Hey, if you're reading this (somehow), I want you to know I have forgave you long time ago, &you can trust me on this. I wanna talk things out, you know, to keep your mind more at peace and fix things proper, but I could not reach to you in any possible, rational way. If you thought I'm this one vengeful angst, then you're wrong. If you thought that I'm a bitch, probably you could be correct. Because I like things to go my way, but I had always put concerted efforts to help anyone I love and sometimes my ego &pride overshadows my true intentions. You remembered about th recent talk(?), I swear I didn't meant to be sarcastic (really!), but you were too arrogant &disgusting (???) about your approach to end things &move on. It caught me by storm when your abrupt, inhumane reaction sent us brainwaves that you were just trying too hard to prove something (?). Maybe you thought that we thought that you're a silly joke, but you weren't even that close(!), &do you know how insecure you are??? If you would keep up these non-fruitful game, then you would be. It made a huge difference in reading your long apology letter &all, but I guess you know this too well: it's over and life goes on; maybe that's why you were so hard on yourself to give us your perfect portrait and your own, self-worth, but honey, it's not working. Hey, until now, I could not figure what is in your reach and what's your bloody purpose because everything you show is so superficial &that makes you look like every other guy on Earth (but you wanna believe you aren't). I can't stress this much, but you disappoint me inside out, &altho I've read your side of story, this filmstrip of your story now doesn't make sense to any of my workable brain.
&P.s, sh's not hotter than sh is (wth were you thinking??)
P.p.s, I love my bestfriend more than you love your girlfriend.
P.p.p.s, I'm proud of her.
P.p.p.p.s, Fine, I apologize.
P.p.p.p.p.s, Your turn, pls forgive me.
P.p.p.p.p.p.s, Friends?

Labels: Strength to fall.

▲▲

It's like my heart dropped into th deepest, deepest of th seven seas, &it's struggling to find its way up for a breath of fresh air.
Some time &again, I only get a taste of a stealthy, unpleasant, grasp of hope.
But th future is blinding.
Th bleakness is killing me.
My faith is down, what happened to my survival mode?

*Heave a deeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep sigh;
SOOOOOOOOOOOOOoo,
results was very discouraging, although I jump 4 notches for E-,
all my other subjects were slipping out of my hands.
Ms Ong talked to me & sh kinda guessed correctly that I only read Chem th night before th paper itself. But sh was quite positive, quite hopeful, quite encouraging; sh said that sh didn't want me to receive th O's result and tear up saying that I could've done better. Hey, but I didn't cry just now, I was laughing w Ewee, remember?
Lit; I think I wrote th least in class.
Geog; it was alright cause I didn't even skimmed through th book, so yeahh..

Tmr:
Mr Tan went reservice so how th hell do we manage our physics w/o him?
Malay; out of th window.
Eng; down to hell.
SS; don't care.

Labels: Reality check.

▲▲

Friday.
1.
End of Prelims w A-maths P2 &Lit P2.

2.
Went w th lit students for Shakespeare's Love's Labour's Lost at DBS arts c.

3.
Peeeeeeeeeeektures.




































































I have pretty heavy things to lift off my chest.
I'll do it later.

▲▲

It seems like a bomb have been dropped in Transylvania.
It's like everybody is walking around town, lost in torn &tattered clothes, bare from open wounds, desperately pursuing someone to live their broken lives for.
Everybody used to be so strong, yet still stuck in th rubble, waiting to be exposed by th light of th sun again.
Some continue sobbing day &night with dried tears that creates stain on their used-to-be pampered cheeks.
But I slouched against th wall of th alley, watching over helpless kids with th glimmer of innocence cum pain scarred in their eyes.
Its been th hundredth time I'm straddling empty air, it is already a way of life, but how about my loved ones?
Th chilly wind lingers around them with marks of haunts of th dead.
Hopes &faith was demolished as soon as th buildings tipped over their sanity &strength.
This would be remembered, &this would make them stronger.
How dark else can Transylvania be?

Labels: I need someone who understands.