A little family picture on first day of CNY=)

-Lost-

Today is Chinese New Year. I finally can rest now. Went to the temple for the whole morning, then I left for Uncle Eddie's place for brunch. Left that place at 12 and headed home to cook for daddy's friends who are coming at 3pm. Cooked fried wonton, kueh pati, steamed pumkin cake and ching teng. Finally got to rest at 5pm.

Swtich on my laptop trying to check some mails when I saw his message. He left a message on my friendster after 2 years. Asking for my forgiveness. What am I suppose to do? At the moment I saw a message from him, I hesitated to read. Our relationship bearly lasted 6 months. But the memorise are there till now. I even have nightmares till now. Why can't he let me go? Let me breathe, I would have rather him disappear from my life. Now I am lost. If I am to say I can face him with no grudges now, I'll be definitely lying.

I am tired. Really tired. Hope that tonight 's dream will bring all those sad memories and painful thoughts away.

Happy Lunar New Year to All.

-Cries-

My heart is so pain.. so tired...
Not that I am hurt by people but I am really sad with myself.
I am no longer the sophia in JC. I do not voice my opinions that easily.
take my CT for example, I do not voice my ideas that easily.
Hence, I know I do not benefit the class and at the same time digging my own grave in class.

Recently, I really feel like digging a hole and hide myself in it. Away from the world. Last week was a roller coaster. Getting lied to, getting let down, hectic weekend in school on sunday. It was really a miracle that I did not break down.

Today have another Creative Thinking lesson. Tell me, should I be happy? I am not. People are but I am not. Haiz.. Tell me.. what should i do?

Friday final exhibition, econs test, next wed BGS meeting, next thurs Batam trip, next fri interview with USANA and Long Far and next sun is Econs meeting. Following tues presentation, following fri econs presentation, following sat is BGS and Stats B mid term exam. Argh...

-Banana, Papaya-

I am so ANGRY!!!! Today I was helpful enough to offer my help to this SMU girl (we nv see each other b4). The story goes this way. I withdrew $50 to buy my concession stamp on my way home today. Before me in the queue was this girl that dress in short shorts and pink zara sweater. She used a very unpleasant tone to speak to the operator regarding applying of the tertiary card, but I guess due to her tone, the operator just brushed her question away. I can she that the operator purposely did not want to tell the girl where to apply the card. When I heard that the girl mentioned she was from SMU, I thought I should help her even more. So before she left the queue, I tapped her shoulder. Offered the information I know.
Not thinking she will thank me, I did not expect her to give me a *skeptical look* and asked,
" You are from NUS? Isn't the applying system different?"

I was shocked. How does she know that I am from NUS? Or wwhat makes her think that I am from NUS? Let me explain my point of view. I wore a white L-size Hangten T-shirt, a bermuda from Le'strang and slippers. Unlike the average SMU girls?

Argh.. When I mentioned I was from SMU, she looked pretty shocked. I guess my tone at that time had changed. *Banana Papaya* Argh...