll stop buying!!!!!
omg...have no idea how much things i've been buying...i must save up for my pilates classes!!!!... it cost a bomb to attend these classes...so help me!!!when u see me buying tell me that i nd to save money for more important things!!!help me help me!!....
Thursday, August 07, 2008
ohhhh it's exactly a month since i blogged..ahahaa...i always like to have a gap of a month i realised...anyway, some updates..
i've been having dreams recently and it's all quite...how to say..erm...scary? bad omen?...oh well...
night night night before i dreamt of something like an earthquake, then like a small baby or something was left on the edge of the building aft the earthquake then we tried to catch it but the other building that the baby was on keep on moving left to right right to left like those erm 'bu dao wong' u know? yea....
then last last night i dreamt of this person forgot was leg or arm was chopped off....
last night i dreamt of something too...but i forgot what...im filled with bad dreams eh....
why cant i just don't dream or have sweet dreams or better dreams...oh man...
ok, enough of that...see if i got any pics to post up...
that's me at the garden festival...look so retarded...
that's me and shiying...
yoko when she came to wake me up...
below is e irritated jeremy tan...
awwwww...i love this photo so much...cause my nephew's so cute!!!!! and he looks so stunned..
my other nephew...the older brother...
finally found a picture of jeremy's birds...they're so cute yet so dumb!...ahahaha...
Monday, July 07, 2008
i think i should be posting bout my trip now..having rest enough..but i shall let pictures do the talking..ok, blogger is having problems...so i shall upload until this....
this is basically the end of our trip, the last night in bangkok we went to RCA to "club"...i wouldn't exactly say clubbing cause it was really a last min thing and dear brought me to see the place..it was a nice experience, we've nv been to clubs just the 2 of us alone bfore...but it was fun!!!! hahaha...we chose a club called '808' which had a electrico event w only smirnoff drinks to serve..the music was damn good!!!!i don't know how to compare it but it's really damn good electrico music...so pple that loves phuture music will hate this place..ahahaha...and surprisingly there was quite a no of girls that love this music there and you see them dancing and jumping ard..i meant literally jumping!!...
i've nv seen this packing before..one is smirnoff black ice and smirnoff ice..
the nxt 3 photos is our 3rd day in krabi activity, we went kayaking and elephant trekking..
we were kayaking in the open sea...well, bfore that we had to kayak to this mangrove forest and spend like almost an hour or so inside going thru the mangrove..it's damn fun!!!!but i dislike the monkeys, although i gotta admit they are quite cute and smart..
our 2nd day activity was to visit the 4/5 islands of phi phi and go snorkelling!!!!!!! 1st time in my life...i really loveeeee the water there, it's so damnnnn clear and beautiful!!!!!!!!! i can't emphasize enough....and snorkelling was fun fun fun!!! except for the salt water and life jacket...
the place is just beautiful!!!!!!
we got picked up by a driver at phuket to drive us to our hotel in krabi which took like 2 hrs ++...and see, the road for that 2 hrs just keeps on going and it's the road that nv ends and it's the road that never ends................
our erm...breakfast before flying to phuket...hehe...all because i tot inside got kopitiam, but got cheated, it was closed down so we had to tahan w maggi mee :(
the place is just beautiful!!!!!!
we got picked up by a driver at phuket to drive us to our hotel in krabi which took like 2 hrs ++...and see, the road for that 2 hrs just keeps on going and it's the road that nv ends and it's the road that never ends................
our erm...breakfast before flying to phuket...hehe...all because i tot inside got kopitiam, but got cheated, it was closed down so we had to tahan w maggi mee :(
well, overall the trip was a damn good one, enjoyed myself and i love the company!! :) esp w my dearest w me...hee...i will try and upload more photos e nxt post..but for more details on the trip, pls read jeremy tan's blog - http://web.mac.com/jeremy_tan/
and while u're at it, leave a comment too, to make him happy...ahahaha...his fetish w blogging now, and he updates practically everyday...
i miss the clear watersssssssss........and everything else that came w this trip...looking forward to another one like that soon!!!
so now, i gotta get back to reality....ohh man....
Thursday, June 26, 2008
isn't it beautiful?? my dearest took it from taiwan while on training as a 4th year present..hehe..and he was saying he risked his life to cross that 4 or 5 lane road that was filled with ongoing cars..hehe...it's really so beautiful!!!!!!...i wish i had a back garden filled with sunflowers like that...anyway, tmr's my last day of work..and i have a want to be fulfilled which i don't think it can be done on my last day tmr..that is to tour the damn hotel!!!i have yet to really visit the hotel..i've only seen the 4th & 3rd level which is the swimming pool area and i didn't take photos!!ohh mann...not that it's amazingly beautiful but it's something different from the other hotels in singapore and i like it very much...and i don't think i will have the chance to visit it after this time...
anyway i receive like a mass mail from kelly services..and guess what? they're employing for the F1 event!!!! it's like a 'hit 2 birds w 1 stone' (although i dun really like this phrase, cause it's damn chek ark thing...but i don;t know how to describ alrdy...hehe)kind thing you know..work and earn money & watch part of the race here and there..
BUT..i have school....and it's the last lessons of the modules...oh man....although it's only 6hrs of lecture i will miss...but but....it could be damn very important...how how?!?!?!
it's F1!!!!!F1 leh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!aahahhaaaaa...oh man...
anyway, that aside...this weekend gonna be a damn busy one and then monday i'm flying to krabiiiiii- - - > bangkok!!!!!!... (:
Thursday, June 19, 2008
jeremy's new blog..it's the dunno how many xxx no of blogs alrdy..but this one shld be longer i guess... http://web.mac.com/jeremy_tan/Site/Blog/Blog.html
just a quick update..last weekend went to my cousin's wedding in msia..shall not update much on that, but i do have pictures of a cute lil' girl which i will load when i'm more free...when im back dear accompanied me all the time. although i felt that we didnt talk much or really spend time tgt, but he was always there with me when i need him and felt so tired...
thank you very much my dear :)
and sorry bout just now for making ur day worst..i'm sure u're enjoying urself w ur friends..ur friends are always ur best antidote..hugs..
all these tiredness..don't know where it somes from..just 2 days ago was my dear poly mate, cailuan's birthday!!!!hee..Happy belated birthday!..
and also our 49th months.....going to bed w a heavy heart and a messed up mind...so many things to say yet...........
i miss you....
but after 4 years, what holds on to it? because of all the ups and downs that you're still together or because you already have a commitment there that's its a waste to let go..i love you, you love me, but are we still in love with each other?.the same problem surfaces and goes, comes and goes...2 really very different person you & me..
everybody loves him, boys, girls, male, female, auntie uncle, ah gong, ah ma,friends and family..of course i got the best of it, and also maybe the worst of it...he's such a pple person, he's good with anyone and everyone, that's why he is in the career he's in now...
but me? i'm none like him, i'm not good or outstanding at anything, i don't mix ard well, and lots lots more.. i really dont know why he's with me, it's cause he's soft hearted i guess...
..i admire the things he does that i believe i will nv find another guy like him, i can't bring myself to let go cause i really fell in love with someone that i nv imagine myself to do/change so much for..so challenging it's tiring to keep up with him, always so wild and random, so much energy and on the move, such colourful and new things.. so irritated with the things he does, yet at the same time admiring and so proud of the things he do..
on my side, i can never keep up with him..i can nv convey how i really feel..the way i show my love, my care and concern is how he deems as the opposite..i'm changing i'm trying, cause i cant bear to lose him..i know i dont suit him, i'm nv good enough for him, will nv be good enough for him..
he can easily find someone else, both of us know that..so i'm being selfish.i'm keeping him to myself as long as i can..i know i love him and can nv say enough of it because my love for him, to him will nv be enough...
we always say, love a person for who he is, cause it's him that you actually fell in love with..it's true..but the sad thing is pple change according to environment....and i can say i really did love him for who he is and again, he's changing so fast that i cant keep up, when i finally do, our timing is always not right..and we end up back to the same point..again and again until he finally says, this is the last hope and chance i'm going to give it...
we're both trying our best..and a new episode begins, new environments, new challenges waiting ahead..
my first love and hopefully the last....